"Call right now and get a second pair absolutely free!"
Shayera Hol grumbled to herself in exasperation, angrily grabbing the high-tech universal remote, a 'because you need it' gift from Batman, that controlled everything within the room in the Watchtower, and turned off the TV. It had been three weeks since the Justice Lords went their separate ways for a forced month of 'vacation' after the events that took place and it had been two weeks and six days since she had begun to lose her mind. Shayera was bored. Her first day free of the Justice Lords had been enjoyable. She had been able to catch up on what seemed like a decade of sleep and had read the book she constantly saw in the hands of human civilians, but it wasn't long before the novelty of her freedom began to wear off with boredom quickly taking its place.
Shayera hated boredom. It meant she had nothing to distract her from the thoughts she fought so hard to keep away.
The Flash was dead, gone forever.
J'onn had tried to act like a grief counselor to aid the team in their acceptance of his death but she had never been one to share her feelings. Shayera had easily manipulated the martian into believing she had not only accepted the tragedy but moved on as well. Truthfully, she had been surprised Batman made the therapy session mandatory. It had been destined from the start to be nothing but useless. She preferred to push through the Flash's death on her own, even if it meant turning to infomercials for distraction, silently dreading the day she returned to work where he would no longer be waiting to bug her with his never ending persistence and boyish disposition. She wished she could say they had been best friends but the truth was Shayera had never been good with relationships of any kind.
A sudden knocking on her door broke her from her somber thoughts and Shayera immediately went on alert, angling her position on her bed to better hear who was lurking outside. She detected a barely perceptible shuffling of heavy feet, 'Boots,' she thought to herself, and a muffled male voice. Slowly she moved off the bed, swiftly moving across the room to the door. She paused as she sighed.
"Hawkgirl, I can hear you on the other side. Can you just let me in?" The gruff and slightly impatient voice of John Stewart filtered through the door.
Shayera rolled her eyes, opening the door to reveal him carrying a large pizza. The cheesy smell was intoxicating, her last meal having been more than twelve hours before.
"You brought food, smart," she said, taking the cardboard box off his hands.
He greeted her with a smirk. "I figured you were probably hungry."
"So what's with the unannounced visit?"
"Oh, you know," he replied nonchalantly, walking into her room, needing no invitation.
Shayera looked over her shoulder at him, "I do?"
"You seem rather antsy. I'm surprised you haven't gone back down there despite what Batman told us," He said as he sat on the end of the bed.
"You changed the subject," she returned his smirk and sat next to him. "But yes I am getting rather fidgety up here."
They spent the rest of the evening polishing off the pizza, talking about nothing in particular. John told her of his unsuccessful attempt to enjoy his vacation before finally giving up and returning to Oa after less than a week for an off world mission. She told him of the evening she spent with Batman and Superman in an attempt to break free of her boredom. She had gone to help with their improvement of the weapons system in the Watchtower. Shayera felt more at ease with John than she had during her entire three weeks off. She hadn't realized how much she missed the company of the man sitting next to her.
"How have you been holding up?"
"What?" His question had caught her off guard, a rare thing for her.
"You know what I mean Hawkgirl," he said softly.
"I've been fine," she responded. It came out a little too coolly and she saw the disbelief on John's face. She should have known better than to lie to him. He was beginning to know her too well to fall for her poker face.
"Okay, I'll pretend I believe that for now, but just know I'm here if you need me," he responded sincerely.
Shayera actually felt guilty for lying to him. She was used to manipulating without a second thought yet she always found it incredibly difficult to deceive John. She felt the hot pangs of remorse begin to flare in the pit of her stomach.
A few silent minutes passed before Shayera reluctantly relented. John had always been so open with her. Now it was her turn.
"I'm not fine, not even close," she began, staring at floor, unable to meet his eyes. "He's always been there. He was there when we started. When J'onn brought us all together," she added. "He supported our decisions but I never took the time to show my appreciation and get to really know him. Now he's gone and that could just as easily been any one of us." Shayera took a deep breath, shuddering slightly. "It could have been you." There was a moment of tense silence that filled her, making it difficult to breathe. She couldn't remember the last time she had been so rattled.
"Hawkgirl, look at me."
