Thank you for all the reviews and sticking with my crazy ideas. I have a story I am working on Raze if you want more of my content in addition to a few more oneshots to be released this year. Let me know how you liked the end?
While the last base at first glance had been more of a bust. The hard drive provided a glimpse of what we were after a lead to what the next countdown would be. It was a calculated strike on an alien community living in Cuba. Batman had broken through to some communication with the preexisting user the strike team. The League back tracked their communications and kept digging until we came across an address in New Jersey from the main user.
While I was too far away to attend the raid, Team Arrow and some others had the honor of taking down the leader. A twisted doctor, Simon Amal had been messing with alien DNA on himself and was running the hate group internationally. His parents had been killed in an alien attack and he had sought revenge. Apparently he had been taking samples of alien DNA of victims in the process. He was a green mean fighting machine from Green Arrows perspective.
He was self titled as Crux and if Black Canary wasn't there to disrupt his freakishly large ears the whole mission would be a bust. A net arrow had also come in handy to combat his wings. They were able to apprehend all the necessary data to know what the countdowns meant and the names of other leaders. Green Arrow was frustrated by how high level some of the allies were within governments.
While there was data galore, there were no prisoners nor information on Starfire. She was marked eliminated in their files. They had a secondary attack for her planned that involved her being crushed by an entire building. Though they thought she was dead, the world thought she was dead, was I the only one left who thought differently?
The relief of capturing the culprit was not as satisfying, partly since I was not there in the end and I was no closer to finding an answer. There was some closure, those who hurt her were going to put away forever. Though she was still lost. I needed sometime to process so I left all my tech behind and took a walk. I just needed sometime to myself and not to have any crisis pull me away from what I actually needed to do. If she was not there and had not turned up anywhere else by now… maybe I needed to get used to the idea she was not coming back.
Would I be able to be a good leader on a healing team? Donna had done her best, but would I make much difference if I came back with all of what they had been facing. If the Hive Five had gotten their teamwork together in addition to an overwhelming tank, I might not be a turn in the tides.
It was not like I was overwhelmingly helpful here either with all the detective work. I had been off focus and frustrated easily to a point I understood Batman keeping his distance. Maybe I needed to go somewhere new, somewhere like Metropolis for a while to heal and get my head back on right. Starfire had provided balance that I had been solely missing. I would have to figure out my own solution.
I had really hoped to find her today so the disappointment stung and sliced what had been driving me so far. She had justice now, but she was still gone. Though I knew from an early age the world was far from fair, the gap seemed to widen.
I had wandered in circles around the manor for a time I did not know, when a crazed looking Alfed was running toward me.
"Master Dick! You have to return to Jump City!" He yelled in a way I had never seen him behave. He was normally very put together. Oh no I had not checked in on how the team had done in their second round with the Hive Five. I had been too dissociated to offer help. I had hoped that Red Star would be enough to handle the situation.
"Alfred! What happened?" I asked since it was weird to see him so out of sorts. He had seen a number of tragedies, war, and Gotham oddities all perfectly composed.
"They found Miss Starfire. You need to get there as fast as possible. It does not sound like she is in good shape. Bruce is already warming up the jet. Run!" He said as I stalled. She had been found. It was how I pictured this day to go she had been found. Though his frantic tone and Batman's assistance signaled not all was right. She had been gone for so long it made sense she might be in bad shape. I ran full speed to the hanger and hopped into the open capsule of the jet that was fully warm and revving. He barely waited for me to be buckled to take off.
"What do you know?" I was stupid for leaving my communicators behind.
"She is currently bleeding to death." He said in his monotone, but he was obviously trying his best to get me there, by how tightly he gripped the controls.
"How?" I asked since I had rarely even seen her bleed. Her abilities were so quick to heal herself that it was never a worry.
"She survived the nuke though the missile left a shard in her head. It is the source of the bleeding and She lost her memory." He paused. What would she be like without her memories? What would she be like without what made her, well her. So she was bleeding and without an idea of what was going on. Though she had somehow made it home.
"Does she remember anything?" I asked since if it was nothing it would sort of be like she was already dead.
"They didn't say. They just wanted you to be there so you could have a chance to see her. Jo'nn is going to come do the surgery, but there is no sugarcoating the possibilities. She's lost a lot of blood already, Dick." He was saying everything in a calm voice, but it had the opposite affect on me. He was warning me that I might only get a chance to see her one last time. It was still worth everything. I appreciated his speed.
