"I am so done." Carly mutters under her breath.
Against her better judgement, and with really nothing to lose, she decided to trust Sonny. And of course, it blew up in her face.
Needing some time to think, she decided to head to the bridge. Weather being in Jason's favorite spot will calm her down or turn her into a cry baby, either way, the longing for her... bestfriend... drives her there. The driver dropped her at the edge of the docks so she can take her usual shortcut through the docks towards the bridge. Tony is on her heels as unobtrusively as possible. She appreciates how well he leaves her to her life. Silently she hopes that the bridge in unoccupied. Drew has been a real friend the past few weeks, but she doesn't feel like being around anyone else tonight.
As she rounds the corner, she is met with a sight that tells her she definitely took a very wrong turn today.
Victor Casadine, a man she had seen outside Peter's hospital room a few weeks ago, several times and a scrawny, quiet guy that screams low-life minion, all turn to her.
Victor is the first to take a step toward her, hand rummaging in his pocket.
"How much have you heard?" he asks, menacingly.
"Nothing. I swear." Carly answers stepping back, involuntarily.
"That's far enough." Tony announces behind her, his gun pointed at Victor.
Victor looks annoyed while he answers.
"I'm afraid I cannot take the chance to believe your claim."
Carly hears a scuffle behind her and then Tony is next to her on the ground.
"People will notice if I'm missing." Carly threatens.
Victor shrugs indifferently, then one of his men takes her handbag and take out her phone.
"It's time for you to disappear." He takes out a device from his jacket pocket, then continues conversationally... "I wish I could tell you where you will disappear to or even if you would still exist, but I'm afraid I stole this off a man too dead to give me the details. Suffice it to say, you won't be here."
A split second before a bright flash engulfs her vision, Carly can't help but wonder if this device could take her to Jason.
And then everything goes dark.
"Carly?! Carly?!"
She can feel a warm hand on her cheek and the most beautiful voice saying her name. She tries to fight her way to the surface, her head feeling like it has been stuffed with cotton wool.
"Jason?"
Is she dead?
She finally manages to wrench her eyes open to look at his concerned face.
"Are you okay?" Jason asks.
Not trusting her voice, she just nods and pulls him towards her so she can hug him while allowing the tears to fall over his shoulder. The position is awkward as she is lying on the floor, in her own kitchen. Confused she pulls back so Jason can help her up. Only Jason will let her hug him in a back breaking position like that.
As soon as she's up, and seated at the island, Jason's hand still on her back as he watches her with concern edged on his features, she notices... The moss bowl.
She is fairly certain this is not heaven. Or hell. Or a suspended dimension. Or even 2022.
"Jason?"
"You need to start eating. Real food." he answers.
"What year is this?"
Jason is taken aback by the question.
"Have you lost some memories?" he counters, concerned, inspecting her head.
She shakes her head.
"I think... I think I traveled through time."
Jason gives her an incredulous look, his eyebrow raised.
"I know how it sounds, but it's the only explanation."
After a pause, frowning, Jason answers.
"2021." he waits, almost as if he wants to see her reaction to the year.
"When in 2021?" Carly prods further.
"February."
Carly blows out the breath she had been holding, nodding, assessing the situation. The tears start falling and she pulls him in for another hug.
This Jason have no idea that they fell in love again, even got married, even if it was only for a few hours. And she cannot bring herself to tell him. She will have to bury all of them, again, all over again, and he won't even share those memories with her. It breaks her heart, but at the same time she is so grateful to be able to see him, hear him, touch him...
Also, Sonny's alive. She now knows that. And once Jason knows, anything... everything... they shared this year, would be... gone.
She steels herself before pulling back.
"You died on me. Again." she tells him, her words hanging almost like an accusation in the air.
With no way to answer, and still processing, Jason answers.
"I'm sorry." like he could have helped it. Although, Carly supposes, in Jason's mind, he truly does believe he can control whether he dies or not.
"I'm from 2022." she answers him then. "Victor Casadine has this... device. I was at the wrong place at the wrong time. He thought I overheard his conversation. I didn't. It's kind of ridiculous and stupid and yet, here I am..." she tears up again, grabs his hand, "and here you are."
He smiles at her, the reality of what she had lived through losing him, has caught up to him and his blue eyes are looking decidedly moist.
She sniffs, then tries to pull herself together.
"So, catch me up, where are we?"
