Summary: Version 2 of chapter 47. The scene between Sasuke and Charasuke is strictly platonic (no hints of romance etc.) in this version.
No other changes to the chapter!In this version of chapter 47, Charasuke gives Sasuke a forehead kiss, and everything is strictly platonic (friendship only). Just to be clear, later on in the fic, Naruto will find out about what happened, but it will be described in a way that this version of the chapter is just as real as the other version. So there will be no other hints or misunderstandings of romance between Sasuke and Charasuke. Although, Charasuke has complicated feelings about Sasuke, but there won't be anything that can be misunderstood as cheating or actually romantic.
Other than this change, the author's notes and the content of the chapter is the same as chapter 47!
*tour guide voice* if you look to the left, you'll notice an excessive amount of tea drinking and hatred of paper work, which is the author projecting her own life onto the characters
6 months later I am back on my bullshit. I was procrastinating A Big Scene and then I didn't even add it to this chapter. When I sat down to write it, I had to consider what was missing before I could write it, and apparently that was a whole 9K of words so. To avoid further delays, you're getting this now and the rest later.
I had big plans to write this over the holidays, but I ended up really busy for personal reasons. I'm not even going to make any wishes for 2021, as we all know how it went when I asked for 2020 to deliver. It's Monday morning and I'm pretending this fic is part of my work description, don't tell my boss. I haven't gotten my raise yet so I think this is a fair deal.
I'll leave the rest of my rambling for the end notes... enjoy! But also, I have to ask, if you read here on FF... how do you deal with the ads in the middle of chapters? I am probably going to remove all my fics from FF in the near future, except for this one (at least until it's finished). I've moved almost all of them over to ao3 by now. Consider this a heads up!
(For those of you with sinkhole memories like me:
Previously on: Naruto went back to their own dimension with Sakura and Obito and is stuck, several people now know he's gay for Sasuke and Menma revealed that he sometimes has dreams that are probably about Kaguya and the God Tree. Sasuke and Charasuke went to the spa and Menma didn't actually cheat with Sai. Charasuke told Gaara what actually happened. Akatsuki is off on a mission to try and stop the bijuu from being captured. Shisui suggested to Charasuke that maybe he's involved in this whole mess too.)
Chapter 47: You're not alone
xxx
Itachi reached Konoha again approximately two and a half days after leaving with Deidara and Kisame to find Utakata. He made it to the Hokage's office with no interruptions on the way, the ANBU guard outside letting him in without a word. Nawaki sat by Tsunade's desk, reading through reports. When Itachi entered he looked up, frowning at the sight of him.
"I'm guessing you didn't have much success?" he asked, and Itachi made a face as he walked closer.
The bandages on his left arm itched, but he supposed it was the tears in his cloak that brought forth Nawaki's comment.
"Do you want the good news or the bad news first?" he asked, attempting a smile as Nawaki gave him a tired look. "Well, we didn't have any success preventing the rokubi from being captured, but we did reach Utakata before it happened. So the good news is that we've got an intact portal, but the bad news is that it doesn't seem to work anymore."
"Better than nothing," Nawaki sighed, leaning back in his chair. The usual cheer was absent from his expression, his eyes serious as he contemplated Itachi for a few seconds. "Gaara disappeared a couple of hours ago."
Itachi nodded, a heavy feeling in his chest.
"How many are left?"
"We're not sure. Maybe three of them. Including Menma, if he's still in the other dimension."
The odds were looking worse and worse. He drew in a deep breath, letting it out slow enough to gather his thoughts.
"I think we can assume they've all been taken," he said, Nawaki giving him a bleak smile of agreement. "Does Sasuke know yet?"
"We'll have a briefing with the council first thing in the morning, and inform Sasuke after that. I think it's time we make it clear to him how serious this is. Whatever it is, I doubt it'll be long before it happens."
Privately, Itachi thought that Sasuke would have let them know if he had any idea of what was going on. With Naruto stuck in the other dimension with Menma, it didn't make sense for them to have some kind of ulterior motive. The sooner they all accepted that they were fumbling in the dark, the better.
"I'll be there," he told Nawaki, keeping his voice carefully neutral. "Kisame and Deidara are bringing the portal over to the Akatsuki headquarters. If anything happens with it, it won't be too close to any of the villages at least."
"Thanks, Itachi. Let's hope they can figure out how it works, maybe we can actually get out of this mess intact. I'll let Tsunade know."
With a short nod, Itachi left. His muscles ached from the strain, but he still hurried through the streets towards his parents' house. The fight against Utakata had been eerie, to say the least. The change had been so sudden, unlike how both Sasukes had described it. Perhaps their unknown enemy was running out of time.
He could say one thing for sure, though – he would rather not have to fight any of the bijuu ever again. His brother was lucky that Naruto and the other Sasuke had intervened. Shivering, he flexed his fingers to ward off the anxious feeling of premonition crawling up his arms. Shisui was right, when he said he didn't like not knowing everything. He preferred being in control, facts laid out neatly, each step calculated.
Reaching the house, he quietly made his way inside. He peeked into Sasuke's room, finding it empty. Inside his own, Shisui was sprawled out in bed, the curtains open to let in the moonlight. It washed over his pale skin, his dark curls in stark contrast to it. The thought of losing this view… He sighed, gingerly slipping out of his cloak and clothes, not bothering putting on something to sleep in. He didn't hold any high hopes for actual sleep, but Shisui was soft and warm as he slid under the covers beside him.
Burying his nose in soft hair, he ran his fingertips down Shisui's spine, hand curving around a hip. It made Shisui stir, a low hum reaching Itachi's ears as he shuffled around to face him.
"Back already?"
Shisui's hands ran over his body, searching for injuries. They caught on his bandaged arm, but Itachi pressed a finger to his lips.
"I'm fine," he promised, wincing when Shisui poked at his ribs.
"Sure you are," Shisui muttered, but didn't argue further.
Instead he tugged Itachi closer, burying his face in his neck. His breaths were hot against Itachi's cold skin, and it was so easy to sink into the comfort of his touch. He ran his fingers through Shisui's hair, sifting the curls between them, trying to think of nothing. They'd lost so much time the past year, all because of Itachi's stubbornness.
