I wiped the rain dripping down my face away for the 100th time that minute. Not that it helped. No matter what we did to the shelter, it still leaked. It probably wasn't helping that it was monsoon season here in Thailand. The torrential rain had made a shitty mission even worse.
"Overwatch, remind me again how this isn't punishment?" I grumbled into the radio, shifting in the tree trying to find a comfortable position.
"Why would I be punishing you?" Coulson's reply had a distinct smug tone to it. "This is a nice easy surveillance mission to ease you all back into work."
"Bullshit." Clint drew the expletive out over a few syllables. His voice was distorted by the sound of the rain on his shelter. "This sucks Coulson."
It was a few weeks after I'd burnt the resignation in Fury's office. To my surprise, Coulson hadn't said a word about it. Neither had Fury. I thought I'd escaped being in trouble for it. Then Coulson called all of us, including Jared into his office and given us this mission. We were doing surveillance on a suspected black market weapons dealer in Thailand. To start with, the mission actually sounded like something exciting to get us all back to being mission ready. However, the clincher had been we weren't the ones to take down the dealer. We were strictly surveillance only and STRIKE TEam Charlie would be the ones to come in and do the raid on the compound. The innocent smile on Coulson's face said it all as we all looked at him, dumbfounded we were being used for surveillance, made us all realise this was punishment.
"You swap out in two hours," Coulson said patiently. "You'll live until then."
Two hours was as long as twelve sitting out here in the rain watching somewhere that looked deserted from the outside. We were each doing eight hour shifts out here watching the compound. I'd never done surveillance with Clint and quickly found out why Natasha had been adamant about being partnered with Jared. Clint never stopped talking during his shift. I wasn't sure if it was a coping mechanism for being so bored. Or he was simply doing it to annoy the other person, whether that be me or whoever was monitoring our radio at the time. Coulson checked in with us every four hours.
"My balls are going to rot off before then," Clint complained. I snickered in response. The pouring rain did nothing to dampen the humidity of the jungle like terrain. To make things worse, our safe house had no air conditioning and the roof leaked. The three mile hike through the jungle to get there was a new form of hell in all this rain and mud. I was so glad after the first time, Jared was able to take us back and forth. My feet would have fallen off from foot rot by now otherwise. SHIELD was really punishing us with this mission.
"You aren't using them so what's the problem?" Coulson's sharp wit made me snort with laughter.
"Yeah, seriously Hawk, you need to stop using my hand lotion. That shit is expensive." I decided to join in the teasing for Clint's lack of sex life. "And no one is getting close enough to your balls to enjoy the jasmine scent."
There was a choked snort come from Coulson's end of the radio. I smirked in triumph at making him choke on what was probably a coffee.
"I used it on my hands," Clint said, the exasperation clear in his voice. "I don't use it to jerk off with. Now if someone would keep it down when she's having phone sex with her fuck buddy, then I could sleep better at night without those mental images."
"Then you shouldn't keep your hearing aids in and listen to us having phone sex." I wasn't being baited into that argument with Clint. "It's almost like you want those mental images for your spank bank."
"Trust me, Kari, no one needs those images in their head," Clint argued back. "I'm scarred for life."
"Gareth doesn't seem to mind."
"All right you two," Coulson cut in before we could get started tormenting each other again. "I'm signing off. Is there anything you want before I go?"
"Air conditioning," I said instantly. "And the ability to turn the rain off. Seriously, Ororo won't mind if you ask."
"And ice cream," Clint chipped in. "Food that isn't MRE's. A TV and computer would be nice, oh and a proper bed."
"Yeah, the bed would be great." I echoed. We only had a mattress on the floor at the safe house. "A fridge that actually works."
"Good bye."
Our requests were ignored. Like every other time, we complained about the lack of basic facilities in the safe house. I could hear Clint laughing under his breath on the other end of the radio as Coulson left and the new technician signed on. Clint instantly started talking to the new voice over the radio. I was waiting for Agent Hand to get over the radio soon and tell Clint off for being an asshole to all the agents dealing with us right now.
I went back to looking through my scope of the CheyTac, scanning the compound. Nothing had changed since I took over out here six hours ago. It was late afternoon here but the dark rain clouds kept the sun from coming out. Not that I think I'd seen the sun while we'd been here. On my last shift I was complaining to Coulson I was going to die from lack of Vitamin D on this mission. Thunder rumbled in the distance, promising yet another afternoon storm. I was soaked to the bone thanks to my waterproof gear deciding it didn't want to be waterproof any longer. I should have been utterly miserable yet I was happy to be out on a mission. No matter how boring or shitty it was. I expected to be out of the field for a very long time. My sessions with Andrew had slow going. I had good and bad days. It felt like one step forward and three back all the time. But, I was here and back on a mission. Even if it was a shitty surveillance mission.
A noise cut through the quiet air, instantly stopping the chatter coming from Clint. The sound of a diesel engine was loud in the quiet of the terrain.
"We've got movement." Clint radioed it in before I could.
I couldn't see the vehicle coming. The roadway into the compound was on Clint's side. I could see some people starting to stir within the compound though. A few lights were turned on inside and I could see into half a dozen people moving around inside.
"Barton, talk to me." Coulson's voice came over the radio again, surprising me. Someone must have sprinted to go and get him back to us in record time.