"She's strong." I said as I have been all along.
"Has to be if she is still alive." I knew what he was implying and what his actions were. He was afraid of what would happen if we were too late and she…. I started to see if I could get a signal to the tower. The coms had been damaged inside the jet and had been a lesser priority to fix. I just wanted to hear something, get my eyes on the situation. It was Donna who answered and she had a stain of blue on her arm. Starfire's blood.
"Where is she?" I asked trying to find the right words as my heartbeat thrummed hard in fear for Starfire.
"I just moved her to her old room. She was able to talk to Galfore, and he's sending a Tamaranian doctor, but we can't wait for them to arrive. How far away are you?" While she did not know Starfire personally she still seemed rushed and panicked.
"6 minutes." Batman responded and I was impressed that he had pushed the jet so far.
"What is wrong? I haven't seen her, so give me a picture or let me see her." I was hoping Donna would just take a communicator to her room. Though she didn't.
"She has an 8 inch piece of metal from the missiles in her skull. It has lead to brain damage, blood loss, memory loss, and during the altercation today she lost her vision because of it." She went back into report mode. What altercation?
"What altercation?" I asked since I wanted to know where she escaped from.
"The Hive Five took advantage of her memory loss and was using her against us. Red Star hit her to the ground on her head and the shard sliced deeper into her brain. She was Penny Dreadful." My brain raced as a dozen components fell into place. I had assumed they had made an android based upon strength and her being described as made of steel. Starfire was physically on that level and strong enough to carry Mammoth and the other members in flight. She would be a formidable match for Donna and she had the raw tank capabilities if not strategized.
"She's been in Jump all this time… Do you know what they did to her?" She was so close, yet so out of reach. The Hive Five were not particularly kind, and they had high level of harm.
"No, we haven't gotten there, but her wound has gone untreated all this time. They were going to kill her this evening, but Jinx gave her to us instead. Raven has been helping her stabilize, but she is scared. She's blind and I think it's making trusting us harder." It was something scientifically I understood that the brain had huge portions dedicated to sight. It was strange to picture it all going dark. She wouldn't be able to see me, would there be any chance she would remember me or would I put more stress on her?
"Does she remember anything?" I asked a little more tentatively.
"She doesn't remember much of her time on earth other than the past month. Though she apparently dreamed of you. The Hive Five said you were dead so she didn't look for you, but she knows who you are even if she might not know everything." I felt a piece of me find footing after this whirlwind had swept me up.
"What do you think Wonder Girl? What are your thoughts on this?" I asked since she was there when I wasn't. I heard a scream that I knew was Starfire and my blood went cold.
"I am glad we found her, but Robin I don't know how much of the girl you remember is there. She's desperate and scared, she is not going to be the pretty picture you have in your mind." Donna warned and there was a bit of noise in the background of Cyborg and Beast Boy yelling.
"I'll have to see for myself. Thank you, Wonder Girl for everything." I said and hung up desperately willing the next time I opened my eyes for us to be there. I appreciated Batman's silence, any comments would be ignored right now. She wouldn't be able to see me, there was a chance she wouldn't remember my voice. There was a chance I would just be another stranger that she viewed as a threat. I would have to find the strength to deal with that outcome.
"We are here." He said as the giant T came into my view. There was not a great place to land within the city so he would have to hover and I would need to climb out. "Keep me updated." He said as I started to prepare for my departure.
I had thought about seeing Starfire again so many times in the past month she had been gone. I thought of her just flying inro her room in the middle of the night with her captors by the collar. I pictured her rising out of the ocean with a wave like she was returning from a habitual swim with dolphins. I pictured her with a smile flying back onto the roof right as the sun sets. I had pictured her coming in the nick of time in a fight. I had pictured her limping as if she had put up a fight, but the sight before me was something straight out of a nightmare during my time with Slade.
I had sprinted to her room barely interacting with anyone along the way, though most people were surrounding her. She was under the covers and shaking obviously by how the entire bed was moving. Her lips were mouthing something, but she did not produce enough sound for me to hear it. In one hand was Raven's hand as she was also seeming to be saying something, likely a spell. In the other was one of my pillows off my bed in a death grip to her chest. Her eyes were closed though it was clear she was awake by her energy.
