Chapter 39: We Wish You a Merry Christmas

The journey to Russia was as long and short as a plane flight. Ian seemed tense about the family reunion happening in winter instead of summer this year. Alex figured it was just that his family decided to screw with Ian. "Why'd you pick, Russia?"

It was a genuine question. He had his theories, but it was always good to ask. Ian's gaze sharpened. "How'd you know it was me?"

Alex shrugged. "A little birdie told me."

Ian rolled his eyes. Alex thought he was being funny. "The vents in the family home did that, more like."

Alex snorted. Ian had seen right through that one. Alex had figured he would. "True."

Ian sighed. "So, we'll mostly be in Moscow and St. Petersburg."

Alex turned to him. "Mostly?"

Ian got them both cranberry juice. "About half our time is getting spent on a farm, too. Getting away from the city can be fun."

Alex raised an eyebrow. "And who owns the farm?"

It was always best to check. You never knew what kind of nutcases lived on farms to avoid people. Ian raised an eyebrow. "You'll see."

Alex sighed. He didn't exactly have great memories involving flying to Russia. Then, again. Ian was taking him to all the major tourist sights, so this could be fun. The two weeks with just the two of them were probably Ian's way of being nice to him because of the family reunion. "Why'd they schedule it so early?"

Alex wanted to hear Ian's opinion. Ian let out a huff. "To make extra sure I'm keeping my word. Plus, Marion wants to make sure the little training regime is working out."

His family really was a bunch of paranoid little shits. Then again, he couldn't really talk. Alex laid back as the plane landed. The customs line was very, very long. Apparently, the Russians had to interview everyone about exactly why they wanted to visit the country. Paranoid fuckers. Not that he blamed them. The Berlin Wall hadn't fallen that long ago and they were a nuclear power. Alex just sighed and resigned himself to boredom.

The hotel was actually nice. Alex was surprised to find the bathroom was equipped with an actual full bath with jets. Ian was unpacking their bags. Alex had left the textbooks Ian didn't know about at home. He'd finished them and he partially considered this vacation. There was the opportunity to practice his Russian, which was nice. He just had to make sure Sarov didn't hear about the two of them visiting and decide to drop in. Those two would be a very tense mix and that didn't even include the rest of his family. Sarov had a lot of contacts if he remembered correctly. Plus, the Russian was obsessed with him as it was. They did not need another meeting. Ian would explode if he found out that he'd been writing to the general. His relatives would start nosing around as well. He wouldn't put it past Patrick to have the man assassinated preemptively, either. Grandfather was a bit paranoid. Marion delighted in mayhem, destruction, and death. It would be fun to see Jason and Lilly again. Alex stretched out on the bed. He was growing at about the same rate as last time, but it still seemed slow. He supposed he was just used to being sixteen. He reflected grimly that he would nearly be eighteen if he had lived the first time around. Almost an adult and able to vote. He had another two years before he had to worry about Cornwall. It shouldn't be too hard to prevent either Yassen or his uncle from going. Or he could simply remove Sayle before then. It couldn't be that hard. Alex had run circles around the compound before and that was after Yassen had been there to improve security. Admittedly, he'd been caught, but not before achieving his objective. Alex wondered if he shouldn't already. It would take care of his initial problem at least. There was also Greif to consider. It would be less than a year before Gemini's initial stage was in action. Alex was sure the man deserved to die already, even if he had yet to murder more innocent people. He'd seen some of the experiments done in the apartheid and it was enough to make anyone vomit. That man was already a monster and so was Stellenbosch. They were on his list. Howell was dead. Rothman was dead. Razim, he was sure Joe would happily shoot given half the chance. Yu would require some delicacy, maybe Yassen would help, but probably not. Kurst was a menace and had ordered Jack's death in the past life. The rest of the board hadn't done anything and were generally reasonable. As in, they would probably vote against any kind of terrorist plot that would bring the wrath of the intelligence agencies on them. They were still terrible people, don't get him wrong, but they were not the most terrible people.

Ian was looking at him. Alex raised an eyebrow. "You sure you're alright?"

Alex sighed. "Yes, Ian."

Ian sat next to him on the bed. His uncle tended to ask the question a lot more nowadays. "What were you thinking about?"

Alex rolled over. "Revenge."

Ian gave him a look. "On who? For what?"

Alex smirked. Telling his uncle he was plotting the deaths of just under half of SCORPIA's executive board was not going to end well under any circumstances. "People and things."

