Thank you for all of your support. These times haven't been easy on anyone, but I appreciate you guys sticking with me and being okay with this. To LadyRed01, I have taken you up on your suggestions and tried WayBack Machine but that didn't pan out. I'm in the process of contacting Fanfiction, but they haven't gotten back to me yet so I'm just going to keep on writing anyway. I also reached out to my friend who used to be like an editor to see if she had anything saved and she had some notes saved so I'm going to use what she sent me to keep going. I'm looking into Reddit now to see if I can find some of there too.
I can't remember everything I did, but I'm trying to recreate the story with a similar sense of family and love that I had before. I'm annoyed right now, but I am doing my best to have quick updates and get the story back to where it was. There have been some character name changes to accommodate the story itself like Alex Karvelle's name has been changed to Logan Turner and Charlotte's biological father's name is Dean Adkins and not Robert Perry. I guess this will give me the chance to fix stuff.
Chapter 2- Catch My Breath
"Excuse me, I think you're…well you're wrong." JJ feels her breath catch; the electric jolt that is this news doesn't even seem to jolt her back to reality. Of all the theories JJ concocted on her drive home, this definitely wasn't one of them. She shares a sideways glance with her husband who offers her a sympathetic yet confused frown.
Charlie rolls her eyes, annoyed. "No I'm not. You gotta sign this so I can get emancipated."
The sound of Michael fussing on the monitor echoes softly into the room. Will looks at JJ, exchanging a second private conversation, she nods letting him know she can deal with this girl and he can tend to their son."Yah know I'm gonna letcha handle this Cher." He clears his throat before nodding at the fourteen year old who huffs back at him.
"Okay," JJ waits until he's left the room before speaking sternly. "I'm sorry sweetie, but you're mistaken. I don't have a daughter." She almost did, her fourteenth birthday would've been exactly two weeks ago. The pain of seeing a child near her dead daughter's age and proclaiming herself to be that child causes unfounded anger to course through JJ's very being. A part of her wants to slap this kid, but the rational FBI Agent in her knows striking people for being malicious is illegal.
"So you didn't have a kid on July 9th 2002 at Saint Mary's Hospital in Pittsburgh with a one night stand?" Charlie is pissed off, she's been waiting here for nearly three hours and this woman is now denying the truth. She's either delusional or a bitch, either way, Charlie is ready to snap. "The guy's name was never on the birth certificate so I'm just guessing here."
JJ's mouth visibly twitches. How the hell would she know that? Only her parents, Danny, and Tess know that. Not even Will knows that detail. JJ told him the father's name, but not that she deliberately left him off the birth certificate. "Where are you getting this information?" The profiler demanded, angry with this girl for knowing intimate details of her personal life.
"You answer me first!" Charlie is belligerent. "Did you have a baby in 2002?"
"It, she wasn't from a one night stand," JJ corrects the first assumption and takes a deep breath to compose herself, "but my daughter was stillborn. I don't know how you found out about any of this–"
Charlie cuts in. "Pretty sure, this isn't The Walking Dead or Zombieland." She opts for not bothering herself with the fact that Jennifer kept off her father's name. Charlie is actually grateful because it saves her from having this conversation twice. She studies the woman, realizing she actually believes what she's saying, Charlie sighs as she rubs her neck. "Look, okay I'm not here for like money or anything. I just need to get emancipated."
"What?" JJ can't wrap her head around this, it's too crazy. There has to be a plausible explanation, maybe an UNSUB is targeting her. That would make more sense than some random kid showing up on her doorstep saying she's her dead daughter. This feels like a sick joke; losing two children over the course of twelve years is a burden that weighs down on JJ every day. Will only knows about her first baby's death after he found her sobbing in the bathroom one night when she was pregnant with Henry and they talked about it until sunrise. "What are you…I don't even…"
"Jennifer," Charlie huffed as she raises her hands to calm herself down. "Fourteen years ago, you and some guy who wasn't a one nighter had a kid. You gave up that kid. I'm that kid and now I'm applying for emancipation, so just sign it so I can leave and you can pretend I'm dead." The pain of saying that out loud stings more than Charlie will ever admit. "When I was putting together the paperwork for my hearing, it turns out you didn't sign a permanent release of rights or whatever." She hands the crumpled paper over gently. "My social worker was gonna take forever, so…look that uh doesn't even matter. Well, u-until you sign this you're still legally, my mom."
