Embry has never particularly understood the protocol for "what happened last night" conversations. His experience is limited only to a small handful of experiences, mostly related to chaotic pack occurrences that leave his head spinning. He distinctly remembers the last time he uttered that question, moments after awaking to find himself entirely nude and dirtied on the side of state route 110. A cup of coffee from Sam - it was generous to call it coffee; sludge would be more accurate - and an expedition into his brothers' memories had brought the hunt from the night before back into his consciousness, the recollections rolling in like the tide at sunset. Embry wished sometimes - okay, a lot of the time - that he could access Lex's brain similarly, flipping through the thoughts like CDs in a stacker until he'd find whatever he was searching for. He wants to know it all - the things that keep her up at night, her dreams, her fears; most of all, he wants to know exactly what's about to come out of her mouth.

She sits across from him in the booth, quiet and contemplative as she stirs the sugar into her coffee. Her eyes trace the spoon as it completes lazy circles around the mug, dissolving the granules into whispers of sweetness. For once, he isn't intimidated by her silence - he knows now that she wants to be around him, at least to some small degree, and it's enough of a comfort to relax him.

"So…" he starts, stretching the word out. "What do you want to talk about?"

She rolls her eyes playfully, propping her chin on her palm. He doesn't dare to share his thoughts, but with the light streaming into the diner, beaming upon her freckled face, all he can think of is how positively gorgeous she is. She crinkles her nose at his stare.

"You're a dolt," she says; she could say anything to him and he'd still gaze at her like she has the stars in her eyes.

"Okay, okay, I'm not good with words like a certain someone," he teases, enjoying the way she shakes her head. "You want to talk about last night. So, let's talk about it. What's on your mind?"

She casts her eyes downward for a short while, gazing into the depths of her mug.

"I feel weird about calling you yesterday. Like, you're obviously my friend, right, but when all of that was happening all I could think about is how badly I wanted you there. You were on my mind. You, not Kim, and Kim's meant to be my best friend."

Lex's forehead creases in thought as the words come rushing out, her eyes still averted from him. It's both a blessing and a curse that the waitress stops by with their waffles - he's starving, but he's finally getting a hint of transparency from her, and he wants this moment to stretch on into forever. He thinks while he chews his first bite, deliciously sweet from the pools of syrup on the dish.

"I think," he starts, in between bites, "that it doesn't matter why you called me over Kim. If you called Kim, she'd call Jared, and he'd tell me anyway, so it's basically the same thing."

Her frown deepens. "I don't know, Em. You and I...it's just...weird, okay. This is weird," she says, waving her hands around as if she could somehow grasp the words that elude her.

Embry lowers his fork. Her distress is a little off-putting - sleeping beside her was like moving forwards, but it's starting to feel like the curtains are closing on her openness.

"You know, it doesn't really matter to me what we are. I like being with you. I like it when you call me, or when you need my help. I like you, Lex. If you want to be friends, that's cool. You can still call me whenever. If you want more than that, if you want a cuddle here and there, we can do that. You can me whatever you want," he says, stretching his arm out to rest his digits on the centre of the table.

Lex studies his hand with an unreadable expression. When she speaks, her voice is low and throaty, almost a whisper. "Can you promise me you won't ask me to be your girlfriend?"

His heart sinks, but he nods. "Can you promise me that you won't disappear again?"

She nods, finally cracking a smile. "Deal," she says, placing her palm atop his hand.

Embry can't help but jump a little at the unanticipated contact. Even though he and Lex aren't committed to each other, he's stopped seeing other women regardless - there's no comparison; how could it be fair? - and it's like his body has forgotten what human contact feels like. Lex's touch is entirely alien, unfamiliar; she's all softness and vulnerability, gentle and sweet, in complete contrast to the usual rough and tumble interactions he's used to. Being with her is like a complete recalibration of everything he thought he knew, something that's both exciting and unsettling.

Still, as he sits across from her in the booth, her hand pressed against his, he can't imagine a better turn of events. The more time he spends with her, the more he thinks about Quil's theories of imprinting. Would he have pursued her if he wasn't a shifter? Would she have even given him the time of day without his supernaturally enhanced physique? For all of the musing he's been doing on the topic, he'd like to think that yes, she would have still been on his mind, had things been different. She would have still befriended Kim, and so he would have still met her. She'd still be as irresistibly alluring, albeit in a totally inaccessible way, and he likes to think that he would have had the patience to befriend her.

Trying to imagine his life's trajectory without phasing is like trying to imagine a whole different universe. Transforming into a comically huge wolf colours every aspect of his life in a way that outsiders simply cannot understand. How are you supposed to explain that battling vampires is your main form of cardio, or that at the tender age of sixteen you fought in an inter-species war? His version of existence is so far removed from his peers' reality that sometimes he feels like more beast than man, like a stranger among his community. His connection with Lex is one of the only bright spots of the whole wolf phenomenon. The knowledge that she needs the connection as much as he does helps ground him, helps infuse patience into every move he makes. All he can hope for is for her to share that patience when he finally shares the truth.

