Chpt. 47 APOV:
"Ladies and Gentleman, may I introduce for the first time Mr. and Mrs. Christian Grey!" the wedding officiant announces.
We walk the short distance to our guests, each of them embracing and congratulating us. Christian's hands never leave me; his hand grasps mine tightly even as our guests compete for our attention. With a slight nod to the wedding coordinator, our guests are ushered to a small room off the balcony for cocktails while we get ready to have our pictures taken. As needed some of our guests will be pulled out for additional pictures and eventually we will have a large group photo with everyone. I ask the coordinator for a few minutes before the pictures start, seeing as I need to speak to Christian.
"I love you so much Ana," Christians holds me tight against him, whispering in my ear.
"Remember how much you love me and how much I love you…don't get mad," I take a deep breath.
"I couldn't possibly get mad at you on our wedding day…what is it?" Christian pulls back slightly so he can look me in the eye.
"Your dad is here," I whisper and gesture to the corner of the balcony where Carrick has finally stepped out of the shadows.
"What?!" Christian exclaims loudly. "Ana….I…..Fuck!"
"Christian…baby…."I hold his face firmly, forcing him to look at me. "As much as what your dad said hurt me and I know hurt you, there was no way I was going to let him miss your wedding day. You have no idea what I would give to have my father here with us today, to witness his daughter getting married. I could not take that from you or from your dad."
"Christian…Ana…Congratulations," Carrick joins us after a few moments. "I am truly happy for the both of you."
"Sure," Christian mumbles.
"Son, I deeply regret the things I said to you and Ana both that night. I know that neither of you have forgotten or forgiven me for my awful behavior. I was completely out of line; I was thinking as a lawyer and not as father. I should have trusted not only you but Ana as well; she has never given any of us any reason to suspect that she had ulterior motivates. I will spend the rest of my life trying to earn forgiveness from you both. I am deeply sorry for my behavior and for my words," Carrick says.
"How did you find out about the wedding?" Christian asks.
"Your beautiful new wife here," Carrick smiles kindly at me, "emailed me a couple of days ago inviting me. Ana, I know I said it to you in email and I will say it again now, you are a much bigger person than I am…I don't know that if I were your shoes that I would have extended the olive branch. I will forever be grateful to you for allowing me to be here today. Christian, if you don't want me here…say the word and I will return to my room but I would very much like to stay and help you celebrate your big day."
"Well…since you're here already you might as well stay," Christian grumbles. "You can join the others for cocktails while we get our pictures taken."
"Of course, thank you both," Carrick kisses me on the cheek and shakes Christian's hand before walking away.
"Are you mad?" I pull him closer to me, hugging him tightly as the tension slowly leaves his body.
"Mad? Surprised, shocked…but I don't think mad is the right word," Christian sighs. "I'm still mad as hell at him and honestly am surprised that you could just forget what he said so quickly-"
"Christian, make no mistake – I did not forget what he said and what he accused me of doing that night," I interrupt. "But, family is family….he needed to be here. I didn't want you to look back on the happiest day of our lives and regret him not being here."
"God, I love you so much Ana," Christian kisses me deeply just as our wedding coordinator clears her throat to remind of us of the photographer who is waiting for us.
What feels like hours later, our pictures are finally complete. We took individual pictures, pictures as a couple and pictures with each of our guests before a large group picture is taken with the fountain in the background. I finally meet Roz and her wife Gwen as well as Christian's psychologist, Dr. Flynn who Christian has been seeing for several years now. It was nice to finally put names with faces especially knowing how important both Roz and Dr. Flynn are to Christian. The reception flies by quickly, since the wedding is small we are able to spend time with all of our guests without feeling like we missed someone. The food, music and décor are much like everything else tonight-perfect. Andrea did an absolutely amazing job coordinating with the Bellagio to keep the ceremony simple but elegant. After spending time with our guests and eating dinner, we spend some time on the dance floor before deciding to retire for the night. It's no surprise that Elliot, Kate and Mia all decide to hit the Lily Bar and Lounge at the Bellagio rather than returning to the villa with everyone else. Everyone had their own opinion about Carrick being there: Elliot and Grace were both very thankful, Kate thought I was crazy for inviting him and should have let him miss everything, Gail didn't say so but I could tell by the look in her eyes she approved but most of all I know Christian was glad his father was here even if he wasn't ready to admit it yet.