"It'll be okay," Shisui whispered, palm flat between Itachi's shoulder blades, pressing into him. "I've said it before and I'll say it again, as many times as you need me to."
"That might be every day for the rest of our lives," Itachi said, unable to hold back a small smile as Shisui sighed.
"Have I told you that you worry too much?"
"Many times, yes."
Shisui pinched his side, right on top of a bruise.
"You can't control everything."
"Obviously. Maybe now you understand why I don't want to become Hokage."
He could almost hear Shisui struggling not to say anything. He was thankful for the silence though, too tired to argue about this. He shouldn't have mentioned it in the first place. Shisui pressed his face against his shoulder, hand curling around his side. When Itachi placed his hand over his, he felt him sigh, squeezing their fingers together. It was such a relief that he never had to pretend with Shisui. He could voice all his worries, knowing Shisui was there for him. He'd been so angry when he was chosen as a final candidate for the Hokage position… In hindsight, it felt like a silly thing to be upset over. Even so, he still wasn't sure he'd ever forgive him if he was chosen to become Hokage. He'd do his duty, but the truth was that he feared the responsibility. Considering what was currently happening, he didn't think that fear was unfounded.
"Shh," Shisui hushed him, shifting closer to him. "You're thinking too much again."
"You try turning off my brain, then."
Shisui shifted even closer, with more purpose, and Itachi thought, ah.
Should have known he'd take it like that.
xxx
Sasuke wasn't entirely sure how he went from S-ranked criminal, enemy of all Konoha, to house building, to baby sitter. He was extremely dubious of Iruka's judgment; surely children this tiny might get permanently damaged by mere proximity to him. And yet, little Daisuke looked perfectly content sipping on some juice, held up in Sasuke's arms. Working for the police force was strange enough, but at least somewhat logical. This? He carefully adjusted his grip on the child, frowning as Daisuke looked at him questioningly.
"What?" he asked, receiving no reply.
Iruka had disappeared to deal with a delivery, leaving Sasuke alone with the entire group of kids in the middle of breakfast. Charasuke, of course, was nowhere to be seen.
At least the rest of them were behaving, more focused on shoving food into their mouths. The eldest girl kept glancing at him, possibly with worry. Sasuke could understand that. Shuffling noises from the doorway alerted him to Charasuke's arrival, his counterpart doing a double take at the sight of him. The corners of his lips twitched, a hand coming up to hide his mouth as Sasuke glared threateningly at him. His only comfort was that Naruto wasn't there to see him.
Though, the thought made something painful twist inside his stomach. Naruto would have teased him mercilessly, grinning wide enough to split his face in half.
"Good morning everyone," Charasuke said, greeting the children. "Did you sleep well?"
Most of them nodded, too busy chewing to reply. Charasuke found himself some breakfast, leaning against the wall beside Sasuke as he ate. He smiled at Daisuke, tickling him underneath his chin until he giggled and swatted at him, almost dropping his sippy cup. Sasuke noticed that the smile didn't reach his eyes, his face looking tired and drawn as soon as the smile dropped.
"You should have woken me up," he mumbled, bumping into his shoulder.
Sasuke shrugged as well as he could. Daisuke seemed to enjoy being jostled, letting out an amused noise.
"I've got things under control."
Even though he snorted in reply, Charasuke nodded. Iruka came back soon after, efficient as ever as he made sure the kids finished up and no one looked too messy as he ushered them away to brush their teeth and wash up.
"Thanks," he said, as he relieved Sasuke of the three-year-old, propping him up against his hip and putting the now empty cup down. "Would you two mind cleaning up? And if you have time in the afternoon I could use some help with shopping."
"Gotcha," Charasuke said, saluting him.
Iruka smiled at them, fussing over Daisuke as he left.
"When do you need to leave?" Charasuke asked him as they headed for the table, starting to gather up the dirty dishes and leftover food. "I thought I'd come with you, say hi to Sakura. Do a couple errands."
Sasuke must have made a face, because Charasuke shook his head at him in amusement. He had another check-up with Orochimaru, unfortunately. He would have rather spent the time training, but at least Charasuke hadn't headed straight for the couch to spend the day as a depressed lump. He seemed like a few days of rest had done him good.
"Soon," he said, debating if he should take a shower. "Won't Sakura be annoyed if you bother her at work?"
"That's half the fun," Charasuke shrugged. He leaned past Sasuke as he reached for another plate, not bothering to walk around him. "I can be ready in ten."
"Fine."
They accompanied Iruka and the kids half the way, splitting up with only minor disagreement. Natsuko had insisted that Charasuke carried her on his shoulders the entire way, tugging happily at his hair, blissfully unaware of his dark looks of suffering. One of the boys kept grinning at the sight, but wisely didn't make any comments out loud.
"You didn't have to follow me the entire way to Orochimaru's office," Sasuke sighed when they arrived, pausing near the door.
"But I wanted to," Charasuke said innocently, clasping his hands behind his back. "You didn't precisely seem excited about the visit."
Well, that was an understatement if any.
"Bad associations," he muttered, assuming Charasuke would leave it at that.
"What, Orochimaru himself? He's harmless."
"Not in my dimension."
There was a curious look in Charasuke's eyes now, that he maybe should have anticipated and avoided.
"What did he do?"
Too many things to list, really, and Sasuke was about to tell Charasuke to leave when he stepped closer, poking him in the chest.
"I'm not leaving until you tell me."
"I don't think you want to know."
Charasuke pursed his lips.
"Should you really be in a closed room alone with him if it's that bad? He's not the only doctor in this hospital."
Sasuke shrugged. He didn't feel particularly worse off after talking to Orochimaru. At this point it would just be more trouble to ask for someone else.
"He'll live."
When Charasuke stared at him, wide-eyed, he couldn't help but poke him back.
"Don't ask if you don't want to know."
"One of these days you're going to have to tell me the full story, you know."
"I think I'll pass."
He took a step towards Orochimaru's office, impatient. The sooner he was over with it the better.