Ian drew out his name, like a taffy. "Alex."

Alex sighed. "The people who killed my parents."

It wasn't even untrue. Ian sighed. "Alex."

Ian pulled him close and began running his hands through his hair. "Yes, Ian?"

His uncle held him tighter. "Please don't."

Alex tried to move but found himself trapped. "Why not?"

Ian was breathing against him. Alex was sure it was quicker than Ian's normal breathing. "Those people are more dangerous than you can imagine."

Alex stiffened. He could imagine quite a bit. "They killed my parents."

Ian was pulling him closer. A whisper went into his ear. "They have hundreds of assassins at their disposal."

Alex forced himself to relax. "They killed my parents."

Ian sighed in his ear. "Maybe when you're older, okay?"

Alex leaned in. "Fine."

He forgot he was eleven again sometimes. "Please, Alex, promise me you won't do anything stupid until you're an adult."

Alex heaved a sigh. "Ian."

His uncle turned pleading brown eyes on him. "Fine. I'll try not to."

Ian gave him a rare smile and loosened his hold slightly. Feather-light fingers ran through his hair and along his scalp. Ian was holding him for a long time. "What were they like?"

Alex didn't specify who. He didn't have to. Ian froze slightly. "After dinner, I'll tell you."

They had room service. Ian seemed to be in one of his rare indulgent moods. He was being clingy, but Alex didn't really mind. The meal was eaten in absolute silence, but it wasn't the awkward tense silence they'd had on other travels; it was a comfortable silence. Alex sat next to Ian on the chair near the fireplace. Ian had gotten it started and the orange-yellow flames flickered brightly over the logs. It was nice and warm. "You said you'd tell me about my parents."

Ian poured himself some scotch from the mini-bar. It was the first time he'd seen Ian openly drink. Alex was rather surprised. "You already know most of how they met and what I knew about your mother. I never really had the chance to get to know her, but she really did love, John. Her family may have disapproved, but they let her marry him. Before they were married, her first marriage had failed, you know. She liked chocolate and strawberries. A really nice woman."

Ian paused and started drinking. "Your dad, well, we grew up together. John was always the star, you know. Top of his class. Popular. Football player. He and I used to pull practical jokes together. We once swapped our teacher's perfume with vinegar."

Ian's eyes were warmed by the memory. The corners of his mouth upturned faintly. He took another sip of scotch. "We joined the army. He was the star of the SAS, you know. We were patriots. I barely passed and my first mission was a disaster. Then it all went to hell."

Alex knew the rest of the story. His grandparents had died and his dad went to prison undercover. "John was everything I wanted in a brother. They didn't tell me at first, you know, what he was actually doing in Italy. I tracked him down and decked him before he explained."

Alex started. Ian looked like he was in pain. His uncle was on his second drink. "You two are so much alike it hurts to look at you sometimes and other times you two are so different..."

Ian finished his second drink and capped the bottle. "Alex… I love you and…I can't lose you."

Ian looked close to tears. "I'm not going anywhere."

Ian pulled him in for another hug. "Don't make promises you can't keep."

Alex pulled away and stood up. "I don't. I love you, too, you know."

Ian let out something between a gasp and a sigh. "Alex…"

Alex sat back down and leaned against Ian. Ian put his arm around Alex and he rested his head on Ian's shoulder. The two were once again sitting in silence as they watched the fire burn and eventually die.

Ian Rider woke up at the crack of dawn, still sitting by the fireplace with his nephew leaning on him. It was the best night's sleep he'd had in forever, including with Crawley. He'd gone and slept for fourteen hours with Alex. Even if he was stiff. He'd drank in front of Alex. He'd just forgotten his nephew was still eleven until now. Oops. Oh, well. At least he hadn't gotten obscenely drunk. Alex was still dead to the world. Ian pulled the comforter off of Alex's bed. He grabbed a pillow. He put it under Alex's head and then put the comforter on top of him. Alex really did look his age when he was asleep. He was so cute and small and he looked so peaceful and innocent. Ian smiled softly in the morning light. It was nice to be here with just the two of them. He decided to wait to wake Alex up. His nephew probably needed the sleep and they were on vacation. Ian stepped into the bathroom and started the shower up. He was out and dressed in less than fifteen minutes. Ian silently opened the door and shut it behind him. Time to return the favor from Kazakhstan. There was certain to be breakfast right now, especially in an area with a lot of tourists. He figured he could give Alex an actual vacation before they had to meet up with the nutjobs Alex had the misfortune to be related to. Russia was a large place with a good deal of things to see. Ian had seen a few of them, but not in any kind of official or leisure capacity. Going on a Kremlin tour and breaking into the place were two very different activities. Ian knew the relatives were probably going to try to spy on them, as well. They never could resist the urge to try to meddle with his upbringing Alex. Ian looked forward to them trying. Alex would definitely win in the competition against them. They also had a game in mind for the official family reunion in the countryside outside of St. Petersburg. It would be interesting, to say the least. Ian wasn't sure who would win, but it would be interesting.

