Family Activities

"Hey," Lynn stared for a moment. "Hey Linc?"

"…yeah?" the younger sibling wheezed, half falling over in the kitchen to swallow down some nutritious mix Lynn had prepared (it tasted green).

The momentary respite born from spite of his own having faded to reveal that Lynn's exercises had turned his limbs to jelly. Now it was all that he could do after their second run of the day to not just collapse where he stood while his far fitter sister chugged her green drink like it was water.

"Is it just me or do my kids have handles now?" Lynn pointed to the girls currently playing near the dining table. Sure enough; Lynn's daughters were now clad in red onesies (a gift from Leni, who had made some for each child with a corresponding colour to their Loud mother, or to the preference of the banjo-free partners). Said onesies were warm, comfortable and added a plush softness that meant hugging the child within was even nicer than before (and provided a bit of padding if said hug became too tight due to a carried away adult).

They also came equipped with a layered canvas handle sticking out of the back.

"Oh right;" the man found his senses once more. "Leni added them to all the kids' onesies, that way while they're here we can handle them easier."

Lynn stared at him.

"It was my idea," he admitted. "I'm not apologising."

"Apologise?" Lynn shook her head and grinned. "No, this is brilliant!"

"I-it is?" Lincoln raised an eyebrow, surprised that Lynn wasn't ripping him a new orifice for treating their kids like wiggling suitcases. "You're not mad?"

Lynn snorted, "frig no; I've had shifts here too you know!"

"Oh, right." Lincoln recalled various incidents that had happened while Lynn was 'on duty'. He even vaguely remembered having to pull Lulu off of Lynn's face after the little abomination took to becoming a figurative (he hoped) Facehugger. "Then you understand-"

"Why making the tykes easier to hang on to would be a good idea? Yeah trust me; these two?" She thumbed at her twins, currently playing chase around the table. "I nearly put 'em in leashes last week."

"Dang, what did they do?" Some people might have found the idea of restraining their children like animals utterly abhorrent.

Those people had not had to care for Loud children.

"L3 found my chocolate stash-"

"Enough said," Lincoln shuddered at the thought of Loud children finding chocolate again. "So do you want to talk to Leni about getting more onesies for you take home or-"

"Yeah dude," Lynn rapidly nodded. "I'm gettin' one for every day- but that's not what's important right now!" Lynn whistled, causing her twins' head to snap to her. "To me my mini-mes!"

Answering the call, the twins scrambled to their mother on little feet. Lacy stumbled to a stop just before Lynn III skidded to halt.

"Yea?" The bigger of the two queried.

"Okay sports, I can see you've got those nice handles now," Lynn grinned, and as her eyes flashed to Lincoln for a moment his well practiced 'Loud Shenanigans' sense altered him to incoming nonsense. "You wanna turn around let me give 'em a try?"

"Mommy make us fly?" Lacy gasped.

"You betcha!"

"Okay!" Lacy flipped around at the same time as her twin, letting Lynn get a good feel for how sturdy the handles were. As she expected they were solid and well attached, with a padded harness wrapping around the inside of the material so they wouldn't squish any one part of the toddlers body with all their weight.

Great job Leni!

"Okay girls, one! Two! THREEE!" She pulled up and suspended her girls in the air at her shoulder height with extended arms, prompting giggles from both twins. She expanded her arms out to her sides and slowly span on the spot, "wheee!"

"Flying!" Lacy laughed and flapped her arms like wings, little Lynn held hers out fixed instead and made what might be propeller noises with her mouth.

Lincoln couldn't help but smile and fished around for his camera to make a movie- but he'd left it with Luan because of The Song. "Lynn can I borrow your phone for a minute? I just want to get this on video."

"In my right pocket," Lynn nodded, and slowed down long enough for Lincoln to find her phone in her right shorts pocket, then span up again while he filmed.

It lasted all in all about five minutes of spinning and noises, with Lynn doing variations, swinging diagonally, then up and down as well. Then she finally started drawing then twins closer together, "oh no, flap faster Lacy'; L3's gonna get ya!"

Alas, Lacy's sudden burst of flaps did nothing to save her from Lynn III's relentless 'engine' and the smaller twin grabbed her sister from behind, prompting their mother to drop onto her butt and draw them into a three way hug into her stomach.

Lincoln couldn't help but smile and opened his mouth to 'aww' only to be cut off by Lynn III desperately wriggling away. "EWW! Mom you STINKY!"

This was true. Lynn Loud had spent most of the morning training in some way, and while she might have applied deodorant anyone who has done a heavy workout knows that nothing short of an actual shower will dispel the smell.

"Ah, sorry kids!" Lynn released her girls and let them run off for a moment, "no wait; Daddy needs you for something!"

