Summary: Natsu and Happy are being unprofessional and causes Lucy to lose her temper and be unprofessional….again.

Pairings: Some implied Natsu/Happy/Lucy friendship

YouTube Prompt: Natsu/Lucy video to 'Dustland Fairy Tale' by The Killers.

Lucy found a decent, but incredibly boring and simple, job (which meant Natsu shouldn't cause too much damage) that had lots of money in the reward (rent would be covered for two whole months with her third), was nearby (so no motion sickness for Natsu because Lucy would be willing to walk this), and the client didn't have a very rude name (she checked, just in case, she didn't want it to end like the last few times) therefore absolutely nothing can go wrong on this and surely, surely, she would be able to make her rent in time.

She just didn't count on Natsu and Happy's childish stupidity to get in the way.

(Which in hindsight was really stupid of her, whenever they were out of a serious life or death situation, they were a pair of morns.)

The day started of great, they were on time, nothing worrying had happened, and they were able to find the home of their client with ease. "Hi!" Lucy, Natsu, and Happy chorused cheerfully when a lady opened the door, "We're the Fairy Tail mages you requested," Lucy added, "I'm Lucy, this is Natsu, and that's Happy."

"Oh good!" the lady said happily. "It's so nice to meet you, I'm Mrs Kilpatrick and-"

"OH MY GOD!" Happy screeched, utterly horrified, "YOU KILLED PATRICK?! IS THAT WHY WE'RE HERE?!" he shrieked turning to Lucy. "ARE WE HERE TO HELP HIDE A BODY?!"

"What?!" Lucy barked. "No! We're here to help Mrs Kilpatrick with her-"

"Why?!" Natsu wailed dramatically. "Why would you kill Patrick?! He was such a nice guy, he never hurt anyone, he…." And then, he blinked, and looked around confused. "And who's Patrick?" he asked. "What did he do?"

Lucy face-palmed, did Natsu only just realise now that he didn't know a Patrick?

"Erm…" Mrs Kilpatrick blinked, "I….don't know a Patrick."

"You don't know Patrick?!" Natsu repeated. "So you just brutally murdered a stranger for no reason?"

"You monster!"

"Fiend!"

"Scoundrel!"

"Poor Patrick," Natsu said mournfully, "we shall have to remember him fondly."

"Yes," Happy said solemnly, "for he is now swimming with the fishes…"

"Natsu, Happy," Lucy hissed dangerously, she couldn't help but notice their client was slowly edging towards her front door and starting to hide behind it. Any minute now she was going to slam it in their faces and they would lose another job. "If you don't shut up and stop embarrassing me, I'm going to change my name."

Happy and Natsu exchanged startled looks, they were obviously expecting a more violent threat and the idea of Lucy changing her name was very random.

"Into what?" they both asked.

"Kill-Natsu-and-Happy."

Within an instant the pair of them ran down the dusty road, leaving a storm cloud of dust and sand flying behind them. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Natsu screamed dramatically. "SOMEONE HELP! WE'RE GONNA BE MURDERED!"

"LUCY IS SO MEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!"

"GET BACK HERE RIGHT NOW!" Lucy bellowed as she ran after her childishly moronic partners. "WE'RE GOING TO FINSIH THIS JOB OR SO HELP ME GOD, I WILL MURDER YOU!"

Mrs Kilpatrick sighed heavily as she leaned against the door. "I don't why I thought a guild full of young people and talking cats would be professional," she mumbled to herself. "I should have gone with an older guild with more mature members, like that nice Blue Pegasus, those boys seemed to be under some actual adult guidance."

(She regrets this when it turns out that adult guidance in Blue Pegasus meant every young, fresh-faced, member knew how to flirt excessively. There was nothing professional about that either.)