What if Duncan didn't quit in World Tour?
Walk Like an Egyptian - Part 2
Cody: Where's Gwen? N-N-Not like I care, just curious.
Gwen: I'm telling you, we need to untie!
Courtney: And I'm telling you it's unsafe! I'm in charge, and-
Chris: (through megaphone) Oh, kids! (Musical ding) Recognize that sound? It's time for whoever's not finished yet to give us a little musical reprise!
Duncan: You said one song per episode!
Chris: (through megaphone) Yeah, and this is a reprise! Not a new song. So, if you don't sing, you're out! Now let's hear it!
Duncan: You know what? No. No no no no no no no. Three hours of these two squawking on this stupid pyramid in this stupid heat, and you want me to sing? Forget it!
Chris: Dude, you have a contract.
Duncan: Eat it, McLean! If you need me, I'll be on the plane waiting for a ride home because I'm out! Done! I quit!
Chris: Wait! (sigh) Fine. You don't have to sing anymore, but this rule only applies to Duncan!
Duncan: That's better.
Owen: Izzy, no!
Noah: You're carrying the undead!
Izzy: Cool! Bite me and I can be your undead friend like Frankenstein.
Ezekiel: Thanks for all the help, you knobs.
Chris: Izzy, go join team-
Harold: Talata, or three.
Ezekiel: Come on, guy. After all this, you gotta let me back in the game.
Chris: Nope! You are never competing again.
Ezekiel: What?! No way! What am I gonna do!
Chris: Make like you're taking the drop of shame and figure it out yourself! Okay, teams! Talk amongst yourselves and determine a team name. You have three minutes while I enjoy this ice cream cone.
Team Victory: Team Victory!
Duncan wanted a different name, but he was out voted 3-2.
Team Amazon: Team Amazon!
The other contestants had their own ideas and didn't agree to any name. Until Sierra blurted out
Sierra: Got it! Team Chris is Really, Really, Really, Really Hot!
Alejandro, Tyler, Noah, and Owen: What?
Chris: All right, best team name ever!
{Time skip}
The Am-AH-Zon Race
Sierra: Well, you did lead us to disaster, but uh, I'll join you guys in the vote for Heather too. On one condition. You have to stop being so nice to Cody.
Gwen: If it means Heather is finally gone, you've got a deal.
At the elimination room.
Heather: Oh great. It's Pirate Pablo.
Alejandro: Ah, Heather. Cheer up. Your departure will make the game a whole lot easier for me.
Heather: I know you messed with Leshawna. And Bridgette too, probably. You are just lucky you didn't try anything on me.
Alejandro: Ah. But with the temptation of a kiss, even you couldn't resist me forever.
Heather: I... would... have... crushed you!
Chris: All right, Amazons. Are you ready to find out who you chose to eliminate? Whatcha think, Cody? You give that a big, fat thumbs up? Let's take a look at who you all voted for. Just for fun.
(Confessionals: Team Amazon)
Gwen: I vote for Heather. And Chris, there's ten dollars in it if you forget to give her a parachute.
Courtney: Goodbye, Heather. Wow. Feels too good to be true.
Heather: I vote Gwen.
Sierra: I vote for Heather. (giggles) I used to say that in my bathroom mirror all the time. And now, here I am doing it. Ah! This is so awesome!
Cody: I... vote for Sierra. She's like the stalker girlfriend I always thought I wanted... until I got one.
Duncan: This is a tough design, but I vote for Heather. Sorry Cody, but Sierra can wait.
(Confessionals: Off)
Chris: There. All done.
(Confessional: Sierra)
Sierra: He voted... for me? President of his fan club? After all I've done for him? Foot rubs, secret hair collection, I mean, it's just so... Cody! (cries)
(Confessional: Off)
Heather: Let's just get this over with.
Chris: I guess this would be a good time to watch Heather fall out of the plane, you know, if this had actually been an elimination round. But it's not. (Party blower) Surprise! (Gwen and Cody gasp)
Heather: Now they fear me. And so, they should. I will make them all pay for what they tried to do to me, and then... I'll crush Alejandro for dessert!
Cody- Voted for Sierra
Courtney- Voted for Heather
Duncan- Voted for Heather
Gwen- Voted for Heather
Heather- Voted for Gwen
Sierra- Voted for Heather
(4 Heather) (1 Gwen and Sierra)
NON-ELIMINATION
I See London...
Chris: Since Team Amazon brought me nothing, Team ME wins!
Owen and Noah breathe a sigh of relief.
