The envelope had the seal of the Coral Peacocks on it. And the handwriting was definitely from captain Dorothy.
Still, Vanessa hesitated to open it. Actually, she had no idea what made her more nervous. No news and continuing to be uncertain on that matter… or rather finally having some news from the Witch Queen and learning something new that could either help or make the whole situation more difficult as it already was.
Vanessa sighed. She couldn't eternally postponing to read Dorothy's letter. Whatever the captain of the Coral Peacocks wrote her, be it something new or not, she'll learned it anyway. Better sooner than later.
She wished Nozel was here, though. She hadn't seen him since yesterday morning, so of course she misses him. But he was in the capital and Vanessa hated knowing that he was there, where the tension was the strongest. Of course she was worried about him, but she also trusted him. It was just that she felt better when Nozel was with her and Aimée.
Vanessa looked over to her daughter, who was dozing in her crib. Looking so frail and still, there was a strength in her, Vanessa was sure of it. But that didn't change the fact that Aimée was still a baby who needed to be taken care of and protected.
Vanessa clenched a fist. She would never allow anyone to harm her daughter, no matter from which circles they came from.
"Well, it won't change much if I open the letter yet or later, after all."
With determination, Vanessa broke the seal and unfold the letter.
Hello there, Vanessa dear!
How's it going? I hope land life isn't too boring for you, at least it's healthy. Especially for your little cutie pie. I ask Nozel a lot about her, but he won't tell me details, you know how he is. Maybe I shall come over one day. I really want to see your little cupcake again.
The tension is really heavy back there, especially in the capital. Well, I don't think I'm telling you anything new with that. But we have some reports about Magic Knights quitting their squads, because the ideology of the coalition appeals to them. Of course, these are nobles. But those cases are luckily pretty rare, most Magic Knights stay true to us, thankfully. I never had such a case in my squad and I pray I'll never have one.
But I'm babbling about things everybody knows by now, while you surely more interested about news from the Forest of Witches. Well, I got something, but it's not much and I have no idea if it will help.
First things first, I didn't see the queen. It was like she wasn't there and the other witches told me that she had rarely been seen since the news of you, Nozel and the cutie pie have come. Really strange, don't you think? I asked the other witches, but of course, they couldn't help me. They don't even know all details, just that you have a child with a very handsome man.
Although, I might have a lead. The witches told me about one of us, a very old witch who neither really quit the forest nor clearly obeys the Witch Queen. Her name is Morgana. I can't really say that this will be the solution to all of your problems. But I'm still going to see her soon, let's see what she has to tell me.
I'll write as soon as I talked to Morgana.
Happy greetings and sweet Dreams
Dorothy Unsworth
Captain of the Coral Peacocks
Vanessa slowly let the hand holding the letter drop. Well, she had no idea if those new informations were a step forward or not.
Despite the fact that it wasn't helping at all, Vanessa hadn't been surprised that the Witch Queen stayed silent about the whole affair. She couldn't even tell why, she just… wasn't surprised. But the fact that the Witch Queen had been rarely seen since by the other witches, that was actually unexpected. Why would the queen… her mother… well, why would she hide from her subjects?
Was it about Vanessa? Was it because of something else? Vanessa couldn't tell.
Maybe Dorothy would learn something from whoever Morgana was. Vanessa never had heard of this apparently very old witch, but like Dorothy, she didn't live in the forest anymore and when she had, it was mostly in the cage.
Vanessa sighed as she let herself fell back on the mattress. She didn't know if she had the nerves right now to think about this whole topic. Her past and her present, not to mention the future. The cage and the whole uncertainty, not to mention to hope for Nozel, Aimée and herself to win their current fight.
There was a cry coming from the crib and Vanessa got up instinctively.
"What's the problem, sweetheart?" she asked as she took Aimée in her arms.
There wasn't any bad smell coming from her windle and given how her daughter was searching for her chest, Vanessa immediately knew that she was hungry.
So, she sat down and started breastfeeding her baby.
While Aimée drank, Vanessa couldn't help but let her thoughts wander again. She hasn't really learnt anything from Dorothy's letter, except that the Witch Queen rarely show herself after the first news and that there was an old witch with maybe some answers, who leaves apart from the forest without really leaving.
Was this going to be helpful or not? And how many times will she actually be asking this question?
