June 11, 1941
A week late. More than a couple days, more than what could be explained by stress or illness or something else usual. The first few were a little concerning but Jen hadn't been too bothered. Not yet, at least.
And Nick had been out of town. He was contacted by the feds to go help with prepping Abe Reles for his grand jury testimony. Jen had been staying alone at her apartment with her cat for the four days Nick was away from Manhattan. He hadn't actually told her where he was going, just that he'd be away. And that was fine. She knew not to ask questions.
But being alone with her worries made things worse. Because it had been a week now, and she was worried. She and Nick weren't as careful as they should have been. It had been stupid, the way they'd carried on without thought about this possibility. It was just that they were so happy, and Jen was pretty sure that neither of them wanted to break the magic spell of their life together. They were professional and friendly at work and nothing more. And then they were perfectly in love when they went home—to his or to hers—together.
For all that happiness, Jen may have gotten herself into trouble. A week late was a lot for her. A week late probably meant she was pregnant. And pregnant meant that her career was over. She meant what she'd told Nick all those months ago when she'd broken off their romance, that he wanted to get married and have kids but she wasn't sure she was ready and wasn't even sure she wanted any of that at all. She wanted to be a Homicide detective. And she was. Her life with her work and with Nick at home was perfect. She didn't want to lose any of it. And while she was not worried about losing Nick anymore—if she was pregnant, he'd marry her and they'd have their baby and be a family and figure out all the rest—but she was worried about losing her job. She'd be tossed out of the NYPD as soon as anyone found out she was pregnant. If her being a woman wasn't bad enough, being pregnant and being a mother would be too far beyond the pale.
But she didn't know anything for sure yet. A week could mean she was pregnant or she was just a week late. Maybe there was all this worry for nothing. Maybe it would be fine and when Nick came home, she'd just have to tell him they needed to be more careful.
Jen tried to get through her workday by focusing on work. There was plenty to do, so it was relatively easy. Simon was having some troubles, and Matt wasn't taking command very well, so there was some tension in the squad room that distracted her from her own problems. But Duncan was there, cracking jokes and cheering them all up.
Just after lunch, Jen made her way to the restroom. She thought nothing of it, thanks to the distractions of the day. But the pregnancy problem suddenly came to the forefront of her mind. Mostly because she very clearly was not pregnant. Just a week late.
Tears filled her eyes. A wave of relief crashed over her so violently that Jen hardly realized how upset about it she really was until this weight was lifted off her. She wasn't pregnant. Everything was fine. Thank god.
Only…the relief dissipated and something hollow settled in her belly. The tears fell anew when Jennifer realized that she had been worried, yes, but a part of her had been happy about the idea of having a baby. A baby with Nick of their very own, created and born of the love they'd found amidst the madness of the world.
The sound of a toilet flushing in the men's restroom next door shook Jen out of her thoughts and reminded her that she was at work and couldn't think about this now. She calmed down and fixed herself up. As she washed her hands, she looked at herself in the mirror and saw a bit of redness in her eyes to show she'd been crying. Well, hopefully no one would notice.
Famous last words.
Jen returned to her desk and found Nick sitting at his. He must have just come back from wherever he was and come right to work. He probably had the day off, but Jen knew that he would not want to wait until the end of the day before they saw each other. Nick looked at her and smiled to see her. His expression immediately faltered when he noticed her appearance. He knew she'd been crying. Of course he did.
"Step outside with me?" he asked quietly.
She just nodded. They went out to his car and got in, closing the doors and hiding away from the world in plain view.
"I missed you," he said quietly.
"I missed you, too," she answered. Damn, her voice was a little hoarse.
"What's wrong?" Nick wasn't going to beat around the bush. He always was direct and straightforward, and Jen was glad of it now.
But how could she tell him? She didn't want to keep it from him. And it was something they'd have to talk about. She just didn't want to. Not right now. Unfortunately, Jennifer knew they didn't have much of a choice just now. She sighed. "I thought I might have been pregnant," she confessed. "I'm not," she added quickly. "But I was worried I might have been and what it would mean, but then I found out just now that I'm not and…I dunno, I'm a little disappointed, I guess."
Nick was quiet for a moment. Jen couldn't look at him as she spoke, but when he didn't answer right away, she looked over to him. He was staring out the front windshield, his face unreadable. But at last, he turned to her. "Jen?"
"Yeah?" she answered expectantly.
"Will you marry me?"
Jen felt like she'd been dunked in the East River. "What?!"
"Not right now. Not even this year if you don't want. But I love you. I wanna marry you. I want to have babies. Again, not right now. But if it happens, I want us to be married. And I don't just want to get married because of a baby. I want to marry you because I love you and I wanna be with you forever."
Tears filled her eyes yet again, which would have annoyed her if it were any other circumstance. But the tears were different this time. "I want that too," she told him, her voice cracking with emotion and a little bubble of laughter escaped her. "Yes, Nick, I'll marry you."
