Chpt. 41 APOV:
"We have received an email about Ana's journal" Taylor announces.
"What type of an email? Who sent it? Can you trace it? What do they want? What are they threatening?" Christian asks angrily.
"Right now they are just telling us that they have it and will be in touch at a later time to discuss the return of it" Taylor explains calmly.
"Have Barney trace the email" Christian directs.
"He is trying sir" Taylor pauses. "The sender is using some kind of a deterrent which is bouncing the IP address all over the world. He is trying to hack into the system but is not having much luck."
"So we just wait again?" I ask.
"Yes, we wait for them to contact us again" Taylor says.
"When did they send this email?" Christian asks.
"It was received around three this morning" Taylor answers.
"If Barney can't track the IP address then we wait for them to make their move. They will likely try to blackmail me for a large amount of money or threaten to go to the media. At that point we will call their bluff" Christian says a few minutes later.
"Did they sign a name to the email?" I ask.
"No" Taylor answers.
"I want all the security codes changed here and at GEH as an extra precaution" Christian directs.
"All the codes were changed at six this morning sir, it is protocol whenever a threat is received" Taylor replies.
"Very good" Christian sighs.
"Did the email indicate when they would be in touch?" I ask.
"No, but I'm going to guess it will be a few days before we hear from them again" Taylor answers.
"Why?" I ask.
"They want to keep you on edge, to make you nervous…it's what they get from doing this" Taylor explains.
"What do you suggest?" Christian asks.
"Go about your lives as if nothing is going on. Be seen in public, even if it's just at a store or dinner-" Taylor begins.
"Doesn't that put us at risk?" I interrupt.
"No, I think they want money right now or to ruin you and Christian. If the same person is responsible for this as was responsible for the accident than they have realized that physically hurting you isn't going to tear you apart. What's left is public humiliation" Taylor explains.
"What do you think baby?" Christian asks.
"If Taylor thinks it is safe than I trust him" I say with confidence; I've really come to trust Taylor especially since the accident.
"Then we will plan something for later today" Christian agrees.
"Thank you Taylor" I say as he leaves the room.
"Will the drama ever end?" he runs his hands through his hair in frustration.
"Hopefully as soon as we catch whoever is doing this" I say.
"We both know who it is" he replies quietly but the guilt in his voice is apparent.
"Christian…don't even go there" I pull his face towards me kissing him. "This is not your fault even if we discover Elena is behind this."
"If she read it…your private thoughts…." He mumbles.
"Christian…it's a journal of horrible memories that I probably should have destroyed when I stopped writing in it a year ago. As much as I don't like the idea of someone else reading it, at the very least someone I don't trust, those memories don't define me. I'm a much a stronger person for having survived it and I would hope that anyone who reads that can see it" I say strongly.
"God you're the strongest person I know" He kisses me deeply.
"Speaking of…" I take a deep breath.
"What is it?" he asks.
"Now that we've been pictured in the media, it's probably only a matter of time until the media starts digging into my past-" I begin.
"There's nothing about what happened to you anywhere, I can assure you of that" he interrupts.
"I know" I sigh. "But I'm assuming there is a record of my past addresses right?"
"Yes" Christian admits.
"It won't take long for the media to figure out some of the addresses were to that of boarding homes" I say sadly.
"Ana, if that happens we will tackle it. So you had to stay at a boarding home while you put yourself through college. I think it shows what great lengths you were willing to go through to pursue your education" he smiles.
"I would like to tell Kate and maybe your family so they don't learn about it from the media" I say. "I'd rather them hear it from me then read about it in a paper."
"If that's what you want, but you don't have to" he replies.
"If I don't they will just look at me and wonder" I say.
"Let's take one step at a time, but if you still want to we can have dinner at my parents' house one night and tell everyone. Mom loves to have family dinners so it will give her an excuse to have everyone over. Oh, and we can look at the yard while we're there so we can plan where the ceremony will be" Christian smiles.
"Speaking of, I want to get bridal magazines like you suggested last night but I don't think it's wise for me to go buy them since the media has pictures of us together" I say.
"Taylor!" Christian calls.
"Yes sir?" Taylor appears moments later.
"Ana would like some wedding planning or bridal magazines. Can you arrange to pick some up? I don't want them delivered here" he requests.
