Chpt. 37 APOV:

Flashback

"Are you going to submit to me?" he screams.

"Never!" I respond defiantly.

Wack! Wack! He hits me several times across my back with a belt; I can feel the belt pierce my skin with each hit. I've never been hit like this before; I can feel the anger and pure hatred in each hit. Christian's hit me with a belt as punishment, but never with this much force. The pain from each hit is almost unbearable but I refuse to scream or given any indication of how much pain I'm in right now.

"You will be sorry!" He screams before hitting me again.

The beating continues for a long time, he only stops when I lose consciousness. I come to and find myself still tied to the cross; I must have been out of it for awhile because it's now dark outside. There's a small window that I can barely see, but right now it's the only reference I have to the time. I'm thirsty and hungry, but I'm not about to ask him for something to eat or drink. I know the baby needs me to eat, but I can't….I know the only way he will let me eat or drink is if I agree to be his submissive. Just the thought of submitting to him makes me want to puke. I was disgusted with him the moment he approached me in the club and have had the same reaction every time he has approached me. He looks at me like I'm a piece of meat and like all he can think about his fucking me. I won't give him any power or any control over me; right now this is the only thing I have control over. I try not to think about what will happen when it's not in my control; when he takes the control away from me completely.

"Are you ready to submit and start our first scene?" his voice fills the room again.

"No!" I respond.

"He's not going to come for you; if that's what you're waiting for. He's not going to pay the money," he says.

"Yes he will," I say confidently. I know that there is no way that Christian wouldn't pay a ransom; I'm sure of it.

"He's informed me you aren't worth the twenty million dollars I want," He says. "He told me you are mine to do with what I want."

"You're lying!" I scream back.

"Just wait and see….when he doesn't show up you will have no choice but to submit to me," he says in a sly voice.

"I will never willingly submit to you! You can rot in hell you bastard!" I scream.

Wack! He's changed from a belt to a whip of some type. I squeeze my eyes tight and desperately try to focus on something else as the beating continues. I've never felt pain like this in my entire life, but I vow to not let him see that I am weak. Eventually the pain takes over and darkness once again finds me.

"Ana! ANA!" I hear a voice calling me, but as hard as I try I can't seem to open my eyes.

I feel a hand touching my arm and immediately try to pull away; fearing what he might do to me next. As I try to move away, I can tell that I'm no longer tied to the cross but on a soft bed which scares me even more. The last thing I remember was being tied to the cross and him beating me over and over again while screaming at me about everything that Christian and I took away from him. I was able to understand bits and pieces of what he was saying, the reason for his obsession with me was becoming more and more clear as his ramblings continued. Although he wasn't very close to me, I could smell the cheap liquor on his breath and knew that he was drunk or at least was drinking the entire time he had me.

"Ana…baby please wake up…." A voice says softly.

As I force my heavy eyes open, I am temporarily blinded by the bright light and immediately close them again.

"Hold on baby….I'll fix it," the voice says.

I hear shuffling around the room and the next time I force my eyes open room has been dimmed and it no longer hurts to open my eyes. I glance around the unfamiliar room, trying to make sense of it all. Christian is standing next to my bed, when his eyes meet mine he slowly takes hold of my hand and I have to force myself not to flinch at his touch.

"Thank God you woke up," he sighs as he sits next to me.

"The baby?" I whisper, both because my throat is very sore and because I'm almost afraid to know the answer.

"The baby is okay, the doctors have been monitoring for contractions but you haven't had any. The doctors say he or she has a very strong heartbeat," he explains.

I breathe a heavy sigh of relief hearing that the baby is okay; I was certain that I was going to lose the baby because of what that bastard was doing to me.

"How do you feel? I should get a doctor or a nurse…" Christian starts to ramble.

"I could use some water," I reply but Christian is already up and heading to the door.

A few minutes later a doctor and nurse return with Christian. The nurse immediately checks my vitals from the various machines I now notice that I am hooked up to. I have no idea what everything does but she writes down the information vigorously before handing my chart to the doctor.

"Hello Ms. Steele. I am Doctor Humphrey and I have been overseeing your case since you were admitted," a young woman introduces herself.

"How long I have been here?" I ask.

"Almost 36 hours," she answers.

"When can I go home?" I ask quickly; all I can think about is getting back to Escala. Physically my body feels sore and stiff but I don't feel any pain like I was feeling when he was beating me. I can only assume that no internal or permanent damage was done since I'm not in pain….but I suppose I could be on pain medication which would mask the pain.