JJ looks over the paper, scrutinizing every word. She used to do this when she had to choose which case the team was going to assist on. It wasn't any easier back then either. This document, has all the right stuff; her name, her date of birth, the baby she thought died date of birth, and even the birth weight and height. Of course there's no mention of Dean, a twenty-three year old JJ didn't want to tell him. She almost decided to tell him after, but because their child died; she kept the secret to herself. It was one JJ planned on taking with her to the grave.
"I can't sign this." JJ tries to hand it back, but the kid shoves her hands into her pockets.
"No! Come on, please, look I know you convinced yourself I died or whatever, but I didn't. So sign this and I swear you'll never see me again." Charlie's voice bridges on complete desperation. "You can go back to thinking I'm dead…and I'll go back to thinking you're a drug addict. See, we can both be uh delusional yeah delusional a-and just sign it!"
The profiler pinches the bridge of her nose. "Charlie, right?" She nods looking angry and weary. "I can't sign this, it's not that I don't want to; it's because I'm not your mother. I'm sorry." JJ explained feeling weak at the knees at the thought of her little girl. At least now she knows though she isn't dealing with a sociopath, this girl truly believes she's her mom. JJ feels a twinge of sadness for her; clearly she's been given the wrong information.
"Jennifer, if you don't sign this then…the thing is my emancipation hearing is the day after tomorrow so please sign it and I'll go." Charlie pleaded her exhaustion getting the best of her.
"I'm not signing this, sorry." JJ said although she has half a mind to, to help the kid out.
"Why?" Charlie whined.
JJ knows this has to be hard for her to understand. "I'm not your mother. There must have been a mix-up and…and I'm not your mother."
"Yes you are! Look at the paper; it has your name and birthday and my name and birthday! It's not even one of those death papers, it's a birth one." Charlie exclaimed her voice rising angrily. JJ glances upstairs; cringing as Henry's voice can be heard asking Will why the girl is shouting so much and if she knows that yelling in houses that don't belong to her isn't okay. Under normal circumstances, JJ would find that innocent assessment adorable and funny, but right now she's more concerned with Henry overhearing something he shouldn't.
"Okay, we're leaving." JJ declared sternly, taking the girl by her upper arm while grabbing her purse with the free hand. If she were anyone else, JJ's pretty sure she wouldn't have been able to restrain Charlie and keep her purse from falling. "Stop squirming," she sighs her tone softening. "Just calm, down sweetie."
Charlie freezes at the sentiment and her struggles renews. "Lemme go, where're you taking me?"
"The FBI, we're going to figure this out once and for all." The woman keeps her grip firm, all while making sure she doesn't bruise the girl. She's more or less gripping Charlie's oversized t-shirt, but that's beside the point. JJ has to prove to Charlie she isn't her mother, once she does maybe then she can help the fourteen year old find her real parents.
"Are you insane? You can't just go to the FBI!" The fourteen year old continues to wriggle against JJ's strong hold, twisting with everything she's got. There haven't been many people who have ever man-handled her like this. The one's that have tried, like Rick Dalton, often struggled to keep a grasp on her because she would often take off. Bug often marveled at Charlie's ability to run away without getting caught. However, Jennifer grabbing her so suddenly stunned her and the teenager is also kind of worn out. Looking into the woman's eyes, Charlie can tell she's a decent person so she goes for a verbal sucker punch. "You're hurting me."
At those words alone, JJ instantly releases the girl. She takes note of the clear fear and traces of worry dashing through the teenager's eyes and feels guilty for being the cause of it. The mother in her has never wanted to be the cause of a child's pain. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to–"
"All I wanted was your signature!" Charlie exclaimed taking a step away from JJ. Tears of frustration rush to her eyes as she sits down on the front step trying not to cry. "It would've taken like two seconds from your life."
"I'm not your mother, sweetie." JJ sits down next to her, giving the girl a sad look. Her gaze becomes sympathetic as Charlie glances over at her. "As a federal agent and parent myself, I can't knowingly sign something that isn't true. That would be fraud and I think forgery too."
"You're a fed?" She asked quietly, that's a new one. Charlie convinced herself her mom was either a drug addict or hooker. It was easier to pretend her mother was a person who couldn't possibly take care of her than an actual human being who could, but chose not to. JJ nods slowly. "Don't you make the laws or something? You can just sign this and then we're done." Without meaning to, Charlie shows her age and amusement flickers through the federal agent's eyes.
JJ stated. "That's not what federal agents do. We don't make the laws, we enforce them. As a federal agent I can't sign this knowing you could end up in harm's way because of it. I'd be responsible." She stands up and walks down the remaining steps. "Now come on, we've got to go."
