This was a terror to write. I feel like I should mention Snow and David will not be good people in this story. Like. At all. Emma has trauma that she never really got over, and Ruby's down to help her through it. Let's give a shoutout to emotional accountability and self-healing.
Emma sat on the bench near the water with a bag at her feet. Her car was parked behind her, and she fiddled with the letter in her hands. It was a single note, an apology to Henry for leaving without saying goodbye. It was better than the alternative. She didn't belong in Storybrooke. She never did, and after her talk with Gold, Emma felt like her entire life was a lie. When Henry showed up at her front door, Emma had celebrated another year without a family. She had made peace with it a long time ago, and one bus ride later, she had a mom, a dad, and a son. Then on a trip to a world that Emma never knew existed gave her back the one man Emma ever loved. But Neal was also the same man who abandoned her and made her give birth in prison. Emma's life had gone from calm and lonely to chaotic and suffocating, but she forced herself to be grateful.
After all, she had a family. Wasn't that what she wanted?
"Mind some company?"
Emma twisted around. Ruby gestured to the bench, and Emma wordlessly moved over. Ruby sat down beside her and folded her arms.
"I haven't been treating you fairly, and I'm sorry about that."
"You were right, though," Emma said. "I shouldn't have been so quick to take Snow's side just because she said she was my mother."
"When you told me you were in and out of the foster system, it never occurred to me that coming here and finding Snow would be the best thing in the world for you." Ruby scuffed her shoes against the sidewalk and added, "I should've seen things from your perspective and gone about it a different way. But I care about Regina a lot, and I have tunnel vision when it comes to her."
"I went to Gold after I left the diner," Emma said. "He was the only one in town I trusted to be brutally honest with me."
Ruby shifted on the bench and asked, "What did he tell you?"
"I know why you're so defensive of Regina and why my existence in Storybrooke caused more harm for her than good for Snow. I know why the curse was cast, or at least Gold's opinion of it, and I know that somewhere out there, there are three people lost and confused because of my mother's actions."
"And how do you feel about it?"
"There was this foster home that I lived in right after the Swans gave me up. Mr. Swan had gotten me this stuffed duck for Christmas, and it was the only thing I had left. It was my most treasured possession, and one of my foster brothers threw it in the fireplace. When my foster father managed to get it out of the fire, it was too late. My foster parents told me they'd buy me a new one, but that wasn't the point. It was mine; it was something that I loved, and I hated them for not saving it in time. After Gold told me what happened, I amplified the feeling of losing that duck until I felt like it came halfway close to what Regina felt when Snow took her children." Emma flicked lint off her pants and added, "And it still doesn't come close enough."
Ruby patted Emma on the arm and stood up.
"Walk with me?"
Emma stood and shoved the letter to Henry in her pocket. Ruby walked her down the docks at a slow pace.
"Granny was a local baker before Regina brought her to the castle. Granny explained that she was looking after me, and Regina told her that was fine. When we moved in, I was so scared of doing something wrong. One day, like an hour after the King and Snow went on some trip to another kingdom, I watched Regina become an entirely different person. The castle came alive when the King wasn't around, and the staff laughed a lot more. The guards smiled when you passed them, and the kitchen was filled with music. One afternoon, Granny gave me a basket of muffins to give to Regina, and I asked around until I found her. She'd been outside near the guards' barracks kicking a ball around with this boy. He was no older than four, and his pants were so big. He kept stumbling and falling, but he got up laughing each time.
"I watched them for a few minutes until Regina spotted me, and she waved me over. The little boy squealed when he saw me and made a lunge for me. Regina started laughing and peeled him away. That was my first time meeting Emmett, who apparently liked meeting new people and hugging them. Emmett held my hand the entire time I was out there, and Regina fed him little pieces of muffins while he sat in the grass. His parents died in a fire, and Regina didn't want him going to the orphanage. She tasked the guards to watch over him. Regina never told the King, and the King never noticed this kid running behind the horses when the guards were training."
Emma listened silently as Ruby's eyes glazed over.
