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This is a trail of memories from Gaara and Sasuke. If you're not into it, just skip this chapter.
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Defeated, he sank to the floor. The young man's body was shaking when appalled eyes finally met the adamant look of the lone Uchiha. As Gaara noticed the droplets of blood, he stopped breathing.
Sasuke curiously followed his progress of realisation and acceptance, he granted him his time and distance, but despite the past, he would not go anywhere. The look on the kazekage's face turned from shock to disbelief and eventually guilt.
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The skilled Konoha-nin seemed pleased with the result in front of his very eyes, as he felt turquoise eyes following the trail of blood on his handsome face, he wiped his lip nonchalantly.
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"I told you, I'll make you remember."
Gaara's eyes met Sasuke's as he seemed to lose the ground underneath his feet. Finally he could see the past, their hidden secret crashed him back down and he began to feel again what he had been ignoring for too long.
"Sasuke…" His voice was shaking as they both got lost in their eyes, their memories melted together and showed both what they had been through.
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Past:
In Konoha Sasuke was sitting with Sakura underneath a tree while the rest of team seven practised taijutsu nearby. "Sakura, there's a reason why I'm not together with Karin. Or with you. It's more complicated than you might think."
The kunoichi took a moment to scrutinize him. Inwardly she recalled everything he said and she tried to put the signs in line. Suddenly she felt reminded of the talk she once had with Gaara a few years ago. Discreetly she whispered "Nooo… You don't say?"
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He did not say a word and rather played with a twig in his hands.
"Some things are just not meant to be." She gave him a reassuring warm smile.
Sasuke met her gaze briefly, before he averted his eyes again. "You have him now, he's a good man, Sakura. He has a true heart and so do you. I'm glad you two found happiness together."
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"Are you happy, Sasuke?"
He ripped a few grass blades out and twisted them in between his fingers. It took him a long while before his eyes dared to meet hers again. Sakura noticed that he looked sad and lonely, very lonely. There was also self-hatred, self-loathing and the need of understanding seeping through his hard shell. She knew that look in his eyes all too well.
The kind pinkette granted him some minutes of comforting silence before she made a suggestion only for him to hear. "I think you should talk to Gaara someday."
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"About?"
"Think twice." She smiled and winked at him.
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Sasuke's eyes turned wide at her knowing and assuring look. He knew by experience she had always been a very perceptive and intelligent person, but he was stunned that she actually understood him. She did not judge him, she encouraged him instead!
Then he did the most unexpected thing she had ever seen him do since they were young: He smiled. Sasuke Uchiha smiled at her and it was a real smile! He looked relieved as immense pressure had suddenly fallen from his chest.
"I promise I won't tell anyone." Sakura whispered and returned his honest smile.
The black-haired man nodded and confirmed he would neither speak about the conversation they just shared, but he was glad they did.
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In the late afternoon after they enjoyed some tea at the hokage's living room they said their goodbyes.
Sasuke embraced Sakura and told her barely audible: "Thank you. For everything, Sakura."
Good things tend to happen after something bad, it seems.
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Gaara had not known that Sakura had laid the foundation of their future. Everything seemed to be interwoven.
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Past:
Memorial Day in Konoha, the kazekage was wondering about the strange guy on Sakura's side. He had seen him before in Suna, he had accompanied Kakashi, but something just did not fit. He remembered her obvious affiliation with the hokage, although both seemed to hide their true feelings for each other. He had known of her fling with an ANBU that went M.I.A., still he wondered how she could be so happy with that new man by her side. Temari and Shikamaru were officially a couple, she even had left Suna and Kankuro was currently dating a kunoichi from Rain. Still, his siblings wanted for him to have a relationship, too. Naruto was pushy and caught him everywhere he went. Of course he was glad to meet him again too, but he was not even able to enjoy a bite of his meal without the bubbling blonde or his siblings introducing him to girls. Everyone seemed so happy while he deep down felt lonely.
Don't worry, you'll never be alone.
I know, Shukaku.
I'm always here.
It was too much, his head was pondering, he needed a break. On his stroll he found an open standing door of a small house. He went inside and called if somebody was there, by the layer of dirt he saw the house was unoccupied and obviously left years ago. The redhead smiled and closed the door behind him.