"What for?"
"I'm going to prove to you I'm not your mother by running a DNA test on you." JJ rises to her feet and offers the girl a hand. "Maybe after I show you I'm not, I can help direct you to your real parents."
"But–" the girl began only to stop short. The only way she's going to be able to show Jennifer she isn't lying is by doing this so Charlie's decided to hell with it. "Fine, I'll go with you…but how do I know you aren't gonna kill me or something? I watch TV, shit like that could happen."
A smile quirks JJ's lips upward, Charlie's a smart kid; she'll give her that. "I'll put my purse in the back seat and you can get in first to look around. Does that sound fair to you? I don't how else I could show you short of giving you my gun." Charlie's eyes become wide in excitement causing JJ to roll her own. "That was a joke; I'm not giving you my gun. You're just a kid. I could go to jail for something like that. Here, you can hold my badge if that'll make you feel better too." She rifles through her purse before offering the badge to Charlie, who takes it and goes to the passenger side of the car only to jingle the door impatiently. "Hey," JJ clipped forgetting for a millisecond she isn't dealing with an impatient seven year old. "I-I mean, wait a second for me to get my keys out."
The first fifteen minutes of the drive is in silence. JJ drums her fingers against the steering wheel while Charlie sits in the passenger seat clutching onto her backpack. The mother in JJ wasn't sure what to say when this tiny kid plopped into the passenger seat. She knows her sister-in-law and brother let her nieces, Nicole and Laura sit in the front when they were about twelve. Nic and Lulu weren't chubby by any means, but they fit the weight requirements more than JJ believes the girl brooding beside her does. J has to admit the grumpy kid is adorable with those red-blonde curls and big blue eyes. She'll no doubt be a beauty once she finishes going through puberty. Her eyes look familiar too, JJ can't place them but there's something oddly familiar about those deep blue eyes.
"Hey, so how old are you anyway?"
"You don't know that already?" Charlie's voice is soft, softer than it's been all day. She's not even going to bother trying to hide her weariness anymore. This afternoon has been draining both emotionally and physically. "I just turned fourteen two weeks ago."
As her answer resonates with JJ, the woman frowns. Based on her limited knowledge that's younger than average age to get emancipated. "And you're trying to get emancipated?"
"Yep," Charlie responded flatly.
JJ doesn't even bother to hide her shock. "Is that even legal? I mean, you're barely fourteen." If her legal studies course during undergrad is anything to go off of, getting emancipated is a lot of work on the young adult; they have to prove they have a stable income, an adequate residence, and well…JJ can't remember all of it. She did only get a B in that class after all. "I thought most kids got emancipated at around sixteen or seventeen, not fourteen."
"Some do," Charlie is evasive. She can't tell the real reason she wants to get emancipated without getting Alma in trouble and maybe herself too. "I couldn't wait though." The fourteen year old wants to make sure no one is any wiser about Alma. Her current social worker, Tanya, was supposed to do a checkup with Alma but fortunately Tanya had to back out due to her kids getting sick.
"Why?" JJ asked before she can stop herself. "I mean are you sure that's what you really want?" Being a mom she could never imagine Henry or Michael getting emancipated at fourteen. Hell, JJ knows her nieces who are seventeen and fifteen aren't anywhere near ready to be on their own. Nik can't balance a checkbook yet and Lulu occasionally needs to be reminded to walk the dog. They're still just kids in the grand scheme of things and that's okay.
The young girl's tone is dejected, almost like she has no choice. "You wouldn't understand."
"You still have time to find a family." JJ tries to get a read off her as she takes the third exit off the highway. She can tell Charlie's feeling exasperated, but there's something else going on too.
"No I don't." Charlie's head snaps over to her. The dark circles under her eyes tell JJ more than the girl's said in the last half hour. She doesn't want to get emancipated, but has also resigned herself to the fact that she likely will never get adopted either. JJ's heart constricts, poor kid. "Don't you watch TV? People only want babies. I'm past the window." Charlie isn't dumb. Out of the three homes she's been placed in two were good and one wasn't. The only reason she had to leave from the McCall's was because she got hurt when another girl set a fire there. In Alma's case, she doesn't want to go but knows once Tanya finds out about Alma, she'll have to. "Look, no offense, but you kind of don't know what you're talking about…getting adopted at my age is just…it's not a thing." Alma needs her. Charlie looks after her especially at night because Alma's taken to wandering the streets looking for her lost cat Leo, even though he died last year. During the day, Alma is more able to take care of herself or at least that's what Charlie tells herself because sometimes she just needs a break.