"Three trucks." Clint was all business now. "Guards are lightly armed. No sighting of Chen. One is unloading the cargo…"
There was a long pause as Clint trailed off. I tapped my earpiece thinking it may have cut out. The storm was coming in quick and sometimes our radios got distorted from the atmospheric interference.
"Jesus fucking christ," Clint's curse came out completely breathless. "They aren't running weapons. They've got kids."
My stomach lurched as I struggled to get a clear sight of anything. By pure luck, one of the lights came on in the building. Standing directly in the middle of the room was Jing Chen, the leader of the group.
"I have eyes on Chen." I flicked off the safety. It was a perfect shot. "Permission to shoot."
"Stand down," Coulson ordered instantly. "Get Natasha and Jared there right now Kari."
I flicked over the radio channel to the direct line we had to the safe house.
"Nat, Jared, come in."
The pause on the other end of the radio was agonising. It couldn't have been longer than thirty seconds before Jared's sleepy voice came over the radio.
"This better be something important," Jared said grumpily. "You aren't due to switch out yet and I'm not bringing you a coffee."
"We have movement." I ignored Jared's snarky reply. Though the mention of a coffee gave me a caffeine craving. "Get here now."
"Copy that." Jared was all business in an instant. "Be there in a minute."
I switched channels back so I could hear what was going on with Clint. He was relaying information back to Coulson at a million miles a minute. I looked through the scope again and found Chen still standing in the room. His arms were crossed and I could see his mouth moving as he spoke to the other man in the room.
"I still have a clear shot." I tried again, hoping Coulson would give us the good ahead. I knew we weren't meant to see any action on this mission. This was an opportunity we couldn't pass up. The idea of this mission was to hit their latest shipment and piss Chen off enough to come crawling out of the shadows. No one expected Chen to be here right now. We had a kill on sight order on him.
"Negative, stand down Kari." Coulson firm tone made my finger pull away from the trigger in an instant. "I'm trying to get an ETA on Charlie team."
I grumbled in frustration. Here we were, perfectly poised to take this down in minutes. According to Clint, there wasn't more than ten guards. We could take this all down by ourselves.
"I've got Romanoff and Jared with me now," Clint said briskly. "We have a clear entrance."
Thunder rumbled ominously right over my head. The landscape lit up as lightning flashed a second later. The storm would give us perfect cover to get in there and end this. There was muffled talking on the other end of the radio, nothing I could clearly make out.
"Coulson." Clint tried again. There was a distinct pleading tone in his voice. "The oldest kid I could see would be five."
The new bit of information knocked the breath out of me. There was scum and then there were people like Chen who did things like this. Being in Thailand it wasn't hard to piece together what the fate of these kids would be. It made me sick to my stomach.
"Go."
The order came from Coulson barely a second later.
"Take him out, Kari." Clint sounded extremely smug. "Shoot him in the balls first if you can."
A feral grin tugged at my lips as I lined my shot up. Chen and his offsider were still standing in the same position talking. While Chen wasn't going to live, I was going to make sure the next few seconds of his life were lived in terror of knowing what was about to come.
I shifted my position ever so slightly, putting the offsider in my sight first. Doing a quick mental calculation, I knew my exact path for the next five seconds.
I squeezed the trigger and automatically lined up my second shot. The offsider would be dead in an instant from the head shot. However, my second shot I went for Chen's thigh. The first bullet shattered the window and the offsider dropped before either of them could turn to look at the noise. A brilliant spray of brain tissue and blood painted the grey wall behind the offsider. Chen dropped to the ground, his mouth open in a silent scream of agony. The follow-up bullet to his head a few moments later meant whoever was doing the autopsy would have to identify him by dental records. There was nothing left off his face after the bullet ripped through it.
"Chen's down."
There was something grimly satisfying seeing Chen's face explode in my scope. There wasn't an ounce of pity for the dead man in front of me. I didn't have time to sit here and be proud of the shots I'd made. I quickly picked the CheyTac up and scrambled down the slippery tree. I could barely see it was raining so hard as I sprinted towards the compound. My boots barely had any traction in the mud and I nearly went to my knees a few times. I'd only been positioned 300 feet away. In this mud and rain, it felt like a 300 mile sprint. I could barely draw a breath into my body as I came through the compound gate.
Dead bodies were strewn everywhere. Judging by the pattern of bodies on the ground, these men weren't well trained either. A few of them had tried to run away as soon as the fighting started. I could clearly see black fletched arrows sticking out of at least two men's backs. I drew my P30 out of my thigh holster and crept forward. Once the blood stopped roaring in my ears the sound of children screaming and crying came from the trucks. I could dimly hear a few shots inside but nothing to indicate there was a massive fire fight. I made the snap decision to go to the first truck instead of running inside. There was nothing coming through my earpiece either to indicate whether I was needed.
Yanking the door open, the sound of screaming children was near deafening. I could barely make them out in the dark of the back of the truck.
"Hi," I said in my most soothing tone. "It's all right. We're here to help."
I didn't speak a word of Thai. It was too dark to make out individual faces either to see if there might have been someone who spoke English. My tone must have done the trick because the screaming stopped and there were stifled sobs instead.
"Can you stay here?" I asked the closet kid. "I have to go help the others."