Lex spends five days in La Push that week. Exactly four of them end up with her in Embry's bed. And, no, despite what Kim's suggestive teasing implies, it's nothing of the sort. After their talk over breakfast, Lex had ended up on Kim's doorstep, seeking the kind of support that only a best friend is qualified to give.

"Hang on, I need you to go back like, five steps. You guys are doing what?" Kim had asked, her eyebrows knitting together in confusion.

"Well, we talked and we agreed to be friends," she explained.

Kim raises an eyebrow. "See, you say that, but then you start telling me how you woke up cuddling him, and then you start blushing - see! I told you!" she teases, reaching one finger out to poke at her cheek.

Lex swats her hand away, laughing. "Yeah, okay, it sounds kind of dumb when you put it that way. But for real, it feels like he gets how I feel. It's nice," she says, her voice contemplative. She's got that far away look in her eye she often gets when she talks about Embry, a kind of softness that's rare for her to show.

Kim can't help the grin that spreads across her face. "I'm happy you're happy," she says, "even if it makes zero sense to me."

They'd moved on from talking about the guys then, immersing themselves in a formidable pile of work remaining from the week prior. So immersed, in fact, that they didn't notice Embry and Jared sneaking past in the treeline bordering Kim's yard, appearing like a pair of predators to the untrained eye.

I still can't believe she's actually, like, touching you, man. That's crazy, Collin thinks, briefly diverting his focus from his rounds.

God, this is the most virginal shit I've heard in a long time.

Embry growls, wishing he could come up with a better defence for his girl. Shut it, Paul. Quit acting like Rachel didn't hate your guts for months.

Yeah, Call, my girl hated me and she still couldn't resist me. You wish you were that good.

Paul, don't get him started, Jared interjects, his thoughts telegraphing his weariness as clear as day.

Fine, Paul grumbles, no shit-stirring today. Tomorrow though… he trails off, taunting as ever.

I'll allow it, Jared thinks, his thoughts rapidly flicking between Lex and Kim. You're doing good with her, Em. Even Kim thinks she's been happier lately. He replays snippets of Kim talking from a previous day, reading messages aloud from her phone.

"Listen to this, Jar - Em's honestly so sweet. Shit, it makes me actually want to go to work so I have an excuse to see him after." Kim looks up from her phone, beaming at him. "How good is that? Oh, they're so going to get together soon. I can feel it!" she announces, pressing her hand against her heart as she flops back onto the couch. In his memory, Jared speaks.

"You're such a meddler, Kimmy. Maybe you should take up matchmaking."

She snorts. "Already on it, big boy. Look at the two of them, getting together without me having to drag them into the same room. It's a Christmas miracle!"

Embry's heart feels like it's about to burst. Hearing how Lex feels is such a rarity that he wants to etch the memory into his brain, tucking it away for later moments of doubt.

Kim is a fucking angel, Paul thinks. Embry, Rach's always on about how I need to surprise her with wine more. Get her a good box.

Jared shakes his head, his grown-out fur whipping around him. More wine for Kim? Lord help me.

One hour and eight dollars later, Embry's certain that he's secured Kim's efforts for at least a short while longer. Jared had been reluctant to enter the liquor store with him - not that they'd be carded, what with their over-developed physiques - feeling a little apprehensive about encouraging Kim's preferred mode of relaxation. They'd all started drinking when they were young, the watery beers around the bonfires morphing into something stronger as they'd aged, but Jared still worried about Kim. When he looked at her, he wasn't seeing the woman he loved with all of his heart. He didn't see his fun-loving, ambitious girlfriend. No, when he looked at Kim, sprawled out on the sofa with a glass of sangria in hand, he saw his mother.

Embry had met Mrs Cameron a handful of times during their childhood. He didn't find out Jared's secret until years later when they'd phased together deep in the woods of the Rez. The memories of the older woman, prostrate on the staircase with a can in hand, or retching into the kitchen sink at eight a.m. on a school morning, lingered in the collective consciousness. Jared loathed to speak of her, but the flashes from the past were enough for Embry. Fourth grade, when Jared had come to school after a week's absence with a smattering of yellow-brown marks peeking from beneath his collar. Sixth grade, when he wore the same dirty tracksuit for a week straight. Eighth grade, when Jared was the only kid in their class without a parent at the middle school graduation. Ninth grade, when the school counsellor interrupted their social studies class to tell Jared his mom had been found dead up-town. Embry gleans later that she'd died of exposure on the steps of their family home, too drunk to make it inside.

Jared doesn't drink. Embry doesn't ask.

