A/N: I know it's been a while. I have been busy working away for a publishing company and it hasn't left me with much free time. But I am working away on my chapters for different stories. I have now completed writing and editing all of the chapters for Overcoming the Darkness and I will be posting once a week on Sundays, yay! I am going to be writing within the Chicago PD Fandom for a bit so I am going to be working on Discovering a Legend next. That story was only meant to be three chapters long, so I will get the last two chapters written for it before I start to post it. That series, Black Ops Security, is meant to be made up of short two to three chapter stories around forty thousand words or less that will feature different cases that bring Jay's company and Intelligence together, and also Upstead!
Once I have those two chapters written then I will be bouncing around a bit between A City At War, Warrior Scars and A Brotherhood Betrayal. So within the month of May you can expect some updates for those stories as well. I know everyone is anxious for me to get my stories going and get them completed. I am working on them, I write in multiple fandoms, so I have to try and balance them all out. It doesn't help that most of my stories are long so it's not like I can wrap them up within ten chapters and a call it a day. But I am working on them and you can expect some updates to hopefully your favorite stories.
Chapter 3
Jay and Hailey made their way out of the locker room and Jay went over and grabbed one of the whiteboards and brought it over to the other one. At the top he wrote Survivors as he spoke.
"Will, can you check my phone? Mouse said he would send me through the intel he's able to gather for the other survivors."
"Yup." Will said, as he went and got the phone as Jay started to write down all of the names.
"You know all of their names?" Kim asked, gently.
"They sent us all to the same hospital afterwards. I had Mouse checking in with the others to see how they were doing. They are all over though and I haven't seen or heard about them since I was discharged."
"It's a lot of people to try and track down. How are we gonna do it? We only have access to local records." Kevin said.
"Military laptops will be able to give you the last known addresses that the military has on them, but it's still going to be a bit of work to track them down. Mouse has an algorithm that he's using to scan every social media page, photo and employment record to find them. We might want to focus on finding the Ghosts and leave Mouse to hunt down these guys." Jay answered.
"Agreed. Let Mouse's program do the work. We need to focus on finding who killed Matthews. If this is the Ghosts or someone using them as a scapegoat, we need to find them before these people get hurt." Voight agreed.
"The biggest problem is the motive. Why are they going after the survivors?" Hailey said.
"Maybe they were involved somehow in getting them captured or rescued." Adam supplied.
"Maybe it's not about that at all." Will suggested.
"Maybe you should leave the investigating work to the cops." Rojas said, dismissing Will.
"Whether it's the Ghosts or someone else hiding behind them, this feels personal. They could have gone after the other survivors that were overseas before coming here. But whoever this is, they came here. They killed Bulldog as their first kill. They picked Chicago and they wrote Jay's name on the wall. They called him out. This feels more personal." Will said, ignoring Rojas completely.
"He's got a point. They could have killed everyone that wasn't in Chicago before getting here. They started here, they left Jay's name in the victim's blood. That screams hard feelings to me." Adam commented.
"Say it is the Ghosts, is there a reason they would be targeting you Jay?" Kevin asked.
"They asked me to join their unit, but I turned them down. I've never done anything to go against them and not long after that meeting I was being sent on the tour from hell."
"And who are the Ghosts?" Platt asked, trying to get the full picture.
Jay finished writing down the last survivor's name before he gave Platt his full attention. "They were a specialised unit within the military. They were a rumor, just whispers that people would talk about around a fire. No one truly believed it, it seemed crazy to think that the military would have a unit like that. They were said to be allowed to do anything they wanted as long as they got results. They would be sent into hostile areas and kill everyone within the village. They were allowed to torture anyone, men, women, children, everything was up for grabs for them as long as they got the results. They were a five man unit that met with me one night. They wanted me to join them. I turned them down gently and carefully."
"At the risk of sounding like an asshole, why you?" Adam asked.
Jay didn't answer, instead he went over and picked up the copy of the classification debriefing contract that the others had just signed. He read through it as the others were quiet. They weren't sure what Jay was doing, but they figured it had to be something for him to be looking through the document. After a moment Jay put the paper back down and spoke.
"My Ranger unit was a black ops unit. We did the missions that were deemed too dangerous for other Ranger units. I was the backup medic for my unit, I was their leader, their sniper, I also have my helicopter licence."
"So you checked a lot of boxes." Platt said.