I gestured towards the other two trucks hoping the kid closest to me would get the picture. Messy hair flew in every direction as the kid nodded. I could see her brown eyes, wide in horror and tear filled. My heart clenched a second later as one of the smaller at the back of the truck reached out towards me. I couldn't resist those outstretched arms. I gathered the tiny girl in my arms and hugged her hard. This little one couldn't be any older than Alexi. As I hugged her, the skinny body in my arms broke into heaving sobs. All thoughts of going inside were gone as I stood in the pouring rain cuddling the young girl.
"You're safe." I murmured as I rocked her in my arms. "No one will ever hurt you again."
The girl in my arms was so skinny and tiny. I could feel every bone in her rib cage as she clung to me for dear life. I carried her to the other two trucks checking on the children in them. From what I could see, there was an assortment of girls and boys. The third truck was empty, most likely the children had been taken inside already. There wasn't much noise coming from inside now. The occasional pop of a smaller calibre weapon. It was no surprise when Jared appeared next to me moments later after the last gunshot was heard.
"Enemy is down," Jared said with grim satisfaction. "All the children are safe. Clint and Nat are with the ones inside."
The little girl in my arms had gone quiet. Her head was on my shoulder and arms still around my neck, though her grip was getting slacker with every passing moment. Amongst the noise from the other children and the pouring rain, I didn't think she'd get to sleep that easily. Jared's grim look was replaced with a heartwarming smile as he looked at me.
"You have a friend," Jared said softly. "She's fast asleep."
"She reached out for me." I shifted the little girl in my arms, hugging her a little tighter. "I couldn't say no. She's barely any older than Alexi."
We'd just saved these children from a very grim fate and an early grave. I wouldn't be losing any sleep over putting down the men responsible for this.
"How are the others?" Jared gestured towards the truck. A few children had gotten brave and poked their heads out of the back of the truck. They were all filthy and bedraggled. My heart broke all over again seeing dried blood on some of their faces. It was clear the men had been rough with them. Who knew when they last had a decent meal and a soft bed.
"Alive and safe." There wasn't much else to say. A few of the older looking children had jumped down from the trucks and come over to Jared and me.
Jared knelt down to the closet one and asked what sounded like a question in Thai. The boy nodded vigorously, sticking his fingers in his mouth. Jared's smile seemed to give a few others the courage to get down from the trucks. The rain was starting to come in even harder now, soaking everyone within seconds.
"Let's get them inside," Jared said, holding his hand out to the young boy in front of him. The child's face lit up and he held up his arms to Jared.
It was funny seeing my brother who's reputation was a cold hearted assassin, picking up the boy in front of him and cradling him close. The relief was clear on Jared's face as he spoke a few words to the child, earning him a smile as the boy put his head on Jared's shoulder. It was all it took to get the rest of the children climbing down from the trucks. A few of the younger ones had to be helped down but we managed to get everyone inside with no protest at all.
The building was an old two story brick building. The lights flickered ominously as we walked in. Jared came to the first room and pushed the door open. He spoke again in his competent Thai, gesturing towards the open room. A few of the children had blank looks on their face as Jared spoke but soon got the hint as everyone else started to move in. The room got crowded quickly but at least everyone was out of the weather. The little girl in my arms stirred as I tried to put her down. It quickly became a whimper before she started crying, clinging onto me like he life depended on it.
"It's okay," I tried to reassure her, gently untangling her arms from around my neck. "I'll be back for you."
Jared translated for me. The only effect it had was the girl shaking her head and crying. I gave up, letting her hug me again. I couldn't begin to imagine the hell these kids would have been through. I wasn't going to deny this little girl a bit of comfort for the first time in who knew how long. Even the boy Jared had been holding had put up a bit of an argument about being put down. At least the boy was old enough to understand whatever Jared was saying to him.
"Stay here." Jared shot me a sympathetic look. "I'll see what we can do for communications. The storm is messing with our radios."
No wonder I didn't hear anything in my earpiece while this was all going on. I nodded while gently bouncing the little girl trying to get her to settle down again. Whether it was the gentle bouncing or the fact I didn't try and put her down again, the girl in my arms stopped crying quickly. I settled down on the floor as best I could with her clinging to me. Within seconds, I had all the children in the room making a beeline for me.
"Who likes stories?" I asked, scanning all of the faces looking up at me. I don't think any of them understood but I had their attention at least. "Once there was a very hungry caterpillar…"
I managed to keep all of the children amused until Jared came with, Natasha and Clint in tow with him. Even in the dim light, I could see that Natasha was rattled. Her normally cool exterior was pinched and drawn as she looked around the room. I thought she was going to leave. It wasn't until one of the girls looked at Natasha and gave her a bright smile. She babbled something and pointed at Natasha's hair. There was a long pause before Natasha's tight posture relaxed and she sat down next to me.
I became the second favourite as most of the girls made a beeline for Natasha. Her red hair had them all fascinated.
"We've got a team that should be landing in about 40 minutes," Clint murmured as he lowered himself to the ground. "They'll take all the children with them so they're out of this weather and safe. We'll take one of the vehicles left here and head to our safe house."
