When Monday morning finally arrives, it takes all of Embry's self-restraint to wait until a reasonable hour to swing by Lex's house. She's already waiting outside for him when he does, a small figure drowned in a mass of clothing. Lex hops up from the stoop enthusiastically, jogging over to slide into the passenger seat. Her breath puffs out before her like a cloud, and as she belts herself in he can't tear his eyes away from her flushed cheeks. He's almost forgotten what it feels like to be cold, to suffer the winter chill, and Lex in all of her layers is a stark reminder of his lost humanity.
"Thank fuck. I thought I was going to freeze to death," Lex jokes, wiggling her frigid fingers in front of the AC vents. It still shocks Embry to hear her cuss, being all too used to her demure persona that she puts on for strangers. Seeing this other side of her is a treat, and as much as he'd like to tease her about her potty mouth, he resists.
Instead, Embry laughs a deep, throaty chuckle. "Hey, I never said you had to wait outside. That's your own death wish."
Lex's face crinkles into a smile as she sticks her tongue out at him playfully. She's in excellent spirits this morning, he observes, and Embry decides to chance his luck and give in to his cravings. He reaches out to grab her hands, entirely enveloping her small fingers in his. Warming her hands is a good move, he thinks - perfect plausible deniability if she tries to call him out - and he gently rubs her hands a little for good measure. Lex lets out a small, nearly inaudible sigh, and Embry silently thanks the spirits for his ridiculous body temperature.
"My own personal hand-warmer. What are friends for?" she laughs, bumping his shoulder. He tries to squeeze out a laugh in return but it feels hollow. Embry's not quite sure what he's expecting - they literally just had this discussion, she already told you she doesn't want to date you - but something about Saturday had him hoping for more. Trying to reconcile his own wants with her needs is a mission that he really wasn't prepared for, and he adds "grill Quil" to his mental to-do list. Surely Quil's theory of imprinting also comes with a survival guide, something that will help him maintain his sanity when approximately ninety percent of his brain is screaming to kiss her. Then again, that just seems to be his usual state of mind now.
Embry does his best to put his pining aside as they drive into town. He's grateful for the awful weather - he can focus some extra attention on the road, seemingly practising caution, while he works to rein his affections in. By the time they arrive at campus, he's back to messing around with Lex and keeping up their usual banter as if his heart wasn't stomped on ten minutes prior. He puts the truck into park beside Jared's beater and jogs around the cab to open the door for Lex. She thanks him, but not without a small shake of her head.
"Appreciated, but totally unnecessary. I know it's hard to believe but I do have functional hands," she says, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear. She avoids his gaze, glancing around the lot, and he can't figure out what's suddenly gone wrong. Embry was sure that she liked tradition, appreciated manners, and yet she's displeased with the courtesy. He wants to say something, ask what her deal is, but he can see Jared and Kim watching from the lobby and he loses his nerve. Instead, Embry defaults to his usual joking, cursing himself as he does.
"I need the exercise," he shrugs, closing the door behind her. "It takes work to stay this fit."
He's hoping that she'll giggle at the very least, reigniting their previous banter, but she remains stoic. Lex rolls her eyes and he can feel his heart splinter for what seems like the billionth time that morning. Yeah, he's a dramatic piece of shit, but he's dying to be her dramatic piece of shit, and her rejection is slowly killing him. Mercifully, Jared jogs over, Kim trailing behind, calling out to greet them. Thank God for those two, Embry thinks, shooting Jared a grateful look as he approaches. Kim links elbows with Lex and begins dragging her off towards their class, the two discussing their upcoming assignment with gusto. Jared and Embry trail behind, in no real hurry to get to class. Eventually, Embry speaks.
"I really, truly don't get her. The whole way here everything was great, we were talking, she was laughing, then all of a sudden, shut off. I don't get what I did," he groans, rubbing his palms against his eyes. "It's like every time I make progress with her it gets immediately fucked up.:"
Jared claps him on the back sympathetically. "I'll get Kim to investigate. I don't know either, man, but you can open my door anytime." He quickly ducks to avoid Embry's slap, guffawing so loudly that the girls turn around to stare.