"You know," Charasuke started, completely ignoring Sasuke's waning patience. "I'm kind of happy we're the same person."
"Why?" Sasuke frowned, trying to interpret the thoughtful look on his counterpart's face.
"Because you don't have any weird memories of me." He put his hands to his sides, huffing. "You'd think Naruto could have been a little nicer to me."
Despite the way something stabbed at his chest at the mention of Naruto, Sasuke shook his head with a wry smile. Even though they were both barely holding it together, Charasuke had a way of drawing smiles out of him, much to his chagrin.
"It's not your fault," he said. "Well, not only."
Charasuke rolled his eyes. He stepped closer, Sasuke raising an eyebrow in question.
"Naruto's not here, so he can't yell at me for this," Charasuke said, grinning. "And there are no windows to throw me out of."
He gently cupped Sasuke's face, ignoring the second raised eyebrow Sasuke gave him. Standing on his toes, tilting Sasuke's head down just a little, he pressed a quick peck to his forehead. Charasuke looked pleased with himself as he let go, stepping back again. He contemplated mentioning that this sort of thing was most likely a contribution to Naruto's dislike of him, whether he was aware of it or not.
"I should…" Charasuke trailed off, clearing his throat. Where a second ago he'd looked smug, he now seemed embarrassed instead. "I should go."
"Sure. See you later."
Glancing up at him, the look in his eyes was unreadable. He weighed back on his heels, shoving his hands into his pockets. Eventually he sighed, and Sasuke tried not to think about how Charasuke's presence had become reassuring to him.
"You don't need to look so amused," Charasuke muttered, pouting before turning around to stalk down the corridor, shoulders stiff.
Sasuke watched him go, amused and sympathetic against his better judgement. He could indulge him, he supposed. Naruto's absence may be a festering wound on his soul, but he could steel himself against the pain and separate it from his body. Charasuke's suffering was more alike Naruto's – a physical need that clawed at him, leaving him clinging to Sasuke at night. Knowing that Naruto was alone, with no one to find comfort with, hurt him more than his own pain and loss.
He drew in a slow breath, pushing the thought away.
Orochimaru barely looked up as he entered the office, not bothering to knock.
"I don't think I want to know why you're late," he said, waving a hand at the visitor's chair. "I'll just finish this."
Sasuke sat down, watching Orochimaru as he scribbled in a notebook. His hair fell into his face, eyes narrowed as he scowled down at his notes. He probably was harmless, but that in itself was weird enough.
"Tsunade wants to see you after this." Throwing the notebook carelessly onto his desk, Orochimaru straightened up and bore his eyes into Sasuke's. "Seems like most of the jinchuuriki have disappeared by now."
"Gaara?"
Orochimaru nodded.
"Sometime during the night."
Well, Charasuke certainly wouldn't be happy to hear that. Sasuke wasn't looking forward to telling him.
"No one followed him?"
"No one noticed he left."
Perhaps the person behind this was getting impatient. Sasuke could understand that. He, too, felt like crawling out of his skin whenever he thought about how much time they were just spending waiting. His fingers curled over his lap, clenching into fists. He didn't like any of the theories he'd considered, and he wondered if Tsunade would offer any insight.
"So, how are you feeling?"
He gave Orochimaru a deadpan look.
"You know, Sasuke," Orochimaru continued, pursing his lips. "As your assigned doctor, I'd like to be able to tell the Hokage something at least. So, how are you feeling? Homicidal? Like you want to burn down the village? Or stable enough that no one needs to panic?"
Sasuke sighed. How ironic was it, that Orochimaru of all people would ask him that? He made a flippant gesture with a hand.
"No more homicidal than usual," he said, tone dry. "It really isn't me that you need to worry about."
"I suppose not." Orochimaru reached for another notebook, finding a blank page and jotting down some notes. "Though I think once this whole mess is over, I'm booking you some therapy sessions."
"No thanks."
Orochimaru looked up from the page, holding his gaze for a few seconds.
"It'll help you."
"I'll be returning to my own dimension, if you forgot."
"I didn't." He tapped his pen against the notebook, a thoughtful expression on his face. "Well, the offer stands. Your dimension might benefit from an exchange with us."
Sasuke searched his eyes, wondering why he seemed so sure that they would be able to return.
"Think about it, at least," he added, giving Sasuke a look as if to dare him to disagree.
"Maybe," was all Sasuke said.
xxx
Shisui spun a kunai around a finger, catching it at even intervals. He knew it annoyed Obito, but the other man was occupied with a mountain of scrolls, and Shisui didn't have much else to do. Well, not much else to do that he couldn't ignore at the moment, that is. He blinked sleep out of his eyes, wishing he was still in bed with Itachi. Though, Itachi was sitting at the other end of the table, staring unseeingly down at the report on Gaara's disappearance.
Tsunade would arrive soon, probably together with her brother and Anko. Another fun little meeting. There was a creaking noise as Obito leaned back in his chair, stretching his arms over his head.
"Do you think we can convince people to vote for Anko?" he asked, grimacing as he rolled his shoulders. "I don't think I want to see another scroll ever again."
Shisui gasped.
"You want me to lose my job? Is that it? I'm the one who has to do the worst of it, anyway."
"Anko might take you on," Itachi suggested, traitor that he was.
"Madara would turn in his grave," Shisui told him, equal parts horrified and betrayed. "It's like you have no clan pride at all."
"If Madara turned in his grave every time we did something he disagreed with, he'd never get any rest," Obito muttered, standing up and walking over to the door. "Does anyone want tea?"
"Blasphemy, both of you," Itachi commented calmly, rolling up his scroll. "And yes, please."
Once Obito had closed the door behind him, Shisui placed his arms on the tabletop and buried his face in them with a loud groan.
"You've barely done any work," Itachi sighed irritably, throwing a scroll at his head.
It fell to the floor, rolling underneath a chair. Shisui pouted as he bent to pick it up, placing it neatly next to Obito's pile.
"If you found yourself an assistant, you could make them do your work," he suggested, tapping his fingertips against the tabletop for a minute as Itachi ignored him. "Who are you going to pick if you win?"
