A/N: Not mine.

"I'm getting a little worried," Satomi confided to Kotoko and Jinko.

"Yeah, what about?" Jinko's eyes nearly crossed as she savored a bite of their favorite cafe's newest cake.

"Kin-chan."

"Oh, yes, the resident splinter in our finger," Kotoko sighed. "What?" She looked at her friends. "He's just as annoyingly painful."

"And I'm afraid that he might be infected," Satomi added darkly.

"Kin-chan's sick?" asked Jinko.

"Must you always be so literal? No, he's acting weird. And yes," she waved a hand, "weirder than usual."

"I've been ignoring him ever since he had his little hissy fit after Valentine's," Kotoko reminded her.

"Yes, all that fuss about not getting candy. Gintaro and Dozo told me that he had this disturbing idea that you skipped school to prepare for his seduction."

"Not while I'm eating, Satomi," Kotoko groaned.

"Yeah, that was almost enough to make this cake taste bitter," said Jinko before spearing another bite, "but not quite."

"And then, since he was the only one from our class who didn't qualify for college, the teachers named him the male representative for Class F at graduation."

Kotoko frowned. "And I'm still mad about that, as I'm the other and I was the top scorer. It's like they're rewarding him for goofing off and punishing me by making me put up with him."

"Well, they feel a little sorry for him, I heard, because everyone else doing well made them think that he was a failure on their part."

"No, the entire class was a failure on their part," Jinko spoke up. "If Irie-kun and his friends hadn't helped us, we all would be in the same boat."

"So do you think Kin-chan knows that this is either a pity or guilt appointment and will make some sort of scene?" Kotoko asked, concern on her face. "Because I know that Mrs. Irie is going to be there, most likely with at least three cameras. I don't want him to ruin her son's graduation video."

"That's what I've been thinking, and if you've reached the same conclusion then it's probably his plan."

"Drat!" Kotoko slumped. "I'd nope out of the ceremony except that Otosan is so excited about me being a class rep. Oh, well, we'll just keep our eyes peeled and hope for the best."

"Yeah," Jinko pointed her fork at them, "hope for the best and plan for the worst."

"Oh, Ai-san, what a jour spécial!" Mrs. Irie's burblings managed to penetrate Mr. Aihara's brain, foggy from a late night at the restaurant, only because he was gripping a large mug of high-test coffee. "Our babies, graduating. And together! Who would have thought it?"

"Anyone who knew we were the same age and going to the same school." Naoki nodded his head in a quick bow before sitting at the breakfast table.

"You and your smart mouth–" His mother's smile wavered but a moment before her expression grew canny. "Of course, all of us would be pleased if the 'together' part had a–dirons-nous?–deeper meaning."

"Still not falling for your schemes, Ma." He swallowed a bite of sausage before glaring at her. "Don't tell me that you're going to make a big production of this like you did in September."

"I have no idea to what you refer." She averted her gaze and cried as another entered the kitchen, "Yuuki-kun! Are you ready for the big day?"

Naoki glanced at his brother. "No school uniform on a school day. Yep, she's going to embarrass us."

Kotoko, slipping into the seat beside him, murmured, "So what else is new?"

He flashed her a grin. "Ready for the spotlight, Miss Class F?"

"Ready for your speech, Mr. Class A?" she teased back.

"I just reworked the trite one I used at school opening," he retorted. "You remember that one? The day you fell for Watanabe?"

"No, I really don't. I suppose I'll have to pay attention this time."

"Finally! The day has arrived!"

Dozo and Gintaro stared at Kinnosuke's 'winner pose' before the latter asked, "I didn't think you were that excited about graduating high school."

"He could have used some of that energy for studying," the other muttered.

"Nah! Doncha see it? Today's the day I see the last of Irie. With him off to Todai," the boy rubbed his hands in glee, "my way will be clear to woo my Kotoko."

"Uh, Kin. Number one," Dozo raised his pinky finger, "this is just the last day of high school, not the first day of college."

"Yeah, yeah," he waved it away, "it's just a way of putting it."

"And two, Irie isn't going to Tokyo University."

"Yeah, the Class A teachers were up in arms about it. It seems like he decided not to take the entrance test."

"Well, it don't matter. That egghead will be able to get into any college. I don't care where: Nagoya, Kyoto, Tohoku–as long as he stays away from Osaka; I don't wanna run into him when I visit family there."

"You see–"

"Shoot, maybe I'll even get lucky and he'll go somewhere out of the country. Yeah," his eyes grew dreamy, "a Japan without that asshole would be like heaven on earth."

"–he's going to attend Tonan U."

"Hah, good one Gin-kun! As if his hoity-toity family would let him do that. No," he waved a chiding finger at him, "don't you try to spoil my good mood on this glorious day."

"Okay, you got me." Gintaro raised his arms in surrender. "Enjoy the ceremony."

Dozo leaned towards him to mutter, "Let someone else spoil his good mood for a change."

"Well, you notice I didn't mention number 3, that Kotoko still wouldn't go out with him, even if Irie was gone."

"Kin-chan, stop grabbing my arm!" Kotoko hissed as the representatives marched down the center aisle in class alphabetical order.

"Aw, Kotoko, it's like the beginning of our lives right now, getting out of this school. And just think, a year or so and we'll be going down another aisle," he winked, "one in a church."

