"They can't be dead," Obi-Wan said again. He kept his gaze on his bare feet. It just could not be possible. A few hours ago, they had been perfectly happy; they had made stupid jokes... Stupid jokes, indeed. Couldn't they have said something more meaningful than suggestive remarks about sex?
"No one could have survived such an explosion," the clone trooper said.
Anakin had told Obi-Wan he would hurry to come back. He could not be dead!
"What shall we do now?" the clone trooper asked. "The Separatists will attack tomorrow, if not today. We need a commander, if not a general."
"Yes..." Obi-Wan nodded absent-mindedly.
That moment, another clone trooper approached them. "Kenobi, I just informed the Temple about recent events. General Fisto wants to speak to you immediately."
"Yes..." Obi-Wan rubbed his face, scatterbrained. "Yes... Erm... Now? Where is Master Fisto?"
The clone trooper gave Obi-Wan a funny look. "You can use the comm-station in your tent. It's Channel One."
"Oh… okay," Obi-Wan muttered. Of course he knew that. His brain was just not working properly at the moment. Still feeling like stunned, he trotted back into the tent and activated Channel One. Although Master Fisto was only a blue little holo-person, Obi-Wan had never seen him look so grim before.
"Padawan Kenobi, stay where you are. Don't do anything. There's no use fighting the Separatist Army back. Senali is lost to us. Without Master Skywalker -" Master Fisto's voice seemed to crack with emotion. It also could have been a disruption in the transmission. "We need to make sure now they don't invade Rutan as well. I myself am on my way to Rutan. All you have to do now is stay on Senali. Tell the troops to be ready for leaving Senali as soon as I arrive. Can you do that?"
"Yes, Master," Obi-Wan said dully.
And that was all there was to it. Obi-Wan would stay here, doing nothing. Master Dooku was gone. Anakin was gone. And Obi-Wan would just go on with his meaningless life. Go on, go on, go on... Another mission, another war... And there was nothing Obi-Wan could do. He should just wait here? He should not do anything? It was obvious he was totally superfluous. So why stay here, doing nothing, if he was so useless? He could just as well do something useful. It was not likely that he would be successful but at least it would be something.
The strange thing was: Obi-Wan did not believe Anakin was dead. He had to be still alive - just like Master Dooku. It was the same - Obi-Wan had not felt their deaths. They had to be still alive. Or are they dead and I just can't accept it? But Qui-GonJinn's death had felt so different. There was no question whether Qui-Gon was dead. And not only because Obi-Wan had seen his corpse. No, he had also felt it in the Force. When Qui-Gon had died, his presence in the Force had not only simply vanished - the "place" where he had been had not only become empty - no, the emptiness had been filled by something. Something like a negative counterpart to the once alive Jedi Knight, as if the emptiness had manifested itself in the Force. With Anakin and Dooku, however, things were different. Obi-Wan could not sense them anymore but he could not sense their deaths either. There were no marks in the Force that signalled their deaths. It was very odd that this happened already with two people who were supposedly dead. And it also confused Obi-Wan that no one else perceived the same as he did. Certainly at least Master Yoda should feel that their deaths were lacking in the Force. Or was Obi-Wan really imagining things? Was it because the Jedi's abilities in using the Force were dimmed by the dark side that he could not sense things as clearly as he had before? Was he only clinging to a last, desperate hope?
Undecided, Obi-Wan figured that the only thing he could do right now was meditation. Maybe he could gain some clarity in meditation. What had Master Dooku always taught him? While Obi-Wan settled down into a meditation posture, he reminded himself of his Master's words: It is never enough to just regard the little things. You must understand the whole and only then you can infer to the detail.
Yes, maybe Dooku's and Anakin's disappearances somehow belonged together. Could it really be mere coincidence that the two persons who meant most to Obi-Wan disappeared in much the same mysterious circumstances shortly one after the other? But why could someone have a reason to rob Obi-Wan of the people he loved? Which aim was behind it? Who could have a reason to do something like that to me? Revenge? Hardly. Why should someone go to such lengths for reasons of revenge? What had Obi-Wan ever done to deserve that? And if it was revenge, the lunatic certainly would want to show themselves in order to show off and savour the pleasures of their revenge...
In his meditation state, Obi-Wan's thoughts drifted back to a time when he had been seventeen and his Master had taught him an important lesson.
"I have a bad feeling about this," Obi-Wan muttered mostly to himself when he was walking behind his Master towards the shuttle with the Senators whom they were supposed to protect.