"What's going to happen to them?" I looked out over the small crowd in the room. Jared was sitting beside Natasha, spinning a dramatic tale in Thai. There were no more tears in the room, only smiles and the occasional high pitched laughter.
"SHIELD has ties with adoption agencies, private and government," Clint said with a strained smile. "They'll get American passports and go through the foster system. Most of them get adopted right away, which is a small blessing."
I craned my head to look at the little girl who was fast asleep on my shoulder. My heart ached at the thought of her being taken away by strangers again and being put through the foster system if no one adopted her. It was a better life than what would have otherwise happened to her. It didn't make it any less heartbreaking that she was going to still go through a traumatic change in her life. The only consolation was she was probably too young that it would leave a lasting memory.
"I'd rather face a battlefield of soldiers than do these jobs," Clint said softly. He reached over and pushed the hair back over the little girls ears. She didn't stir at all at Clint's touch. I wondered when the last time was that she got a decent night sleep. "They're safe now. I'm going to see if I can scrounge up some food for them and find some towels."
I nodded, not sure what else to say. There was nothing for me to do except sit here and wait. Clint got up and left without another word. Once we were alone again, I was going to hug both him and Natasha. Seeing these children had affected me deeply. My feelings would be nothing compared to what Natasha and Clint would be going through right now. I knew Clint's time in the foster system had been shitty. Natasha had lived through this situation of being a child and torn away from her family. It was only her sheer determination she'd made it to where she was now.
Clint was back in less than five minutes with an armful of towels.
"There's not a scrap of food anywhere," Clint looked on the verge of losing his temper. "How the fuck were they going to feed thirty kids?"
Clint cut himself off before his rant could get out of hand. He closed his eyes and took in a few deep breaths before opening them again. I took the hint and quickly got up, taking some of the towels from him. Natasha did the same thing but not before giving Clint's arm a tight squeeze. Clint nodded in understanding and rolled his shoulders to ease some of the tension in his body.
Most of the children knew what to do with the towels. A few of the younger ones needed to be helped. It was a good way to pass the time, even if it was completely awkward for me to do with the girl still asleep in my arms. The sound of a Quinjet soon filled the evening air a lot quicker than I expected. My watch had become waterlogged in the first day and decided not to work so I had no way of telling the time.
"I'll go get them," Natasha said, slipping away without another word. She'd been very quiet while we dried all of the children off. I was expecting all of us to need a very big bottle of alcohol after this tonight.
I picked up the towel she dropped and ran it over the hair of the boy in front of me. He smiled up at me, laughing as he reached up to feel his hair sticking up. Despite the grim mood, I smiled back at him. All of the children were so skinny and bedraggled. At least now they were in good spirits.
"Lek." The boy pointed to himself. With a shy smile, he pointed at me.
"Kari." I mimicked his movements, smiling down at him. "Jared and Clint."
I pointed over to the two men who were busy helping some of the other children dry off. Jared had a small group following his every movement.
Lek, as he introduced himself, grinned before shoving his fingers in his mouth. He had a toothy grin and lit up his face. He couldn't have been an older than four. It was hard to tell because of how skinny and small most of them were. Lek stuck by my side as I moved to the next child, a girl who was shivering, despite the warm weather. I didn't want to take off her tattered dress so I draped a towel around her, wrapping her up in a warm cocoon. She was one of the children who still looked bewildered by what was happening around her. Her eyes were wide and tear filled as
Natasha came back in before I could move onto anyone else. Behind her was a group of women carrying supplies. With amazing efficiency, they all got to work. A petite brunette came over to where I was standing with Lek and the girl who I'd cocooned in the towels.
"Hi, I'm Mona," she said brightly. Her face was warm and welcoming. Whatever she said next was in another language.
Both of the children looked at her blankly. It didn't deter her in the slightest, she tried again with something else. This time Lek nodded, his fingers still in his mouth.
"Thank god for that," Mona murmured under her breath while still smiling. She glanced sideways at me, noticing the girl in my arms. "Has she been asleep the entire time?"
"No, she screamed up a storm when I tried to put her down," I explained, feeling very out of place right now. "Is there anything I can help with?"
"You're going to have to put her down," Mona said, giving me an apologetic smile. "Brace yourself for some tears. This part is never easy for them. Or us."
I steeled myself for the tears as I started to untangle the girl from my neck. It stirred her from her slumber and as soon as she realised I was putting her down, she started to cry uncontrollably. The sobs quickly turned to screams as Mona gently pried her off me.
"Shhh, it's going to be all right." My soothing words were useless. The girl screamed, reaching out to me, kicking and flailing in Mona's grip.
"Come on sweetie, you're going to be all right," Mona's gentle voice was drowned out by her screaming. "Everything is going to be fine."
It was getting harder to hold back my threatening tears as the little girl shook her head, desperately trying to reach out to me again. I desperately wanted to give in and scoop her back up, holding her close. It wouldn't help the situation though. I knew I had to let her go but this was ripping my heart out of my chest and stomping it into the mud.
"Maybe you should leave?" Mona suggested, though not unkindly. "This is really hard on them."
How many times had the little girl had someone walked out of her life and never come back? I knew I had to do it but my feet were firmly rooted on the spot.
"Hey." Jared's voice came next to me. He had a bright smile on his face but I could tell was very forced. In his hands, there was a teddy bear. "Look what I have."