Her beautiful red hair was stained like she had a water balloon of blue paint thrown at her. Though I saw the source when I took a step closer. The silver metal of the shard glittered in the light. It was smaller than I pictured, but knew it could be like an iceberg, much more below. Her face looked tight and tired. She looked a little more like Blackfire with how pointy her chin had become now that her bones were so apparent. Though there was no doubt in myself that this was the real Starfire.
"Star…" I started and remembered I probably should stick to her pre-earth name based upon her memories. Though she stopped her mouthing, which I inferred was likely praying. She prayed when things were dire.
"It's you…" She said and used Raven as leverage to sit up. Her eyes flew open, but they did not focus on me. I tried to make eye contact, but she did not hold it. "Is it him?" She turned to ask Raven and she nodded before saying a verbal yes. Raven waved more forward and prepared me to take her place.
"She remembers the first time you showed her your eyes and a few other memories. We do not know why or how, but she just does. Jo'nn will be here shortly try and keep her calm." She said and gave me a short hug which was surprising, but not unheard of in such stressful scenarios.
"Hi." I said as I took her hands and felt that she was colder than normal. She was colder than me. I instantly added my other hand in attempt to share what warmth I had with her. It seemed best to give her a cue of where I was in the room. Her head turned but she had closed her eyes again.
"Greetings." Her Starfire signature response was what I needed to hear. "What is your name? I know your voice, your looks, and you, but the name Robin does not fit." She tilted herself so she was closer to me.
"Well, that is the name you know me by most often, but you know my real name. I know you by Starfire, but I know you are Koriand'r." I said and then got close so she could hear my name whispered in her ear. She sighed in response.
"Thank you, I feel a bit better knowing that." She said and tried to smile, but it was forced.
"How are you feeling?" It was a stupid question, but everyone had told me how she was doing that I needed it out of her mouth. She was the only one who could give that answer that mattered.
"Like I am in a bad dream. I just keep hoping to wake up when I open my eyes, but I am still stuck." It was not quite a scientific answer on her status, but it allowed me to see more through her Starfireism. I couldn't imagine her terror at losing her sight in addition to her existing injury.
"They're going to try and fix that. I am sorry I didn't find you sooner. This is my fault." I said the words I had been feeling all this time. It pained me to see her wound. That she had been in this state likely the entire time. The smell of burnt caramel was not as offensive as the smell of human blood, but it made my stomach turn nonetheless. I knew what it was. The Hive Five had so mockingly called her Candy since she was bleeding to death in front of their eyes. They hadn't helped her and made her suffer more fighting their battles.
"I doubt it is your fault I have this in my head. Just focus on that you are here now. They said you might not be able to come and I am glad they were wrong. I wish I could see you..." She said and I saw tears start to well up in her eyes.
"It's okay you will soon. There is someone who is going to get the shard out and Raven can help you heal. We are going to take care of you until you are back to normal." I said though I did not know what was waiting for us beyond this. She took a deep breath.
"Are you going to stay? I heard you've been gone." I knew she was asking me to stay in her own way.
"I've been gone looking for you. I have no reason to go away now." I said in a half truth.
"Good." She said and shifted indicating she wanted to sit up. She didn't have the strength so I pulled her up and got a better view of the damaging shard. The bandages covered it, but I got to see the size. How had they just let it sit in her head so long? Why had no one helped her?
I hated that as her covers fell off I saw what everyone else must have freaked out about. She had lost so much weight. She might even be smaller than when we first met when she had been starved in the prison ship. She looked… like she had grown weaker and weaker each day I hadn't found her.
"Staying awake is becoming more difficult…can I just." She said and opened up her arms. I knew she just wanted to be held without admitting weakness. She had done the same when she had first come to Earth finding excuses for closeness and comfort.
"Always." I said and moved closer so she could cuddle against me. I didn't even hesitate to take off my boots, just let her head fall onto my chest so she could listen to my heart. My arms wrapped around her, but I was scared of squeezing her too tight. She felt fragile and strangely cold. She always felt like a sunshine, natural comforting warmth. It racked up the AC bill in Summer, but out of all things, worth it to keep her in my arms.
