Summary: Macao and Wakaba try to capture the Pied Piper….they fail.

Pairings: Macao/Wakaba friendship and lots of family feels.

YouTube Prompt: Juvia/Gray tribute to 'You Belong with Me' by Taylor Swift.

"Are you sure this is a good idea?"

It was a late night, and Wakaba and Macao were having one last drink by the camp fire as they kept watch over the children. Wakaba was happily puffing away on his cigarettes while Macao was fretting…..again.

"Course it's a good idea," Wakaba scoffed. "This Pied Piper bloke kidnaps kids, right? So what's better bait than our own kids?"

Sound asleep around them was all the children of Fairy Tail. The three Strauss siblings were curled against a tree in their own group, Mira sitting up in her sleep, with Elfman's head on her shoulder, and Lisanna's on her lap, while Natsu sprawled wildly on the floor with Erza sandwiched between him and Gray, attempting to keep them from fighting even in her sleep, and Laxus stoically slept alone until Levy, of all people, rolled over and curled up against him like a little kitten, and finally, but never last, Cana snuggled deeply into her sleeping bag.

"It's just….Master would kill us if we let anything happen to them."

"Master will never know," Wakaba said sternly, "As far as he's aware, we're taking the kids on a camping trip to release some pent up energy, and we'll just happen to come across the kidnapper on our way home, make a swift capture, and get lots of reward money."

"He didn't find it suspicious at all that we wanted to spend time with the kids?"

As much as Macao and Wakaba loved them, they tried to avoid spending too much time with the kids. Too much time usually resulted in your eyebrows being burnt off, your fingers getting frozen, the occasional electrocution, being attacked by swords, and most definitely pranked…so not worth the hassle.

"Ha!" Wakaba barked. "He was so pleased about getting the night off that he didn't question it. In fact I saw him go through his phone book to start up a party."

"…..what a lovely role model we all have," Macao sweat-dropped.

"Eh," Wakaba shrugged. "Who cares? Just relax, wait for the kids to start following this mystical music player, and then BAM! We'll get our guy and reward money, like that!" he snapped his fingers.

Coincidentally, as if the Pied Piper heard them, the eerie music that had bene reported started up, and slowly, blearily, the children started to get up.

Macao and Wakaba stared in disbelieve as their violent, noisy, disruptive, chaotic, disorderly, children moved into a straight line and walked, single file, without any problems. Natsu and Gray didn't even start a brawl when they accidentally bumped into one another!

It was such a shock that it took them ten minutes to realise the children were being kidnapped…..

"Crap!" Macao cursed. "Quickly! Before we lose them!"

They fumbled a bit and had an unfortunate experience of tripping over a couple sleeping bags. By the time they really started moving the children were already in the forest.

"Fuck!" Wakaba swore. "How fast can these kids move?!"

"Why are you surprised?!" Macao yelped. "You've seen them when there's free sweets about."

They ran as quickly as they could (with Natsu's blanket still wrapped round their ankles) but it was too late, a mist had appeared, and the children had disappeared…..

"Oh….my…..fucking….God…." Macao said slowly. "Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit!" he dragged out as his breathing began to accelerate.

"Now Macao," Wakaba said warily, "Don't panic, it's not too bad, we can fix it!"

"Not too bad? Not too bad?!" Macao said shrilly. "The children have been kidnapped! How can we fucking fix it?!"

"Dude, calm down," Wakaba puffed anxiously on his cigarette, "we'll think of something."

"Us thinking is what got us in this mess to begin with!" Macao screamed. "Master is going to murder us when we tell him we lost his grandson and the others! And let's not forget what Gildarts will do!"

Gildarts wasn't around much but when he was, he fucking adored the children. He doted on all the girls and mentored all the boys, Natsu was the obvious favourite, but they were all special in his eyes, and if a single hair on any of them was damaged, hell was the price.

"Shit!" Wakaba dropped the cigarette. "He's going to tear us to pieces!"

"I'm too young to die!"

"I don't want to leave my wife as a widower!"

"We're doomed!"

And at that they, pathetically, clung to one another as they wept and wailed for a solid good hour. Images of what Master and Gildarts would do to them when they came home without the children haunted them.

Then they heard a cracking noise, like a twig breaking, and suddenly, a rat-faced man in a ragged cloak appeared, breathless and terrified.

"I've changed my mind!" he screeched. "They're not children, they're demons! Here!" he suddenly shoved Levy forward, Wakaba caught her swiftly before she fell onto the floor. "Take them back! Take them all back! I'm handing myself in!"

It was then that Macao and Wakaba realised this was the Pied Piper, and instead of being the greatest evil on the world, he was a terrified, wimpy, man, with singed eyebrows, ice hanging in his hair, which was standing on end as if he had been electrocuted, scratch marks from a sword, and a vague sense that he had been mauled by animals, demons, and beasts…..

The children appeared behind him, all wide-eyed and innocent…

Ha! How deceptive of them.

"Thank God!" Macao cried out as he hugged all the children. A lot of them squirmed in his hold, disgusted and freaked out, while the others stood there bewildered. Erza hugged back which caused Macao to break a rib or two as she held on far too tightly. "I thought you were gone forever!" he croaked from the pain.

Laxus glowered at him. "You set this up," he accused accurately, "you used us as bait."

"Err…."

"How could you?!"

Wakaba and Macao jumped at the children shouting in unison. They suddenly (though not unexpectedly) looked like the demons the Pied Piper thought they were. "Now, now," Wakaba said uneasily, "it wasn't like that. This was just a…..unexpected addition to our camping holiday. A little adventure."

"A fun little adventure," Macao jumped in, "after all, you enjoyed beating that bad guy up, didn't you?"

The children all looked a little sheepish.

"See!" Wakaba said smugly. "You had fun. No harm happened. Now if we just keep it between ourselves and don't tell your Gramps…." He trailed off suggestively, and the children all swapped very talkative but silent looks.

And then their innocent, indignant, faces turned into evil, demonic, smirks.

"What," Laxus spoke for the group, "would you be willing to do in order to ensure our silence?"

…..If Master thought it was weird that Wakaba and Macao came home from their camping trip dressed in drag while the children were thoroughly enjoying their sweets…well he didn't say a single thing.

(He knew his brats too well, of course something like this was bound to happen.)