Alex woke up to Ian coming in. "How long was I out?"

Ian shrugged. "Seventeen hours."

Alex shot up in bed. "Shit. I'm behind on-"

Ian interjected. "Absolutely nothing. Vacation, remember?"

Ian placed his breakfast on the table. "Here, eat. I got you breakfast."

Alex got up, feeling rather sticky. "Thanks."

He instinctively sniffed himself and was surprised to discover he actually was starting to smell. Oh, joy. Ian looked at him quizzically. "I think I might need deodorant soon."

Ian twitched. "Alright, then. You can have my spares for deodorant and cologne."

Alex resisted a smirk. Trust Ian to have spares. On the other hand, he would smell like Ian. His uncle dropped them both at the foot of his bed. "Thanks."

Ian shrugged it off. "You can get your own if you want."

Alex actually didn't care. "Whatever you have is fine."

Ian looked pleased. "After you shower, we can go see the Red Square and go on the Kremlin tour."

Alex got ready as fast as he could manage. This was going to be nice. He hadn't actually gotten to see the sights the last time he'd visited. They walked out of the hotel and into the street. Ian had gotten them a place on the main shopping street in Moscow, which was close to all of the tourist sights. His uncle held his hand as they walked in the streets. It was a bit of an adjustment, especially because he knew the language. He caught snippets of the conversations as they strolled towards the Red Square. The Cyrillic letters and the rhythm of the conversations were familiar, but definitely had a sense of foreign to it. They walked to the Kremlin. It was impossible to miss with the signs pointing the way. As they got closer, there were all kinds of tours being offered. The roads were full of cars that seemed to be patently disregarding road safety. Alex wasn't sure about Russian road laws, but some people hadn't bothered with seatbelts. It was cold and he'd already donned winter gear, although the main areas seemed to have been cleared of snow. The wind bit at their skin and faces, but the crowd seemed to give off a minimal sort of warmth. Alex could see each breath in the air. It wasn't snowing today, which probably helped a bit. They lined up at the entrance for guided Kremlin tours. Ian had already made a reservation for the two of them, so they wouldn't have to wait in line outside. Alex stared at the stone building and the columns topped in fire at the entrance. Even covered in snow, the place was amazing. The walkways were clear, but the building was covered in glittering white snow. Alex couldn't help staring as the guide took them to all the major points. It was bigger than he'd expected. Then again, most of the 'bank' was underground, so it wasn't fair to compare the two.

The tour lasted nearly half the day and Alex was ready for lunch by the time they got back to where they could eat again. His personal favorite was the armory. The weapons were just awesome to look at. His favorites were the ceremonial swords. The intricate detail in the hilts, plus the fact that most of them still had an actual blade that could function was definitely interesting. Ian looked at him. "Do you want to eat here or walk for a bit for a sit-down restaurant?"

Alex considered it. "Walk for a bit."

He did want to sit without getting snow all over him. Ian took him to a restaurant on the same street as their hotel. The two of them sat down to a lunch of borscht and pelmeni. It was really good if a bit different from his usual taste pallet. Alex sat back in the chair a bit. "That was nice."

Ian grinned. "I'm glad you liked it."

Alex rolled his eyes. "Seen the Kremlin already, have you?"

Ian's lips twitched. "Oh, yes. Unofficially, of course."

Alex rolled his eyes. Sometimes Ian was just so Cold War. It was a nice change from his normally stiff uncle, so Alex went with it. Ian seemed to be enjoying whatever memory had him so amused. Alex finished off his lunch. He felt pleasantly full. "What next?"

They both got up from the table. Ian smiled. "Why don't we just walk down the street for a bit?"

Alex shrugged. Ian just pointed out various different things that were not done in Britain. Ian never could resist a cultural lesson. Alex enjoyed the walk anyway, even as he took in the details of what Ian was saying. It was nice to just walk around and listen to Ian sometimes.