Chris: Team Amazon, I'll be seeing you at the elimination ceremony.
(Confessional: Duncan)
Duncan: Gah! I don't know what to do! I have no interest in Courtney, but if I break up with her, she'll either hit me where it hurts or make me like her again! What do I do?
(Confessional: Off)
At the elimination room.
Chris: And with three votes against her... Heather! It's time to say tally-ho. Pip-pip. Cheerio. Too-de-loo!
Heather: Ugh, if I jump, will you stop?
(Elimination music)
Cody- Voted for Sierra
Courtney- Voted for Heather
Duncan- Voted for Courtney (What a way to break up then to eliminate her.)
Gwen- Voted for Heather
Heather- Voted for Sierra
Sierra- Voted for Heather
(3 Heather) (2 Sierra) (1 Courtney)
Eliminated: Heather
Greece's Pieces
Gwen: Here, boar, boar, boar!
Noah: No luck?
Gwen: Nah.
Noah: Hey. Now that I can ask, is there something wrong? You seemed off lately. (Musical ding)
Chris: Time for a song. Please continue. This time with music. (Mandolin plays)
Noah: What's going on? With you?
Gwen: I'm not the only one, but that is true!
Noah: Of course I am. I was almost gone.
I really feel like a pawn.
Gwen: Let's keep this between us!
Noah: Can't do that. Hadn't told what's up.
Gwen: Ok maybe. I was hoping. Of the downfall of a certain ladyyyyyyyyyyy!
Owen: They have such good voices.
Sierra: I can't make out the lyrics.
Courtney: SPEAK UP!
Chris: Shush!
Noah: Ok it sounds like you dooooon't care.
Gwen: Save it for later. Look out for that bear!
(Noah screams)
Noah: The pain, the pain. Too much to explain.
Gwen: Gotta stop what we're doing because this is just insane!
Noah: The boar bear's got me. And that's seriously lame.
Gwen: Thanks, Mr. Boar Bear. I guess I win this game.
Courtney: Nice one, Gwen.
They high five.
Gwen and Courtney: Yes!
{Like it? Obviously, Duncan and Gwen are on the same team. Ergo, Noah volunteers instead. Why? Well, in order to stay in the game, he needs to contribute and win. Meaning that Noah and Gwen have their duet.}
Chris: So, here we are. Let's look at why. Tyler volunteered for and lost the tie breaker, which is why we're all here. Plus, he got TKO'd by a girl. Funny? Yes. But not helpful. Alejandro blew it in the hurdles, which forced the tie breaker, which is why you're all here. Plus, he knocked himself out cold trying to out-man a girl. All this while his hair was in a ponytail.
Alejandro: What does my hair have to do-
Chris: And Noah, he lost his first challenge. Which help influence the choice is pretty clear. But today, the final choice is mine. And the Drop of Shame will be taken by...
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Chris: This intern!
Said intern gets pushed off the plane. Good thing he has a parachute.
Chris: That's right. I'm ignoring the vote. As if I'm gonna have a tiebreaker when the episode's almost over.
Alejandro- Voted for Noah
Noah- Voted for Alejandro
Owen- Voted for Alejandro
Tyler- Voted for Noah
NON-ELIMINATION
The EX-Files
Noah: (Sigh) What do you want?
Alejandro: What? Not happy to see me?
Noah: Cut the crap! I know that we're gonna have a tiebreaker scenario.
Alejandro: Then let's cut a deal.
Noah: What?
Alejandro: Vote off Owen and I will spare you and vote Tyler next.
Noah: What?!
Alejandro: As much as I don't like you, I hate Owen more. Vote for him and maybe you can make it to the merge.
Noah: Hmm... I'll think about it...
Alejandro: Good.
{This time, Tyler is injured a little too much.}
Chris: Team Chris is Really, Really, Really, Really Hot, not a lot of teamwork going on tonight. Owen, wasting time on a new hairdo? Not cool. Noah, making deals before you help your teammate? That's low. Tyler...
Tyler: Is stoked that Noah is outie.
Chris: No Tyler, you're outie.
(Elimination music)
Tyler and Alejandro: What?
Alejandro- Voted for Owen
Noah: Voted for Alejandro
Owen- Voted for Tyler
Tyler- Voted for Tyler (With Noah here, obviously he can't help a lot with the alien that electrocuted Tyler. So he loses enough brain cells to match Lindsay's. Aww. ❤)
(2 Tyler) (1 Alejandro and Owen)
Eliminated: Tyler
Picnic at Hanging Dork
Courtney: Ok, Duncan, we need to discuss who to vote for.
