Author's Note: Next chapter is THE FINALE! I'm super excited to write it, but for now here is In My Time of Dying! I hope you guys like it! Please read and review so I know what to keep doing and what to change to keep you guys happy! Love you all! Thank you for supporting Emily's story!
Holy water splashed onto the ground as the demon screamed. Smoke rolled off of his skin and he grunted as he stopped screaming, grinding his teeth together.
"You ready to talk?" Dean asked him as he refilled the bucket.
"I don't know. I don't know anything!"
"Oh, you hear that, Sam? He doesn't know anything." Dean smiled sarcastically to Sam. I stood back in the corner, unamused.
"Yeah, I heard." Sam smirked.
"I'm telling you the truth." The demon yelled out of breath.
"Oh, you are? My god, then I owe you an apology. Allow me to make it up to you." Dean poured holy water down his throat, I closed my eyes and listened to him choking. "I'm gonna ask you one last time...Who holds my contract?!"
It was silent, I turned back to the demon who had his head hanging, he slowly looked up, pitch black eyes glistening and then he slowly dragged a smile onto his face. It was malicious. It was taunting… it was disgusting.
"Your mother. Yeah, she, uh, showed it to me right before I bent her over."
My blood turned to ice as I watched Dean's posture change at the mention of our mother. Theres not a lot of lines in Dean's book. He's a pretty flexible guy… but our Mom. That was THE line. The line that you don't cross under any circumstances, that's the final straw in any conversation.
And this demon just pulled the trigger on the gun.
"I want a name. Or else..." Dean said leaning down to him face to face.
"Or what? You're gonna squirt your holy water in both ends? Please. Brother, that's like a fleabite compared to what's coming to me if I tell you jack. Do what you want. The only thing I'm scared of is the demon holding your ticket."
Dean stood and stared at him, then looked up to Sam. Nodding to him to start the exorcism. As Sam spoke the demon writhed back and forth in pain.
"How does that feel? Does that feel good?" Dean asked him.
"Go ahead. Send me back to hell... 'Cause when you get there, I'll be waiting for you...with a few pals who are dying for a nice little meet and greet with Dean Winchester."
Red hot fire burned deep in my chest… Just the thought of Dean going to hell puts every nerve I have on edge. Before Dean could answer or Sam could continue I lifted my hand and let the feeling flow from my chest to my hands. I watched as the cocky smiling Demon began to feel it… I could literally see his heart beating through his wet shirt. The veins in his face became prominent and his eyes bloodshot within seconds.
"Emily stop!" Dean called, but I ignored him.
I took two steps forward into the light and out of my little corner. I twisted my hand in the slightest and the demon began to scream and beg for it to stop.
"Emily! That's enough!" Dean yelled pushing my hands down. The feeling quickly faded, leaving me with only a bloody nose. Dean grabbed a rag and held it to my face, glaring at me the entire time.
"Sam. Send him someplace he can't hurt anyone else." Then he turned to me. "Upstairs. Now… We'll discuss this in a minute."
I rolled my eyes and began to walk up the stairs, Sam's voice in the background as he finished the exorcism. Once I reached the top of the stairs I walked into the kitchen and raided Bobby's fridge for a drink.
"What happened?"
Judson's voice caused me to spin, I didn't even know he had entered the room. I looked at him confused and he lifted the bloodied rag I had set on the counter.
"Oh… that. Don't ask."
"You did it again didn't you?" He asked me crossing his arms. I sighed and closed the fridge.
"Would it matter if I did?"
"You need to stop using them like this Em. Its not right. Its not who you are."
"We need to find the demon. Period. Point blank. No matter what it takes. A few nose bleeds would be well worth it if it means we end up saving Dean."
"Em this isn't just about nose bleeds! We don't know what else these abilities are doing to you, or what could happen if you let them take over, so why risk it?"
"Dean."
Just as I said his name he came around the corner.
"What the hell Em? I told you not to pull that shit!"
"Dean you weren't getting anything out of him, maybe if you let me help we can actually get somewhere!"
"No. We discussed this already, and I'm not changing my mind! We are NOT putting you in that situation!"
"You had no problem putting me in that situation at the police station." I threw back at him.
"Because it was life or death, and even then you nearly strangled someone."
"This is life or death too Dean!"
"No. That's my final answer…"
"Dean that's not fair!"
"You know what- you need to stay up here with Bobby from now on. If you can't control yourself then you don't need to be down there in the first place."
"Dean you can't do that!"
"I just did."
Dean stormed out of the room and back down to the basement with Sam.
"Ugh!" I yelled frustrated as I threw my water bottle across the room. It smacked into the cabinets and landed on the ground, but not before it narrowly missed Bobby's head.
"Whoa darling. What did the cabinet ever do to you?"
"Sorry Uncle Bobby."
"Why don't you two go pick us up some grub, those idjit brothers of yours will be begging for food by the time they finish burning this one."
"Sure." I sighed. I went to walk outside, but Bobby caught me by the arm.
"Have a little patience darling. Dean's just a little on edge right now."
"I can help them Bobby."
"They're not ready for help yet, but… give it some time. Go grab us some pizzas." He said as he let me go and smiled. Judson followed behind with the keys to his truck.
"You know." He said getting my attention. "I really missed driving this thing."
"I bet you don't miss the gas mileage on it." I grinned.
"True, but there's nothing better than driving this beast down a dirt road."
"Yeah." I sighed pulling over my seatbelt.
"Em do me a favor."
"What?" I asked curiously.
"Smile… just for a minute or two."
"I'm sorry. I know I've not been much fun lately."
"Its okay." He said as he grabbed my hand. I slid over in the seat to sit close to him. He leaned down and kissed me lightly, slowly, gently. I reached up and grabbed him by the hair, pulling him to me. His hand slid down my back to my jeans and I slid down in the seat, pulling him on top of me. He didn't pull back, but instead hovered over me, taunting me by having his body mere centimeters from mine.
He pulled back and I grinned widely.
"There's a smile" He whispered into my ear, kissing me on the cheek and pulling me to sit back up.
"Such a tease." I sighed, he laughed.
He put the truck in drive and began to drive us down the road and into town. I stared out the window, up at the stars that overtook the dark sky, the moon was full and lit up the fields around us as we drove. It was beautiful, peaceful… it made me wonder how bad things can happen in a place so beautiful.
"Judson… do you think they're bad?"
"What?"
"My… abilities? I mean do you think they came from a bad place?"
"I don't know Em, kind of a mystery."
"If they do come from a bad place, do you think that makes me a bad person?"
"No." He answered quickly.
"How are you that sure about it?"
"Because I know you… anyone who knows you would know that you don't have an evil bone in your body. Emily I don't like you using them because it's not you that takes over, it something else. And I don't know enough about that something else to know how to keep you safe. I don't think it's a good idea to play with this stuff. Okay? So listen to Dean. He's just trying to protect you."
"But they respond to me! I can get us somewhere, If I can find this demon then I can save my brother Judson, I know it!"
"What happens when you hunt this demon down and he goes back on the deal and kills Sam, and then drags Dean to hell just for fun?"
"Why would you even say something like that?!"
"Because it's my job to consider all the possible outcomes. And you and I both know cornering this demon could backfire."
I sat in silence and considered his words. They made me sick. Am I willing to risk losing them both? Does that make me a horrible person? Does it put Dean in front of Sam?