Just a small break.
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Meanwhile the last Uchiha jumped elegantly inside of a closed market stall right next to Sakura and Tatsuo, which was used as a makeshift table to put down drinks and snack plates during the festivities. There he crouched down and quickly suppressed his chakra. The pushy Uzumaki female approached, still shouting his name like a mantra.
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"Karin, if you're looking for Sasuke-san, I've seen him talking to the hokage near the academy not long ago." Sakura spoke in a friendly tone.
The redhead turned half-way to look at her. "Oh, really? Thanks! I lost Sasuke-kun an awful while ago and I have no idea where I am right now. Konohagakure is huge, you know! In which direction…"
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Tatsuo pointed to the left: "This way. Take the second street on the right, then the third on the left and from there you go four blocks straight. You can't miss the academy. "
Karin's eyes lit up. "Thank you so much!" And then she stormed away.
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Sakura beamed at the calm and stern man beside her. "Tatsuo, that's not the right direction to the academy, not even in the slightest!"
He shrugged without any expression, "I know."
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Sasuke crawled out of his hiding place: "Thank you, Sakura and… you."
Tatsuo smiled at him with an eye-crinkle they all knew so well and it conjured a half-sided smirk on Sasuke's face. Then the Uchiha found a vacant house nearby for a new hideout.
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The moment he closed the door a dark figure formed in the shadows. "Whom are you hiding from?"
"The Uzumaki girl."
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The shady form approached and he recognised him in an instant.
"Seems like it lies in the bloodline."
"Gaara." An amused smirk formed on the Uchiha heir's face."So you're hiding from Naruto?"
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The redhead returned the smirk. "And my dear siblings. Never mix alcohol with any of them."
"I can only imagine." Sasuke chuckled.
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"Did Sakura send you here?"
"She mentioned something that I should talk to you. Honestly I don't know what I'm doing here", with a sigh he nearly bolts away.
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Gaara stops him with a digit on his lips, outside they could hear Karin searching for him. "Sasuke-kun?! Saaaasuke-kuuun?!"
"Do you want a drink? I have some fine Suna wine with me if you want?", carefully he pulled out a scroll from his pocket and unsealed a dark green bottle.
They sat down at a table in the empty house and share the bottle, Sasuke go them wine glasses they found on a kitchen counter.
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To all appearances the great Uchiha had accidentally chosen the same hiding place as no-one other than the kazekage, who had a hard time to flee from his drunken siblings and the tipsy blonde wannabe-hokage. He told him that they want to take this opportunity to marry him off to some annoying fangirl. Luckily his personal ANBU guards secured the area and would inform them early enough to escape again.
"Usually nobody dares to call me by my first name. "
Sasuke amused smirk, "I knew you long before you became kazekage."
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Gaara amused, "I must say you have guts, Uchiha. I'm kind of impressed."
They clinked glasses and soon opened another bottle of precious Suna wine.
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The wooded chairs turned out to be not as comfortable as the sofa in the next room. There Sasuke told him about his soon to be godchild, the other twin should be Sakura's godchild. Gaara told him about the little rest he had gotten within the last weeks and that he had not been able to sleep for most of his life. He could only fall asleep when he felt comfortable and safe.
It became late and Gaara fell asleep, Sasuke felt the urge to not leave him all alone in an empty house. Inwardly he knew about the positioned guards outside, but he persuaded himself that it would be disrespectful if he would leave him there all by himself. Somehow he felt honored as the kazekage's head came to rest on Sasuke's strong shoulder. Sasuke thought it wouldn't hurt anybody, so he decided to have a little nap too. Without anybody knowing they sleep next to each other with their heads touching here and there.
In the middle of the night they simultaneously shot up from their slumber. The tension in the room was weird and palpable.
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A very grumpy looking Uchiha grumbled, "This is your fault, Gaara."
The kazekage rose his brows, then he did something unsuspected, he laughed full-heartedly.
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"What?" The strange look on the black-haired man's face could be described as a mixture of killing mode, fear, denial, relief and merriment.
Calmly the redhead stated, "Thank you for the pleasant evening, Sasuke. It was nice to have some company while evading people."
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Sasuke made a hissing noise, but the look on his face eased up.
