All the air left Peter's lungs with a giant whoosh. He stared at Miss Potts, eyes wide. He barely noticed when Happy started to apply some antiseptic cream to his hand because all his focus was on her, because there was no way Miss Potts was right. No way. She had to be lying. "Wh-what?"

"Tony doesn't hate you. In fact, it's the opposite. He loves you. He loves you very much, a whole lot more than I think he realized." Miss Potts repeated.

The tears were back, burning in the corner of his eyes. He stared at Miss Potts, unable to look away as he spoke the words that had scorched into the back of his mind since he woke up yesterday. "Then why did he kick me out?"

He sounded pitiful, like seconds away from bursting into tears. Which was the truth, but Peter was fifteen years old; he had some pride to uphold after all. A fifteen year old shouldn't be bursting into tears because someone didn't like them. Even if that someone turned out to be their secret father who also happened to be their childhood idol and recent superhero mentor.

What Peter wanted was the truth. He wanted to know what made Mr. Stark push him out of the lab. He wanted to know what was going through the older man's mind as he did so, even if it ended up hurting Peter's feelings by tearing him apart by the seams and left him alone to pick himself up afterwards. The truth hurts, and that's okay. At least with the truth, he could start to heal without the uncertainty of being lied to.

"Because he was scared."

Peter blinked. That wasn't the answer he was expecting.

"Scared?" He repeated, half convinced he'd misheard her. "But, but he's Tony Stark. Iron-man. He shouldn't be afraid of a teenager who runs into walls because he's not paying attention."

Pepper took a deep breath. Her eyes jumped around Peter's face. She noted the way his eyebrows furrowed as he waited, the glimmer of unshed tears that clung to the corner of his eyes; the sadness, concern, and surprise that those eyes reflected back. It was a look she'd seen many times before on Tony and Peter echoed it with surprising— or unsurprising — quality.

"If there is one thing you must know about Tony," Miss Potts started. "It's that he tends to think everything is his fault. That everything he's done is going to come back and bite him in the butt because he'll do something that messes it up. It makes him paranoid over every move he makes. He second-guesses and makes protocol after protocol in hopes to cover any horrible outcome that he can think of. It's something he's always struggled with, but after Ultron and Sokovia it got worse.

"Past choices that come back to hurt us happens to everyone, but Tony's tend to be more explosive and dangerous than a regular person's. He realizes that, which is why he is careful in who he allows himself to be around. To keep people safe, he drives them away. Only the most stubborn stick around, and because they do, he values them deeply. And because he loves these people so much, he takes their protection very seriously, and it hits him hard when one of his mistakes come back and gets his loved ones involved."

Miss Potts chuckled morosely. Memories of the past danced behind her eyes, and Peter swears he could almost see fire flickering in them as she continued. "I think that has always been part of the reason why he was so afraid to ever have a child. Tony knew that if he ever made a mistake and his child got hurt because of it, he could never forgive himself. And right now, he's afraid he made a mistake. He's afraid that he hurt you beyond repair."

She offers Peter a soft smile. Happy reached under her and grabbed Peter's other hand. More splinters bounced onto the paper.

"I know for a fact that Tony loves you. It's pretty obvious to Happy and I or anyone who watched him mother hen over you. He loves you more than he realized, and I think with the reveal yesterday the full weight hit him. I don't know why Tony removed you from the lab. He doesn't either. Tony is… : she hesitated, searching for the right word "...emotionally constipated at times. When overwhelming emotions hit him, he shuts down and reacts without thinking. It's something that he's done for years and what's gotten him into most of his trouble. I've been working with him to sit back and process when emotions hit, but I think the shock of finding out you were his son was too much at once.

"But afterwards, when I visited him later, all he could do was think about you. He worried that he destroyed you through a mistake he had made. He thought he destroyed your whole world and then cruelly abandoned you and that you were going to hate him forever."

