Summary: Inspired by an episode of Full House. Ur teases Nashi about giving her a New Year's Kiss…
Pairings: Nashi/Ur, Parental Natsu/Nashi, Parental Lucy/Nashi, Parental Mira/Nashi, Parental Cana/Nashi, Natsu/Lucy, Gray/Juvia, implied Bickslow/Lisanna, implied Gajeel/Levy, implied Elfman/Evergreen, implied Parental Gajeel/Gilly, Parental Juvia/Ur, and crack Cana/Freed.
YouTube Prompt: Crack, trailer mash-up, with 27 dresses. Any pairing.
"It's New Year's."
At this blunt observation, eight year old Nashi Dragneel raised a snarky eyebrow at her inferior, younger, guild mate, Ur Fullbuster. Despite her incredibly low opinion of him she knew he wasn't that dumb to make such an obvious statement and therefore she quickly jumped to the conclusion that he was up to something.
But she decided to play along regardless. After all she was stuck wearing a frilly dress that itched uncomfortably while all the adults were talking amongst themselves and drinking something that her mother said Nashi was not allowed to touch in a million years.
In other words she had nothing better to do than humour Ur.
"Is it?" she gasped melodramatically as she mockingly widened her eyes in shock. "I didn't know!"
"Yeah," Ur grinned, "well you always were rather stup-ouch!" he flinched when Nashi punched him in the arm….hard. His stormy eyes narrowed at her as he let out a little growl and reached out as if to throttle her. "Why you little-"
"Ah! Ah! Ah!" Nashi peddled back quickly as she wagged a finger at him chidingly. "Aunt Mira said no fighting remember!" she said with syrupy sweetness. "You have to be good!"
"So do you," Ur pointed out sulkily, "And you haven't."
Nashi grimaced at the fact that he was right. She hated it when he did that because he was such a smug git about it. However if she didn't admit it and apologise he was likely to tell Aunt Mira on her and then she won't get to stay up at Midnight like everyone else. "You're right," she choked out, "I'm sorry," she apologised a little more sincerely, "Better?"
"I'll forgive you," Ur said with a smug air about him. The git. "In fact I'm going to forgive you so much," he said in a loud, pompous, voice, "that I'm willing to do the New Year's tradition with you."
Nashi tiled her head sideways. "New Year's tradition?" she asked.
A smirk crossed his face and Nashi regretted asking instantly. "You don't know?" he asked in mock surprise. "I can't believe you don't know," he said with such exaggerated, annoying, surprise that Nashi was beginning to wish she just punched him the face and got into trouble. She wouldn't have to deal with this little performance that was purposely done to bug the hell out of her. "Wow," Ur sighed in fake awe, "You really do have a brain made from stardust."
"Spit it out Puddle-Brain!" Nashi snapped as she fought back an urge to throw a fireball for that particular comment.
The corners of Ur's lips twitched at that. "The tradition for New Year's is a kiss at midnight," he informed her solemnly, "and you," he pointed at her, "are getting one from me," he jabbed his thumbs into his chest to emphasis his point.
It took a moment for what he said to click in her brain and realisation to really sink in…..
"Ew!" Nashi balked. "I'm not kissing you!"
"Too bad," Ur smirked, "its tradition. You have to be kissed."
"Blergh!" Nashi gagged. "Over my dead body!"
Ur laughed, delighted that he had wound her up already, and then puckered his lips up as he made kissy noises by smacking his lips together. Nashi shuddered and immediately ran away from him which only made him laugh even louder.
"It's not true," she mumbled to herself, "it can't be true!" quickly she scanned the room for a reliable adult that would tell her the truth. Instantly she dismissed her parents, one word about kissing and she knows she'll end up locked in a tower with her father guarding her like the dragon he claims to be. He was ridiculously overprotective and what's worse her Mum totally encourages it. She couldn't ask certain other adults because most of them would instantly tell on her or accidentally repeat her question so loudly her Dad will hear. Her eyes landed on Aunt Cana who was drinking cheerfully at the bar and immediately a smile spread across her face. Aunt Cana always told the truth even when all the other grown-ups yelled at her not to. She'll give Nashi her answers. "Aunt Cana!" she squealed as she dashed up the drunken brunette and tugged at her sleeve.
"Hiya sweetie!" Aunt Cana slurred. "What's up?"
Aunt Cana," Nashi said breathless with anticipation, "do people kiss at Midnight?"
Please say no, please say no, please say no, Nashi silently begged as she clutched her hands in prayer, please say no, please say no, please sa-
"Oh crap!" Aunt Cana cursed. "I haven't found someone to kiss!"
Nashi's jaw dropped open in horror. "You mean it's real?!" she squealed. "Ur isn't lying?!"
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! She inwardly screamed. That meant she was definitely going to get a yucky, slobbery, kiss from Ur Fullbuster….she shuddered at the mental image.
"Hold on, kid," Aunt Cana said as she ruffled Nashi's hair. Nashi grumbled slightly it mussed up hair and made her ribbon slip to the side slightly. "You!" Aunt Cana barked as she grabbed Uncle Freed by the collar of his jacket. "You are kissing me at midnight, kapeesh?"
"But-"
"I said," Aunt Cana growled, "kapeesh?"
"Kapeesh."
"Excellent," Aunt Cana said smugly as she released Uncle Freed (who whimpered pathetically), "now then, now I have my kiss all sorted out how can I help you get yours Nashi? Nashi? Oi, Nashi?!"
Nashi had vanished at this point. It had become clear that Aunt Cana was not going to help her get out of her kissing problem. In fact Aunt Cana would probably throw her at Ur as apparently it was the rules to kiss at Midnight….
