This chapter's a rather long one, I think you will like it. Took me a long while to figure out how I wanted everything to play out, but I'm pretty happy with it.
Since last chapter I've spent a month sick, wrote on some other stories, fell in love with Yuri on Ice... I had to take a break from uni but it's good to be back again, even if I have an ungodly amount of academic papers in English to read. But! After this course is done, I only have two semesters of law school left! Which is why I'll be making my escape to Japan in July:3 Very excited! It's always good to procrastinate writing your thesis, isn't it... haha!
As always, I want to thank everyone for giving me such lovely feedback and encouragement. I'm going to do my best to make the coming chapters exciting!
Speaking of reviews, I've been getting a couple of them in Spanish lately, and I just want to let you know that it's totally fine if you want to review in Spanish or French instead of English. I'm not good enough to answer in anything but English, but if you worry about your English level or just want to talk to me in your own language, go ahead! :3
Chapter 34: When I'm with you
xxx
Sasuke was in the kitchen, keeping his distance to everyone else. It was hard, but his experience as a ninja was at least good for something since so far the kids had seemed content with ignoring him. Naruto on the other hand was everywhere, pretty much, running around fetching food and helping to feed the kids and whatever and– oh wait, there were actually two of him. Deciding that it was really too early in the morning for dealing with that, Sasuke concentrated on his bowl of rice with fried egg. There was a tomato on the counter next to him that Naruto had thrown at him upon entering the kitchen, telling him to hold on to it since it was the last one.
It was a nice gesture, he supposed, and he may or may not have allowed Naruto a couple of kisses as they prepared things for Iruka. Naruto was, unsurprisingly, not allowed to cook anything on his own.
As he tuned out the loud chatter going on around him he also tried his best to pretend he hadn't woken up locked in Naruto's arms. He'd been forced to perform a body replacement technique with a pillow since the idiot refused to let go of him. Once he'd exited the bathroom again, Naruto had been awake and pouting at him, mumbling things that Sasuke didn't care about (but they were clearly about how Naruto had missed out on waking up together with Sasuke).
"Yikes, you look like that egg insulted your face."
Barely glancing up, Sasuke merely took a small step to the side as Naruto bumped hips with him. Naturally, Naruto followed until they were hip to hip and arm to arm again – even foot to foot.
"Ever heard of personal space, moron?" he muttered, but even he could tell there was no strength behind the words.
"Ever tried being nice in the morning?"
The counter Sasuke had chosen to lean against was further into the kitchen, the table filled with kids still in clear view but the distance at least provided some privacy for conversation.
"I haven't killed anyone, have I?"
He met Naruto's eyes, pleased when the other was gaping at him.
"You made a joke."
"It's possible."
"It wasn't even a good joke." Naruto's eyebrows were knitted together, but his lips were twitching like he was trying hard not to laugh. "There are children here. Besides, you would never kill someone from being in a shitty mood."
"You don't know that," Sasuke countered, feeling a tension he hadn't even noticed drain from his shoulders. "Now shut up and eat your breakfast."
Naruto rolled his eyes but dug into his own bowl, for once not bothering to argue. At least it was the real Naruto, his clone over by the table helping Iruka with some tiny kid who kept trying to throw food at the others. Sadly it only took a couple of minutes for Naruto to finish eating, even after refilling the bowl once.
"So, I'm helping out with the kids today, wanna join in?"
Shrugging, Sasuke picked up his tomato and considered if he should slice it before eating or not.
"I guess I can survive watching you get ordered around by a bunch of kids."
"They're not-!" Naruto lowered his voice, leaning in closer to hiss at him. "They're not ordering me around, okay? They love me. I'm the coolest person they know!"
Raising an eyebrow, knowing full well that Naruto had watched his clone suffer a bowl of miso soup to the head a minute earlier, Sasuke took a delicate bite of his tomato. It was a good one, not too soft with a fresh taste. A drop of juice ran down his thumb and he licked it up, catching Naruto staring at him with an odd look.
"What?" he asked, taking another bite as Naruto shook his head with closed eyes, a frustrated expression on his face afterwards.
"Do you have to eat it like that?" he asked, a hint of pain in his voice, one hand waving at Sasuke's tomato.
"Well I can't exactly swallow it in one go," Sasuke replied, sucking a little on the opening he'd created to prevent more juice from spilling out.
For some reason Naruto sucked in a breath, then grabbed both their bowls with a suspiciously red face.
"I'll just go wash these," he said, turning on his heel and marching off towards the sink.
Sasuke stared after him for a second, wondering if this strange behavior was cause for concern or not, though he soon decided that the tomato was more important. Naruto acting strange wasn't anything new after all, and after last night he had decided that he was better off not asking.
Soon enough they were outside with the kids, one Naruto-clone pushing the small one who threw soup on one of the swings, another trying to wrestle a girl with the same red hair as the small one in order to stop her from climbing the building.
"I won't fall I promise!" she yelled, until the clone put her in a secure hold before jumping up on the roof, which made her angry yells instantly turn delighted instead.
"You're spoiling them," Sasuke commented, leaning against the wall of a small tool shed. "What was that about them not ordering you around?"
Naruto was rubbing his hands against the cold wind, having spent the past minutes cursing the sudden change in temperature. Hearing Sasuke's words he punched his arm, then immediately grabbed onto it for warmth.