His face broke out into a magnificent grin. "I can't kiss you in the car at the station like this, but just know that I want to."
She laughed again. "You can kiss me when we go home later. We can figure it all out later, but we have to go back to work."
Nick agreed, and they got out of the car. They couldn't kiss or embrace or even hold hands, they knew, but as they walked back into the station, Jen brushed the back of her fingers against his. For right now, that was enough. They'd have more later. They'd have everything later.
November 12, 1941
It was a Wednesday. Nick and Jen were in the middle of breakfast. She was going to work and he had the day off for the trial set to start today. Albert Anastasia was on trial for murder, and Abe Reles was going to testify and send the bastard up to Sing Sing.
Nick had been going to visit Abe at his hotel in Coney Island once a week for the last three months. He knew all about this trial and how proud Abe was to be able to do something good and useful with his life. Getting scum off the streets and cleaning up the criminal organizations that had been plaguing the city for decades. Abe had been one of them for a long time, but Nick liked to think that he had done a good thing, getting this former assassin to become a state's witness and bat for the good guys for once. Abe's testimony had already put a bunch of bad men in prison, and there were more he could put away, too. Nick tried to be there for his unlikely friend as much as he could.
He'd told Jen a little here and there about Abe, but she knew without him having to say too much that the friendship was important to him. Turning Abe Reles had been important, and not abandoning the man was important, too. And Nick was looking forward to seeing things come together at today's trial.
The phone rang just as they finished doing the dishes. "I'll get it," Nick said, drying his hands and heading over to the phone on the wall. He picked it up, though he was a little distracted watching the way Jen moved in that tight skirt she was wearing.
"Detective Buchanan, this is NYPD Sergeant Jack Morton."
"Good morning, Sergeant," Nick greeted. "What can I do for you?"
"I'm calling to inform you about Abe Reles."
"He's set to testify today, isn't he?"
"He was, yes. But he fell out of the window of his hotel this morning."
Nick almost dropped the phone. "He what!?"
"I'm sorry to tell you that Mr. Reles died on impact. Some of the detectives guarding Mr. Reles told me you were a visitor and friend to him. I'm sorry for your loss."
Whatever else the sergeant had to say, Nick didn't hear it. He numbly hung up the telephone and stumbled back to the kitchen table.
"What is it?" Jen asked, coming to his side immediately. "What happened?"
"Abe Reles," Nick croaked. "Abe's dead."
"Oh my god, how!?" Jen exclaimed.
Nick told her what the sergeant had told him, that Abe fell out of the window to his death.
"Was he trying to escape? Or did someone get to him and push him?"
"I dunno. Didn't say. Didn't ask."
Jen put her arms around him where they sat at the table and held him close. "Oh Nick, I'm so sorry."
Nick didn't have any words. He just sighed heavily and leaned his head against hers. He just wanted to be close to her now. Hold her and be with her and know that life could be a son of a bitch but at least he had Jennifer.
After a moment, Jen let go of him and stood up. "I know what we should do," she announced.
"What?"
She went to the wall calendar beside the refrigerator and took it down. She looked at it and flipped to the next month. And then she put it on the table in front of Nick. "Here," she said, pointing to a date. "Let's do it then. It's just a couple weeks away. After Thanksgiving but before Chanukah and Christmas."
"Do what?" Nick asked in confusion.
She smiled. "Let's get married."
December 6, 1941
They took the last train out of town on Friday night after they got off of work at the station and stayed up all night in the bar car, drinking and being giddy and excited. Nick teased Jen about how her cheeks got red after a couple whiskeys, and Jen leaned into her goofiness by getting a little handsy in front of the bartender. But damn, it was fun.
Neither of them had ever been to Niagara Falls before, but it was supposed to be romantic and the place to get married in a hurry. The train was going to pull into the station any minute, and they'd get a cab to a hotel and then ask the front desk where they could get married. It was hastily put together, but it was going to be perfect. Nick had been a mess over the death of Abe Reles, and Jen had found that seeing the man she loved be upset like that had put everything in perspective for her. He wasn't in danger but in their work, there was no telling when he might be. They had no idea what was coming for them in life. No idea if they'd get called back undercover. No idea if any gangsters had it out for Nick or the Claybournes and come knocking. No idea if they'd have children. No idea how the NYPD would react to eventually finding out that two of their Homicide detectives were married. No idea about any of it. Jen knew about the here and now. And even that was a little murky sometimes.
Everything was going to change. Jen could feel it in the crisp cold air of the snowy scenery outside the train. And everything was going to be alright. Or maybe it wouldn't. But Jen knew that she and Nick would be together. There wasn't a single doubt in her mind that she belonged with him, with a ring on her finger that Nick promised to buy her, and with his kiss on her lips. And that made all the uncertainty of the future feel like nothing more than the next adventure. Their next adventure.
THE END