The "I could never hate Mr. Stark!" that bursted out of Peter's mouth startled them all. Embarrassed and shocked by his outburst, Peter slumped in the chair and looked at the floor. "He's way too amazing of a person to hate. He's made mistakes, but he's done so much for the whole world than I ever can. I could never hate him."

"Just as he could never hate you." Miss Potts said. "Peter, Tony looks at you like you're the world. He talks and talks about you, never saying a bad word. After the fight in Leipzig airport and what happened in Siberia, I thought Tony was going to drop back into all his bad habits. The drinking and staying up for days in a row with no sleep or food. But you know what... he never did. He never fell back to those because he had a super powered teenager to fuss over and be an example to. Tony rarely cares about what people think about him. Its a product of being famous for his entire life. But he cared about you enough to try to be better and not fall into a depression because your opinion matters to him."

Peter sniffed and his eyes watered. Yeah, he knew that Mr. Stark had liked him. Mr. Stark was a busy man, running the Avengers, working on his company, smoothing things out with the government, being Iron-man. The fact that Peter got to spend so much time with the man was a miracle and proof that Mr. Stark did care for him somewhat.

To know that the man loved him though, that was something else entirely. It was almost unbelievable.

Happy started with the antiseptic on his hand. The cream was cold and it stung the deeper punctures that hadn't healed yet. Peter unconsciously flexed the other hand, feeling the way the freshly healed wounds tinged.

He…. he did believe Miss Potts. About Mr. Stark caring about him. Normally he wouldn't believe anyone telling him about Mr. Stark's feelings because how could Peter know they were sincere, but this was Miss Potts. She was a long time girlfriend-now-fiancée of Tony Stark. She had been by his side for almost two decades, through the thick and thin of his extravagant and dangerous life. She, out of everyone in the entire world, probably knew him best.

She had no good reason to lie about it either. It made no sense to lie. All that would do is create more complications and weave a tangled web of lies that they'd eventually trip over. It would be easier to say Tony wanted nothing to do with Peter and then send him on his way. Instead, she had invited Peter to her personal office. She took valuable time that could be spent on more important things to sit with him and explain what went wrong. She comforted him and was concerned that he'd gotten hurt. This was way too much effort to put into a lie.

Plus, Peter could feel the passion of her speech. Miss Potts's emotions were raw, with a voice of true emotion that filtered through the mask a business woman had to put up. If there is one thing he's always respected, its passion. He was passionate about being Spider-man, so how could he expect people to care about his passion if he didn't respect theirs?

And... and he really, really, really wanted Miss Potts to be right. The same part of his brain that wanted May to like and love him wanted the same thing from Mr. Stark. It felt the same desperation he had years ago right after his parents— or his mom and step-dad (adoptive dad?)'s —death when he was staying with May and Ben for the first time and was trying to make sure they wouldn't send him to foster care or out for adoption.

So, Peter believed her. Mr. Stark actually liked him. No, it was more than that. Mr. Stark loved him. He loved him. He didn't push Peter out of the lab because he was a disappointment. Mr. Stark pushed Peter out because he cared, and that was his weird reaction to show it in a messed up way.

A strange feeling rushed through Peter. It, it felt good. Like a warm beam of sunshine after a long cloudy day. Thai food after a week of home-made dinner attempts. Like web slinging after a stressful day of school, a release of tension and pure joy rush through his system.

There was always going to be that little thought in the back of his mind that said " You're not good enough to be here. Mr. Stark doesn't actually care about you." Peter doubted it would ever go away. For now at least, he could kick it to the curb and tell it to shut up.

The tears in the corners of his eyes didn't go away, but a smile crept on his face.

"Okay." Peter swallowed thickly. "I, I believe you."

"Good." Miss Potts cupped his cheek with one hand and smiled at him again. Her face was lighter, not as downtrodden as it had been only minutes before. It made Peter's smile grow.