Kim knows that Mrs Cameron is dead, though Embry wonders how much she really knows. Regardless, she's well aware of Jared's abstinence - hell, the whole pack is - and she doesn't push it. In her defence, she's more responsible than him and Jared combined, a fact Embry reiterates as he hands the cash over to the clerk. Jared only shrugs, his mind elsewhere, and they walk the dirt track to their house in silence. It's not for a lack of trying - Embry brings up the night at the gas station, the bonfire, his morning with Lex - but the quietness draws on. It's not until later, when he's alone in the garage with only his tools for company, that he truly considers how selfish he's been. Sure, Lex is totally redefining his reality, occupying every damn thought in his brain, but he hasn't paused for even a second to think about how his friends (no, his brothers) feel.

The shame washes over him like a bucket of ice water. Jared's been a constant in his life since they were in diapers, always up for a game of catch or a last-minute beach trip. Jacob and Quil and Embry may have been the inseparable trio, but it would be unfair to exclude Jared from the narrative. It's strange, looking back, how closely he's grown up with many of his pack siblings. The Rez is small, with maybe twenty kids per grade, and they were bound to connect at some point. Still, befriending the guys was as easy as breathing, a bond that became set in stone when they all phased. Rooming with Jared had only improved things; unsurprisingly, spending the bulk of your time with a person had a way of bringing you together. At the very least, he owes Jared a solid apology, though he suspects a muzzle may be a more appropriate peace offering.

Embry drags himself out of the garage, his feet steadily padding across the long grass that blankets their backyard. He's not sure if Jared's still around the house, but as he approaches the bungalow the familiar sounds of the Playstation grow in volume. The three of them had pooled their savings to buy a second-hand console the moment they moved into the new home, and he swears that Jared's hands are permanently grafted to the controller. Jared's head snaps up the moment Embry turns the doorknob, his expression a mixture of curiosity and irritation.

"Em, come do this match for me. I'm about to put this shit through the wall," he groans, carelessly tossing the controller in Embry's direction.

He snatches the projectile from the air, taking a seat beside his friend. Embry focuses his eyes forward on the game, though his head is elsewhere.

"Jared," he starts, gearing up for something heartfelt.

"Don't tell me you came in here to get all sappy," Jared says, shaking his head bemusedly. "You've got that constipated look again."

Embry frowns. "I was going to apologise for being an asshole, but I don't think I want to now," he grumbles, jerking the toggles roughly.

Jared's booming laugh drowns out the raucous soundtrack, his face the perfect picture of amusement. "Since when do we do apologies? I know what you're like, dude. Am I really meant to get annoyed that you never shut up about her? I'm happy for you, even if I have to witness your dreams in disgusting detail."

"Shit, what do you want me to do about that? I'd keep that to myself if I could," Embry mutters, his face flushing hot with embarrassment.

"You'll get there. I can keep most of my thoughts about Kim hidden now. I don't really care that much, though," he muses, a little lost in thought.

"Ugh. Do you know how hard it is to look her in the eye sometimes?"

"Does Lex know you're so squeamish?" he jokes, cackling at Embry's discomfort.

"Hey, by the time she actually kisses me, I'll be cured," he announces, shooting Jared a wink.

Jared responds only with a groan - probably directed more at his abysmal performance than his cheesy comments, though both things are pretty woeful. Embry hits pause on the controller, tossing it aside on the couch.

"You wanna mess around in the garage? Engine's a two-man job," he asks, his voice alight with hopefulness.

Jared hops to his feet in a flash, brushing the crumbs off his cut-offs. "I thought you'd never ask," he grins, leading the way.

Embry awakes the next morning with Lex tucked under his arm. He doesn't remember her crawling into his bed the night before - she alternates between the couch and his room, but she ends up beside him more often than not. He's grown used to having her in close proximity; he sleeps so much better with her nearby, knowing for certain that she's safe and well. She seems comfortable, too, settling into the routine of accompanying him back to the Rez daily. Things with her are pretty straightforward (for now, says the little voice in his head, though he tries to push that down as best as he can). Worries aside, he tries to take joy in the little things, like the way she leans against his truck as she waits for him after class, an adorable figure of beauty in her triple-layered cardigans and gumboots. She actually scoffs when he compliments her, too, which he finds kind of irritating. Still, he's more than grateful for her company, even if it includes her leaving her sopping socks on his bedroom floor.

Jared will surely call him creepy later, but he takes full advantage of her sleepiness to study her face in all its detail. The past few nights of rest have clearly helped; the ghostly pallor of her skin's dissipated, returning to her usual creamy complexion. He never really noticed the smattering of freckles across her nose until recently, or the way her eyes crinkle at the corners when she smiles. The more time he spends in her presence, the more he realises that he's an absolute goner. Imprint aside, he's head over heels for this girl, the very one that's curled up around him wearing one of his old sweatshirts. Life is strange, he thinks, as he considers whether to chance his luck with some sort of affectionate gesture. She stirs a little, stretching slightly before nuzzling further into his body, and it's like a little sign from the universe to just try.

