We had been back in Phtia for some time and life became routine again. Jason reached his first year of life without difficulty. He grew faster each day and began to walk quickly. Both of my sons kept me busy and running all over the palace chasing after them. Leo soon began to talk more and I found his chatter quite amusing. Achilles always teased that he had a mouth just like mine, never ceasing. I would just roll my eyes sarcastically and keep on going. Sometimes I wondered who was more mature, my husband or my sons. Knowing that it would make it more difficult for me, he taught our sons how to make bigger splashes during their bathtime. When I learned of this, I made Achilles bathe the boys before their bedtimes.

During the day, I would take Leo and Jason out and about through the palace, to the gardens, and the fountain that was in the courtyard while Achilles was busy dealing with matters of state. Most days, he would make time to come see us around mid-day to eat with us. Leo and Jason enjoyed their time with their father. I saw so much of him in the boys, especially Leo, who grew to look more and more like Achilles everyday. We were happy. It had been months since I lost our third child, but time had healed the wounds that loss had left. Though I still missed the thought of having that third child, I knew that it was safe with the gods. Achilles had remained by my side through the whole situation, taking Leo and Jason when I needed to rest and holding me at night when I did cry. It was reassuring to know that he was there and never going to leave me. We had recovered and were now taking life one day at a time with our family.

One evening, after Leo and Jason had been put to bed, I came back to our bedroom and found Achilles sitting on the side of the bed. He was carving a new toy for Jason to play with: a wooden lion. He had already made many for Leo, so he was an expert on animals made of wood. I watched him and smiled, knowing how much care he was putting into a toy for our son. Quietly, I walked over and gently took the knife and lion out of his hand, putting them on a nearby table. When I turned around, his facial expression was that of confusion. I came over and sat next to him on the bed. Without hesitation, I leaned forward and kissed him. He kissed back softly, but I aimed to make it more passionate. I brought my hands to the sides of his face, pulling him closer to me. I wanted him and I could tell how much he wanted me too. We had not made love since before I lost our third child. A moment later, he pulled away.

"No," he said firmly.

"Why not?" I pleaded.

"It's still too soon," he replied, caressing my cheek with his hand.

"But I am fully recovered."

He paused and I knew that he really did not want to refuse me. I tried to kiss him again, but again he pulled away.

"Please tell me why you won't make love to me."

"I do not wish for you to suffer losing another child. That is the risk we take if I make love to you again." He held my hands gently. "I could not bare to watch you go through that again."

A tear slipped from the corner of my eye down my cheek. "You have not been able to look at me the same since I lost the baby."

"It is not that at all. I love you and that will never change, but after our child was lost, I blamed myself for not taking better care of you. I should have known you were with child again by the changes in your body."

"It was different with that child. Not even I could feel the changes beginning to happen. With Leo and Jason, I could sense something was different," I reasoned. "Perhaps the gods knew something was wrong and decided to take the child before it could experience any pain."

"Perhaps...but it was still agonizing to watch you go through that grief and anguish."

I placed my hand on his chest gently. "I am sorry that I did not recognize your pain as well as my own. I was so wrapped up in my own grief that I did not take the time to help you through your own."

"It was not your's to bear." He took my hand and kissed it softly.

"But you are my husband and any pain you feel, I feel it too." I laid my head on his shoulder.

He wrapped his arm around my back and rested his hand on my waist. "I did not wish to burden you with more pain when you were already so grieved from losing the child. I have found peace with what happened."

"Have you truly?" I inquired, knowing my husband's personality.

Achilles paused for a moment and I already knew. "In truth," he said, "I grieved privately for the child we will never know. I had hoped that maybe it were a dream that I would wake up from and you would be telling me that all was well and that we were with child."

"I hoped the same many nights after..."

"Briseis, I wanted that child the moment they told me we had lost it. In my heart, I wanted for us to have another child-perhaps a daughter."

I smiled weakly. "I have been dreaming of that since we first married on the beaches of Troy. The same little girl is in my dreams, then and the night I lost the baby."

"You have dreamt of our daughter?" He asked, looking down into my eyes.

"Yes, I have," I replied softly. "In my dreams, she looks so much like you with golden hair and the same blue eyes. She is beautiful."

"We will have another child in time, I promise you this."