The next couple of days, the two of them mostly spent seeing the sights in Moscow. It was a nice change of pace from their usual vacations, which were full of wilderness survival. Alex was mentally old enough to be able to appreciate some of the sights more. Ian knew so much about the art and history of Russia that he could be a tour guide. Alex wondered whether the interest was personal or professional and then felt slightly guilty for wondering. The two of them wandered the city. Alex was fascinated by the newly remodeled subway. It was really spectacular to see. Ian seemed to be enjoying the more sedate pace as well. Alex was sure the missions and arguments with Jack were tiring in more ways than one. Ian was, of course, keeping him away from the seedier parts of town. Alex didn't blame him. With the way trouble seemed to find them, it was probably best to avoid looking for it. The cold was a constant companion the minute they stepped outside. Alex surprised to find out just how penetrative the icy wind was. The snow made moving exhausting when you had to walk through it as well. The two of them continued to see things in the city. The place was massive. They only really went to spots in the inner city, of course. The two of them strolled along the street. "Your cousins are coming today."

Alex was confused. "I thought we weren't meeting them until St. Petersburg."

Ian's lips twitched. "We aren't, but you didn't think they'd resist the chance to try to watch us did you?"

Alex grinned. "Ian, we aren't going to play ditch the relatives, are we?"

Ian laughed as a memory of him and John pranking their sister-in-law came to mind. "Yes, Alex, yes we are."

Ian grabbed his arm and they walked down the road. The shop windows tended to fog with the contrast between the outside and inside temperatures, so it was a challenge to check your surroundings at times. Alex spotted a tell-tale flash of red hair that he was familiar with. It was so on. Lily was going down. Especially after that punch he still needed to pay her back for. Ian raised an eyebrow. "We aren't just going to let them follow us, now are we Alex?"

Alex rolled his eyes. "Encouraging the cousin rivalry, Ian, tsk, tsk. You're supposed to be the responsible adult here."

Alex was already forming a snowball. Ian's lips twitched. "All in good fun, Alex, all in good fun."

Alex finished his snowball. "The redhead is Lily, right?"

Ian's smile was slightly feral. "Yep."

Alex did a turn that had him 180 degrees around and threw the snowball perfectly into Lily's face 30 feet in front of him. Ian started laughing about halfway through their run home. It was about a block, but they were trying to avoid his (now angry) cousins. Alex was sure their grins were slightly manic, but he was enjoying himself. Ian was still smirking at dinner time a few hours later. "Want some hot chocolate?"

Ian rarely lets him order the stuff. "Sure."

Alex was walking down the street with Ian when a thought occurred to him. They had already gotten presents for everyone at home, but not his relatives. "We should probably get Christmas presents, right? I mean we are kind of vacationing on a shopping street, so we don't really have an excuse not to."

Ian looked surprised. "We can if you want to."

Alex mentally rolled his eyes. "I know you don't like them, Ian, but really? It's Christmas."

Ian snorted. "One holiday with that lot behaving is not going to fix my issues with them."

Alex sighed and patted Ian's arm. "It'll be fine, Ian, just humor the poor insane relatives."

Ian snorted. "That's what I'm afraid of. Now, what are you going to get them?"

Alex raised an eyebrow. "Why, planning on putting tracking devices on it?"

Ian whacked him lightly upside the head. "No, brat, I'm just curious."

Alex's grin was rather shit-eating. "Curiosity killed the cat."

Ian ruffled his hair. "Hypocrite."

Alex retorted. "Bring it, old man."

Ian made a mock angry face. "Old, am I? We'll see who wins the competition the relatives and I have planned."

Alex rolled his eyes. "Don't you think it's unfair that you adults know about it before we do?"

Ian's eyes danced mischievously. Alex didn't trust that look. "No. I'm sure you'll rise to the challenge."

Alex gave him a look. "Totally win despite your cheating, you mean."

Ian snorted. "You'll never get it out of me."

Alex gave him an innocent look. "Not even in exchange for knowing what everybody is getting for Christmas?"

Ian rolled his eyes. "I can just check the bill."

Alex grinned. "I used cash and burned the receipts back at home and plan to again."

Ian shrugged. "I'll steal the receipts before you do."

Challenge accepted. "You can try."

