I turn my gaze towards Christian, who never stops looking at me, and as he does so, he begins to move inside her. And I don't know why, I know what that gaze fixed on mine means. I know what he's thinking about. He's thinking that it's me. Because that's exactly what he wants. He wants to possess me in front of everyone and prove that I'm his and no one else's.

Shit!

I contain another moan. I'm excited, very excited. I look down at my chest and I see my nipples marking against my dress. I cross my arms over my breasts. I look away from the bed scene briefly and look away. Then I watch the other two couples leave the room.

A snarl escapes from Christian which causes my attention to turn to him. And I see him clutching his hands, tighter, to the woman's bottom. Each lunge from him makes her move forward and in each movement Noah's limb disappears into her mouth.

I feel the moisture running down my legs. Right now I wish I was wearing panties. I squeeze my legs as I feel my sex throbbing with desire.

I know what I want. Above all I wish to know myself. But I also want him. To Christian. And I don't know which one will win the final battle. Whether the desire for knowledge or the desire for pleasure

—I'm close! —exclaims Noah as he clings with his hands tighter to the woman's shoulders and head.

—Just a little longer! —says Christian now as he continues to move inside the woman now faster.

By God! It's just as I imagined it. He's fucking her hard, with intensity. Rough. Just like he told me he was. And I don't know why the excitement grows even more inside me. My walls squeeze and contract delightfully.

Christian lets out a groan and I do the same.

As I continue to watch the erotic scene in front of me, my excitement and pleasure grows. I try to contain the moaning that begins to escape my lips every time I feel Christian moan, but I can't. My body has decided to take control of the situation. I can't hold it in any longer. I feel my walls tighten and begin to relax while I let out a deafening groan. The orgasm comes to me like a tsunami that sweeps away everything in its path.

—Open up! —says Christian in the midst of a groan.

And I know it's not the woman he's talking to. It's with me, he wants me to open my legs. He wants to know if I'm wet. God! I never thought this was so erotic.

I look into his eyes. His look challenging me to do it. I am not aware of what my body is doing. Not when he looks at me like that. And I open my legs to let him see my sex. I watch him slide his tongue across his lips before he bites his lower lip. And my hands move as if they had a life of their own. I lean forward without taking my eyes off him, and I slide my hands down all my legs, from my ankles, slowly until they reach the inner thighs.

—Touch yourself to me! —he says in a demanding tone with a lustful look.

I am no longer aware of what I am doing. It is as if I have been bewitched. I close my eyes and slide a finger across my swollen, wet sex while letting out another moan.

—Look at me. —he asks me and I obey.

The intensity of the moaning increases. All three moan loudly, strongly. I can't tell who belongs to whom. I stay looking at Christian's face, decomposing with pleasure as he reaches orgasm with a few more moves. Christian comes out of the woman, takes off his condom, ties it up and throws it in a trash can. Then he stares at me.

I close my legs, aware of what I've just done, and I feel my cheeks turn red again.

Oh, my God! I just touched myself in front of someone else. I've never done that in my life, and I just did it in front of two men. Although I don't think anyone but Christian noticed.

Noah gets out of bed, pulls the woman towards him and carries her on his shoulder.

—I guess you're not going to continue tonight, so I'll continue. —he says as he leaves the room through a side door.

Christian turns around and heads for the shower in the room. I look around. We are left alone.

What am I supposed to do?

I could use a shower right now. But what if someone else comes in.

I look at Christian in the warm glass shower, which is beginning to steam up from the hot water. And I don't think about it again. I get up from the couch and walk over. I stop in front of the door, take off my dress and open it. Christian turns abruptly to the door, frowning.

—Can I come with you? —I ask him while he, seeing that it is me, relaxes again.

—Go ahead. —he invites me in.

I take one of the sponges, pour gel on it and start washing between my legs.

—Ana. —he says to me suddenly.

I look up and watch him as the water falls on us.

—If you want to know yourself, you will need several lessons.

—Lessons?

—Yes, lessons that will teach you to know yourself. Although I think this is a bad idea.

—I'm sorry? What!

—Nothing. What did you learn today? —he asks suddenly.

I'm not ready for his question and I need a few seconds to think about it. I think about what just happened. Nothing like this has ever happened to me before.

—That I can reach orgasm without you touching me. —I say to him as I watch him raise an eyebrow impressed.

I feel my cheeks burning with the memories of what just happened a few minutes ago.

—Are you blushing? —he asks as he slides a hand across my cheek. —Are you ashamed of what you just did?

—I don't know. I don't know what I feel. Sex is supposed to be a private thing between two people. You're not supposed to see a third person when you're intimate. That I'm not supposed to feel what I felt while I was seeing them.