She never really cared for a long time, but today it was still something Vanessa asked herself from time to time. Was she really the daughter of the Witch Queen, like the direct daughter? The queen always seemed to consider all witches her daughters, maybe she took a special interest in Vanessa because of the Fate spell? But… could she also be her direct daughter? Would that be enough to be considered a princess, so a fit match for a member of royalty? But witches didn't consider bloodlines and such things like the people of the Clover Kingdom. Some nobles and royals would maybe use this an argument. Sadly, not all corrupt nobles were stupid. Some were smart.
And the father of the Silva Siblings was apparently one of the cleverest ones in the kingdom.
For someone she never met, this man had still some heavy repercussions on Vanessas life. Just because she was the lover of his eldest son. But what she heard and learned about him was enough to actually dislike Lac Silva.
Lac… she had such mixed feelings about this name. On one hand, despite how strange it could seem, it sounded calm, like a lake in a forest, were time seemed to pass by slowly. But the actions of the man wearing that name were like a raging storm, ruining more than one life.
Vanessa looked down at Aimée, who was still drinking. Would she inherit something from that man? After all, Lac Silva was her grandfather, whether he liked it or not. Noelle got nothing from him, except her magic affinity and the eye colour. Vanessa knew that Nebra and Solid get most of her traits from their father, while Nozel was the only one of the siblings to be a mix of his parents.
But was it really that important if Aimée would get something from a grandfather who considered her existence as an insult for himself? No, it didn't matter. She was still her beloved daughter and Nozels, that was important.
Vanessa hoped she would never met that man. Because if that happened, she knew that she'll make him have it for what he had done to his children and what he was still doing. But given the current situation in the kingdom and the influence Lac Silva sadly had, Vanessa knew that it won't be the best idea.
Honestly, she would be really glad if she will never met him her whole life. He already had enough repercussions on it, she didn't need to meet him in person on top of that.
Good thing that the chances of meeting him were very low, now that she lived in this cottage. But she was more worried about Nozel, who was at risk to see his father when he was in the capital, even though this man seemed to do all his possible to avoid his son. When those two would meet again by some bad luck, would Lac Silva provoke his son somehow? Vanessa knew that Nozel could handle insults about himself, but when it was directed at persons he cared about, that was another story.
"Please stay strong, honey," Vanessa whispered.
Also, what about Noelle, could she face her father without losing it? Vanessa knew her squadmate was strong and not afraid like during her first days with the Black Bulls. But this wasn't a situation you could simply solve with Sea Dragons Roar or other water spells, sadly. And Nebra? What were her feelings about their estranged father? Vanessa could only vaguely imagine it, given how she took her brothers side, but she didn't want to pry. The father of the Silva siblings was a heavy subject for all of them.
At least for those three who were still here. Who knows what Solid feels about his father? The last Silva was out of the capital and even the Noble Realm. None of his siblings had seen him since his fight with Nozel. All contact they had with him today were just short letters. Only auntie Océane received some longer news from time to time.
What a mess this whole situation was, really. Vanessa felt exhausted, even though she was far away from the worst tension.
But not from the whole.
Vanessa closed her eyes. If only she could forget about all of this uncertainty and those difficulties, even for one second. One second would already be a lot.
As she shut her eyes, she heard the door of her bedroom getting opened and closed; one moment later two arms were around her waist. She relaxed immediately, like always.
"I missed you."
"I'm sorry."
Nozel kissed her cheek softly. Vanessa couldn't help but giggle as she felt his braid tickling her.
She turned her head a bit to take a better look at him. Nozel looked exhausted, like he haven't got enough sleep lately. Which was no wonder, he spent the two last days in the royal capital. Normally, Vanessa would have scold him with worry, but she was too tired for this.
"I don't want to go back to the capital ever again," Nozel muttered in her hair.
"Can't be more terrible as usual. At least I hope so."
"You have no idea. Since I made my position clear, I get more marriage proposals than ever. For me and for my siblings. I had a small hope that I would finally be free from them, but… it was foolish to hope that."
"Can't they leave you alone, once in a while?" Vanessa sighed. Completely would be even better, but knowing nobles, that won't happen so easily.
She had no reason to be jealous and Vanessa knew that. But she still was angry at those nobles, young ladies or their parents, writing Nozel about potential marriage proposals. It was almost like they saw as an object, a price to win. A price she basically snatched away from them, in their eyes. But she was a witch, so they probably won't count her in their schemes.
