Chpt. 20: Christian's POV
"HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM" I hear.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO….Please!" I hear Ana softly moan next to me.
I turn on the light next to the bed and find she is in the middle of a nightmare again. I try calling her name but like last time it has no effect. I try shaking her arms, still nothing. I try pulling her against me to hold her since it worked last time but she is pushing me away forcefully.
"Don't touch me! Please not the belt!" She yells loudly.
"ANA!" I call to her.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" She yells. "One….two….please stop!"
I'm in agony sitting here listening to her right now. After hearing what happened to her I'm sure the nightmare she is having is her actually reliving the abuse that the lousy piece of shit excuse for a man did to her. Her counting is new though…she never told me that he made her count as he beat her. My stomach sinks as I realize this is what I made my subs do when I was punishing them. I never realized how sick and twisted the lifestyle was until I heard Ana's story. I try to remind myself that each sub was a consenting adult who could safe word at any time to end the punishment but this does little to settle my stomach as Ana again screams.
Ana is thrashing around on the bed kicking and throwing her hands around clearly acting as if she is pushing someone away from her. I am lost, I don't know what to do or how to wake her. I can't let her continue reliving the abuse; it's probably my fault she is having a nightmare. If she didn't tell me her story the other day perhaps she wouldn't be having a nightmare.
"SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!" She yells and sits straight up in bed now awake.
"Are you okay?" I ask her gently.
She looks around the room as if she is trying to figure out where she is before her eyes settle on me. She is breathing heavily and is covered in sweat; her eyes are still full of fear. She doesn't say a word as her breathing begins to calm down. I gently get up from the bed, go in the bathroom and begin to fill up the bathtub adding a few drops of lavender oil. I return to the bedroom where Ana remains on the bed having not moved since I went into the bathroom. I slowly walk over to her and pick her up from the bed; she leans into me somewhat but does not make eye contact. I gently sit her on the step that leads up to the bathtub and take off my t shirt that she slept in along with her underwear. Seeing that she is still not moving I realize if I'm going to get her in the tub I likely have to join her and put her in myself. I quickly take off my clothes, climb into the tub and gently lift her into the tub placing her on my lap. She puts her head on my chest but doesn't say anything. Her breathing is slowly returning to normal as I gently wash her with a cloth.
"Thank you," she whispers into my ear.
"You don't need to thank me Ana," I kiss her gently on her forehead.
We sit in the tub in silence for a long time as I continue to rub circles around her back.
"I'm sorry," I say.
"What are you sorry for?" she pulls away from me so she can look at me.
"It's my fault," I say quietly.
"What is?" she is confused now.
"The nightmare…" I answer. "If you hadn't told me what happened, you probably wouldn't have had it."
"Christian," she pulls my face up so I am looking at her. "Honestly, I'm surprised you haven't seen one of my nightmares before now. I usually have one at least weekly although there are times when they happen much more often. After Christmas…they were every night. But even before then it would be miracle if I slept more than five or six hours a night. It is not your fault and probably has nothing to do with what I told you."
"Are you sure?" I ask shyly.
"I'm sure," she kisses me passionately on the lips.
"How about we try to go back to sleep?" I say as we both get out of the tub.
"Sounds good," she says as we climb back into bed.
I pull her close to me and she quickly falls asleep; I'm sure the nightmare exhausted her. I on the other hand cannot fall asleep; my mind is racing. After an hour of trying to fall asleep and failing, I decide to go to my office and get some work done. I respond to a few emails and then quickly realize that today is New Year's Eve. Usually I would spend today working as if it were any other day, but now that I'm with Ana I want to make today special for her. I set out to start planning a perfect day to her while she is upstairs tucked into my bed. This is such a novel feeling; having Ana upstairs in my bed just feels so right.
Ana's POV:
I roll over only to find the other side of the bed empty and cold. Christian must not have slept much last night I think as I get out bed. Realizing I'm only in my underwear, I quickly grab a t shirt out of Christian's drawer and make my way downstairs to find him. I check the kitchen and the great room but don't find him. I haven't had a tour of the apartment yet so I'm not sure where else he might be. I decide to make a cup of tea, hoping that Christian will hear me and find me since I have no idea where he is in this large apartment.
"Good Morning Ana" Gail says coming out of what I presume is her apartment.
"Morning Gail," I smile.
"Are you and Mr. Grey ready for breakfast?" she starts making a pot of coffee for Christian.
