Chapter 1 - Death By Muffin

All human beings are slaves to something…

For some it's money, for some it's religion, and for some it's their deepest wish, their greatest desire.

Me? I'm a very simple man, and as such I have a very simple desire...

To live however I want to.

Yet, such desire can never be brought into reality due to the selfish nature of human beings that share the same wish.

If everyone wanted the same thing, for example winning in a lottery, and every single person in the world was granted that wish, chaos would surely erupt.

And so I went day by day, fulfilling what was expected of me as a High School student and earning passable grades, even if I disagreed with the education system of forcing all students to learn the same subjects instead of letting them specialise in those areas where they excel at.

Honestly, it's as if a bunch of people just sat down and collectively said "FUCK INDIVIDUALITY!!! NOW READ ABOUT MITOCHONDRIA BEING THE POWERHOUSE OF THE CELL!!!".

Anyways, now that you have sat through the rant about my clear dislike of school, time to talk about the fun stuff.

Hobbies, the core of the person and what defines them.

My hobbies were few, most of them boiling down to watching movies/TV Shows/Anime etc, Playing Games(I'd never claim to be a hardcore Gamer but if someone would call me a casual I'd kick them in the shins) and reading books.

Truly, if there is one thing you can(almost) do however you want to then it's hobbies.

In particular there was one franchise of such over-the-top Action Games that earned a soft spot in my heart…

Devil May Cry, it's 5th installment being my favorite.

And yet I never would have guessed what would've happened on one fateful night.

Monday(Shut-in's worst enemy)

It was a normal evening… well, as long as you consider a profusely sweating and swearing teenager who's playing a Video Game and muttering something about "Controller not having enough buttons." to be your normal evening.

"YES! YES! YE—FUUUUUUCK!!!" a guttural roar of unbridled rage escaped the mouth of one George Ghun(that's me) before looping back into serene calm which then shifted into acceptance as I stared at my monitor, currently displaying a massive A letter, followed by detailed information about what I was so passionate about.

You see, I had decided to play Bloody Palace as V in DMC 5… and I managed to get to the Floor 101 on my first try and even managed to bring Vergil down to a fraction of his HP.

But something went horribly wrong and I messed up my timing while dodging and got hit by a Judgement Cut.

"*Deep Sigh*" I looked at the clock present in my room and slumped my shoulders in defeat when I saw the hour.

11:47 PM

'Guess I'll be late to school tomorrow. Oh my, what a tragedy.'

But before I could go to bed and drift off into the dreamland the hours of sitting still and focusing on the game had caught up with me and my stomach rebelled, demanding tribute for continued sustainment of its host.

Aka: I got hungry after hours of doing absolutely nothing beneficial to society, something a lot of you could probably relate to.

So I went to the kitchen to grab a quick bite before going to bed and figuring out a believable excuse for being late to school… again.

My food of choice? Muffins.

Wishing to get to sleep as fast as possible I shoved an entire blueberry muffin into my mouth, but I didn't expect that it wouldn't go past my throat.

'Can't... breathe. Lungs... filling with blueberries.' my eyes watering down I fell to the ground and after a second my instinct came up with a brilliant strategy to my current predicament… so I reached for another muffin.

'Perhaps a... second muffin would... dislodge the first.'

…Maybe it's a good time to mention that I am not a clever man.

Well, if there is some silver lining somewhere, then it's in the fact that at the very least the muffin that made me choke to death was delicious, so I couldn't complain about that.

In my dying moments I forgave everyone who wronged me so that at the very least I wouldn't die with any hate left in my heart.

But it seemed like fate had something interesting in store for me because as soon as I started seeing the proverbial 'Light at the end of the Tunnel' and everything faded into white… I saw nothing.

It was the best way to describe where I was as there was literally nothing.

The surrounding had a bluish sky color, speaking of which, I couldn't tell the sky above from the ground I stood on. The ground beneath me was reflective showing my esteemed self and rippled like still water whenever I took a step.

"Eh, hello? Anyone home?" was the best response to the situation I could come up with.

"Yes." a cultured voice, definitely that of a man, echoed throughout the nothingness, with its source being behind me.

I turned around and, for all intents and purposes I am… or technically was a straight guy, but I couldn't help but stare dumbly in awe at the being in front of me.

He was unnaturally good-looking, undoubtedly the best looking person I've ever seen, everyone had some flaws in their appearance, but I couldn't see a single thing out of place on him, it was as if he was some work of art, made by a master sculptor as his masterpiece, no one should be that good looking naturally.