"Um..." Jason starts, somewhat unsure of how one answers that question.
"Well, we just discussed given Martin a phone to contact Florence. And um... doing... Sonny's... Funeral."
Carly nods, feeling more oriented as to when she finds herself.
"Okay, so the phone thing with Martin, worked like a charm. And we're not doing Sonny's funeral this time around." she waves her hand, almost dismissively. "He's in Nixon falls, bartending, calls himself Mike... wearing cowboy hats." she rolls her eyes.
The initial joy of hearing his friend is alive is quickly replaced with confusion. Carly doesn't exactly seem elated. Granted, she may have had a lot of time to get used to the idea though.
"So, we can go fetch him." He suggests.
Carly looks at him, looking somewhat shell shocked. This is not the reaction he expected.
"Yeah sure, tomorrow.. maybe. Jase... I just need a little time to wrap my head around... time travel, and not... not mourning you... and losing all the good things of this year... and..." she trails off, just to throw her arms around him again. "God! I missed you... so much!"
Jason wraps her in his arms, allows his chin to rest on her shoulder. When she pulls back, he makes a suggestion.
"So, how about pizza and wine tonight, and then you can fill me in on the rest of the year?"
Carly smiles back at him. The peace and joy that shines from them as she just looks at him, hitting him almost like a physical blow. If he didn't believe in time travel before, he does now. The woman sitting across from him is definitely different from the woman he was having a conversation with about Martin and Florence a mere half an hour ago.
Later on, that evening, Carly finds herself at the dining room table, opposite Jason digging into some pizza. It feels surreal to be sitting across from him having dinner when just a few hours ago, he was gone and she had dwindling hopes of ever seeing him again. She can't help but drink in everything about him. His face, his hair, his eyes, the bulge in his cheek as he chews, the dependability rolling off him, his mere presence in touching distance from her.
"So, tell me about the year ahead." Jason asks, feeling a bit ridiculous. When he gets no answer he looks up to catch Carly staring at him, her eyes just roaming over him, her mind somewhere else.
"Carly?" he asks, gently.
She starts, looks into his eyes.
"I missed you." she answers, for a second her eyes fill with pain, then it disappears as she reminds herself that he is there, listening to her and asking a question.
"What was the question again?"
"I was asking what happened."
Carly shrugs, takes another bite of pizza and answers between chewing.
"I don't know where to start..." she swallows, then looks more decisive.
"You need to kill Peter. As soon as possible."
Jason pulls a face.
"Anna..."
"... will thank you." Carly finishes his sentence for him. "Elizabeth, too."
Jason looks confused.
Carly sighs.
"Peter kills Franco because he is tapping into his Drew memories. Cyrus finds out, frames you for it. You get arrested. I arrange for Shawn to stab you in Pentonville and you get sent to GH. Brick helps me organize your escape... and for the record, even Brick said if you followed the plan, it would have been fine, but you go back to save Britt from Cyrus' men and gets shot..."
Jason frowns, "That's how I die?!" he sounds almost offended that a mere bullet killed him. Only Jason can say that without sounding conceited.
Carly shakes her head.
"No, Britt saved you. I gave you blood, she removed the bullet, but... you couldn't get to the meeting. With the five families. So... I went instead."
Carly can see the alarm rising in Jason's eyes.
"It was fine. I was fine. Got the seat at the table, pissed off Cyrus of course... you went on the run... I... I... got Gladys to roll on Cyrus."
"Gladys? Corbin?"
"Yeah. Cyrus had her give a witness statement that she saw you dump the gun. I got her to recant and implicate Peter. Peter disappeared. Cyrus grabbed Gladys, I got her out, but he grabbed Spinelli, so I agreed to meet with him. You showed up, wounded him, he ran off, took Portia and Trina hostage and then finally got arrested after Laura and Curtis got involved and... it was messy."
"So, things turned out well?"
Carly pulls a face.
"Once you were back, I thought I could just hand the organization back to you, but it turned out to be more complicated than that."
Jason shakes his head, sits back.
"They wanted me to kill you, didn't they?"
Carly shrugs.
"We decided to... give a powerful show of unity. Prove that there is no division."
"How?" Jason asks.
"Well, um..." Carly hedge, then finds something she can say... "it ended with Buchema and Novak both dead." she shrugs. "Mrs. Wu... wasn't a problem." she answers.