My brain swam in circles. Guilt and uneasiness filled my gut.
"Turn around."
"Emily, lets just go grab some food okay?"
"I'm not hungry."
"You still need to eat."
"I need you to stop talking to me."
"So what? You're just gonna be pissed at me for the rest of the night because I was honest with you?"
Instead of responding to him I pulled my knees up in the seat and turned my gaze back out the window. He continued to drive in silence, I watched as the empty fields turned into sparse houses, then into city streets. Judson pulled into the small pizza restaurant and climbed out of the truck. He moved to walk around to my side, but before he could reach it I locked the door. Then his. He proceeded to walk up to my door and try to open it, when he was met with resistance he shot me an annoyed look through the window.
"Seriously? Get out of the truck Em."
I turned to face away from him. He knocked on the window in an attempt to get my attention.
"C'mon Em. Get out here."
I continued to ignore him, then I heard the jingle… dammit. Keys. I'm feeling really smart right about now.
He twisted the lock and pulled open the door.
"Really Em?"
"Just go get a couple of pizzas so we can leave."
"Emily… stop."
"Judson. Fuck off." I said feeling my emotions start to swim at increasing speeds. I didn't want to get angry. I didn't want to flip out on him. I just wanted him to leave me alone!
"Fine." He scoffed, slamming the door shut and walking inside. I sat in the truck and watched as the girl at the front counter smiled at him, perkily bouncing around as she pressed buttons on the cash register. It irritated me even more… I forced myself to look in the other direction till I heard the bell ring as the front door open and he exited, carrying 3 large pizzas. I unlocked his door and pushed it open for him, then I promptly scooted over to my side of the cab and faced the window.
"Still pissed?" Judson asked.
"No."
"Then why won't you look at me?"
"Because I just want to go home."
"Fine. We're going."
He put the truck in drive and it was a long quiet ride back. As soon as we pulled into Bobby's I jumped out of the truck and jogged to the back of the property where I knew my brother's would be burning the body. I stopped when they came into view. The fire on the ground in front of them simmering down, how could I live without these two?
My whole world stood right in front of me, and all I could think about was standing where they stood… watching their bodies burn.
I can't.
I won't.
I began to walk up behind them, my feet on the leaves caught their attention as they both looked back at me.
"Hey Em." Sam said. I walked straight to him and wrapped my arms around him, he put his arm over me and we stood and watched the fire in silence.
"You and Judson grab some food?" Dean asked.
"Yeah. Its inside."
Dean nodded and went to walk in. Sam and I slowly followed behind him, not letting go of each other.
"You okay Em? I know I used to get nasty headaches after the visions."
"I'm fine Sam."
"Coulda fooled me…"
"I'm scared Sam. I'm really scared."
He stopped us and pulled me into a full on hug. All of a sudden I felt like maybe I'd been neglecting him lately… maybe he needed this moment as much as I did.
"Me too sweetheart." He finally said.
"Sammy. If we lose Dean… I'll still have you, right? You won't leave me alone?"
"No Em, of course not. I told you when I first came back on the road that I would never leave you again, and I meant it. You've got me forever… no matter what."
"Unless you die again." I whispered.
Sam didn't have a response, instead he just sighed and pulled us towards the house again. Once inside we sat at the table with everyone else. Judson tossed me some curious stares, I chose to ignore him for now. Chewing on my small slice of pizza quietly as everyone continued their small talk.
"Hey uh, Dean." Sam said getting his attention. "Remember that thing in the paper yesterday?"
"Stripper suffocates dude with thighs?"
"The other thing." Sam said rolling his eyes. I chuckled to myself.
"Right, the guy that walks into the E.R. and kneels over dead. His stomach's ripped out?"
"His liver, actually." I corrected. Dean rolled his eyes at me.
"Anyways, I just found out something pretty damn interesting." Sam said getting him focused again.
"What?"
"The dead body was covered in bloody fingerprints, not the victim's."
"Okay, great. My man Dave Caruso will be stoked to hear it."
"Those fingerprints match a guy who died in 1981."
"Really. So, what are we talking? Uh, walking dead? Walking, killing dead?" Dean asked his eyes starting to light up with a tinge of excitement.
"Maybe."
"Zombies do like the other white meat." Dean said thoughtfully. "Huh. Speaking of, what do you care about zombies?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well, you and Emily have been on soul-saving detail for months now. And we're three weeks out, and all of a sudden, you're interested in some hot zombie action?"
I dropped my food back on its plate… 3 weeks. Goodbye appetite. As I looked back up I caught eyes with Judson whose eyes reflected pity. I fucking hate it when he looks at me like that.
"Hey, man, you're the one who's been all gung ho to hunt. I just thought I'd be doing you a favor." Sam said nonchalantly… but you could tell there were other motives at play.
"Hey, no, no, no, no, no. I didn't say I didn't want to do it, okay. I mean obviously I want to hunt some zombies." Dean smiled.
"You people are un-fucking-believable." I said standing and shoving the chair back at the table.
"Kiddo come on." Dean said reaching out to grab me.
"No! Dean you come on! You have 3 fucking weeks left! And you want to run off on some bull shit zombie case? Please… remember the professor's daughter? The 'zombie' you let kill Neil! You and I both know this isn't a fucking zombie, it's just another case with some grieving loved one or some voodoo bullshit, a case that SOMEONE ELSE can take."
"Okay, fine, whatever." Dean said before he stormed out the back door. I stood and felt everyone's eyes fall on me.
"Emily, we need to take this one ourselves. Trust me." Sam said standing up and going outside after Dean.
"Sorry about dinner Bobby, I'm going to bed."
"Darling maybe we should talk about this." Bobby said softly. I looked between him and Judson. I shook my head back and forth and quickly backed out of the room, walking up the stairs and locking the door behind me as I entered the purple room I've always claimed as my own. I walked over to the window and opened it, climbing out to sit on the roof.
I remember sitting on this roof almost a year ago. Minus about 3 weeks. Right after Dean made the deal… not sure what was up or what was down. Not sure what was happening to me… to our family.
And now here I sit almost a year later and nothing is better.
Nothing has improved.
Nothing has been fixed.
If anything its all just gotten worse… harder.
And just like a year ago I listened as footsteps made their way through the bedroom. Green eyes looked at me through the open window… but this time it wasn't Dean who climbed out that window and sat next to me.
It was the other green eyed asshole.
"What do you want?" I asked not looking at him.
"To make this easier on you."
"Unless you know a way to save Dean and not get Sam killed in the process then you're not gonna be of much help."
"Emily… We're all doing everything we can."
"Its not enough. Why are we chasing stupid cases? Or pushing me to be careful when I could be useful? Why aren't we charging in guns blazing right now? We need to be doing something more."
"Dean's not going to let you get more involved… he doesn't think it's safe for you, and I kind of agree."
"Just leave me alone, okay?"
"No."
"You can't say no."
"I just did… I'm not leaving Em."
"I just want to be alone for a few minutes." I said my voice cracking on the last few words.
"Babe please…" He reached out to me, I sat still with the exception of my quivering lip. I slowly felt like the grip I had on myself was slipping. So I stood and went back through the window before I fell into a complete mess on the roof. Judson followed me but I didn't turn around when he called out my name. I kept walking… down the stairs, past the empty couch, and out on the porch where I ran straight into Dean.