After shopping for his relatives and three unsuccessful pickpocketing attempts from Ian later, Alex was tired. He'd ended up getting himself and his cousins' necklaces with a single charm. Jason had a bull. Lily got the flower she was named after. He got himself one with a black phoenix on it, figuring the symbolism was fitting. The chains were gold. Ian got an exploding panther paperweight he'd made himself. Marion got a book on ways the Russian royal court had died. Darian got one on strategy and Patrick got a book on riddles in Russian. Alex returned to the present. He'd ended up in a contest with Ian. His uncle had to wait outside the store and was only allowed to check the receipts, not the bags themselves. Ian was surprisingly easy to foil. Then again, he'd had more practice at pickpocketing than his uncle. Plus, he had thought of a way to foil the man's attempts. After attempt number four, Ian was currently pouting. The man would totally deny it. Alex grinned. "And I win since this is our room. Cheers."

Ian rolled his eyes. "At least I didn't bet anything on this."

Alex grinned. "Is that a gambling problem I hear you having, Ian?"

A pillow hit him in the face. "Shut it, you."

Alex grabbed the pillow and threw it right back. "Don't be a sore loser, Ian."

Alex pulled out the receipts. "Speaking of which."

He pulled out his heavy duty lighter and set them on fire. They burned before they hit the ground. Ian huffed. "That is totally gloating."

Alex snorted. "And you're acting totally fifteen."

Ian shrugged. "You would know, with that company you keep."

Alex rolled his eyes. "They aren't that bad, Ian."

Ian ran a hand through his hair. "No, they definitely don't keep you up late, let you sleep in, mess with your diet, and encourage your unpatriotic sentiments."

Alex rolled his eyes. "Sure, Tulip, if you put it like that."

Ian threw another pillow at him. "I let you hang out with that lot, don't I?"

Alex shrugged. "Reluctantly. Besides, I have fun and it's my night off."

Ian sighed. "They're not my favorite friends, but I'll put up with them for your sake. At least they don't come over."

Alex resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Ian didn't exactly know about the secret vigilante part of his friend group. Yassen didn't either. Alex was content to keep them and his bunker as his own secrets. Not to mention Antonio. They hadn't committed any more murders, but they had submitted evidence to the police (mostly anonymously or through the people they helped). Alex could also build more of his own stuff. He almost wanted to get called into the bank to have a talk with Smithers, just to compare ideas and show off a bit. Ian continued to huff and puff about his friends as they went to dinner. Alex just ignored him. He'd heard it all before.

Brendan Chase had just gotten yet another turn down from Pierre. He found them highly amusing, which was one of the reasons Pierre was still breathing. The others included the fact that the paranoid piece of shit was impossible to find. Nile was clearly nervous about his inability to do more, but Chase figured this was a good chance to teach the man patience. He was convinced the man was mildly insane from years of operations, but otherwise able to do good operational work. He held a grudging respect for the man who seemed to have enough of a spine to tell him, no, but still dance so tantalizingly close to his grip. Chase wondered why he only worked for intelligence agencies. If he bombed a base, he clearly held them in contempt. Or did he need Graves and Stein enough to risk their wrath by bombing them under their nose? Chase had to admire the sheer audacity of the man if that was the case. Was he really that worried about being on a watch list? They weren't that bad. Then again, Pierre didn't have organizational backing. Exclusive client list, too. None of the lower levels seemed to know anything about the guy. Or he just used a different name when dealing with them. Three was more patient than he was. Nile seemed to think the man was amused with his antics involving Pierre, which was why the man was being hands-off. Chase preferred the doctor to his other colleagues. The man may be an interfering twit, but Three could at least back off on queue. Kurst would have sent a kill team already. Yu had the charm of a dead cobra. The others were just as bad. At least Grendel and Kroll had put their foot down at Kurst's poorly disguised grab for power. Trying to induct more board members without their input. Not on his watch. The others had apparently agreed. Plus, the man's candidates had been less than ideal. They had enough members, anyhow. Nile was standing in front of him. "You can go now, Nile. Your new assignment is in Russia. Gregorovich can't go there for a few more years due to the number of clients he served in the past."

Nile left him alone with his thoughts. He just needed one more sample of Pierre's work or maybe two. Then, he'd have a good idea of what the man could do.

Alex Rider was walking through the street having just successfully pelted his aunt with snow when he spotted Nile. Ian was out getting his set of Christmas presents and Alex had decided to go on a walk. Alex felt a flash of inspiration and began forming a snowball. Ian was going to murder him when he found out. He tried not to grin too manically and threw a snowball at an assassin. He ended up hitting Nile in the dead center of his chest. "What the-"

Alex grinned. "Language. There are kids present."