"That's a theoretical problem and I refuse to speculate."
He couldn't help but laugh, leaning his head in one hand as he watched Itachi stubbornly pick up another report to read. It wasn't long before Obito returned with Sasuke accompanying him, both of them with a mug in each hand.
"Oh, thanks," Shisui said as Sasuke handed him one of the mugs, sitting down next to him. "How's Charasuke?"
"He'll be okay."
Itachi gave him a sharp look.
"Has he been resting properly?"
"I think so." Sasuke took a careful sip of his tea, glancing between them. "He'll need to start learning how to use his sharingan soon."
Shisui winced at the dark look passing over Itachi's face. Neither of them were particularly looking forward to it, but Sasuke was right. They couldn't put it off forever. Things were a little too busy right now, though.
Anko's voice could be heard through the still open door, and a moment later she appeared together with Tsunade and Nawaki. Shisui wondered for a moment if Anko had chosen an assistant yet, or if Obito was the only one who actually planned ahead for things.
"Good, you're all here," Tsunade said as she entered the room, wasting no time as she sat down.
She placed her wide-brimmed hokage hat on the table, hands clasped behind it. It was unusual to see her in full hokage robes, and Shisui supposed she'd worn it for the council meeting this morning.
"We haven't had time to give Sasuke all the details yet," Obito told her, before turning towards Sasuke. "Gaara disappeared early this morning, and we're working under the assumption that the rest have been captured as well. Itachi and his team managed to secure an intact portal, which is currently located at the Akatsuki headquarters."
"Nothing we tried managed to activate it," Itachi added, answering Sasuke's silent question.
"So, that leaves us with just one question left," Nawaki said, clapping his hands together. "What do we do now?"
Even though he was smiling, the tension could easily be felt throughout the room. Shisui started spinning the kunai around his finger again, gnawing on his lips as his gaze darted between the other occupants in the room. As thankful as he was that he didn't have any sort of authority, and therefore no real pressure on his shoulders to come up with a course of action, he wasn't exempt from the urgency of the situation.
"Any ideas, Sasuke?" It was Anko, her eyes searching as they all turned towards the one remaining dimension traveler. "You're the only one who's been through something similar before, from what I've heard."
"Hardly similar," Sasuke said quietly. His brows were furrowed, shoulders tense. "I'd like to go see the portal."
Shisui shared a look with Itachi. The chance was higher that something Sasuke did would work, but at what cost?
"I think I'd like to keep you in the village for now," Tsunade said, crossing her arms with a heavy exhale. "Even if you manage to activate it, how do we know you're not simply walking into a trap?"
Sasuke looked like he was barely refraining from rolling his eyes.
"Do you have a better plan?" he asked, sounding almost bored. Shisui, who sat next to him, was able to glance down and see how his fingers dug into his pants. "Waiting isn't doing us any good."
"Going in blind won't either," Tsunade pointed out, irritated.
"We know enough," Sasuke insisted, and Obito cleared his throat before Tsunade could retort.
"I think, regardless of where the portal is, Sasuke will be able to find it," he said, silence falling after his words.
Everyone looked at Tsunade, waiting for her to make a decision. She rarely got angry, but it seemed the past days had tested even her patience. She closed her eyes and drew in a few deep breaths, finally letting out an annoyed huff.
"Fine," she gave in, laying her palms onto the table, fingers spread wide. "I don't like it, but I'd rather be there when it happens. Itachi, let them know to bring it here."
Itachi nodded, immediately getting up to relay the order. He had to wonder if Obito had said it because he agreed with the idea, or simply to avoid an argument he knew would end with Sasuke doing what he wanted anyway.
"We're really doing this, huh?" Nawaki commented. He was still standing, leaning against the backrest of a chair. "Can't say I'm not tired of just standing around waiting."
"There's no guarantee it'll work," Tsunade snapped at him, then quickly gathered herself again. "Obito, I want you supervising any attempts made. I'll be there myself as much as I can."
She didn't seem to feel the need to ask for Sasuke's opinion. Shisui glanced at him, but he kept his lips thinned, any opinions to himself. His dark eyes seemed to drink the information in, probably strategizing for when the portal arrived. Like this, he was nothing like their own Sasuke, different enough that Shisui had to wonder how alike the inhabitants of their worlds really were. Maybe what was on the other side of the portal was a simple task for someone who had once faced a chakra goddess.
"At least it's exciting," Anko grinned, tugging at the zipper to her chuunin vest. "If they think they can take us down easily, they're dead wrong."
Shisui would prefer not being taken down at all. He pocketed the kunai, glancing around the table before clearing his throat.
"Well, that's that. If there's nothing else to discuss…?"
He received an amused smile from Obito, his heart sinking as Nawaki sat down heavily in his chair, evidently settling in for continued discussion.
"As much as I wish we could cut this short, we should take the opportunity to review things," Nawaki answered, combing a hand through his short hair before waving a hand at him. "Why don't you read us the latest summary, Shisui?"
At least Sasuke looked as pained as he felt, and they shared a long-suffering look as Shisui reached for a scroll he and Obito had gone through not even an hour ago.
"At your service," he sighed, unwrapping it.
Maybe Obito had been onto something when he suggested they let Anko win the election.
Xxx
His father found him just as he swung open the gate to the orphanage. He paused, hand gripping the handle tightly. If he thought he could get away with it, he'd dash indoors and beg Iruka to pretend he wasn't there.
"Sasuke."
Heaving a sigh, he turned around. Fugaku was wearing his uniform, and the usual frown on his face. Well, usual for when Charasuke was in trouble, at least.
"Father," he acknowledged him, warily crossing his arms.
But Fugaku wasn't looking at him, instead taking in the orphanage with thoughtful eyes. There was no movement inside, but Iruka was probably there somewhere, waiting for Sasuke to come back so they could go grocery shopping with the youngest children. Iruka didn't seem to think it strange that Sasuke had basically taken over Naruto's duties, but watching him try to navigate the kids was hilarious.
"You've been staying with Iruka," Fugaku said, less of a question and more of a statement. "I suppose he needs some help now that Naruto's clones aren't here."