"You have a bad feeling about what?" Master Dooku inquired.
"Uh, nothing," Obi-Wan said, slightly embarrassed. He had not meant to say the words aloud, they had merely slipped his tongue. "It's nothing important."
"Did you sense anything?" Dooku asked.
"No, I just had a funny feeling for a little moment, nothing important, really. I'm sorry, Master."
"Hm." Dooku eyed him thoughtfully. "You have certainly heard about the abilities of some Jedi to catch glimpses of the future?"
"Yes, Master." Surprised, Obi-Wan stared at his Master. He could not possibly be suggesting...?
"Did you see something in the future?" Dooku asked directly.
"No, no, certainly not," Obi-Wan quickly fended off. "As I said, it was just a funny feeling. It could have been the exhaust fumes of some speeder or a strange noise or whatever. Maybe a face that was vaguely familiar to me or a new skyscraper, which caught my attention... It could have been anything. It's nothing to worry about, Master."
"Padawan." Dooku gave Obi-Wan one of his sternest glances. "You know very well that a Jedi must not let himself be distracted by such things. He must always be mindful of his surroundings."
"Yes, Master. I'm sorry."
Dooku shook his head slightly. "Certainly you have had funny feelings before because of some strange noise or smell, right?"
"Well, um, yes. I suppose everyone remarks something like that from time to time, right?"
"Exactly. But you never said before you had a bad feeling because there was an unexpected noise. Why did you say it this time?"
"I don't really know. I was not heeding my words."
Dooku measured him disapprovingly. "What was it that distracted you?"
"I'm not sure. I can't remember, Master."
"Well, as a Jedi you should be able to remember."
"I'm sorry, Master," Obi-Wan said, subdued.
"Focus on the Force," Dooku said calmly, not really annoyed by Obi-Wan's inattentiveness. "Call everything which happened during the last moments back to your mind. As a Jedi, you should be able to remember every detail. Find out what this bad feeling of yours was about."
"Yes, Master." Obi-Wan closed his eyes and recalled the events leading up to his "bad feeling". They had spoken to Supreme Chancellor Valorum. The Chancellor had said he was personally affected by the assassination attempts on the Senators, especially because some of the Senators threatened were close friends of his, like Senators Teem, Palpatine and Antilles. He had wished the Jedi good luck on their mission and asked them to do everything they could to protect the Senators well. Then the Jedi had gone on their way to the shuttle where the politicians were already waiting. Obi-Wan relived every moment he had walked down the docking bay. He saw the colours of the traffic lights and the many speeders and air taxis, he remembered the direction of each of them. He heard the sounds again, braking, hooting, signals to go... He remembered every shadow of vehicles flying over them. He checked every face of the people they had passed on their way (mostly security) and there was nothing - absolutely nothing - which justified his bad feeling.
Sighing softly, Obi-Wan opened his eyes and threw his Master an apologetic glance. "I just don't know what it was."
Dooku nodded, not annoyed but as if he had expected this answer. "So you mean to say that there was nothing in your surroundings which caused your feeling?"
"No. It's probably... well, I ate very much for breakfast today and, you know, maybe it was just my stomach which felt somewhat queasy." Dooku looked still strict but Obi-Wan had come to read his Master's expression during the years and right now Dooku was wearing the expression that meant that he was slightly amused.
"I think you would know it if it had been your stomach," Dooku observed. "Maybe the Force sent you a warning of something."
"A warning about what?"
"How should I know? You are the one with the bad feeling. I did not sense anything."
"Then it certainly was nothing important," Obi-Wan said, clearly embarrassed. If Master Dooku did not feel it, why then should Obi-Wan feel something? "I know I'm not quite in tune with the Living Force yet."
"Then listen more closely, Padawan. It is obvious the Force told you something. Were you not taught that you have to listen to the midi-chlorians?"
Obi-Wan reddened somewhat. "Yes, I know that..."
"Now I have a task for you, Padawan," Dooku declared. "Find out what the Force tried to tell you. It could be very important for our mission."
"Erm..." Obi-Wan cleared his throat. "So you actually think the Force did try to tell me something? You really think it could be something important?"
"That's what I think, indeed," Dooku said dryly. "I cannot remember the Force ever telling something unimportant to anyone."
"Yes, of course." Obi-Wan grinned a little bit. "But, Master, I have no idea how to find out. I mean, you just said that the feeling was not about my immediate surroundings. So it could be anything, right? How can I know what it was? How am I to start?"