"Ummmm….I'm not sure. I don't know where Christian is," I admit.
"Oh," she says surprised. "Have you checked his office?"
"No…I didn't want to bother him if he was working," I say.
"Nonsense, I'm sure he would welcome the interruption," she says shooing me out of the kitchen.
"Christian?" I ask knocking on his door.
"Come in," Christian says opening the door. "I didn't hear you wake up I'm sorry."
"That's okay, I didn't want to bother you if you were working," I say kissing him.
"I wasn't working but planning our day," he smiles.
"Oh?" I ask.
"Yes we have several things planned so we need to get breakfast taken care of," he says with a suspicious smile on his face.
We return to the kitchen where Gail has set out a bowl of fresh fruit while she finishes the eggs. We quickly eat breakfast as I try to convince Christian to tell me what is planned for today. He won't give me a hint except to tell me to wear jeans, a long sleeve shirt and a comfortable pair of sneakers. That doesn't give much away since it's cold outside it's not like I'm going to wear a pair of shorts!
"Skip the shower, we don't have time," he says finishing the breakfast.
"Yes sir," I smile and go upstairs to find something to wear from my overnight bag.
Getting dressed I realize this is my last clean pair of clothes so hopefully Christian doesn't have anything else planned today that I will need to wear different clothes for. When we get back from wherever we are going I will ask Christian if I can throw in a load of laundry so I at least have clothes to wear home tomorrow. I quickly remember I have to work tomorrow afternoon realizing I will need to be home fairly early so I can change into my uniform.
"Are you ready yet Ana?" Christian asks walking into the room.
"All done," I walk out of the bathroom.
"Taylor!" Christian yells as we walk down the steps.
"Yes sir?" Taylor asks appearing at the bottom of the steps.
"Is everything ready?" Christian asks.
"Yes sir," Taylor answers not giving anything away.
"Let's go," Christian says grabbing my hand and walking me to the elevator.
We take Christian's Audi SUV again and Taylors starts driving. After driving for some time I realize we have left the city and are heading to a more rural area somewhere outside of Seattle. I have not explored Seattle very much and certainly not any other parts of Washington since I moved here. Another hour passes before Christian puts a blindfold over my eyes and hushes me when I begin to protest. I can't see anything, but I feel the car pulling onto a very bumpy road. Christian reaches over and pulls me closer to him as we get jostled around in the car.
"We're here!" Christian says happily as he helps me out of the car.
"Where?" I ask still blindfolded.
Christian pulls the blindfold off and as my eyes adjust to the bright sunlight I see that we are at what seems to be a small airport of some type. Off to the side is a very large building with a picture of two people skydiving.
"Oh My God!" I exclaim. "Are we going sky diving?"
"Yes," Christian says kissing me. "Is that okay?"
"Of course! I've always wanted to try this!" I exclaim hugging him tightly.
"Ana, I would like you to meet Michael, this is his place. Michael this is my girlfriend Ana," Christian introduces as I blush deeply. I don't believe he has ever called me his girlfriend directly, although he never corrected anyone when they called me his girlfriend either.
"It's nice to meet you Ana," Michael shakes my hand.
Michael shows us a video which explains various safety rules and demonstrates proper landing techniques so that you are not injured when you finally hit the ground. Michael gives us each a jumpsuit to put over our clothes before we head out to the plane. Christian has explained that he will jump solo as he has done hundreds of jumps but that I will be tethered to Michael essentially just enjoying the fall. Michael shows me how the parachute works and explains that he will signal me when it is time to release it. If for some reason I am unable to release it he has two releases on his suit.
"Are you ready?" Christian squeezes my hand as we walk out to the plane.
"Yes! I am so excited!" I exclaim happily.
We are seated in a small plane where we are strapped before the plane begins to take off. Michael explains that when we reach a certain altitude he will strap my suit to his suit before opening the door. Michael and Christian already have parachutes strapped to them. Surprisingly I am not nervous; I thought perhaps once we got in the air I would be but I'm more excited than anything else. Christian keeps looking over at me smiling; I am very thankful that he is sharing this with me.
"Are you ready Ana?" Michael says loudly to me.
"Yes!" I exclaim.