"I should have put on a sweater," he whined, huddling a little closer. "I thought it would be warm since it's sunny!"
"Weren't you listening to Iruka earlier? He told you to make sure the kids dressed warm since there's a cold front coming in this week."
"Well yeah but they're kids. And like, days ago it was too warm for sweaters!"
"Just go and get one, dobe."
"I'm fine!"
Naruto was still holding onto his arm, with both hands now. It was probably because he was standing still, since his clones didn't seem to have any problems.
"You're holding my arm."
As if to further prove his point, Naruto moved even closer and leaned his cheek on Sasuke's shoulder, rubbing his nose into the chuunin vest he wore.
"But you're so nice and warm, Sasuke!"
Blue eyes stared up at him innocently, and Sasuke felt no guilt as he kicked the idiot off.
"Sweater," he deadpanned, leaving no room for discussion.
Dejected, Naruto dragged his feet towards the front of the house, mumbling to himself along the way. Sasuke caught himself rubbing his arm where Naruto's hands had been, feeling cold all of a sudden. Pushing the thought away he swept his eyes over the garden slash playground again. One clone had taken what looked to be the three oldest kids for a run, while another played some sort of game with two girls who seemed more interested in arguing with each other than pay attention to the game.
He was only granted about three minutes of peace before a loud voice carried over from the other side of the house.
"Sasukeeeeeee! Get over here!"
Sighing, he refrained from pinching his nose and settled for an accusing look up towards the empty sky. This mission couldn't start fast enough.
When he rounded the corner of the building he stopped short, one foot hovering awkwardly in the air. Naruto was having an animated conversation with his mother, holding a large paper bag in his arms that made waving his hands around difficult. No matter how much he told his body to move, to walk over like it was nothing, he found himself unable to do so. A lump was forming in his throat, and he should be used to this now.
It didn't help that he hadn't been entirely honest last night, either. Sure, he'd thought about kissing Naruto, but it wasn't the only scenario running through his mind. Seeing Naruto talking to his mother reminded him of things he simply couldn't have, a future reality his hands could never reach.
Slowly putting his foot down on the ground, attempting to steady himself, Sasuke swallowed the lump along with everything that had happened yesterday. If he allowed those thoughts to float to the surface in daylight, if he saw possibilities in these everyday moments…
"Oi, bastard! Don't just stand there staring!"
Naruto was waving at him, the bag pressed securely against his chest, and Mikoto's smile was sweet.
He wavered. For no reason at all, he felt himself faltering, fumbling for the cracked pieces of his armor to shove them back together. Naruto seemed to notice, of course he did, because he placed the bag on the ground and walked over with a frown on his face.
"Sasuke?"
Oh, how he hated emotions! When they struck him all sudden and unforgiving, not caring about his efforts to keep them in control, like a silent blade twisting between his shoulders until everything came pouring out.
He vaguely noticed Naruto grabbing his hands before warmth flooded his chakra paths, shivers running down his spine as his body relaxed in stages. It left him feeling tired, as well as angry with himself.
"I'm okay," he muttered, avoiding Naruto's eyes and shaking him off.
Naruto didn't say anything, for which he was grateful since he wouldn't know how to explain himself. Orochimaru had told him he would be feeling emotions easier, but nothing about this was easy. In fact, easy had been shutting off, wrapping himself up in darkness until the shadows dancing in the corners of his eyes had become familiar. And then Naruto just had to exist, and they just had to end up here, and frankly Sasuke was tired of living in this dreamlike place.
The other half of the truth was that he never wanted to leave, and every time he was reminded of that fact he could feel something cold squeeze uncomfortably around his heart.
Doing his best to push all thoughts away, he walked over to Mikoto. Upon closer inspection she looked a little strained as well, but her smile was genuine as she leaned in for half a hug.
"Good morning," he said, fending off any questions before she could manage to ask them. "What's in the bag?"
"Some of the clothes are already finished!" Naruto exclaimed, lifting the bag up again and opening it for Sasuke to peek inside.
"Just the everyday wear," Mikoto added, Naruto nodding several times in confirmation. "The rest should be done by tonight."
"I see."
"Oh, and before I forget." Mikoto reached under her shirt to reveal a folded paper. "The mission details from Fugaku. You remember when and where to meet, right?"
Sasuke nodded, accepting the paper from her. It felt heavy in his hand, edges sharp somehow.
"I'll come by later with the rest of the clothes, alright?"
With another smile and a small wave she left, passing through the gate just as one of the Naruto clones completed a lap with the kids in tow.
"Hello, Mikoto-san!" they all said politely as they ran past, and the girl Sasuke had a vague memory of being the oldest waved at them as well.
"Okay kids, we're picking up the pace!" the clone yelled, clapping his hands before going a little faster.
"We're still going slow as hell!" one of the boys yelled back, sticking his tongue out when Naruto (the real one) indignantly shouted "Language, Mitsuru!" at him.
Sasuke recognized him as the kid that had knocked on their door and called him 'Naruto's guy', and figured he was the troublemaker type.
"That kid, I swear, no respect," Naruto muttered next to him, and Sasuke, fairly sure he deserved it, reached out to slap the back of his head. "What was that for?!"
"I'm going inside to read this," Sasuke said instead of answering the question, the paper crumpling slightly as he turned towards the door.