"Jesus, Jared, I think they can hear you laughing out on the Rez," Kim quips amusedly, shaking her head. Lex smirks, but Embry swears he can still see a wrinkle in her brow. When she directs her gaze to him he immediately averts his eyes, feeling caught. It's times like this that he wishes he had that easy imprint connection, that Kim-Jared kind of ease. Knowing your soulmate is great, Embry thinks, but having someone who actually wants to spend time with you is better. Lex is a total mystery to him, a heap of contradictions that both draw him in and push him away with every second that passes. Still, he sneaks in an extra glance at her retreating figure, taking in every aspect of her. She's confusing, she's elusive, and, maybe eventually, she'll be his.
Despite his vow to Lex that he'd attend class more frequently, Embry and Jared skip their afternoon lecture to head out east to a scrapyard. Unsurprisingly, Jared was all-too enthusiastic to pick up another project, needing extra practice for their final assessment. Embry could use the practice too, but his intentions were squarely focused on Lex. He has absolutely zero ideas on how he'll convince her to accept the gift and actually use the car - can she even drive? - but that's a problem for him to deal with later. Instead, he focuses his mind and their discussions on cars, a merciful distraction from his imprint troubles. The roads out to the scrapyard are long and winding, eventually morphing into bumpy unpaved tracks that send the truck wobbling for traction. By the time they finally arrive, Jared's looking a little green, and though Embry's pretty sure they're extra-resistant to motion sickness, he really doesn't want to test it. The chilly winter wind swirls around them like a cooling balm, causing Jared to let out a sigh.
"Thank God that's over. Those roads are a killer for my stomach," he groans, making a mocking prayer gesture with his hands.
"My truck is still puke free," Embry says, "and it better stay that way. You puke, you walk. Keep that in mind."
Jared chortles. "As if you'd kick me out. You're too soft for that," he teases, jogging ahead to avoid Embry's attempt to push him.
They'd always been physical growing up, rough-housing and wrestling with the other boys, but phasing had introduced a new kind of physicality to their friendship. Fighting against threats to the tribe had quickly morphed into play fighting amongst themselves, with the guys revelling in their newfound strength and durability. The play had bled into their human lives, with the constant tussling and grappling acting as a conduit for their excessive energy. Things were better now. In the early years, it felt like a neverending battle to try and remain in his human form, compressing and restraining his energy and impulses to shift. With time and practice, Embry had developed enough restraint to suppress his wolf for longer stretches, provided he regularly shifted to run out his pent-up tensions. Running as a wolf was freeing in a way that his humanity was not; it felt as natural as breathing, a cathartic release that held no candle to relaxing in his human form. Embry tended to spend more time phased than the others, but that didn't faze him. The forest was his happy place.
Embry shakes his head quickly, bringing his mind back to the present. Jared was striding ahead into the gated yard, his usual speedy gait leaving Embry far behind. He jogs to catch up to Jared, who had already diverted his course to peruse the row of intact cars for sale. The yard was a total mess of car parts and trash, everything from salvageable components and absolute rubbish jumbled together in haphazard stacks and piles. Still, it provided far more options than the usual spots closer to the Rez, making the long drive well worth it. Jared was crouched beside a faded red hatchback that had clearly seen better days, probably a decade or two ago. All the same, it was in a decent condition, seemingly undamaged, unlike the rest of the cars in the lot.
"What do you think? It doesn't look too bad, probably not a ton of exterior work. I reckon she'd like the red," Embry says, running his hand over the hood of the car.
Jared nods. "Exterior seems okay. Wonder if it runs?" he ponders, carefully prying up the hood to assess the engine. On the plus side, everything seemed intact, albeit very aged. The engine bay was a greasy, dusty slop that begged for a thorough clean, though Embry feared that too-strong of a wash may cause the rust-peppered parts to disintegrate. Nevertheless, he could see the finished product: a gorgeous, vivid vermillion Mazda that purred with every push of the accelerator, and he could almost see Lex driving it. It was perfect.
Jared laughs, taking one look at Embry's face. "Guess we're taking it regardless, huh?"
