"Hello, Dean."
Dean turns around from the sandwich he's making. Cas is standing at the entrance of the kitchen. Dean's heart skips a beat, and he walks over. Dean missed him. Dean knows it was all a terrible djinn dream, but it had all felt so real. And then Dean hadn't seen Cas since. It's been over a week. Dean knows it's stupid, but the longer he didn't see Cas, the more worried Dean got that the dream was true. Stupid, but he felt that way.
"Sam told me about the djinn," Cas continues.
"He did, huh?" Dean's in front of him now and quickly hugs him.
Or it's supposed to be a quick hug. As soon as Dean wraps his arms around Cas, he feels so much better. He holds onto him.
Cas is real. He's alive. He's here.
That's when Dean realizes he's closed his eyes. Cas hugs Dean back, and Dean feels all the tension in his shoulders leave. Dean can't let go. Not yet.
What if Cas really does die one day? What if he leaves for good?
Dean holds him tighter. Dean never wants Cas to leave again. Cas always leaves days at a time, and Dean fucking hates it. Especially after that dream. Dean doesn't want Cas to leave his sight. It's overprotective and clingy, but all the feelings Dean thought he left behind in the dream are resurfacing.
"Dean, are you alright?" Cas asks, and Dean feels Cas trying to pull away.
"I'm fine," Dean responds, holding onto Cas even tighter. Cas lets him and hugs Dean again.
"You're trembling," he says.
Dean swallows dryly. "I just need to hold onto you a while." It's soft and pathetic.
"Okay."
Dean doesn't even know how long they stand like that. Dean focuses on Cas' presence. He is really here. He's not dead. Or gone. Or anything like that. It feels so nice to be wrapped up in his embrace. God, Dean sounds like a teenage girl after watching Twilight.
Dean takes a deep breath to try and get a hold of himself. "It felt like you died," he finally says quietly. "Again."
Cas rubs his back. It's surprisingly very soothing. "I'm here, Dean."
Dean pulls back just far enough to look at him. Cas' blue eyes are filled with concern. Dean missed him so much. "I know," Dean tells him.
Then Dean realizes how awkward this is. His hands are on Cas' shoulders while Cas' rest on Dean's lower back. They're not even a foot apart, staring into each other's eyes. Dean tenses at this realization.
Cas gives Dean a soft smile before leaning in and planting a soft kiss on Dean's cheek. "I'm not going to die, Dean. Not if I can help it."
Dean's heart is pounding, and his mouth is impossibly dry. Oh, how Dean wants that statement to be true, but he can't believe it. Not with his luck. Dean also wants Cas to kiss him again and never stop. Dean doesn't know what he's feeling. He's relieved Cas is here, but now he's scared he's going to lose him for real. Dean wants to keep hugging him, but he knows it would be weird if they hugged again. He just wants… He wants… He wants more.
"I'll let you finish eating," Cas says and slowly slips out of Dean's grasp. He smiles at Dean again before turning and leaving.
Dean watches him walk away and feels even worse than before.