Summary: RWBY Chibi inspired! In Freed's early days at the guild, he quickly learns to never insult a Fairy Tail girl.

Pairings: General friendship feels.

YouTube Prompt: Gray tribute to 'Cold as Ice' by Foreigner.

"BURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP!"

It had been a fairly quiet day at the guild with its usual buzz of chaos (only two brawls so far!) when Cana suddenly slouched back into her chair and let out the biggest, loudest, burp to date. The reaction to this had been mixed most were silently disgusted (Erza, Laxus, and Levy being the most notable ones) while others were in approving awe (Natsu and Bickslow actually verbally congratulating Cana).

Freed, however, was neither silent nor approving.

The newest addition of Fairy Tail stuck out like a sore thumb with his prim way of dressing and excellently neat manners but he proved himself to be just as outgoing as any Fairy Tail mage when he opened his mouth to offer criticism.

"Cana," Freed crossed his arms disapprovingly, "you are so uncouth."

Cana looked taken aback at that. "What?!" Cana slurred drunkenly and rather indignantly. "I am plenty couthed. I have couth coming out of my ears!"

"Hmm," Freed raised an eyebrow at this, "do you know what your problem is?"

"What?" Cana scoffed as she flicked her hair back. "That I am too awesome? That I make this look too easy? I care too much? You can stop me anytime."

"You," Freed announced dramatically, "are a tomboy!"

The girls all gasped at that.

Not because what Freed said was at all insulting, there was nothing wrong with being a tomboy after all, but rather the way he had said it. As if there was something fundamentally wrong about a girl wanting to do boyish things like play sports, or wield weapons, or burp like a pig.

Also Cana's easy-going attitude instantaneously melted into a frosty scowl as her shoulders tensed up and a blazing, malicious, fire that promised no mercy flared up in her eyes.

This was not going to end well…..for Freed.

Cana stood up slowly as she glowered menacingly at Freed. "What did you say?!" she spat out between gritted teeth.

"Uh-oh!" Natsu and Happy chorused in unison as they (and every other male member of the guild) all took a big step back. "Freed is in sooooooooooooooooooo much trouble!" Natsu added.

"I said," Freed said calmly, completely oblivious and unbothered by Cana's brewing temper, "that you are a tomboy and that lets you down. You should be more like a lady, like Levy!" Freed waved a hand over at Levy who flushed brightly and ducked her head behind her book hastily. "She's so sweet, and kind, she's always trying to make other people feel good."

"Erm," Levy muttered shyly behind her book, "you know maybe we should talk about something else?" she said hesitatingly as she tried to defuse the situation a little. "Does anyone want a cake? I can make a cake!"

"Cake?" Erza repeated hopefully. "That would be-"

"And Erza," Freed carried on loudly, "she is so cultured and sophisticated."

Erza couldn't help but feel flattered at that. "That is true," she conceded graciously, "I cannot argue about that. Now about this cake…"

"And Mira," Freed gestured towards the white-haired girl who stood behind the bar, "with her welcoming smile. She's so adorable."

Mira smiled sweetly at that. "Aww!" she cooed and only those that had known her for years could hear the dangerous, threatening edge to her sweet voice and shuddered, "You really are new here."

Freed missed the implication of impending danger as he stepped closer to Cana.

"You, however, are not adorable," Freed declared, "Like at all. Get it together girl and who knows you might even be mistaken as a lady one day…"

BAM!

Cana stretched her hands out satisfactory as there was now a Freed-shaped hole in the guild building wall.

"Wanna repeat that pretty boy?!"

"….no," Freed called back weakly, "I apologise for being so rude."

"That's what I thought," Cana said smugly, "now who's gonna buy me another round of beer?"

Hastily – so they wouldn't be the next to be punched through a wall – the other guys all scrambled to buy Cana a drink as she sat back savouring being waited on hand and foot.

"Now that," Erza said approvingly, "is what I call a lady."