Summary: When some magical Gingerbread Men cause some chaos it's up to Erza to save the day.

Pairings: Kinana/Levy friendship, some implied Gajeel/Levy (if you squint), and one-sided Erza/Baked Goods.

YouTube Prompt: Crack video for Natsu to the song 'The Trammps' By Disco Inferno. Why? Because their chorus lyrics are 'burn, baby, burn'.

For Christmas, Kinana cooked Gingerbread Men. It was her first real Fairy Tail Christmas (the last seven didn't count seeing as they were convinced majority of the guild had been killed) and she was determined to make it the best Christmas ever. And who doesn't like Gingerbread Men at Christmas Time? It goes beautifully with the hot chocolate, and this year she made everyone personal Gingerbread Men, icing each and every one to look like a member of the guild.

"Oh my word!" Mirajane gasped as she carefully picked hers up. Kinana had chosen to make Gingerbread Mira in her Satan Soul costume. More for the challenge than anything else. Kinana enjoyed a good challenge like any other Fairy Tail mage. "Did you make these all by yourself?"

Kinana hummed an affirmative as she blushed and nodded.

"They're amazing, Kinana-Chan," Levy admired the Gajeel and Lily shaped biscuits. The two stoic members of the guild had not come to take theirs yet, having preferred to sit in the corner and watch everyone else instead. "How did you make them?"

"Oh, erm, I just followed a recipe."

"Well, I for one think these are superb," Erza said as she lifted her Gingerbread self to her lips, ready to eat, "and I can't wait to taste them."

"HA!"

Everyone jumped back in shock as the Gingerbread Man (well woman) in Erza's hand came to life as did all the other Gingerbread Men.

"Gihihi," Gingerbread Gajeel snickered as he leaped off the baking tray, "can't catch me, Shrimp!"

"WHAT EVEN THE BISCUIT IS CALLING ME THAT?!"

"Oh no!" Kinana gasped as Mirajane's biscuit attempted to kill the eldest takeover mage, and everyone else's was beginning to run all over the guild building. "I don't know how this could have happened!"

"Can't catch me!" the biscuits all shouted in unison. "Can't catch me because I'm the Gingerbread Man!"

"You must have followed a magical recipe!" Levy shouted as she flipped through a book that had the explanation somewhere in it (as most of her books conveniently did). "There's a special Gingerbread one that allows the biscuits to come alive and retain a rather annoying personalities."

"Can't catch me! Can't catch me!" the biscuits chanted. "Can't catch me! Can't catch me!"

"Oh?" Erza said in a very deadly tone of voice. The one that usually made Natsu and Gray run for the hills (speaking of which they were fighting over who got to jump out of the window and escape Erza's wrath first). "Wanna bet?"

"EEK!"

Kinana and Levy clutched one another as Erza snatched up the Gingerbread Mirajane and immediately tore her head off with her teeth. "I'll try not to take that as a threat to my own person," Mira said cheerfully. Erza then gobbled the rest of the Gingerbread Mirajane with great gusto leaving only crumbs round her mouth.

"Mm," Erza groaned delightedly, "That's was delicious Kinana. I commend your cooking skills. Now then," her eyes shined like evil, gold, demon eyes, "for the rest of these biscuits."

Everyone watched in horror as Erza pounced on each and every biscuit person in the guild, grabbing them with her hands, and ferociously biting their heads off. She looked like a lion gone mad as she began to pounce on the biscuits on all fours and eating four biscuits at a time, their legs still kicking the bottom of her chin as she shoved them in her mouth without thought.

"My God…" Max shuddered as he watched his biscuit self perish. "It's a massacre!"

Everyone privately agreed has Erza eventually devoured them all. Her hunt for the Gingerbread Men ended on a terrifying note as she found Gingerbread Wendy trembling under a table and had no mercy for the poor, frightened, biscuit. The human Wendy was certainly going to have nightmares about this in the future.

"Ah," Erza gasped as she drained a glass of milk to wash everyone down, "that was delicious Kinana. I thoroughly enjoyed that. Is there anymore?"

"N-no," Kinana stuttered, "you ate the last one."

"What?" Erza suddenly turned really cold and everyone took a huge step backwards. "What do you mean that was the last one?! I need more Damnit! More I tell you!"

Kinana watched, horrified as Erza went completely demented in her determination to eat more baked goods. Her hair suddenly covered in crumbs, her eyes wild, her hands turned rather claw-like, as she destroyed everything in her wake to find another biscuit or cake.

Christmas was unfortunately spent hunting the madwoman down, tying her up, and leaving her in the care of Porlyusica in order to cure her from her sugar rush…and the future withdrawal symptoms. However Porlyusica did not care for having her Christmas interrupted, and therefore they all ended up cursed with boils….and cuts from Erza's swords.

So much for the best Christmas ever.