Embry shrugs, a little bashful. "It's a good car. There's just something about it that screams Lex. It has potential."
Jared's a second away from responding when a throat clears from behind them. Both men whirl around, momentarily startled - how did they not hear a person approaching? - but it's only a wizened old man in grubby denim overalls. Embry straightens up to speak to the man, towering over his short frame.
"Didn't hear you boys come in," he croaks, coughing twice. "What are y'all after?"
Embry's eyes slide over to Jared, who nods slightly. "We're interested in the Mazda. Does she run?"
The old man pauses to squint at the car. "Hasn't moved in years. I've got the keys in a drawer somewhere. You boys got jumper cables?"
Embry nods.
"Good. I'll be back with the keys."
He disappears for a long fifteen minutes, giving Embry plenty of time to bring his truck into the yard. Jared's fastidious in assessing the vehicle, poring over each and every part he can reach to assess the condition. Embry even sends Jake a text with the details, asking for this thoughts, quietly wishing that Jake was here to peruse the yard with him. He knows that Jake's happy out west with Ness and the Cullens, but he misses him all the same. Things are different without Jake, like Embry's missing a part of his spirit, and he hasn't seen Jake in person in months. Embry mentally vows to run out to Seattle soon to visit him, hoping that'll assuage the guilt and longing that lives in the back of his mind. Of course, his sadness at Jake's absence is tempered and twisted by the feelings of his pack brothers and sister, but having grown up with him like a brother, he knows that much of the angst is his own. Even so, reading Jake's text of approval fills him with a rush of warmth that leaves him smiling down at his phone.
Embry's pretty well sold on the car before the old man returns with the keys, but hearing the old junker shudder to life seals the deal. It's in need of some serious work, many hours of labour before Lex will even see it, but he can imagine the end result and it's beautiful. So beautiful that Embry reaches for his chequebook, squaring away a solid chunk of his savings with the satisfying scribble of a pen. The man's so surprised to have a buyer that he even knocks a few hundred off the asking price too, as if the boys needed any further incentive. After a furious game of rock-paper-scissors Jared is charged with driving the Mazda back to the Rez at a pleasant eighteen miles per hour, leaving Embry alone in the truck to hope and pray that the junker makes it back in one piece.
Embry's crossing the Rez border when his phone chimes from where it's stowed in the centre console. He pulls over to check it - his mother's threatened him countless times against texting and driving, and he knows the one time he caves will be the time she sees - and he's delighted to see Lex's name across the screen. His broad fingers eagerly swipe the display, opening her unexpected message. Sorry for being an asshole earlier, it reads, come for coffee tomorrow afternoon? Her apology is totally out of the blue, and he's elated at the thought of her thinking about him. He forces himself to count to thirty before replying in the affirmative. He'd come for her any time she asked, he thinks, blushing a deep red as his mind contemplates the implications of the sentence. Lex dominates every aspect of his mind, especially the hormonal side, but he's far too inexperienced to be confident in being alone with her, let alone in exploring the trillion ideas blooming within his brain. Still, progress is progress, and he's far too aware of the fact that she'll never kiss him at this rate. Coffee will have to do.
Kim thumps her sixth book of the morning onto the stained library desk, flopping into her seat with a huff.
"Ugh. Can you believe I've got out all these books and none of them are even useful? Honestly," she sighs, slumping to rest her forehead onto the discarded textbook.
Lex reaches across the table to pat her shoulder sympathetically. "This one is decent. Not great, not terrible, kind of relevant. Only took four hours to get to it," she says, massaging her temples. They've got a huge paper due in a week, then their dreaded practical placements, and there's still so much to do in the meantime. She's stressed, to say the least, and it's making her head spin.
"Speaking of not great, what was the deal with Embry this morning? Man looked depressed." Kim levels Lex with a glance that has her shrinking low into her chair. Kim's candour is both refreshing and startling, and Lex isn't used to this kind of open conversation. She's used to being reserved, closed off, especially when it comes to feelings and boys and relationships. It's a new world and she's so entirely lost.