JJ refrains from stating her opinion about emancipation at fourteen. "You know, maybe we could find a match to someone in the system and find relatives for you." She tries to sound hopeful, but at Charlie's doubtful snort she swallows hard.
"I hope not." JJ glances over, surprised. "I've watched Law and Order, the only people on those things are in jail or did crimes and are out of jail and like…they aren't good people, so if you aren't actually my mother then I hope she's not in there." Charlie explained although she highly doubts it, because she knows the woman driving the speed limit beside her is her mother.
"There are more than just criminals in the database; there are also people in the armed forces, cops, firefighters, and others with government jobs." The blonde explained.
A thought strikes Charlie as she taps on the window lightly. "You know, actually, it'd be way easier if my mother was in jail then I could give her like fifty bucks and she'd sign whatever I wanted."
"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear you just say you'd bribe someone to sign a government form." JJ resists the urge to smile at the girl's statemtn. If anything, Charlie's words proves she still needs parents to guide her. She flicks on her indicator to turn right into the FBI building. "You know, if you want, I could help you find your real parents after this. I don't agree you should get emancipated at your age, but maybe finding them could help you."
Sitting back in the chair with a long sigh, Charlie huffs. "This doesn't even matter anyway cause you're my mother, not some drugged out Piper Chapman."
The rest of the car ride, meaning another two more minutes, is in silence. Luckily, no one JJ really knows is around to ask any questions as to why she has a kid with her. JJ fretted about this on the ride over, if she did see someone she knew; she worried her lip about what she'd say. Thankfully, most of everyone she knows has left for the day. It's a good thing too, because JJ knows for a fact someone would have stopped her solely because Charlie can't seem to stop staring at everything she sees. At one point, JJ nearly took her hand to drag the fourteen year old along when she found the space beside her empty for the third time.
Yes, JJ agrees, going to the FBI for the first time is an exciting experience. She remembers when she first stepped into the building; intimidated at first, but also excited too. However, they're on a mission, one they can't deter from to see the sights. There will be time for that when JJ breaks the news to Charlie that she isn't her mother. A tour of the FBI could cheer her up, JJ guesses as they step off the elevator to talk to the lead lab technician, Juan Martinez. She speaks in hushed tones, wanting to make sure Charlie doesn't hear much if anything at all. Luckily, Juan's promised not to reveal the results or reason for this visit to anyone.
On her part, the fourteen year old is too busy staring at all the machines to bother paying any mind to what Jennifer is saying. Although, one aspect of the FBI she didn't like, is getting her mouth swabbed it felt like she was at the doctor's except way more awkward. At least the weird hospital smell isn't here, all Charlie smells is cleaning products and chicken curry; an odd combination, but one she doesn't detest.
"How long will it take?" JJ asked after he finishes swabbing her mouth and puts it in a tube.
Juan considers her question. "An hour at the most, you can hang out here or I can email you the results." If it was up to him, he'd email her the results. He isn't sure how the renowned Jennifer Jareau will react to this news and he'd also prefer not to deal with the reaction of a teenager either. Having two teenagers himself, they're more unpredictable than temperamental criminals.
"You can email them to me." The profiler reads his face, noticing the tenseness around his eyes and the way he glances at the laboratory doors. "I have some files I need to look at anyway. Come on, Charlie; let's leave Agent Martinez alone now." Charlie shrugs mumbling 'whatever' and 'thank you' under her breath as she follows the blonde out of the room causing Juan to heave a sigh of relief.
"Thank god they left." He murmured, turning to administer the DNA samples into the mass spectrometer.
Charlie follows JJ into the elevator watching as she pushes a button for the third floor. The inside of the FBI kind of looks similar to a regular office especially the muted walls, Charlie noted, minus the whole lab downstairs thing. Charlie's first foster father, James McCall, was a video game designer and his office looked like the inside of an arcade mixed with a coffee shop. Going there was a favorite for Charlie because it meant she got alone time with James, who was usually busy with a new game or busy trying to do stuff around the house for Jenna or one of the other girls staying there. Charlie remembers James McCall as being a good guy; he never ticked off any of her weirdo boxes and treated them all kindly. Her other father dad, Rick Dalton, worked in construction so he didn't have an office and preferred they didn't disrupt him at a site. As for her foster mothers: Jenna McCall wrote science fiction novels from home, Linda Dalton is a Catholic school teacher, and Alma Bertram worked at a museum until she retired about four months ago.