Happy let go of his hand and took a wipe and went at the blood that had trailed down Peter's arms. Peter mumbled his thanks, to which the man grumbled back about it being his job. There was a good sized pile of splinters on his lap that Peter winced at the sight of it. Happy grabbed the paper and balanced the stack of bloodied plastic shards to dump it in the small trash can next to Miss Potts's desk. The trash can let out an unusual whir that piqued Peter's interest for a brief second before he brought his mind back to the conversation.

"Is," Peter shifted in his seat, mindful to not catch his jacket on the sharp points on the chunks he ripped out either side of the chair. "Is that all Miss Potts?"

"No." She said and Peter froze. "First, I want you to call me Pepper."

"O-oh. Uh." He stuttered, caught off guard.

"If we are going to get to know each other better, because I know we will, I want you to start calling me Pepper. 'Miss Potts' feels like we're in a business meeting and I go through way too many of those in a day." She placed her hands on his knees and squeezed them to emphasize her point.

Peter nodded. "Yes ma'am."

He'd known Mr. Stark for almost five months by this point and he still called him Mr. Stark. Mr. Stark tried several times to get Peter to call him by his real name, but it felt disrespectful to call the man who had done so much for him and the entire world by his first name, so Peter never had. Plus he liked the face Mr. Stark made every time Peter failed to call him by his real name. It was kind of like an inside joke between the two of them.

'Mr. Stark' was a safe and respectful honorific, one that never seemed too personal because Mr. Stark was big on personal space, and Peter could respect that. Some people needed that space, and Peter wasn't greedy enough to push. It was incredible enough he got any attention from Mr. Stark, so if the man wanted the distance he would get it. Now that distance was one safeguard keeping Peter from having another mental breakdown.

Now Pepper Potts asked him to call her by her first name, which partly eliminated one of those safeguards. It felt like a big step, going from professional and distant to personal, and dare he say it, friendly. Peter was hesitant to take it. He was going to though, obviously, because Miss Potts was scary and nobody turned down her and got away with it.

Mis- Pepper smirked. "Ma'am' is better. It's probably too much to ask for a solid 'Pepper' right away. You're too polite to jump straight to first names. You've got manners, unlike Tony." She patted his cheek and took the seat Happy had abandoned. The Asset Manager huffed but didn't complain at the thievery.

"Second," Pepper looked Peter in the eye and he wasn't brave enough to break the gaze. "I'm going to need your help. I may be able to stop you from spiraling into a vicious cycle of self-blame and depression, but I can't stop Tony. I know that he will want to make things up between the two of you, and I've tried to tell him that you are open to it, but he won't listen. Rhodey and Happy could say the same thing and he wouldn't believe them either. The only person who can make him believe otherwise is you."

Peter's breath caught in his throat and he swallowed. His fingertips tingled under the bandages. Just because he knew that Mr. Stark didn't hate him it didn't mean all his anxiety and nerves were gone. This was nerve wracking stuff! People get nervous around childhood heroes and he knew some kids got nervous around their dads, so it shouldn't be weird that he would feel anxious about seeing Mr. Stark again. The man was both his childhood hero and dad, two nervous things combined into one.

To be honest, Peter kind of did want to see Mr. Stark again. How could he not!? Mr. Stark was such incredible and interesting person it was hard to stay away. It was just, whenever they meet again, it was going to be really, really awkward and Peter still needed some space. It hadn't even been a full twenty-four hours since the discovery. There was still the shock factor on the discovery plus some lingering feelings on being shoved out of the lab so unceremoniously. Peter still needed some time to absorb all that he learned today as well. He hadn't mentally prepared himself for whatever conversation would follow after the awkward greetings they would share the next time they saw each other. So as much as he wanted to, Peter didn't think he could handle seeing Mr. Stark today.

Pepper seemed to sense his hesitance, because she took both his wrists and gave him a comforting smile. "You don't have to do it right now. Tony's not going to shut down and die if you don't do it today. It's more important that you are ready to face him, because he'll catch on to any uncertainty and blame himself for it."

Peter broke eye contact and kept them on his knees as bounced his leg twice, reluctant to look her in the eye. He flexed his hands uncertainly in her limp grip. "I don't want to do it today, if that's fine with you."