"I want to thank all of you for joining us in celebrating our marriage today. Ana and I are truly blessed to have such wonderful friends and family," Christian says as we prepare to leave the reception and head back to our villa. "Our jet will leave tomorrow morning at 10, if you all can be ready by 9:30 we can drive to the airport together. The trip to Seattle is short but it is very important that we leave at 10 as both Ana and I have afternoon appointments that we need to be in Seattle for."
Christian and I walk through the gardens hand in hand, with security following discretely behind us, back to our villa. Today couldn't have turned out any better, it was exactly what I wanted and hoped for…small, elegant and beautiful.
"You look so beautiful today baby….this dress is perfect just like you are," Christian kisses me deeply as we make our way to the master bedroom.
"Today was perfect…I cannot thank you enough for all of this, it was truly amazing," I sigh.
"As much as I love this dress on you, I love what's under it more," Christian slowly unzips my gown.
We make love several times that night, before finally falling asleep wrapped in each other's arms. Although the last few days have been a whirlwind, I would not have changed any part of it. I am relieved that Christian wasn't too upset about Carrick showing up today; I know deep down that he would regret not having him there one day so I had to do something. I know it's still going to take some time and likely several discussions before Christian and Carrick can move past what happened and probably even more time for me to fully forgive him for what he accused me of but the bottom line is that as of today we are all family which means we can't avoid each other forever. I had gone back and forth about sending the email to Carrick and more importantly if I did send an email what would I say? Ultimately I decided honesty was the best policy; I told Carrick how hurtful his words were to me and tried to reiterate to him that I could care less about his son's money, that it has nothing to do with why I fell in love with Christian in the first place. I let him know that I was still mad and hurt by his words but that I wanted to put all that aside at least for one day and have him at our wedding. He never responded to the email which led me to assume that he wasn't going to come. I was pleasantly surprised and somewhat relieved to see that I was wrong. I had thought things might be awkward with him at the wedding but once again I was wrong. Everyone was a little uneasy but it wasn't awkward or unsettling having him there.
"Are you ready to head back to Seattle?" Christian asks as we pack the last of our clothes up the next morning.
"As wonderful as the last few days have been, I think I'm ready to get back," I admit. "I have my interview this afternoon and then graduation tomorrow to get ready for."
"I'm so proud that you are able to graduate with your class tomorrow, I know how important that was to you," Christian kisses me while pulling me close to him.
"I couldn't have done it without you," I sigh. "If you hadn't spoken to the university and arranged for my professors to let me complete the classes via home study I never would be graduating tomorrow."
"I will do anything for you," he promises.
The flight back to Seattle is quick but just enough time for everyone to share pictures they took from our wedding. We will have the professional pictures sent to us in the next few days so it was nice to see some of the pictures that Grace and Gail were able to take during the ceremony. Christian reminds everyone that we still plan to keep our marriage a secret until the Coping Together Gala in two weeks. It's going to be tough keeping the secret but we both agree that we want some quiet time before the press learns of our marriage which we know will catch everyone off guard. Kate jokes that everyone is going to assume that I'm pregnant and that is the reason for the hushed secret wedding. We all laugh at the likelihood of this assumption, though I can't gage Christian's true reaction. We haven't talked about children yet, it's probably something we need to discuss at some point. I certainly don't want children right now, I would rather wait until my career is established before we take on that adventure. I suppose at some point Christian and I will need to talk about how he feels about having children and whether this is even something he wants.
"Are you ready for your interview?" Christian asks as we get settled back in Escala.
"I think so," I answer. "I have everything I need including several questions prepared."
"Where is the interview at again?" Christian asks.
"Nice try," I smirk. "I will tell you later tonight but I'm not giving you a chance to pull any strings there."
