Summary: Erza's final session of her first court mandated therapy sessions do not end as they are supposed to….

Pairings: Erza/Cake and some Laxus/Erza friendship with some implied general family feels.

Author's Note: Thank you all so much for giving me over SIXTY FIVE HUNDRED REVIEWS!

Erza happily went into what would be her final session of court mandated therapy.

Seriously, you have one freak out and try to beat the guy who looks exactly like your traitorous ex-best friend to death, and the Magical Council thinks you're unstable and in need of mental help, and you suddenly find yourself in bi-weekly therapy sessions.

They had been difficult and annoying an interfering, after all how was she to make her rent money if she couldn't take jobs that were too long or too far away as she had a session the next day?

It was ridiculous.

And the therapist was a moron who stated the obvious.

So she was cross because she had seen her parents murdered and had been kidnapped? Obviously. So she was angry with herself because had left all her friends behind in Jellal's hands? Duh. So she was heart-broken –

She ended up with a warning from Master after she snapped a few sessions in and chucked a tea cup at her therapist's head.

That was when her anger management therapy had been suggested and as she was unable to bake without causing problems (for some reason Mira has issues with Erza using the kitchen in the guild), made Reedus look seriously ill in her art class with him, could not afford a music teacher, Erza was left with sewing or knitting for her 'creative release' and chose knitting since the needles looked bigger and more deadly than the tiny sewing ones.

She had found it very relaxing (when Natsu and Gray weren't fighting around her) and soon enough she sped through her sessions and seemed to have pleased her therapist.

"Ah, Erza," her therapist smiled hesitatingly, "you look happy."

"I am!" Erza grinned. "It's our last session and I have finished my jumper! Look!" she held up the pale blue jumper that she had spent months on perfecting. "Isn't it pretty?"

"….Yes," her therapist's smile suddenly became strained, "but what are those rusty brown-ish stains?"

"Oh," Erza shrugged, "I had forgotten to wash my needles after I had stabbed Natsu and Gray."

"You stabbed Natsu and Gray?!" her therapist squeaked. "Why?!"

"They were being annoying," Erza explained, "they wouldn't stop fighting and it was bugging everyone, and then-"

"Erza," her therapist interrupted as she pinched her nose, "we have discussed this before. You cannot use violence on Natsu and Gray. While I am sure they are very annoying it resolves nothing. You cannot solve real life problems by banging its head against something."

"I can try!" Erza muttered defiantly. "And I hadn't finished!" she protested. "They had been annoying and then they had committed the worst crime anyone could ever commit!"

"They did?!" her therapist cried out worriedly. "What was it?"

"They destroyed my cake!"

Her therapist fell out of her chair and Erza blinked as the woman struggled to get back up off the floor. "Erza," she huffed, she then coughed and tried again, "Erza," she said in a gentler tone, "We have been through this as well. It is understandable that cake is a luxury to you considering your childhood but that does not mean you can punish someone for not giving it the same respect."

"Cake is the sugary soft sponge of dreams come true!" Erza cried out passionately. "It is all the good in the world iced in deliciousness and topped with strawberries or drizzled in chocolate or smothered in caramel. It is what the world needs more of, not less, and it should not, at all, be wasted. Natsu and Gray destroyed my cake, my beautiful, expensive, rare, cake with the ultimate sauce filling, before I could savour it's magical yumminess," Erza felt her fury turn to icy steel as she remembered that horrible day, the nasty splodging sound of her cake smashing against the floor, the slow-motion horror of the cake slowly going up in the air after Gray threw Natsu into the table it had been sitting on, and of course, Natsu licking at the remains and spitting it out before declaring it too sweet and not spicy enough. "Natsu and Gray were lucky I didn't stab them in the eye with my needles, repeatedly, instead for the crimes they had committed."

"But it was an accident," her therapist protested, "and it's not as if they hurt anyone."

"They hurt the cake!" Erza shouted. "They wasted it. You should never waste food and you definitely should not waste cake which is the most perfect thing in the universe! It should be considered a capital offense to let a perfectly good cake go to waste because…." Erza trailed off as she caught her therapist nervously glancing to the bin in the corner of the room, "why do you keep looking at that bin?" she asked.

"What?" her therapist squeaked. "The bin? Me? I'm not looking at anything, now why don't we move on and discuss your dreams. Have you been having any nightmares still?"

"Don't lie to me!" Erza growled. "You were looking at the – you're doing it again!"

"I am not!"

"Are too!"

"No," her therapist said forcefully, "I'm really not, and I think we should forget the bin and move onto-"

Erza flipped herself over the back of the sofa and pounced for the bin, her therapist could do nothing as she peered inside, and immediately she dropped the thing with a loud thud as horror flooded her stomach.

"There…..there…..there's a half-eaten cupcake in there!" she yelled. "Wasted! A perfectly good cupcake wasted! Why?!"

"Look," her therapist said nervously, "I had a big lunch. I wasn't hungry-"

"Then you should have saved it for later!"

"But I didn't realise until I was halfway through the cake!" her therapist protested tearfully. "And I wasn't very keen on the coconut frosting-"

"How dare you?!" Erza hissed. "Every cake should be savoured and enjoyed, you should never discriminate against a cake for its frosting. How could you be so cruel and cold-hearted? Well?!" Erza demanded furiously. "Are you going to pay for your crimes against the cake or not?!"

"I….I….I…..oh my God, I can't do this anymore!" her therapist shrieked. "I rather die than have another session with you and your weapons over cake!"

And with that, her therapist ran across the room and took a great big leap through the window, shattering the glass as she fell down.

Fortunately they were only on the second story and there was a big bush to break her fall.

The door slammed open and Laxus stood there. "What the fuck just happened?" he snapped. "I heard a crash."

"Oh," Erza blinked again," I believe I no longer need therapy sessions."

Laxus took in the sight of the shattered window and nodded solemnly. "It looks as if you passed, Gramps would be pleased. He'd been worried that the council might have you committed," he said.

"What would have happened if they did?" Erza asked hesitatingly.

"We would have broken you out, of course," Laxus shrugged, "now come on. I'm sick to death of this office and Gramps promised us cake if you did well today." He took in the sight of the room and shuddered. "Don't know how you coped with this shit. It looks like a complete nightmare."

Erza beamed at the thought of cake and people coming to her rescue (though she had been taught so much control over her magic and had lessons in combat that she probably could rescue herself) as she leaped up to her feet and quickly snatched up her jumper. "It's wasn't so bad," she said, "I learnt to knit. What do you think?" she held up her jumper.

"Nice," Laxus said in a bored tone, "could do without the stink of Natsu and Gray's blood. Couldn't you have washed the damn needles first?"

"I just wanted to finish the jumper so I could pass therapy," Erza replied with a shrug, she glanced round the room warily, "I have passed, right?"

"You weren't the one jumping out of the window, were you?" Laxus pointed out irritably, "I think it's safe to say you're saner than your therapist."

"So no more therapy sessions?"

"No more therapy sessions."

Erza ends up with another court-mandated series of therapy sessions a few months down the line but that's alright, she wasn't the only one.