Jared held out the bear to the girl. She shook her head again, crying and stretching out to me as much as Mona would allow her. I had an idea, one that I hoped might help. I took the teddy bear and gave it a big hug and then held it out to her. The screaming stopped, though she was still crying as she took the teddy bear from me.
"Hug him for me?" I motioned to the bear and imitated the hug I'd give it.
Tentatively, the girl hugged the teddy bear and looked back at me with her heart broken face. It was the same look Alexi gave me when I had to leave and wasn't taking her with me. It took every bit of my self control not to reach out and take her back from Mona. I had a fleeting moment of wanting to take her home with me. It was a batshit crazy idea. One that would never work.
"Think of me every time you hug the teddy bear," I said, rather uselessly. Next, to me, Jared quickly translated what I'd just said. "I'll always be with you when you have him."
Tears were still pouring down at her as she looked at me. She hugged the teddy bear again with a loud sniff. I was quickly reminded how I was not cut out to be a parent by being grossed out by the giant snot bubble coming out of her nose. Regardless of the gross snot bubble, I smiled at her.
"You're going to grow up and be an amazing young lady." It took a lot to swallow back my rising tears. Jared was translating as fast as I could speak. He looked suspiciously teary himself. "Nothing is going to stand in your way and you can be anything you want. Hug your teddy and remember that."
The little girl hugged her teddy bear even tighter as she looked between Jared and me. She was still crying but the tears seemed to be slowing down now. I wasn't sure how much she understood but she stopped struggling against Mona. Before my own resolve crumpled, I got up and left the room.
I didn't get far. Three steps out of the room I had to stop and force my emotions back under control. Jared was right behind me. He pulled me into a tight hug. Neither of us spoke. There were no words to describe how I was feeling right now. I was happy that we'd stopped the horrible fate waiting for these children. I couldn't stop being heartbroken that no matter what, they were still in for a rough time over the next few days. Even if it was going to be better than being sold into slavery, it was still very hard.
The social workers, as I found out they were, worked tirelessly to get all of the children changed out of their rags, fed and onto the Quinjet within two hours. We stayed guard until the last of them boarded. Mona and my little girl were amongst the last ones. The little girl was in Mona's arms, cuddling her teddy bear. She gave me a wave and a timid smile as they walked away. I smiled back, waving until they were out of sight.
The ramp of the Quinjet closed behind them. A minute later, the engines rumbled to life and the Quinjet lifted into the night sky, leaving the four of us standing in the darkness.
"Let's get the fuck out of here."
It was Natasha's suggestion. None of us argued. Clint, Natasha and I went to the nearest truck but Jared stayed in the same spot.
"Jared?" I called out to him. He'd barely said a word since he left the room with me.
Jared didn't say anything. He glanced back at us before teleporting away somewhere.
"For fuck sake, Jared," Clint muttered, opening the door to step out into the drizzling rain. He only got one foot out before Jared was back.
"Drive."
Clint didn't ask why. He stomped on the gas pedal, making the truck fish tail on the slippery ground. The wheels finally gained some traction as we sped away into the darkness. We only made it onto the badly maintained road before an orange glow came from behind us.
"What…" I began to ask, only to be cut off by a deafening explosion. The compound behind us burst into flames, sending a fireball up into the night sky. The kinetic shock hit us a second later, making the truck wobble dangerously on the slippery road. Clint cursed, struggling to keep us from crashing as the truck careened from side to the side.
"Good riddance to fucking pieces of shit." Jared folded his arms, turning to face the front again.
"Here, here," Natasha said firmly.
It was a long ass drive to our new safe house. It was made even longer by the detour to our other safe house to pick up our belongings. Despite being asked several times if he needed to switch out, Clint drove the entire way. No one really spoke, leaving us all wrapped up in our own thoughts. Mine were mostly thinking of the little girl who I'd given the teddy bear to. By now they would have been halfway back to the US. All the children were fed, clothed and probably feeling the safest they had in a long time. I really hoped all of their dreams were undisturbed and whatever was in for them next, was going to make their lives happy.
The safe house was a few hours west of Bangkok in a town called Kanchanaburi. It was a tourist destination, meaning none of us got a second glance as we drove through the streets. The safe house was tucked in a quiet street on the outskirts of town. I stiffly climbed out of the truck and trudged up the few steps to the front door. Scanning my fingerprint, the door opened soundlessly. The blast of air conditioning made my damp clothes cling to me and I was shivering within a second of stepping inside. I flicked the lights on, basking the room in a warm glow.
"Oh sweet, sweet air con, how I've missed you," Jared groaned in delight as he walked in behind me. "I'm going straight to bed."
The safe house was fully secured so there was no need for one of us to stand guard. It wasn't a big house at all. A bedroom and a bathroom came from the main room. A small kitchen was towards the back of the house.
"Me too." I went to the bedroom. I could see four real beds in the semi darkness of the room. Natasha followed me, stripping off as she walked into the room. We both left a trail of muddy footprints on the clean tiles. I was too tired to care though. I managed to work the laces of my boots undone, kicking them off at the door of the bedroom. I propped the CheyTac against the wall near my boots. I was down to my underwear by the time I fell into the bed.
"Unless the world is ending, don't wake me up." Natasha's voice was barely distinguishable with her face buried in the pillow.