"Huh? Can't you just read it out here?"
His deadpan glare at least managed to make Naruto blush a little, but sadly the other supposed ninja followed him inside. Not bothering with slippers he headed into the living room, a small struggle ensuing when Naruto wanted to read the instructions too.
One foot holding the idiot in place on the floor, Sasuke unfolded the note and scanned the contents.
Mission destination: Land of Tea, north-west border area
Mission base: Kakunodate village, Fire country
Mission 1
Mission type: Capturing of missing nin
Description: Reported sightings of Suna-affiliated missing nin Kazunari. Capture alive and bring back to Konoha's prison. Beware of his sand techniques.
Mission 2
Mission type: Information gathering/reconnaissance
Description: Strange chakra signatures have been reported along the border. Three attacks confirmed. Unidentified attackers. No casualties. Investigate the identity and purpose of the attackers if possible.
Assigned ninja:
Uchiha Fugaku (team leader)
Uchiha Naori
Uchiha Sasuke
Uzumaki Menma
To Sasuke: As you can see an extra mission has been added. While on the mission, pay special attention to Menma. I will explain more later. Burn this after reading it.
Fugaku
"Dammit, Sasuke! What does it say?"
Not sure of what to say, Sasuke lifted his foot and wordlessly handed Naruto the document with instructions. He sat down on one sofa, pinching the bridge of his nose and glaring at nothing in particular. Of course it couldn't just be a simple mission. Thoughts racing, he glanced down at Naruto's face, several emotions flickering across it as he read.
"I knew there was something weird about that guy," he muttered, finally sitting up and crossing his legs. "And he'll explain later? This smells weird."
"It smells like they've been keeping things from us," Sasuke agreed, motioning for Naruto to hold the paper up as he went through the hand signs for his fire technique. "We've been careless."
Naruto barely flinched when the paper caught on fire, holding it by one corner and shaking his fingers to put the flames out just before they could burn his fingers. He rolled the remaining little piece into a ball, then threw it at Sasuke's forehead.
Puffing out a final breath of fire, Sasuke burned the rolled-up corner into dust before it could hit its target.
"Well, what were we supposed to do? We're at their mercy, aren't we? I don't sense any ill intent from them so I wouldn't worry so much if I were you."
"You say you know there's something weird about Menma but no one is giving off anything bad?"
"Oh, shut up. I was pretty sure I just don't like him because he creeps me out."
"Hmm."
Folding his hands, Sasuke frowned as he collected his thoughts.
"Let's go through what we know so far. We end up here through some kind of teleportation, but we don't know who did it. Who do we know with the amount of chakra to pull it off?"
"Uh, I guess Menma? Well, my mom has half of Kurama so maybe both together? But what about Obito! He knows how to teleport!"
"Yes, but why bring us here? Kaguya could be involved, too, and we have no idea what she wants."
Naruto grabbed his knees, pulling his legs up so he could knock them back and forth as he chewed his lips in thought.
"So like, we don't know if the good side or the bad side got us here."
"If there is a good and bad side," Sasuke pointed out. "Besides, for all we know this could be some elaborate genjutsu."
"Ugh," Naruto groaned, leaning his chin on one knee. "How about I hit you and we see if you wake up, then?"
"Very funny. I guess it doesn't matter if this is a real world or not, the problem is still there."
"And the problem is?"
Sasuke kicked Naruto's shin, rolling his eyes when Naruto pouted in mock pain.
"Fiiiine," Naruto drawled, stretching his legs out instead and poking Sasuke's toes with his own. "I just hate this whole 'waiting around' thing, and I still don't like that you're going on that mission. Especially after reading that."
"You know," Sasuke started carefully, scrutinizing Naruto's face to judge his reaction. "We could be right where the enemy wants us to be. How do we know Konoha isn't behind this somehow? They know about you from last time you were here. As peaceful as it seems, we don't know anything about what the rest of the world looks like outside these walls."
Blinking at him, Naruto left his toes on top of Sasuke's, pressing down a little. It felt nice, even if Sasuke would never admit it out loud.
"Honestly? I don't want to think about it. I just end up feeling like absolute shit every time I do. Can't we just, I don't know, pretend for just one day that things are normal?"
It was Sasuke's turn to blink at Naruto, taking in the barely there tremble in his lips, the way his fingers clenched around the fabric of his pants.
"Pretend we're not in a different dimension?"
Naruto nodded, looking at their feet instead of meeting his eyes.
"Pretend it's perfectly normal for us to sit in the living room of Iruka's orphanage, getting clothes handed to us by my mother?"
"I know, I know, okay?" Naruto ducked his head, sliding his hands down his thighs to grip underneath his knees instead. "It's super weird. Nothing is normal, I know. Sometimes I can forget but then I'm reminded again and I just, I feel like there's a hole in my chest because we could have had this, couldn't we? I kind of wish it's a genjutsu because if this place is real and we go back-"
He stopped, sucking in a breath before slowly letting it out again, shoulders moving with it.
Feeling uneasy, Sasuke was glad he'd stopped on his own. As much as he had told Naruto that of course he was going back with him, he knew he wasn't putting much effort into figuring things out in order to do so. Not as much as he should, at least. Then again, where would they even start? They really did know nothing, apart from the fact that Kaguya was somehow involved, and Menma was the only 'weird' person around…
"Hey, why is Menma called Menma and not Naruto? Everyone else is the same, or don't exist in our world."