"You should come and visit Suna someday." It was more an adamant request than an invitation.
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"Someday." Sasuke waved Goodbye and dashed out into the night and Gaara sneaked into his given guest home on the other side of Konoha.
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Past in Suna:
Sasuke actually stepped by one day without a word. The kind kazekage invited him to have a late lunch together at his office, with tea and dates afterwards. Again they found a lot to talk about. It was the beginning of their friendship. From time to time the last Uchiha stepped by for to visit whenever his missions brought him near Suna. The enjoyed their talking and began sparring together, both shared secret scars of their pasts.
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One day Sasuke went to the kazekage's office and handed him a scroll from Konoha.
Gaara reached out and took the scroll with Sasuke's hand in his. "You could stay for a while."
The Uchiha held his breath while the kazekage's hand did not leave the back of his hand as he carefully took the scroll out of his palm. He wondered if he was just imagining things as he heard the following words: "We can help each other to get rid of our inner demons."
Frowning, Sasuke shook his grip off and left the office wordlessly.
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But after a few lonely, eye-opening nights in the desert, Sasuke returned. He looked lost and precarious as he was standing there in the middle of his office. The early night outside the window mirrored the dark of his hair which clung on him like his clothes. He was dripping wet and he had to be caught off guard by the first rainstorm in Suna in years.
Gaara handed him a wine-red towel with a smile. The trickling Uchiha returned his smile and wiped his hair.
"Are you alone?"
The Uchiha heir nodded once. "I think you are right. We both have some ghosts from the past." He had come back indeed due to curiosity and hopelessness.
The kind kazekage nodded in understanding and brought him to a generous guest room, which he could use whenever he was close by.
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Sasuke stayed for a few days and they developed a deeper friendship as they shared their stories and had surprisingly a lot in common. They both liked to spend time together and it became a habit. Gaara's siblings were glad that he had found a good friend.
During an unbent dinner at the main kitchen in the family annex with only Gaara and Sasuke in the room, their playful banter turned into an innocent first flirt. In an instant both blushed and stormed in separate directions. They did not meet again that evening, but had agreed prior to spar together on the next day.
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The last Uchiha wracked his brain if it was wise to go into the arena the next morning, but before he could make a decision his feet had already brought him there. By the look on his training partner's face he knew he had fought his qualms too.
The next thing both knew was that they tossed their concerns aside and fought hard in taijutsu. Their secret sparring match led to them being wounded by each other due to their denial, to all appearances they had both fought for their pride. The tension had ebbed away as they began laughing and Sasuke helped Gaara up from the sand. They dust their clothes off and sat down on a bench to drink some much needed water.
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"Are you alright?"
"God, your right hook feels bad. It almost knocked me out." The last Uchiha traced his aching chin.
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The kazekage chuckled which resulted in a painful grunt and rubbing his hurting ribs.
"Let's go before someone noticed how you beat up the kazekage."
Sasuke gave him a one sided smirk and pointed into the direction of the kazekage mansion. "Come on, I'll wrap you up."
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They went to Gaara's living room and he had brought a first aid kit. Gaara had two slightly broken ribs, but he did not tell his former opponent. Sasuke had a dislocated shoulder which Gaara reduced. Sasuke could not hold back a loud groan as the joint popped back in. The slight redness on Gaara's face was funny, but he was sure he had turned red as well. The noise he had made caught them both off guard. Next Sasuke took a gauze pad and poured some disinfectant on it. Then he dabbed the all the visible bruises on Gaara's arms. With a hand on his jaw he turned Gaara's surprised face into his direction, then he dabbed off the blood on his chin gently. He took a new gauze pad and softly dabbed the crack on the lower lip that started to quiver under his touch. Their eyes got lost into each other as the gauze pad fell from Sasuke's fingers and the distance in between them closed. Without thinking their lips met and Gaara hissed from the pang of his hurt lip.
Chuckling their hands tugged on clothes and lips clashed together in fervent need to feel each other.
Strong fingers explore while minds collapse, there was no time for thinking this through. Masculine grunts and erotic moans filled the room, with every stroke closer to oblivion. Gaara came first, his body shaking wildly as his eyes rolled back. Before one of them could regain their thinking, the kazekage went down and closed his lips around Sasuke's throbbing dick. He was already close and the feeling of the hot flicking around his painfully swollen tip let him fall over the edge. To stop his loud moans he took what he could find and bit Gaara in his arm.