"I did. I suspected that they were after something. That there was something they were planning, but I don't think they wanted me because they needed a sixth man. They had a sniper, but he could only shoot up to three thousand yards. It's impressive, but I suspected they needed someone that could make a longer shot."
"And you can shoot how far?" Adam asked.
"I hold the record for the longest shot in the world, still to this day. Forty-two hundred yards. I've also made multiple kill shots off a ricochet."
"Damn." Kevin said impressed.
"So that's why they wanted you. They needed a better sniper. Do you remember hearing about anything that you thought could be connected to them after your meeting?" Hailey asked.
She knew that Jay had more skills than he showed, then he needed to show. They weren't at war, they were on the streets of Chicago and it wasn't like Jay needed to be a sniper all day long. He didn't have to shoot that far, but that didn't change that Hailey knew he had more skills than she had seen.
"I don't know. I was sent on tour three weeks later. I can look into it and see if something matches up."
"Alright, according to Mouse he was able to find ten people so far." Will said, as he went over to the whiteboard and picked up a marker. He started to write down the information that Mouse had been able to find. "All ten are dead, but it looks like they were all self-inflicted. Three were overdoses from heroin, they had been using since they got out of the hospital. Four were suicides, they left a note and it was confirmed that it was their writing and sounded like their own voice that had written it. One was killed in a bar fight. He got drunk and started the fight that turned into a brawl. The last two died from complications of alcoholism."
"Wow." Kim said, sadly.
"It's the stats that people don't talk about. Veterans are more at risk of addiction and suicide and that gets worse if they experience something traumatic." Will explained.
"Those guys were there longer than me. It wouldn't surprise me if most are dead by their own hand." Jay said.
"You made it through though, some of them might have as well." Platt said.
"I had Mouse. He lived with me, he wouldn't leave me alone. If I had been left alone to deal with it, I would have been dead."
That statement had everyone looking at Jay. To hear that he would have killed himself if he had been alone when he returned told them that it had been really bad for him. Will wasn't surprised. He knew that Jay had been through a lot and he had been struggling when he returned. He knew from Mouse that he was worried about leaving Jay alone. He knew that Jay had been drinking his days away once he felt physically well enough too. The only reason he had stopped was because Mouse had been there to keep him from going over the edge. He had been able to help Jay find something else that he could do that could get him out of bed everyday. Something that made him want to fight for a better life. Will was worried about how well Jay would handle having all of these painful and traumatic memories being brought up all over again.
"Those that weren't there that long stand a better chance of making a full recovery. We'll know how many are still alive when Mouse's computer finishes finding them." Will said, trying to get the conversation back on track.
Jay spoke as he went over to one of the empty whiteboards and started to write the names of the Ghosts on the board. "The leader was a Seal, David Rollins. Their sniper was Delta, Chris Anderson. Their medic was a Ranger Jaun Tapric. Their pilot was Air Force, Brian Novac. And finally their master interrogator and tech com specialist was a Marine, Steve Holland."
"Who's the weak link?" Voight asked.
"Holland. He was kept out of the field and worked in command. He likes to torture peple to get the intel he needs from them, but he's not a strong hand to hand fighter and he's not much of a gunner. His ability to torture anyone from old men to young children was what made him perfect for the unit. He even tortured a pregnant woman who was seven months along. The mother lived, but the torture killed the baby. Rumor has it, he has a tattoo of the experience on him that he wears like a badge of honor."
"Lovely." Kim said, sarcastically.
"What is their normal MO? We gonna find them all together?" Platt asked.
"They follow the basic rules of Black Special Ops. Only one person is allowed to know where you are at all times. Each member only knows the location of another. It's done that way so the whole team doesn't become compromised if one person is grabbed. But, if we find one, that person can lead us to the next and so forth." Jay explained.
"Ok so we find Holland and he will lead us down the line. Which means we gotta take them alive. What do we do with them once we have them?" Hailey asked.
"Keep them in chains so they can't escape and hope we can get them to talk. But again, this is all assuming that they are even in the city and are the ones behind this. We still don't have a clear motive and no real evidence that points us in their direction. This could be something completely different." Jay said.
"But your gut says it's them." Will easily stated.
"Everyone knew what the basic ensignia for the Ghosts looked like, but as far as I know I am the only one to actually see it. What people don't know is that this part right here." Jay said, pointing to the bottom part of the ensignia before he continued. "People don't know about it. It's always left out. My guess, they did it on purpose so they would always know if someone was trying to blame them for something they didn't do."
