Summary: Inspired by the new side story from Black Butler. A childhood lie from Master has some consequences twenty years later….

Pairings: Parental Master/Natsu, implied brotherly Laxus/Erza, Erza/Cake, Natsu/Lisanna friendship, Gray/Natsu friendship, some Lucy/Natsu, parental Lucy/Nashi, and Natsu/Blackmailing Laxus.

YouTube Prompt: A crack video to 'Cell Block Tango' from the Chicago Musical….because it would be awesome to have say Erza, Mirajane, Levy, Juvia, Lucy, and some of the other girls sing about murdering the boys.

When Natsu was twelve he lost his very last baby tooth.

He lost it in a very typical Fairy Tail manner, he pissed Laxus off enough and he punched it out of Natsu's mouth. "You know what that means, right?!" Lisanna cried out excitedly. "The tooth fairy will come!"

"The what fairy?!"

"The tooth fairy," Gray repeated, "Jeeze what are you, deaf as well as dumb?"

"What was that?!"

"Natsu, Gray," Erza said warningly. Gray and Natsu instantly stiffened before they hugged each other pretended they were the best of friends. "The tooth fairy is a kind and charitable guardian of Fairy Tail," Erza said ignorant of Gray and Natsu's deception. "Whenever you lose a tooth you have to put it under your pillow, and the tooth fairy blesses you with a coin. I used all of mine to buy more cake!"

"And instantly lost another tooth with all the cavities," Laxus scoffed, "idiot."

Fortunately Erza didn't hear him or there would have been a devastating battle that might have ended the world. "How come the tooth fairy never visited me before?!" Natsu demanded to know.

"Well," Lisanna said thoughtfully, "you did live with a dragon, maybe he scared the tooth fairy off?"

"Igneel is awesome like that."

"Unlike you," Gray muttered.

"WHAT WAS THAT?!"

And, so, of course, the day ended with another brawl, and Natsu went home with having gained a black eye to replace his missing tooth. As instructed, he put his tooth under his pillow, and went straight to sleep.

Until he heard a loud thump.

He shot up in time to find Master, wearing a tutu and fairy wings, rubbing his bottom. "Would it kill you brats to learn to clean your rooms?!" Master barked.

"Gramps!" Natsu cried out. "Why are you wearing that?! And what are you doing here?!"

"I'm the tooth fairy, obviously," Master said rolling his eyes, "all Masters of Fairy Tail take on the role of the tooth fairy." Okay this is a blatant lie. He did it for his son, and then did it for Laxus, and when his guild suddenly filled itself with sad little orphans he felt the need to do it for them as well. After all they hardly get any real childhood moments these days. "And this is my uniform."

(Another lie. He lost a bet with Gildarts but there was no way he was telling that to Natsu.)

"Oh I see!" Natsu crowed. "So I get a nice big gold coin, right?"

"Well, I don't know," Master sniffed, "only good boys, who are asleep when the tooth fairy visits, get one of those."

"I'm sleeping!"

And at that Natsu threw himself back down into his hammock, pulled his blanket up, and began to fake snoring.

Master couldn't help but smile softly at that. He took Natsu's tooth, replaced it with a coin, and patted Natsu on the head.

"Goodnight….my shitty little brat."

FTTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFT

Twenty years later Lucy was tip-toeing towards her daughter's bedroom. She couldn't believe her baby was old enough to lose her first tooth! It seemed just like yesterday she was teething. Blimey, Lucy felt old. Though she really did wish the momentous occasion happened normally….Nashi lost her first tooth in another brawl between her and Ur Fullbuster….honestly that child was definitely half Natsu's.

Carefully, she opened the bedroom door, and almost lost all her sneakiness and composure at the sight of Natsu crouched at the foot of the bed, with his scarf wrapped round his face like a ninja mask, and a camera at the ready.

"Natsu!" she hissed as she clutched her chest. She almost had a heart attack. "What on earth are you doing?!"

"Waiting," Natsu grinned evilly beneath his scarf, "any minute now Laxus is going to enter this room in a tutu and wings, and I'll take the photo to forever hold as blackmail material."

"I….don't even want to know."

Lucy had long given up trying to understand some of Fairy Tail's insanity, especially Dragon Slayer members of Fairy Tail insanity, she swears they have their own bran, and decided right then and there to just leave Natsu to it.

She quickly but gently swapped the tooth for a coin before she brushed her baby's hair out of her face and kissed her forehead. "Mummy loves you," she whispered though she knew her child was far too sound asleep to hear her. She didn't bother asking Natsu if he was coming, he was too absorbed in his blackmailing plans, instead she just kissed his forehead between his hair and the scarf, "Love you," she murmured fondly.

"Uhuh," Natsu muttered, "I love you too blackmailing photo of Laxus in a tutu."

Lucy's eye twitched and she doesn't care what Natsu says later, he totally deserved that kick in the gut….and the disappointment that Laxus never turned up in a tutu and fairy wings.