"Who knows?" Naruto shrugged, clenching and unclenching his fingers. "I hate Menma. Eating it, I mean. I even complained about it before I ended up here last time. And the other Sakura wasn't in the village last time, either."
"Right. It's annoying that we can't ask Obito about it, he would at least be able to tell us where this world came from."
"I bet he could get us home, too."
Falling silent for a while, Sasuke allowed himself to wonder what things were like, back in their own Konoha. They'd been gone for long enough now that surely people were getting worried. Would it occur to them that they were here, in this alternate dimension that Obito had somehow reached? Or had they simply decided that Sasuke kidnapped Naruto because he was evil like that… The thought brought a rueful little smile to his lips, Naruto's toes still keeping his warm.
"Do you think everything's okay at home? I bet Sakura-chan and Baa-chan are really worried."
"I'm sure they think it's all my fault," Sasuke said lightly, leaning back into the couch with a sigh. "And I'm sure Tsunade is cursing you for keeping her at work even longer."
"What do you mean?" Naruto switched to sitting on his knees, leaning against Sasuke's legs to peer up at him. "It's not like they were going to make me Hokage on my birthday or something."
Freezing, Sasuke took a moment to backtrack that thought. It wasn't something he'd given much thought because he preferred not thinking about what things would be like when Naruto became Hokage, but people had been talking for weeks before Naruto's birthday and most of them seemed to expect an announcement of some sort. Maybe not to make him Hokage right away, but soon enough it would happen, whether he liked it or not.
"No, probably not. You're still way too dumb for that."
"Bastard!" Naruto's fist connected painfully with his arm, and he suppressed the urge to rub it. "I could so totally become Hokage right now!"
"Not when you talk like a baby."
Instead of the expected anger, Naruto groaned and face-planted into Sasuke's leg.
"It's going to be hell to come back," he mumbled, surprising Sasuke. "Kind of makes me want to stay here."
"It's not going to be hell," he argued, though it sounded weak. "Try and focus on the present instead."
"Don't wanna," Naruto whined, wriggling around a bit and rubbing his face into Sasuke's pant leg. "Can't we just stay in bed for like, a week?"
"And do what, exactly?" he asked, tone as dry as the small pile of ashes on the floor.
"Um," Naruto said intelligibly, picking at Sasuke's right sock. "Sleep?"
Heaving a sigh, Sasuke combed his fingers through Naruto's hair, ignoring the noises of complaint when he tugged at a knot.
"We still need to talk about our options," he said, tilting Naruto's face towards him when he tried to hide it.
"You're ripping my hair off," Naruto whined, but made no move to get out of his hold. "And since when are you so interested in talking, huh? You hate talking."
"I hate going into things blindly even more."
"Wow, I think that's the most hypocritical thing I've ever heard you say."
"I'm surprised you even know what that words means."
"Teme."
"Dobe."
"Can I kiss you?"
Sasuke frowned, holding Naruto at a distance when he tried to move closer.
"No? We're not done yet."
"I'm done," the idiot argued, pushing his hand off and crawling into his lap with a smug grin. "And I've decided we're going to kiss instead."
To his great embarrassment, Sasuke only managed a small noise of objection before Naruto's lips on his mouth and Naruto's hands in his hair and Naruto's thighs clenching around his hips somehow managed to render him completely useless.
He would deny that it was nicer than trying to deal with the upcoming mission, but it was sort of difficult when his brain didn't function anymore. He didn't even realize his hands had found purchase in Naruto's shirt by the small of his back until he pulled him closer, Naruto humming happily in response. Then Naruto's hands slid down to his cheek, mouths separating as his head was forcefully tilted backwards. He felt the faintest brush of lips along his neck, the hot breath washing over his apparently sensitive skin causing him to shudder. It was all he could do not to grab Naruto's head and smash it against his neck, holding his breath in shock for a second at the thought.
A second was all he got, however, before a throat cleared awkwardly.
"Sorry for interrupting, but I'm not sure this is the right time or place for that sort of thing."
Iruka didn't look angry, but Sasuke was mortified. Appalled, even, at his own lack of control.
"We're so sorry!" Naruto shouted, shooting up from Sasuke's lap, red all the way to his ears. "We'll go back to work right away!"
"Alright, you do that," Iruka said, lips twitching into an amused smile that, somehow, made Sasuke feel even worse about the whole situation.
His fingers itched with the desire to throw Naruto as far away as possible.
His lips, however, had a different idea entirely.
xxx
Sasuke didn't want to get out of bed. Technically he already was, since he was on Sakura's couch, but he stayed buried underneath layers of blankets even as the VHS player's digital clock blinked 11:30 at him. Moving was not an appealing thought right now. Every time his stomach growled he told himself it was too much effort, and eventually it gave up.
He wasn't happy about being awake. Sakura had left early morning for a shift at the hospital, working steadily towards her dream of becoming a great medic. She made having a dream so simple, and even though he knew her life had definitely had its rough patches, he couldn't help but feel jealous that she at least had found her calling in life.
What did Sasuke have? No skills whatsoever. The worst part was that he'd always dreamed of being recognized by his family, of being included, being trusted with important tasks.