"I don't think they will. Some are even bold enough to write that they will take it in their own hands to bring House Silva on the right path again. Which basically means to form our House into the image they want to see it."
He sounded bitter and even resigned. Vanessa sighed again. She knew that forming House Silva into an image it wasn't would be something those same nobles would reproach her. Even though it was what they wanted, controlling and gain more power. But that wasn't her. She wanted was to be with Nozel, grow old with him. On the contrary of those nobles, she would have chosen him anytime, even if he wasn't royalty.
Nozel kissed her cheek again before saying softly, "But why shall I choose some noble lady, when I have the most wonderful woman in my arms?"
"Thank you, honey," Vanessa whispered, feeling a bit better by his words. She turned her head so that their lips could meet in a soft kiss.
"There's also a ball tonight in the capital, organized by some members of the coalition" Nozel explained as they parted.
"A ball? With everything going on in the kingdom?"
"Well, I can't really understand their reasoning. Maybe they wanted to make a façade, trying to believe that this situation isn't a big deal at all. Maybe also to show royals some potential partners for marriages. I was of course invited."
"But you're here…"
"I dealt with more than enough desperate nobles, I refuse to waste any more time with this… nonsense."
Vanessa giggled at his disgusted tone, but she immediately went serious again. "But wouldn't it make a bad impression if you Silvas aren't present? Well, worse than it is already."
"That's why Nebra decided to go. Not long, just enough that no one can really complain for the absence of our house. I hope she'll be alright. Especially since our father will be present too, apparently."
Vanessa flinched at the mere mention of Lac Silva. Nozel felt it as he hold her closer to him, as tightly as he could. What was the goal of this man, really? It couldn't be only because of his reputation, given how much effort he made to make Nozels and her life more difficult. But honestly, it wouldn't be a surprise if his reputation was his reason.
"Why can't he leave you alone? Us…" she said quietly as she looked at her daughter, still drinking.
"I don't know."
One of his hand let go of her waist to caress softly Aimées head. Vanessa leaned her head against his, closing her eyes. What all three of them had together was so precious, she didn't want to lose it.
As the Black Bull she was, Vanessa had of course no intention to give up. But the path she went on was one of the most stony and tricky ones she ever were on. There were many reasons why she had to go on this road. Own decisions and their consequences, of course. Vanessa could live with that. But there were also actions, decisions of people from outside, who forced her and Nozel to go down this stony road.
One of those people was the father of her boyfriend, the grandfather of her child. As much as Vanessa knew that family wasn't only defined by blood – the Black Bulls were a great example of it – she couldn't ignore this very fact. Somehow it hurt, way more than it should.
"He won't give up, right?"
She had to ask. Even though she knew the answer, she couldn't help but ask. Nozel sighed in her shoulder, but continued to caress Aimée.
"He sadly has no reason to. I have no idea what could make him abandon. His influence is big, you see what happened when he made our… situation public. And… I had no idea he could be this stubborn. I knew he was, given his arrogance. But it's like his stubbornness surpassed a limit."
Vanessa closed her eyes. She didn't like that this phrase, the proud motto of her own squad, applied also to Lac Silva. Or rather his stubbornness. It felt wrong, as if the phrase was at risk to be sullied.
"I hope I'll never met him."
"I hope as well. He already had very specific words to describe you, even though you never crossed his path. I… don't want him near you and Aimée." He hold her tighter. "That fear seems too far-fetched. You're hidden in the middle of nowhere. But…"
He didn't finished. He didn't need to.
"I know, honey. I'm worried as well," Vanessa said quietly. "It's like… I don't know, an unknown menace? The longer our situation is lasting, the more I feel this, well, presence of a threat. Invisible and maybe not real, but I still can't help myself. I won't give up, that's not an option, but I can't help to be scared."
She sighed, closing her eyes again, before continuing, "I'm sorry, Nozel. You know me… Normally I'm more optimistic, I try to stay positive in this whole mess. But there are days when it's like too much to ignore…"
She stopped, unable to find anymore words. A single tear fell down her cheek, which Nozel kissed away softly.
"I understand."
His words, his hold and another kiss. It was enough. Not to let her fear disappear, but to slowly calm down.
They both looked at Aimée, who was still drinking. So tiny and frail, so innocent. Their little treasure.
In a way, Vanessa could understand both of their worries. They weren't only lovers who had to fight to be together, like in some tales of grandmothers or some dark romance novels. They were also parents, responsible for their child.