"Thank you." She whispered seeming to settle and find comfort. She would likely be asleep quickly if she was struggling to stay awake. Though a spike of melancholy struck my heart as I remembered those were the last words before the bomb as well. I had thought of that often in the past month. Her last words were an acknowledgement of battle directions. Now they were potentially the same if something went wrong. My heart must have shifted rhythms since she lightly patted the space next to her face as if she was trying to fix my heartbeat to something she wanted. I heard her mumble the Tamaranian equivalent of shut up towards my heart. Though I knew it was more a call to settle. I could not help laughing lightly as her silly frustration was so refreshing to see once again. She just wrapped herself tighter and nestled into my chest before her breathing noticeably evened out.
If worse came to worse, I could live with this moment on repeat in my mind.
The Tamaranian doctor arrived 16 hours after Jo'nn had successfully removed the shard. Her wound had closed without stitches and with speed unexpected. Her body must have been waiting and waiting for the chance to finally heal. They had just left her to suffer all this time. She had slept through the removal easily, and briefly woke when I tickled the sole of her foot just to check she could wake up. She was still adorably ticklish, but she did not stay conscious long. Her sight had not returned so her pillow throwing retaliation was off.
The Tamaranian doctor was amazed she was alive and attributed it to her Royal blood. I was going to be turned off by sweets for a long time after smelling so much of her 'royal' blood. He had brought along multiple diagrams and research about the Tamaranian brain physiology which Raven took to researching immediately. Apparently their brains were somewhat familiar to humans. They had different hemispheres and had similar placement of function. Though in their lower brain they had an extra cortex that had focus on partner memories. It had not been damaged.
The shard had sliced her frontal lobe that held memories and in addition her occipital lobe that controlled vision in the fight with Red Star. He had sent an apology teddy bear, card, bouquet, and week worth of borsh as an apology for unknowingly giving her brain damage.
The doctor was amazed that it had not damaged any of her motor function. Though gave a warning if her sight could not be recovered…mercy was necessary. It had caused some uproar when proposed, but he explained that her battle training and reflexes would make her paranoid constantly. I knew he was also applying her PTSD, but I knew that was a subject Tamaranians dodged at all turns. He was hopeful of Raven's abilities and had brought bottles of a vitamin shake that would help her rapidly replenish blood cells.
We woke Starfire up briefly to let her talk to the doctor. She spoke rather harshly with him and the Tamaranian was hard to keep up with. Though I assume he had spoken something nerve wracking first. Though she spoke her consent to Raven in English in a much nicer tone.
I wonder how much we actually remember in the end? Do brains have a limited capacity that discretely deletes things before you can notice? Do we hold onto everything, but so much is just never recalled? How long does it take to forget?
I hope I never forget Starfire's smile the second she could see me again.
The doctor recommended that we heal her brain that dealt with memories in smaller chunks. He wanted some of the natural healing to take part in hopes more would simply come back. Though he warned us not to expect any miracles.
Though if he had known Starfire like I did he would know I have realistic expectations of her.
"Beast Boy can you please quiet the video games, Raven is debating doing the 'finishing' of you." She said as he and Cyborg were engaged in a heated match of Mortal Kombat. Each session she had with Raven brought more memories and more comfort with us.
"Sorry Rae!" He shouted as he looked back and Cyborg took total advantage.
"Booyah!" Cyborg shouted and Starfire shook her head and giggled at their antics. She was helping Raven tidy up Tower after a mango smoothie mishap that no one claimed.
She had started to hug more often in the beginning to get used to us again. I knew no one actually minded, not even Raven. Being Starfire deprived had taken a toll on us all.
Originally she had been so apologetic to Wonder Girl that she could not remember her. Though once the ice had broken that there wouldn't be any memories to find, she made it her mission to make some. Donna liked her energy and her interest in going out to the city. She was looking forward to her fully healing so she could get a much wanted 'rematch'.
I just could not help comparing the relief I felt having my team whole and more. Donna was going to stay until Starfire was fully recovered.
"Starfire make sure you're ready by 6 or we are going to miss our reservation." I said leaving my team to get ready myself. Tuesday date nights were fully back into effect.
"I would not miss it for anything." She replied sweetly and I heard an excited giggle. She would not. I had decided that date nights were worth calling in some coverage. There was no way I would have a repeat. I had lost her once and would never take advantage of the luxury of her by my side. She was not something I would risk losing ever again.