"He does."
"Do you enjoy it?"
The question caught him off guard. He blinked a few times, leaning against the wooden gate as his father clearly waited for some sort of reply.
"It's mostly Sasuke that does the work…" he started, unsure of how to continue.
He didn't precisely want to admit that he hasn't felt up to much aside from lying face down on the couch while Natsuko played with his hair and forced him to rate her drawings. Or that he'd hidden in their room when Sai dropped by unannounced for a visit.
"Well, you're still recovering." The frown deepened, and Charasuke had to wonder if he was being scolded somehow without picking up on it. "When are you coming back?"
"Ha," he said, shoving his hands into his pockets instead. "Not as long as I'm on probation."
"Your mother is worried about you-"
"Uh-huh, and I'm staying here. Besides, you told me to keep an eye on Sasuke, anyway. Just doing my duty."
He fired off a fake smile, hoping his father would understand that he wasn't in the mood for this. If his mother wanted something, she could tell him herself.
"Gaara disappeared during the night," Fugaku told him, voice quiet.
For a moment, Charasuke's heart stopped. Then it started beating furiously inside his chest, his lungs struggling for air.
"What?"
"Tsunade-sama has agreed that you might be in danger, too. I'm sure Sasuke would have told you later, but I wanted to let you know."
Clenching his fists inside his pockets, nails digging into palms, Charasuke forced himself to swallow against the lump in his throat.
"You think something will happen soon?"
Fugaku nodded grimly, taking a step closer to put a hand to his shoulder.
"I'd prefer if you were at home with us." His hand was warm on Charasuke's shoulder, the concern in his eyes so raw that he had to look away. "Please, Sasuke."
Licking his dry lips, Charasuke drew in a deep breath. He stared down at the ground, knowing that he should agree, and yet something held him back. If he stayed here or went back home, it probably wouldn't make a difference for his own safety. But if he stayed here…
"I can't," he whispered, taking a step back. "Sasuke needs me. And I want to stay close to him, just in case…"
"Sasuke-"
"No, I won't change my mind." He raised his face, trying to muster up as much resolve as he could. "I know Sasuke will stay here, so I'm staying with him."
They looked at each other, Charasuke holding his breath. He knew it was a bad idea, probably, but his gut feeling was telling him it was the right thing to do. To his surprise, his father nodded once, squeezing his shoulder.
"I don't agree with it, but I won't force you."
Something heavy fell from his chest as he heard the words, leaving him lighter. He nodded, too, trying to interpret the strange look his father was giving him. A moment later Fugaku stepped back, letting go of him.
"At least come by for dinner soon," he said, letting out a quiet sigh when Sasuke averted his eyes again. "Be careful, if nothing else."
"Of course."
It might have come out a little defensive, but Fugaku didn't comment on it. Charasuke watched him as he left, biting at his lips. He'd always admired his father's confidence, the way he somehow projected to people that he was reliable, that no matter what happened he'd solve it. Itachi had that same feeling about him, like every word he said was worth listening to. His mother, too, inspired respect, but more in a way that demanded you listen. He'd always felt overshadowed…
He pushed the gate open, slowly making his way along the path leading up to the house. Growing up, he'd always wished he was special. That he was someone, that people would take notice of him. He'd thought there was a secret code to it, like if he just cracked it he'd be just like his brother. Like all he needed was one thing finally going right, if he could just get a full score on this test, or learn a new technique, or at least say something clever… But it never happened, and so what was the point in working hard?
Hovering inside the hallway, he considered just going home. Do what his parents wanted, play nice, let them decide for him what was the best course of action. It's not like he knew better than them.
He pressed his fingers to his lips.
This wasn't about him. Not really. He felt awful, and he worried constantly for Menma, but he wasn't the person all of this was really happening to, was he? He was just on the sidelines, hoping for the best. And if it didn't matter to his own fate where he was, then maybe it mattered to the other Sasuke. If there was even a small thing that he could do, to make things a little less hard, to make Sasuke a little less alone, then he had to do it, didn't he? And if Shisui was right, and he really had a part to play in all this, wasn't it logical that he stayed with Sasuke in that case?
Slapping his cheeks to try and get rid of all the doubts, he knew he couldn't give up this time. This was more important than his shitty self-confidence, or his fight with his mother. If he got through this he'd do something about his life, but until then he just had to hold on, somehow.
Heaving a deep sigh, he entered the house properly, catching Natsuko as she launched herself at his legs.
"Help me draw!" she insisted, tugging at his shirt until the fabric stretched, possibly beyond repair.
She seemed to easily separate him from his counterpart. Sasuke's shirts were never tugged. He was deposited on the couch, her tiny hands quickly gathering up paper and crayons before she settled herself in his lap.
"I'm drawing Naruto," she announced, starting out with a round face and wild yellow hair. "He's away, saving the world."
Charasuke had to close his eyes for a moment. When he opened them, she'd already drawn his orange jumpsuit, and had started on some kind of swirling mass of black and blue.
"What's that?" he asked, as she contemplated her creation.
"It's you," she said. "You're too sad to have a body."
Breath catching, Charasuke stared dumbly down at the drawing.
"What about the other Sasuke?"
"He's playing with Daisuke. I'll draw him next," she dismissed his question with, and imperiously held out her hand. "Give me the purple one."
He did.
xxx
Ino found her in her office, face buried in her hands. It was getting late, the room turning darker by the minute as the sun set. She hadn't bothered turning on any lights, barely noticing the passage of time. Her head hurt, piles of paperwork in forgotten heaps littering the desk. Ino tsked at her, grabbing a chair and pulling it over to her desk, sitting down in front of her.
"And you tell me to take it easy and get some sleep," she huffed, leaning over the desk to poke Sakura's forehead. "Talk to me."
"I don't know what to say," Sakura muttered, rubbing at her eyes. She glanced at Ino through her fingers, sighing heavily. "It's been two days, and absolutely nothing has happened. Naruto's climbing the walls, and if it keeps being this quiet I think he'll explode."
"He's worried about Sasuke."