I grunted in response. I'd barely slept over the last few days and it was hitting me all at once. I pulled up the blanket over my half naked body and was asleep before Jared and Clint could settle in their beds.
I jolted awake far too quickly, not too long after closing my eyes. It was still dark in the room and I had no idea why I'd woken up. I could hear Clint's distinctive soft snores in the darkness. There was another noise though. Soft footsteps padding across the room. I had turned on my side in my sleep so I was facing the wall. I was about to turn to see who was awake when another voice made me stop.
"What's up?" Jared's sleepy voice came through the darkness.
There was a creak of weight being added to a mattress. I was glad I didn't answer Jared because I quickly realised he wasn't talking to me.
"I can't sleep." Natasha sounded exhausted, despite her words. "Today hit too close to home."
I heard Jared sigh as the bed creaked again.
"I know. But those kids are all safe now. No one is ever going to hurt them," Jared's reassurance made me smile in the darkness. "We did good Tasha. Cling onto that, nothing else.
There was a long pause and some rustling of fabric moving. It sounded like Natasha was crawling into bed with Jared. I settled back down, closing my eyes again. Jared was right. We'd done a very good job on this mission. It was the first mission in a long time where nothing had completely gone to shit and we'd actually made a difference in the world. It was a very good feeling. I'd nearly fallen back asleep when another sound woke me up.
It was the sound of kissing.
"Fuck, Nat, what are you doing?" It stopped as quickly as it had started. Jared's voice came out breathless and full of shock.
"Kissing you," Natasha said with a seductive tone. "I thought that was obvious."
There was some more shuffling and another kiss.
"Don't." The warning was clear in Jared's voice this time. The bed creaked again as weight was shifted around. "We talked about this and we agreed we wouldn't do this anymore."
What the fuck did Jared mean? I stiffened in the darkness, in complete shock at what was happening beside me. A lot of people had reassured me that Jared and Natasha had never slept together. Natasha herself had said the same thing on many occasions. They both flirted with each other like crazy. A few times I'd been mildly suspicious but Natasha had always assured me there was nothing going on between them.
"You didn't mind last time," Natasha purred. "Remember that night with the red wine after Pripyat when you came to LA?"
"We were both drunk and that wasn't the idea of the night," Jared said firmly.
"And that time just after Kari joined our team?"
My mind stretched back trying to think of what the fuck Natasha was talking about. The mention of red wine dragged up a nearly forgotten memory. I remembered the day I went to buy my motorbike that Natasha was mildly hungover. She'd mentioned a fuck buddy and a few bottles of red wine.
"Again, we were drunk and that wasn't the plan." This time Jared didn't sound quite as convincing as before. "We said after that night in LA we wouldn't do this again. I'm not getting my feelings hurt again."
"Then don't catch feelings." There was a distinct bite in Natasha's tone. Her flirty side was gone in the snap of a finger. "You of all people should be good at that."
"That's not fair," Jared bit back just as hard as Natasha's tone.
The sound of footsteps stomped across the room and the door got flung open. The bed creaked again and a heavier set of footsteps followed.
"Natasha," Jared called out, seemingly oblivious to the noise they were making.
The front door opened and slammed a second later. It was hard enough to wake the dead. The floor opened a second time a few seconds later and slammed shut again. The silence in the house was far too loud after all the noise that had occurred.
"Did I just dream that?" Clint's voice made me jump. I turned over to look over at him in the darkness. He was sitting on the edge of his bed looking in the direction of the front door.
"No." I wasn't going back to sleep now. My mind was a whirlwind of what I'd just heard. "Did you know anything about this?"
I couldn't keep the hurt out of my voice. Clint and Natasha had been friends for a long time. Despite his reassurance of Natasha not sleeping with Jared, numerous times, now I wasn't sure if he'd been lying to my the entire time. They'd both been spies for a lot longer than me. Lying was second nature to them.
"Kari, I promise I knew nothing." Clint got up and flicked the light on. He looked just as betrayed as I felt right now. "I had my suspicions a few years ago but nothing ever came of it. Or so I thought."
I felt my eyes burn with tears as I stared at Clint. Natasha was my best friend and she'd lied to my face, many times, about sleeping with my brother. I'd never felt so betrayed in my life.
"Hey, come here." Clint got up and crossed the room quickly. He sat down on my bed and pulled me into a hug. "Don't cry. They had me fooled too. I'm Hawkeye, I'm meant to notice things like this."
I was too emotionally drained and exhausted to do anything except hug Clint back.
"I'm not making excuses for her, but you know Natasha doesn't think they same way we do," Clint said gently. "She probably thought she was doing the right thing by not telling us. I'm not getting back to sleep any time soon. Do you want some food?"
I nodded, not trusting myself not to burst into tears if I spoke. I got dressed in a spare change of clothes I had in my bag and went and sat in the kitchen with Clint. Unlike our other safe house, this one was well stocked. Clint had enough ingredients to throw together something that was nearly as good as his famous stir fry. After some food in my stomach and a quick shower, I was feeling a little more human. Nothing was going to calm the storm of emotions going through me though.