Duncan: Do we?
Courtney: Yes! Ok. Gwen is out of the question.
Duncan: Since you guys are friends.
Courtney: Which leaves Sierra and Cody.
Duncan: We should vote Cody.
Courtney: No dice. Gwen wouldn't vote him off. Meaning we vote Siera. Cody would vote for her anyway.
Duncan: Fine.
Cut to the elimination room
Chris: It's been a tough day for many of you. But one of you is about to have the worst day of all. Sierra, last to arrive, first to get injured. Courtney, slow with the emu, quick with the flirting. Gwen, not your most focused performance. And Duncan. Courtney? Really? Cody, you seem to be the safest one here. Let the voting begin! Cody! You're up first!
(Confessionals: Team Amazon)
Cody sadly stamps Sierra's passport.
Courtney stamps Sierra's passport.
Duncan starches his head, but his vote isn't shown.
Gwen stamps a passport. It's unknown who.
Sierra stamps Courtney's passport, but it's hard since she has a broken arm.
(Confessionals: Off)
Chris: Okay, one vote for Courtney. One for Sierra. A second for Courtney. A second for Sierra. And the last vote is for... Sierra.
Sierra: What?!
Cody: Yes!
Cody- Voted for Sierra
Courtney- Voted for Sierra
Duncan- Voted for Courtney
Gwen- Voted for Sierra
Sierra- Voted for Courtney
(3 Sierra) (2 Courtney)
Eliminated: Sierra
Sweden Sour
Chris: Ah, the elimination room. This is where one of you will be tossed into the darkness to plummet out of my life and possibly to the end of your own. And if this weren't a reward challenge, that would happen tonight. Psych! No vote tonight! You're all safe! For now.
Courtney: Yes!
Chris: Yes, sirree. As we speak, Team Perfect Me is getting their reward. Swedish massages performed by a genuine registered massage therapists.
Team Amazon: Aw...
Cody- Voted for Courtney
Courtney- Voted for Cody
Duncan- Voted for Courtney
Gwen- Didn't vote
(2 Courtney) (1 Cody)
NON-ELIMINATION
Niagara Brawls
Chris: So, Niagara Falls is pretty awesome, eh?
Noah: It almost killed us!
Chris: Like I said, awesome. The Falls is the jewel in Canada's crown, and one of the top ten natural wonders in the world. It's also known for its fabulous casino, which is where we'll be heading for the first part of the challenge!
Duncan: Oh, man, seriously?!
Later.
Duncan: Seriously?
Chris: Since you're all underage, we had to move the challenge from the gambling floor to the far less exciting casino concert hall.
Owen: Ooh, I wonder if anyone's performing!
Chris: You're in luck, Owen, my man. Last time on the Aftermath show, they had a Second Chance Challenge, where one of the losers could score a spot back in the game. And we're about to enjoy a little number from the winner.
Cody: Please let it not be Sierra.
Chris: She's two hundred pounds of sassy in a ninety-pound package and she's probably wearing twelve pounds of mascara. It's... Heather.
Alejandro: ¿Qué?
Courtney: What?
Heather: I'm not signing! Ugh! I don't want to be on this show!
Chirs: Too bad. Now sing!
{I couldn't come up with lyrics. Sorry.}
Chris: Duncan and Courtney have immunity. Everyone else is fair game. What's it gonna be?
After voting.
Chris: Interesting. Really? Huh. Who'd've thought? Wow. (chuckles)
Heather: Read them already!
Chris: Okay, okay. Hold on to your halter top. One vote for Alejandro. Three votes for Heather.
Heather: What?!
Chris: And four votes... for... Owen!
Owen: What? Me?
Chris: Owen, the gang has spoken.
(Elimination music)
Owen: Oh, okay. Well, I'll miss you guys.
Duncan: Smell you later, man.
Alejandro: I am weeping. On the inside.
Owen: You can't do it on the outside, Al? Just a little? I'd like that. Al? Al? Al! Al?
[Paired with Heather] Alejandro- Voted for Owen
[Paired with Noah] Cody- Voted for Owen (Without Sierra around, Cody is more willing to trust Alejandro.)
Null [Paired with Duncan] Courtney- Voted for Owen
Null [Paired with Courtney] Duncan- Voted for Heather
[Paired with Owen] Gwen- Voted for Heather
[Paired with Alejandro] Heather- Voted for Owen
[Paired with Cody] Noah- Voted for Alejandro
[Paired with Gwen] Owen- Voted for Heather
(4 Owen) (3 Heather) (1 Alejandro)
Eliminated: Owen
Chinese Fake-Out
Chris: Okay! You have to eat each bowl of delish food, opening your mouth to prove it went down. If you're last to finish or you puke, you go sit with Courtney on the loser bench.
