Thor heads to Nidavellir with Rocket and Groot, leaving Loki with the rest of the crew of the Milano. Loki doesn't like being without his brother and he finds this rather funny. After all the time separated from Thor, all the distance he's tried to put between them, now that they've seen the destruction of Asgard and the massacre of their people, as well as nearly been killed themselves, it seems all the more important to stay together. But Thor has to stop Thanos and the way to do that is with Eitri and his great forge.
Loki stays within earshot of the console, trying to listen for the monitors scanning space to indicate they've found Sleipnir, but they are alarmingly quiet. His heart sinks farther the longer they stay silent.
Mantis sits beside him, "You've used much of your strength to heal your brother, but you won't rest. Why?"
"Because I don't want to not be here if you need help identifying my ship. And if I sleep, I might dream, and there are far too many distressing things that appear in my dreams," Loki answers.
"About Thanos?"
He nods, "Yes. And other things. But many of them relate to Thanos."
"He is a terrible being," she says, "I don't know how we can defeat him. I'm not a fighter. I'm an empath. I feel thoughts and can calm emotions. I don't think I'll be much use in battle. But I have to try," she replies. "Would you let me ease your mind? Give you some rest?"
"I can't miss if the scanners find my ship." He holds out his hand and projects a little illusion of it hovering above his palm, "It only has room enough in it for two, really. The sides open like wings, but one of them can also be opened only at the bottom as a sliding hatch for docking." He rotates the little vessel and pushes a small hatch aside with his finger, "Like that."
"I can listen for you," Mantis offers, "But you won't be much good to anyone if you can't restore yourself. You will need to be rested before joining Thor at the forge, won't you? But your voice still sounds raw from the cold. If you can't rest, how will you fight alongside him once you both have your weapons?"
Loki sighs, "Not just the cold," he whispers, "Thanos strangled me – he thinks he cut off my breath and snapped my neck – it took so much to survive it. I don't want to fight him, but you're right. If I have to..." He makes the little ship in his palm disappear and then drops his face into his hands, "How does one rest through all this? In such a short time – a few weeks – I lost my father, discovered I had a sister, fought my sister, landed on an alien planet, forged an alliance with the leader there, had a bit of trouble, was left behind, rescued what was left of Asgard's people, fought my sister again, had to trigger the destruction of my home planet by releasing a fire demon in order to destroy my sister..." He sits up and turns to her, "And then when we thought we had time to relearn how to be brothers, what was left of our nation safe in flight...he shows up and we have so little time to save them...so many dead, and among them, one of the few people I can say I truly admired, even when I fought against him. How do I rest?"
She brushes her fingers on his temple, "Will you let me help?" she asks as he feels warmth wash over his mind.
The intense relief from her brief touch convinces him, "Oh please, yes. But only if you promise to wake me the moment you find my ship."
"I promise. Let's go where you can lay down." They walk back to the bunks and she offers him her bed. He stretches out on his back and closes his eyes. She touches his head and the calming warmth spreads from her fingertips, easing his nerves, every muscle seeming to relax at once. He falls asleep within minutes and she stays with him, making sure his mind is resting before she returns to the console to watch for alerts of his ship.
Drax stands behind her, "The Asgardians fascinate me. One runs boldly into battle while the other seems to shy from this fight, yet both were raised as warriors."
Mantis nods, "Thor seeks to protect and defend, while Loki...Loki's heart is tangled. His thoughts are messy, and I don't think he has always been on the right side."
"How could he have been, given he was with Thanos?" Drax asks.
Gamora joins them, "He fell into Thanos' world. He was scared, angry, hurt, and lonely. It wasn't hard for Thanos to use those things in his favour and to promise Loki everything he'd felt he'd been cheated out of."
"Oh? What did he think he deserved that he didn't have?" Mantis asks.
"A kingdom," Gamora answers, "But I'm not going to go into a lot of that story while he's still on board. Neither of us were our best selves. Right now, he doesn't need anybody to judge him for who he was then."
"And who was that?" Quill asks, coming from behind them.
"One of Thanos' lackeys," Gamora answers, "No worse than me."
"I'm still going to feel better when he's off the ship," Quill replies.
"Why?" Drax asks.