Sakura thinned her lips, forcing down another sigh as she leaned back in her chair. Ino watched her with concern, her hair loose as she twisted her hair tie between her hands. She wore her usual purple outfit, and she looked a lot better than Sakura felt.
"I don't think anyone's missed that he's not exactly happy to be back," she continued, raising her eyebrows meaningfully. "And I can't even mention Sasuke without you becoming all depressed. Come on, tell me what happened."
"Why do you think something happened?" Sakura picked up a few papers, uselessly trying to put them in some semblance of order. The rest of her life hadn't paused just because Naruto returned, and there were patients and research to handle, not to mention trying to get everything back to the standard they had before everything went to hell.
"Because you've been avoiding talking to me about something. I can tell."
Making a face, Sakura abandoned her attempts at looking busy and leveled Ino with a tired glare.
"Maybe I just don't want to talk about it."
"Mhm, but don't think I'm going to accept that. I've waited long enough, but I can see that it's eating you up from the inside."
She could tell that Ino wasn't going to back down, but she still hesitated. Even if they managed to replace the people that didn't support Naruto fully, she kept worrying about Naruto blurting out his new relationship with Sasuke at the wrong moment. Her own feelings aside, she truly did believe that Naruto was the only way they'd be able to truly achieve peace between the ninja villages. Even those who did support him didn't necessarily support Sasuke…
"It's…" She trailed off, biting her lips. She knew she could trust Ino, but she was having a hard time coming to terms with it herself. Still, if Naruto did blurt it out, it was better if some of them knew already, wasn't it? "It's about Naruto and Sasuke."
Ino nodded, pulling the chair closer to the desk. She watched Sakura attentively, expression open. At least Ino was over her crush on Sasuke, unlike Sakura was.
"What did they do?" Ino asked when she still hesitated, an amused smile playing on her lips. "At this point, nothing will surprise me."
"Yeah, maybe this will." Sakura cleared her throat, drawing in a deep breath. "So, remember when you joked that you thought they'd eloped?"
"Uh-huh?" Ino blinked at her for a few moments, then her eyes widened in realization. "Wait, you mean-? They got married?!"
"No, no of course not. I think." Cheeks heating up, Sakura twisted her fingers as Ino stared at her, mouth open in surprise. "But they… well. Naruto said they're dating."
Snapping her mouth shut, Ino fell back into her chair, stunned. She searched Sakura's face, letting out a slow breath when it was obvious that Sakura wasn't joking.
"Well, alright. I'm surprised. It kind of makes sense though, doesn't it?" All in all, she seemed to be taking this better than Sakura had. "How long?"
"I'm not sure. Not long."
Nodding to herself, Ino pursed her lips in thought. She tapped the hair tie against her mouth, staring at the pile of papers in front of her. After a minute or so she looked back up, narrowing her eyes at Sakura.
"And how are you dealing with this?" she asked, as always reading Sakura expertly. "No wonder you've been clammed up the past few days."
"Yeah, I don't know." Sakura let out a strained laugh, pushing her face into her hands for a moment. "Of course I support them, I want them to be happy…"
"But?"
She gave Ino a look, trying to convey the problem without words.
"Something's not good about this?" Ino guessed, frowning when Sakura rolled her eyes.
"Not good is putting it mildly. How do you think people are going to react when they find out?"
"Oh. Right." Ino gnawed on a thumb, her frown growing more pronounced. "I'm sure Shikamaru can come up with a solution."
Sakura sighed. If only it was that simple. She stood up, stretching out a few kinks in her back. She wasn't going to get any more work done tonight, that was for sure.
"Like what, erase people's memories so they suddenly approve of Sasuke? Naruto didn't just pick a guy, he literally picked the worst possible person for the future Hokage to be in a relationship with."
"Not the worst person," Ino said, flicking her hair back over her shoulders. "Orochimaru is still lurking around, isn't he?"
Staring at her, Sakura tried to pretend she hadn't just heard that.
"You know what I mean," she said, and it was Ino's turn to roll her eyes.
She wished she could take the news as easily as Ino. It kept her up at night, twisting and turning in bed as she wondered how much trouble they would face.
"Come on, Sakura," Ino said, smiling encouragingly. "It's not so bad. I mean, people were already suspecting things, right? Naruto's always been a little over the top when it comes to Sasuke. Like, you look at Sasuke wrong at risk of severe physical pain. It makes more sense that he's in love with him than if he wasn't, I think."
"Tell that to everyone trying to get rid of him," Sakura muttered, shooing at Ino until she got out of the chair and headed for the door. "I'm not going to sleep right for years."
Ino huffed at her, twisting her hair into her usual ponytail with a few practiced movements.
"You always worry so much. If Naruto is so hell-bent on creating problems for himself, he can figure out a solution. It's not your responsibility, Sakura."
"They're my teammates," she argued, closing the door behind them. "And Naruto doesn't realize what he's up against."
He hadn't heard what people said in the weeks he'd been gone. Until they knew what was happening with Menma and the other dimension's Kaguya, she didn't want him to have to deal with all the other stuff, too. But every time she tried to bring it up he said he didn't want to talk about it. The past two days had been tense, to say the least.
"Hey." Ino put a hand on her arm, making her pause. The corridor was brightly lit, but quiet. "One day at a time. We can talk more about this tomorrow."
She waited until Sakura nodded, reluctantly agreeing. Then she smiled, squeezing her arm once for support.
"I'm surprised you're taking this so well," Sakura admitted, Ino's smile widening.
"I had a hunch already," she said, letting go of her so that they could keep walking. "I just didn't want to say anything, in case I was wrong."
Making a valiant attempt at smiling back, Sakura followed her outside in silence. The hospital was bustling with activity as always, only the office area getting some peace and quiet. She shivered at the sudden drop in temperature once they exited the reception area, glancing up at the dark sky. She should go check on Naruto, but something held her back. When Ino suggested going for dinner, she quickly agreed. Maybe she could try to put it all out of her mind for just one night, and like Ino said, they could talk about it tomorrow instead. There wasn't much she could do at the moment, anyway.