"Then Charles came into the picture. He'd saved Regina and her best friend, Liana, from being robbed while he was on his way home from the market. He had a little girl named Isabella, no older than two, and Regina brought them to the castle as well. If Emmett made Regina laugh, Isabella made Regina soft. Granny teased Regina whenever she could about how sappy Regina would get when Isabella was with her. And I understood. Isabella used to climb in bed with me and lay on my chest. Emmett slept on the floor next to us, his hand holding mine, and I grew to love them as if they were my blood. Emmett and I would chase her around the cots, laughing at every giggle that she made, and Regina would always tell Isabella that she was her happiness. And for a minute, that was our life. I was the big cousin, the one who got blamed for things even if it wasn't my fault, and Granny took Isabella and Emmett under her wing. Then Liana got pregnant. Granny was a nervous wreck, as was Regina, and we were on baby watch. When Liana gave birth, the entire castle silently celebrated.
"Liana named her Lena Kieran Mills, an inside joke between Regina, Charles, and Liana. We called her Kieran, though, and with the baby in the midst, everything was terrifying. Kieran was surrounded by people at all times. She was the most guarded baby in all of existence, and the King never knew about her. It was fun watching all of them grow up. As they got older, their personalities started clashing in a good way. Emmett finally got into the guard, but he was still goofy. He was serious when it mattered, but he kept everyone laughing. Isabella, on the other hand, was this firestorm. She had a wicked tongue, a dry sense of humor, and she spent her free time with the archers or the blacksmith. She loved working with her hands. And where Isabella was fire, Kieran was ice. They were so different, but when they were together, they were a force. I would always find Kieran in the library. She knew three languages by the time she was ten, and Isabella was the best archer by thirteen. Emmett was the only one who could keep up with them."
Ruby stopped walking and sighed.
"Charles died when Isabella was six. Snow had gone to the stables late at night by herself because she wanted to see her new horse. The King told Snow she couldn't see the horse because it hadn't been broken in yet. Charles just so happened to be passing through when he saw her, and Snow ignored his warning. Charles pushed Snow out of the way when the horse reared up and was trampled. Snow screamed and ran from the stables. By the time Emmett and the others got there, he was dead. Regina never quite got over that. Charles was Regina's personal guard, but he was her best friend. Isabella was too young to understand her father wasn't coming back."
Emma wanted to argue that it wasn't Snow's fault. But, in a way, it kind of was. She shouldn't have been out in the stables in the first place.
"Liana died a few years later. There was this virus going around that she couldn't beat. Kieran retreated into herself, and it had gotten to the point Isabella had to feed her, bathe her, and help her get dressed. Regina wasn't around as much as she wanted because the King had started to demand more and more of her time. Snow was getting older and was lashing out because Johanna had died. The King let Snow do whatever she wanted, and Regina got the brunt of it. Isabella and Kieran pulled away from Regina, and Emmett had been called by the King to be his personal guard instead of Regina's. I could only watch as my family fell apart."
"Then the King died."
Ruby gave a crooked smile and said, "Despite the rumors, Regina didn't kill him. She didn't help keep him alive, but she didn't kill him. He'd gotten bitten by a snake while hunting, and Regina knew the antidote for the venom. We all did, actually. It was one of those things everyone knew how to make because the type of snake was everywhere. Regardless, Regina took her time making it, and the King died. Snow wasn't home at the time. When Snow got back, she was so angry and blamed Regina. Regina told her she didn't kill him, but it didn't matter. Snow ran away."
"Gold never told me that part. He just said Regina was present when the King died, and people ran with it."
"Of course, they did. Snow didn't let them think anything else. She started a revolt against Regina. The kingdom protested Regina taking the throne, but still, Regina became the Queen. Just the Queen. She wasn't evil. She was a pretty fair ruler, actually. No one went hungry, everyone was living in peace, and it wasn't bad. Until Snow showed up and did the unthinkable. I was with Granny in the woods when it happened. My wolf was acting out, and I couldn't be around people. When I came back, Emmett, Isabella, and Kieran were gone. Regina's magic manifested that day, and that's when the Evil Queen was born."