He kissed my forehead and got up from our bed, walking out onto the balcony. I laid down on our bed and thought of everything he had said. In truth, I knew he was right and that we were not ready to even think of having another child. But, the nagging thought was still there of that little girl I had long ago dreamed of and now feared I might never have. More than anything, I wanted a daughter to share things with and to teach about the world. I wanted to see her grow up and be held in her father's arms, safe and loved. I wanted her to come to me when she fell in love for the first time and tell me all about the boy. And I wanted to tell her of the love story that happened between me and her father long ago on the beaches of Troy. These were the things a mother was supposed to do and share with her daughter, a daughter I so desperately wanted.

I rolled over to see my husband climbing into bed with me. He kissed me and pulled me close, caressing my hair. A few minutes later, I fell asleep. While sleeping, I had the same dream of my daughter on the beach. This time, however, she was an infant in my arms. I felt her little body warm against mine. She was asleep and content. Her face was so serene that I could not bare to move her in case I should wake her up. I was walking through the sand as the water lapped over my feet. The ocean sounds kept her asleep in my arms as the waves rolled in and out. I could feel that all was right with the world.

When I woke in the morning, Achilles was already awake, but still in bed with me. He leaned forward and kissed my lips softly. I loved waking up like this. It had been some time since we had last just laid in bed together in the morning. I enjoyed it because it was peaceful without our sons jumping on the bed and wanting to play. Times like this reminded me of our nights together on the beaches of Troy when he would just hold me and we would talk for hours. I leaned forward and kissed his lips again. Only, our kiss was cut short by the little pitter patter of feet across our floor. I looked up to see Leo and Jason standing at the foot of the bed. Achilles smiled and pulled both of them on the bed with us. Jason jumped into my arms and gave me his 'good morning' kiss. He was my precious angel. Leo immediately began wrestling with his father. I laughed as Achilles held him above his head, making Leo giggle and squirm. Jason laughed and clapped his hands in approval.

I leaned over and whispered in Jason's ear, "Go get your father. Go on."

Jason got out of my lap and walked over to Achilles, latching on to one of his arms as he still held Leo over his head. He put Leo down and grabbed Jason, causing him to squeal with laughter. Both of the boys tried to tackle Achilles, but he caught both of them and pinned them to the bed. He began to tickle them, sending them both into fits of giggles. Their play continued until both Leo and Jason wore themselves out and fell asleep. Achilles and I laid down on either side of the boys. They were in between us, in the middle of our bed and our lives.

I looked over at Achilles and smiled. "I wish they could stay this little forever."

"They're growing so fast that I cannot remember where the time goes."

"Soon enough they'll be picking up their first swords and learning to ride a horse." I mused, looking down at my sons as they were sleeping. "They will want to be just like their father."

"A father that could not be prouder of his two sons than I am of Leo and Jason."

I smiled again and watched them sleep. They were happy off in their own little dreams and I was not going to wake them.

A while later, Leo and Jason woke from their naps and Achilles took them back to the nursery to play for the morning while I got dressed. I put on one of my favorite dresses, my emerald green one with the gold trim and ribbon. When Achilles returned, I was trying to put on a necklace that matched, but could not get the chain to clasp in the back. He came over and moved my hair and clasped the chain for me, stopping to place a soft kiss on my neck before moving my hair back into place. He knew I loved that. I had always loved when he kissed the back of my neck. I turned around and faced my husband. There was a look in his eyes, one of pain. My husband rarely ever showed such pain as what was in his eyes at that moment.

"What is wrong?" I asked, putting my hands on his chest.

"I have to leave," he replied.

"Leave?"

"Yes, Troy is in need of my help. Some of the northern countries are pressing on them, so Priam is sending an army to fight. I received his letter a few days ago and I sent reply that the Myrmidons would help."

A tear forced its way down my cheek. I knew that this day would come again. My husband was the greatest warrior in Greece, so he was always needed to help in some war. "How long will you be gone?"

"A few weeks. We set sail in a few days time. Eudorus and Patroclus are gathering the rest of the Myrmidons and readying our ship."

"Promise you'll come back to me." I brought my hand and gently placed it on the side of his face.

He placed his hand over mine, bringing it to his lips and kissing my palm. "Always."

I laid my head on his shoulder and he held me. As his wife, I wanted him to stay here with me and our sons, but as a former Princess of Troy I knew that Priam would only call my husband if they truly needed him. So, we would spend our last few days together before he left and I would pray to the gods that they would bring him home safe to me and our sons. He continued to hold me close. I knew that in the coming weeks, I would miss him holding me like this. I would miss having someone in the bed next to me to keep me warm at night. And I knew that our sons would miss their father. So, as he held me, I took the time to memorize every part of him. Though I already knew every part of him, it gave me something to focus on. Achilles leaving would be hard all around, so I wanted all the time I could have with him now.