"Their way of knowing if they were being set up. So if no one but them and you know about it, then we have to assume it is them and they are looking to target you by going for the biggest pain point." Hailey said.
"Maybe there are hard feelings about you turning them down." Kim suggested.
Jay just gave a shrug, because he really didn't know why they had a problem with him. He hadn't done anything against them. He had only interacted with them that one time and they parted on what Jay could only assume were good terms. They didn't try and get him to join them again. Jay figured they would have moved on to someone else, especially once word got out that he had been captured.
"Chances are we won't know why until after we catch one of them. Let's focus on these five and find everything we can on them. When Mouse gets here tomorrow he might have more we can work with." Voight ordered.
The others gave a nod and everyone spread out to start their own research to try and track down any intel on their five suspects. Will sat next to Jay and helped him gather intel from one of the military laptops. He might not be a detective, but he knew how to do research from the millions of medical papers he had to write. It wasn't medically related, but research was research and it was all the same process. He was going to be there for Jay through all of this and everything that came after.
XXX
It was nearing nine o'clock at night when the team finally decided to call it a night, they were all exhausted and running on fumes. They had been combing through endless amounts of intel trying to track down five ghosts. They were coming up empty for the most part, not that any of them expected a quick turnaround in this case. They were military trained assassins that lived in the shadows. They were not going to be easy to find and they were going to have to dig through a lot of intel to find a real trace of them.
"Alright, I'm calling it. Everyone go home and be back here for eight. Jay, I don't think you and Will should be going to your place." Voight started.
"If they wanted to kill me, I would be dead by now." Jay pointed out.
"Still, we don't need to test that theory. Everyone should be doubled up." Voight ordered.
"I'll stay with you. I ain't staying with any of these rift rafts." Platt instantly said.
"I can crash with Adam." Kim said, as she looked over at Adam who gave a nod to confirm.
"Rojas, why don't you stay with Kev, then Jay and Will can crash with me." Hailey suggested.
"You sure? That puts you in the line of fire if they show up." Rojas said, not happy about the idea of Hailey being around Jay right now.
"I agree with Jay, if they wanted him dead he would have been killed by now. They took out Bulldog with a sniper round, they could have picked him off at any point within the past week or before. They want to save him for last." Hailey said with complete confidence.
"Good, it's decided then. Get out of here." Voight ordered. He was not looking to have an argument right now. Today had been long enough and he needed a drink or three.
They all gathered their things and started to make their way out. Hailey and Will got into Jay's truck and Jay started to drive towards his apartment so he could pick up some clothes to keep at Hailey's until this case was wrapped up.
"Where did you go this morning?" Hailey asked, she couldn't believe it had only been one freaking day.
"What?" Jay asked, slightly confused. They both could tell that Jay had already slipped away into his mind and both briefly wondered if Jay driving was a good idea.
"This morning you were late. You said you had some good news." Hailey prompted.
"Oh right. I ah, I bought a house in the country."
"Dude, you bought a house? I didn't even know you were looking." Will said, with a warm smile.
"Ya, my lease is going to be up in six months. I had been thinking about getting a condo, but none felt right and I didn't like how populated the buildings were. An old buddy of mine from the Army is a relator and he showed me a few places that he had. I liked the one piece of land, it all went through this morning."
"Where is it? What's it look like?" Hailey asked.
"It's on the outskirts, about thirty minutes from town. Twenty acres of land with an old barn, a house and a guest house. They need work, but the land is really nice. I can work on the house and get it ready for when my lease is up."
"I look forward to seeing it. What's the area like?" Hailey asked.
She was proud and happy for Jay. She knew he didn't really like living in his apartment, but she also knew he didn't know what to do about any of it. She had often felt like he wasn't a city boy any longer or maybe had never been. She had seen how hard some of the nights were for him. Jay being able to have his own house, his own land where it could be quiet, it would be really good for him.
"It's quiet. The houses are a couple miles apart. It's mostly farmland. It'll be nice when the house is finished. The structure is sound and all of the plumbing and electrical are good, it's just a mess on the inside."
"When this case is over you'll have to take us to see it." Will said with a supportive smile. He knew that Jay would end up in the country one day. He always loved being out in the woods camping or fishing. He was an outdoorsy guy, him having a house in the country just made sense.