His silver-white hair and glowing blue eyes made for a perfect combination, but what stood out the most to me was his height…

At first glance he seemed to stand at an impressive 196 cm(or 6'5" for the mouth-breathers) easily towering over me.

Now, admittedly, I was pretty short, never really took or cared enough to get exact measurements, but suffice to say I was so short that when I got up from the chair I stayed the same height(or in some cases got shorter).

It goes without saying that, even if I wasn't self-conscious about my height, I never felt so small and insignificant before.

"Um, hello? You've been spacing out." at being called out I blinked, and then immediately clenched my fingers around my nose to make myself aware that I was in a dream…

Except I couldn't breathe through my nose.

The Stranger just chuckled.

"Yeah, that's an understandable reaction, but I assure you that this is very much real… as is the fact that you died."

At his words something clicked in my mind.

I died...

Everything started spinning.

I couldn't breathe, as if something was clutching at my neck.

And then I felt cold sweat accumulate all over my body, and then I felt hot, then cold again and so on and so forth.

"Who are you?" I asked, immediately on guard against… well anything really.

"'Who', or 'What' I am doesn't matter, similarly I don't really care what's your name, what matters is that I have an offer for you." The Stranger continued, unbothered by my panic attack, which seemingly started to lessen the more words were spoken by him.

Narrowing my eyes in suspicion I asked "Why me?".

"Because you adequately fit the criteria which I decided on… even if I would prefer that you'd be a more suitable test subject."

The confused look on my face must have been an adequate substitute for asking him about that so he continued.

"By 'more suitable test subject' I mean someone that would be much more familiar with the concept of Reincarnation, Isekai Anime and Self-Inserts. Unlike you who only had a passing interest in them…"

"In summary; my ideal test subject would be a weeb, but I think I'll manage."

Seeing the man didn't appear to be anywhere near being done with his rant I let him finish.

"As for why I'm doing this, well you see, I've always been interested in psychology, in fact when I was still a human I almost majored in it, so it's no surprise that I seek the answer to a question that's been bugging me for God-knows-how-long."

My confusion only deepened, which made the man smile at me, the same way a parent would smile at the antics of his child.

"Nature vs Nurture, which one is more important?"

I took a deep breath, my panic attack completely gone, and finally decided to ask the big question…

"Ok, what kind of offer?"

"The offer that I doubt you'd refuse and the offer I expected you to have figured out by now."

"You're offering me… reincarnation in another world?"

"And 100 points to Gryffindor, but yes that is essentially what I'm offering."

"And if I refuse?"

"Then I'll just move on and let you find out what afterlife you'll be going to while I'll be on the lookout for another more willing test subject."

It bothered me that he was referring to me as a 'test subject', it really did, but honestly, what choice did I realistically have?

"*Sigh* Fuck it, I'm in."

"Excellent, I think you'll be glad you made this decision."

A massive intricately detailed blue circle with various Runes and symbols I couldn't recognise appeared below me and as it started to shine more and more The Stranger said some parting words.

"Do be sure to have fun, and try your hardest not to die… it would be too dreadfully boring if you do."

Then the light of the circle became too bright and I could see nothing… or rather couldn't see the nothingness anymore.

After a little while my sight returned, and so I opened my eyes and was greeted with... a very big mural of all things.

Said mural, which stretched about 10 meters long, depicted a faintly smiling androgynous figure, said figure had both arms spread wide, was wreathed in a halo, their blond hair was flowing freely behind them and there were plains, lakes, and mountains in the background, overall it was a very good piece of art if could say so myself.

But while looking at it I was getting a weird sense of Déjà vu, as if I've seen or heard about this somewhere.

'Where even am I?' I thought to myself, my memories being more than a little unclear about some things…

I surveyed my surroundings in hopes of getting some more information.

Taking a good look around I saw a huge chamber entirely made of polished white stone, presumably marble, huge pillars with detailed sculptures carved into them that rose all the way to the ceiling, me and a group of what appeared to be Teenagers a year or two younger than me were on top of a pedestal raised above the immediate surroundings, which itself was surrounded by around 30 or so people that appeared to be priests praying on their knees(oh the irony).

Their leader, an ancient looking man with a long beard, wrinkles which seemed to have wrinkles themselves, dressed much more lavishly than his peers in what appeared to be popes robes and popes hat with an ornate staff, approached the pedestal.