Gamora shakes her head, "We're in no more danger from him than we are if my father comes looking for me. And he will come looking for me."
"Look, I just don't like that he's here, alright?"
Gamora sighs, "Peter, he's not causing any trouble. And you don't even know what Thanos put him through. I do. Just let him rest while we scan for his ship. When we find it, he says he'll leave."
"You believe him?" Quill asks.
"Yes," she answers.
"What about the rest of you?"
Drax shrugs, "I don't have a reason to doubt him."
Mantis nods, "I agree – he is tired and worried. There is something on his ship he needs to find and when he does, he will feel much, much better."
"You did the mind thing?" Quill asks.
"Only so he could sleep," Mantis answers. "He says there are terrible things in his dreams."
"Huh," Quill replies, "Alright. Well if none of you have a problem with this, then I guess I'll be fine with it for now. But if things get weird..."
"Peter, there are four of us and one of him and where's he going to go? We're in the middle of space surrounded by the remains of a refugee vessel and corpses of his people," Gamora says, "Whatever happens...we'll handle it. But he's just sleeping right now, so let him rest while we scan for his ship."
"What happens if we can't find it?" Drax asks.
"I guess he goes with us to Knowhere," Quill says, "Or we find somewhere to drop him off on the way."
The scanner chirps and all four of them turn toward it. Mantis leans forward at the same time as Gamora. There is a little blip on the far edge of the screen.
"Do you think that's it?" Mantis asks.
"It's got the right signature," Gamora answers, "So it's pretty likely. But I want to get a little better look at it to confirm."
"He said to wake him as soon as we found it," Mantis replies.
"We don't know if we've found it yet, though," Gamora says, "Let him sleep while we get closer. He doesn't need false hope."
"I know what it looks like," she offers, "He showed me. A little illusion in his hand."
Gamora alters their course, "Well...when you recognize it, go wake him. But until then, leave him be. At least he'll have one last good rest before he has to fight or Thanos finds him."
#
Loki wakes up to fingertips on his temple and opens his eyes to find Mantis bending over him, "Did you...?" he asks.
"We did!" Mantis replies, excited, "It looks just like the one from your hand."
Loki scrambles from the bunk, "Have you scanned for life forms?"
"No," she says, "I didn't know you wanted us to."
He nods, "True. But that's the next step."
They hurry back to the helm and Mantis reaches past Gamora to scan for any life on the ship. Loki's heart is in his throat as he sees it come up on the screen, not just on the scanner display. He nervously kneads his palms, waiting for the results.
"One life form on the ship," she reads, "It looks to be at the back of the passenger compartment."
"Oh thank all that's holy in the Nine...," Loki whispers.
Gamora looks over her shoulder at him and smiles, "Looks like you should go pack up your armour and get ready for docking."
"Oh, I'll change," Loki says, "I don't want to deprive you of your set of clothes."
Mantis shakes her head, "No, keep them. You need something cozy instead of just your leather. Not all clothes need to be for fighting."
He smiles, "Thank you," and then hurries off to where he has left his discarded garments. He bundles everything together in his cape and returns to the others, watching as they inch closer to the little disc-shaped ship drifting in space a little ways from the most of the wreckage. This was his plan, and the heading he'd quickly set before leaving Sleipnir behind. It hadn't been precise, just a general direction, change in speed, and a guess on how far away would be safe enough if the ship exploded. He is relieved that his panicked calculations had been enough.
"What is that?" Quill asks.
The blob of light in the ship shifts, "It's a large creature," Mantis says. "It doesn't have much space there."
"No," Loki answers, "There isn't much space. But otherwise, he'd be dead. It was the best I could do before we fled Asgard."
Quill turns toward him, "So...what is it?"
"Sleipnir," Loki answers, "One of Asgard's great treasures."
"Does Asgard name all its treasures?" Drax asks. "Thor had a hammer with a name. He spoke of a staff as well."
"Those items truly precious to our people are given the honour of names, yes," Loki answers.
"So...how do we dock?" Quill asks.
Loki brings the illusion of his ship forth and offers it forward, turning it so he can share how the docking mechanism works. Gamora talks through how their ship can join with it, even though it will be a little unsteady. She and Quill pilot their vessel close to his and he hurries to the airlock when they initiate the docking procedure.