Natasha came back a few hours later. Clint and I were sitting on the couch watching TV to pass the time when she stormed in. Natasha didn't glance at either of us and went straight to the bathroom, slamming the door shut. She was still dressed in her tactical gear and was barefoot which would have made an interesting sight in daylight. Clint and I looked at each other.
"I'm really fucking angry now," I said before he could ask if I wanted to talk to her. "You can deal with it."
Clint looked at the door with a huge sigh. I could see his internal struggle clearly on his face. An angry Natasha was never fun. This was going to be a hundred times worse because of the situation. Clint slowly climbed to his feet and walked to the bathroom. He raised his hand, obviously hesitating about knocking.
"Fuck off Barton."
Natasha's voice was dripping with venom. Clint took the hint and backed away from the door instantly.
"I'm not dealing with that either."
The phone ringing in the safe house made both of us jump. Clint crossed the room quickly and snatched it up, pausing at the other end would be going through the security protocols. Clint answered them with ease, his body relaxing as he lent against the wall.
"Morning, Coulson," Clint said casually. "We're more than ready to leave."
Clint paused, absently twirling the ancient phone cable around his fingers. I hadn't seen a non cordless phone in years. It was amusing that SHIELD had some of the most technologically advanced designs, yet this safe house had a phone from the 90's in here. In the bathroom, I heard the shower start up.
"Yeah, he and Nat had a fight last night. I have no idea what is was about." The half lie slid easily from Clint's mouth. I was always impressed at how easily he could do it. Not that Coulson brought it very often. From any of us. "So I'm not surprised he requested to go straight home."
That explained where Jared was. I wasn't surprised either that he decided to go straight home. I probably would have punched him in the face if he came back in the house today.
"That will put us back on…" Clint trailed off, his face scrunched up in concentration at whatever he was working out. "Mid morning on the 22nd, sound right?"
22nd. That was the day Gareth was getting back from Iraq. He wasn't due to be in until later in the evening. An idea quickly formed in my head. I hadn't promised Gareth I'd be back on time when I told him I was going on a mission. He was going to go home and wait for me to get back before he drove up to DC for a week. This could be a nice surprise for me. It would also get me away from Natasha until I cooled down a bit. I didn't trust myself not to lose my shit at her for lying to me for so long. The betrayal really hurt and I wasn't feeling inclined to let this one slide.
"Can I talk to Coulson?" I asked motioning to the phone. Clint had been silent while listening to whatever Coulson was saying.
"Kari wants to talk to you," Clint said, probably interrupting Coulson in the middle of something important. Or boring. Without waiting for a response, Clint held the phone out to me.
I cradled the bulky object in my hand, staring at it in mild amusement.
"Hi." I didn't waste time in going for what I wanted. "Can I get permission to land at Langley first and then Hawk flies back to DC?"
"I can ask," Coulson didn't seem surprised at my request. "Gareth's back that day, isn't he?"
"Yeah, sometime that night." I was happy at his easy acceptance of the idea. It wasn't often I asked a favour from Coulson and sometimes it worked to my advantage. "I thought I might surprise him with something nice instead of me bleeding profusely in the hallway of a medical wing."
Gareth and I still hadn't spoken about when he found me at Camp Cooke last time. If anything, he seemed to roll with it as being part of my life. I was very grateful for his easy acceptance of everything he'd seen. A lot of people would have run screaming.
"I'll ring Sharpe and see if he can pull some string too," Coulson said with a small laugh. There was a fond tone in his voice. "From me, it's a yes. You'll have to wait for the official response though. I was saying to Barton that STRIKE Team Charlie is waiting for you at a small airport 20 miles from where you are now. Jared is already home, so when you guys are ready you can head straight there and come home. Do you have any idea what Natasha and Jared fought about?"
"No idea." I hoped my lie was as smooth as Clint's. "I came in and passed out. They were both gone when I woke up."
Coulson sighed heavily on the other end of the phone. I wasn't sure if it was because he knew I was lying or he didn't want to deal with the argument between Natasha and Jared.
"I'll let Charlie team know you'll be on the way soon," Coulson said calmly. His tone not giving anything away. "I will get back to you as soon as I know about landing at Langley."
"Thanks, Coulson."
Coulson hung up without saying goodbye. No doubt I'd just made the next few hours of his day interesting. Even if the answer ended up being no, I knew Coulson would have done everything he possibly could to make it happen for me.
The shower stopped as I hung up the phone. Natasha stepped out, wrapped up in a towel. If it was me in her shoes, I would have tried to hide as much as possible. Natasha strode out of the bathroom, head held high and a completely indifferent expression on her face. Her face was redder than normal, whether it was from the hot shower or something else, I wouldn't know.
"When are we leaving?"
Natasha's accent was non existent most of the time, mostly through training and her living in the US for so long now. In times of stress, it came out. Right now, her accent was creeping through. Her only tell tale sign that she was upset.
"As soon as you're dressed." Clint folded his arms, not bothering to cover his disapproving stare. "Are we going to talk about what happened last night?"
"How much did you hear?" Natasha levelled a blank stare at Clint. It was only then I noticed she was doing everything she could not look at me. I wasn't sure if I was angry or upset at that. Anger seemed to be the winning emotion this morning. I could feel my temper starting to simmer under the surface.
"Everything. The entire fucking neighbourhood heard your little dispute," Clint said with a heavy frown. "How long has that been going on?"
