Summary: Set in my 'The One with the Secret Relationship', Gray is unable to cope with Juvia's cuddling and asks for some advice.

Pairings: Gray/Juvia, Gajeel/Levy, Natsu/Lucy, Gajeel/Juvia friendship, Gajeel/Gray friendship, Lucy/Gray friendship, Natsu/Gray friendship, Levy/Gray friendship, and Juvia/Levy friendship.

YouTube Prompt: Fairy Tail Girls/Couples tribute to 'Black Magic' by Little Mix.

To absolutely no one's surprise, Gray and Juvia became a couple after Natsu and Lucy's blessing. It had always been a matter of time before Gray finally gave in and allowed Juvia to have her way (and to stop denying his own feelings, of course), and the romantic setting of a best friend's wedding was perfect for that moment to happen.

The annoying thing was though it was quickly becoming apparent to everyone that Gray was incapable of pursuing a romantic relationship without some mini-drama going on. As proven by the very moment he slammed open Lucy's door (and got an earful from Lucy) and demanded; "do I look fat to you?!"

"No," Gajeel grunted behind his magazine, "but your lip will if you keep annoying me."

Gray ignored him and looked directly at the others. "Well?" he asked shortly. "Do I look fat to you?"

Natsu and Lucy exchanged bewildered looks while Levy blinked. "….No," they all said.

"Okay," Gray said, "I accept that. When Juvia asked me that and I said no, she took that to mean that I was calling her a cow."

Gajeel dropped his magazine. "What," he growled, "did you do to her?"

"Nothing!"

"I don't believe you," Gajeel glared.

"Okay," Lucy said exasperatedly, determined to prevent a fight between Gray and Gajeel….in her apartment at least. "Walk us through it. We can't help you if you're making no sense."

"Okay," Gray breathed in deeply and exhaled, "Juvia said 'hi, do I look fat today?' and I looked at her-"

"Whoa, whoa," Natsu interrupted, his eyes wide with horror. "You looked at her?" he asked as if Gray was the idiotic one.

Lucy shook her head, Levy rolled her eyes, and Gajeel groaned. "You never look," he grunted. "You just answer. Like a reflex. Do I look fat? No!"

"Is she prettier than I am?" Natsu piped up. "No!"

"Does size matter?" Gajeel asked.

"No!" Lucy and Levy both chorused.

"And it works both ways," Natsu grinned, "even I know you never look. It always looks like that you're lying."

Gray stared at the two couples in disbelief. He had relationships before but he had never realised how much complicated crap went into them. Slowly, he sat down on one of Lucy's kitchen chairs. "And you guys just know this stuff?" he asked. "I find it hard to believe, especially with him." At this he pointed at Natsu.

Natsu turned bright red at that. "What is that supposed to mean?!" he snarled.

"Gihihi," Gajeel sniggered, "That you're an idiot Salamander."

"Why you-"

"After thirty or forty fights," Lucy said loudly, determined to prevent another fight in her apartment, "you can't help but catch on."

"For example," Levy said, "say if Juvia was coming back from a trip and she gave you two options. Option number one she'll take a cab from the airport or option number two you can meet her in baggage claim. What do you do?"

"That's easy," Gray said confidently, "baggage claim."

"EH!" Natsu buzzed loudly. "You're wrong. Now you're single again."

"As if Juvia would ever break up with this pervert," Gajeel muttered darkly, sending Gray another glare, "the answer is actually secret option number three. You meet her at the gate, dumbass. That way she knows that you love her."

Gray's jaw dropped. Since when did his friends become relationship experts? "All right," he said as he scooted closer to them. "I have another one, Juvia likes to cuddle at night which I'm all for!" Gray added hastily as Gajeel began to crack his knuckles and both Lucy and Levy glowered at him. "But you know when you want to go to sleep, you want some space. So how do I tell her that without you know…accidentally calling her fat or something."

"You mean sending her into crying a literal river like you always do?" Gajeel deadpanned.

"Yeah," Gray said uncomfortably, "that."

"Well sorry we can't help you there," Lucy said in a disgustingly, uncharacteristically, mushy tone, she then turned to gaze deeply into Natsu's eyes, and much to the revolution of everyone in that room, Natsu returned the look with a slavish expression on her face, "because we're cuddly sleepers."

"Not just sleepers," Natsu beamed, as he leaned in a nuzzled Lucy's nose with his own, "we're snuggle buddies."

They kissed before Natsu ducked down and pressed his face against the crook of Lucy's neck, his arms wrapped round her waist, as Lucy brought her arms round his shoulders, and they sank into the sofa for some private cuddling time.

"Urgh!" Gray turned his eyes to the not so disgustingly, mushy, lovey-dovey couple. There was still a respectful three feet between Gajeel and Levy as they both stared at Natsu and Lucy in horror and disgust. "What about you guys?"

"Sorry," Levy smiled, "we're also cuddly sleepers."

"Just not nauseatingly public about it like those two."