"Anyway, turns out Peter had been holding Drew hostage. You went to Crete, saved him but… he came home. You.. didn't." she ends, the abruptness of her words relaying her pain in retelling all of it.
It's very early the next morning when the doorbell rings loudly through Casa Corinthos.
Jason, not much of a sleeper, heads to the front door. He is surprised to find Monica on the doorstep.
She looks shocked when she sees him.
"Jason!" she exclaims, then hesitantly, her eyes shining with tears, "This is going to sound strange, but… can I hug you?"
"Um, yeah." Jason answers, confused.
They hug and he holds her gently, wondering if this has anything with Carly's reaction to him when she woke up.
Monica pulls back.
"I came here to see you, because, well I need your help but I wasn't prepared…" she trails off.
"Um, come on in." Jason invites, surprised when she enters without any word about needing to speak privately or where Carly might be.
When they're standing in the lounge, she turns to him and hesitantly starts, looking confused and scared and unsure of what to say.
"I, um, do you…" she pauses, then chuckles nervously, "do you believe in time travel?"
"Wait, you too?" Carly exclaims from the stairs.
Monica swings around.
"Carly?!"
"It was Victor, wasn't it?" Carly answers, already making up her mind about the situation, heading towards Monica.
Jason is frozen to the spot, shocked when the two woman embrace as Monica starts babbling.
"I overheard a conversation at the hospital and he pulled out this device…" as she pulls back she continues, "I don't understand, no one knows your missing. Michael got a text that said your heading to Greece to go find…" she trails off, remembering Jason staring at them.
"Victor took my phone." Carly answers as an explanation. "On the plus side, I found him." Carly jokes, enthusiastically, as she points at Jason.
Monica smiles up at her son.
"Yes, yes, we both did." She answers, taking Jason's hand and squeezing it.
"At least with Carly here, I won't have to convince you of my situation." Monica smiles up at him.
Jason's phone rings. He finishes up the conversation to hear the tail end of a sentence.
"…he doesn't know." He wonders what Carly could be referring to that Monica would be involved in.
"I'll go make some coffee." Carly announces, "give you guys some time to talk." As she heads off to the kitchen, Monica turns to him.
"I'm sure Carly told you Sonny's alive?" she asks.
Jason nods, sitting down and motioning for her to do the same.
Monica sighs, looking sad.
"You know all I have ever wanted for you is to be happy."
Jason frowns, confused at the turn of the conversation.
"I am." He answers.
"I mean, really happy, glowing with joy, at peace." Monica answers.
Jason lifts an eyebrow, still confused.
"I don't do…glowing and at peace." He answers, making air quotes.
Monica shakes her head, looking sad.
"Yes, you do, I've seen it."
Trying to be patient, Jason takes a beat to answer.
"I'm… not him Monica." He answers, referring to the Quartermain he used to be years ago.
"I'm not talking about him." Monica answers, immediately understanding, "I'm talking about you."
The one statement leaves Jason reeling with more confusion.
The conversation is ended as Carly walks in with the coffee.
"I told Jason to just kill Peter and get it over with." Carly announces, as if it's the most normal thing in the world.
Jason is shocked when Monica agrees.
"As soon as possible. We can find another way to get rid of Cyrus."
By the time Monica leaves, Jason is still reeling. He has never seen Monica and Carly be so… civil… and in agreement. It leaves him feeling shaken.
Was it his death that got them to this point? He finds that hard to believe, since it did nothing for their relationship the first time they thought he was dead.
Three weeks later, Carly is opening a bottle of champagne.
"To no more Peter." She announces as she hands Jason his glass.
"And to bringing Sonny home." He adds.
Carly smiles back, it doesn't reach her eyes.
"Yeah." She answers.
After taking a sip he puts the glass down to look her squarely in the eye.
"Peter is dead. You can't keep changing the subject. Every time I bring up Sonny you are either stalling, or keeping something from me. Talk to me Carly."
Carly looks down then smiles at him, guiltily.
"Carly, it's me." He prods
"I know."
"What happened between us?" He answers point blank.
"What?" Carly answers, "Why would you ask that?" she asks, defensively.
"Because I know you. I know you like I know myself…" Jason starts, frustrated, "we share everything, but you aren't talking to me. You're pulling away from me. Did I do something, Carly? Did I hurt you somehow or did I betray you? Why are you pulling away from me?"