"I really wish you would consider Grey Publishing," Christian says. "You would be a wonderful addition to the team."
"I'm sure I would," I smile. "Can you imagine how that would look? The wife of the owner suddenly lands a job there? People would assume I was only given the job because I'm your wife and they would be right. I want to have some experience under my belt first, maybe in a year or two I will apply for a job there."
"I don't give a fuck about what anyone thinks," Christian mumbles.
"I know you don't baby," I kiss him, sitting on his lap. "But I do. I want to be able to do this myself; it's important to me that I get a job on my own…because I deserve the job not because of my last name or because my husband owns the company."
"I suppose," he sighs.
"I need to get going, I don't want to be late," I kiss him goodbye.
"Be sure Sawyer stays with you," he warns.
"I know," I smile before heading to the foyer where Sawyer is waiting for me.
After a short ride, I am waiting outside of a private office on the third floor of Seattle Grace Hospital. After the accident, having spent way too much time here, I didn't think I would ever want to come back – yet here I sit. I found a job opening on the internet for a part time editor/copy writer for various publications that the hospital puts out regularly. Although my hope was to work at a publishing company, after sending out dozens of resumes and not receiving any calls back I realized that I needed to obtain some sort of experience before a publishing company would likely consider me. When I saw this job posting, I initially rejected the idea of applying – I had no desire to write copy for a hospital or edit health articles. The more I thought about it over the next couple of days, the more I realized this could be a good opportunity to get my feet wet and gain the experience I need. On a whim I submitted my resume and much to my surprise the very next day I received a call inviting me in for an interview.
"Ms. Steele?" a woman asks stepping out of the office across from me.
"Yes, please call me Ana," I reply, shaking her hand.
"My name is Mary, I am the Supervisor of the hospital's publication department. Please come in," she leads me into a moderately sized office.
"Thank you for taking the time to meet with me today," I say.
"This is a newly created position that we are hiring for; it is a part time position although it may become full time in the future depending on the work load. Basically, the position is responsible for editing various publications both digital and print formats as well as occasionally providing copy for brochures or our website. We have two other editors that you will work closely with, splitting the work load as needed to insure that everything is edited and ready for publications by the deadlines provided," she explains. "Tell me about your editing experience."
"I've edited several articles for our college newspaper on various topics. While in high school I was on the year book committee and provided copy for several different areas that were used in the final publication," I explain.
"I reviewed the writing samples you provided with your application and I have to say I was surprised to at your ability given your lack of experience," she compliments.
"Thank you," I reply.
We talk for several additional minutes about the position, the work environment and the expectations of the position. The more we talk the more I'm surprised that I find myself truly interested in the position and the work she is describing. It may not have been my initial dream job, but I find myself looking forward to editing articles and seeing something I worked on in print or on the hospital's website.
"Well, Ana….I am pleased to be able to offer you the position of part time editor/copy writer with the hospital pending your reference checks and clearances," she extends her hand.
"Thank you so much! I am looking forward to working with you," I shake her hand excitedly.
"Assuming everything comes back in time, we can plan for you to start a week from Monday if that works for you?" she asks.
"That sounds perfect," I agree.
"Wonderful, expect an email from the hospital's HR department regarding the next step and documentation that will be needed from you," she says walking me out.
"Thank you again," I reply.
"So? How did it go?" Christian asks the moment I walk into Escala.
"I got a job!" I exclaim.
"I'm so happy for you!" he hugs me tightly, twirling me around the room. "Let's grab some wine and then you can tell me about the job."
"Congratulations," Christian hands me a glass of crisp white wine and we both clink our glasses before taking a sip.
"I am the new part time editor/copy writer at Seattle Grace Hospital," I announce.
"The hospital? Really….I can't say I was expecting that," Christian says clearly surprised.
"I know," I smile. "Neither was I really. I applied to several publishing houses but my application was overlooked which I assume is because I have no real experience. Even the so called entry level jobs wanted some type of experience which I just don't have besides the little bit of editing I did for the school newspaper on occasion. The hospital is expanding their publication department and is looking for someone part time for now but it may move to full time later. I would have preferred something full time but I'm grateful to at least get my foot in the door somewhere."