Drax wishes Loki well first before he heads to the airlock to engage the magnetic clamps as the two vessels align. Mantis bows to him and smiles as she reminds him to rest. He thanks her for the peace she's already been able to grant him. Gamora meets him as they enter the airlock after Drax leaves. They step in and the bulkhead behind them closes.
"Before I go...I just want to thank you for your kindness," he says. "We parted last time on less-than-friendly terms . What he did to both of us, what he had us do to each other, was wrong. But I don't blame you." Loki sets his bundle on the deck and cautiously rests his hand on her shoulder, watching her face for any reaction to tell him to stop. When she keeps his eyes and nods, he continues, "Gamora, even if it won't last in body, in spirit...he can't cage you. Not ever again." He moves his hand to the back of her neck and rests his forehead against hers, "I forgive you for all of it. And I thank you for allowing me this brief time of rest."
Gamora doesn't respond immediately and so Loki simply waits. He hears her breathing catch and he knows from the small, silent shaking of her shoulder that she's feeling more than she will ever admit to if anyone later asks. He lifts his head and steps back, reaching up to dry the tears that sneak down her cheeks.
"Damnit, Loki...I told myself this was all behind me. That I could live with what I'd done and never feel anything about it again. But I do. All the time." She steps in and kisses his cheek, "Thank you. And I forgive you, too."
He smiles and nods, "And so we've found our peace with each other. But now...my son is waiting for me."
They open the hatch into Loki's vessel and he climbs through. It is dark, and he can see Sleipnir's outline in the dim light cast from the airlock. He makes his way to the main console and brings it to life, tapping a few things before the lights fade to life. The small hold is a mess of scattered straw, feed, and a small pile of manure in one corner. The carrots are gone. Sleipnir's ears perk up and he whinnies, excited to see Loki.
His face brightens and he tosses his bundle of clothing on one of the pilot seats before dropping beside Sleipnir, wrapping his arms around his neck, his face buried in Sleipnir's mane, "I'm so glad you're safe..." Sleipnir whinnies and nuzzles against him.
Gamora smiles as she heads to the controls and starts diagnostic checks. The man she first encountered with Thanos was sharpened into a weapon, his anger and pain used against him, no room for gentleness in survival. She'd often wondered who he was before he reached their world. The little time she's had with him has been a glimpse at the answer.
The scans finished, she turns to Loki, "Everything checks out – you're going to need to find someplace to stop for supplies, but there's nothing wrong with your ship, life support's fine, and it'll get you wherever you want to go."
He nods from where he rests against the eight-legged horse, "Thank you. We'll be alright."
"He doesn't have much room."
"I know. And the journey isn't going to be easy for him. But we'll do our best to get to Nidavellir as fast as possible." Loki skritches Sleipnir's ears, "We'll make it, Gamora. Rest assured, we'll be alright." He smiles at her.
She smiles back, "Take care of yourself. I'm not likely to ever see you again, so..."
"Goodbye, Gamora. And stay strong."
Gamora nods, "Yeah. Goodbye, Loki. Safe travels." She returns to her own vessel, the hatch sealing behind her. Loki hears the magnetic coupling releasing as he sighs and glances to the pile of manure in the corner, "Let's do a little housekeeping, shall we?" He gestures to it and it vanishes, reappearing outside the ship a moment later. "That's better. We'll put that magic to good use on this trip – little pocket dimension here, slip it over there, open it outside..."
On the other ship, Gamora pauses, leaning on the bulkhead for a minute before she heads back to work. She'd never expected to see Loki alive again, if at all, and his presence has dragged up memories she hadn't wanted to remember.
"Hey, everything alright over there?" Quill asks.
"Yeah. He's fine."
"And what he was looking for?"
"Fine, too."
"You gonna tell me what was so important?"
She shakes her head, "No. Just know that you've made something right, you've saved Sleipnir's life, and even if things go badly when we meet up with Thanos again...well, I'll go with one less regret."
"Things aren't going to go badly, Gamora. We've got this."
She sighs and shakes her head, "No, we don't. And I'm going to have to ask you to do something if he catches me..."