Nile glared at him. "You don't count."

Alex flashed him a mock-innocent look. "I don't know what you're talking about. Sorry, that snowball was meant for my cousin."

Nile snorted. "Bullshit you don't. What are you doing here?"

Alex raised an eyebrow. "Ever heard of Christmas vacation?"

Nile rolled his eyes. "Yeah, you seem to get it. And spring vacation. And summer vacation. And fall vacation. And random weeks in the year vacation."

Alex rolled his eyes. "I'm homeschooled, silly."

Nile raised an eyebrow, trying to channel Yassen. "And where pray tell, is the guardian who is supposedly educating you?"

Alex felt defensive on Ian's behalf. "It's Christmas Eve, so he's getting presents. Two, I'm educated. We can discuss the economic effects of the drug trade in Nicaragua if you really want to."

Nile sighed. He hadn't exactly learned in a conventional school. "Point taken."

The kid was being stubborn again. "What are you doing here? Stalking me again?"

Nile rolled his eyes. He was almost as paranoid as Yassen. "Working. I have to travel a lot, you know."

Alex began to walk away. "You know I could just kill you where you stand."

Alex turned around rolling his eyes. "You could, but then you'd be bored."

The damn kid was right. Nile let the kid walk off. Snowballs were harmless, anyhow. The accuracy and distance were kind of impressive. Nile glanced around to check that nobody was looking before making a snowball and hitting the kid in the back of the head. "Payback."

He said to the kid's shocked face and disappearing into a nearby alley, chuckling. Yassen would probably murder him for talking to the kid without permission, but drug gang negotiations were boring, he was on lunch break, and that was fun.

Marion Beckett was no slouch. She'd bugged her (admittedly darling) nephew as soon as she'd gotten to Russia. The conversation between him and the man in black had been interesting, to say the least. What would Alex want with a wanted terrorist? Sure, he told the man to get lost, but he didn't really mean it. There were no threats with weapons and he'd sought the man out by throwing a snowball at him. Phish. Boy wonder was in de-ni-al. Not that it was her business. She wondered how long he'd been slipping Ian's leash to visit his friends from the wrong side of the tracks. The very, very wrong side of the tracks. She resisted a giggle at the thought of him going behind Ian's back. He really was precious. Marion relished the idea of sending him to the terrorists after his training was finished. It would serve Ian and his morals right if Alex turned out to be one of the best contract killer and double agent combinations ever. Her poor nephew stuck with Ian Rider as a guardian. Marion would have gone insane at the boredom. The man was absolutely no fun. She was still outraged that it had taken them ten years to be able to see her nephew again. If she'd had her way, Helen would have lived with them after John had started double agent-ing. Alex was a reminder of what her sister should have been. Helen had been rather soft. Kind, sure, but definitely not a person you sent into the family business. The poor woman had not had a good first marriage, either. Then, she'd had to go and marry John-freaking-Rider. Helen's taste in men aside, she had always been such a nice sister. Alex reminded her of Helen sometimes. The way he bit his lip was the same. The nose was, too. His cheekbones were close to her shape as well. Marion remembered the thrill of her knife fight with him. She should have had that with Helen, too. Helen hadn't made it past the first couple of stages of training, so she hadn't been in on any of the family secrets. It was one of the reasons her blood had boiled at the thought of Alex not knowing. She had always wanted to share with Helen, but her father insisted she keep quiet about it. Marion went back to eavesdropping on Alex and Ian.

On Christmas Day, Alex woke up to his relatives barging into his and Ian's hotel room at six o'clock in the morning. Marion poked him a couple times after he put a pillow over his face and resisted the urge to scream into it. Who woke up at six o'clock in the bleeding morning on vacation? Marion yanked the pillow away from him as Ian and Patrick started openly arguing about appropriate times to barge into hotels rooms early in the morning. Alex blinked. "Marion, one of these days you are going to wake me up and I will stab you. Painfully."

His aunt giggled. "I look forward to it."

Knowing his aunt, she might actually be telling the truth about that. Lilly, Jason, and Darian had stealthed their way into the living room and sat on the couch. "I thought we weren't meeting until St. Petersburg."

Marion huffed. "We decided to come early and track you down."

Alex rolled his eyes. "And you got sick of being pelted with snow."

