Chapter 18

Moonpaw

Moonpaw felt numb. Her body was numb and her mind was numb, the only thing registering to her was the body of her father. If that's what happened to father, what about mother? What about Sun? Dear StarClan, Sun is probably dead!

The small gray she-cat let out another wail of grief. The dawn patrol had heard the noise and found her, looking blankly down at the body. Their ears all flattened at the sound.

"Shut up, kit!" Umberglare snapped. "Or else I'll claw that tongue right out of your filthy rogue mouth!"

Moonpaw couldn't even be angry. The only emotion she felt was absolute despair. She didn't have many memories of her father, but he was still her father.

"This is probably one of the rogues who gave birth to that thing," Littlefire scoffed. "I'm tempted to bury the body just to shut her up."

"Just throw it in the river," Sagesnap suggested. "No rogue deserves a burial."

Now, Moonpaw was angry. She snapped out of her trance and whirled around to face the patrol, ears flattened. "He is not a rogue, and he does deserve a proper burial, you dung-eating foxhearts!" She snapped. "Shall I remind you who helps heal you when one of you incompetent mangepelts steps on a thorn and complains you're about to die?!" She knew tempting these warriors was a terrible idea, but she didn't care. She wanted justice for her father's death.

Umberglare whacked Moonpaw across the muzzle with unsheathed claws. "Silence, rogue! We could drive you out just as easily as we took you in. Sagesnap, take this 'incompetent mangepelt' back to camp and make sure she doesn't cause any trouble." He spoke in a mocking tone when he repeated her words.

The blow had stung, but not as much as seeing her father. "He was my father," she choked out eventually as Sagesnap lead her back to camp. Tears pricked at her eyes.

"Save it for someone who cares," Sagesnap scoffed.

Even though she was facing the opposite direction, she could still see the body of her father. It was like the image had been seared into her eyelids and no amount of herbs could ease the pain.

The rest of the walk back was silent, except for Moonpaw's occasional, quiet sobs. Neither cat had anything to say to the other. Sagesnap seemed irritated that he had been the one chosen to take the medicine cat apprentice back to camp.

"Dear StarClan, Moonpaw, you're a mess!" Hornetflame commented as the two stepped into camp. "Honestly, why do you always insist on sneaking away and getting yourself into trouble?" He said, irritated.

Moonpaw's ears flattened and she wanted to be mad but the grief was still tugging at her heart. "I think I would have been better off staying in camp," she said miserably as she trudged over to the medicine den. "StarClan, I need— I don't even know. Thyme? Please, Hornetflame, just something to make me feel any less awful than I do now. I want to sleep for a moon."

"I didn't expect it to be this bad," Hornetflame snorted. "We can't waste herbs on trivial things like this. We should save thyme for cats who are in shock or processing the death of someone."

"I am processing the death of someone, you mouse-brain!" Moonpaw wailed, unable to contain her emotions any longer. "I just saw the rotting body of my father! If you don't want to waste your precious herbs on a 'rogue' like me, fine! The medicine cat code might as well be a huge pile of fox dung, anyways!" She left Hornetflame, who didn't reply, behind, managing to slip into her nest before breaking down, curling in on herself and sobbing into her own fur. Was this all just a punishment from StarClan? For what, though? Being born and happening to wake up on clan territory one day? She wouldn't wish life in RiverClan on even her worst of enemies.

Mother, Sun, please… you're all I have left, if you're even alive! Please be okay… please…

Sun… all I wish is that I could see your face, one last time. Please, sister, I just want to see you again.

Moonpaw fell asleep with the image of her sister in her mind. Perhaps they would meet again.