Summary: Nashi's parents are so embarrassing and corny, even if they are also badass and heroic.

Pairings: Natsu/Lucy, parental Lucy/Nashi, and parental Natsu/Nashi.

YouTube Prompt: A really corny, cheesy, crack video to 'We Are Family'. You know that seventies disco one XD

It started off as a normal mission.

It always does, Nashi realises bitterly. Especially the more terrifying of her parents' stories, they always start with a normal mission that goes out of hand. Nashi and her friends were doing a simple job and then bam! They ended up in the middle of some sort of secret conspiracy that involved a very scary looking castle and Nashi being kidnapped.

(She doesn't care what fucking Fullbuster says she is not a danger magnet and he's just as bad!)

Nashi had no clue what to do and almost gave up to her enemies when her mother suddenly appeared out of nowhere and kicked one of the hairiest, ugliest, of thugs in the face so hard he flew into a wall.

She had, apparently, sent one of her spirits to follow Nashi (and trust her they will be having words about that later, Nashi was twelve now, she could do her own missions!), and used the spirit world to come in the nick of time to rescue everyone.

The battle was fearsome and Nashi had to admit she did more standing around and watching with her jaw to the floor than actually fighting. She couldn't help it! It's her Mum, sure Dad was always badass, but her Mum?! Not unless Dad burnt something down again.

It was then when a blast of magic caught Nashi by surprise and she found herself flung out of the window.

It was a sort of slow, motion, thing, as if time itself slowed to a halt. Nashi remembered the look of horror on her mother's face, the feeling of her arm lifting up as if to reach out to her Mum, and then slowly, her mother began to run towards her – and that was when time went back to full speed, and Nashi found herself hurtling towards the ground.

And then something sparkled, and she looked up to see her mother fucking sky diving towards her, her arms reached out, and before Nashi knew it she was squashed against her mother's breasts, the smell of her perfume and the stars itself overwhelmed her nose, and the warm safe feeling of her Mum's arms didn't do anything to stop the urge to pee herself as she screamed to her death.

"We're going to die!" she sobbed hysterically into her mother's breasts. "We're so going to die!"

Her mother patted her head gently. "No, we're not," she said so confidently that Nashi had almost forgotten they were hurtling through the sky straight towards the very hard, stone, ground, she looked up and blinked, her eyes widened as she saw a strange mysterious smile on her mother's face. "As if he'd let us fall."

Before Nashi could even think about asking what her mother was on about, something slammed into her back, and it was burning hot. She could see at the odd angle, a very familiar, tanned and calloused, hand grab hold of her mother's head, threading its fingers into her gold hair, and pulling her close.

Nashi found herself sandwiched between the softness of her mother and the hard muscled body of her father, and before it could get any more uncomfortable or awkward –

BAM!

Her father had managed to direct them into a stone wall, shouldering the fall himself, and shielding both Nashi and her mother from the raining bricks. Nash flushed, humiliated, as she realised she was sitting in her father's lap, and her mother was straddling her.

To make things worse her mother's breasts were most definitely suffocating her to death.

"Why is it," her father spoke up, he sounded rather cross but amused as well, "I always have to catch you from falling off tall things?"

"Well," her mother said with a playful, flirty, tone….urgh, "perhaps it's because punctuality was never your strength. If you were early for once perhaps you could prevent the falling."

"Lucy," her father growled.

"Natsu," her mother mimicked.

And that's when they decided to kiss over Nashi's head. Urgh! Why was there never a sick bucket when she needed one? "Oi!" she bellowed. "I'm still here! Can't you wait like normal parents?!"

Her parents pulled away quickly and blushed, like teenagers. Ew. Her Dad then laughed, scratched the back of his head, and then ruffled Nashi's hair. "Sorry Nashi," he grinned, "We'll wait till you're asleep-"

"Natsu!" her Mum shrieked.

"But you," he continued ignoring her mother (either he was very brave or very stupid, having observed her parents these last, long, twelve years, she would say it was the latter one), "got to promise to stop copying Mummy's worst and weirdest habits. Do something healthier, like beat the crap out of that Fullbuster kid."

"Natsu! Stop encouraging her fights with Gray's son!" Her mother hissed furiously. "And what do you mean my worst and weirdest habits?! All her bad behaviour is your fault!"

"I've never once jumped off a fucking tower!"

"No but you've burned a lot of them down!" she then punched her father hard in the face. "And what have I told you about swearing in front of Nash?!"

This, of course, went on the entire journey home, and did she mention it was a three day walk? It was hell, Nashi nearly died of humiliation.

Parents!