"No! No…" Carly sits forward, grab his hand, "you never betrayed me, it's nothing like that…Oh God." She takes her hand back, wiping over her face, "It's just… I understand why you want to bring Sonny home as soon as possible, but I… I'm scared… of how I will react to him… Jase, he has only been gone what? 3 months? But for me, it was longer, I grieved him, and… I moved on." She answers.
It's the shortest version she can give him. She can't tell him how she fell back in love with him, then lost him, and then everything that happened with Sonny… she had made peace with the fact that she is done with Sonny, not out of anger or hurt or anything, just done. Done loving him the way a wife loves a husband, done wanting to be with him, and she was relieved at being free. Emotionally she can't go back anymore. She will always love Sonny, but not in the way that could ever mean being with him.
"Carly, you and Sonny… you always get back together. Even if it takes some time." He says encouragingly.
Carly shakes her head, smiling sadly as she takes his hand and squeezes it.
"I know you mean well, but… I'm over Sonny, Jason, not in the we-broke-up-and-I'm-hurt-and-angry kind of way. It's the, I-can't-make-myself-love-him-again kind of way… "
Jason frowns, trying to figure out what is up with her.
"It wouldn't be the first time you fell in love with someone else and then got back with Sonny." Jason reminds her.
"I never said I fell in love with someone else." Carly answers.
"I know, you haven't told me anything. I'm flying blind here. I can't catch you when I have no idea when you are falling." Jason grounds out, frustrated.
"You can't catch me on this one, Jase." Carly answers, gently, "but just being able to see you and talked to you and touch you… is enough. It's my idea of heaven."
When she throws her arms around him, melting into him contentedly, he can't help but relax into her.
When she pulls back to look into his eyes, smiling, the peace radiating from them, with just a hint of sadness makes him lose his breath.
"You're here, you're alive. That's enough." She states, emphatically.
A week later Jason finds himself alone on the patio, a drink in his hand, staring out over the Corinthos back yard. Sonny doesn't remember them. And Jason got his first taste of what it was like for his family when he had the accident. Except Sonny isn't violent. Just disinterested. And calm. He has never seen his friend so at peace within himself. With all the trauma of his childhood wiped away, he is a different person.
Jason wondered at first if this was why Carly said she is over him. He thought that it was the change in Sonny, that this must've been what Sonny was like when he came back, but then Carly assured him that he got is memory back before he returned that time, and that he was the same Sonny as he had always been. He feels so confused. He hates the distance growing between him and Carly.
He is used to knowing what she is thinking even before she thinks it, but right now, he has no idea what she is thinking or feeling.
For the first time in his life, he realizes that he had taken it for granted that he and Carly will always be so intertwined that he didn't know where he ended and she started, but right now he feels completely cut off from her. Does she feel it? The distance? Before she would be the one trying to get the barrier out of the way, the unseen boundary between them, usually something he would construct to convince himself that he can be his own man, have a life separate from her. He stopped doing that after Russia. When he came back, he had no idea what to expect, except, he knew that Carly would be there, constant, loyal, no matter what. His lifeline.
He knew no matter what happened with Sam, at first when he came back and later when they started growing apart, he would be fine, cause Carly would be there. By the time Sam decided to end things, he had come to terms with the fact that he felt trapped in the life he had with her, that she never crossed his mind when he made decisions, business or otherwise, and that he only gave her a child to appease her.
And finally, it all boiled over in the car with Sonny as they were heading out to find Julian.
He didn't even realize that he was pulling away from Sam, but with Carly… he feels the distance. What does that say about him? He thought that she lost that kind of power over him, and yet, just being a little distant has got him smarting.
He really should figure out what this means.
He pulls back.
No. He's fine. They are fine.
She will open up when she is ready.
There is no way in this universe that she will not eventually trust him and let him back into her thoughts.
He just needs to be patient.
"Okay, strategy meeting." Jason announces as he walks into the house.
"Give me a minute." Carly answers back, "I'm almost done reheating our plates." She adds, tapping her foot impatiently in front of the microwave. She has taken to bringing food home from the Metro Court.
"What did you grab today?"
"Justin has a new recipe on the menu. He swears it will be the top item ordered before the end of the week." Carly answers, "It's a pasta dish with a name only he can pronounce. I explained to him that no one is going to order it if they can't even say it without sounding dumb." She rolls her eyes.
As the microwave dings, Jason smiles to himself.