Ruby let out a humorless laugh and shrugged. If Gold's story made Emma sad, Ruby's version broke Emma's heart.
"Snow started attacking Regina's convoys, injuring the guards, and stealing the food the guards were transporting to the castle. She set fires to the stables, freeing all the horses, and Snow cut down Regina's apple trees when Regina was gone. Then Snow met David, and they started calling for Regina to be overthrown. People were scared on all sides, and Regina was losing control. Regina had yet to do anything about her magic until Snow and David snuck into the castle again and set Regina's throne on fire. That's when Regina went to Rumpelstiltskin. Her magic did get better, sharper, and things were starting to turn around. Granny warned Regina to be careful, but Regina said she could handle it. And for a while, she did. Regina used her magic to get things back in order, helping the crops grow and restoring buildings that had fallen in all the fighting. The people were beginning to trust her again, and there was light at the end of the tunnel."
Emma shifted and chewed on her bottom lip.
"And then Snow announced her pregnancy."
"The people were rejoicing, and Regina had even given a formal congratulations. Snow White was about to give birth to a beautiful baby. But Snow started bragging. She said you were her miracle and that you were going to live a long life in the castle you were conceived in."
Emma frowned in confusion, and Ruby cocked an eyebrow.
"I take it Gold didn't tell you this part of the story," she said.
"What part?"
"The day Snow and David snuck into the castle, they… you know… in Kieran's old room."
"What!"
Ruby ran a hand through her hair and said, "Yeah, I had that same reaction. When Regina heard what Snow said, she was furious. There was no way for us to know where it happened until I took the long way to my room one night. One downside of being a wolf is that my senses are sharper than most, and I could… smell them. When I realized where the smell was coming from, I knew that would be the final straw. And it was. Regina snapped. In hindsight, yes, casting the curse was stupid. But whatever common sense Regina had disappeared the moment Snow opened those portals."
Emma hunched over and screamed in frustration.
"I'm sorry, Em."
"Why are you apologizing?" Emma scoffed, standing up straight. "You didn't do anything wrong."
"Maybe so, but this isn't fun to hear. It wasn't fun to live through either, but."
"Regina went through all of that, and then twenty-eight years later, I show up and ruin her life."
"You are your parent's child," Ruby joked weakly.
Emma snorted and said, "I just wanted a family. I was so happy to know that I had parents, that my son was okay, and I didn't want to jeopardize that. I wanted to make them happy so they would keep me around."
"Emma, I- look, I know I'm biased, but you don't owe them anything. They sent you to another realm without thinking of the consequences. You were an infant in a new world all alone, and then you got dealt the shittiest hand in life. That isn't your fault. None of this is your fault. It's a combination of events that started long before you were even a thought, and that's not on you. Do you know why I've been giving you such a hard time lately?"
Emma shook her head no.
"The person that walked into the diner before the curse broke is not the person I've been seeing the last few months. I saw you transform into this submissive and obedient princess. It felt wrong, and I was angry that you let them change you into someone you're clearly not."
"I don't- I don't know who I am without them."
"Don't be stupid," Ruby huffed. "You're Emma Swan. You're strong, confident, and you know this world isn't in black and white. You believe in truth and loyalty. Now that you have the truth, it's up to you how you handle it. Don't let anyone, not even me, push you into something you don't want. You are the one in control of your life, and no one can take that from you. So…. If you want to leave, I'll let you go. I'll miss you, but I would never make you stay somewhere you don't want to be. Neither would Regina, neither would Killian, and neither would Granny. Make a decision for yourself, Em. And the rest will fall into place."
Regina was distracted when she walked into the diner. It'd been three days since she'd seen Emma. Regina knew Emma was there, but Regina hadn't physically seen her. So, when Regina heard Emma's laughter coming from the counter, she froze mid-step. The diner was relatively empty, still too early for some people, but Regina was confused. Ruby was leaning on the counter, far too close to Emma for it to be anything but playful. It was a complete turnaround from the last time the two of them were together. Regina arched an eyebrow when Ruby noticed her.