Courtney: I am a CIT, I am not a loser.
Cody: What is it?
(Musical ding)
Chris: Allow me to begin today's number
A little Chinese lesson for you
Manman chi means "Enjoy your meal"
Alejandro, Cody, Duncan, Gwen, Heather, and Noah: Manman chi, it's no raw deal
Cody: I-Is it roasted eel?
Chris: It's donkey meat. Local delicacy.
Cody: Ace! Where are you? Fart if you can hear me!
Alejandro: Dropped something. Done!
Gwen: Done!
Heather: Done.
Duncan: It's a bacon double cheeseburger. A bacon double cheeseburger.
Heather: Hurry, Cody!
Cody: I can't eat Ace.
Duncan: Done!
Noah: Gross. Done!
Chris: Cody, you're out! Loser bench.
(Cody groans)
Chris: Manman chi means bon appetit
Alejandro, Duncan, Gwen, Heather, and Noah: Manman chi, what do we have to eat?
Heather: It's still moving its feet! It's hundreds and hundreds of disgusting little feet!
Chris: Live mealworms. Local delicacy.
Alejandro: Oops. My hair tie fell. Done!
Duncan: Done!
Gwen: Done!
Noah: Done!
Chris: Heather, you're out. Loser bench.
Heather vomits on Chris
Chris: Manman chi, it's dinner for four
Alejandro, Duncan, Gwen, and Noah: Manman chi, we've got room for more
Noah: I think I'm nearly done for.
Chris: Starfish on a skewer! Local delicacy!
Alejandro: I don't know why I'm having such hair tie problems today. Done!
Duncan: Bacon... bacon...
Gwen: Done!
Duncan: Done!
Chris: Noah, you're out! Loser bench!
Noah: You're having a snack while you watch this? You are sick!
Chris: Yeah. We don't even know what that's called. It ain't right, whatever it is. Manman chi, don't get the squirts
Alejandro, Gwen, and Duncan: Manman chi, we'd rather eat our shirts
Heather: Wait, stop!
(phone rings theme song)
Chris: Listen, man!
Heather: Why does Alejandro keep bending over while he's eating?
Noah: I got a better question. Why does Courtney keep chewing back here?
Courtney: I do not!
Alejandro: You have a little something...
Heather: Chris, what are you going to do about all this crazy cheating?
Chris: Yeah, okay. Budget, blah blah blah. What am I supposed to do?
Heather: Get off the phone and host the flipping show! Alejandro is slipping his food back to Courtney!
Alejandro: It is a lie!
Courtney: So not true!
Chris: Listen, we gotta wrap this up. So, here's the dealio. One last round, whoever wins has invincibility in tonight's vote and they get to take the person of their choice up to first class with them.
Heather: At least move Courtney away from Alejandro!
Chris: Fine. Courtney, put this on to prove you can keep your mouth shut.
Courtney: This is ridiculous.
Chris: Let's get this done.
Alejandro, Duncan, and Gwen: Manman chi, manman chi
Chris: They love to eat on the Yangtze
Manman chi, manman... huh?
Alejandro and Duncan vomits while Gwen chows down the food.
Gwen: Courtney's in first class with me! Since I won immunity!
Chris: Heather, Courtney, Heather, Courtney, Alejandro, Heather. And the final vote goes to... Courtney. It's a tie!
Courtney: Prepare to go down Heather!
(Phone ring)
Chris: The producer's breathing down my neck and I'm getting a lot of flak on this budget stuff, so I was thinking, why don't you both take off?
Heather and Courtney: What?!
Courtney: How is getting rid of me going to save money?
Chris: Weight on the plane, food budget, I dunno. You're just both really annoying me.
Duncan: Hey Courtney!
Courtney: What? Wanna goodbye kiss?
Duncan: No. I want to end this.
Courtney: What?!
Duncan runs to Gwen and … Well, you can imagine what he does.
Courtney: Prepare to hear from my lawyers! And Duncan, prepare for a personal defamation lawsuit while I'm at it.
Duncan: Buh-bye.