"I...I just feel like he wants something I can't give," she mumbles, thinking of how he looked in the truck that morning when she called him a friend. She recalls the furrow of his brow, the quick look away, the hand rubbing the back of his neck. Most of all she remembers the way it made her feel, the way she wanted to reach across and take his hand and tell him everything would be okay.
"What's stopping you from giving him a chance? It's not like you have to marry him or anything, just let him take you out," Kim says, reaching her hand across the table to pat Lex's.
She sighs. The movies never really show how excruciating these girl talk moments really are, how her entire body is screaming to get up and run away and never talk about relationships ever, ever again. Instead of going fully nuclear on the situation, she settles for a distilled form of the truth.
"Relationships freak me out. Being totally honest freaks me out. Honestly, I've never had friends before, and even this," she says, waving between the two of them, "freaks me out. Conclusion: I am so fucking freaked out, all of the time."
The librarian shushes them with such gusto that Lex belatedly realises her rising pitch, cringing at the thought of anyone else hearing her outburst. She's so beyond embarrassed, but Kim's soothing circles on her hand and supportive words calm her down a touch.
"It's okay to be scared. Just know that we care about you, okay? You can talk to me about stuff. I'm not going anywhere," Kim says earnestly.
After a moment, Lex nods. "Okay. I don't get it, but okay. Thanks, Kim. You're a good friend." Her praise is lukewarm at best, but it's got Kim smiling as if she's just won the lottery. She really, truly does not understand why they're spending time with her, bringing her into their inner circle, but she's growing quite attached to Kim and it's making her think that maybe friends aren't so bad after all.
A devilish smile spreads across Kim's face, slow and teasing. "So…" she says, stretching out the word. "You going to text Embry?"
Lex groans, but she can't deny her amusement. "You really never quit, huh? Fine. One text. I will be nice," she says, pulling out her phone. Kim whoops, resulting in the librarian all-but running over to scold her. The pair devolve into giggles as they hastily gather their things under the watchful eye of the stern older woman, abandoning their study in fear of further reprimand. Being with Kim makes Lex feel electric, alive, like she's finally letting go of her inhibitions and relaxing those boundaries. It's both thrilling and terrifying, giving someone the power to both build you up and to destroy you. Lex can't imagine any kind of destruction at Kim's hands, though; she's chaotic and dramatic and boisterous but, most of all, kind, and Lex actually trusts her, which is a completely foreign feeling. But as she looks across at Kim's grinning face as they step outside into the fading afternoon sunshine, she realises just how lucky she is to finally have a friend.
"Okay, so rule number one of this garage is no telling the girls that the car is for Lex," Embry says, wiping his greasy hands on his torn jeans. It took Jared an eternity to bring the Mazda back to the Rez, and even longer for the two men to successfully back it into the garage and jack it up. Seeing the car back at his own place was like taking the rosy coloured glasses off, and man did it need some serious work.
Jared groans, shooting Embry a mock-tortured look. "Dude, do you know how hard it is to keep anything from Kim? You're killing me," he says, throwing himself into Quil's arms.
Quil guffaws, jabbing Jared in the ribs. "Here lies Jared, dead after keeping his first ever secret."
"C'mon man, it's not forever. Just give me a chance to actually get in with her first," Embry pleads, his jovial tone becoming serious.
"Fine. But when Kim kicks my ass - and that's when, not if - that's on you." Jared's arms are folded and his face stern, but he remains stoic for only a moment before breaking out into his usual grin. "Well, what are we starting with? You can't keep me away from this old girl for too long," he says, lifting the hood for a better look.
Quil's quick to jump in, peppering Jared with questions a mile a minute to get caught up to speed. In no time at all, the men are settled into a peaceful rhythm working alongside each other, a routine honed over many years of trial and error. Their final list of necessary parts and tasks is near staggering in its magnitude, but Quil's bouncy enthusiasm at the thought of a new project helps keep Embry's spirits afloat. That, and the near-constant daydream he has of Lex riding shotgun, dark hair blowing in the wind as she rolls the passenger windows down. Shit, Lex could probably motivate him to rewrite a phonebook, for Christ's sake, he's truly that whipped, and the worst (best?) part is that he isn't even bothered by it. Having her around gives him a kind of drive that he lacked previously, a desire to be something more, and he's damn well sure that he's acted far more generously in the past month than the entirety of the previous year. She makes him want to be better, to be the kind of man that she'd actually pay attention to, though he has absolutely no clue what sort of person that'd be. Kim has no idea either.