"Good morning, Madam Mayor. You want your usual order?" Ruby asked.
"Yes, please."
Ruby nodded and went to the kitchen. Regina anticipated some kind of comment from Emma, hopefully, an apology, but nothing came. Emma sat at the counter with a cup of coffee and her phone in hand. Regina frowned, not out of anger but curiosity, and she sat down beside her. She didn't feel ignored, but she did feel like Emma wouldn't speak until Regina spoke to her first.
"Sheriff."
Emma lifted her head and gave Regina a genuine smile.
"Good morning, your Majesty."
Regina grimaced and said, "I know what I said, but you really do not have to call me that."
"Okay. Also, I should apologize for my actions the other day, Madam Mayor. It was highly inappropriate, and I can assure you it will not happen again."
Regina blinked once, twice, and she said, "Thank you?"
"You're more than welcome. Do you have a busy day ahead of you?"
"Not that I know of," Regina answered carefully.
"Would you like to have lunch with me?"
Regina's heart stuttered in her chest, and she asked, "You want to have lunch with me?"
"Only if you want," Emma replied. "I've been treating you wrong since I got here, and I would like to buy you lunch as a way to start my insanely long process of being a better person toward you."
Regina felt like she was in the Twilight Zone. Ruby returned with two bags, and she put one in front of Emma.
"Oh, thanks, Rubes."
"No problem, Em. Coming back for lunch?" Ruby asked.
Regina narrowed her eyes at her niece, but she fixed her face when Emma turned to her expectantly. Clearing her throat, Regina nodded. Emma's smile was positively blinding as she gathered her food and stood from the counter.
"I'll come by your office around one, and if you're busy, we can reschedule. Deal?"
Regina nodded again, and Emma waved before she walked out of the diner. Once she was gone, Regina turned to Ruby.
"What the hell was that?" she hissed.
"That, my dear Aunt, was Emma Swan."
"I have no time for your games, Ruby Lucas."
"No, I meant, that was Emma Swan. An entirely different person from Emma Charming."
Regina frowned and asked, "What changed?"
"Emma had a long conversation with Gold, and then she and I spoke a few nights ago."
"What did Rumple tell her?"
"The truth." Ruby propped her chin on the counter. "You know, I think I understand her actions a little more. I'm not saying she was right, but I'm saying you should go into this lunch with an open mind. Emma's had a pretty rough going with parental figures. Well, she's had a rough go with families in general, but I think your crush on her makes a bit more sense. She's not too bad once you get to know the real her."
Ruby's smile was teasing, and Regina snatched her food.
"I hate you."
"Love you too, Aunt Gina."
Regina glared at Ruby and stormed out of the diner. Ruby snickered and went back to preparing for the breakfast crowd. It wasn't until Regina got back to her office did she realize she essentially had a date with Emma in less than six hours. Regina's stomach rolled with butterflies and anxiety. The last thing she needed was her stupid infatuation making things difficult for her. But no matter how hard she tried not thinking about it, Regina couldn't wipe the smile from her face.
Emma chewed on her lip as she sat in a booth. Regina sat in front of her, looking every bit as put together as Emma expected, but Emma's nerves were shot. Regina seemed to notice, and she relaxed a bit.
"Why did you invite me to lunch, Emma?"
The way Regina said her name made Emma blurt out something a little too close to the truth-
"I like you."
Regina's face turned red, and Emma panicked.
"Wait, no, I mean, I like you as a person. Not like a crush or anything. I mean, of course, I think you're attractive. You're so attractive, but I just mean. Wow. Okay, hold on." Emma took a deep breath and released it. "I made an awful mistake in assuming that I knew everything about you based on what Snow and David told me. I shouldn't have been so quick to jump on board with them when you never really gave me a reason to hate you."
"I tried to kill you."
"True, but I kind of deserved it."
"No one deserves to be poisoned by an apple turnover," Regina said wryly.
"My point is that I feel like I missed out on an opportunity to get to know you as Regina, not the Evil Queen, and I was hoping to have a second chance."
"You didn't have to take me to lunch for that."
"I like food."