They had normal-ish professions, well jobs that had them home for dinner every night. The teen is realizing Jennifer doesn't have a normal job. "It's so weird you're a fed." She said as some person steps closer to the wall to avoid bumping into them. "It's also weird people are scared of you too."
JJ rolls her eyes. "No one's scared of me."
"You call that dude melting into the wall not being scared?" The girl looks doubtful. "Hey, do you kill people? Are you an assassin?" Charlie quizzed without noticing that they've stopped walking and JJ is knocking on someone's door.
"I don't kill people." The profiler commented, not sure if she's lying or not. It doesn't matter anyway; kids shouldn't know about the stuff they do. JJ wouldn't want Henry or Michael learning about the people she's killed so this kid doesn't get to know either. When the boys are old enough to ask more questions, she and Will plan on keeping things quiet. They'll tell them they try to stop bad people, but that's it. As Charlie opens her mouth to question further, the door is yanked open by a brightly dressed blonde. "Penelope Garcia, meet Charlotte Riley, Charlotte Riley meet Agent Garcia."
Charlie is blunt. "You don't look like the agents I see on TV." The girl receives a look from JJ, but she shrugs ignoring the slight warning flickering in the woman's eyes. Jennifer keeps saying she isn't her mother, Charlie has decided she doesn't have the right to give her mom eyes.
"Oh and how do agents on TV look?" Penelope asked, not sounding mad in the slightest. Instead she sounds more amused than anything else. She's used to people judging her appearance, but what she isn't used to is, bluntness. This little carrot top is getting some brownie puts for her honesty.
"Boring," Charlie decided as a woman wearing gray slacks walks by. "Like her," she points.
"Don't be rude." JJ groaned ushering them into the office causing Garcia to laugh. Charlie shrugs with a grin of her own as Penelope chuckles again, studying her. Normally, Charlie wouldn't like someone staring at her with such intensity, but Agent Garcia seems kind of cool. JJ blinks. "Wait, a minute, I just realized something; do your foster parents know where you are? Do they know you decided to go on this half-baked adventure?"
"It's just one foster, Alma, and no she doesn't but as long as I don't make waves; I can do what I want."
JJ asked, "And what do you call what you're doing today?"
"A puddle," Charlie smirked causing JJ to pinch the bridge of her nose in an attempt to keep from laughing outright at the clever response.
"Ooh I think I like you." Penelope giggled which earns her a scowl from JJ. She shrugs; the kid is funny. She examines the pair, charmed by how frustrated JJ is. Garcia loves her godsons with all her heart, but JJ and Will need some trouble to stir things up. It'll make up for the fact that Garcia knows Will was probably a hell-raiser. "I kind of hope she is related to you." JJ and Charlie glance at her, the older of the two bemused. "C'mon Jayje, the little Cupcake is hilarious, ooh wait with your strawberry curls you're like Strawberry Shortcake!" Now it's Charlie turn to look annoyed and JJ's to smirk at the girl's expression. "Hey, did you see the vending machines near my office?" Charlie nods as Garcia fishes in her purse for a few extra dollars. "Here, get yourself a snack."
"You're gonna talk about me aren't you?" Charlie knows a brush off when she hears one and Agent Garcia is doing that in spades. Penelope gives her a pleading look. "Okay, thank you ma'am." She accepts the money and begins leaving when she's suddenly yanked backwards by her school bag.
"Eww, unless you want to be photo-shopped never call me that again baby cakes." Garcia ordered shuddering at the thought of even being close to a ma'am.
Charlie nods, readjusting her backpack as she starts to walk away again. This time, she looks over her shoulder as though checking to make sure Penelope doesn't grab her for round two. JJ's worried voice floats through the air. "Don't wander, just get a soda and come back." She doesn't trust Charlie, yes she thinks the teenager is an okay kid, but she strikes JJ as being a runner.
"Where do you think I'd go? I'm in the FBI. I don't think I'd get far." The fourteen year old would be lying if she said she hadn't thought about ditching, but she needs Jennifer's signature. It'll help Alma, because Charlie knows once Tanya sees how confused Alma's gotten at the check-up/check-in that's meant to happen in three days she'll get a new placement. But, Charlie doesn't want to go, Alma needs her and in a way she needs Alma too. If she leaves Alma's she may end up in a shitty home with a bunch of other kids and anyway, Charlie's been with Alma for nearly three years. She likes it there; it's her best home yet.