"That's totally okay." She let go of his wrists and pulled a Starkphone out of nowhere. It was a white version of Mr. Stark's phone, the one he'd shown off in Peter's bedroom. "Do you mind giving me your phone number? That way you can text me whenever you're ready."

Peter's mind went blank as he stuttered out his phone number. His thoughts spiraled endlessly between ' oh my gosh, Pepper Potts wants my number' and ' I hope I don't embarrass myself by accidentally sending her a stupid meme'. He felt faint when his phone vibrated with a text from an unknown phone number that bore a simple smiley face. He saved her as 'Pepper' in his contacts with a pepper emoji next to her name.

He also proceeded to leave his backpack in her office when they left, remembered halfway down the tower in the elevator, convinced J.O.C.A.S.T.A to turn the elevator around, and ran all the way back so he could splutter out apologies to an amused Pepper, who was waiting by her office door with his backpack in hand.

Tony rubbed his face, eyes straining to see the hologram right in front of him. It had been a month since he pulled his last all nighter. He was out of practice and feeling it. He was exhausted. His eyes blurred, hands shook, and he felt drained in a way that he hadn't felt in months. Tony could probably collapse right there and not wake up for a while, but sleep was the last thing he wanted to do right now.

If Tony slept, he would dream, and he knew his subconscious was terrible enough to pull up the one mental image he was desperately trying to keep out of his brain. Peter's face after he kicked him out of the lab haunted Tony enough when he was awake, he didn't need it in his sleep too. At least when he was awake he could distract himself.

He'd finished at least twenty more projects after Pepper left yesterday before F.R.I.D.A.Y shut him down. So he occupied himself with several physical unfinished projects that he had laying around. When he finished, he took apart and reassembled the coffee machine so it spat out lasers, then put it back to normal. By the time he fixed it, F.R.I.D.A.Y deemed that a substantial amount of time had passed and let him back on the holograms. He completed ten more projects, then got bored and decided to hack the Pentagon for the heck of it.

Apparently the Pentagon hadn't been enough of a distraction, so he went after some private servers of rich businessmen he knew were doing dirty deeds and anonymously leaked the info to the government. Then for the heck of it, he hacked a Russian satellite and pointed it into the dark of space just so he could watch the scientists frantically point it back at Earth from the safety of his lab. He almost chose to try and pierce a Wakandan server he'd found while strolling the internet one day, but decided against it on the possibility of creating a global conflict.

One day though. He'd try one day.

Hours later, Tony had resorted to 3D Sudoku. It was just like regular Sudoku, just in a three dimensional cube instead of a square. So he had to not only keep track of the numbers going up and down the lines, but also the numbers inside the cube. He had F.R.I.D.A.Y create them and had only completed two so far. He was stuck on this one, one tiny number throwing off all his calculations, and his brain was too tired to catch what was probably a simple mistake.

By this point Tony was hoping he'd just crash hard enough to not dream.

Of course, that didn't happen. It would have been too easy if it did. But in the meantime he had F.R.I.D.A.Y running through police systems for something that might catch his attention. Nothing specific, just reports of illegal trafficking, drug busts, crime circles, robberies, operations that might appreciate the appearance of Iron-man. Normally Tony didn't offer his services for small time felonies like that, but he was willing to take any distraction by this point.

Case in point, F.R.I.D.A.Y let out a beep and pushed his Sudoku game to the side and projected a police report next to it. "I found a police report you might find interesting Boss. It was reported about thirty seconds ago in Boston about an ATM robbery that happened at twelve-thirty pm."

"Yeah, so?" Tony minimized the report to focus on the game. "What's so special about that? ATM's get robbed all the time."

F.R.I.D.A.Y enlarged it again and Tony scoffed as the Sudoku cube vanished. "It's special because the damage found is extremely similar to the damage or the robbery that Peter tried to stop a couple months ago."