"A few weeks after Yellowstone is when it first happened." Natasha's voice lacked any emotion. "It's been on and off since then."
Yellowstone was the first time Jared had worked with Natasha and Clint. It had been quite a few years ago when Jared was still new in SHIELD.
"Since Yellowstone…." Clint trailed off with an angry huff. He clenched his jaw and closed his eyes, taking in a few deep breaths. "And all the times I've flat out asked you if there was something going on between you and Jared?"
"Who is I fuck is none of your business, Barton." There was a bite on Natasha's tone this time. "Or anyone else."
It wasn't hard to tell the last part was levelled at me. Even though Natasha wouldn't look in my direction. I wasn't going to stand here and listen to this. I was too angry to speak to Natasha right now. My best friend had lied to me for months. I was so hurt about this. I stormed from the room and went to the bedroom. I was packed and storming out to our truck in two minutes. Clint was only a minute behind me. He slid into the passenger seat as I drummed my fingers against the steering wheel. I was so angry, I was seriously considering leaving without Natasha.
"Coulson will kill us if we leave her here." Clint only needed to take one look at my face to guess what I was thinking. "Then you won't get to surprise Gareth."
That mollified me enough to wait until Natasha came out of the house and slid into the backseat. She said nothing to either of us. She didn't even look to the front seat. The drive to our destination passed in absolute silence. Clint sat beside me, grinding his teeth in anger. Natasha was stony and silent in the backseat. I had nothing but my racing thoughts to keep me occupied.
I'd never had a close friendship like I had with Natasha. We told each other everything, from the gross details of our personal habits, like popping pimples to pulling out ingrown hairs for each other, to talking to each other about everything. I thought I knew exactly what was going on in Natasha's personal life. She never held anything back from me before. Or so I though. If she had told me she'd slept with Jared a few times from the start, I may have been mildly annoyed or disgusted about it. It would have been over and done with though. Now I was second guessing everything Natasha had ever told me in our friendship. If she lied about her and Jared, what else was she lying about? This was the first mission in a long time that I'd felt good about. It was completely ruined now thanks to Natasha and Jared.
Charlie team were waiting for us as we arrived at the small airport. The Quinjet was already powered up, thanks to whoever flew it here. As we got out of the truck with our gear, Natasha came to stand beside me.
"I don't know what to say to fix this." Even though her face was blank of emotion, Natasha sounded the most unsure of herself I'd ever heard.
"Sorry would be a good start," I snapped, my anger still boiling. "But I doubt you know the meaning of that word, even if you did, I doubt there'd be any truth behind it."
I'd never seen Natasha look so hurt before. The genuine shock and sadness on her face made me regret my snarl. I was still too angry to apologise for it. I wasn't ready to forgive her so quickly.
Natasha snatched her bag up and stormed off to the Quinjet. The few Charlie team guys hanging around the ramp were smart enough to jump out of her way. Natasha looked angry for the rest of the world to see. What she was genuinely feeling, I wasn't sure. I didn't really care right now either.
Clint said nothing at our little exchange. He shot me a sympathetic look before we got to the ramp of the Quinjet. No one on Charlie team was stupid enough to ask us what was wrong either. They all got out of our way and quickly boarded behind us. As soon as the last person was strapped in, I took off with a lot more speed than we needed. Even Clint was white knuckled next to me as the near vertical and way too fast take off. Once we got to altitude, I didn't hold back either. I pushed the Quinjet to the limit of speed I was meant to be doing.
Flying hard and fast was a good way to soothe my frazzled nerves. The tension began to leave my body muscle by muscle as I flew through the rainy weather to clear skies. The hours trickled by as I kept the Quinjet on manual. It gave my mind something to concentrate on and not keep dwelling on my anger at Natasha and Jared. We were a few hours from landing when Coulson came over the radio.
"Permission granted to land at Langley Base. Barton, you've got the Quinjet all to yourself back to the Triskelion."
Clint and I exchanged near identical excited grins. Me for being able to go ahead with my surprise for Gareth. Clint for being allowed to fly all by himself. It wasn't often he got to do a flight without me.
I pulled the stick on the Quinjet back a little faster as Clint confirmed the order over the radio. I could shave a bit of flying time off with a slight increase in speed. Well, maybe more than a slight increase in speed.
Authors Note
Thanks for your patience everyone while I got this one out. Only two exams to go and I'm free from Uni for an entire month. I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter with the small bombshell of Natasha and Jared. It was fun being able to put some things that have been there from the start in.
I've started on the mammoth task of editing Crystallize from the start. While nothing major in the story is being changed, there have been some things that I've tweaked to fit into the story better. Going back and re-reading some of the earlier stuff made me realise I had some plot holes to tighten up and things to fix. I've been putting when the chapters are edited at the bottom of the author's notes, in case anyone has gone and done a big re-read. Or are reading for the first time.
Your support is amazing. I can't thank you all enough for the reviews. They always make my day. I won't get another chapter out now until after exams, which ends towards the end of June. Hopefully, this chunky one is enough to keep everyone satisfied. On my break, I'll be catching up on Shatter Me and working on a few one shots I've had floating around as well. Feel free to reach out to me on Facebook, Tumblr or IG if you want to ask anything.
Until next time.