Bradley's day at work began like any other: he greeted the humans in the hallway, had a pot of tea sent to his office and relaxed in his desk chair until it arrived. However, it was anything but an ordinary day for him. Mrs. Bradley had a woman's social gathering to attend and she had asked her husband to look after their son for a day. In her eyes, Selim was too young to stay home all day alone, even though the help would be there. It was following this excuse, she admitted she really wished the boy's father would take him to work.
"You two need to spend more time bonding, you know?"
"Yes," Bradley agreed with a slight smile. "I understand."
"I can't have the two of you bickering all the time," his wife noted. "And trust me, I have heard plenty of arguments in this house the past two weeks. To think Selim would take back to his father, but you. You should be far more mature than to argue with a child."
"I am sorry, dear. It is merely that he knows exactly how to irritate me."
"Don't be sorry," Mrs. Bradley huffed. "Take him to work and out to lunch. Show him you love him, dear."
"I will…" Bradley wished he could scowl, but knew that would only make his wife more upset. "And don't worry your pretty head about me and Selim. We'll have fun. Promise."
"Wonderful," Mrs. Bradley gave him a kiss and left the dining room to go read a book before bed.
After she was gone, Bradley glanced at the shadow on the wall of the dining room with a skeptical glance. "We said we would have fun, isn't that right, Pride?"
"Yes, I suppose," A cold voice replied, "But I chose where we eat lunch."
"Fair, fair."
"And you can't just leave me in your office all day, or I'm telling mama."
"Again, fair. I will make sure you are always at my side."
"Good. And I better have fun." And that is what Bradley tried to do once the tea arrived. Instead of his usual order, he sent out for some cookies as well. Pride may have been centuries older than him, but Bradley knew he had a sweet tooth.
"Thank you, Father!" the little pest cried as the plate of cookies was set down next to the tea in the seating area of the office. "These look yummy!"
"Anything to have fun," Bradley laughed, only to sneeze. "And it seems as though spring is-"
Another sneeze.
"Are you okay, Father?" Selim asked, looking over at him with false concern. If anything, Bradley knew that he must have been annoying his older brother.
"Yes, dear. I am fine…." Bradley muttered, using his silk handkerchief to wipe his uncovered eye. But that was a mistake. The itchy feeling only began to spread and Bradley sneezed again. "Sorry, allergi-"
His son glanced toward the doors of the office. "Stop sneezing already. You're embarrassing yourse-"
Bradley wished he could obey, but his nose was as itchy as his eyes- the itch having spread to the other, which made it all the worse. He couldn't remove his eye-patch at work, so all he could do was try to poke and rub the itch. Before he knew it, the patch he carefully tied every morning slipped off his face and Bradley watched it fall to the ground.
Should have seen that coming…
He frowned and glanced up at his son, only to be blinded by a collection of flashing lights. A second later, the office door burst open.
"And here I thought someone was pulling my leg!" Colonel Roy Mustang's voice echoed loudly as he walked inside the office followed by far too many footsteps. "When they said you were a homunculus, I didn't believe it, but now we have all we need to get to the bottom of this mess."
"What?" Selim sounded too shocked to say anything more.
"And to think, this was all possible because of one little cat! Haha!"
A/N: I know it's been years, but I DO come back to fandoms! Possibly 2 more chapters left. I am glad you are all enjoying this crack fic.