Aside from worrying, that is.
xxx
When Naruto opened the door, he was surprised to find Iruka and not Sakura standing on the other side.
"Are you busy?" Iruka asked, as if Naruto hadn't been pacing the length of his living room, arguing with Kurama about the lack of news.
"Nope."
Iruka followed him inside to the kitchen, waving at Naruto to sit down and searching through the cupboards for tea powder and cups. Naruto watched him in silence, wondering what he wanted to talk about. Maybe Tsunade had sent him. He'd been sighing a lot today as he tried to catch up with the mountain of papers on his desk. You'd think Shizune could have looked through it while he was gone.
"So," Iruka said as he sat down, pushing a cup towards Naruto. "You and Sasuke, huh?"
Naruto stared at him for a long moment, contemplating leaving through the window. Hadn't their conversation at Ichiraku's been bad enough? He'd done as Sakura said and kept quiet about it for now, but now that Iruka asked, he found that he wanted to talk about it. He hadn't exactly had anyone to ask for advice – not that anyone else would know what to do about Sasuke – but Iruka's expression was patiently kind, and Naruto gripped his teacup with more force than he should.
"I guess, yeah," he replied, swallowing awkwardly. "It kind of… happened."
Humming, Iruka waited for him to continue.
"I don't know why I didn't realize it earlier, like once I did realize it was so obvious? I just felt like I couldn't, like I shouldn't-"
He paused, gnawing on his lower lip. He wasn't sure how to explain. As obvious as Teuchi had made it sound, it hadn't been obvious to him.
It was obvious to me, Kurama commented, because he seemed to take some kind of sick pleasure in reminding Naruto that he'd known about his Sasuke-crush for years or something.
"What did Sasuke say about it?" Iruka asked, when the pause had stretched out too long.
Naruto huffed, leaning back and rubbing at his neck. To think Sasuke hadn't put up much of a fight. He had to ask him sometime if he ever suspected things, the way so many others had apparently done.
"He was pretty okay with it," he said, rolling his eyes when Iruka gave him a look of disbelief. "I mean, I think he was a bit surprised, too. But um, Menma and Charasuke, I mean, the other Sasuke, they're together, or at least was."
Iruka made a funny face, kind of like he wanted to laugh but in pain.
"What?"
"Charasuke?"
"Oh, yeah, his name's Sasuke too so he got a nickname." Iruka kept looking at him funny, and Naruto realized he didn't know what Charasuke was like. "It suits him, he's like, a huge flirt. They're so different, it's weird.
"I heard most things are different there?"
"Yeah." Naruto wasn't sure how to explain it. It wasn't just that everyone acted differently… They'd all grown up in a different world, and in some ways they weren't even the same people. And some of them were so alike his own world that it was terrifying. "But some of it is the same… Like Baa-chan being hokage. You run an orphanage, though."
Blinking at him, Iruka took a few moments to let the information sink in.
"Did you grow up there?"
There was something regretful in his eyes, that Naruto didn't know how to handle.
"No… My parents are alive there. Dad was never hokage."
"Oh."
Iruka looked like he wanted to say more, but Naruto hurriedly launched himself into a description of the orphanage instead. Maybe he wasn't as subtle as he thought, because Iruka didn't mention his parents again. Of course, it didn't take long for him to start talking about Sasuke again. It made him wonder if he always talked this much about Sasuke, or if it was just because Iruka was Iruka, and he didn't seem to mind.
"It's strange to imagine Sasuke chasing after girls," Iruka mused, mouth twitching at the corner. "I can't believe our Sasuke took that well."
"Yeah, but I think his fangirls were told not to bother our Sasuke, because we didn't have much trouble with them after the first few days. They were arguing about whose turn it was to go on a date with him, but the whole time we were there he didn't seem to care about them at all."
"Well, if he was dating Menma, maybe they were just a cover?"
Gaping at him, Naruto furiously tried to remember if Charasuke had mentioned anything about it. He'd sort of figured he was busy with everything happening, and he could tell that he cared about Menma. Now that he thought about it, it did kind of sound like he'd been dating those girls while dating Menma, which made sense because other people had mentioned that, hadn't they? He couldn't imagine being okay with letting his Sasuke do that.
"Huh. I think at first I thought he was just going on dates with anyone, like, he wasn't so serious about Menma. But they, I mean, I think Menma broke up with him. And he was really upset when he disappeared."
"Have you asked Menma about it?"
"…no?" He frowned, sucking on his lips. "I guess people didn't really know about it. But why wouldn't they tell people? Literally everyone was gay over there."
Iruka snorted out a laugh, possibly because of the weird face Naruto was making. It was just so strange! It was like he'd never even met a gay person before, and suddenly he was surrounded by them.
"What about me, then? Did I have a handsome boyfriend?" Iruka asked, mirth glittering in his eyes.
"What? No! I mean, I don't know, but I didn't see anyone."
"What a shame."
Naruto squinted at him in suspicion. He seemed way too amused over the topic.
"At least you have a handsome boyfriend now," Iruka continued, causing Naruto to splutter.
Face burning bright red, Naruto glared at the other man. There was a strange, fuzzy feeling inside his chest.
Can we talk about something other than Sasuke, Kurama sighed. Every day you wake up and decide to obsess over him.
Go away! Naruto yelled inside his head, crossing his arms and leaning back, as if a little more distance would make Iruka stop grinning at him like that.
His handsome face, his handsome hair, how handsome he looks in this or that shirt, how his eyes are bottomless pools of velvety night sky…
I DON'T THINK LIKE THAT-
How pretty his dick is, how much you want to squeeze his ass-
Naruto stood up, slapping his hands over his ears.
"Do you have any idea," he told Iruka, groaning desperately, "how annoying it is to have a demon fox inside me when all he does every day is say stupid shit and make fun of me over Sasuke?"
"You- You talk to it?" Iruka asked, surprised. "It teases you about Sasuke?"
"He's awful."
I'm a delight.
"He thinks he's so funny."
I'm incredibly funny. You try being stuck inside a horny teenage boy!
I'm ignoring you.