Tony froze. Peter's devastated face flashed before his eyes and he closed his eyelids and took a deep breath to try and conquer the rush of emotions that followed. Oh gosh, that whole plane crash took a different perspective. He'd been pissed and concerned before, but now a whole other level of fear and anger was unlock focus on the case, Tony, focus. He swallowed. "So they have weapons from the vulture guy's operation."

"It appears so." The report was pushed to the side and a slideshow of pictures that showed the damage started. "The damage and energy signal left behind appears to be slightly different, but similar enough to assume the weapons came from the same designer."

"Makes sense. We never did catch the guy who was making all the weapons. Toombs was smart, but not enough to build all that crap. Guess we should track his designer before he causes even more damage." Tony stepped forward to get a closer look at the pictures.

Whatever guns the robbers had used were powerful enough to cut through half an inch of solid steel. It looks like they had cut through the outer casing to pull out the metal box that contained all the money and then cut into the four-hundred pound steel box. The resulting mess was an ugly gaping hole in the sides. "Keep track of any reports that mention damage like this. Search for the unique energy signal. Mark the locations and try to see if we can find a radius of operation. It shouldn't be as big as before with their boss gone. Dig up anything else you can find too."

"Will do." The images disappeared. The three dimension Sudoku game appeared in its' place.

Tony stared at the numbers blankly. His hands absentmindedly fiddled with a screwdriver he had no memory of grabbing.

"Boss," F.R.I.D.A.Y interrupted. "You have an incoming call from 'Honeybear'. Would you like to answer?"

Tony blinked, his hands pausing. Why was Rhodey calling? He was back in Missouri with family on a semi-forced vacation. There wasn't a reason Rhodey would call. Just a check-up then? It had been a while since Tony last called him.

"Sure." Tony flopped into the nearest chair. The screwdriver stayed with him, and he went back to messing with it.

The speakers clicked and Rhodey's voice rang through the entire room. "Tony, why did Pepper call me four times last night? She sounded pretty upset when I answered. She didn't say anything when I asked, just said something about you and that spider-kid."

Crap. Exactly what Tony didn't want to talk about. Great.

"Nice to hear from you to, honeybear." Tony said instead. "How's the family? Mama Rhodey still killing it at the crochet club?"

Rhodey hummed over the line, not falling for the distraction. "You know she kicks everybody's butt. None of those weak-willed scamps stand a chance against her. Rest of the family is fine too, which is better than what you are right now."

"I don't know what you're talking about. I'm fine. I'm always fine. Just hanging out in my lab and working on some projects, you know, the usual." Tony denied. The screwdriver moved faster in his hand.

"Usual 'I need help but don't know how to deal with emotions' routine." Rhodey said dryly.

Tony winced. "Harsh. But fair."

There was a sigh from over the speakers. "Just tell me what it is Tones. If it involves the spider-kid, then I know it's something serious, 'cause you care about him. Was it an argument?"

"No." Tony said immediately, then hesitated. "Maybe?"

"Huh. Well, that's better than you denying that there's a problem in the first place. Okay, let's break it down, start from the beginning. What started it?"

Just like that, all of Tony's reluctance suddenly vanished, and he found the words spilling out of his mouth in one long breath. "I was doing a DNA test and accidentally found out Peter was my kid in front of him and then kicked him out while we were both in shock."

There was a long pause. "I'm sorry, can you say that again? The spider kid is your kid?"

"He hates me now." Tony continued instead. "I dropped that bomb on him and then kicked him to the curb because I'm too emotionally constipated to sit down and figure out emotions like a true adult. So he definitely hates me now."

Rhodey struggled for words on the other side of the line. Tony waited patiently, listening to the man's breathing and made sure his own continued in a steady pattern. The screwdriver was still in his hands, knuckles white.

"Dang." Rhodey finally said. "That is one heck of a bomb."

"Tell me about it." Tony groaned. He slumped in his chair and rubbed his face with one hand.

"But he's really your kid? Like, for real?" Rhodey pressed.