But she didn't want to kiss Ur!
Which was why twenty minutes before Midnight, Aunt Mira found her hiding under the bar eating an onion. She paused in the middle of pouring out the champagne for all the adults as she eyed Nashi with dry amusement. "Nashi," she said calmly, "what are you doing?"
"Eating onions," Nashi bit into a raw onion and forced herself to chew. It was all so terribly disgusting but if it made her breath stink terribly then Ur might just pass out before he put his lips anywhere near her.
"I can see," Aunt Mira replied, "why?"
"I need my breath to be as disgusting as possible," Nashi said solemnly. She peered over the bar and caught Ur's eye almost instantly. His face lit up with malicious glee as he once again puckered up his lips. She immediately ducked down again and stared at her onion….it wasn't enough. "Maybe I should also eat some garlic," she mumbled to herself.
"And why," Aunt Mira sounded like she was trying not to laugh, "Do you need your breath to be as disgusting as possible?"
"Ur wants to kiss me at Midnight," Nashi confessed.
"Oh my!" Aunt Mira gasped as she placed a hand over her heart. "Kids these days start so young!"
"IT'S NOT LIKE THAT AT ALL!"
Aunt Mira giggled. "If you really want to get back at him," she said as she poured out more champagne, "then you should really give him a taste of his own medicine. It'll freak him out if you turn the tables on him."
"You're right," Nashi nodded, "I need to eat another onion so Ur gets just what he deserves."
For some reason this just made Aunt Mira laugh even more but Nashi ignored her as she focused on forcing herself to eat two more raw onions before the music died down and the countdown to Midnight began.
"TEN!"
Nashi reluctantly climbed out from beneath the bar as everyone around her was shouting as loudly and joyfully as they could.
"NINE!"
She grimaces when she catches Ur's delighted eye across the room.
"EIGHT!"
Her parents were in a corner, her father's arms were wrapped round her mother's waist as they screamed childishly in each other's faces.
"SEVEN!"
Ur's parents were nearby and it looked as if Uncle Gray couldn't move at all as Aunt Juvia clung to him tightly, a blissful look of sheer happiness on her face. Nashi felt sorry for her, she obviously had no idea what a pain her son really was.
"SIX!"
All the other adults were pairing off as well. The married couples looking at each other in a really revolting lovey-dovey way while all the newer ones were nervously edging towards one another (apart from Uncle Freed who was trying to crawl away from Aunt Cana).
"FIVE!"
Gilly was no help either, she had fallen asleep in Uncle Gajeel's arms and a book stuck to her chest, while Edward was hovering near his own parents looking unnaturally well-behaved for a Fairy Tail child.
"FOUR!
Nashi gathered up all of her courage and crossed the room towards Ur.
"THREE!"
Ur's smirk was now insufferable and Nashi wondered if she could get away with sinking her fist into it while all the adults were kissing.
"TWO!"
Suddenly her heart was hammering, her hands were sweaty, and Nashi felt rather sick to her stomach. She thinks just thinking about kissing Ur has given her the flu. She always knew Ur would make her sick but this was rather ridiculous!
"ONE!"
They met each other half way the make-shift dancefloor. Ur looking smug, calm, and entirely too pleased with himself while Nashi probably looked like she was going to murder someone – preferably Ur – and a little bit constipated.
"HAPPY NEW YEAR!"
All the adults were now kissing, some sweetly like Aunt Lisanna and Uncle Bickslow and Uncle Gajeel and Aunt Levy, and some disgustingly passionate like Nashi's own parents (oh blee!) and Uncle Elfman and Aunt Evergreen. Poor Uncle Freed looked like he was having his lungs stolen by Aunt Cana's tongue…..urgh.
"Okay," Nashi breathed in deeply as she gathered all of her Fairy Tail courage, "Let's get this thing over and done with."
"Ha!" Ur barked out joyfully. "Pfft!" he snorted. "Oh my God! You actually thought I was going to kiss you!" he sniggered. Nashi felt her cheeks heat up with humiliation as he pointed at her and laughed. "Priceless! You idiot!" he snickered. "As if I would ever ki-HMMPH!"
Furious at being teased, taunted, and then thoroughly embarrassed like she had been tonight, as well as feeling strangely disappointed, and Aunt Mira's words still ringing in her head, Nashi had completely snapped and grabbed hold of Ur's cheeks before she pulled him in and mashed their lips together.
The kiss was long, deep, and passionate, just as she remembered reading in one of the books Gilly had lent her a while back. She wasn't really entirely sure she was doing it right, it certainly felt clumsy and awkward and a bit slimy rather than how it was actually described in the books, but she really didn't care. The longer and more disgusting the kiss was the more likely Ur was feeling tormented and punished.
She pulled back when she needed to breathe and let Ur go so quickly that he staggered back onto the floor with a stunned expression on his face.
He wasn't the only one.
The whole guild was staring at them, jaws dropped open, eyes wide as possible, and her father looking particularly murderous as his glass had gone up in flames completely.
"Nashi!" her Mum gasped. "Where on earth did you learn to kiss like that?!"
"And who do I have to murder?" her Dad growled.
Before Nashi could answer those awkward questions, Ur snapped back into reality, and immediately his face crumpled into disgusted despair.
"Mummy!" he wailed as he ran to Aunt Juvia. "I've been violated!"
Nashi cackled delightedly. Victory was hers….
(It didn't feel like a victory seven years later when she's preparing for her first date and Aunt Mira slyly points out, while she had been busy freaking out having her first kiss that night, that Nashi already had her first kiss and it had been with Ur! It's so bloody typical that he finds a way to ruin everything….)