"Of course sir" Taylor says. "I will have them here this afternoon."
"The poor guy is going to be so embarrassed" I blush.
"He'll be fine, he's picked up worse for me" Christian laughs.
"Worse?" I ask.
"I've had him pick up condoms, lubricant, toys, lingerie, you name it" he admits.
"Oh…for your…" I stutter.
"My submissives…yes" he says disappointed.
"Toys?" I ask quietly.
"Not regularly; usually I had those delivered but if I needed something…" Christian explains.
"What kind of toys?" My face blushes as I can barely whisper the words.
"Why, Ms. Steele are you getting curious?" Christian smirks.
"Maybe" I admit.
"Hmmmmm…you have no idea the images going through my head right now" Christian smiles. "I'd love to find out what sort of toys you might like one day Ana."
"Tell me Taylor hasn't bought panties for me?" I ask, needing to change the subject quickly.
"Ummmmm" he doesn't answer.
"Oh my! Christian!" I exclaim embarrassed.
"Well, he didn't pick them out; he just picked them up from the store" Christian laughs.
"I don't want to hear anymore. I'm better if I don't think of Taylor seeing my panties" I blush.
"You know Gail has washed them right?" he smiles, clearly enjoying my discomfort.
"I know" I sigh. "But at least she is a woman!"
"So, Taylor says we should be seen out…what do you feel like doing this weekend?" he asks a few minutes later as we sit in the great room on the couch.
"I don't know" I say.
"We could go shopping?" he suggests.
"I don't need anything" I reply.
"You need a reason to shop?" He asks surprised.
"I'm not in the habit of spending money just to spend money Christian" I lecture.
"I know you're not…it's just the opposite of most women" he smiles.
"I suppose you're right" I say.
"Have you ever been to the Space Needle?" Christian asks.
"No…but I've always wanted to" I say happily.
"Let's do that tomorrow, we can have dinner there as well" he suggests.
"Oh that's sounds perfect!" I smile.
"Sir, ma'am" Taylor enters the great room.
"Hi Taylor" I greet him.
"Here are the magazines you requested Ana" Taylor hands me a stack.
"I'm sorry you had to go buy them. I hope it wasn't too embarrassing" I laugh.
"Not for me" he smiles. "Sawyer is the one who purchased them."
"Poor Sawyer!" we both laugh.
"Mr. Grey here is the other item you requested" Taylor hands Christian a small gift bag.
"Thank you Taylor" he says.
Christian turns to me, handing me the gift bag.
"What's this?" I ask surprised.
"Open it" he says.
I open the bag to find a small jewelry box; opening that I find a simple gold necklace. I look at Christian confused, it's a lovely necklace but I'm not sure what the reason he is giving it to me is.
"For your engagement ring when we go out, so you can keep it close to you" he explains. "Like you suggested last night."
"Oh, that's right. Thank you" I gush.
"I hope you won't have to use it too much before the announcement is made in a few weeks" Christian admits.
"It's only a few weeks" I kiss him. "We have graduation in a couple weeks and then the gala where we will make our announcement."
The next morning I awake extra early, excited at the thought of going to the Space Needle for the first time. When I was looking at colleges it was the one thing about Seattle that caught my attention, the one site I swore I would see if I ever made it to this city. Unfortunately tickets aren't cheap and since I've been struggling financially since I arrived here I never had the opportunity.
"There you are" Christian joins me in the kitchen as I'm preparing breakfast. "I woke up and you were gone."
"I couldn't sleep" I smiled.
"You're really this excited about going to the Space Needle?" Christian asks surprised.
"Are you kidding? I've only seen pictures but the views look amazing! Here, look at the pictures I found online" I show him several pictures on my iphone.
"I know baby, I've been there" he laughs.
"Oh…are you sure you want to go again?" I ask disappointed.
"I'm looking forward to seeing it for the first time with you" he assures me. "You always make me see things differently."
We eat breakfast, shower and get dressed before deciding to head out. My engagement ring is hanging from my neck on the chain that Christian gave me yesterday just in case we are photographed while we're out. Both Taylor and Sawyer are with us today, which is reassuring given that we still don't know if Elena is behind the break in at Kate's apartment. We stop at a mall to do some shopping, I'm not really sure for what but Christian insists that we should shop. I think it's just another opportunity for us to be seen but I don't complain.
