Author's Note: The idea, a few descriptions and a bit of the dialogue in this chapter is taken from the Clone Wars novel "Yoda - Dark Rendezvous."
Chapter 28
Vjun
Obi-Wan quietly sneaked through another gloomy tunnel. The many thick stalactites were bathed in the cold blue light of his lightsaber, which was the only source of light. He was somewhere in the labyrinth of tunnels under Chateaux Malreaux. He had already checked two other castles on Vjun – but neither Anakin nor Ventress had been there. The whole planet was deserted; the population had died due to excessive midi-chlorians experiments of one maniac a few years ago. To Obi-Wan, the whole planet looked like death and smelled like death.
Suddenly, the blue shine of his lightsaber reached a human skull lying in a corner. Obi-Wan paused and lowered his lightsaber. He had been in this tunnel before. He was absolutely sure because he remembered this skull.
Sighing inwardly, he slowly turned around and examined his surroundings thoroughly. He must have walked in a circle. It was frustrating. How was he ever going to find the right way in this underground labyrinth? Once more, he tried to reach for the Force and again he was overwhelmed by the sheer power of the Force here. At first, he had thought it was good that this planet was so strong with the Force. When it had filled him like this, he had felt a deep confidence. But now he was not so sure anymore if it was such a good thing.
The Force gave him more strength, yes, but he could not feel the little things anymore. It felt like information overload to his overwhelmed senses so that he could not focus on the details.
Okay. I mustn't get distracted. Obi-Wan deactivated his lightsaber and instead used the Force to feel his way along. Tell me where you want me to go and I will follow your will. Whereas normally he always could understand what the Force wanted him to do (being able to follow its will was a completely different matter altogether…), here it seemed the only thing the Force wanted him to do was use its power.
Very well then, I'll just keep walking. Standing here certainly won't help. Although it was completely dark, Obi-Wan closed his eyes in order to be fully able to rely on nothing but the Force. Your eyes could deceive you. The Force could not. Slowly, he walked forward. He just must not turn left or right because then he might be in danger of going around in a circuit again. But if the Force guided you, it was difficult to tell whether you were walking forward or turning off. Obi-Wan was sure that right now he would not even have noticed if he walked backwards.
As it usually happens when you close your eyes, you get curious at a certain point and you want to check – just briefly – if you're still where you are supposed to be. It was not any different with Obi-Wan. When he opened his eyes, he could assess that he had, indeed, arrived in a cave which he had not passed before. He could tell from the huge amount of skulls piled neatly over each other. Oddly, it was not completely dark here but there was a very faint blue shimmer – although he had not activated his lightsaber.
Where does it come from? He looked around but it seemed like the light was moving with him, always illuminating the skull or the stalactite he was looking at. It was almost as if the light came from himself… Oh. Obi-Wan's gaze wandered to the ring on his finger, the ring his Master had given him for his thirteenth birthday.
This ring has special powers. It reacts to dark Force energies. It shines blue as a warning.
Obi-Wan nodded slowly to himself. This was his solution. Ventress certainly radiated dark Force energies. Obi-Wan could not help but grin a bit at the irony of the situation. Master Dooku certainly had not given him the ring so he would run towards the danger… No, he gave it to me so I would learn to defeat the darkness within myself. Well, whatever the ring was meant to be originally for, it could help Obi-Wan now. He just had to go where the ring shone the brightest shade of blue.
Easy, he thought in satisfaction.
He had been a bit wrong there. Although the trick with the ring worked perfectly (every time he went into the wrong direction – away from Ventress – the blue glow in the black gemstone would flicker, and he knew he had to turn back and take the other route), he unexpectedly was met with another obstacle: namely three droids. Assassin droids.
Obi-Wan grimaced. Not good. His hand automatically moved towards the lightsaber at his belt – but too late. The first assassin droid had already fired a blaster shot straight at his chest. It was oddly surreal. I'm going to die, Obi-Wan thought in surprise.
But nothing of the sort happened. Actually, he had no idea what was happening at all. The lightsaber was in his hand without him realising he had seized it. And it was deflecting the blaster shots of the three assassin droids. Obi-Wan's arms and legs moved of their own accord. He did not have to think at all. Normally, his Jedi abilities enabled him to see things before they happened. Now, however, his muscles acted before he saw the things that would happen. Obi-Wan could just think one thing: Wow.
He wondered if this was what the Force felt like to Anakin all the time. As if you were floating above things, your feet hardly touching the ground. Obi-Wan parried the blaster fire with ease. It felt like the most natural thing in the world. The normally complicated lightsaber movements were just as natural as walking, sleeping or speaking. His blue lightsaber was moving so fast that it was blurring in front of his eyes. It was a mystery to him why it was in all the right places at the right time nonetheless.