"Ya." Jay said, slightly distracted and both Hailey and Will stayed quiet for the rest of the drive.
They knew he was having problems right now and they didn't need to try and keep him talking. Sometimes it was better to just let Jay be quiet and off in his own world. It was a good thirty minutes later when they arrived at Hailey's apartment. They all got out and headed inside as Hailey spoke.
"Will, you can crash in Rojas' room and Jay if it's ok with you, you can sleep in my room with me."
"You sure?" Jay asked not wanting to make Hailey feel uncomfortable.
"Ya, I'm sure." Hailey said with a warm smile.
She knew she could have had Jay sleeping on the couch, but she didn't want him away from her. He was her best friend and she couldn't see why they couldn't share a bed.
"Alright, well if it's alright with you both I think I'll take a shower and get to bed." Will said.
"Ya of course. Towels are in the closet by the bathroom and Rojas' room is up the stairs and the last room down the hallway." Hailey said.
Will gave a nod and headed up. He was tired and he knew that Jay was going to have some nightmares tonight. He wanted to get some sleep before Jay started to have nightmares. Hailey looked over at Jay and she could tell he was tired, but also feeling a bit out of place. He had been over at her place many times before without an issue, but this time was different. Normally Jay slept on the couch on the rare times he slept over at all. This time he would be sleeping in her bed and even though neither of them said anything about sex, it still felt intimate and personal. Hailey knew she would have to be the one to make the first move though, Jay was too much of a gentleman to do it and his mind was to far gone tonight to truly focus on anything. Hailey went over and placed her hand within Jay's as she spoke.
"Come on, it's been a long day."
Hailey brought Jay upstairs and into her room. Jay placed his bag down and Hailey let go of his hand so she could go and grab some pajamas to sleep in. Jay watched as Hailey headed into her on-suite bathroom to get changed and he managed to grab some black sweat pants from his bag and quickly got changed. Once he was changed, he went over to the window and he couldn't help but look out at the moving city all around them. At one point when he had returned from his last tour, he loved the sound of a moving city. It was better than the silence or screams that he had grown used to. Seeing the life of a city had brought a peace, but more and more it was getting to be suffocating. It felt like he was never alone, that there was no peace and quiet to calm his racing thoughts. The sounds of a car backfiring or fire crackers, fire works, all of it had the power to send him into a spiral of memories that he woud rather forget. It was that need for quiet that made him decide to look for a house with some land. He knew being thirty minutes out of the city wouldn't be best for work. He would be the last on scene if a new case came in, but he also knew that Voight wouldn't be too upset over it. They had talked previously about the noise of the city sometimes being too much for him, so Jay knew Voight would understand him getting his own place on the outskirts. It was supposed to be a good day. Jay had been happy and excited to tell Hailey about his new place, to get to show her it after work. Now it felt like this morning was months ago and Jay honestly had no idea how he was ever going to get back to that feeling that he had when he woke up this morning.
Jay had lost himself within the passing of the car lights and the noise of the street below. He didn't even notice that Hailey had come out of the bathroom until he felt her hands on his bare chest as she pressed her chest against his back. She pressed a kiss in between his shoulder blades as she spoke.
"You with me?"
"Ah… ya. Ya." Jay said, and Hailey could tell he was getting his mind to snap back.
She knew that it was going to be a hard night for him, but she was determined to be there for him through it all. He had been through so much, more so than she even knew about and she knew it was going to take him a lot of time to be able to get back to who he used to be, but Hailey didn't care. She was going to be there for him through everything, no matter how long it took. He wasn't just her partner and best friend, she loved him. He was the man that she loved and nothing was ever going to change that. She placed her hand over his heart as she spoke again.
"You're gonna be ok Jay. We'll get through this together."
"I don't know if there is an ok after all of this." Jay softly admitted.
"I know it feels that way, but there will be. I'm not letting you slip away." Hailey promised.
She knew that things were going to be bad, but she was ready for it. She was ready for whatever came their way because she wasn't going to let him slip off into the darkness. This wasn't something he was going to be able to beat on his own and that was a conversation they were going to have to have once they captured the Ghosts. Jay couldn't heal properly from what happened to him alone, he was going to have to go back into therapy so he could properly heal from his trauma. It was something Hailey was going to need to speak to him about once this was over. Once he seemed more ready for that conversation. Jay gently grabbed Hailey's hand that was over his heart and brought it up to his mouth, placing a kiss to the inside of her wrist. He turned around and Hailey ran her hand down Jay's chest and over the fainted scars that made up his torso. She had seen him with his shirt off on numerous occasions. He always slept with it off, so she had seen him plenty of times, but she had never touched him before. Hailey couldn't resist moving closer. She knew this was going to be a bad idea, but she also knew this was something that Jay needed, that they both needed. Tonight was about comfort and they could figure out what came after tonight once the Ghosts were handled.