"It is never enough to just regard the little things. You must understand the whole and only then you can infer to the detail," Dooku explained.
"Okay..." Obi-Wan still did not really know what to do. "I should perhaps meditate on it."
"Yes, I would recommend that. Alright, Padawan, let's do our assignment now. We should not let the Senators wait too long."
Together they walked towards the shuttle with the Senators. The closer they got to the ship, the more uneasy Obi-Wan grew. It was the feeling again. Am I imagining things? he wondered nervously.
"Padawan?" Dooku said sharply. He turned to look at Obi-Wan and observed him very critically. He seemed to have sensed Obi-Wan's unease.
"It's the feeling again," Obi-Wan said, feeling somewhat guilty for delaying their assignment again.
"Listen to it, Obi-Wan," Dooku encouraged him. "Don't fight it back. What is it telling you?"
Hesitantly, Obi-Wan put out his feelers in the Force. There it was again, like a disease still in its incubation period but ready to outbreak when the time was right. It felt as if the pathogen was this assignment but somehow it included much, much more. Many things which were still in the future… the sight was blurred. The Jedi were taught to focus on the present and that was what Obi-Wan did now. Suddenly everything was very clear. He saw their ride in the shuttle with the Senators like a red line through the Coruscanti lower levels. He saw their route and then... then he could not see anything anymore. He did not understand what it meant but he knew one thing for sure:
"We should use another route."
His Master looked at him, startled at his apprentice's sudden declaration. "Another route? What do you mean?"
"I mean..." Obi-Wan frowned, trying to decipher what it was he meant. "We shouldn't go through the lower levels." Surprised, Dooku raised his eyebrows. "It's not because I'm afraid to go there," Obi-Wan added.
Dooku nodded thoughtfully. He knew Obi-Wan was not afraid to go there because they had already had a mission in the Coruscanti underworld before. "Where should we go?"
Obi-Wan blinked in surprise. He had not expected his Master to agree with him. He had not expected his Master to believe him. Normally Dooku decided what they should do and what they should not do. He was the Master, after all. Now he suddenly wanted Obi-Wan's advice? Obi-Wan nervously scratched his chin. "I don't know which route to use. I guess any route is fine. Just not the lower levels."
"Alright," Dooku agreed. Then he announced to the Senators, "We will take another route. One that does not lead us through the lower levels."
"Why's that?" Senator Antilles asked suspiciously.
"It's safer," Dooku said simply.
"But we chose the route through the lower levels because everyone agreed it was the safer route," Senator Antilles insisted.
"Things have changed now. You must trust in our Jedi abilities," Dooku explained. "That is why we are here to protect you."
"Excuse me, Master Jedi," Senator Palpatine interfered. "I don't mean to offend you but I'd rather trust in bodyguards, security and decoys than in your Jedi abilities. We have planned this trip very accurately and it should be safe."
Master Dooku gave Senator Palpatine one of his most piercing Jedi-Master-looks. "I lead this assignment and therefore you will do as I tell you," he declared imperiously.
Senator Palpatine gave Dooku a dirty look. It was obvious he was not someone who was used to being ordered around. But he kept silent nonetheless and so they took a route through the upper levels.
In the evening, when the Senators had safely arrived at the Coruscanti spaceport and the Jedi had returned to the Temple, Obi-Wan and Dooku discussed the issue of Obi-Wan's bad feeling again.
"We need to find out if you have unusual gifts in the Unifying Force," Dooku addressed the issue.
"Er, yes?" Obi-Wan said doubtfully. "Why should I have such gifts?"
"Well, our assignment was successful. We were able to escort the Senators safely through Coruscant."
"Yes... But maybe nothing would have happened either if we had gone through the lower levels. Nothing proved there was really a threat."
"Of course that could have been the case. But I do not think so. You must know that I have some knowledge in the Unifying Force too - it looks as if I'm not as sensitive to it as you are - but the Force tells me we did the right thing."
Obi-Wan gaped. Did Dooku actually mean to say that Obi-Wan was better in the Unifying Force than his Master? "I still don't understand," Obi-Wan admitted. "Why should I have such gifts? Why should I sense things you did not sense? I mean, I'm only an apprentice..."
"Yes, but the fact that you are only an apprentice does not mean you cannot have great aptitudes. And it is the same the other way around: Great aptitudes do not necessarily make you a great Jedi. No, in order to become a great Jedi you must realise you have such gifts and, more importantly, you must learn how to use them efficiently."