"I do?" Lincoln queried in confusion, Lynn suddenly scooped up both girls again- Lynn III wriggling in protest from being close to the pungent parent again- and held them out to Lincoln.

"Yep, grab 'em by the handles!" Lynn grinned. "I've thought of a new exercise."

Lincoln raised an eyebrow but having recovered a bit and knowing better than to argue he put down Lynn's phone and grabbed both daughters by said handles. "Okay; what's the big-"

"Curl 'em." Lynn demanded.

"What?"

"Do a bicep curl with 'em," Lynn pointed at both children. "These little guys weigh about 25 pounds each, which is about what I was gonna have you curl today anyway; now we can make this a family thing."

"Hunh?" Lincoln carefully dropped both girls down to nearly his waist, just before his arms reached full extension then pulled the two up again. "Uff, I think they might be a bit heavier-"

"Nah they're just movin' about." Lynn leaned down to look at birth girls at their level. "You two are wiggly aren't you?"

"Yea!"

"Good," Lynn nodded in approval, before looking up to the surprised Lincoln's face. "Static weights are easier, but more mobile shifting stuff helps build up some control muscles and other stuff that tends to get neglected."

"So this is better?" Lincoln looked at the tots, "I'm not sure about how safe this is though, what if the handles break or something?"

"It'll be fine," Lynn stood up and waved his concerns away. "I'll talk to Leni about reinforcing the stitches when I ask for the new ones, and if you drop 'em you won't need to worry about exercise anymore."

"Okay- wait what?"

"And" Lynn continued. "They're always growing, so you'll be getting a slightly harder work out every day, like Milo of Croton!"

Lincoln stared at her blankly.

"… Like how MidKnight trained as a kid." Lynn course corrected.

"Oh! That's actually pretty cool Lynn!" Lincoln grinned.

Whatever exasperated acknowledgement Lynn might have made was lost as a sudden dreaded song came through the living room into the kitchen.

"Baby, Baby, Baby OOO!"

"Of fu-frig me!" Lynn groaned. "Dang it Luan-"

But it was not Luan who suddenly came stomping through the dining room, Lincoln's own phone in one hand and 'dancing' Lemy in the other. Rather it was a dead eyed Luna, followed by a sour looking Sam trying to keep hold of a similarly wiggling Lina and Lyra in her arms.

"Lincoln." She stared at him. "Come with us."

It was a command, not a request.

Staring at the phone that he had only just escaped from Lincoln indicated to the two children he already had. "Um- I'm kinda busy at the moment-"

Luna turned to the sporty sister; "Lynn, take your kids- we need Lincoln."

Lynn's eyes narrowed. "He's already with mine at the moment, how come-"

"We need to get this song out of their heads." Luna's voice gained a touch of pleading. "Please Lynn!"

Lynn looked at the phone, then back to Lincoln, who subtly shook his head.

Luna's prank had left him dealing with those three as pop-addicts for literal days at this point; she could deal with the nonsense she'd induced.

That and he wasn't feeling too charitable after this morning.

Alas, while Lincoln may have still been salty; Lynn had been dealing with the song herself when she'd taken a shift of her own earlier in the week. She was done with it then, and she was certainly done with it now and no amount of sympathy for Lincoln's plight would make her pass up Luna possibly undoing the mess she'd made, even if it meant Lincoln would probably be used at his expense somehow to try and fix it.

"I can take 'em for a bit," the sporty sister shrugged and plucked her kids from Lincoln's hands, ignoring the look of betrayal from her brother's eyes. "C'mon mini-mes, who wants shower time with Mommy!"

"Nooo!" Lacy protested.

"You stink, not me!" Lynn III complained.

But it was hopeless, the three disappeared up the stairs to leave Lincoln with no excuses. His bitterness was sated a bit though as he spotted the semi-visible form of Lulu (her skin and clothes assuming the colours of their surroundings) on the ceiling as she silently trailed after three. Whatever was going to happen next (probably more face hugging, since Lulu seemed to like the response), it would be both entertaining and Lincoln couldn't be blamed.

"Looks like you're helpin' us bruv," Luna's blunt voice took him from his musings as she tossed him the phone with the damned Song still playing. "C'mon, we're gonna try and cure 'em in the garage!"

"Cure them- oof!" Lincoln grunted as Sam handed him Lina, apparently still having enough sympathy to give him the lighter child if not enough to leave his arms empty.

"There's only one way to fix shit taste," Luna's eyes bore a new determination. "Ya show the Philistines what the Good Stuff is!"

Lincoln glanced at the garage through the window, and noted some stands set up. "… We're having a private concert?"

"Got it in one," Luna let a smile show through and snapped her fingers. "C'mon bruv; time to face the music!"