I release my seat belt and stand up holding onto the ropes above my head so I don't get thrown around as Michael warned could happen while in the air. Michael steps behind me and straps me to him securely. He shows me the parachute release on my suit and explains that he will tap my shoulder when I should pull it. Josh, his business partner who assisting us today opens the door and suddenly it becomes very loud. I had momentarily forgotten that this was in the video and was surprised that I could not hear anything. Christian steps up to the door first, waves to me and then jumps. A minute or two later Michael taps me on the shoulder and points the door indicating it is our turn. We approach the door and I can barely see Christian's parachute in the far distance. Michael taps my shoulder again and we jump out of the plane mimicking the technique showed in the video. I put my arms out and feel free as we completely fall into midair. Michael taps my shoulder and I pull the parachute release which immediately must release because suddenly I am jolted upwards. We are moving quickly now, not just down but back and forth as the wind takes us wherever it wants. Looking down the ground is getting closer and I find myself disappointed that it is over so quickly but I can't wait to tell Kate about the jump! We land perfectly, getting bounced around minimally and eventually come to a complete stop before Michael unhooks me from his suit.
"Well?" Christian asks nervously.
"That was amazing!" I exclaim jumping up to hug him again. "That was so much fun!"
"I'm so glad you enjoyed it!" he says leaning in to me. "One of these times I wouldn't mind having you strapped to me when we jump."
I don't say anything but feel my cheeks blush what I am sure is a deep red.
"Come, let's go we still have a few things planned today" Christian grabs my hand and we walk back to the car where Taylor is waiting.
Taylor drives us to a small diner where we have lunch before heading back to Seattle. Christian explains that Taylor was able to capture a few pictures of us jumping from the plane that we will be able to see on Christian's computer later today.
"Thank you again Christian…today was amazing!" I say getting into the car to head back to Christian's apartment.
"You're welcome, but today is not over yet," Christian says smiling.
"Oh?" I ask.
"I thought we would go back to my club tonight to ring in the new year, if that is okay?" he says.
"Your club?" I'm say confused.
"Picturesque is my club," he explains.
"Oh, I didn't know you owned the club," I say shocked.
"I bought it a few years ago and turned it around making it more of an upscale establishment. I am more of a silent owner; I'm not there on a day to day basis since I have a strong manager running the club. Anyway, tonight they are having a huge New Year's Eve party that I thought might be fun to check out," Christian explains.
"That sounds great…but…."I say.
"If you don't want to go we can do something else," Christian interrupts quickly. "Whatever you want to do tonight."
"No I would love to go! I just didn't bring anything to wear to a club; can we stop at my apartment?" I ask.
"Don't be mad, but it's all taken care of," he says.
"Huh? What is?" I ask confused.
"I had some clothes delivered to the apartment while we were gone so you would have something to wear," he explains.
"What? You had someone go through my drawers, seeing my underwear!" I am pissed now; this is a clear invasion of privacy!
"No! Of course not!" he kisses me on the cheek quickly. "I had my personal shopper send some clothes over so you will have a few choices of something to wear tonight and then a couple items to keep at the apartment when you stay over."
"Christian," I sigh. "I told you before I didn't need you to do that, I can easily just stop by my apartment and grab clothes."
"Yes, but I wanted to do this. It's only a few items, don't be mad…" he leans over kissing my neck up and down slowly.
"That's not fair," I moan as he continues lightly kissing my neck.
"Yes it is, then you can't stay mad," he says before kissing me passionately on the lips.
"Sir, Ma'am," Taylor says gently interrupting us before we get too inappropriate.
We get out of the car and take the elevator to Christian's apartment where Taylor quickly disappears. I am surprised at how easily I am turned on by Christian and find myself wanting to touch him after just the brief kiss in the car. I wonder if it's like this for everyone? It's as if being intimate with him makes me feel so much closer to him. I think it's because it is something I haven't done with anyone else but the way Christian is with me I think he feels the same way.
"Join me in the shower?" I ask.
"Oh I would love to," he says kissing me deeply on the lips. "But I have to get a few things done before we leave for dinner. Gail should have hung your clothes in my closet; why don't you pick something out to wear to the club tonight?"
"Okay," I walk upstairs and into Christian's room disappointed that he didn't join me but I have to remember that he runs a very large company that takes up a lot of time. He has pretty much spent every day with me lately so I'm sure his work is beginning to suffer.
I walk into the closet and found exactly what I thought I would find; definitely more than a couple items of clothing. There are several cocktail dresses, some skirts, a few shirts, jeans and several different pairs of shoes. I sigh knowing that I cannot win this argument with him; I really did not need all these clothes over here but I have to admit it will be nice not to have to pack a bag every time I come over. I open a drawer and find several different sets of matching underwear and bra; I blush thinking someone picked out these items for me. At least I know Taylor hasn't seen them since he was with us all day.