Not like this.
Sakura was right about one thing though; he'd never told his family what Menma was to him. He'd covered up their closeness, kept up appearances by flirting with girls, and yet. They knew they'd been together, because they'd been spying on Menma. He should have known that something weird was going on when he kept being paired up with Menma for missions the past year, but he'd simply thought they noticed how they worked well together.
They think Menma is still being controlled… and still sent me off alone with him?
Groaning into his hands, he simply couldn't make sense of his parents' logic. There was no logic, really. Unless, they thought Menma had feelings for him, and would let his guard down around him. And well, he had, but not in a strange way. Just a way that made Sasuke think they had something – but it didn't matter now. Menma wasn't talking to him, and if his family thought he had some secrets to share, then they were sorely wrong. Sure, they had talked. Sure, he knew things about Menma that other people didn't.
But Menma having some kind of evil plan he kept hidden? That was just ridiculous.
And then! Naruto and the other Sasuke! What was he supposed to figure out that they simply couldn't ask them?!
He could feel a headache coming, and pulled the blankets over his head to block out the light. In the dark, he let himself think about Menma like he hadn't done since that day. The real Menma, not the cheerfully polite one in front of his parents, not the scoffing, superior one in front of their friends. Not the Menma that went through missions by careful calculation, but always lost his head in a fight.
No, he thought about the quiet Menma, the one who woke up at night to stare at the sky, the one who slept with a frown on his face that nothing Sasuke did could help smoothen out.
He thought about murmured conversations that were tucked away in the morning, Menma always listening, always holding him as tight as he needed.
Did Menma know what was going on? He never talked about the future, never told Sasuke what he thought of those times he stared at the stars with eyes far away. It had always intimidated him a bit, that there were clearly parts of Menma that Sasuke couldn't reach, thoughts and feelings that weren't to be shared. For his part, he probably shared too much. It was just easy, somehow. And look where that sharing had gotten him…
If he thought about it more closely, there were a lot of instances where things hadn't been precisely great between them. Menma liked to complain about things that Sasuke couldn't relate to, and he always felt inferior skill-wise. Even so, he'd thought the connection they shared during sex was enough, but apparently he'd read too much into it. Or rather, Menma must have realized he didn't actually need Sasuke for anything, and then he didn't have to pretend he cared anymore.
Well, if Menma wanted to sleep with Sai, then Sasuke didn't care at all. And if he wanted to be such an ass, then he could forget about Sasuke telling him about the village suspecting him of being a traitor of some sort. He was better off without him, anyway. He could find someone else, someone who actually cared for real.
Still, Menma's words had stung, because he knew his weaknesses and knew where to aim for maximum effect. In hindsight, Sasuke felt like everything he'd said was true. They never defined their relationship, never did things together in the public eye. And while Sasuke didn't sleep with anyone who asked anymore, it had been true for a while. It was how things started, after all.
A disastrous mission where they got separated from the others, a snarky comment from Menma (no wonder you messed up, all you do is sleep around), the angry retort from Sasuke (what, don't tell me you're angry because I'm not interested in you), escalating into a rather fantastic fight.
Of course, Sasuke didn't stand a chance when it came to a fight with fists, but the attraction had been clear as day and to Sasuke it felt like a victory. Nothing other than the fight happened that time, but Sasuke kept pushing and pushing, only because he wanted to rub it in Menma's face that he wasn't better than anyone else just because he claimed to not find Sasuke attractive.
Sasuke might not have much, but he did have his looks for good and for bad.
Though, now that he had met his alternate self, there was this feeling creeping up on him that he was merely a pretty face among many, whereas the other Sasuke…
Well, he was getting off track. But now that the other Sasuke had entered his thoughts, he started feeling even more pathetic. Would Sasuke wallow in bed because people thought he was weak? Unlikely. Whatever else there was to think about him, he had a drive that was almost frightening. If his mother and Naruto hadn't shown up, he was pretty sure they would have been at it until he passed out.
Which reminded him of the fact that he'd asked Sasuke to train him today as well.
Heaving a deep sigh, he slowly made his way into a sitting position, body stiff and sluggish. It would be worse the second day, but he also knew the best way to make it better would be to exercise a little. Emphasis on little. He was pretty sure that Sasuke didn't understand that concept.
On the other hand, if he worked himself to exhaustion today, too, then there would be less time and energy to think about all the things he didn't want to think about.
His stomach made a last, feeble attempt at gaining his attention, and with a deep breath, Sasuke headed for Sakura's kitchen.
An hour later he was outside, heading for the same training ground as yesterday. While he'd decided to get some training done, he wasn't so sure he wanted Sasuke to watch him. He'd had enough blows to his self esteem lately without a better version of himself telling him to redo the same move over and over again for the second day in a row.
Sadly he wasn't the only one outside, and he had to duck behind corners several times to avoid relatives and girls belonging to his fan club. He thought he could see Sai in the distance, and he caught himself before he could run over and cause a scene. It wasn't Sai's fault, and Sasuke wasn't – refused to be – that petty. He was moving on, yeah that was exactly it. Moving on and thinking only about himself for a while.
It was something Sakura had stressed last night, that he always let people run him over. Not the most encouraging thing to hear, but in the light of day it was easier to acknowledge things for what they were. He didn't want to be ordered around, didn't want his family to think he would accept just about anything – if only he could say it like the other Sasuke!
