Summary: Gray and Cancer can no longer look at one another in the eye, and to be honest Lucy will probably never be able to look at Juvia in the eye….

Pairings: Gray/Lucy friendship, Lucy/Cancer friendship, implied Gray/Cancer, Gray/Juvia, Juvia/Lucy friendship, implied Natsu/Lucy, and mentions of Loke/Gray/Cancer (all so totally in Juvia's head).

YouTube Prompt: Crack video to the Cancer/Gray dance off to 'Night Fever' by the Bee Gees

It was one of those very rare times where Gray and Lucy went on a mission by themselves. Erza was away on some sort of super-secret S-Class mission, Wendy and Charle were on their own job, and Natsu and Happy were being forced to do community service for destroying the town hall recently.

So that left Lucy and Gray by themselves as they tried to tackle a man-eating plant. Gray's ice managed to stop it for a while but the evil damn thing managed to wrestle free some vines and tangled itself round Gray and Lucy throwing them upside down.

Lucy desperately tried to get free before Gray noticed that her skirt had fallen to her stomach revealing her knickers to the world. "Damnit!" she cursed as she tried to reach for her keys. "Need to cut these stupid things to pieces."

"Erm Lucy," Gray mumbled looking incredibly embarrassed, "Your skirt is-"

"DON'T LOOK!" Lucy screamed furiously. "Aha!" she immediately brightened which befuddled Gray. Lucy managed to pull her key out without dropping the others (because trust her Aquarius would murder her if she dropped her again) and without pulling her arm out of its socket. "Open the gate of the crab," Lucy shouted the incant "Cancer!"

Lucy grinned as she heard the usual ding-dong of her magic working and Cancer appeared muttering his name over and over again. "What can I do for you, ebi?" Cancer asked.

"Cut us loose and then hack this evil plant to pieces!"

"As you wish," Cancer said in his usual cool manner, "ebi."

And before Lucy knew it she was on the ground again nursing a bruised backside while the plant that had been trying to strangle her upside down was now in shreds. She was just about to thank Cancer for his work when she suddenly realised Cancer and Gray were awkwardly trying not to look at one another. Gray's cheeks were a faint pink while Cancer was….well, she didn't know it was possible to see a blush on red skin until now.

"I suddenly find myself late for a previous engagement I forgot!" Gray blurted out suddenly. "Goodbye!" and with that he disappeared so quickly he literally left dust.

Lucy looked at Cancer who seemed to have blushed even more brightly than before. "What on earth happened between you guys?" she asked in wonder.

"It's best you don't know ebi."

Lucy sweat-dropped at that and decided that she really didn't want to know.

After some embarrassed pleasantries, Cancer disappeared back to the spirit world and Lucy started to make her way back to get her reward money when she was suddenly ambushed by the most terrifying creature in the world.

"Love Rival!" Juvia growled as she clutched the lapels of Lucy's waistcoat. A dark, evil, aura seeped out of her that rivalled Erza's at her angriest and the look on her face was fucking terrifying. Lucy couldn't help the strangled scream that escaped her lips. "What is this I have heard about you summoning my other Love Rival Cancer-san near my beloved Gray-sama?!"

"Erm," Lucy sweat-dropped. "I just summoned him for a job….." she trailed off as she attempted to pry Juvia's fingers off of her jacket with a misfortunate lack of success. As she struggled to get Juvia to let go a thought occurred to her. "Juvia," she said a little hesitatingly, "how did you get here so quickly?"

"Ah," Juvia finally let Lucy go and clutched her pink cheeks with embarrassment, "Juvia is embarrassed to admit this but since Love Rival and Gray-sama were going on a job without Natsu-san or Happy-san, or Wendy-san, or Erza-san, or even Charle-san, Juvia thought it was best to make sure that Love Rival didn't take advantage of Gray-sama's beautiful vulnerable and very naked body."

"Hell no!" Lucy retorted.

She loved Gray and everything but only as a friend. And while she, like any other healthy straight girl, can admit Gray had a good-looking body, he really wasn't her type. Her type was more the rough, tanned, and fiery – oh she was not going there!

Especially when Juvia was glowering at her. "Perhaps Love Rival doesn't want Gray-sama," Juvia conceded barely, "But Love Rival summoned another Love Rival! Don't think Juvia doesn't know! Gray-sama told Juvia all about the hip grinding and the holding hands Cancer-san did to him! Juvia had to console her Gray-sama night after night he suffered so many nightmares from all the dancing Cancer-san forced him into! And Love Rival dares summon that evil, disco-dancing, Love Rival near my poor beloved Gray-sama!" Juvia seemed to nearly swoon at that. "Were you hoping to create a deep and meaningful boy love between your spirit and my Gray-sama because if you can't have them then no girl can?!"

Hip – what?!

Hand – what?!

WHAT?!

Lucy couldn't believe a single thing she was hearing. Okay, that was a slight lie, she had always thought Cancer was gay, but she didn't think he would be interested in Gray of all people, and what was this about hip grinding?!

There was only one answer to all of this.

"Loke!" she hissed to Leo Key. "What sort of bad influence have you been inflicting on Cancer?!"

"Ah!" Juvia screamed. "Loke is in on the boy love orgy that my poor Gray-sama has been dragged into!"

Lucy sweat-dropped heavily at that.

She should have just helped Natsu with community service instead, it would have been less traumatising.