—Sex is to be enjoyed without prejudice, Ana. It doesn't matter if it's between two, three or four people. Or if someone is watching you. What matters is that you enjoy it.

—But that's not normal, is it?

—What do you consider normal?

—Sex between two people in private. —I answer him as I step away, taking the heat from his hand off my face.

—Yes, many people consider that normal, but others consider that sex, as long as it is consensual, you can have it with whoever you want, wherever you want, however you want. —he says to me with a smile as he runs his hands through his hair. —Sex between two people can be intense and intimate, but I think it should only be so when both people want it.

—Do you want it? —I ask suddenly.

I have no idea why I asked. And I regret that I did. He stops smiling. He stares at me and takes one step in my direction while I take another.

—Did you enjoy it, Ana? —he answers with another question as he continues to move forward. —Did you enjoy seeing me buried deep inside that woman? —I think I'm starting to hyperventilate.

I crash into the cold glass of the shower and he stops in front of me, cornering me with his imposing stature and impressive physique. His muscles are more defined by physical effort. His whole body is completely wet from the shower. I feel my legs shaking as he stares at me.

—Were you excited to see me fuck her exactly the way you want me to? —I knew it. He had done it on purpose. —Were you excited to hear me moan?

I can't talk.

I can't deny it. My body can't deny it. I enjoyed it. I enjoyed every damn second. Each onslaught, every groan. His intense gaze on me. But I won't admit it. I'm not going to give him the satisfaction. If I do he will know the power he has over my body and what he does to me with just one look.

He brings his hands closer and places them on either side of my face, against the wall. Making a cage with his body and his hands. Preventing me from running away.

—Answer me, Ana. —he says, sticking to me.

—I'm getting excited right now. —I boldly confess without being able to avoid it and raise my hands to his chest.

I slide my fingers slowly, brushing against the thin layer of hair that covers his chest. I feel the tingle at my fingertips as I slide my hands across it.

Christian stares at me. He tilts his pelvis slightly towards me, making me moan once more when he presses his hard erection against my body desiring it. His hard member presses against my entrance while my whole body tenses in delightful anticipation. And I can't think of anything else but him, inside me, moving deliciously. Possessing me with the same intensity as he possessed her.

He leans his face towards mine and rubs his nose with mine making me close my eyes waiting for the contact of his lips on mine. Which never comes. I open my eyes. He has his closed. I don't understand why he does this. Why he holds himself back when he's with me. Why he can't let himself be carried away by the moment.

—Christian! —only then does he open them. —Is something wrong?

—I don't understand you, Ana. Is that really what you want? Do you still want to know yourself? —he says to me in a defeated tone.

—Yes, but I want you too. —I say to him in a gasp as I press more against him.

—I want to understand you, Ana, I really do. A few hours ago you wanted to know yourself and you didn't want any relationship, and now you want to sleep with me.

—I want to know myself, but I also want you. Is it so difficult to understand? —I tell him as I raise my hands to cradle his face. —Can't I have both?

—What exactly do you want? To fuck me and also to fuck others. —he says as I open my eyes wider and drop my hands.

—I don't understand what you mean by fucking others. I told you I haven't had sex in a long time.

And it's not like I'm interested in doing it with anyone else but him. He's the only man that's been occupying my mind lately.

—Because you'll need to do it to know yourself. —I still don't understand what you mean.

He separates himself from me. I can see that he is upset as he clenches his jaws. I don't understand why he is upset. I haven't slept with anyone for a long time. And he just did it with a stranger in front of me. And he pretends that I'm doing it with other men too, to get to know myself. I don't think this is part of what I want.

—Do you want me to do as you just did? —I reproach him.

Because I don't think I can sleep with another man, who I imagine I don't know, just to know myself. I couldn't do it even blindfolded, pretending to be him.

Christian looks at me furiously and doesn't seem to understand what I'm talking about.

—Didn't you just do the same thing you're trying to get me to do? Didn't you just fuck her imagining that it's me? —I let go of him quickly without even thinking about what I'm saying.

—Don't compare me Ana, I want something with you. If you wanted the same thing, we wouldn't be in this situation. I can guarantee that if you were mine, I wouldn't share you with anyone. Besides, I already told you that I didn't know they would be here. —he says to me in anger.

—Well, I feel sorry for you. You were the one who offered to help me, remember? Are you regretting it now?

—I promised I'd help you, but that's all. This was the first time you came in here and it will be the last time you do it with me. —he says, separating himself from me and closing the shower.

—What do you mean?

—I'm not going to watch you have sex with another person, Ana, if you want to continue with this, fine. But it won't be while I'm around. —he says as he closes the shower, grabs a towel and leaves the bathroom.

I'm staring at his distorted silhouette as he picks up his jeans from the floor and then disappears towards the door.

What just happened?