Regina rolled her eyes and said, "I haven't made this easy on you either, Emma. At first, I was afraid that you would break the curse. And you did, but then I was afraid because you came in and dismantled everything that I'd built in a matter of years. You weren't even trying to, but that's just who you are. You're like a bull in a porcelain shop."
"I think you mean China shop."
"Both are easy to break, right?"
Emma held up her hands and said, "I get the point. It's not a great excuse, but Snow and David wanted me. I didn't have that growing up, and I let myself be blinded to everything else. I let them make decisions for me, pick the food I eat and the clothes that I wear-
"That does explain the sudden amount of pastel in your rotation," Regina interrupted.
"Snow said real princesses wear pastel," Emma grumbled.
"Oh, please. Snow was the only princess that wore those abysmal colors. She was a walking Easter advertisement even in the winter."
Emma laughed and inclined her head in agreement. Her smile faded, and she plucked at her shirt.
"You know, a few nights ago, I was preparing to leave town," she said.
Regina's face fell just enough for Emma to know how big of a mistake that would've been, but then her mask was back.
"What changed your mind?"
"Ruby. She found me on the bench, and we just talked. In the end, she reminded me that I spent twenty-eight years without them. I am my own person. I'm not a princess, and I don't have the patience or personality for royal behavior. If anything, I would've been the one scrapping with the guards or the local boys."
"Why do you sound like someone from the nineteen-fifties?"
"Shut up. I watched Grease a lot when I was a kid."
"What is Grease?"
"How do you know what someone from the nineteen-fifties sounds like, but you don't know what Grease is?"
"I had a phase," Regina muttered.
Emma made a mental note to bring that up later, and she said, "Well, Grease is a movie that shaped my childhood. I like leather-
"Obviously."
"Can I please finish?"
"Sorry, sorry. Continue."
Emma snorted and said, "Long story short, I need to get back to who I am. My first step is choosing who I want as friends and being honest about myself. If Snow and David can't accept me, then that's on them."
Regina hummed and pulled a napkin onto her lap.
"It will take me a minute to trust you, but I can assure you that you're off to a good start. I find Emma Swan is a lot more tolerable than Emma Charming."
"Okay, Ruby called me that this morning. How many people actually call me that?"
"Just me, Ruby, Granny, and Killian."
"Killian?" Emma exclaimed. "Since when are you two close? Snow said-
"Lesson number one in our interactions. You should erase everything your mother has ever told you about me from the last two years. You might be surprised by what you learn."
Ruby slid over to their booth with her notebook and smiled.
"What's the order, ladies?"
"Chicken Caesar salad with a glass of lemon water, please," Regina said.
"One day, you're going to turn into a chicken."
"Shut up, Ruby."
"I'm just saying don't come clucking to me when it happens. What about you, Emma?"
Emma's first instinct was to order a salad as well. Snow commented about her picking up weight, but Emma wanted a burger. So, she exhaled and smiled nervously at Ruby.
"Can I have a bacon cheeseburger, please? With extra mayo?"
"Sure thing! Want fries or something else on the side?"
"Can I have cheese fries and a root beer float?"
"Oh, yes! I can finally use the new machine before Granny sends it back. I may or may not have promised to be making root beer floats more than I am."
Emma chuckled as Ruby ran off to put in the orders, and Emma blushed when she caught Regina staring at her.
"What?"
"The last time I saw you in here, you were picking at a salad and drinking water."
"Snow mentioned I was putting on weight, and I felt self-conscious about it."
Regina's eyes darkened a bit as he said, "Eat whatever you want when you're around me." She glanced down and back before adding, "And for the record, I think you look perfect the way you are."
Emma had been called beautiful before by men and women alike. But Regina's words stirred something in her, and Emma sat up straighter.
"How about we start over?"
"What do you have in mind?"
Emma held out her hand, and she said, "Hi, my name's Emma. It's a pleasure to meet you."
Regina's lip twitched as she grabbed Emma's hand and said, "Hello, Emma. My name is Regina. As for whether it's a pleasure to meet you or not, ask me again later."
"Deal."