He is imagining this distance. Carly is just being Carly. The way her thoughts just pour out unfiltered as she speaks to him is proof of that.
After depositing their plates on the table, Carly takes her seat across from him, tucking in straight away.
"It's good, though." She admits around a mouthful of the unnamed pasta dish.
"So, what are we strategizing today?" she asks.
"Cyrus." Jason answers
.
"Okay…?" Carly questions.
"I need to know everything Carly."
Between bites, Carly recounts everything from the time he got arrested to the time Cyrus was taken into custody.
"I should have known he would not go quietly." She remarks, frowning.
"What do you mean?"
"Before he was taken to Pentonville, I saw him in his hospital room and he said you would be able to remove me easily. I said you would never do that and he said something like, you won't have a choice because if you don't it would show the other families that you're… I can't remember his exact words anymore but something like caught up in my charms or my web or something like that… I mean, you get the gist… or devoid of ambition and that will make the other families think you are weak. I should have known he was planning something."
"What do you mean?" Jason asks. He generally doesn't care what people think of them.
"Oh, he was scheming with Buscema and Novak. Telling them that I was the weak link, and if you don't take me out, so are you…"
When Carly ends there and keep eating in silence, Jason puts his fork down and sits back.
"And then?" he prompts.
Carly looks up.
"And then what?" he gets that crawling sensation on the back of his neck again. She is avoiding his eyes, she's being evasive again. Whatever she is hiding started round about that time. He is not imagining this distance between them.
That lightening bolt of fear he has been experiencing every now and then the past couple of weeks strikes him again. He feels like he is losing her. And the thought makes his stomach cramp up, his heart thud dully in his ears, his chest constrict. Did he try to remove her? He would never do that. She is the reason for… all of it. He couldn't care less about the business. In a sudden moment of clarity he realizes that Carly is the reason. Just the reason. There is nothing to add to that sentence. The reason he breathes.
He shakes it off.
This is nothing new.
He needs to focus on finding what it is that she is hiding from him.
Carly forces herself to chew. Then she forces herself to swallow. All the while keeping her poker face on. There is no way she is telling him about getting engaged, getting married, falling for him so deep that she still carries the weight of it with her everywhere she goes, every time she looks at him, hear his voice, feels him entering the room. He can never know. And she truly is living her greatest fear, the one thing that scared her to the core. She never wanted to be alone in this, but she is, because this Jason hasn't allowed himself to feel again, this Jason hasn't given himself permission to fall again. And this Jason never will because Sonny is alive. This Jason will never allow himself to even have the thought that they could have it all.
"What happened next, Carly? I know in my soul that I could never hurt you. I don't care about the business. I would never remove you, so how did we handle it? You said we gave them a show of unity. That it ended with Novak and Buscema dead. How did they die?"
Carly shrugs.
"Car bomb." She answers.
"That's it?"
"Yeah." She shrugs.
"Carly, I know when you're lying. There is more to it." Jason now accuses, frustrated.
Carly puts down her fork, giving up the pretense of calm.
"Yes there is, but I'm not telling you. It's not relevant." She answers, a note of desperation in her voice.
When she storms off, he sits back, feeling like she had hit him in the gut. He wishes he could explain what he is feeling but all he can identify it as is pain. And Fear.
Is this what Carly felt like when he lied about Jake's paternity? But he only lied because he was trying to avoid her pushing him to fight for his son, because he knew no matter what, she would either make him fight for his happiness or fight for it herself. Is this the same thing? He holds on to the bond they have always had. When he pushed her away, hid things from her, it was always because he loved her and knew how much she loved him. He has to believe that it is the same with her. If he didn't, he would go insane.
It's 2am when Jason hears a tentative knock on his bedroom door.
In the darkness, he bolts up and swings the door open almost immediately. The hours of brooding has left him frustrated and on edge.
Carly is standing in front of his door, her silk nightgown haphazardly tied with just the belt, and her feet bare.
She looks like she had been crying.
"I'm sorry." Her voice is soft, scratchy.
Without a word Jason pulls her into his arms, hugging her to him, a desperation in his grip on her.
"If it's that important, you don't need to tell me." He speaks into her hair, "Just promise me we're okay."
"We're okay." Carly answers, melting into him. When he feels himself snuggling his face into her neck he pulls back. There is a switch inside him that tells him when he is crossing the line. He isn't quite sure what line that is. There is nothing wrong with a hug between friends, and yet, there is an invisible line that has always existed. A line he toed since he stopped being her boy on the side. A line he fell over only to get broken so bad he had to leave town. A line that since has always saved him from… something. Some unknown forbidden, pain filled something he can't name or imagine.