"The hospital is a great place to work at least according to my mom and she has been there for more than twenty years now," Christian explains. "I've received several of their publications since I've donated quite a bit of money over the years and the material they put it out is top notch. I think this will give you the experience that you are looking for."
"I hope so," I agree. "I will be starting a week from Monday, working mostly in the mornings Monday through Friday. She said I would likely average about 15 to 20 hours per week but occasionally it could be more or less depending on the work load."
"I'm very happy for you Ana," Christian says.
"Me too," I smile. "I'm looking forward to working again."
"You know at any time if you don't want to work you don't have to right?" Christian points out.
"I know I don't have to," I sigh. "I'm not going to live off of your money. For one, I don't feel right spending your money especially when I'm not contributing financially. For another, I need something to do with my time. I can't just sit here all day and not do anything."
"You could always volunteer if you wanted something to do," Christian suggests.
"Hmmmmmmmm," I pause thinking about the possibilities. "That's actually not a bad idea. If I'm only working in the morning, that still leaves the bulk of the day open. Maybe I can find a place to volunteer at…"
"You should talk to my mom," Christian says. "The hospital is always looking for volunteers either on the floors with the patients or on different fund raising committees that they have."
"I just might do that," I say happily. "Once I get settled at my new job though."
"Are you ready for graduation tomorrow? Is there anything you need?" he asks.
"I don't think so. My cap and gown were delivered while we were in New York so there's nothing really for me to do. It's not like I'm giving a speech or anything; there's nothing to prepare for. You're the only person who is really going to be there to see me graduate anyway," I answer.
"Regardless of who is there it's an amazing accomplishment given everything you have been through. You should be proud of yourself," Christian says.
"Let's grab some dinner, I'm hungry," I change the subject, not wanting to dwell on the fact that I really won't have anyone at graduation tomorrow.
"I see you left your rings on today for the interview," Christian says as we sit down for dinner.
"Crap! I didn't even notice! I don't think anyone saw them," I quickly apologize.
"I'm not worried if someone did," he smiles. "I like seeing the rings on you where they belong."
"I'll have to take them off tomorrow for graduation though," I point out. "There's going to be photographers there from not only the school paper but I'm sure local papers."
"Probably," Christian says sadly.
"Just think though, in two weeks they will never have to leave my finger," I remind him.
"Good point Mrs. Grey," Christian kisses me.
"Mrs. Grey….that has a very nice ring to it," I giggle.
Graduation day arrives quickly the next morning; the weather is perfect which is a positive considering the ceremony is scheduled to be outside. I can't imagine the university squeezing everyone into the gym if it rained outside which is always a strong possibility in Seattle. Today is a bitter sweet day; I'm beyond thrilled to finally be graduating from college however I'm sad that my dad couldn't be here. He always told me when I was little that I could do whatever I wanted in life but at the same time he always stressed how important education was. My dad never had the chance to go to college; he joined the military right out of high school and after leaving the military he took a job driving trucks to make a living. I don't know that I believe in Heaven but I would like to think that my dad is watching down on me today.
We arrive to campus about an hour before the ceremony is about to start as Christian needs to meet with the president and a few other key people before the ceremony begins. He complained the entire way to campus how much he hates things like this and doesn't understand why he needs recognition when all he did was right a check. He repeatedly said in the future he is going to insist that donations are made anonymously or under the condition that no public recognition is provided. I couldn't help but giggle at all his whining over this honor; I tried telling him several times that he should be proud that he is able to give back to the community like this but that just made him complain more.
"Ladies and Gentleman, thank you for joining us on this beautiful day to celebrate the hard work of our graduating class. As I look out amongst these students, I see future doctors, lawyers, CEOs, accountants, musicians, educators, child care staff and human services providers. I see strong professionals who are determined to accomplish anything they set their minds too…" The president of our school begins his long speech.