Obi-Wan listened thoughtfully. "So you mean to say that, maybe, I have such gifts in the Unifying Force but I am not able to use them yet?"
"Precisely. In order to find out if you have indeed such gifts, we will consult Master Yoda. He is better at it than any other Master. And then, if we discover your gifts, I will teach you how to use your talents."
"I..." Obi-Wan was momentarily lost for words. It had all come as a surprise. Sure, he had had funny feelings before but he had never given it much thought. "This is very unexpected to me," he said honestly.
"It is also unexpected to me," Dooku agreed. "I had not expected you to have such gifts."
"Is it, er...good or bad?" Obi-Wan asked somewhat anxiously.
Dooku frowned. "Good or bad?" he repeated, his tone slightly disapproving. "Surely you have learned by now that abilities in themselves are neither good nor bad. It is what we do with them."
"Yes, but I mean... Would it be better if I was stronger in the Living Force instead of the Unifying Force?"
"The Living Force and the Unifying Force are both the same Force," Dooku explained. "It is just about looking at the Force from a different angle. There have been many discussions throughout the years on how you should regard the Force. I must say I am a tad surprised you have so little knowledge in it. I want you to do some research on it in the archives tomorrow."
"Yes, Master," Obi-Wan said dutifully. He would have done it anyway. After all, he wanted to find out more about his unusual abilities - if he indeed had them.
"Nowadays, most Jedi Masters agree that you should be well versed in both the Living and the Unifying Force. However, I think if someone shows exceptional potential in one way, they should use their abilities. Then it is helpful of course, if you work together with someone who is stronger in the other way. It is just important that you do not forget that there is another way." Dooku nodded absent-mindedly. He seemed to be deep in thought. "My former apprentice, Qui-Gon Jinn, was - well, he still is - very gifted in the Living Force. Whatever I tried to teach him, he was too stubborn to acknowledge there was also the Unifying Force. He chose to ignore it because he was convinced that the Living Force was more important..." The hint of a smile played at the corners of Dooku's lips. "He was what you would call the nightmare of every Master. A very rebellious, headstrong, disobedient Padawan who did not respect the Jedi Code and had a great knack for trouble." Obi-Wan smiled at his Master. It happened seldom that Dooku shared such private memories and thoughts with him. "I think every year I spent with him has cost me three years of my life," Dooku continued.
"He can't have been that bad," Obi-Wan said, grinning widely.
"You have no idea... We'll talk about it again when you train your first Padawan."
"Uh-oh... Considering what you said, I don't know if I want to train a Padawan anymore."
"There are some good apprentices once in a while," Dooku said, smiling slightly. "And besides, if you do not agree to train a Padawan, you can never get the rank of Master."
"Well, I do not really need that rank. I'm happy as long as I can be a Jedi Knight one day."
Dooku examined him critically, then he shrugged. "If you say so..."
"There's something else I don't understand, Master," Obi-Wan got back to the topic. "If there was really a threat in the lower levels which I sensed... then why didn't I sense other things as well?"
"First of all, it could be that you did not listen closely enough the other times. But it could also be that this was a very important thing," Dooku explained.
"But what was so important about that ride with the shuttle?" Obi-Wan said sceptically. "I mean no disrespect, but there were only three persons. There were situations when the lives of hundreds of people were in danger... I understand the senators are so-called important persons but aren't we taught that all lives are worthwhile and no life means more or less than another life?"
"That is true but your mistake is that you only look at what your eyes can see. You see three persons here and hundreds of persons there. But life is more than calculating. You must look into the past and the future in order to fully understand. The present is the shortest and all-to-fleeting time ever. You must learn to see beyond the obvious."
That was one of the best times Master and Padawan had had together. One of the rare occasions when Dooku had smiled. One of the few moments where Obi-Wan had felt he could ask his Master everything which was on his mind. There had been too few times like that one. All the same, it made those few times all the more precious and dear.
See beyond the obvious...
Obi-Wan racked his brain. What could it mean? If Dooku and Anakin were not dead, then where could they be and why? They could have got lost. Unlikely. Both of them were very great Jedi and they should be able to... Wait. Both of them are not only one of the best Jedi but also one of the very best warriors and generals in the GAR. So there was a reason for the Separatists to focus their attention on those two. As well as the Grand Army of the Republic focussed their attention on catching General Grievous. What had the Separatists done? Had they captured Anakin and Dooku? Why had they not killed them yet? Or did they have other plans? Did they want to use the two Jedi as hostages? Did they aim to press the Republic for concessions?