"Yeah." Tony chuckled humorlessly. "Got a DNA comparison and everything. F.R.I.D.A.Y can send it to your phone if you want."

"Yes please." Rhodey sounded way too excited for Tony's liking. "Got any pictures as well? I want to see what my new nephew looks like."

Tony frowned. That didn't sound right. "Didn't I show you Spider-kid's profile already?"

"No. You refused when I asked actually. Said something about how the kid didn't want his identity out so you weren't about to show me. Didn't even give me a name. You were pretty protective of him even then."

"Yeah well, his name is Peter, if you didn't catch that earlier. And I do in fact have pictures, plenty of them. His aunt sends me an embarrassing one every time he breaks a rule. Haven't gotten one in a while, which I guess is good." Tony summoned the holoscreen with a wave of his hand. F.R.I.D.A.Y had the pictures pulled up already.

Just seeing Peter's face sent a stab of pain into Tony's heart, because the kid's betrayed face from the lab flashed through mind. Tony batted it away, focusing on whatever Rhodey was saying.

"Why are you going through the kid's aunt? Isn't that a major violation of trust or something?"

"Not when the aunt is his legal guardian." Tony countered. His eyes lingered on a photo of toddler-Peter with an unholy amount of lasagna smeared on his face. The kid was beaming brightly at the camera, uncaring of the mess. It was one of Tony's favorites. "His mom and adoptive dad died in a plane crash when he was four, so his uncle and aunt took him. The uncle was killed about a year ago in a mugging gone wrong. Just him and his aunt now."

And not even that for much longer.

"Wow. Rough life. Kid's been through a lot…." Rhodey hesitated, fully aware what he said next could bring, then carefully tacked on "At least he has you now."

Guilt rose in Tony's stomach, mixing with hundreds of other emotions in a sloppy mess that came out as anger and disbelief.

"No!" Tony snapped. His grip on the screwdriver tightened. "He doesn't have me. If anything, he wants nothing to do with me!"

"Tony…"

"Don't 'Tony' me. I messed up. I know I messed up. And because of that, Peter is hurting, and it's my fault. This is just what I do, Rhodey. I hurt people. I hurt Peter, I hurt you, I hurt Pepper, I hurt Happy. That's just who I am. I'm sad that it happened, but I'm glad Peter finally realized that and is smart enough to stay away before I could hurt him even worse." Tony hissed. Anger flowed through his veins, making his vision turn bright red, his jaw muscles clench, and teeth ground together. "And you want to know the worst part?"

"... Yeah." Rhodey said, voice filled with emotion that Tony couldn't bother to name in the moment.

"The worst part is that I wish he'd come back. I miss him. I'm so sad he's gone that it feels like I've been stabbed in the heart every time I think about him. Every time I picture the face he made after I shoved him out of my lab it feels like the palladium poison is back again but ten times worse. I want him back, despite the hurt I put him through and knowing that I will only do it a thousand more times. I should be the better person and keep him away, like Peter wants, but all I can think about is selfishly getting him back."

Tony hung his head. Tears burned at the corners of his eyes. He didn't bother to wipe them. He deserved their momentary discomfort. Distantly, he wondered why they appeared now, not after Siberia, not after watching his parents being murdered on a tiny screen, only to find out one of the few people he considered to be a close friend had known the entire time, and not after that same friend chose his parent's murderer over him.

"Tony." That was Rhodey again. His best friend was hesitant, speaking slowly like he could hear Tony's tears and was afraid of setting them off. "Have you asked Peter what he wants?"

Tony scoffed. "No. He doesn't want to talk to me, remember?"

"That's what you think. But do you actually know?"

He paused. Allowed, just for one second, for the small hope that maybe, just maybe, Peter might want to stick around. Then the memory of his face appeared again, and the same emotions welled up inside him; the anger, the disgust, all directed at himself; and Tony let that hope shrivel into dust.

"No. I don't have to ask."

AN:

Surprise! Double update ;)