Summary: Inspired by Friends. Natsu really loves jam…
Pairings: Natsu/Mira friendship, Natsu/Jam, crack implied Erza/Lucy, crack implied Natsu/Gray/Gajeel/Laxus, Cana/Mira friendship, and implied Natsu/Lucy.
Author's Note: Thank you all for giving me over ELEVEN THOUSAND AND NINE HUNDRED reviews!
Natsu was never known for his sweet tooth.
Lucy has seen him devour all sorts of meat from roasted to fried and he has been equally piggish about a seafood. He doesn't seem to be all that bothered either way about vegetables or fruit, but he enjoyed a lot of other food as well.
Just not sweet stuff.
That was until one day Mirajane firmly placed a gigantic jar of jam in front of Natsu randomly.
"Is that….?" Natsu asked dazedly as drool began to run down his chin. Mira smiled as she nodded her answer. "You said you quit making jam!"
"I did," Mira replied, "you were eating faster than I could make it. It was exhausting but I stumbled upon a blackberry bush and the urge just came over me."
"YOU'RE THE BEST!" Natsu bellowed. He then snatched up the nearest spoon and dived it and his hand into the sticky, dark, purple, jam before he shovelled it into his mouth. "Mmmm…." Natsu moaned as his eyes rolled into the back of his head. "Oh, Mma mms mmmma mor!" he cried out ecstatically with his mouth full as he waved his jam covered spoon and hand excitedly.
"Wow," Lucy said in a mix of awe and disgust, "I never thought you'd like jam. Sweet stuff isn't exactly your favourite."
"But Lucy," Happy blinked, "who do you think it was that kept eating your jam at home?"
"Honestly?" Lucy fidgeted nervously as she glanced anxiously over her shoulder. Everyone followed her gaze to see Erza minding her own business as she polishes her sword. Suddenly aware (thanks to her keen warrior senses) that people are staring at her, Erza looks up baffled. "You know!" Lucy said hastily. "Because jam is a filling for the Victoria sponge cake!"
"Lucy!" Erza cried out aghast. "I would never do anything as dishonourable as putting my fingers in your jam pot!"
"Pfft!" Cana snorted.
Macao, Wakaba, and several other notably perverted members suddenly choked on their drinks as well.
"Please," Lucy sweat-dropped, "never say that again."
There is an awkward silence as Erza frowns in bewilderment, the more perverted members were trying to prevent nosebleeds, and the more innocent members were all blushing to death.
And Natsu was just gorging himself on jam.
"All right!" Cana said loudly as she slammed her hands onto the bar and leaned closer to Natsu. "Natsu I have to know," she held up one hand "….defeating Gray, Gajeel, and Laxus all at once," and then she held up her other hand up, "….or a big pot of jam?"
Natsu swallowed and put his sticky hands together. "Put them together," he grinned, "I shall enjoy my victory in a big pot of jam."
"THE FUCK?!"
Natsu didn't even have a chance to blink when suddenly Gray, Gajeel, and Laxus simultaneously punched him. Lucy could only watch in horror as Natsu flew across the room and went right through the wall.
The only noise in the guild (aside from the wall crumbling) was Cana cackling hysterically over the bar.
Then Natsu suddenly leaped back in, his body alit with flames, and a brawl instantly broke out (unsurprisingly).
"Every time," Mira sighed as she shook her head sorrowfully, "every time I make jam…."
"Heh!" Cana smirked. "It's not my fault that Natsu doesn't think before he speaks."
"You're the one that eggs him on!"
"I'm not the one that makes it so easy though!"
As Mira and Cana lightly bickered at whose fault it was for the brawl, Lucy eyed the homemade jam with a new insight to what it could be used for.
Fortunately no one noticed her blush at the perverted thoughts that invaded her mind.