Kim knows everything. She knows everything from birthdays to the neighbourhood gossip to the answers to that one tricky math problem, and she can remember everything effortlessly. When Jared had told her about the pack, she'd instantly recalled the tribal legends without missing a beat, taking the revelation in stride. He's never seen Kim stumped by any problem, so he knows that the one affront to her understanding - what the hell is going on Lex's mind - is going to be a tough nut to crack. Still, he's determined to wiggle his way into her trusted circle, confident that what he lacks in intelligence he can make up with persistence.
Embry's settled into a booth at the back of the diner long before Lex is finished with class. He'd mentally debated whether to wait for her outside the lab, walk her down the block, but lost his nerve in the face of her radio silence. He'd texted her twice that morning - nothing too clingy, though Jared confiscated his phone regardless - and had strongly considered detouring past her lecture just for a quick peek of the woman who dominated his thoughts. Instead, Quil had forcibly marched him out of the building after their shop class, saying something or other about the greater mission. And so he'd ended up stretched out at a corner table with only a dog-eared copy of Dune and his quickly diminishing sanity to occupy him, finding himself checking the time again and again until his phone chimed with a text from Kim: Jared says you're being a psycho again, pls chill & have faith she will come.
And sure enough, she had, ambling through the door of the diner with surprising ease. He'd expected her to be reluctant, perhaps even bailing on meeting him, but she'd strolled past the empty tables and towards him without her usual hesitancy. It was odd. Lex slid into the booth across from him, tucking her legs underneath her to sit cross-legged on the bench.
"Hey, you. How's it going?" Her voice is soft and smooth, a sweet sound he's sorely missed in the day - Jesus Christ, a single day - since he's seen her.
"You came," he says, sounding more surprised than he'd hoped to let on.
Lex scrunches her face into a grimace, humming a quick note of agreement. "Yeah, I've already been lectured by Kim about constantly disappearing. Thought I'd make a change and follow through for once," she says, biting her lip to hold back a smile.
"If I had a dollar for every time Kim called me on my shit," he jokes, and he's delighted when she laughs.
The waitress picks that moment to swing by, probably relieved that Embry's actually ordering things instead of camping out and pretending to read for the rest of the afternoon. Lex waits until she leaves to begin teasing him.
"Didn't pick you for the latte type," she ribs, shooting him a playful look that sends butterflies careening through his stomach like gigantic bumbling moths.
He leans towards her, resting his forearms on the table. "There's lots about me you don't know, Miss Lex." He's aiming for playful, even winking at her, and the flush of red creeping up her collar fills him with a quiet sense of pride. Knowing he has that effect on her, as much she tries to hide it, is immensely gratifying.
She pauses a moment before replying. "Okay, then. Twenty questions," she says, shaking her head as he laughs. "It's a useful game! Don't you dare hate on it." She's trying to be serious, but the laugh that bubbles out of her doesn't help her case. Still, she's grateful when Embry nods, hoping that the game will help her talk to him without all the awkwardness of a usual getting-to-know-you conversation.
"I will reserve my judgement," he says solemnly, causing the two to break into giggles again. "Okay, okay. First question. Pet peeves?"
"Easy. When people are late. My father always made me do push-ups if I was late, it's like my body just can't do it now," she says, smirking as she sees the surprised expression on Embry's face.
"Seriously? Remind me to never challenge you to a push-up competition."
"As if. You'd win for sure," Lex says, being totally unsubtle in eyeing up his physique in a way that makes her cringe internally. Still, how could she resist? The man is buff. "Alright, serious question. Answer carefully. What's the best breakfast food?"
Embry groans theatrically, shaking his head. "You're going to crucify me, but I gotta be honest. Ketchup and eggs."