"Can we stop here?" I ask as we pass a bookstore.
"Of course, anywhere you want" he smiles leading me into the book store.
We spend the next hour roaming the bookstore; I could have spent the entire day in here if it wasn't for our plans to see the Space Needle later. Christian holds several books that I have picked out, laughing as I hand him another one. He reminds me that we have an entire library at home but I point out that he doesn't have these books. I grab a few cookbooks as well, I enjoy trying to cook new things which is something Gail and I have in common.
"Oh my….you're…." the sales girl gushes staring at Christian.
"Christian Grey, it's nice to meet you" he says.
"I….it's nice to meet you to" she quickly recovers. "I saw your picture with her in the magazine…it's here somewhere."
"That's okay we've seen it" I speak up as she has been ignoring me.
"I can't believe you're here" she blushes.
"Would you mind ringing us up please" I request as she stares openly at Christian.
"Yes of course" she says but her eyes still don't leave Christian, she makes no effort to ring up my books.
"Excuse me….if you're done staring at my boyfriend, I would like to check out" I say sternly.
She doesn't say anything but quickly rings my books up before telling me the total. I search my wallet but cannot find my bank card, instead I find a black American Express card I've never seen before with my name on it. I glare at Christian who just smiles next to me, as I'm left with no choice but to hand over this card. I know I had my bank card when we were in Aspen because I used it to pay for the snow globe but I can't recall having it any time after that.
"Did you take my bank card?" I ask as we leave the book store and out of earshot of the salesgirl.
"Yes" he admits.
"Why?" I ask.
"Because you don't need it" he says simply.
"Christian, that's the only access I have to my money besides writing checks" I point out.
"We're going to be married which means what's mine is yours" he kisses me deeply in the middle of the mall.
"I don't feel right spending your money" I say.
"Baby, you need to get used to it" he smiles. "It's our money. Everything I own, every dime I make is ours."
"But you earned this money" I sigh. "We're not even married yet."
"We're not…but in a few months we will be" he squeezes my hand tightly.
"I'm not going to win this argument am I?" I ask defeated.
"No" he smirks.
"Fine….but I still don't like it" I say knowing there is no point in arguing with this man.
"Come, let's go see the Space Needle" he laughs.
Taylor drives us to the Space Needle which is so much larger than I ever imagined. Christian purchases tickets and arranges for just two of us to ride in the elevator alone with Taylor and Sawyer following behind us. The ride in the elevator, which has windows on each side plus windows on the doors, is just amazing. The view going up is breathtaking, you can see every section of the city here….from the large buildings to the water to the bridges to the mountains in the distance. From the pictures online and in magazines that I have seen I knew the elevators took you up high but I had no idea how high up we would be until we finally reached the top. You can barely see the cars on the street, which now look like ants from this height. The view is truly breathtaking; I am in awe that I'm standing here with the man that I love, the man that I'm going to spend the rest of my life with.
"If you look right there, that building is GEH" Christian points out.
"Wow, it looks so small from here" I say.
"That is Pike Market Place which is within walking distance of Escala" Christian shares.
"What is it?" I ask.
"You should go with Gail sometime….she loves going there. They have all fresh food, fresh seafood literally caught that morning and specialty crafts. They put on a show most of the time, throwing fish between the stands" he laughs.
"I'll have to go with her next time" I smile. "This view is truly amazing."
"I'll have to take you in Charlie Tango to see Seattle at night; in some ways that view is better than this" he says.
"Charlie Tango?" I ask.
"My helicopter" he answers.
"You have a helicopter?" I gasp.
"Yes, I've been flying for several years now" he explains.
"Is there anything you don't have?" I ask.
"You as my wife" he pulls me against him, kissing me deeply as the elevator comes to a stop.
"You will in a few months" I smile.
"We're here" he announces as we step off the elevator where Taylor and Sawyer greet us.
"Welcome to Skycity Restaurant" the hostess greets us.
"Grey, I have a reservation" Christian says.
"Oh Christian" I gush looking around.