And with that Gray decided he was doomed to forever be suffocated by Juvia's hair while he tried to sleep and sloped off home in order to make plans to win Juvia back.

FTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFT

"Okay," Gajeel growled as he stormed past Gray, "here's what you do-"

"What the hell?!" Gray yelped as he closed his apartment door. "Did you follow me home?"

He hadn't even noticed that his gigantic, covered in piercings, friend had apparently stalked him across New York City….he should pay more attention. Gajeel could have been a killer out to get him.

(Though sometimes it felt like he was.)

"Not the point," Gajeel said impatiently. "The point is I'm here to help you with your cuddling problem. It's a very tricky thing but here's something you can do."

"But I thought you guys were cuddly sleepers," Gray mocked.

"NO!" Gajeel snarled. "Not cuddly. Never been cuddly. That's just Salamander and Bunny Girl, and the Shrimp. I'm like you. I need the space. Now come here." They sat on the sofa close up to one another as Gajeel had one arm behind Gray. "Right, you're in bed," Gray's eyes popped out when he noticed exactly where Gajeel's hand was, he could feel Gajeel's hand burning through the thin layer of his trouser leg (which thankfully he managed to keep on today), and the moment Gajeel also realised where his hand was he immediately yanked it away and jumped back a couple feet. "I'm going to use the effing cushion," he growled as he pulled the back cushion of Gray's sofa between them. "Right, you're in bed. She's on your side cuddling," Gajeel said hastily, "now you wait for her to drift off, and then you HUG her," he stressed as he squeezed the cushion tightly, "and then roll her onto her side of the bed," he rolled the cushion closer to Gray, his arm still round it, "and then you roll away." He pulled away from the cushion himself. "Hug for her," he hugged the cushion again, "roll for you," he pulled back once again. "Got it?"

"Got it."

"Good," Gajeel stood up and bushed his jeans, "now you ever mention this to anyone and I will murder you!"

"Don't worry," Gray muttered, "like I would ever tell people about you trying to make a move on me."

Gray barely ducked the punch Gajeel aimed at his face for that remark.

FTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFT

Fortunately Juvia forgave Gray for somehow accidentally calling her fat – he still didn't understand how he did it – and happily threw herself into his arms for a passionate kiss, and plenty more, before they ended up exhausted in bed, and Juvia was curled up against Gray's chest as his arms unwittingly wrapped themselves round her.

"Night, night Gray-sama," Juvia mumbled against his nipples, "Juvia cannot wait to see you in the morning."

"Night….Juvia."

Gray inwardly winced at his lack of a pet name, he was really rubbish at all this couple stuff which was horrific because Natsu could do it, so it can't be that hard, and then after a moment of utter silence, Juvia's deep, even, breathing being the only sound in the room, Gray's eyes began to drift to the other side of the bed.

Look at all that room on her side! He seethed to himself. You can fit a giant penguin over there! He frowned slightly at that. That would be weird though. He wondered briefly if Lucy's insane, over-active, imagination was contagious when Juvia suddenly started to drool against his chest and brought him back to his current situation. Hug and roll time! He thought firmly. I'm hugging, he squeezed Juvia tightly against him, I'm hugging, he slowly rolled her back onto the mattress, you're rolling aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand – yes! Juvia flopped onto the mattress, giving him a lot of actual breathing space, Freedom! Gray moved to lie back in his space only to find himself yanked back to Juvia as her lukewarm body was still draped over his arm. Except for this arm which is stuck. I've got a stuck arm. Gray took a deep breath. Right then, time for the table cloth trick, one quick fluid motion, quick like a cat, quick like a cat, quick like a cat, and one….two…..three…

Quickly, Gray yanked his arm out from beneath Juvia which, much to his everlasting horror, sent Juvia flying off the bed.

"EEK!"

THUMP!

"Oh my God!" Gray yelped. "I am so sorry!"

FTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFT

"Oh my God, Juvia!" Levy gasped, horrified at the sight of her friend with a sling. "What on earth happened to you?"

"Oh," Juvia flushed, "this is nothing. Gray-sama didn't mean to do this."

"What." Levy growled. "Did. He. Do?"

"Nothing terrible!" Juvia protested. "Gray-sama was just doing this hug and roll thing that Gajeel-kun had told him about and accidentally threw Juvia out of bed. It wasn't anything he did on purpose. Gray-sama would never hurt Juvia on purpose."

"…What hug and roll thing?" Levy asked suspiciously as she turned to look at her boyfriend who suddenly went white. She never heard of such a thing until now and she strongly suspected that Gajeel had been doing something he shouldn't. "Gajeel," she growled in her softest, most dangerous, voice, "what hug and roll thing?"

"Erm…" Gajeel sweated, "You see…."

An hour later Gray was not surprised to answer his door to a furious, bright red, Gajeel, who instantly sank his fist into Gray's gut. The half-naked man bent over and groaned at the painful sensation that caused.

"Here's something else you didn't know," Gajeel snarled furiously, "girls fucking talk!"