"Are you sure that you weren't dropped on the head as a baby?"

"Ai-kun, why is Kotoko acting so twitchy?" Mr. Irie was the only member of the family without a device at his eyes providing magnification power.

"It's that cheater with the potty mouth standing next to her," Yuuki informed him, using child-sized binoculars to focus on the sight.

Mr. Aihara's teeth grated in anger behind the video camera. "He keeps trying to touch her arm."

"No, he wants to hold her hand," Mrs. Irie corrected, zooming in and clicking the shutter automatically. "That's right, Kotoko-chan," she yelled, "keep away from that cochon!"

Naoki turned a laugh into a cough then angled forward slightly to see Kotoko's red cheeks at the other end of the line of representatives facing the audience. Too bad that his prediction of motherly embarrassment was coming true.

"…In conclusion, although we may be leaving today, a bit of Tonan High School will always remain with us."

Polite applause (and a few exuberant cheers from the Irie/Aihara group) rewarded Naoki's valedictory speech.

The headmistress then took the podium. "Thank you, Mr. Irie. Now for the Presentation of Diplomas. Will the other representative from Class A take her position?"

As the students distributed the parchments, Kotoko yawned and shifted ever nearer the Class E students due to Kinnosuke's gradual encroachment upon her personal space. Finally it was their turn.

Kotoko bowed after being handed her stack and stepped back for Kinnosuke to receive his. Instead, he snatched the microphone from its stand on the podium and faced the crowd, a wide grin on his face.

"Hello, Ladies and Gentlemen!" The grin faded slightly when there was no enthusiastic response from the shocked students and family members, but he continued. "I know this is a little unord– inortho– not what you expected, but I would like to take this opportunity to declare my love for this beautiful girl: Aihara Kotoko!"

"Oh, holy crap on a cracker!" Kotoko buried her face in the diplomas, wishing that the stage had a trapdoor so she could disappear and crawl out the back.

Mr. Aihara was not pleased with the announcement. "How dare you use my daughter's name, you pervert!"

"Well, now, Father–"

"Don't call me that, you abuser of women and children!"

"–we got off on the wrong foot, but surely you can see that I am her perfect match. Why, you can almost see the red string of fate binding us together."

"Irie?" Watanabe bent towards his classmate. "You going to do something about this? That is your girlfriend he's ranting on about."

"I'll just wait until the time is right. I have a feeling my mother isn't through venting her spleen yet."

Sure enough, "I was assured that the school administration would protect my sweet girl from that-that bounder!" was heard from the back. "Instead you have forced her into a position le plus inconfortable. What say you to that, Principal Jintama?"

Whatever the headmistress was trying to reply could not be heard, for she was no longer in possession of the microphone. Several staff members were trying to tug it from the recalcitrant student's grasp, creating quite a scuffle. The audience had now taken sides, cheers and catcalls flying through the air.

Kotoko, having reached her limit, slammed her stack of papers back onto the table and stomped down the stairs, heading towards the Class A seating.

"What–?" Watanabe began.

"I think it's the right time," Naoki whispered, rising to his feet.

"You!" Kotoko shouted. "Kin-chan!"

The boy froze and one of his opponents plucked the microphone from his grasp. "Kotoko," he called at full volume, which proved that he had not needed electronic assistance to be heard in the gymnasium, "why're you standing so close to that bastard Irie?"

"My parents were married several years before my birth, Ikezawa," Naoki cheerfully informed him.

"Damn straight!" His mother affirmed that statement from the back. The three males with her jumped and stared, startled at the mild profanity.

"Don't cloud the water, you son of a bitch."

"It's a bad move to insult my mother," he warned mildly. A quick glance behind confirmed his suspicions; Mrs. Irie was now pushing her way past other seated parents. "Well, too late now."

"You leave Obasama out of this," Kotoko raged. "All of this is your fault! You just don't listen! I have never been in love with you, am not in love with you, and will never be in love with you."

"Nice use of tenses there, Kotoko."

"Thank you, Naoki. Your tutoring helped me a lot. And another thing," she turned back to the object of her ire, "you were offered help with your grades but acted the fool and turned it down. So what happened? You are the only senior here who cannot attend college."

"Yeah, but college ain't everything. Why, once I take over Dad's restaurant–"

"The hell you say!"

Mr. Irie gave up on trying to catch his wife and instead held fast to his old friend. "Not now, Ai-kun. Let's see how the young ones handle it."

"With Irie gone off to college and all, it'll be mighty lonely for you. I bet in just a month or two you'll be begging for me to pour on the old Kin-chan charm," he informed her smugly.

"You imbecile!" Kotoko stomped a foot. "Naoki and I are going to college together! Here! And don't look so surprised; I know Dozo and Gintaro told you, but you never listen. Wait, I already said that. Well, if words won't convince you, maybe this will."

Turning, she grabbed Naoki by the lapels of his jacket and proceeded to kiss him at great length and with much fervor. Thus it was that he offered Mrs. Irie no fight when she arrived at that moment to whale upon him with her purse.

When she turned to discover what had so paralyzed her opponent, a cry of despair flew from her lips. "Why now, mes enfants? When I have no camera to document it?"

T/N: Jour spécial=special day; dirons-nous?=shall we say?; cochon=pig; le plus inconfortable=most uncomfortable; mes enfants=my children.