No one tells me what I can and can't do.
Reaching the training ground, he went through warm up exercises, trying to clear his mind while stretching. He kept coming back to that sentence though, replaying it inside his head until it sounded as if the other Sasuke stood right next to him. But how do you become a person no one dares give orders to? A person who can do whatever and get away with it… Wasn't that impossible?
I wasn't just the physical strength, he thought. There was more to the other Sasuke, his whole attitude, the way he carried himself, like confidence was ingrained into his very being. How could he even begin to try and reach a level like that?
Sitting down on the ground, he held onto his ankles and tried to decide what he should practice on instead. There were a lot of things he needed to improve, and when he'd stayed in the same position for several minutes, finding each idea less appealing than the last, it sort of dawned on him that he didn't even like training. It was a necessary evil, something he'd been forced to do for most of his life.
How do you become great at something you don't even like?
For a lovely minute, Sasuke contemplated quitting. Doing something else. Hanging out with people who weren't ninjas, who didn't care about ten different ways to throw a shuriken.
As nice as the thought was, it was anything but realistic.
…as my son you're also the son of our clan's leader…
The memory of his mother's words brought an unpleasant squeeze in his chest, reminding him that whatever he decided to do, he would always be lesser in comparison to Itachi, to Shisui, to the other ambitious members of their clan. He wasn't oblivious enough to not notice how people talked about him, talked to him, like he was still a small child. Someone who should be doing great things, should have great expectations on his shoulders.
But he wasn't, and he didn't. He wasn't next in line to lead the police force, was definitely not in the running for future Hokage. He probably wouldn't even make jounin, and the thought tasted bitter in his throat.
It was, eventually, this thought that made him get up again. Not even jounin, he mocked himself and gathered chakra underneath his shoes. You're nothing like him. Jumping into the air he closed his eyes, picturing the surrounding trees with his mind as he plucked a few shuriken from his weapon's pouch.
But if he wasn't like the other Sasuke, if he couldn't be the way his family wanted him to be, if the current him wasn't good for anything…
Then just who am I supposed to be?
xxx
Sasuke had barely said a word to him after that incident with Iruka, and Naruto had wisely not suggested Ichiraku's when they were handed some money and told to go eat somewhere else. Maybe Iruka thought Sasuke scared the kids, maybe he felt bad for catching them like that, either way dinner hadn't been much help in getting Sasuke to stop his silent treatment.
Though it wasn't as if Naruto was worried about that. Sasuke had a tendency to take things out on him when he felt uncomfortable, because usually it was Naruto's fault. And yeah, maybe making out in Iruka's living room hadn't been his best idea, but the only regret he had was getting caught. The smartest strategy should be to simply wait it out, until Sasuke either forgot about it or decided he'd been punished enough.
He'd spent dinner mostly thinking about anything that wasn't their talk earlier, their current situation, or the fact that Sasuke looked incredibly good even when annoyed.
Whenever the last thought slipped through he expected backlash from Kurama, but the fox seemed to be asleep. That, or he was building up for something better. Maybe he should start charging him rent.
Back at the orphanage, Iruka handed them a large cardboard box courtesy of Mikoto. Naruto had already switched into some of the clothes she'd left them in the morning, thankful that he didn't need to borrow Iruka's anymore. At least his jumpsuit was clean enough to wear again. Not that there was anything wrong with Iruka's clothes, but the pants were always a tad too long and it reminded him that even if he'd grown a bit the last year, he was still shorter than his old teacher.
Shorter than Sasuke, even if it was only by a couple centimeters.
"Wanna check them out?" he asked as they entered his room, a little hesitant in case Sasuke would rather just sleep his irritation off.
"Might as well," Sasuke sighed, and Naruto was relieved that the silence seemed to be over. "But as long as you didn't get me anything orange I don't think it matters."
Snorting, Naruto placed the box on top of the bed and eagerly tore it open.
"You have so little faith in me," he pouted, pulling out a pair of orange pants identical to the ones he already wore. "Maybe I should just pretend I got you these, huh?"
"It's bad enough you got them for yourself," Sasuke deadpanned.
Still, he sat down on the bed and waited for Naruto to continue.
"I got myself a black pair, too! If I have to go on a mission it's probably better to blend in a bit."
"What's that, actual logic? I'd be impressed if I thought you would actually wear them."
Scowling, Naruto made quick work of his pants before pulling on the dark pair. They were as comfortable as the ones he'd tried at the shop, ending just above his ankles. The biggest differences from his usual pants were that these tightened a bit from underneath his knees and down, and the pockets were deeper.
"You were saying?"
Sasuke shrugged, seemingly not very impressed. Maybe because Naruto still wore his jumpsuit jacket, and any combination with orange seemed to rub him the wrong way.
"When you told me about new outfits, I thought you'd do more than maybe wear differently colored pants."
"Shut up, my jumpsuit is great! I've saved the world in it, you know!"
"…right."
Sasuke might sound like he didn't care, but Naruto could see the hint of a smile on his face. It was enough encouragement to continue digging through the box at least, and he eagerly went for his favorite item.