It was also a mystery to him why he did not bump his head into any of the stalactites or why he did not stumble over any of the stones or skulls on the floor. In one swift movement, he deflected one blaster shot, ducked under the arm of the second droid and cut the long blaster rifle of the third droid in halves. Spinning around, he chopped the droid behind him to pieces: one arm, then the head, then the other arm. He jumped back and used the Force to slam the dismembered torso into the next attacking droid. It stumbled backward and, with a loud crash, the metal torso landed on top of it. While the droid freed itself from the remains of its colleague, Obi-Wan made short shrift of the third assassin droid. It was not hard work as this droid's rifle had already been cut and it now had to use a ridiculous substitute blaster.
Obi-Wan sneered slightly. Really, what could such a pathetic blaster do against the power of his lightsaber and the Force?! In a millisecond, the droid's parts joined the heap of junk on the floor to bury the droid that had just managed to scramble out from under the other droid's remnants. Shaking his head in pity for the last droid's fruitless attempts, Obi-Wan effortlessly decapitated him. Easy. A quick and clean cut. Done.
Obi-Wan clipped his lightsaber at his belt again and resumed his walk, relying on the ring's blue glow, as if nothing had happened. Too bad you didn't see that, Master Dooku, he thought. I guess even you would have been satisfied with my lightsaber work.
Meanwhile, the tunnel was slightly leading upwards. He must be there soon. The ring's blue shone brighter and brighter.
And then he arrived at a locked door.
But, as everyone knows, locked doors cannot stop a Jedi (well, as long as the Jedi has their lightsaber with them, anyway).
Obi-Wan ignited his lightsaber, which matched the colour of the ring's stone now. But before he could slice a hole into the door, the door was opened.
"Now, put that down, will you? We don't want anyone to get hurt."
Obi-Wan recognised her at once: a bald woman with stripes painted on her skull and lips the colour of fresh blood. Ventress was smiling.
"Where is he?" Obi-Wan said through clenched teeth, not lowering his lightsaber a millimetre, of course.
Ventress's blood-red lips curled even more. "Come in," she said pleasantly and stepped aside to let him pass.
Suspiciously, Obi-Wan moved into the room. It was a large room, richly furnished but old and dusty looking. Roses and thorns were carved in the wall. The deep, soft rug muffled Obi-Wan's footsteps. He looked down to find it spattered with blood.
"We've been expecting you," Ventress said softly behind him, causing Obi-Wan to startle.
His lightsaber still clutched firmly in his hand, he turned around to look at her. He was not sure if he should attack her now or try to find another way to free Anakin. She was still smiling, and then she moved aside so Obi-Wan could see the person who lay crumpled against the wall.
The lightsaber in Obi-Wan's hand shook slightly when he saw how thin and pale Anakin looked. His cheeks were hollow and his eyes were underlined with dark, heavy bags. Eyes that looked haunted. His hair was unwashed and dirty – as was his whole appearance. Splotches of dark, dried blood covered his torn clothes. His hands were tied behind his back.
Without realising what he was doing, Obi-Wan rushed towards him – but Ventress was faster. Before Obi-Wan had made even one step, she was kneeling down next to Anakin, one hand grabbing his hair roughly and pulling his head to the side, the other hand trailing a vibro-knife down his cheek so it left a thin, red line there. Finally, the knife came to rest at his throat. Obi-Wan stopped dead in his movements.
"Now, first thing you do is switch your lightsaber off. I'm sure you understand," Ventress said in a sweet, cold voice.
Frozen to the spot, Obi-Wan did as he was told. There was an eerie silence once the humming of his lightsaber had died down. All you could hear was the dull ticking of an ancient chrono.
"Very well," Ventress said and loosened her grip on Anakin's hair somewhat. "Now let's talk a bit. I have a few questions for you. For a start, why have you come here? I was sure you would show up but my Master doubted it."
"Do you really need an answer to that?" Obi-Wan said through gritted teeth.
She nodded in self-satisfaction. "I like to hear that." She nodded again. "I know what you want, Obi-Wan."
"Glad we sorted that out," Obi-Wan retorted. "Can you just let me free him then?"
"Free him?" she said softly. "No, that's not what you want. You want to free yourself."
"Oh really. And what is that supposed to mean?"
"You are fighting me so much," Ventress murmured. "As if I'm trying to hurt you: when all I want is to set you free. What you want, you can have. What you desire, you can take. He can be yours."
Obi-Wan froze. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"I've seen the way you look at him. There are things you want – why not take them?"
Obi-Wan shook his head as if to clear it from her seducing voice. "This is ridiculous," he said firmly. "I've come here to free him and I will do it now."
"Do it, then," Ventress said simply and stepped aside.
Obi-Wan could not believe it. This had to be a trap. He warily watched Ventress and took one hesitant step forward.