Marion shoved his head into the nearest pillow. "Brat, you are so paying for that later."

Alex would have responded, but he currently was being smothered in a pillow. There was no real venom behind her words. Alex shoved her off him and off of the bed just to be safe. It might have something to do with his reflexive reaction to being strangled, too. Marion actually fell, to his surprise. "Sorry."

Marion shrugged. "No harm was done. Did Ian started your night exercises up again?"

Ian heard and paused in his bickering with Patrick. "No, Ian did not."

Marion's lips twitched. "You know, referring to yourself in the third person is a sign of impending madness."

Ian's eyes flared. "You know, slicing up your nephew is considered child abuse, right?"

Alex decided to interrupt before those two got into it. "People, decorum."

To his surprise, everybody in the room straightened up and shut up. Well, that was easy. "Alright, now all of you act like you were socialized normally as children, please."

Alex forgot he looked and was supposed to act eleven at that moment. To his surprise, everybody listened to him and quit arguing. "I'm getting dressed. No killing each other. Bye."

Alex stepped into the shower with the clothes he'd laid out the night before.

Marion looked smugly at Ian. "I told you so."

Darian snorted. "He's not going to say yes because of one thing."

Patrick interjected. "Most other children would have chosen a side."

Ian griped. "Alex has never been most children."

Marion looked at him. "Yes, but I think you like to ignore just how special he is."

Ian was about ready to start arguing again. "You know next to nothing about him."

Marion looked savage. "And whose fault is that?"

Ian grit his teeth. "If you were fit guardians, I wouldn't have kept you away from him."

Marion's eyes flashed. "Right, and remind me again who got accused by child services five times in a row."

Ian glared. "Fuck you. Those were misunderstandings."

Marion drew herself up against him. "Yeah, the housekeepers misunderstood the fact that you left him alone for months on end, I'm sure. Last I checked, neglect is still abuse."

The woman tossed her hair. Patrick looked old and tired. Lilly and Jason were glancing between the two adults. Darian was staunchly ignoring them all. Ian retorted. "Yeah, and I'm pretty sure training children as assassins definitely qualifies as physical and psychological abuse, Marion. Don't get me started."

Patrick decided to intervene. "Children, enough is enough."

They both quieted. Marion looked at her brother. "Oh, no. I'm not getting involved in the accuse-fest."

Patrick sighed. "There are days I think none of us should have had children. I am going out to get groceries. As Alex would say, don't kill each other."

Nile had also bugged Blondie's family. Hey, the Mossad bitch had the right idea. Blondie got in way too much trouble. First Yassen and now him. Plus, the kid's family were all batshit abusive assholes as far as Nile could tell. The uncle may or may not be included in that. No wonder the kid liked to wander around and avoid the house as much as possible. If that was what he came home to, Nile would have run away years ago. Of course, they didn't seem bad enough that the government would intervene. He was willing to bet that they had enough connections to scare away child services, as well. The cousins seemed okay, but you never could tell. Gramps was a piece of work. Nile was ninety percent sure he could a better job of raising Blondie than they could and he was a contract killer who worked for a terrorist organization. At least his family had been nice and loving before they were brutally murdered in front of him. Nile sighed at the memory. At any rate, he was spying on Blondie. It was kind of fun. I mean his relatives were shitty, but Blondie was never boring at least. Are you sure you're not a pervert? The kid's voice rang in his head. A silent accusation. Well, he wasn't exactly spying on the kid's shower. You might be one of those creeps who tries to be the kid's friend at first. Shut up. Great, now he was hearing Blondie in his head. They'd throw him in a looney bin if they found out. No, he was just lonely. Very lonely. There was absolutely nothing wrong with him. Yeah, and I'm a pink panther. Well, the kid was being trained for espionage. It's okay, Nile. Everybody in black ops is a little nuts. He ignored that comment. Looks like Christmas was getting rolling at the kid's hotel room. Why wasn't it at their house? Nile sighed. He had to finalize the deal with the drug dealers. It was looking to be highly profitable for SCORPIA. What kind of person works during Christmas? Nile resisted the urge to groan. He was just going to ignore his new mental version of pint-sized. And maybe ask his shrink a few questions about 'an acquaintance'. Sure, like they won't see through that in a heartbeat. Nile resisted the urge to talk to Blondie in his head. You weren't crazy until you started talking back to the voices in your head, right? Was it his long-dead conscience making an appearance? Meh, he'd just ask for an assassination assignment. That usually fixed his mood right up. Not like they had a shortage of contracts.