"Ta-da!" he said, holding up the robe in front of Sasuke. It was dark red, short-sleeved and complete with black flames along the bottom hem. "Mikoto said no one really wears these anymore, but it looks just like the one I got from the frogs and Jiraiya, so I decided to get it!"
When Sasuke stared blank-faced at him, he pulled it on and struck a pose.
"It's cool, isn't it? It's fine, I know you want to say it!"
"You look ridiculous," Sasuke muttered with a roll of his eyes, turning towards the box. "Isn't there anything useful in here?"
"Hands off!" Naruto slapped Sasuke's hands away, pulling the box closer to himself. "I'll get to your stuff soon enough!"
Another eye roll, but Sasuke patiently crossed his legs on the bed and gave him an expectant (though kind of mocking) look. Setting the robe aside for now, Naruto picked up a couple long-sleeved shirts he'd gotten for himself. Two orange ones, one white at Mikoto's insistence, and all three had the Uzumaki swirl on the back.
"I wanted to get a mesh shirt like I usually wear, but these were actually more comfortable. The old geezer said something about how the fabric dries quickly so you don't get as sweaty."
"A white shirt?"
Sasuke looked baffled, and Naruto grinned at the sight. Unzipping his jacket he changed into the white shirt, frowning a little at how it clung to him like a second skin. Maybe it just needed stretching a bit.
"Well?" he asked, biting his lip when Sasuke stared at him like he'd grown a second head.
"It's too weird."
"What, me wearing black and white is weird?"
"Why would you even get a white shirt, that's idiotic."
"Hey, it was your mother's idea!"
When Sasuke's face scrunched up in doubt, Naruto refrained from telling him it was more that she'd joked about how white would be even more offensive in a fight since it told the other person he didn't even expect to get dirty. He'd thought it would be fun to challenge Menma in it, but pissing off Sasuke was good, too.
"I never thought I'd say this, but you should probably stick to orange."
Needless to say, Naruto was speechless. Was Sasuke sick? Did he really look that terrible in black and white? Sure, he hadn't really planned on wearing these clothes together, and there was a black one in there somewhere to match with the orange pants anyway.
"Wait, put on the robe," Sasuke continued, which was even stranger.
"Huh?"
"Just do it."
Doing as told, Naruto pulled on the robe, nervously patting it down as Sasuke spent a minute scrutinizing him from head to toe. Sasuke looked troubled, glaring at his chest as if it offended him somehow.
"You absolutely can't wear this together."
"Huh?!"
Nodding to himself, Sasuke pursed his lips.
"You heard me."
"The fuck? I'll wear what I want!"
"But you love orange."
Naruto was about to keep arguing, when something about the way Sasuke averted his eyes with clenched fists sent his heart into overdrive.
"Sasuke, do you, um, I mean, do I look good in this?"
"I just told you not to wear this, idiot."
But Sasuke's cheeks were colored a faint pink, and Naruto thought he might die from happiness. If Sasuke found him attractive, then he would gladly sacrifice orange. Well, maybe not every day. Then the effect might be lost, after all.
"Let's continue!" he happily chirped, pulling out a jacket similar to his old one. "What do you think about this one?"
"Good. Wear it."
Snickering, feeling oh so smug about Sasuke having a hard time meeting his eyes, Naruto threw it on the bed instead. Unlike his usual one, this one was orange from mid-chest and up as well as the arms. The cuffs and zipper were black, matching the part below the chest. He liked it because it was the same but reversed. It was good to switch things up once in a while, and Mikoto had argued that it would look better together with the orange pants. She also said that anything orange would look terrible with the robe, but he really didn't care.
He'd always thought 'the more color the better', but seeing Sasuke's reaction now, he might have to reconsider. And hadn't Sasuke had a similar reaction when seeing him in Iruka's non-orange clothes? He would have to explore this more later.
"That's most of my stuff, ready to see yours?"
He found his own black shirt, throwing it on top of the other discarded items. There was a piece of fabric separating the layers of what was his and what was Sasuke's, decorated with the shop's name in calligraphy. Carefully folding it before putting it aside, he wondered how fancy the place must be to bother with things like that. Everything was much more comfortable and form-fitting than he was used to, anyway.
"Pants!" he said, holding out one dark blue pair and one black towards Sasuke. "I know you'll probably wear the uniform a lot anyway, but Mikoto kind of insisted we got spares."
"I see," was all Sasuke said to that, inspecting the pants without further comment.
They were similar to Naruto's, but slightly longer and even tighter by the ankles. He hoped it was how Sasuke liked it, since he'd been wearing a similar style while away from the village.
"Got you lots of shirts, too." Returning to the box he picked them out one by one. "Dark blue, wine red, moss green, plum purple, aaaaand a baby blue one!"
Unsurprisingly, Sasuke glared death at him.
"I'm going to pretend you didn't just list off an entire color chart," he muttered, accepting all of them except the baby blue one. "And that last one you can get rid of."
"But Sasuke! You need more color in your life! Just wear it casually!"
He turned the shirt around, waving the backside at Sasuke where an Uchiha fan was beautifully stitched to the fabric.
"I think you'll look great in it." He nodded eagerly to emphasis his belief, but Sasuke was not convinced.
Instead of replying, Sasuke stood up and stripped to his boxers. Taken by surprise, Naruto didn't really have it in him to look away. All that tantalizing skin stretched taut over muscle… Oh, if only he could spend a day or two just touching him!