"De… I-I'm sorry." I blubbered immediately catching him off guard. He reacted as naturally as he always has, just holding me and allowing me to get it all out of my system. At some point the open door that I'm sure Judson was standing in closed, and Dean moved us to sit on the old wooden swing.
We sat until my sobs turned into sniffles.
"Hey kiddo. Let's take a day off." He said taking me off guard.
"De we can't."
"Yes we can. I make the rules around here and I say we take a day off. Me and you out on the road. Like the old days." He smiled.
"We still gotta find the colt, and the demon, and there's too much to do."
"Babygirl, look at me… I don't care. You and Sammy are the only thing I care about. Sam's holding it together but you're not. And you haven't been for a while now. You need a break. And honestly I'd like one last hoo-rah."
"… one last hoo-rah. Meaning you don't think any of this will work."
Dean sighed.
"That's not what I mean kiddo. I just miss seeing you smile."
"De. I love you, and I love what you're trying to do. But the entire time I wouldn't be able to enjoy it. I'm not giving up on this, any of it. We fight till the very last second, remember?"
"Yeah… I do." He said sadly.
"So we keep fighting."
"Okay kiddo, we keep fighting."
"… But if you really want to take this case it might help to step back for a day or so and get a new perspective on things."
"Really?! We can go?" He asked with bright eyes.
"Well how often do we get to hunt zombies?" I grinned back.
…
Sam and I stood on one side of the table while Dean and the coroner stood on the other. The body was days old now, and you could tell.
"Yeah, the rest of the body was intact. The liver was the only organ missing." The coroner began.
"Now, where the liver was ripped out, did you happen to notice any...ah...teeth marks?" Dean asked. The coroner looked at him like he was a dumbfuck. It was kinda entertaining.
"Can I see your badges?" He asked then looking between the three of us.
"Of course, sure." Sam said as we all pulled them out.
"Fine. So you're cops and morons." The corner mumbled. I had to choke down a laugh, Dean shot me the bet bitch face I've ever seen.
"Excuse me? No, no. We're very smart." Dean argued with an unamused laugh. I elbowed him to tell him to shut up.
"The liver was not ripped out. It was removed. Surgically. By someone who knew their way around a scalpel. Didn't you read my report?"
"Of course we did. Oh, it was riveting. It was a real page-turner, just delightful." I smiled at him. He stared at me completely unamused.
"You done?" He asked me.
"Yeah. Ima go now…" I said turning to leave, Dean and Sam followed closely behind.
"So." I mumbled as we walked out to the hall to meet back up with Judson. "That kind of punches a hole in our zombie theory, huh, that scalpel thing?"
"Yeah, zombie with skills, Dr. Quinn, medicine zombie."
"Maybe we're on the wrong track, looking for hacked-up corpses."
"What should we be looking for?" Judson asked as we walked up.
"Survivors. This isn't zombie lunch. This is organ theft." He told him. Judson nodded and moved to walk beside me.
"So no zombies huh? Gotta admit I'm pretty disappointed."
"Well I hope that this means we can bail and get back to the demon." I mumbled so that my brothers wouldn't hear.
"Somehow I don't see Sam or Dean running out on a case, zombies or no zombies."
"Unfortunately that's true."
"So where to now?"
"Find a living victim."
…..
"I told the cops all of this yesterday. I don't want to talk about it anymore."
"It's just a couple of questions, sir." I smiled to him sweetly.
"Hey, lady. I just got my kidney stolen. I'm tired."
"We'll be out of here quick. Don't you want to get the guy?" Judson asked him.
"Will it get me back my kidney?"
I literally had to bite my tongue not to spew off at this asshole… you know. Maybe this is just his karma coming back around.
"So what's the last thing you remember?" Judson asked him before I could lose my shit on him.
"Feeding my meter. I got jumped from behind...and then I wake up strapped to a table. And then the worst pain you could possibly imagine, only worse. And then I black out again. Thank God. And then I wake up screaming in some no-tell motel in a bathtub full of ice."
"Do you remember anything about the surgery – you know, what the guy looked like, any details about the room?" I asked.
"Let me think about that. Yeah...one thing is coming back to me. You know what I remember? Getting my kidney cut out of my body!"
"I swear if we have to spend one second longer in this room I'm going to cut his other fucking kidney out." I said to Judson under my breath. I quickly put his arm around me.
"Thank you for your time sir." He smiled before pushing me out of the room.
"Ugh! I hope his other freaking kidney gets ripped out! What an ass? I mean really. We're just trying to help his sorry ass."
"Chill pill Em. There's a lot of glass in here."
"Lets just go back to the motel… please."
"Sure thing. You need anything on the way?"
"Um. Vodka?"
"I'm not falling for that one again."
I chuckled.
"I'm good then… Unless you know a grocery store that sells soul saving magic."
"We'll figure it out hun." He said kissing the corner of my forehead as I leaned into him.
"You don't believe that… but its okay. Because I do."
He grabbed my hand as he pulled onto the road and drove us back. It was pretty evident that he didn't really think we could save Dean. But he at least pretended for my sake. I guess that counts for something in this world right? A man who goes against his own belief to comfort you… Or maybe its just the ultimate form of pity.
When we walked into the motel room Sam was researching and Dean was eating, like any other typical day.
"Well our vic was an asshole, and didn't give us shit. Please tell me you two found something."
"Well… I did find something interesting." Sam smiled turning to face us. I walked and sat down next to Dean, picking at his fries.
"Oh yeah?" Judson asked.
"Yeah. The victim was stitched up with silk."
"That's… weird." I guessed.
"Yeah nowadays it is, but silk used to be the suture of choice back in the early 19th century. It was really problematic. Patients would get massive infections. The death rate was insane."
"Good times." I smiled awkwardly, Sam laughed.
"Right, so doctors, they had to do whatever they could to keep infections from spreading. One way was maggots."
"Ew.."
"Dude, I'm eating." Dean added with burger in his mouth.
"It actually kind of worked because maggots, they eat bad tissue, and they leave good tissue. And get this. When they found our guy, his body cavity was stuffed full of maggots."
"My stomach might fall out if you keep saying things like that." Judson complained sitting down across from me. I lightly tapped his foot under the table, playing footsie to not think about flesh eating maggots. He grinned at me from across the table as we played.
"Dude, I'm eating! Alright, let me get this straight. So, people are getting ganked, right?"
"Yeah."
"A little antiques roadshow surgery, some organ theft. But why is this all sounding familiar?"
"Because you heard it before. When you were a kid... from Dad." Sam smiled.
"OH!" I said catching on. "Doc Benton...real-life doctor, lived in New Hampshire, brilliant and obsessed with alchemy, especially how to live forever. So, in 1816, Doc abandons his practice and..."
"Right, yeah, nobody hears from him for like 20 years, and all of sudden, people start showing up dead." Dean continued.
"Dead or – or missing an organ or the hand or some other kind of part."
"Cause whatever he was doing was actually working. He just kept on ticking?" Judson guessed. "Parts would wear out, he'd replace them."
"But I thought Dad hunted him down and took his heart out?" I asked my brothers.
"He did, I guess the Doc must have plugged in a new one." Sam shrugged.
"All right, where's he doing the deed?" Dean asked.
"According to this, Benton's picky about where he sets up his lab. He likes dense forest with access to a river or stream or some kind of freshwater."
"Why?" Dean asked with a mouth full of food.
"Because that's where he likes to dump the bile and intestines and fecal matter."