"I love you." Carly tells him.
"I love you too." He answers.
Looking more at peace Carly smiles as she backs up a step into the hallway and turn, walking back to her room looking lighter.
He knows he feels lighter.
They're okay.
By 2pm Jason finally finds a gap in his day to go to the Metro Court to see Carly. He needs to update her on Cyrus. After everything she told him he decided to take the path of least resistance. Clearly Cyrus is not about to play fair, attacking them personally and having no boundaries or code to speak of. Having him killed publicly while he is occupied in public is the only option. The fact that he can't be the one to see to this job himself leaves him with a sour taste in his mouth, but from what he could glean from everything Carly told him, not letting go of his enforcer role played a role in how everything became more and more dangerous for the people he loves.
When the elevator doors opens, he finds himself face to face with Britt Westbourne.
"Hi." She greets.
"Hi." He answers, nodding as he steps around her, his eyes already searching for Carly.
Carly said he went back to save Britt and that got him shot. She might still be digging into Cyrus. Once Cyrus is dead and gone, it won't matter. The matter dealt with, he touches Carly on the arm to bring her out of the zone she had been in, staring over the Metro Court, unseeing, looking confused.
She starts.
"Oh! I didn't feel you come in, I always know when you enter the room." Carly answers, she looks surprised. She realizes what she just said, but clearly Jason thinks it's perfectly normal.
"Because you weren't even here. Where were you?"
She shakes her head to clear it, then rounds the bar, to sit next to Jason.
"Something is off. With Michael."
Jason immediately looks alarmed.
"No, relax, not wrong-off, just timeline-off."
When Jason looks confused.
"In what way?"
"He just told me he told Willow he loves her and they have decided to have a real marriage."
"I'm glad he's happy." Jason answers, a satisfied tilt to his mouth.
"Me too but…" she looks up, "it took much longer in the original timeline and we didn't change that much did we? I mean, yeah, Peter is dead but no-one knows that yet… everyone thinks he is out of town. And we saw Sonny, but since he isn't interested in his life and he is still in Nixon falls, and not having a memory makes him a soft target for the families, we haven't broken the news to anyone yet, so, mostly we are still on the same timeline… except for the funeral… we didn't do the funeral but…"
"Exactly what are you suspecting?" Jason asks.
"What if Michael is also from my time?"
"Wouldn't he have gone to fetch Sonny yet?"
Carly pulls a face.
"They're not exactly on good terms at the moment. He may… feel that it's better for Sonny to just stay… in his new life."
When Jason keeps looking at her expectantly, she tells him a quick summary of everything that happened in the Nina related saga after Sonny returned.
"Is that why you said you are over Sonny?" Jason asks.
"Nina?" Carly asks, then shakes her head, staring off into the distance, "no, trying to be the good wife, pretending to spare his feelings, failing at it and realizing that I can't make myself feel what I'm supposed to feel for him, that… that is why I am over him. I got over him without realizing it, only once I had to pretend not to be, I realized that I am over him. I can't… it's, I'm sorry Jason, it's not there, and I can't pretend it is… not even for you."
"For me?" Jason asks, incredulously but Carly doesn't hear as a waiter is asking her a question.
Jason sits back and grimaces. These last few weeks have contained more soul searching than he would usually permit. He knows Carly stayed with Sonny initially to make him happy, but once she got with Jax and Michael got shot and everything, he told Carly he made a mistake talking her into being with Sonny. And she still got back with him after that, so he wasn't wrong about them. He realizes that he had convinced himself of that so many times and yet, here is Carly, knowing where Sonny is, and completely fine with him staying there and not being a part of her life. Was he wrong? But there was a time that they were good for each other, they could handle breaking each other, he wasn't strong enough to do that merry-go-round with Carly.
And then he has another moment of clarity as he watches Carly walk around the bar, handling something with the waiter, calm, in control, mature. Carly had grown up. She chose to make a life sans Sonny. She chose herself over the dysfunction.
When she is done with the waiter, she faces him again.
"I think I need to talk to Michael. I… my gut could be wrong but…"
"I trust you're gut." Jason answers. "Let me talk to him." Jason offers.