Vanessa turned slowly her head to kiss Nozels cheek. "You're such a great father. Way better than your own."
"Thank you."
Just a faint whisper, but she could hear how touched he was by her words.
Aimée made a little sound, showing that she was sated. Vanessa put her daughter on her shoulder, so that she could burp.
She then put Aimée softly in Nozels arms, while she sang the lullaby. Aimée soon closed her eyes, falling asleep with her father kissing her forehead, before he went up to lie her down in her crib.
It was like a ritual, something any normal parents would do in their day-to-day life. Simple, but more precious than anyone would think. Vanessa refused to lose it, she wanted those moments out of the uncertainty they were currently living.
They hold each other tightly as they lied down. Nozel put his arms around her, his nose in her hair, while Vanessa cuddled against his chest, leaning her face on his shoulder. The fear was still there and they couldn't ignore it. But it helped to just hold each other and to have their daughter right next to them.
Here they lied, holding each other, more aware than ever of the roles they played in the play of their current life. They were lovers, fighting so they could be together… but also parents, fighting for their little daughter.
Far away from there and later that evening, in a very rich study of a royal estate, lord Lac Silva was reading a letter.
His bright pink eyes flew over the words, glowing more and more with anger at each passing sentence. At the end, he stood there like frozen for a moment, before ripping the letter in half.
"Damn you, Solid! And here I thought that you were the only one I could have still some hope for, since you seemed to have turned your back on your renegade brother. But I was wrong, you're still a disappointment. I'm not even surprised."
Lac Silva breathes in deeply, like he was trying to calm himself down. His long white hair, arranged with some fancy silver here and there, had been skilfully worked into a complicated, sophisticated hairstyle and the tone of his skin was perfectly smooth, glowingly pale. Looking like early thirty, when in reality he was over fifty.
Without another look for the ripped letter on the floor, he went to the window. It was a magnificent night, but Lac Silva wasn't the kind of person to be in awe for that kind of beauty.
"Goodness, Nozel, where are you hiding your bastard and your whore of a witch? You can't hide them forever, you should now the consequences. And you still run, coward. You didn't appear at the ball, did you really think sending only Nebra would have helped you. As if she could have done something, she left shortly, that foolish girl."
The man sighed, before sliding back some hair that got free from his sophisticated hairstyle. Anger and determination were waltzing in his eyes.
He didn't saw the light of the moon, the shining stars, the beautiful landscape in front of him.
"Let's hope they never find out about that secret. They would use it against me. Unless," a wicked smile appeared on his lips. "Unless, of course, I find a way to turn tables and use it against them. It would be difficult, but I better prepare myself for this worst-case scenario, just in case. As a joker card."
Lac Silva turned away and left the study. It was time for him to go to sleep. His wicked grin didn't left him as he closed the door.
If only this was a nightmare. Because if it was one, at least Nozel would have been able to wake up.
But it wasn't a nightmare. It was the horrible reality…
The news had spread like wild fire through the castle and with such a violence that the captain of the Silver Eagles wouldn't be surprised if even the people in the Forsaken Realm would hear about it before the evening.
About him and Vanessa. About their still unborn child. About the fact, that him, Head of House Silva and captain of the Silver Eagles, a royal squad, that Nozel Silva of all people is going to be the father of a bastard and had no intention to throw his child away, as well as the mother.
Everyone in the kingdom was going to know and there was nothing he could do to prevent the secret to go out. It was too late anyway.
Nozel walked, making no noise, hoping that he could become invisible by some miracle. He could hear screaming and yelling of the present nobles, but it seems so far away from him. He did his best to ignore them, he refused to talk to them. All he wanted was to get out of here and join Vanessa, seeing if she and the baby were okay.
Nozel sighed deeply. That's not what he wanted. That wasn't how it was supposed to go. It had already been difficult. A royal with a witch was already an unlikely match for this kingdom standards and the surprise pregnancy had forced Vanessa and himself to take some changes in their plans to make their relationship public.
As if his fight with Solid and his departure, the return of his father, the anti-bastards rumours that were getting louder weren't enough already. Now everything about him and Vanessa was out, they couldn't come slowly step by step out of secrecy.
Nozel knew that it might have terrible reaction from the nobles if their relationship and even more, the pregnancy became public without precautions.
But he never would have thought that it was going to be this… violent.