Alex Rider got out of the shower to the kind of awkward silence that made you just want to disappear straight back into the bathroom. "Where is Grandfather?"

Darian answered him. Ian and Marion seemed to be attempting to spontaneously combust each other through glaring. "He went for groceries. Something about not room servicing Christmas dinner."

Alex sighed and sat next to his cousins. "You two alright?"

They both just nodded in silence. "Well, this is awkward."

Lily and Jason were examining him like he was a new kind of insect under a microscope. "What were those two arguing about now?"

Lilly shot a look at Jason. "Um, your upbringing."

Alex rolled his eyes. "Figures. Do you guys want to watch the idiot box?"

Lilly fidgeted. "We don't know Russian."

Alex shrugged. "I'll translate for you."

He switched the news on. He caught several of the adults giving him amused looks when he gave all the announcers exaggerated accents and added in his own snarky commentary when they paused for breath. Lilly and Jason were both sniggering through it by a few minutes in, especially after he started ragging on the all the governments equally. Ian's lips were twisted as he tried not to laugh. His eyes gave him away. Darian and Marion were shaking with suppressed laughter. Alex just finished another comment, when the door opened with a bang. "What are you retards laughing about now?"

Alex got up. "Merry Christmas to you too, Grumps."

The old man raised an eyebrow. "What did you just call me?"

Alex grinned. "Damn. I thought we had a few more years before the deafness set in."

The old man glared at him. Alex widened his eyes. "What? You're ruining my Christmas cheer."

Patrick snorted. "Boy, not even death threats seem to ruin your cheer any time of the year."

Alex shrugged. "True. Do you want help with that?"

The man looked at him. "Long as you don't blow up the stove."

Alex rolled his eyes after Patrick turned around. "Honestly, the only time I did that was when I was about to be kidnapped."

His grandfather tossed the knife into his chopping board. "Less yacking, more chopping. We want this done before midnight."

Alex wondered if he was related the Sarge as he got started on the first onion.

Jack Starbright had hosted Christmas for herself, Tom, Jerry, and John Crawley. The presents had been opened and the dinner had been eaten. Her, the dog, and Tom were now sitting outside and staring at the sky. Fenrir whined. "I know, I miss him too."

Tom looked over at her. "Do you think he's alright with his relatives?"

Jack smiled. "Alex is probably just fine."

Tom snorted. "He said his aunt and Ian argue worse than mum and dad."

Jack sighed. There was that. She was also not oblivious to the fact that the first aid kit had needed restocking the first couple of weeks Alex got back from the last family reunion. Ian had seemed perfectly fine, as well. "I'll restock the first aid kit in advance."

Tom glanced at her. "What do you mean?"

Jack sighed. "He was using it the first couple of weeks he got back."

Tom looked alarmed. "For what?"

Jack shrugged. "Whatever it was required a lot of bandages, sterilization, and antibiotic cream."

Tom huffed. "That's bad, Jack. Really bad."

Jack sighed. "It could have been an accident."

Tom looked at her. "Do you really believe that?"

Jack petted Fenrir. "I want to, I think."

Tom sighed. "What do we do?"

Jack shrugged. "Sometimes the only thing you can do. Watch and wait."

Fenrir whined. "It's okay. Alex will be fine."

The dog huffed. Tom snorted bitterly. "Even the dog doesn't believe it, Jack."

Jack carded her other hand through his hair. "Alex is strong."

Tom gave her a look. "But what happens when he isn't strong enough for whatever his crazy relatives do to him?"

Jack glanced at him and the dog. "I guess we pick up the pieces, then."

Tom gave her a look. "The others before me, Tom, they tried. You can ask Alex. I did. It didn't end well for anybody."

Tom sighed. "I can't accept the unacceptable."

Jack ran her hands through her hair. "Look, Tom, Alex needs us."

Tom gave her a look. "I know. Goodnight, Jack."

The dog followed him in. Jack sighed and went in herself. At least Alex had remembered them enough to get gifts. A wonder, considering the amounts of time he and Ian disappeared for. And yet, Alex remembered to call and write and sent gifts and postcards. The way Ian never had. Jack wondered whether it was because of or in spite of that. She sighed and ran her fingers down the angel charm Alex had given her. It was the best present he'd ever given her. A physical reminder that he remembered her. It brought a soft smile to her face. She didn't take it off to shower or sleep.