"Um…" Did he just catch a sliver of fear in her eyes? What is she afraid he would uncover?
"I promise I won't ask him questions that could uncover what ever it is you're not ready to tell me."
"Um…" Carly still looks undecided, then looks resolved. "Okay."
Jason reaches over to take her hand in his.
"Thank you for trusting me."
Carly smiles, tears forming in her eyes.
"Always."
Jason walks into the Quartermain den at the tail end of a conversation between Michael and Monica.
"I didn't think anyone would believe me." He is exclaiming.
"Hi!" Jason says to get their attention.
Michael and Monica both swing around to face the door.
"Michael is also from 2022." Monica informs him.
"Grandma!" Michael protests, then realizes she said "also".
"Wait? You know?" Michael looks surprised, then looks like he just realized something.
"Victor sent you here, didn't he? You were never in the rockfall!" He throws his arms around Jason.
"No…" Jason answers, hugging him back, "I have no idea what happened in Greece, but I know because Victor sent your mother here."
"Mom's here?" Michael asks as he pulls back. "She realized the timeline was off and sent you." He states.
"No, I offered."
"Of course, you did, because that is who you are. My d… Sonny would never do that."
"Michael…"
"Stop, you're always defending him! Why are you always…" Michael throws his hand up in the air, "Never mind. Because you're not him, and your loyal to family." He answers himself. "So, where is he?"
"Nixon falls. He isn't interested in his life here."
"So not much has changed, memory or no memory." Michael remarks, rolling his eyes.
Monica excuses herself to get someone in the staff to bring them some refreshments.
"Your mother said you may not go looking for him because things aren't good between you." Jason fishes for answers.
"That has nothing to do with it. I didn't want to bring him back because then I would erase all the good things that happened this year."
"Speaking of good things, congratulations on you and Willow." Jason smiles.
"I followed some good advice."
"Oh?" Jason asks.
"Don't let her go." Michael answers, smiling.
"It's good advice, who told you that?"
"You did." Michael answers, "At your wedding reception." Michael smiles.
Just then Monica enters.
"Lemonade?"
Jason is rooted to the spot.
His wedding reception? He had a wedding? Why would Carly not mention…
Before he could finish the thought, his phone beeps at the same time as Michael and Monica calls him over.
It's Carly.
"And?" is all she sent.
Jason looks up.
"I'm sorry, I have to go. Next time." he latches on to the opportunity.
He spins around and leaves.
"Where to?" the driver asks.
"Metro Court." Jason answers.
In the darkness of the car he has time to continue that thought.
"A show of unity."
"Your wedding reception"
"I'm over Sonny"
"I never said I fell in love with someone else."
"Don't let her go."
Could it be?
Jason sighs, as he rests his head back, staring at nothing.
And it dawns on him.
Monica sighs, looking sad.
"You know all I have ever wanted for you is to be happy."
Jason frowns, confused at the turn of the conversation.
"I am." He answers.
"I mean, really happy, glowing with joy, at peace." Monica answers.
Jason lifts an eyebrow, still confused.
"I don't do…glowing and at peace." He answers, making air quotes.
Monica shakes her head, looking sad.
"Yes, you do, I've seen it."
Trying to be patient, Jason takes a beat to answer.
"I'm… not him Monica." He answers, referring to the Quartermain he used to be years ago.
"I'm not talking about him." Monica answers, immediately understanding, "I'm talking about you."
"Really happy." Jason whispers, "Glowing with joy."
He lifts his head.
He believes it.
"At peace."
Just one touch from Carly, a look, a hug. That is always what had brought him peace.
Jason is standing in the Metro Court elevator, waiting to get carried up to Carly. The concierge said she is on the roof with a contractor.
Something happened to him, and he can't put his finger on it. All he knows is he feels light. And it has nothing to do with the threat of Cyrus being gone, or Peter being dead.
Once the thought had gotten hold of him that the wedding Michael was referring to could have involved Carly there is this strange sensation in his chest.
Is that hope?
Suddenly that unnamed line has been named.
Falling.
It's called falling.
Whenever he feels like he is about to cross… into falling, that is when he pulls back.
It's so glaringly obvious, he is amazed at his own ability to obscure things from himself.
Could he do that?
Could he allow himself to cross into falling?
Would she catch him?
As the elevator doors open, Jason peers around at the dusty confines of the top floor. Two guys are tiling at the far end of the entrance hall leading out to the roof, and in the distance, he hears Carly's laugh. He turns to the left, following the sound outside.