See beyond the obvious...
If Dooku and Anakin were indeed hostages, it was likely that they were in General Grievous's hands. Or some of the Sith Lords took care for them personally. Obi-Wan shuddered. However cruel Grievous was - a Sith Lord was much, much worse because they were dangerous. Obi-Wan did not worry so much about Dooku (he was one of the greatest Jedi Masters, after all!) but about Anakin. He knew Anakin already questioned the Jedi Order and the Republic and suffered so much from this war and his role in it. If a Sith Lord found out about it and used the knowledge to his advantage... What if Anakin believed some promises from the dark side?
In order to understand more, he went back into that time as a seventeen-year-old Padawan. He played the conversation through again and again, tried to look for a hidden meaning behind those words.
See beyond the obvious...
Suddenly, the quiet dim lit room in the Temple faded. It was replaced by bright red flames. Their heat was unbearable. It hurt, the pungent smoke which got in Obi-Wan's nostrils and made his throat dry and his eyes water. Dooku, however, was among the flames. They were all around him, licking at his dark Jedi robes but not burning him. He seemed to be untouched by them. Obi-Wan wanted to shout at him to get out of the flames because they would burn him but no words left his lips. His Master took one step towards him but the sea of flames around him followed him. He looked very gravely at Obi-Wan and his lips were moving. His eyes bore into Obi-Wan's and for some strange reason, Master Dooku seemed frightened. Obi-Wan strained his ears to understand the words but he could not hear anything. Only now he realised that he could not even hear the cackling of the flames.
With a gasp, Obi-Wan jumped out of his meditation. What had that been? Where had it come from? Sweat stood on his forehead as if he had really been in that place with the flames. His breath came in ragged gasps and his hands were shaking violently. Had it been a vision? Or a glimpse of the future? And if so, what did it mean? Was it a warning? Or a hint where he had to go looking for Dooku?
I have to do something! Obi-Wan thought desperately. The only thing he could think of was speaking to Master Yoda. If anyone could help now, it was Yoda. Hurriedly, Obi-Wan contacted the Jedi Temple. During the next minutes, his patience was tested. He spoke to several Masters (first Master Unduli, then Master Tiin, after that Master Vos). They all looked at him with the same mix of pity and annoyance. Pity because he had lost his Master and his friend. Annoyance because of his insistence to talk to Master Yoda even though they explained to him again and again that Master Yoda was not in the Temple but busy on Jabiim. But Obi-Wan did not give up. He asked the Masters to put him through to Yoda on Jabiim but of course no one was willing to understand that something a Padawan had to say was important enough to disturb Master Yoda in his important task on Jabiim.
It was probably this day that Obi-Wan Kenobi learned patience. Though it was certainly not the kind of patience the Jedi Masters thought of when they gently reprimanded the apprentices to learn patience. No, Obi-Wan's current behaviour could rather be described as stubbornness, insistency or even impudence. But finally his "patience" paid off and he was allowed to speak to Master Yaddle, who was slightly more understanding than the other Masters.
"Know you do that Yoda only leaves the Temple for very important business," Master Yaddle said disapprovingly.
"Of course I know his task on Jabiim is of the utmost importance," Obi-Wan said, trying not to sound too impatient. "But what I want to tell him is important too."
"Important enough to contact him on his mission?"
"Yes... I had a vision. A very important vision... I think."
"Hmm, careful you be when sensing the future," Yaddle said gravely. "No rash actions you must do."
"That is why I want to speak to Master Yoda about it," Obi-Wan said through gritted teeth.
She eyed him thoughtfully but at long last she nodded and said, "Speak to him you shall. But not yet. Tell him of your worries I will when he contacts the Temple next. Ask him to contact you, I will. Until then, wait you must. Patient you must be."
"Yes, Master," Obi-Wan said wearily.
"May the Force be with you, Padawan Kenobi."
"May the Force be with you, Master." That was at least something... Tiredly, Obi-Wan lay down on his sleeping mat. He felt unusually cold. He grabbed Anakin's blanket too and wrapped it around himself. The blanket was dirty, there was even a splotch of blood on it from one of Anakin's many battle injuries, and the blanket smelled of sweat. Still, it smelt of Anakin. Obi-Wan closed his eyes, pretending nothing was wrong and Anakin was still here. That was when the tears came. He could not fight them back any longer. He could not ignore it any longer. Weeping bitterly, he cried himself to sleep.