I don't know what's worse, you drooling over Sasuke when he's in the room or you moping around because he isn't.
"I did hear some stories about what it was like on the battlefield… You mean he can talk to you anytime he wants?"
Iruka looked far more troubled than Naruto thought he should.
"What?"
"No, maybe it's nothing…" Iruka hesitated, scratching at his chin. "I think most people are convinced you've got the kyuubi fully under control. If he's teasing you about Sasuke it's probably fine, but people might worry that he's influencing you somehow."
"Only to be a pervert," Naruto blurted out before he could stop himself. He let out another groan, falling face first onto his arms over the table. "So, what, now people might think both Sasuke and Kurama are telling me to do evil things or something?"
Define evil, Kurama said, and Naruto could just feel him snickering.
"Hmm." Iruka crossed his arms and leaned against the table, face dipping closer to Naruto. "Personally, I think if they haven't convinced you to go rogue yet it probably won't happen, but if I didn't know you I might be a little worried."
Ha. It's like they forget that Konoha was much worse towards you than he and I ever was and would deserve it.
"Why would I go rogue?" Naruto asked, frowning.
"Rumors," Iruka shrugged. "You were gone long enough. And things have been retold so many times since the war that no one's sure what's the truth anymore. Not everyone will agree with a hokage whose closest influencers are a bijuu who attacked the village and a former S-rank criminal who killed Danzo and tried to kill the kages."
Naruto sighed.
"When you say it like that, it sounds bad. And completely erases what the village did to Sasuke and Kurama."
"You'll just have to show them they can trust you, even if they don't agree with everything. I believe in you, you know."
Smiling into his arms, Naruto allowed Iruka to ruffle his hair. He knew not everyone understood how he could forgive Sasuke and Kurama, but in a way, Kurama was right. The village had hurt him more. Without Iruka, he's not sure he could have made it through. And without Sasuke, he's not sure he would have found it worth it to fight so hard, to go so far, to risk everything for a village that hadn't done much for either of them. If you force an animal into a cage, it will want to escape… His smile dimmed. He didn't like thinking about the past. He didn't like remembering how the people who now greeted him with joy, had once stared at him like he was a monster. And he did remember them. He knew them all, could see their eyes haunting him if he wanted to.
But he couldn't just blame them for everything and be done with it. He'd learnt early on, that people who were meant to protect you could do you harm, and people who were trying to kill you could touch your soul in ways you'd never imagined possible.
It was never as easy as right or wrong.
Suddenly, the task he'd taken upon himself seemed insurmountable.
"But how?" he asked. "How can I show them that, if I can't even tell them the truth?"
Silence fell in the room. Outside, the sun was starting to set, people milling about on the streets below. So many new people had moved to Konoha the past year, some to help with restorations, some in search for a new home. He wondered what they thought of him, when he passed them in the streets. Did they think Konoha was a safe place to live? Were they anticipating a long period of peace, or could they feel that things were still difficult?
He thought of Konohamaru, and how awkward things were between them. Would he still support Naruto, when Sasuke came back? How long would it take before the village found out, even if he didn't say anything out loud?
"I don't want to hide my relationship with Sasuke," he muttered, swallowing the lump in his throat as he waited for Iruka to say something.
"Naruto…" Iruka's hand landed on his arm, squeezing gently. "Some things are more important than other people's opinion. One thing I've realized as I get older is that people will always have an opinion, and it doesn't have to rule your life. Of course, it's not easy. But if they don't care about your happiness or wellbeing, their opinion isn't worth anything."
"It's hard," he confessed. "It's so hard, sometimes, you know? I thought about staying in the other dimension. For Sasuke."
"We'll think of something." When Naruto glanced up at him, he was smiling softly. "You're not alone."
But he still felt alone. Without his connection to Sasuke, he felt so empty. He attempted a smile, and Iruka too pity on him, dropping the subject. A while later, after Iruka had left, he walked over to his open kitchen window and leaned against the windowsill, staring down at the few people passing by below him. He missed him like a physical ache in his chest.
He stood there, until the sun disappeared below the horizon, darkness enveloping the village. He didn't notice the slight chill in the air. His thoughts were far away, travelling through the years to his Academy days. Passing by Sasuke as he sat on the dock, alone like him. How their eyes would meet in silent understanding. How he longed to reach for him, and couldn't.
Kurama stayed silent, and Naruto was thankful for it. He needed some time to gather his thoughts.
Only when overcome by tiredness, eyes blearily fighting to keep the streetlights in focus, did he slowly make his way to bed.
I feel like I should say something profound and deep after ending the chapter with such a depressed Naruto, but I can't think of anything. Also there's a chunky little dog playing in the snow outside my window.
I re-read the entire story before writing this chapter. If you did that too before reading this, you're a real champ. How did this story end up so long?
I wrote a lot of things between last chapter and this. Two Naruto oneshots, two star trek oneshots, updated Lessons in love, wrote a yoi oneshot, reposted a bunch of stuff from onto ao3... Sometimes I take very long to update and that's because I'm easily distracted. This fic lives rent free in my brain and I think about it almost daily, it's just difficult to write it sometimes because I forget how many stupid jokes I can add to distract my brain from realizing I have to add plot too. Next chapter is going to be 100% serious. Not sure how I'll manage but hope is the last thing that leaves us humans.
You know, sometimes people accuse me of writing slow burns. I just want you to know that I practice what I preach. 2.5 years after our first tinder date, I finally got together officially with my now-girlfriend. I'd tell you the details but she has my ao3 and who knows what she'll do with it. (Probably not read this fic. She barely knows that Naruto exists as a concept. Unclear how this will work out. She also suggested we get married in the bone chapel in Prague. Still not entirely sure that was a joke.)
Anyway, I probably forgot half of what I meant to say. Thank you as always for all the sweet and thoughtful reviews you give me, and sorry for sometimes being extremely slow at replying. If you want to say something and worry about what to say, feel free to just send me a simple smiley. If you worry that your comment is too long or too much or just worry in general, know that I love you and appreciate you. If you never comment, you are also valid.
Hope you're all staying safe and taking care of yourselves!