I silently gagged to myself. Dean made a disgusted face, but never put his burger down.
"Lost your appetite yet?" Sam asked him with a wide grin. Dean stared between Sam and the burger pensively. Then. He took another bite.
"Oh baby, I can't stay mad at you."
"You're disgusting De."
"Tomorrow we'll scope out the local greenery. See if we can find some isolated cabins not far from here." Sam suggested.
"Think he's dumb enough to stay in town after all this?"
"I think it's a good place to start if nothing else."
"Okay. I'm gonna go out and grab my bags."
"I'll come help." Judson offered.
"No sex in the car!" Dean yelled with food in his mouth as we walked out the door.
I laughed as we got to the impala and popped the trunk, Judson reached in and grabbed my bags, I took the small make up bag at the back of the trunk, but when I grabbed it everything fell out and scattered, apparently I left it unzipped.
"Shit." I mumbled as I began packing things back into it, Judson laughed at me and used his one free hand to help.
"What's this?" He said holding the little pill bottle I covered in black sharpie.
"Oh, nothing. Some medicine from a while back."
"What for?" He asked suspiciously as he set down the bags and used his other hand to open them.
"I don't remember, I had the flu or something." I said getting anxious.
"Emily these aren't antibiotics. What are they? Why did you cover up the script?" He asked with a little more force in his tone.
"I don't know! Just give them back!" I said reaching for them, but he pulled away.
"Not a chance in hell till I know what they are."
"They're personal, why the fuck does it matter?"
"Do Sam and Dean know what they are?"
"No! Just. Give them back… please."
"Emily, what are they?"
I sighed and leaned against the impala.
"Klonopin." I finally said.
"What?! Why would you have those?"
"I went undercover for a case and saw a shrink, he found out about my panic attacks and wrote me a script. Said that they would help me learn to be less dependent on Dean to stop them."
"Does Dean know you have these? Have you taken any of them?"
"No he doesn't know, and yeah. Just a couple of times when I was really worked up over something."
"Like what?"
"I don't know Judson! Why are you making a big deal about this?"
"Because it is a big deal Em, these things are highly addictive. I mean yeah they can help but only if you're being careful using them. So again I'll ask- when did you take them?"
"Once the day we went to see Luke, and a few times when I wake up from the nightmares. They just help me to go back to sleep sometimes."
"You took these while you were with me?!"
"What the hell is the problem here? I took them like they're prescribed! It's not like I downed a whole bottle."
"How often do you take them?"
"Not often… just a few times a week when I'm really exhausted and need to stop waking up all night."
He shook his head in frustration.
"If you can't sleep, come to me. I'll help… I don't like the idea of you taking these without anyone knowing about it. You should tell at least one of your bothers."
"No way! And don't you say a word or I'll never trust you again!"
"Emily that's not fair."
"Look- you would have never known had they not just fallen out of my bag, okay? I've had them for over a year now and I've not even used half the bottle. It's pretty obvious that I'm not addicted to them so please, just leave things alone."
"I don't like this… I don't like this at all."
"If I promise to come to you before taking them will you give them back and drop this?"
He stared at me while he considered it, I could see he was really weighing it out. I held a steady gaze, staring into eyes as green as emeralds. Flecks of yellow close to the center… he really is hot.
"Fine." He said bringing me out of my daze. "I'll give them back, but you come to me first before taking one. Deal?"
"Deal. I promise."
He slowly handed them back to me and I tucked them back in the bag, closing the trunk and walking back in to Sam and Dean getting ready for bed.
"I'm gonna head over to my room for the night, see yall in the morning." Judson said as he set down my bags.
"I'll get coffee in the morning, so don't waste your time making some." Sam offered.
"Sounds good man, good night."
"I'll be right back De." I said going to walk out with him.
"Five minutes, then I'm coming over there." He said not even bothering to open his eyes.
"Sir yes sir." I laughed. I stepped out behind Judson and followed him as he leaned against his door. I stepped forward and leaned my head against his chest. Listening to the steady beat of his heart as his arm wrapped around me.
"I kinda wish I could come to bed with you."
"I wish you could too Em." He said as he kissed the top of my head and ran his hands through my hair. I Tilted my head up to look at him, my chin resting on his sternum.
"Promise me if you don't fall asleep you'll come over, don't just take those okay? I don't like it."
"Why does it bother you so much?"
"Honest answer?" He sighed.
"Yes. Always." I nodded.
"Emily you're a little unstable right now. I don't mean that offensively or to put you down, but right now it would be really easy for you to get hooked on something like that. I just… I worry about you. I don't want life to get any harder on you than it already is."
"Okay. I won't take them."
"Really?"
"Really… I mean they help but not enough that I would rather take them then cuddle up next to you." I smiled. He grinned.
"You really should get some sleep. You need it."
"I'll try."
He leaned down and kissed me softly… then with more vigor. I traced my hands up under his shirt and up the sides of his rib cage. His slid into the back pockets of my jeans, gently squeezing. When he did instinct took over and I pushed him against the door, nails dragging across his back as his tongue slid against mine.
"Emily!" Dean's voice cut us off and caused me to jump back. I turned to see Dean glaring at me from our doorway. I shook my head at him and finally let go of Judson. I turned and waved once more before going in the doorway. Dean still glaring the entire time.
"C'mon Dean." I said as I stepped in and grabbed his hand, pulling him in behind me.
"Why do you two have to be so gross?"
"Coming from the man that made me sit in the car during his one night stands?"
"That was me. Not you."
"Oh- I forgot. I'm the only Winchester not allowed to have sexual urges."
Dean cringed.
"DON'T. Say those words. I can't sleep when you say things like that."
I laughed and rolled my eyes.
"Sam. Tell him he's ridicioulous."
"You're both ridiculous. Let's go to bed."
…
"Hey. Think I finally got a bead on Bela." Bobby's voice rang out through the phone speaker while we gathered at the back of the car to listen.
"We're listening." Dean replied.
"Rufus Turner."
"Who's that? Like a Cleveland steamer?"
"He's a hunter, or he used to be."
"And now?" I asked.
"Hermit mostly. Does a little selling on the side. Anyway. I put the word out on Bela months ago. He just called. Said a woman got in touch, wanted to buy some things."
"And he thinks it's Bela?"
"British accent, went by the name Mina Chandler."
"She's used that before. Well, it's kinda of a sloppy move, isn't it? Getting in contact with one of your old friends." Dean asked.
"Friend? Haven't laid eyes on him in fifteen years. He's not the Christmas card type. I doubt she knows I know him. Canaan, Vermont."
"Thanks, Bobby. We're on our way."
"One other thing. Take a bottle of Johnnie Walker Blue."
"Uh.. okay." Dean said hanging up.
"So are we going?!" I asked excitedly.
"Yup. Lets go get packed up."
"What? Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on a second." Sam interrupted.
"Come on. Get your stuff. The clock's ticking Sam."
"Look, I think we should stay here and finish the case."
"Are you insane? Sammy this is our chance!" I told him.
"Emily, there's no way she still has the Colt! That was months ago! She probably sold it the second she got it."
"Well, then I'll kill her. Win-win." I smiled.
"Em…"
"No! Sam we gotta go! This is our chance! Dean? Help here!"
"Sam. We're going." Dean said flatly. Judson stood carefully, not weighing in on one side or the other.
"No!" Sam yelled.
"Why the hell not?"