Slowly she raised her head to look at John She felt ashamed for letting a single person's life get to her. Shayera was a trained soldier; she was used to death. But not of innocent people I know, she thought in an effort to rationalize her emotions.
John brushed a thumb along her cheekbone, just under her helmet, as he cradled the side of her face in his hand. "I'm not going to promise you that I'm not going anywhere but I want you to know I'm not going to leave you without a fight."
Shayera let out a small laugh. The way they fought meant it would be one hell of a fight.
"This is the life we chose for ourselves. Flash's death is probably not going to be the last one but we need to deal with it, learn from it. He wouldn't have wanted his death to break you or any of us."
"I know that. I just feel as if we were all dangling from the edge of a cliff. I was so angry over being put in that position and now there's nothing for me to take that anger out on."
"I trust you to help me through this so I need you to trust me that I can help you."
"You won't always be there to help or save me," she quietly replied. "And I can't promise that I can always be there to help or save you."
"The important thing," he continued, "is that we're here now. We shouldn't waste it Hawkgirl."
Shayera felt a wave of nervous excitement at the 'we' in his response. She swallowed and paused before she spoke, "Shayera."
"What?" Though she could tell by his tone it was out of shock more than confusion.
"My name's Shayera Hol. You don't have to call me Hawkgirl." Only John would be the one to bring some of her iron walls down.
John continued to rub his thumb across her cheekbone as he held her face. Shayera couldn't help but stare at him, unable to properly read his expression. She was an expert at reading people, including John, but for the first time she couldn't fathom his expression.
Suddenly he took her helmet in both of his hands and began to lift it off her head. Shayera was powerless, or rather unwilling, to do anything about this but respond by tilting her head downward as he pulled it off of her. Then, as suddenly as he had removed her helmet, John was kissing her.
Shayera hadn't kissed many in her life but she had never felt the strange combination of euphoria and fear she felt when John kissed her. It was gentle, passionate, and so right that she never wanted it to end but it did as they both ran out of air and had to break apart.
"Well that was...unexpected," John said. "I didn't know you had green eyes."
Shayera gave him with a smile in response. It was one of the few she had given in her life that sprouted from genuine happiness. Shayera certainly was not healed from the events of the past few weeks but she knew she had John by her side and for her that was more than enough to make her happy and make the grieving process bearable.
"What would you say to me asking if you wanted to spend the rest of the night with me?" Shayera asked with a smirk as she pushed him down onto the bed.
John returned the smirk as she climbed on top of him and he wrapped his arms around her, "I think we have plenty of vacation time left."
A/N: To answer some questions in the reviews since I forgot to do so last time.
I do believe that the Thanagarian Invasion did occur in the Justice Lords' universe. I also believe that they eventually got their power back and broke free from whatever prison was holding them. Remember it was called a Power Disruptor not a Power Remover. Though unlike the Shayera in the League's universe this Shayera betrayed the Thanagarians before they even landed on Earth. So the Invasion was short lived and didn't last nearly as long as the one in the Justice League's universe. The end result being in Hro's death by Shayera herself, proving her loyalty to Superman and the Justice Lords. Though the Justice Lords are outlaws in their universe so even helping stop the Thanagarian Invasion doesn't magically make them heroes again nor will they ever be heroes no matter what they do. With the Justice League not their to stop them I believe the Justice Lords eventually took control of their world again and ruled it with an iron fist.
The Lords' version of Shayera and John I think would be more compelled to get together over the Flash's death by trying to help each other cope with the loss. And yes I don't think they were as private about it as the League's John and Shayera were.
I'm guessing the Justice Lords were operating for about two or three years when their Flash was killed. I think it's about another year before the Justice Lords introduce themselves to the Justice League.
For me I think the timeline goes Wild Cards, Comfort and Joy, and then Starcrossed. I think there was at least 2 months between Wild Cards and Comfort and Joy and another 6-8 months in between Comfort and Joy and Starcrossed. I don't think John and Shayera dated for like two months and were that madly in love with each other to the point that Shayera would willing betray Hro for John. That type of love is developed over the course of months of dating and getting to know each other. Plus John seemed really blown away and deeply hurt by the revelation of Hro and Shayera's relationship. Had the two only been together for a few months it wouldn't have stung as much I think.