I try so hard not to listen to you, Kurama piped up. I should get paid for this. In fact, if I got a thousand ryo every time you thought about touching Sasuke I'd be able to buy a whole castle.
Then please go live in that castle and stop making fun of me! Naruto hissed back, sad when Sasuke's chest disappeared from view underneath the wine red shirt.
And damn, did he look good in it. Naruto shut his mouth with a snap, hoping he wasn't drooling. The way the color contrasted with his skin was just mouthwatering, but luckily Sasuke didn't seem to notice since he was busy moving around to test the clothes.
"I guess they'll do," he sighed, sitting back down.
Naruto had chosen shirts with a wide cut around the neck, the result being a great view of Sasuke's collarbones.
Maybe this was a mistake.
"There's more," he hurried to say, telling himself that he was not going to jump Sasuke.
It was just a shirt! And Sasuke looked good in anything, so it really shouldn't make him feel all feverish to see Sasuke wear clothes that he picked out, in a color he'd mostly chosen because why not but that was clearly too fitting.
Sasuke looked like he could snap your neck with a flick of his hand, which of course he could, but he'd never really looked like it before in all his weird outfits. And the standard outfit wasn't precisely flattering on anyone.
Swallowing down the half hysterical question of hey, turn on your Sharingan? Naruto escaped once more into the box, wondering if he needed to start questioning his own sanity. Maybe this alternate world was just slowly making him lose it.
For some reason, he could hear Kurama groan. But since he didn't say anything, he chalked it up to snoring or whatever.
"Mikoto insisted on getting you a haori, and then I got you a sweater."
The haori was lovely, really, made from fine fabric and colored a dark blue that could be mistaken for black in bad lighting. When Sasuke put it on, the loose sleeves reached just below his elbows. The ends reached around mid-thigh, a large Uchiha fan covering the back.
He looked… so Uchiha. Like the clan leader he actually was, considering he was pretty much the only one left. Obito didn't count, really.
It stole Naruto's breath away, seeing him like that. Sure, he was barefooted, standing in a bedroom with a frown on his face as he ran his hands along fabric, but it hurt to think that Sasuke was meant for so much more than what he'd been given in life.
Naruto wanted to give him that, wished with all his being that he could give back all he'd lost.
Closing the distance with slow steps, Naruto reached out to adjust the haori over Sasuke's shoulders. He left his hands on his collarbones, running his eyes over pale skin brought out by the red and blue surrounding it.
"It suits you," he murmured, daring to meet Sasuke's eyes this close.
"It's just clothes," Sasuke frowned, but allowed the closeness, the eye contact, breaths becoming synchronized.
Underneath his right hand, Naruto could feel not only Sasuke's steady heartbeat, but that second beat that kept them connected. It felt stronger like this, in the quiet filling the air between them. Everything else faded out of focus, until his body seemed to vibrate with Sasuke's presence.
He drew a shaky breath, heart heavy in his chest and beat loud in his ears, moving closer, closer, chests connecting as his hands slid up around Sasuke's neck. When their noses bumped he released the air again, falling into Sasuke, caught by strong arms around his waist.
Fire burned his veins, prickling hot, flames licking between their bodies. Did anything else in life really matter, if he could have Sasuke like this? If he could drown in his eyes, comb fingers through his hair like lovers did, drink in his heat like he was made of ice and desperate to melt.
"Naruto…"
He clenched his eyes shut, pulling Sasuke closer, cheek to cheek and heart to heart.
"You're everything to me," he whispered, feeling Sasuke's arms tighten in response. "Please, just, please promise you'll be careful."
Warmth washed over Naruto's cheek, the evidence of Sasuke's sigh. Then his mouth pressed against Naruto's ear, lips as soft as his words.
"I promise."
For you, I'll do anything.
Edit: The super wonderful snow124 drew this beautiful piece of art inspired by the last scene, please go check it out on Flickr: ww w .flickr (. com) photos/45305087 N02/30724429062/ or on tumblr: snow124-art. tumblr (. com) /post/152865571765/haori-by-snow124-it-hurt-to-think-that
Since ff doesn't like links, remember to delete the spaces in them and the () in the links. Aah I'm just so incredibly happy because her art is so beautiful and please go show her your love!
In the end, I settled for rather simple clothes for them. But I really wanted some color for Sasuke... One day I'll make him wear that baby blue shirt, just so Naruto can have some fun. Personally I really like Naruto's red sage robe, even if it looks bad with orange. If you're wondering what Sasuke was thinking when seeing Naruto wearing black and white, it was probably something along the lines of "shit, this really brings out his natural colors... I might go blind at this rate."
On a side note, wouldn't it be fun to have Naruto and Sasuke spar in white clothes and whoever has the cleanest ones at the end wins? It's something I'll imagine at least. Maybe it can rain while they do it, you know...
Anyway, the mission is coming up, and now we know a little bit more on what to expect! I do think I should update Wasn't expecting that next, and I'll be kinda busy all of November, but look forward to it!
By the way, I had to ask myself (and Nora) some pretty hard questions while writing this. Like, would they have VHS or DVD players? Do they really use cardboard boxes? Why haven't they invented more functional fabrics? Such a strange mix of feudal and modern Japan, this manga... oh well. Artistic freedom is my friend:p