"Dean, this, this here. Now. This is what's gonna save you." Sam pleaded.
"What? Chasing some Frankenstein?"
"Chasing immortality. Look, Benton can't die. We find out how he did it, we can do it to you."
"Sam. What are you talking about?" I asked confused. How could we do that? Doc is basically corpses sewed together. NO way in hell is Dean gonna go for that.
"Dean you have to die before you go to hell, right? So, if you can never die, then..." Sam shrugged.
"Wait, wait, wait. Wait a second. Did you know that this was Doc Benton from the jump?" Dean asked in the dangerously calm tone.
"No…. Maybe. I was…. Look, I was hoping.
"So the whole zombie thing, it was lying to me?"
"I didn't wanna say anything until I was sure, Dean. All I'm trying to do is find an answer here."
"No. What you're trying to do is chase Slicy McHackey here. And to kill him? No. You wanna buy him a freaking beer. You wanna study him."
"I was just trying to help."
"You're not helping! You forget that if I welch on this deal, you die. Guess what, living forever is welching."
"Fine! Then, whatever the magic pill is, I'll take it too!"
"Sam… what about the hell hounds? This isn't going to work. They'll tear you to shreds no matter what body you're walking around in." I added. Dean nodded in agreeance.
"Emily this can work! Please trust me on this, I don't want to lose him either and THIS could work!"
"Oh, what is this? Sid and Nancy? No. It's just like Bobby's been saying. We kill the demon who owns the contract and this whole damn thing wipes clean. That's our best shot." Dean said.
"if you had the Colt, Dean, who are you gonna shoot? We have no idea who holds the ticket."
"Well, I'll shoot the hellhounds then before they slash me up. Now, you coming or not?" Dean said putting things in the trunk.
"I'm staying here." Sam said quietly.
"Sammy no. Please it never works well for us when we split up!"
"No, you're not. 'Cause I'm not gonna let you wander out in the woods alone to track some organ stealing freak." Dean argued.
"You're not gonna let me?" Sam challenged.
"No, I'm not gonna let you."
"How are you gonna stop me?"
"I'll stay with him, back him up." Judson offered.
"No. You need to watch her, she's on a demon's kill list and that was the agreement for you tagging along. She needs you. Look- Dean we're trying to do the same thing here."
"Sammy please come with us… I don't like leaving you here. Please don't make us do that."
"Emily. I have to. I have to see this through."
"No! Dean, tell him he can't stay!" I yelled.
Dean stood and stared at Sam. I didn't like where this was going.
"We're going… but if you wanna stay. Stay."
"No! Dean this is a bad idea! Nothing has ever worked out on the basis of us separating… please. Why can't you just come with us Sam!"
"I'm sorry Em, but I'll finish this up and meet you guys after okay? I promise." He said moving in to hug me. I stood with my arms crossed, not hugging him back.
"Sammy, be careful." Dean nodded to him, He nodded back. Then he grabbed his bag from the trunk and started walking towards town.
"C'mon Em, lets get going." Judson said putting his hand on the small of my back.
"This isn't right." I whispered walking Sam walk.
"He'll be okay kiddo, come on. We got haul ass before she takes off again." Dean called out as he started the car. Judson pulled me towards the car and opened the door. I finally got in, sliding in next to Dean.
He quickly pulled out onto the road, Judson in the backseat looking at me through the rearview mirror.
"De. Does this not feel familiar to you?"
"Its okay Em, we're not splitting up. Its just temporary for a day or so. He'll be back in no time."
I slumped down in the seat and tried to convince myself this wouldn't be like any other time Sam left… But life for the Winchesters does usually take the worst possible turn in any situation.
….
"This is the place?" I asked as we pulled up in front of an old run down house in the middle of a fairly plain neighborhood.
"Lets go find out." Dean smiled. I grabbed the bottle of whiskey and followed him. He hit the buzzer and I waited impatiently. Tapping my foot.
"What?" A voice came in over a PA system.
"Hi, uh, Rufus?" Dean asked.
"Yeah, even if I am, the question is still the same. What?"
"Uh, We're the Winchesters. Friends of Bobby Singer's."
"So?"
"Geez… this guy is friendly." I mumbled to Judson. He nodded in agreeance.
"You c-called him this morning." I stuttered awkwardly.
"So?"
"Uh… you told Bobby about a British chick who made contact with you." Dean continued.
"And so?"
"You know where she is?"
"Yeah."
"Great. Could you tell me where I could find her?"
"No."
"No?! What the fuck does he mean no?"
"Calm down Em, let Dean handle it." Judson whispered in my ear, his hands rubbing my shoulders. I mean seriously?! You have the answer to the world's biggest problem and you say no?! What the FUCK!
"Look, Rufus, man..." Dean begins but then the front door flew open. Revealing a very grumpy dark skinned man.
"Look, let me point something out to you. You are knocking at my door, so don't "Look, man" me. I'm not your man."
"I'm sorry, sir."
"All right, let me tell you a little story. See, once upon a time, Bobby called me, asked me to call him if I got a whiff of this Bela Talbot. I got a whiff. I called. The end."
"Please sir. If you could just tell us where she is, its extremely important that we find her." I pleaded.
"Winchesters, right?"
"Yes sir." I nodded.
"Girl, do I look like I'm here to help you?"
I stood speechless. Unsure of how to respond to that.
"Now get the hell of my property, all of you."
"You can't d-" I started to yell but Judson flew a hand over my mouth and Dean stood between Rufus and I taking over.
"All right, yeah, fair enough. I got one more question for you, though. See, I got this, uh, this bottle of scotch, and... uh, is this considered good?" Dean asked lifting the bottle of whiskey. Rufus stared at it carefully.
"Fine. Come in."
Rufus led us into the surprisingly clean house, and into the kitchen where he grabbed a couple of glasses and sat at the table, we all sat down as well. Rufus poured him and Dean a glass.
"Bottoms up." Dean smiled as they clinked glasses and downed the drink in one gulp.
"You know, I don't even bother drinking unless it's this stuff. Nectar of the Gods, I'm telling you." Rufus smiled.
"Yeah, it's a nice change, you know. Most of my whiskey comes from a plastic jug." Dean laughed, Rufus joined in. "So, Bela was here because..."
"She wanted to buy a couple of things, which is gonna take me some time to round up."
"Where is she now?" I asked.
"Can I ask you something?" Rufus said leaning into Dean- ignoring me.
This fucking guy better be of help or I'll gut his ass.
"Sure." Dean nodded.
"You got three weeks left. Why are you wasting your time chasing after that skinny, stuck-up English girl?"
My blood ran cold for a moment… how does this man know anything about us?
"How do you know that?" Dean asked him.
"Because I know things. I know a lot of things about a lot of people."
"Is that so?" I asked suspiciously.
"I know ain't no peashooter gonna save his ass."
"What makes you so sure?" Judson asked with genuine curiosity, unlike my burning irritation.
"Cause that's the job, kid. Even if you manage to scrape out of this one, there's just gonna be something else down the road. Folks like us...there ain't no happy ending. We all got it coming."
"Well, ain't you a bucket of sunshine?" Dean asked awkwardly.
"I'm what you've got to look forward to if you survive. But you won't." Rufus smiled raising another glass.
"What the fuck is wrong with you!" I finally blurted out.
"Sit down and hush girl, this is grown up stuff." He said taking another drink. I stood up and slapped the cup out of his hand.