"We will want to keep you for at least another 24 hours for observation but after that I see no reason for you to remain here. You have several stitches and other cuts that will need to be bandaged regularly but overall you are very lucky in that none of your bones were broken," she interrupts my thoughts.

Lucky is not the word I would have chosen to describe what happened to me but before I can respond Christian speaks up.

"I have arranged for nursing staff to come to our home daily to tend to her injuries, any other recommendations you have please contact my mother – her information is in Ana's chart; she will provide me with the best referrals for care in the Seattle area," Christian instructs.

"Of course Mr. Grey," Dr. Humphreys says. "Ms. Steele, when you feel up to it you can begin a bland diet today – your stomach will likely need some time to adjust to food again. By the time you go home tomorrow you should be on a fairly regular diet. I will have the cafeteria send up some soup and tea for you to start with."

"That won't be necessary, I will arrange to have something brought over," Christian interjects and I can't help but roll my eyes at his reaction.

"I would also highly recommend Ms. Steele that you meet with our psychologist before you leave; he can refer you to a local therapist in your area that you should see to discuss everything that happened," Dr. Humphreys.

"I have already compiled a list of Seattle's finest psychotherapists; we will review it together and have an appointment scheduled for shortly after her discharge tomorrow," Christian says.

"Well it seems like you have everything in line for your wife Mr. Grey," Dr. Humphreys replies. "Ms. Steele, if you need anything please don't hesitate to hit the nurse call button on your remote."

"Thank you," I mumble as she leaves.

"How do you feel?" Christian asks as we are once again left alone in the hospital room.

"Tired, a little sore," I admit. "Where are we anyway?"

"A few hours from Seattle, this was the closest hospital…." He says.

"Did you find him? Is he…." I ask hesitantly a few minutes later.

"He's dead…it's over," Christian tightens his grip on my hand as he says the final word. "I'm so glad you and the baby are okay. I don't know what I would have done…. I love you so much."

"I love you too Christian," I whisper just as my eyes close once again.

Flashback

"What do you want?" I scream as he tightens the ropes that hold me tight against a wooden cross.

"To make you and Christian Grey suffer the way that you have both made me suffer," he says.

"What did we ever do to you?" I scream.

"What? Tell me what we did!" I scream again.

Silence is all that answers me; I look around the room I am….it's dark and filthy and it smells. I have no idea where I am, the last thing I remember was coming out of the bathroom at Escala and then waking up when he was tying me to this thing. I tug at the ropes but it's on use, they are tight around my wrists and ankles.

"HELP ME! Someone! HELP ME!" I scream.

"It's no use…there is no one for miles and miles. No one will hear your screams," he says from further away than before.

"Please….what do you want?" I beg.

"You…first starters you will submit to me," he says with full confidence. "Then, I will show Christian just what he lost. I will take the one thing that matters most to him just like he took what mattered most to me. I will then destroy him, piece by piece….first with you, then his company, and then maybe his sweet little sister that he adores."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO," I scream in fear.

"Ana! ANA!" Christian's voice finally pulls me from my nightmare.

"Oh Christian," I sob.

Christian quickly climbs into my bed and lays next to me. I move closer to him; his arms immediately wrap gently around me careful not to touch my back. I feel the bruises when I move, but right now all that matters is being closer to Christian.

"He's really gone?" I ask cautiously.

"Yes baby, he's gone I promise," he assures me.

I lay in Christian's arms and while I feel safe I just can't get the image of the place where he kept me out of my head. I feel like the smell of that place is still on me even though I'm not wearing any of the clothes I was wearing when I was there. I wonder how long it will be until I can take a shower; I desperately need to feel clean again.

"Can't sleep?" Christian asks.

"No," I sigh.

"Do you feel okay? Do you need anything?" he asks.

"I'm fine, just a little sore," I admit.

"I'm so sorry this happened to you baby," Christian whispers tightening his grip on me. "I'm sorry it took us so long to find you, I'm sorry-"

"Hey, it's not your fault," I assure him. "I knew you would come, even when he said you wouldn't pay-"

"I would have paid anything to get you back Ana, you have to know that," he interrupts. "I love you so much; I wouldn't let anything stand in the way of getting to you."

"I do believe you, it was the only thing that kept me going. Even when he said that you told him that I wasn't worth the twenty million he wanted, I knew he was lying," I say.