Hailey moved closer and closed the small gap between their bodies. She moved up onto her tip toes and slowly pressed her lips against Jay's. She felt him freeze for a second before his body responded and he was issing her back. Jay bent forward a bit so Hailey was no longer up on her tip toes. He placed his one hand on her lower back while the other went to the side of her face as he deepened the kiss. The kiss quickly turned passionate an dheated from their desire that had been locked away for so long. They both had wanted this for a long time now and now that it was happening, neither of them were backing down now or holding back. When the need for more became too great they both started to remove the other's broke the kiss long enough to get Hailey's shirt over her head. Once the shirt was removed Jay started to kiss along her neck and Hailey couldn't help but moan at the contact. She rocked her hips against his, causing them both to moan deeply as their need for the other grew. Jay moved his hands to Hailey's ass and easily picked her up. Hailey wrapped her legs around Jay's hips as he brought them over to the bed.
Jay laid Hailey down against her pillows as he kissed down her neck to each breast and then down her stomach to her pussy. Hailey moaned and she twined her fingers into Jay's hair as he started to lick and suck at her wet pusst. Jay couldn't help, but think about how he had never tasted something so sweet and the sounds Hailey was making were driving him crazy.
"Oh God Jay." Hailey moaned and Jay knew she wasn't going to last much longer.
He continued on what he was doing and only a minute later Hailey was screaming his name as he tasted her sweet juices on his tongue. When he felt her stop pulsing he kissed his way back up her body. When he was close enough Hailey pulled him intp a heated kiss as she flipped them so she was on top. She easily straddled his lap and Jay placed his arm around her lower back and sat up so their chests were pressed against each other. Hailey lifted her hips just enough to be able to slide Jay's hard cock inside of her. She didn't go slow, she took him down to his base and only then did she stop. They both broke the kiss slightly as they both gave a deep moan as their bodies finally connected after all of this didn't move for a minute, he just let them enjoy the feeling and letting Hailey adjust to his size. He lightly kissed her lips and once Hailey was ready she slowly started to move. They both were moaning and Jay ran his hands all over Hailey's body. He couldn't believe that they were finally doing this, that it was happening. Her body felt amazing against his own and Jay never wated this feeling to end.
Once she had adjusted well enough to Jay's size Hailey had picked up her pace and they both couldn't stop moaning. The need to feel more, to go deeper, was too strong in either of them. Jay used his arm that was around Hailey's hips and quickly flipped them once again so Hailey was laying on her back with her head resting on the pillows with Jay on top of her. She kept her legs wrapped around his hips as Jay started to thrust faster and deeper within her.
"Oh fuck, Jay. Oh god, don't stop." Hailey moaned, as she arched her back slightly.
Jay picked up the pace and before they both knew it they were pounding against each other just trying to get Jay even deeper inside of Hailey. They were both a moaning and sweaty mess and they loved every single second of it. Hailey had already came once and she was about to cum for a sexond time. They were both close and after a few more deep thrusts it send Hailey over the edge as he called out Jay's name. Jay couldn't help but groan at the added tightness and feeling Hailey pulse around his cock. The added sensation only added to his pleasure and after a few more thrusts, Jay snapped his hips forward as he came hard deep inside of Hailey. They were both breathing heavily as their bodies continued to pulse around the other. Jay pressed his forehead against Hailey's as his body slowly started to come back down. Once he felt like he could breathe again he started to lightly kiss Hailey as she fought to get her own breathing back under control. This had been exactly what they both needed after the day they had. Neither of them knew what would happen moving forward, but for now they were going to focus on the love they shared for the other to get them through this case.
XXX
Hailey's eyes snapped open as her ability to take in oxygen was cut off. She had no idea what was going on, but she didn't expect to look up to see Jay straddling her with his hands wrapped around her neck. She could see that his eyes were blank and off in a distance. He wasn't here with her. Hailey knew that he was in the middle of a nightmare and he had no idea what he was doing.