"NO! You sit down and shut up! This is my brother and he's going to hell in three weeks unless I can save him! So either tell us where Bela is or fucking drop dead like the useless piece of shit you are!"
"EMILY! GO!" Dean yelled standing up and getting between us.
Rufus stared at me with no emotion on his face. As if nothing I said mattered to him in the least. I felt warmth roll down my cheeks, and my hands begin to shake. I knew if I didn't do as Dean said then every glass in this man's house would be shattered in seconds. So I turned and stalked off out the door. Stopping on the porch to try and take a deep breath. Pacing back and forth for a few minutes before the front door opened again. Judson stepped outside.
"I'm sorry! I was just so scared he wouldn't tell us and now he's not going to tell us anything! I just need to know where she is." I cried.
"Whoa whoa whoa Em, calm down its okay." He said as he placed a hand on either side of my face. "Dean can fix it okay? He's working on it… It's okay. Take a breath."
"I-I feel like I can't breathe!"
"Shhh. Its okay babe, Just focus on me. I got you."
"I-I want Dean!" I cried.
"Okay okay, he'll be out in a few minutes, let's go sit in the car."
Judson walked me down to the car and sat rocking us back and forth until Dean finally came out the front door and walked towards us.
"Emily sweetheart you've gotta breathe." Dean said when he got to us.
"I don't know how to make her stop." Judson said quietly to Dean.
"Em, look at me. Its okay. We got her okay?"
"I didn't mean to m-make him angry-y De, I-I'm sorry!"
"Emily its fine he told me everything okay? We're okay. We got her."
"We have her? Wh-where is she?"
"In a motel in town, c'mon lets go get this colt huh?"
I nodded up and down an Dean ran around, getting in and starting the car. I used the ride there to pull myself back together, Judson sitting with me patiently the whole time. It really is amazing that in the middle of all this bullshit, he fell into my life. I don't know how to explain it.
…
"Okay. You two stay out of sight, when she comes in I'll grab her. I want you to only coming out after I have her pinned. Got it? Stay where you've got a good line of sight." Dean said setting up in Bela's empty motel room so we could be ready for her return.
It wasn't but maybe twenty minutes after we got into position that the lock on the door turned. My hair stood straight up. I want this to work so bad… I want this colt so bad.
Please God let this work…
The door opened and I heard Bela step in, then the door slammed shut and I could hear the shuffling of bodies.
"Where's the Colt?" Dean's voice filled the silence.
"Dean." Bela said calmly. "Where are your lovely siblings?"
"Present." I stood and smiled, Judson behind me.
"Well now that doesn't look quite like Sam… not as cute if you ask me." She said eyeing Judson.
"No extra words Bitch." Dean said quietly to her.
"It's long gone, across the world by now."
"You're lying." I quickly accused. "Dean grab her bag." Dean took it from her and began to dump it out… No colt.
"I'll call the buyer. Speak Farsi?"
Dean yanked her forward against him.
"What the hell are you..." She began to ask but then he quickly began to frisk her, finding her gun and holding up to her.
"Don't flatter yourself." He smiled. He flipped on the lights with the end of his gun, keeping hers in his other hand and then pointed it back at her.
"Don't move." He said as he tossed her gun to me. I smiled at her.
"What are you going to point my own gun at me?"
"I don't need a gun to take you down bitch."
"Oh yes, that's right. I forgot about your special little talents… it's a shame really."
"Why is that?"
"You don't know what they are do you? Where they come from… how they came to be in your possession."
"And you do?" I asked crossing my arms.
"No silly girl, I have no interest in that… but I'm sure you do."
"Shut up Bitch." Dean yelled. "Emily don't listen to her, she's just trying to create a distraction."
"I told you I don't have it." She told him.
"Oh, yeah, I'm definitely gonna take your word for it."
"It's gone. Get on a plane if you must. Track down the buyer. You might catch up to him eventually."
Dean gets tired of digging and coming up Empty, Judson also hadn't found anything during his search on the other side of the room. Dean crossed the room quickly and put the gun to Bela's head.
"Are you going to kill me?" She asked him calmly.
"Oh, yeah."
"You're not the cold-blooded type."
"You mean like you? That's true. See, I couldn't imagine killing my parents."
Bela's face quickly fell into shock, but she recovered just as quickly.
"I don't know what you're talking..."
"Yes, you do. You were, what, 14? Folks died in some shady car accident. Police suspected a slashed brake line, but it was all too crispy to tell. Cut to little Bela...Oh, I'm sorry, Abby...inheriting millions."
"How did you even..."
"We know people who know things." I told her sarcastically. "Let me guess… this is something you're interested in right? Thought you might be."
"Doesn't matter anyways." Dean added.
"They were lovely people. And I killed them. And I got rich. I can't be bothered to give a damn. Just like I don't care what happens to you." She smiled to Dean emotionlessly.
My hand raised and all at once the feeling of fire in my veins erupted. She was thrown back against the door and began gasping for air.
"Emily… don't do this." Judson whispered from behind me. Dean looked between her and I nervously. Bela's face was painted with panic. She struggled to move from the door or put her hands to her throat but something stopped her from doing so.
"Emily let her go…" Dean finally said backing up to stand beside me. I slowly and reluctantly lowered my arm. Feeling the fire turn into smoldering ambers, Bela fell to the floor and coughed, raking in air as the color came back to her face.
"Dean we can kill her. Right here right now. No one will care."
He shook his head at me. She crawled away from the door and to the couch, standing again.
"You're not worth it." He told her, motioning for us to leave. Bela didn't move or open her mouth as Dean and Judson left the room one after the other, I was almost out the door when I turned around.
"Remember this… If I lose him. I'm coming after you first."
I shut the door behind me and followed the boys down the hall. Once in the car Dean's phone began to ring.
"Yeah, Sam?"
"Did you get the Colt?" He asked. Dean placed the phone on speaker.
"What do you think?" I asked solemnly.
"So, does that mean Bela is, uh..."
"No, no, she deserves to die a dozen times over, but I couldn't do it. Em sure scared the shit out of her though."
"Dean..." Sam sighed.
"I'm really screwed, Sammy."
Hearing the disappointment in Dean's voice brought instant tears to my eyes. I slid over to him and wrapped my arms around him, he leaned his head down on top of mine. I did everything I could to bite back a sob.
"No, you're just.." Sam tried but couldn't find the words to say.
"But you were right. Bela was a goose chase. The Colt's gone, and this time I'm really screwed, Sam."
"Maybe not. Look, Dean, I found Benton's cabin."
"You okay? Was he there?"
"Yeah."
"Did you kill him?" I asked, my voice weak and shaky.
"No."
"What do you mean, no?" Dean asked him.
"Dean, please just listen for a second. I found his lab book, and it has the formula."
"What, the live-forever formula?"
A glimmer of hope took hold of me. I prayed this could be the hail mary we've been waiting for.
"Yeah."
"Great, let me guess. I got to drink blood out of a baby's skull?"
"No, that's the thing. It's not black magic. There's no blood sacrifice or anything. It's just science, Dean. Very, very extremely weird science, but..."
"Wait, wait, wait. What are...What are you saying? You think...
"Dean, I think it might be doable. I mean, I know we've hit a lot of walls, but I...I think this formula, I think it might be it. This could save you."
"What about hell hounds?" I asked.