"First, he only asked for ten million, not twenty," Christian said firmly. "Second, we had the money ready and waiting for his next instructions. He insisted we had to wait until midnight to give him the money but in the meantime we found a lead on property he might have had access to which is where we found you."

"Sir," Taylor quietly interrupts us. "Mr. Steele is on his way from the hotel."

"Thank you Taylor," Christian says quickly getting up from the bed.

"My Dad is here?" I ask surprised.

"Yes, he came yesterday morning and has been sitting with you on and off throughout the day. He had left an hour or so before you woke up to return to the hotel for a shower and bite to eat," Christian explains.

"And your mom was here?" I ask remember the discussion with the doctor earlier.

"Yes, she came as soon as you were brought in," Christian replies. "Kate was going to try to come to visit today but she texted me to let me know that she was caught up with something at work and wouldn't be able to come until tomorrow. Since are you probably being discharged tomorrow I will tell her to come to Escala once you are settled if that's okay."

"Tell her I will call her once I get settled," I say.

With Christian's assistance I slowly make my way to the rest room, using the bathroom and washing up before my dad comes. I can't see much from the small mirror, but I can see bruises on my face and upper back. My wrists are covered in bandages but I'm sure they are covered in marks from the rope he tied me with. Looking down I see my ankles are also bandaged and I cringe at the memory of being tied to that post.

"Ana? Are you okay?" Christian knocks gently on the door.

"Sorry," I quickly open the door and make my way back to the bed.

"Do you need anything?" he asks.

"Oh sweetie, I'm so glad you woke up," my dad says rushing into room and right to my side quickly embracing me.

"I'll be just outside if either of you need me," I hear Christian say quietly.

"Are you okay? Are you in any pain?" Dad asks.

"I'm fine, really," I assure him.

"I was so worried about you and the baby," he sits next to my bed where Christian had sat only moments ago.

"Christian says you've been here since yesterday?" I ask. "What about work?"

"Nonsense, don't you worry about work," he says. "Of course I was going to be here, where else would I be? Your boyfriend immediately booked me a suite in a nearby hotel before I even arrived yesterday."

"They said I should be able to go home tomorrow," I inform him.

"That's wonderful," he says. "You know you can always come and stay with me if you don't want to go back to Christian's-"

"No, Dad…thank you for the offer but I'm going to go back to Christian's apartment," I assure him. "The man who took me is dead and even so I'm sure Christian will tighten security even further after this. Escala is still one of the safest places for me, Dad."

"That boy really loves you Ana," he admits quietly. "He barely left your side since he found you, he hasn't left the hospital since the ambulance brought you here."

"And I love him Daddy. I knew he would find me, that he would come save me. It was the only thing that kept me going," I whisper.

"I know you don't want to talk about it sweetie, but if you ever want to I'm always here for you," my dad kisses me on the cheek.

"I know Daddy, maybe someday but I'm not ready yet," I admit.

My dad and I chat for a while longer, thankfully he understands that I don't want to talk about what happened and changes the subject. He tells me about everything going on at work and a few projects he is planning on starting at his house over the next couple of months. After an or so my dad announces that he needs to get on the road as he needs to drive home. I don't know exactly where we are but my dad said it took him almost four hours to drive here yesterday. Before my dad even shut the door Christian was back in my room and at my side.

"Taylor picked up some soup and freshly baked bread from a nearby restaurant," Christian sets various dishes on the table in front of me and I quickly realize just how quickly I really am.

"Thank you," I adjust the bed so I'm sitting up further and breathe through the discomfort in my back as the gown rubs against the bruises.

"Are you okay?" Christian quickly asks.

"I'm fine," I assure him.

"I'm sure the doctor can give you something for the pain," Christian suggests.

"No, it's okay. Just a little uncomfortable when the fabric rubs against my back, it's fine," I assure him.

"If it gets too bad…" Christian mumbles.

"So I'm you're wife?" I ask a few minutes later remembering the conversation with the doctor earlier.

"It was the only way they would let me stay with you," Christian laughs. "My mom was shocked to say the least when I said that I told the hospital I was your husband."

"I'm sure she was," I giggle.

"Taylor needs to talk to you at some point soon," Christian sighs. "I know you probably don't want to talk about it, but we need your help. We are trying to find a link between Adam and me; he said he was going to make me pay for what I did to him but we haven't been able to figure out what he is talking about. We're hoping maybe he might have said something to you that might explain it."

"He did, it wasn't just what you did to him – it was what we did to him," I shudder at the memory of his words.