A hand gripped on his shoulder, interrupting his thoughts. Nozel turned around, ready to put a noble in his place. But thankfully, it was only Fuegoleon.
"Let's get you out of here," was all the captain of the Crimson Lions said, pulling his rival with him.
Fuegoleon never knew until now about Nozels situation. But there was no reproach in his eyes. Surprise yes and some kind of understanding, but his rival wasn't upset at him. Not at all.
Both royals made their way through the corridors and the groups of heavily discussing nobles. Salamander was flying above them, hissing at anyone who would try to approach them, while Fuegoleon lead Nozel swiftly out of the palace.
"I need to see Vanessa, to warn her, to-" Nozel stopped himself. It was such a weird feeling. On one side, he perfectly knew what he had to do, but on the other side, he had no idea. He felt himself filled with worry for Vanessa and their unborn baby, while thinking about every possible strategy to protect them.
"I know, there's a lot to do. But first we need to get you out of this nest of vipers," Fuegoleon said with determination.
"Your grandfather will not be happy that you're helping me right here."
"I know, but I can't leave you alone in this mess. That wouldn't be the right thing to do."
Nozel looked away, unable to repress the gratitude he felt for his rival right now. Fuegoleon was a pain most of the time and surely would always be. But this act of friendship from his rival meant more to him than he was able to admit.
"It's maybe not the best place, but still. Congratulations, Nozel."
Fuegoleon quickly smiled at him, before looking back on their way out.
Nozel couldn't help but look down. It was nice of his rival to congratulate him and knowing him, Fuegoleon meant it. But not everyone today would partake those feelings. They would look at him in unbelief, disgust even. Not towards him directly, but towards Vanessa, who was a witch and towards a child, who will be born as a bastard.
He hated to have that thought, but it was the sad truth. Vanessa wasn't his wife, at least yet, and given how things were going on right in the kingdom, it would surely take a while.
Nozel saw Vanessa in his mind, how she was on his bed or on hers back at the Black Bulls hideout, sitting or lying as comfortable as she can with her big belly, sewing baby clothing and blankets, asking him with a smile which embroidery he would prefer for this blanket or those clothes and teasing him while she would embroider eagles together with bulls. Yes, Vanessa was the woman he wanted to grow old with.
The idea of a secret wedding came to his mind again, like so often these last few months. But he knew that most past secret weddings within nobility and royalty ended in a tragic way. He had read enough reports to know that. So, Nozel doubted still that a secret wedding would have helped him and Vanessa right now. Surely his father would have found a way to use it against them.
His father…
Could he be behind all this? Did he made his whole affair public? To make him bend? The more Nozel thought about it, the more he was sure of it. He clenched his fists. It was already horrible to think that his own father, absent most of the time, somehow learned about his son being with a witch and on the way to become a father himself. But now that this man made the whole affair public…
"Nozel, what's wrong? You look so angry all of a sudden."
"My father…"
That was all he needed to say. Fuegoleon understood immediately.
"Lac is most probably behind all this. He came last evening at the Vermillion Palace, to see my grandfather. You know how on good terms they are. I don't know what their discussion were about, but… Well, given what happened today, I might have an idea. I'm really sorry, Nozel."
"Don't be. I refuse to think about him. All I need, all I want is to see Vanessa and to find a solution-"
"And for that, you need to get out of here. You won't find one in the middle of angry nobles. And pardon me if I sound rude, but you're not calm enough for this task right now."
"I still need to find one soon. Vanessa is at the end of her seventh month," Nozel replied. He couldn't tell if he sounded angry or desperate.
"So it will be soon. Well, reason more to find a solution out of this palace. Listen, that's what we're going to do. We'll leave the palace, go somewhere calm, you can explain urgent details I might better know and then we'll join Vanessa."
That sounded like a plan. Even though Nozel would prefer to join Vanessa immediately, to hold her forever. But his rival was helping him right now and won't take no for an answer. Fuegoleon deserved to know some more details in order to help him and Nozel, despite his raging storm of feelings inside, wasn't in the mood to refuse. It would have been stupid anyway.
Nozel ignored if his father was present. Hopefully not, because with how he was feeling right now, he doubted that he would be able to face him. As if his opinion and his reputation would bend him anyway.
Lac Silva hated it, he made perfectly clear last time. But that doesn't matter. Nozel wanted Vanessa and no one else to be at his side for the rest of his life and unlike his father, the captain of the Silver Eagle swore to be a real parent for his child.