Alejandro- Voted for Heather
Cody- Voted for Courtney
Courtney- Voted for Heather
Duncan- Voted for Courtney
Null Gwen- Voted for Heather
Heather- Voted for Courtney
Noah- Voted for Alejandro
(3 Heather and Courtney) (1 Alejandro)
Eliminated: Heather and Courtney
African Lying Safari
Chris: Mm. Tension-y. All righty then. Noah and Duncan are the only ones to receive votes.
Chef throws the peanut barf bags at the remaining contestants.
Chris: And the lucky loser is...
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Chris: Noah!
Noah: Kinda expected that... At least I no longer have to compEEEEAAAAAAAAA-
Chris: Now, Alejandro, who you bringing to the big leagues?
Alejandro: Do I have to pick someone?
Chris: Yes.
Alejandro: Fine. Cody.
Null Alejandro- Voted for Noah
Cody- Voted for Duncan
Duncan- Voted for Noah
Gwen- Voted for Noah
Noah- Voted for Duncan
Rapa Phooey!
Gwen: So, just to be clear, we're voting for Alejandro?
Duncan: Well, you don't wanna vote for Cody, right?
Gwen: Yeah.
Chris: And it's time to vote! The first person to be nominated for the Drop of Shame is... Alejandro. Next vote, Cody. Next vote, Duncan. And the fourth and final vote says this week's loser is... Alejandro.
Alejandro: ¡¿Qué?!
Chris: But you can shut off the waterworks, because you're all still in the final four! It was just a reward challenge!
Gwen: What? Seriously?!
Chris: Heather... because you won, your prize awaits you in first class, and as usual, you can bring the loser of your choice.
Duncan: Gwen.
Alejandro- Voted for Cody
Cody- Voted for Duncan Null
Null Duncan- Voted for Alejandro
Gwen- Voted for Alejandro
(2 Alejandro) (1 Cody and Duncan Null)
NON-ELIMINATION
Awwwwww, Drumheller
Chris: I've got a little season one tribute treat for you. Remember, Alejandro has invincibility, so there better not be any votes against him. So, Alejandro, you get tonight's first marshmallow. Tonight's second marshmallow goes to... Gwen, who also had no votes against her. Let's read the remaining votes, just for a little suspenseful fun. The first vote goes to... Duncan. One for Cody. Another one for Duncan. And the last vote goes to...
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Chris: Cody. Ok time for a tiebreaker. Since Cody gave up on finding his barrel, whoever finds his barrel first wins!
Cody: But it's the middle of the night!
Chris: Which is why you get these!
He tosses them night vision goggles.
Chris: Now, go!
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A few moments later...
Chris: Cody wins! Duncan is out!
Null Alejandro- Voted for Duncan
Cody- Voted for Duncan
Duncan- Voted for Cody
Gwen- Voted for Cody
(2 Duncan and Cody)
Eliminated: Duncan
Geoff and Bridgette: Who you gonna root for?
Who's it gonna be?
Is it Heather, Gwen [Again], or will you pick Cody?
Alternate endings and such.
Bridgette: There's Heather, she's an ice queen
But she's been playing hard
Geoff: Too bad everybody hates her
She'd have to pay a bodyguard
Geoff and Bridgette: Who you gonna root for?
Who's it gonna be?
Is it Heather, Gwen [Again], or will you pick Cody?
Harold: Ricki-ticki-ti, you're gonna hear it from me
The only one winning this is C-O-D
Pimpin' like a king, sippin' lemonade in the shade
Kickin' it Hawaiian style
Gonna take home the cheddar
We're gonna be all smiles
Shawty!
Courtney: Hey, how come he gets to sing?
Geoff: He doesn't. Harold!
Harold: Ricki-ticki-ticki-tody
Give it up for my man Cody
Harold's in the house spittin' rhymes like a roadie
A roadie
Courtney: Gwen's a boyfriend stealer!
Harold: (rapping) Ricki-tick, whoa!
Courtney: Duncan's a dead man!
Harold: (rapping) Ricki-tick, oh, no!
Geoff: Cut! stop the music! I like a party as much as the next guy, but Harold, I gotta draw the line. This is confiscated!
It's the end again. Sorry if this is bad, but I have a good reason why this took so long! I'm actually working on a Total Drama what if!
You: What else is new?
Now hold on! Before you lose interest, it's actually gonna be its own story! What is the what if? I can't really tell you yet! Spoilers! But just know, in the words of factory reset Pearl, "Something is clearly wrong."
But what I can tell you is that the last three episodes won't be included. Because I didn't know how to write a good ending to it. Sorry. The next what if on this story should be about Ezekiel. Not one of my favorites, but I gotta give what the people want!