"We can find ways to ward them off, hide our scents. Always stay moving like we do anyways." Sam suggested.
"Okay, so, this formula, what do we need?" Dean asked.
"Well, I mean, look, look, we're not in the clear yet. There are still things that I don't get..." Sam said distractedly. Then there were muffled sounds, Sam's muffled voice in a struggle, then it sounded as if his phone was dropped.
"Sam?! Sammy!" Dean yelled.
"Oh god… Dean! What's happening?" I asked panicked.
"Sam!" Dean yelled. But there was no reply. The line disconnected.
"Dean where did he go?!"
"I don't know!" He yelled back frustrated as he slammed the car into gear and took off.
"I'm going to call him again." I said digging for my phone, hands shaking.
"Emily babe take a breath." Judson said from behind me, leaning over the seat.
I dialed Sam… again and again and again.
"Dammit Sam just answer!"
"Emily… come back here and sit with me for a while." Judson said calmly as he put his hand over the phone, stopping me from dialing again.
"I-I I need him to answer the phone, you don't understand he has to answer it."
"I know Em, c'mon, let Dean drive in peace for a while. He's stressed out too." Judson whispered in my ear.
I nodded and climbed over the seat. Judson slid up against the door and motioned for me to lay down with my head on his lap. I did as he asked and tried to convince myself that if I could just sleep we'd be there by the time I woke up, or at least closer to there.
I laid quietly for a while, a few sniffles and tears escaping and falling onto Judson's jeans. He simply sat in silence, letting his finger tips trail my hairline, Its like all of us had so much we could say, but none of us knew how to say anything at all.
I just want Sam to be okay.
I just want to save Dean.
I just want to be a functioning human being again.
I just want things to get better.
Or at least stop getting worse…
Somewhere between my sniffling and silent pity partying I eventually fell asleep. Only to be woken up by the sound of a car door opening. I jumped awake and shot straight up, caught off guard by how dark my surroundings were.
"Hey, whoa. Take it easy, we're here." Judson said calmly. I could not see faintly in the darkness Dean digging in the trunk.
"Where are we?"
"Benton's cabin."
"Sam…" I mumbled more to myself then anything. Then I quickly got out of the car and met Dean at the trunk. He began handing me weapons, and I silently began loading them and sliding them into open pockets in both mine and Dean's jackets.
"We good?" He asked. Judson and I nodded.
"Stay behind me Em. Judson, go round back. I don't want this bastard getting away."
"No problem."
I followed Dean into the front door of the unlocked cabin. It was old, dusty, and obviously hadn't been used in years. It was the perfect hiding spot really. We could hear voices off in the distance, somewhere in the back of the cabin.
"Sam… Dean that's Sam's voice!" I whispered to him frantically. He nodded and we picked up the pace as we cleared each room silently, once we hit the very back room we found plastic traps hanging from the ceiling, lights and shadows moving behind them. Dean quickly ducked in between them and I could hear as Doc Benton taunted my brother who was strapped to a table, a tool in his hand.
Doc moved it to where it almost touched Sam's face and then 3 shots rang out in my ears. Dean fired, but the Doc only stood there, then he turned to face us.
"Shoot all you want." He said walking forward with his arms open and a sadistic smile on his face. Dean fired twice more, and me three more times.
"Emily run!" Dean yelled as he and the Doc began to push each other around the room. I dodged out of the plastic tarps and then around the back of the room and in them again to cut Sam loose.
"Emily get the hell out of here!" Sam hissed.
"Not without you two assholes!"
"Dammit Emily!"
"Shut up and help me Sam! Be still!"
"A knife? What part of immortality do you not understand? Pity about the heart, though. It was a brand-new one." Benton taunted Dean.
"Good. It should be pumping nice and strong." Dean smiled holding up a bottle of choloroform. "Sending this stuff throughout your whole body. See, I picked up your little bottle upstairs and dipped the knife in it."
Dean barely finished his sentence before the Doc collapsed. Once he was on the floor Dean rushed over to help me free Sam.
"Judson!" I yelled, calling for him to come inside. I heard footsteps rapidly approaching us, he stepped in cautiously. Gun raised.
"Dude… he looks like a quilt my grandmother would stitch together." He said looking at the Doc on the ground.
"Well he won't be out forever, what do we do with him?" I asked looking up to Dean as Sam climbed off the table.
"I don't know." Sam sighed, catching his breath. We decided to at least tie him down until we figured things out. I the process the doctor began to stir awake.
"Oh, hiya, Doc. Wakey, wakey, eggs and bac-y." Dean smiled.
"Please." The doctor begged.
"Please what? You've been killing poor bastards for over 150 years and now you got a request? Shut up."
"No, you don't understand. I can help you. I know what you need."
"We might have to cut him up into little bits. You know, this immortality thing is a bitch." I added.
"I can read the formula for you. You know...immortality...Forever young, never die."
"Dean." Sam said catching his attention. Giving him a knowing look.
"Sam."
Sam stepped outside the room and Dean and I followed.
"Dean. I mean, we're talking hell in three weeks. Or needing a new pancreas in like half a century."
"Yeah, well, you can't exactly get those at a Kwik-E-Mart."
"It's not perfect, but it buys us more time to think of something better. We just need time, Dean. I mean, please, just...just think about it."
"No." Dean's answer was firm and hard.
"Dean, don't you want to live?" Sam asked, choking back tears himself. I placed my hand over my mouth to not let any escape my body as well.
"What he is isn't living. Look, this is simple."
"Simple?" I squeaked out. "None of this simple…"
Dean put his arm around me and got down to talk with me on an eye to eye level.
"To me it is, okay. Black or white; human, not human. See, what the Doc is is a freakin' monster. I can't do it. I would rather go to hell."
"But De… what if we can't save you any other way. What if this is the ONLY way?"
"This isn't a way babygirl. Its not… I don't want to become a monster."
"You don't understand. I can help you!" Doc Benton called out from the other room. Dean walked back in and soaked a rag in chloroform. Then he laid it over the doc's mouth. Sam moved to help him sedate the doctor. I stood in the corner of the room and silently cried…
The only two slivers of hope I had were both crushed in the same day.
What now?
"Now, I'm gonna take care of him. You can either help me or not. It's up to you." Dean said to Sam. Sam nodded.
"What do we do with him?" Judson asked.
"Lock him up… we can't kill him. But we can imprison him."
"How will be sure he doesn't get out?"
"I got an idea or two." Dean grinned.
An hour later I watched as the boys put the finishing touches on Benton's own personal lock box.
"Enjoy forever in there, Doc." Dean said as he and Sam began filling the hole with dirt. The doc's screams and pleas to be let out faded as the dirt pile in front of me grew smaller and smaller. Once we finished we wasted no time getting back to the car and as far away from this cabin as possible.
"Listen. Now that we got this problem solved, we have another one." Dean said as we walked back.
"What's that?" Sam asked.
"Bela. This was all a trap. She wanted us to find her…"
"What does that mean?" I asked confused.
"It means, we have the jump on her. We need to use it… she doesn't have much time left either."
It suddenly clicked in my head… her room. The weird smell. It was a set of herbs used to ward off demons… and hell hounds.
"So what do we do."
"Play her game… cat and mouse." Sam suggested.
We went back to the motel we had been staying at in town and set up the room, complete with occupants in the bed… granted they were blow up sex dolls, but watching Sam blow one of those up is a sight that will never leave my mind. Then we parked across the street and waited for her to pull in.