"Thank you President Smith," Kate takes the podium to begin her valedictorian speech. "Over the last four years we have shared so much together. We have cried, cheered, celebrated and struggled together. We have worked harder than we ever thought was possible to achieve what we once thought was only a dream. We have met people that will have forever impacted our lives, we have learned just as much from each other as we have learned from our professors. We have learned how truly strong people can be and how much they can overcome when given the opportunity. We have learned how selfless people can be, how some people can set aside everything to help someone else out. These are the lessons I hope each of you will take with you today."
I quickly wipe the tears from the corner of my eyes as Kate finishes her speech. Her eyes were on me the entire time; I couldn't help but think she was referring to me during at least a portion of her speech. Kate has truly been my one constant over the last four years, the one person who I could count on for anything even when I was afraid to ask for help. She never once asked me about my past, to this day she hasn't asked me anything about what she heard at Grace and Carrick's house that night. She never asked me why I didn't like to be touched or about the scars that I know she saw when we went to the club that night. Kate has done more for me in the last four years than I think she will ever know.
"Thank you Ms. Kavanaugh," Christian says taking the podium for his speech next. "I was asked to give a small speech and to hand out diplomas today as a thank you for my donation to several different programs on campus. My public relations department tells me this is an honor, my family tells me this is a wonderful thing and my girlfriend tells me that I should be proud that I am able to give back to the community. Honestly, I prefer to not receive the recognition for doing something as simple as writing a check to fund programs that will better the lives of those less fortunate. Many of the programs I support here are geared at helping third world countries grow food, enable them to have clean water or finding ways to bring medical treatments to those in need. It is not I who deserves recognition for simply writing a check; it is you who deserve the recognition. You are the ones on the forefront, making these advances to better the lives of others. It is you who deserve the attention, the recognition and the honor for what you have done and for what you are about to do as you leave here today college graduates. You have an opportunity when you leave here today to do what you want, to do what you have dreamed all of your lives of doing. When you living your dream, I ask you to take a moment and think of those who are not able to live their dreams. Think of those who are addicted to drugs, who are living in poverty, who are homeless, who are working three jobs just to put food on their table, to those who are struggling with their own demons and to those are too young or too afraid to ask for help. When you can, while living your dream, look for opportunities to help those who are less fortunate. You may not be able to write a check, but there are plenty of other ways to help. Volunteer your time, raise awareness for various causes…find a way to help; there is always a way. As you go forward today, remember where you have come from and remember how you got here today."
Christian's speech was just as moving as Kate's was; I heard many students commenting about how honest his speech was. I know that as of this morning he had no speech prepared and had no idea what he was going to say, at least that's what he told me. Somehow I knew that once he stepped up there he would find exactly what he wanted to say. His speech reinforced with me his idea of volunteering until I find a full time job, once I get comfortable in my new position at the hospital I'm going to speak with Grace and see about volunteering at the hospital in some capacity.
"Congratulations Mrs. Grey," Christian whispers in my ear as he kisses me on cheek and hands me my diploma.
"Thank you Mr. Grey," I whisper before walking off the stage.
Several hours later the ceremony finally concludes, all diplomas have been handed out and the president of the university congratulates us one final time before announcing that we are all finally college graduates. I wait near the side of the stage for Christian at the spot we previously agreed to meet.
"Congratulations Ana!" Mia screams rushing up to me, hugging me quickly.
"Mia! What are you doing here?" I ask surprised.
"Watching my sister graduate from college of course," she smiles as she says sister very quietly.
"Congratulations dear," Grace hugs me quickly.
"You should be very proud Ana," Carrick kisses me gently on the cheek.
"I wasn't expecting to see you guys here today," I gush.
"We wouldn't have missed it," Grace assures me.
"Congratulations baby," Christian pulls me against him.
"Did you know they were coming?" I ask as everyone talks about the speeches.
"Of course, they all wanted to see you graduate," he assures me.
"Congratulations Ana! Sorry I'm late I had to wait forever for Kate to finish talking to everyone," Elliot and Kate join us.
"It means so much to me that you are all here," I say, desperately trying to hold back the tears.
"You're family now Ana, of course we would be here," Mia says.