"Welcome to Tortus, brave heroes. It is our pleasure to welcome you here. I am the pope of the Holy Church, Ishtar Langbard. It is an honor to make your acquaintances." The old man, who called himself Ishtar, broke out into a good-natured smile, which immediately set off several alarm bells in my head.

Just like The Stranger said, I only had a passing interest in Isekai Anime, thinking they were overrated as fuck, but from the few Anime I did watch I noticed a pattern…

Whenever it's a summoning by the princess and a few mages then you're fine, but whenever you are summoned by members of a church from another world then you're about to be used.

Still one thing stood out to me from Mr.I'm-Suspicious-As-Fuck's greeting.

'Tortus? Latin for 'Torture' that's reassuring.' I connected the dots and even though I didn't know a whole lot of Latin I knew a couple of words which proved useful in showing me that maybe, just maybe, I made a mistake by taking that offer.

In frustration I clenched my fists and then I noticed something…

I was holding a Silver Cane in my right hand.

Taking a better look at myself I noticed that I was tall, much taller than I used to be(only 2 of the Teenagers seemed to be getting anywhere close to my newfound height but they still were a couple of centimetres shorter), I also seemed to have pale skin which was covered by black tattoos which seemed to dye around 50% of the pale skin black, jet-black chin-length hair and an overall slender body build.

As for the outfit I was wearing, well…

It was a long, open sleeveless leather coat with the sides tied together by strings, it had inside pockets and a sewn-in corset-like vest in the front, I also wore black pants with a silver chain made up of skulls on the right side of the belt and a fingerless glove on my right hand… and much to my dismay, sandals.

I also had many accessories, to name a few: a tooth pendant around my neck, silver ring on my left middle finger, and a spiked bracelet that crisscrossed around my left wrist.

In summary: a Goth.

Checking out the inside pockets I found a brown, gold-embroidered book with a large "V" insignia on the cover.

Seeing as one of the last actions I did before I met The Stranger was playing BP as V and the specific words he used were 'Reincarnation' 'Isekai Anime' and 'Self-Inserts', it didn't take a genius to figure out what happened to me.

I focused my attention on Ishtar, who was leading the group into another room that was furnished with numerous chairs and long tables, all the while I tried figuring out why I was getting that weird feeling of Déjà vu.

And before I knew it, I was walking as if I was always this tall. There were no awkward steps, I simply walked as if it was natural which clued me in on a possibility that maybe, just maybe…

I became V…

AAAAAAAND ROLL CREDITS!

I'm back! Did ya miss me?! Probably not, or worse you probably don't know who the hell I am, which is completely understandable, but a few words are going to be spoken...

The only reason I'm even uploading this chapter is so that I can finally delete my other 2 fics which I said I'd delete in a week from posting my new Fic and honestly? They're just clutter anyway, so no one is gonna miss them.

Now, a few words about the Fic itself... I have no idea what I'm gonna do with it.

Seriously, the first major divergence I could put in that would almost make perfect sense would be after Miledi's Labirynth where the OC(Who is going to be called V and if you have a problem with that then that's your problem) splits off from Hajime's group.

And after that a lot, and I mean a lot of shit is going to go wrong since he would go to Vandre Schnee's Labirynth Aka: The Place Where You're Going To Fight Your Other Half(Or something, idk been a while since I read The Novel so I may not remember all the details).

But I'm still in the process of writing the overall story plan, so there's some hope left.

A couple of fun-facts for you, when this Fic was still Unnamed I planned on giving the OC powers of Dante or Vergil from Day 1, but then I realised that the World of Arifureta couldn't possibly handle the awesomeness of Dante or Vergil from Day 1, so I was left with 3 choices(At least in my head):

1 - Use Dmc:Devil May Cry's Dante or Vergil, and as much as I think it's a decent game that gets too much hate I also think that it's a shitty DMC game, so that's a no go.

2 - Use Nero, which was the original idea(I mean, this Fic's title is: Arifureta: From Deadweight To A Legendary Devil Hunter) until I realised that I'd just end up making Hajime 2.0 but with a BIGG-ASS-SWORD.

3 - Use V... and here we are today.

I'd say that I hope you've enjoyed it, but honestly there's too little to be enjoyed and FFN is being fucky by not allowing me to add a 'plus' on mobile docs in the app(and yes, I've always written and posted on mobile) so until I figure out a permanent solution to that mess the next chapter may be posted anywhere from NEVER to WHEN I FEEL LIKE IT.