The restaurant has windows on all sides, giving you a panoramic view of the city. As I glance at the menu, my jaw nearly drops seeing the prices of the dishes. I can make an entire meal for the two of us for the price of the starters alone. Christian obviously doesn't notice or doesn't care about the price as he casually asks me what I'm going to order. I'm too taken back to decide, so he orders the New York Strip steak platter for both of us. He continues to point out various attractions from the windows as we eat our dinner, which is probably by far the best steak I have ever eaten.
"Christian, thank you for a wonderful evening. This truly exceeded my expectations…the pictures didn't do it justice" I say as we drive back to Escala.
"Anything for you Ana" he holds me close to him as I close my eyes and fall asleep against his chest.
I wake the next morning to Christian's alarm clock going off; I can't believe I slept all night after falling asleep in the car. Christian must have changed me at some point because I'm only in a bra and panties. I don't remember anything after closing my eyes in the car, the exhaustion from the entire day finally hitting me as soon as Taylor started driving.
"Good Morning" Christian smiles, kissing me deeply.
"Hmmmmmmmm morning" I say.
"Did you take off my clothes last night?" I ask.
"I did…you don't know how tempting it was to wake you up" he smirks.
"Oh really…and what would you have done if I woke up last night?" I ask seductively.
"Well, I would have started with this" his fingers stroke my sex through my panties.
"And then?" I ask breathless.
"I would have done this" his other hand finds my nipple.
"And I would have done this" I grasp his erection through his underwear.
"I would have done this" he moves my panties aside, rubbing my clit.
"Hmmmmmmm" I moan.
"Then I would tell you to take your wet panties off" he moans as I squeeze him.
"And I would do this" I gently slide my silk panties down my legs, purposely grinding myself against him in the process.
"Then this" I moan pushing his pants down as his finger slides through my wet folds.
"Time for this to come off" he quickly on hooks my bra, pushing it aside so my breasts are against his chest.
"Ohhhhhhhhhh" he pinches my nipple just as he slides a finger into me.
"I love how wet you are for me…how tight you are…" he moans against me, pushing his erection against my hand.
"Christian…." I beg.
"I've got you, I will always take care of you" he rolls us over so I'm on top of him.
"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh" I moan as he slides into me, stretching me as my body tries to accommodate him.
"You feel so good" he nips at my ear as he slowly moves me against him.
As my body relaxes and adjusts to him, I lift myself up slightly from him moving my hips against him. In this position, I can control the pace and the depth and it leaves his hands free to roam my body. His hands explore my body freely, the fear of touching my back long gone – something that's not even a thought in my head with Christian any longer. His touch is comforting and protecting; I don't hesitate or even pause when his hands stay firm on my back guiding me to a pace that brings him pleasure.
"Oh God!" I scream as his mouth latches onto my nipple hard.
"Come baby" he says before pulling my nipple gently with his teeth.
"AHHHHHHHHH!" I moan loudly as I find my release.
Christian quickly pulls out of me, leaving me feeling empty and wanting more, before flipping me over onto my stomach. His arm gently wraps around my stomach as he lifts me up, his fingers tease my nipples as his erection probes my sex. My hips push back against him as if they have a mind of their own; desire and want is coursing through my veins despite the orgasm minutes ago.
"Christian….please" I beg as gently rubs my clit.
"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh" I moan as he slams into me.
Christian wraps his arms around me, holding me close to him as he moves in and out of me staying deep inside of me as the need arises. Whereas before his hands roamed my back, they now explore my breasts, stomach and sex. The combination of his gentle touch over my body and him moving in and out of me is too much; I quickly find myself on the edge. Christian's breath hitches, his grip tightens on me and I can tell that he is close to his own release.
"CHRISTIAN!" I scream out as the orgasm rips through me moments later.
"Oh Baby….that's it….you feel so good….BABY!" Christian screams as I feel the familiar warmth move throughout me.
Christian holds me tight against him as he rolls us onto our sides, our connection remaining intact the entire time. I will never get used to the intensity of our love making; the intense need we both seem to have during this time; the outpouring of emotions that are felt when we're joined like this is amazing to me. I can't imagine that sex is like this for everyone; if it were why would people ever leave the bedroom?
"I love you" I grip Christian's arms which are wrapped around me.
"I love you with all my heart" Christian whispers. "I can't wait to spend the rest of our lives together."
"I could happily spend the rest of my life right here" I smile.