"It will be the talk of the town, that I assure you." Carly tells the pudgy man standing in front of her, a button over his bulbous stomach popped open, a whistle around his neck, a pencil above his ear and a clipboard in his hand.
"I'll communicate the opening date to my team so we can ensure the building goes according to schedule.
"Thank you."
He and Carly shakes hands.
The man turns to leave, greeting Jason with a casual salute and a smile.
Jason greets him back with a nod and a small smile.
He reigns it in.
Where did that smile come from?
"Hope." Whispers a little voice.
"And?!" Carly reiterates her text as she approaches him.
"And… he's from 2022."
"I knew it!"
"And you weren't kidding, he's angry with Sonny."
"Explains why he never brought him back."
Jason shakes his head, pulling a face.
"Yeeeaaah… He said it wasn't. He said he didn't want to erase all the good things from this year."
He watches Carly closely as a hint of sadness colors her features.
Jason sighs…
"I wish you would talk to me."
Carly looks at him, gives an ironic chuckle.
"Yeah, I kind of wish I could."
"He said something else."
"Oh?" Carly asks, she's back to avoiding his eyes as she turns and strolls slowly over the roof as if surveying the area of her latest project. Jason follows.
"Yeah, he said he followed my advice, and that's why he told Willow he loved her."
Carly stops, surprised. She turns back to face him and starts when he was still walking and ended up very close to her. She takes a step back.
"You're advice? Which was?"
Jason shrugs.
"Don't let her go."
"You told him that? I wonder when… although you and Michael spent a lot of time together." Carly relents, then shrugs as she starts strolling again. Clearly, she feels like disaster has been averted. Her shoulders are relaxed.
"He told me when." Jason answers, again strolling after her.
"Oh?"
"At my wedding reception." Carly stops, her shoulders tense.
"Oh."
Her reaction tells him everything. They got married. And Jason may be very good at hiding things from himself, but he knows, he could never marry Carly and not be her husband. He could never marry Carly and pretend to the outside world without wanting it all. He wants it all. The thought leaves him breathless for a moment.
Then he tries to get the conversation back on track. He wants to hear it from her.
"Kind of a big detail not to tell me, Carly." Jason adds, stopping right behind her.
Carly turns around, looks at him, looks away.
"Who was I marrying?"
Carly looks at him, silently, and he can see the minute her next plan clicks in place.
"I'm not going to tell you." She answers, smartly.
"Why not?"
"Because I'm not going to influence you." She replies evenly.
He lifts an eyebrow, tilts his head.
"Carly?"
"Yeah?"
"You love to influence me."
"No I don't." she scoffs.
"Did you approve of her?" he asks. He is laughing internally as he watches her trying to find an answer.
Eventually she gives up.
"It doesn't matter." She answers, stepping around him to head to the roof exit. He turns with her, almost in sync.
"It matters to me."
Without thought his hand shoots out and grabs her hand, halting her progress. There it is again. That line that he shouldn't cross, cross into falling, something inside him releases. He lets go, falls, prays that she will catch him as he yanks her back to face him. As his lips crash onto hers, the ever-present compression on his chest falls away.
It takes less than a second for Carly to realize what is happening. As the ice that had encased her since the moment she was told about Jason not coming home thaws into a fiery inferno, her arms immediately find their way around his neck.
As he pulls back, breathing hard, she finds her face is wet with tears.
Suddenly the whole sequence of events starts clicking into place. He knows himself, he knows Carly, he can fill in the gaps.
"I'm sorry." Jason whispers.
"Why?" Carly asks, fear in her eyes.
"For dying on you before we could be real." Jason answers.
"Jase…" in her eyes he can see that he's right. Sonny came back and he stepped back, because that is what he does, and while Carly was trying to pretend with Sonny, he ended up under a pile of rubble in Greece.
As the enormity of it all hits him, he kisses her again, this time forcefully, steering her toward the wall with his body until they bump against it. Instead of stopping, he uses the wall to mold her to him.
He feels whole again, not drifting somewhere separate from her, but intertwined to the point where he has no idea where he ends, and she starts. It's the way it had always been and will always be.
As he tears his lips from hers to trail kisses down her cheek to her neck he stops just long enough at her ear to whisper his plea.
"It's your turn now, catch me, Carly. I'm falling."