I spend a few extra minutes in the shower enjoying the hot water as it cascades over my body. I throw on a towel before returning to the closet to pick out an outfit for tonight. I chose a dark blue dress that sits off the shoulders and comes to my knees but has a small slit in the side up to my mid-thigh. I pick out a strapless white lace bra that is practically see through and a matching thong. I have never owned nice underwear or bras; really it's been whatever is on sale at Walmart or Target. However putting these items on makes me never want to take them off. I put the dress on and find that it hugs my curves perfectly while showing off just enough cleavage.
"Wow," I hear Christian say behind me.
"You like?" I ask shyly turning around so he can take in the full dress.
"You look hot!" He exclaims grabbing me by my waist, pushing me up against the closet door before kissing me passionately.
"You are going to have every guy checking you out tonight in that dress," he says pulling away from my lips.
"Doubtful," I blush. "But my eyes will only be on you."
"I'm going to take a shower and get ready because if I stay here much longer we will never leave," He says stepping out of the closet.
"I wouldn't mind," I smile as he walks away groaning.
I blow dry my hair before putting it half up and curling the ends. I'm not very good with my hair; Kate usually sees that it looks good before we go out but this will have to do. Apply a very light coat of make up just as Christian steps out of the bathroom. He is dressed in a pair of soft dress pants and a button down shirt looking as sexy as ever. He could probably be wearing a pair of sweatpants and a t shirt and still look gorgeous, I think to myself.
"Ready?" Christian asks taking my hand as I finish putting on a pair of black heels.
"Yes," I answer.
Taylor drives us the short distance to the club where once again the line goes all the way down the block and seems to go around the corner. Christian takes my hand as I climb out of the car and walks with confidence up to the bouncers where we are immediately ushered inside and to the VIP area. As much as I hate to admit it, seeing how the other half live has been nice. It is motivating me even more to want to succeed and one day to be able to not have to worry about how I am going to afford rent or groceries.
We are seated at a reserved table once again overlooking the dance floor below. The waitress brings over a bottle of wine that Christian must have ordered before we arrive and says that our meals will be brought out shortly. I just smile at Christian and the lengths he went through today to make sure everything was perfect. New Year's eve has never really been a big deal for me; until I met Kate I never bothered with the holiday. The last couple of years Kate would drag me to various clubs on New Year's Eve to watch the ball drop but I never really enjoyed going there, I just went to get her to stop bugging me about spending the night alone. Tonight is different and I find myself truly enjoying spending the last day of the year with Christian.
"Your meals," the waitress says placing two plates of filet mignon and lobster tails in front of us.
"That will be all," Christian dismisses the waitress.
"Wow, this looks delicious," I say.
"It better be," Christian smiles. "If you want something else just let me know and I will have the chef cook whatever you want."
"Don't be silly Christian, this is fine," I say taking a bite of the vegetables.
Christian and I eat our dinner, drinking our wine and making small talk. He tells me more about his business and some current projects he is working on and I tell him some of my plans to review with Antonio tomorrow for the Valentine's Day service. The conversation flows easily and there is never an uncomfortable silence between us. The night passes by fairly quickly as we continue to eat the various finger food snacks that served by wait staff and listen to the music of a live band that is playing downstairs. I sip on the wine slowly not wanting to have too much to drink tonight.
"Dance with me?" Christian puts out his hand as he stands.
Christian guides me to the dance floor balcony and begins dancing behind me just like the last time we were here. His hands follow the curves of my body as I rest my head back on his shoulder letting myself go with the music. He reaches down and kisses me passionately as he grinds his erection into my backside. His hands continue to move all over my body as he wiggles me against him further which I find ignites the desire in me again. I quickly turn to face him, wrapping my hands around his neck pulling him closer to me kissing him deeply again. I vaguely here people counting down to midnight in the background but my focus is on Christian and it seems his focus is on me as well. Christian grabs my ass and pulls me closer to him where I can easily feel how much he wants me through both of our clothing.
"I have never spent New Year's Eve with anyone; I am so glad I have you to spend it with," Christian says into my ear.
"I wouldn't want to spend it with anyone else," I say sucking on his ear lobe.
"I am falling so hard for you," Christian whispers into my ear as he wraps his arms around me waist and kisses me passionately.
"Take me home," I take a deep breath before saying, "Make love to me."