"You're hesitating," she said softly. "You know what it means, don't you? You'll lose it all over again. The freedom you have just gained. Tell me, didn't you enjoy fighting the assassin droids? It could always feel like that if you would just allow it."
Obi-Wan's breath caught in his throat. How did she know? How did she know so much about him?
"Why are you not a Knight yet, Obi-Wan?" she asked, never giving him the time to get rid of her voice in his head. "Or a Master? Shouldn't someone with your abilities have been knighted long before?"
"That is not my decision," Obi-Wan replied stiffly.
"Then make it your decision. You can do it, I know you can." She sighed to herself. "It must be frustrating to be a useless appendage, to follow other people around – but only if it isn't something important. To be his appendage – but only as long as he needs you and as long as there's no one better around."
Obi-Wan could feel the blood rushing in his ears. Images flooded his mind: Anakin, kissing him needily after a disastrous day, leaning into Obi-Wan's shoulder to cry… but never replying to the three words Obi-Wan kept telling him so often.
"Why do you let them do this to you? Why do you allow them to use you?"
"No one uses me," Obi-Wan argued weakly. "It was always my decision."
"Yes, I believe it was… But I don't understand. Why did you make that decision? Why do you give them everything you have? What have they ever given to you? They don't deserve your duty. They don't deserve your trust. They don't deserve your love."
"How would you know?" Obi-Wan whispered.
"I can feel it, Obi-Wan. I can feel your deepest desires. Yes, it is there. You cannot deny it. And why should you? Why should you deny your feelings? I think that deep down in your heart you know the Jedi way is a lie. Do you want not to feel?" She moved closer towards him, elegantly, like a dangerous Reekcat. "Our time here is so short, so precious, so sweet," she breathed. "To turn your back on it, to crawl into your monastery and teach yourself not to feel. What a waste. What a… blasphemy."
Obi-Wan pressed his eyes shut. How did she know?! He had known for a long time he had such desires in him but so far he had tried to fight them back. But was it really right to fight them back? Wasn't it natural to love? Wasn't denying love denying everything that mattered?
"You can have what you want," Ventress repeated. "You can take it. Kiss him."
Slowly, Obi-Wan opened his eyes again. His gaze wandered back from Ventress's smiling face to Anakin, who slouched wearily against the wall. He looked so helpless, so defenceless… so weak… so vulnerable.
He called Qui-Gon for help. He did not call for me. Never for me. He only made love to me because it distracted him from the pain of missing Qui-Gon. No, we never made love. We only had sex. I'm only a toy to him. His sweaty hand gripped the lightsaber handle more forcefully. This isn't right. I said I could live with it. I never expected more from him. I was okay with it.
"Kiss him," Ventress said again. "Why do you hesitate? Don't you think it's your right now? After all you've done?"
A trickle of scarlet red blood ran down the side of Anakin's face from the cut where Ventress had sliced his flesh. The blood slowly slid down until it reached the corner of his lips. Obi-Wan's gaze rested on Anakin's lips, transfixed by the deep red of the blood which was such a perfect contrast to the pale, almost white skin. It looked beautiful. It looked perfect. What would it feel like to kiss Anakin and taste the blood on his lips? Wasn't it his right to do it? Ventress was right, after all he had done for Anakin he had the right for this one kiss now, hadn't he? He had been there for Anakin all the time, had given himself willingly to Anakin although Anakin had never returned his feelings. He had gone looking for him, had gone through all this torment for him although Anakin had never even called for his help.
He can be yours.
It was tempting. To have the same power over Anakin he had had over the assassin droids… To feel this freedom… To have power over the Chosen One… To be, for once in his life, the one at whose mercy people were…. He was so sick of always being in Anakin's shadow… Master Skywalker… They would see how wrong they had been to underestimate him…
Padawan Kenobi, stay where you are. Don't do anything. There's no use fighting the Separatist Army back. Senali is lost to us.
He's not ready at all. He's impatient, defiant and angry. He still has much to learn. He absolutely needs someone to guide him.
Yet here he was: He had managed to find out where Anakin was held captive, he had found this place, had single-handedly fought three assassin droids… He had felt it: The Force was strong in him. But they did not see that. They refused to see anything good in him. They were only interested in their Chosen One.
Why do you give them everything you have? What have they ever given to you?
Nothing. Nothing, nothing, nothing. Anakin had never given him the three words, never. Obi-Wan could feel his anger rising. What was so difficult about saying those three words? Why did Anakin deny him that little bit?
What you want, you can have. What you desire, you can take. He can be yours.
Anakin had not been ready to give him what he wanted. Now Obi-Wan would take what was rightfully his. And no one could stop him.
Obi-Wan slowly moved forward and knelt down in front of Anakin. Staring at Anakin's bloodstained lips, he unconsciously licked his own lips. Very slowly, he lifted one hand to gently trace the trail of blood running down Anakin's cheek.
"Kiss him."