Slowly, deliberately, he cranes his neck until his breath fans across her cheek, her soft lips entincingly close. The thought of kissing her pervades every thought - both waking and in his dreams - and for the briefest moment he imagines lowering his mouth to hers, envisioning the delicious motion of her against him. Embry forces himself to look away. Breathe in. Breathe out. Don't even think about that. She's salvation and temptation all in one, and he's all too aware that one wrong move will send her running. Mercifully, sanity prevails, if only at the behest of imaginary Old Quil scolding his impatience, significantly quelling his desire. Old Quil is a blessing both to the tribe and to Embry's involuntary chastity.

Instead, he presses a light kiss against her cheek, revelling in the smoothness of her skin. She emits a little hum of pleasure at the contact, drawing him in closer, and all he can think is it should be illegal to be this happy. He lowers his nose to her hair, peppering light kisses to her bedraggled mop.

"Good morning," he murmurs, taking in her scent. She's all vanilla and cinnamon, enticing and distinctive, so identifiably Lex. Some days he feels like a glorified sniffer dog, but this is one of the rare occasions that he's actually grateful for his heightened senses.

Her eyelids twitch a couple of times, sending her eyelashes fluttering against her cheeks, before finally opening to look at him. It's a strange look, a mixture of uncertainty and sleep-addled confusion, and for a second she's frozen, as immobile as a prey animal in the spotlight. He freezes too, overtaken by concern at her hesitation.

"Lex...it's only me. You're okay," he murmurs, pulling back a little to give her some space.

She shakes her head slightly, her eyes softening. Her face is still a little pinched, but he can feel her muscles relaxing with each breath.

"I'm sorry," she mutters, closing her eyes for a long moment. "Just kind of forgot where I was."

"It's okay. You don't need to be sorry. I was just worried," he says, raising his hand to gently stroke her hair.

"That's a bit unfair," she says, wrinkling her nose. At his confused expression, she elaborates. "You're making me too calm. How am I supposed to be grumpy?"

Embry chuckles, pulling on one of her loose locks. "That's the point, fool. Anyway, we actually need to get going. Emily's got some wedding stuff she wants to go over today."

Lex lets out a low groan, covering her face with her hands. "Surely we don't need to be there, right? How much is there to say about a wedding?"

"It's next weekend! I'm pretty sure rehearsals are mandatory, or something. I've never been to a wedding," he confesses, laughing a little at her horror-struck expression. "It won't be that bad. Just a little run-down and then some food. There's always food at Emily's."

"Fine," she moans, rolling out of bed. "I'll be good. Just know I'm only there for the food."

He rolls his eyes in jest, plainly enjoying her annoyance. "Yes, boss. Do I have to bribe you with coffee, too?"

"Well, if you're offering," she sing-songs, shooting him a cheeky grin.

He hums in pretend thought. "I think we could make a deal. I make you a coffee, you give me something in return."

She cocks her head, clearly confused. "What kind of exchange are you suggesting?"

"Well, I feel like it's only fair to acknowledge the effort," he starts, grinning as she cuts him off with a scoff. "So if you give me a little kiss, right here," he taps his cheek, "then I can get that right out for you."

Lex rolls her eyes, but doesn't bother to hide her grin. "This is such a scam! I didn't even have a chance to grab my stilts."

"Ouch, McKinley, I'm not that freakishly big."

"First off, never call me that again. Second, you're an actual giant. No normal person is seven freaking feet tall. I'm still not convinced you're not on steroids," she teases, poking his bicep (okay, she's right, he is weirdly large).

"Fine," he huffs, bending over until their faces are level. "Now, my kiss?"

He has to admit it's pretty unfair that he can hear her heartbeat, or more accurately, the way her heart begins to race as she leans closer to him. Knowing he has that effect on her is the sweetest reassurance, as well as a pleasurable little ego boost. It's almost as pleasurable as the light press of her lips to his cheek; if a kiss on the cheek has him on the verge of combustion, how is he going to survive an actual, non-virginal kiss? It's surely a question for Jared, if he can manage to restrain his laughter.

Embry knows two things for sure: one, that she's actually growing to like him, and two, that he's about to be interrogated beyond belief at the pack meeting. Still, with her by his side, it's not too bad.

"Em?" she says, pulling him back to reality.

"Hm?"

"The coffee, dork. Get to it."

A/N: Little bit shorter than usual, but life's gotten in the way lately and I haven't had as much time to write. Fingers crossed that next week will be better. I just want to take a quick moment to thank everyone who has reviewed - your comments make my day and are very motivating. Special thanks to WriteAndDream23 and .2020 for your consistency - I deeply appreciate it. See y'all next week!