"De. Look… we got action." I said as a woman in a blonde wig approached our room."
"Okay, lets get a head start." Dean said as he quietly started the car and left the headlights off until we were out on the road headed for the highway.
"How long do we wait to call her?" I asked.
"I'm sure she's figured it out by now." Dean smiled as he pulled out his phone.
"Hiya, Bela. Here's a fun fact you may not know. I felt your hand in my pocket, when you swiped that motel receipt."
"You don't understand."
"Oh, I'm pretty sure I understand perfectly. See, I noticed something interesting in your hotel room. Something tucked above the door. An herb. Devil's shoestring? There's only one use for that. Holding hellhounds at bay. So you know what I did, I went back and I took another look at your folks' obit. Turns out they died ten years ago today. You didn't kill them. A demon did your dirty work. You made a deal, didn't you, Bela. And it's come due. Is that why you stole the Colt, huh? Try to wiggle out of your deal, our gun for your soul?"
"Yes." Bela admitted. Her voice scared and strained.
"But stealing the Colt wasn't quite enough, I'm guessing."
"They changed the deal. They wanted me to kill Sam and Emily."
"Really! Wow, demons untrustworthy. Shocker. That's, uh, kind of a tight deadline too – what time is it? Well, look at that, almost midnight."
"Dean, listen, I need help." She cried into the phone.
"We are weeks past help."
"I know I don't deserve it."
Sure as fuck right about that.
"You know what, you're right, you don't. But you know what the bitch of the bunch is? If you would have just come to us sooner and asked for help we probably could have taken the Colt and saved you."
"I know, and saved yourself. I know about your deal, Dean. "
"And who told you that?"
"The Demon that holds it. She holds mine too. She said she holds every deal."
"She?"
"Her name's Lilith."
Sam and I shared a shocked look. Dean too looked surprised by the new information.
"Why would Lilith want us dead if she holds Dean's contract? Isn't part of that contract allowing Sam to live?" I asked Judson.
"I don't know Em… I didn't expect that."
"Lilith? Why should I believe you?" Dean asked her.
"You shouldn't but it's the truth."
"This can't help you, Bela, not now. Why you telling me this?"
"Because just maybe you can kill the bitch."
"I'll see you in hell." Dean told her solemnly before hanging up the phone.
"You're not going to hell Dean." I said breaking the uncomfortable silence.
"Well. I'm fresh out of ideas. You have one?"
"Lilith. We go after Lilith. We know who the demon is, so our day wasn't a total loss. We can find a way to kill her without the colt. What about Ruby's knife? Or-or something in Dad's journal! And she's looking for us anyways! Why don't we just throw ourselves out there and let the bitch come to us."
"Are you crazy or stupid?" Dean asked me with surprising anger. I sat back a little stunned.
"Dean, take it easy." Sam warned him.
"This demon is out to KILL US ALL. Not just me! This is the same demon that wants you and Sam both skewered on a stick, probably to roast next to me in the pit! If you think for one second I'm letting you anywhere near her then you're stupid and crazy. Not a chance in hell! We will go back to Bobby's, process the new information, and regroup. End of discussion."
"But Dean we don't have time to regroup! We're losing hours just driving in this stupid car for some stupid case and stupid Bela! We need to be taking action! Not just sitting around talking about it!"
"So we can end up in an ambush? I don't think so. I will not put your life at risk to save mine, or Sam's!"
"This is horse shit! You know I can help save you! Why won't you let me help you!"
"BECAUSE I SAID SO!"
"You aren't dad so you can't say shit like that!"
"Emily calm down, this isn't helping." Judson whispered in my ear.
"NO! I'm sick of calming down, and waiting, and being patient and fucking letting everyone else have a say in this but me! If Dad was here right now he would let me help you Dean! He would WANT me to help you right now!"
"Dad isn't here! I'm the closest you'll ever get to having him back so I suggest you get used to it while you still can! Cause in 3 weeks you're going to need to grow the hell up and learn to handle shit like this on your own!"
"Don't talk to me like that!" I yelled with blurring vision, tears invading my sight without permission.
"I'll talk to you any way I want! Now sit down and shut up!"
"Stop the car!"
"No!"
"I said stop the car!" I screamed, and without warning the breaks squealed and the car came to a sudden stop, nearly throwing me over the seat. Then the entire car died.
"What the fuck did you just do?" Dean yelled as he tried repeatedly to turn the key in the ignition. I ignored him and climbed out. Walking down the side of the road back towards the town we just left.
"Come on out Lilith! You psycho fucking bitch! I'm right here!" I yelled into the darkness.
"Emily Anne Winchester! Get your sorry ass back in that car right now!" Dean yelled stomping behind me.
"Come get me bitch!" I continued to yell.
"Dammit Emily! Get back in the fucking car!" Dean yelled as he caught up to me and grabbed me by the arm.
"No! Let me go!"
Screams of protest quickly turned into Sobs as Dean began to pull me out of the road and back towards the car. My knees gave way and my shins slid against the pavement. Dean stopped pulling on my arms, and let me sit on the ground, sobbing hysterically.
"De I-I don't know w-what to do!"
"C'mon babygirl, don't do this to me. Please." He said his voice cracking at the end.
"I d-don't want you-u to go."
Dean leaned down and slid one arm under my knees, and another behind my back. I gripped him around his neck and cried as hard as I did the day my daddy died.
"Don't leave me please!" I begged between sobs as he set me down on the trunk.
"Sam… please." He said as he pulled my arms loose and stepped away. Sam stepped in where he stood, I cried even harder knowing that in just a matter of days it would be just me and Sam… only having each other to truly lean on.
I watched over Sam's shoulder as Dean walked forward onto the dark road. His hand rubbing over his face and down the back of his head.
"De please…" I cried, even though he couldn't hear it. "I-I need to fix it."
"Shhh.. Em. Breathe sweetheart. Breathe." Sam whispered.
"I-I …. Dean please! J-Just fix it!" I begged.
But he only walked farther into the darkness until I couldn't see his shadow any longer.
"Sammy please… We have to save him."
"I know sweetheart. I know."
Dean's figure eventually started to make its way out of the darkness and back into my line of sight. When he came closer I noticed his eyes were red rimmed, and his hair skewed. He linked eyes with mine and held them until he was back, standing in front of Sam and I.
"I'm sorry babygirl. I truly am…" He said as Sam stepped aside and Dean bear hugged me tighter than he has since I was a kid. I wrapped my arms around his neck, and my legs around his waist, letting myself cling to the way he smelt, his warmth, the comfort in the familiarity of every move he made.
"I'm so sorry kiddo… I'm so sorry."
I cried into his shoulder until my body had nothing left to give. When that finally happened, Dean carried me around to the side and put me down, opening the door for me to climb in next to Judson. Who patiently allowed us to settle our family drama without a witness.
Sam and Dean both got back and baby fired up without a glitch. I looked up to Judson, and met the most concerned look I'd ever seen on his face. He reached up and pushed a stray hair out of my face. I moved to sit as close to him as I could. Feeling the slightest bit safer under his arm as it draped over the back of the seat.
"Hey Em… remember what we said?" Dean finally asked.
I shook my head confused.
"We keep fighting. Okay? I promise. I'm not giving up."
I tried as hard as I could to push a half of a smile onto my face. To erase the last half hour of desperation.
"We keep fighting."