"نور چیرته دي؟" (Where are the others?)
"J..ay." Hailey barely managed to get out as the need to breathe was growing.
She started to scratch and hit at his hands. She was doing everything she could to get him to wake up or to get him off of her. The problem was, Jay had some serious strength behind him and he knew how to lock his hands around someone's throat. As the black dots started to dance in front of her eyes, she reached over to her bedside table and tried to grab the lamp to hit Jay with, but her hands fumbled and it fell to the floor, making a loud crashing sound as it shattered. With the last bit of strength that Hailey had, she started to buck her hips up, trying to throw Jay off balance and hopefully get him to wake up. Everything Hailey tried wasn't working and Jay kept repeating the same sentence over and over again, getting louder as he said it. Hailey was losing strength and she knew that if she didn't get Jay off of her or woken up soon, she would be dead and that wasn't something she could allow Jay to live with. Hailey continued to use every ounce of strength she had to get Jay off of her, but nothing she did worked. Just when she thought this was going to be it for her, her bedroom door was slammed open and Will came running over to them.
"Jay, you gotta wake up." Will said, as he wrapped an arm around Jay's torso from behind and held smelling salts underneath his nose.
Will held on as Jay did what he expected and started to move around to get away from the scent. He would also perceive Will as a danger until his mind woke back up. It only took a few seconds, but to both Will and Hailey it felt like hours before Jay's mind finally woke up. Hailey could see it, the very instant his mind returned to his body. The look of absolute horror that filled his eyes as he realised he was strangling Hailey, his partner and the woman he loved. Jay pulled his hands back as if they were on fire and quickly got off the bed. The second Jay's hands were removed Hailey started coughing and she sat up, bringing her hand up to her neck. She could still feel Jay's hands around her neck and she was confident she would never be able to forget that feeling. Will was instantly in front of her and gently moved her hand away as he started to look her over.
"Try and take slow breaths." Will advised.
He gently pressed along her neck to see if anything felt broken. He knew that Jay was going to feel horrible for what he had just done, but he couldn't have stopped this. He was in the middle of a nightmare, he had no idea what was going on. Will wanted to go over to Jay and comfort him, but he had to make sure Hailey was alright first. He had to make sure that nothing was broken or that her throat wouldn't swell up on her. He knew it was going to bruise and be bruised for a good two weeks, but that was nothing compared to what could be wrong. He looked at her eyes and he didn't see any petechial hemorrhaging, a good sign. Nothing felt broken under his fingers and there wasn't any swelling yet. He was confident that she would be fine, but it would be sore come morning and be badly bruised.
"You're ok, there's no damage. It'll be sore and bruised up real good come morning, but nothing feels broken and you don't have any bleeding in your eyes." Will said, as Hailey finally managed to stop coughing.
"Thanks." Hailey said with a hoarse voice.
She looked over and saw that Jay was sitting on the floor with his back up against the wall and his knees up. She could see him crying and she knew that he was feeling a great deal of guilt for his actions. Hailey was instantly getting up, being thankful that her and Jay managed to put some clothes back on before they fell asleep, and making her way over to him. She didn't even hesitate for a second before she got down on the ground and straddled Jay's lap and pulled him in for a hug. Jay instantly wrapped his arms around her as he spoke.
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."
"Shhh, it's ok." Hailey started, as she wrapped her arms around Jay's head and held him close to her as he cried into her shoulder. "You didn't know. You were asleep. I'm ok, I'm ok."
Jay continued to cry into her shoulder and he kept repeating that he was sorry. He couldn't believe he had done this Hailey. That he had almost killed her with his own two hands. He was horrified and he felt a deep sense of guilt and shame for his own actions. The fact that he was asleep didn't ease his guilt at all. He still believed it never should have happened. He was meant to keep Hailey safe, not hurt her or put her at risk and that was exactly what he had done tonight. He thought maybe he would be able to get through all of this with her by his side. He thought maybe there was a real chance still for the both of them to be together, but now he knew the truth. He knew they could never be in a relationship, that he would never be good enough for her. If he couldn't keep her safe while they slept in the same bed, then he didn't deserve her. What happened tonight between them could never happen again. He could never allow it to happen again. He would stop the Ghosts and then he would distance himself from Hailey, from everyone he loved, so he wouldn't drag them down with him. It was the only way to keep them safe from him and that was exactly what he was going to do.