TORTURE WARNING: SEVERE.

"NO! STOP!" I screamed slamming my hand into the ground over and over as Gothmog moved over to the red-haired beautiful one he called Maitimo. I felt sickness roiling in my gut and pain emanating sharply in what felt like hundreds of places. It wasn't fair. He saved me.

I was stuck leaning over onto my hands and knees from where I was discarded, in too much pain to move much, except to hit my hand on the ground. I was ignored by both as Gothmog forcibly pulled him up by his bindings.

"PLEASE STOP. DON'T HURT HIM. PLEASE" I wailed forcing myself into a better bow like how Tar-Mairon made us learn.

"Do not dare to bow to him in my place" I looked up in horror at the hoarse, but stern words. He was glaring at me with unyielding silvery eyes that seemed to hold endless sadness, regret, and hatred. Maybe he didn't understand how much pain Gothmog could inflict on him or he wouldn't say such a foolish thing.

"Stubborn as ever, son of Feanor" Gothmog said yanking up each of his arms one at a time and binding them to more chains on the ceiling far apart from each other and high enough that his toes could barely brush the ground. I shivered in pity seeing how taut and contorted his arm and shoulder muscles looked hanging far apart like that. He was beautiful anyway. Maybe almost as beautiful as Tar-Mairon despite the obvious malnourishment and old injury scars. He had what seemed like an endless amount of raised whip scars across his back and even on his chest and legs.

I tried to dismiss my momentarily selfish panic about whether or not my back and feet would end up permanently scarring like that. I wasn't beautiful like him, it would ruin me. A little noise of hysteria bubbled past my lips at such superficial thoughts in the middle of a crisis caused by me.

The sudden appearance of what looked a whip, solely made out of fire, caused me to start screaming and cover my eyes. I could feel the heat emanating off of it all the way over here.

"How original" He spat sarcastically at Gothmog despite the pain he was about to feel. I almost couldn't believe what I was hearing. He won't even try to avoid or lessen it? I was also surprised Gothmog didn't respond to him verbally. I refused to look, but I could hear the crack of the whip and hear what sounded like sizzling. Oh please, don't be skin. I kept my hands tightly over my eyes and tried hard not to panic. This was all my fault.

"Airawende, open your eyes. You'll make us stay here longer." Gothmog said tonelessly. I pressed my hands really hard into my temples instead trying not completely lose my mind to panic and guilt. He was hitting him so hard, but there was very little blood. It was like the wound was being cauterized as it was struck from the heat, but the skin seemed off and almost melted together after a few seconds. It was more horrible then being struck myself. I was never hit like this or with fire. I was clenching my head so hard and crying pitifully. I would behave perfectly now, he didn't need to do this.

I let out a little whimper and wished I was anywhere else. I would even take being trapped here somewhere else. I want Haldamire. I can't survive here with him alone. I can't survive here at all.

"Please don't hit him anymore" I choked out past my tears and clogged voice. "It was my fault. All my fault" I sobbed. I screamed when he cried out, but I think he lasted a long time managing to stay silent. I almost wasn't prepared for the pain in his voice. It was so deep and raw pushing past what sounded like damaged vocal cords rough from not being used or maybe being used too much.

"Don't hit him. Don't hit him" Gothmog said, nearly taking what sounded like a mocking tone, pulling the whip back and making it disappear "Then you would have me do something else." I didn't even know how to respond to that so I shook my head terrified.

I looked up at Maitimo terrified at his pained scoff in response. He was more stupid then I was to be so openly defiant. I shook my head frantically at him pleading with my eyes for him to shut up. He was going to make this so much worse.

"Well, if you both insist on challenging on my creative side" he smiled pulling out a knife. I don't even know to describe the resigned horrified noise that issued from my throat as I fell over onto my side. I writhed and jerked a moment after some of my side wounds touched the ground, but didn't right myself.

"Don't believe it's your fault. They would do it anyway" came the raspy voice of Maitimo. I covered my ears in disbelief missing Gothmog's response if he said anything. We literally would not be here right now if wasn't for me.

I screamed as one of my hands was yanked away from my ear violently. "Don't do that Airawende or you might miss the screaming" I reached for his arm managing to catch his wrist and tug lightly.

"Please don't anymore. You don't have to. I swear I'll do whatever you say. Please" I whispered pleadingly.

"Oh, I know you will" He pulled his arm from my hand and I let it flop back against my body in despair.

"Since we are all here because of Airawende, how about I start with her name" He said wrapping his hand around the knife blade. I could see glowing red and orange between his fingers and narrowed my eyes at it confused. Then he let go and the blade was still glowing bright red and I realized what he actually meant. I let out a wail and covered my eyes again, until he said that if I did that one more time he would do everything twice.

I could see Maitimo straining and gritting his teeth against the pain as Gothmog ran the cherry heated blade into his skin and started. I felt sick to my stomach and tried to suppress it. I shook my head rapidly, but that only made it worse. The last straw was when he screamed. I couldn't stop myself.

"Really Airawende? You are truly that weak. Perhaps Mairon had a point, but I can't leave poor Maitimo here with only half a mark" He was only on the second A in my name. It was so awful to think about Maitimo getting my name permanently scarred into his skin. It was all my fault. Even worse that he saved me when I first came here. What if Haldamire is next? I shook violently refusing to cover my eyes again in case he followed through with his threat. Which knowing him was a definite possibility. I could see him straining not to cry out again, but he couldn't help it sometimes. Almost like Gothmog intentionally went deeper in some places to illicit a reaction like that. I shook in relief when he finished the final e and tried to look away from the final result. Somehow the guilt made me look and take in what I had caused. Nausea started raising again and I covered my mouth hoping I didn't throw up again.

"You are very fortunate she is too weak to stay here. We could've played for so long. Perhaps we will return for more fun when she becomes stronger" Gothmog said to Maitimo in a conversational tone before flipping his knife up to catch it in another grip and plunge into his shoulder all the way to its hilt. He screamed then and so did I.

I cowered back on the floor when he approached me, but he didn't say anything and just lifted me back up in his arms. He didn't even bother to let Maitimo down from where he was hung in that uncomfortable position before leaving. I caught the silvery grey eyes as we were leaving in mine and was horrified to see a single tear leaking down his eye. His eyes didn't look sad though, just resigned and angry.