The bite was so painful that Gaara reacted and punched him into the stomach with his other hand.
Suddenly the extent of the situation kicked in, Sasuke punched Gaara back in the gut.
Their shocked eyes met and they put some much needed distance in between each other and covered their almost naked bodies.
Without a word the Uchiha left in withdrawal.
What did we just do?!
Both were in denial, they had a few official meetings afterwards, but they did not see or hear from another in private.
Somehow Gaara was astounded by his boldness, inwardly Sasuke was impressed by Gaara's actions. They seperated without talking about the incident.
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After a few weeks the Uchiha came back again for a mission near Suna and as direct ambassador for Konoha. He still acted like nothing had ever happened, both kept it a secret, a nonverbal agreement that it would be a one time thing, a mistake, nothing more. But right then it happened again, in his office, in Sasuke's room, in Gaara's kitchen...
They agreed many times that this would be the last time, over and over again and like everytime they separated again.
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On Sasuke's next travel a few months later he secretly came by. Injured he landed on the rooftop, the redhead had been sitting there, watching the night sky like he had done so often before. Gaara bade him inside and Sasuke followed him to one of the loungers in his bedroom. There Gaara assisted him with bandaging a minor stab wound on his abdomen. Annoyed about his carelessness they start to banter. They ended up in finally having sex, rough, animalistic and filled with withdrawal, denial, built-upattraction and unfilled want. At one point both shrieked up in panic and alert of getting caught by one of the official guards who had noticed another presence in the kazekage's apartment. A potted palm tree fell down in the process from which both shared a small scar. Sasuke on his left shin and Gaara on his left upper-arm. The very same scars that brought Gaara's memory back.
The two men laughed the accident off and the tension faded, but afterwards both crawled up in denial again, although they knew that night had changed everything between them.
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Whenever Sasuke was in the village they had their secret meetings in secret places, the frequency of his visits increased even more. Gaara took the leading role in their developing relationship and Sasuke the dominant and leading role in their plays. After a while they even start sharing beds in the kazekage mansion. By dawn the Uchiha always bolted away as realisation got him and it tore hard at Gaara's heart, but after a few days he always came back and he was becoming affectionate more and more. They were still acting strange in public though.
They remember the jolt that caused that simple hand shaking in the hospital in Konoha. It was their last bodycontact before he had lost his memory.
Before he had forgotten him...
Then, he suddenly preferred Sakura's bodycontact. Visions of Sasuke hearing their nightly activities, the feeling in his heart, the realisation that he could not deny his feelings anymore and the moment he knew he would fight for him to get him back to normal rushed through Gaara's veins.
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Gaara broke down on his knees, shivering, mumbling as a mantra, "Sorry… Sorry…"
"I understand," Sasuke said in a calming tone as he knelt down and embraced him. This was a whole new level, this was the biggest non-verbal confession of an Uchiha: Getting himself down on eye level with a defeated man and giving him comfort.
Honestly he continued with his reassuring voice, "I will... do better." This was probably the biggest verbal confession of an Uchiha. The last months were not easy for him either. Nevertheless he had enough time to think and he was not able to deny his feelings anymore. He knew now what he wanted.
Softly he captured the redhead's lips with his in a loving kiss.
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"We should clean up our wounds and go to bed." Sasuke stood up and reached out to help him up. "Tomorrow will be another day."
But the wild flicker in Gaara's eyes told him he had other plans for tonight. "Will you stay for a while?"
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The last Uchiha smirked knowingly and gave him a small nod with his eyes closing briefly. He would not go anywhere, not after this all. They were finally given a chance and he would gladly take it.
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Gaara: I missed you.
"You know I can hear your thoughts, right?" The smirk on Sasuke's face turned into a very amused grin.
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Shukaku: Chakra bonding.
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Smiling sheepishly at him, Gaara rubbed the back of his head. I'm glad you do.
Quite unusually Sasuke mirrored his actions, which made the kazekage smile in content.
Sasuke: I'm glad you're back.
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