He wishes he could take a photo of her expression of abject horror, so dramatic and so overblown to the situation and yet so completely hilarious. Their ensuing debate is so heated that the waitress pauses momentarily when bringing over their drinks, reluctant to interrupt something personal, and it sends Lex into a laughing fit that's so unfamiliar that Embry thinks he's seeing someone entirely new. He's glad she suggested the game - with every question it's like a little bit of her secrecy melts away to reveal more of her goofiness and personality and he can't help but adore her just that bit more. Embry loses track of how many questions they discuss, how many minutes pass, but by the time the waitress returns the sun is low in the sky and the diner is closing.
"Shit, can you believe how late it is," Lex mumbles, glancing at her phone in disbelief as Embry leads her out into the parking lot. She's genuinely surprised at how easily the time passed, how effortlessly the conversation flowed between them. Lex is certain that she'd be able to spend hours listening to his deep baritone discuss anything - hell, she'd pay attention to a narration of one of his repair books - and she's a little disappointed that the afternoon's already over. Lex isn't sure if it's the cool evening air or the rush of unexpected feelings that makes her shiver, and Embry's on her in an instant, wrapping his jacket snug around her frame.
"Don't even think about giving it back," he says, pointing at her. "You aren't turning into an icicle on my watch."
Lex huffs in mock annoyance, slipping her arms into the sleeves and revelling in the warmth he's left behind. She wonders what it would feel like to be pressed up against him, feeling his arms protectively around her like the time they went hiking, remembering how right that day felt.
"What?" Embry says, and she realises all-too-late that they've reached the car and she's standing there, lost in thought like a fool.
"Uh...nothing," she says, stumbling over her words in her embarrassment.
Embry raises one perfect eyebrow as he scrutinises her, and Lex wonders if it's possible to die from too much blushing.
"Call this the twenty-first question. What's on your mind?" he asks, his voice softer than before.
This is the point where she'd normally shut down, where she'd turn and run and pretend that nothing had happened. Lex wants nothing more than to flee, escape his questioning gaze, and yet she thinks back to their perfect afternoon and his comforting aura and maybe, just this once, she can stay.
"This is so embarrassing," she groans, looking away for a moment, and all Embry can think is how fast can she actually run?, expecting her to take off into the distance. Instead, she speaks again, looking down at her feet. "I was thinking about how nice last week was, and that I want you to hug me again."
Is this a fever dream? he thinks, wondering if he's somehow lapsed into a coffee-induced mania. But no, she's really standing in front of him, looking increasingly flushed and out of her depth. He's not inexperienced in the slightest, but he's never had a woman ask for a hug like this, not a woman like Lex, and the thought of hugging her, touching her, is both exciting and nervewracking. It takes him only an extra second of praying to the spirits for self-control before he springs forward, encircling his arms around her small frame, holding her tight against him like he's been dreaming about all week. Well, that, amongst other things.
Lex tentatively reaches up to press her hands to his sides, feeling the ridges of warm muscle beneath his tight t-shirt. His hands settle comfortably at her waist, holding her so close that all she can sense is his heat, his towering frame, him. Embry lowers his head until his mouth is tantalisingly close to her ear, his warm breath sending a wave of tingles through her body that should be illegal.
"If you want this," he says lowly, his lips millimetres from her skin, "all you need to do is ask."
Lex closes her eyes against his chest, attempting to regain her composure to reply, but only managing an embarrassing little squeak. He chuckles, a sound that she'll surely hear in her dreams later.
"Come on. Let's get you home," he says, relaxing his hold so she can climb into the truck. Her head's spinning, a dizzying flurry of hormones and exhilaration and surprise that overwhelm any sense of normalcy she had going for her. Embry takes his time pacing behind the car to take the driver's seat, and she's beyond grateful for the extra seconds to get herself under control. Her attempts are all for naught once she sets eyes on him again, but of one thing she's certain: there's absolutely no way in hell she can make herself stay away from him.
A/N: Thanks guys for your patience! Sorry for the delayed update - boring life stuff - hopefully the next one shouldn't be as slow. Would love to know your thoughts. Thank you to everyone who has favourited, alerted and reviewed - I appreciate y'all :)