Garcia waits until the door is shut. She flicks on one of her hall cameras causing JJ to frown. "How long have you had those?" The profiler questioned wondering just how much of their lives Penelope sees and if she has hidden cameras anywhere else.
"Doesn't matter," Penelope waves her off. Upon seeing that Charlie isn't standing near the door to eavesdrop, Garcia turns her chair around to face JJ. "Okay, we need to talk in private without prying and adorably sassy teenage ears listening." She smiles at the eye roll she gets. Taking on a more solemn tone, Garcia studies JJ. "You gave birth at Saint Mary's in Pittsburgh right?"
"Yes, where're you going with this Garcia?"
Penelope chews on her lower lip. There are aspects to her job she doesn't like. Delving into someone's personal life is one of them, especially when that life is that of a fourteen year old foster kid. "Well when you asked me to look into things so I did."
"And what'd you find?" JJ asked almost afraid of the answer.
"They had a huge story there two years ago. Did you ever hear about Doctor Robert Willis?" Garcia asked in a quiet almost too serious way, which worries JJ, because in all their years of knowing one another Penelope has rarely if ever been this grave.
"I think I remember my mom sending me something about him." Honestly, the profiler can't recall much but it had something to do with a doctor giving away babies in Pennsylvania.
Garcia nods. "Well he was a baddie's baddie, total misogynist, sexist, racist, all of the ists' really." The usually bubbly blonde takes a breath. "I'll give you the abridged version, in Doc Willis's reign of terror or turmoil, several babies of unwed mothers or parents that may be on the poorer side died mysteriously. Only for the hospital to miraculously adopt out a baby a day or so later to a wealthy couple, long story short; Willis was reported and investigated where it was found he kidnapped several infants and gave them away."
"Pen, what does this have to do with me?" JJ's tone is shaking; she hasn't felt this nervous in a long time. The first was when she found out she was pregnant in 2002, then in 2008, again in 2011, and finally in 2016.
"Well you know how twisted drama tends to get entangled in our family well I dived even further and found the Titanic; Robert Willis was the primary physician delivering your baby back then." Penelope explained feeling a sense of pity envelop in her eyes as she studies her best friend.
"S-So you're saying maybe my daughter didn't die?" The other blonde said, glancing up at the ceiling in an attempt to keep the tears at bay. "That Dr. Willis told me she did because he didn't like single mothers!" She feels her voice breaking as it gets louder.
"I mean there's a possibility, Sunshine." Garcia stands up from her desk to take JJ's hands. "Also says here that Willis is in prison awaiting his trial. I forget how long the court system takes when it comes to doling out justice. I'm so used to the Magnificent Seven catching the bad guys and putting them away, I forget there's a system and that system sometimes sucks."
JJ opens her mouth to say more, but a voice from behind startles them . "So you weren't lying…about thinking I was dead. They told you I died so…so that's what you thought." Charlie shuts the door behind her still holding the can of Sprite. She really thought Jennifer was just…well lying and making up an excuse to save her own ass. If she'd known Jennifer wasn't, then maybe Charlie would've been nicer. "You weren't lying before."
"I wasn't lying before." JJ repeated quietly, she takes a step towards Charlie only for the teen to sidestep away. This is all too much, Charlie thought. This wasn't how today was supposed to go. The profiler sees the sense of anxiety flood Charlie's eyes and decides to give her a second to digest all of this. She can feel Pen's eyes on her and honestly, JJ isn't sure what to do either. She glances at Charlie, deciding to do what she's done with Henry when he's anxious. "Do you want to talk?"
Charlie suddenly doesn't feel thirsty anymore. "No." She puts the can of Sprite on Penelope's desk.
"I think we should call your foster parent." JJ scrubs a hand over her face. She isn't working off much sleep and this is just as draining for her as it must be for Charlie. "We should tell her where you are."
"She thinks I'm at a friend's house."
JJ's eyebrows shoot up and in a matter-of-fact tone, she states. "You lied."
"What's it matter to you?" The strawberry blonde asked feeling a lot of emotions ping off one another. She can't seem to land on which feeling to feel though. Everything feels so heavy right now. Charlie can't describe it, but she's not sure what's going to happen next and that feeling is terrifying.
Before JJ can respond, her phone buzzes and she glances down at the email from Juan. Flicking her phone open and clicking into the app, the woman swallows hard. "I'm your mother." She stares at Charlie who quickly averts her gaze, opting to glance anywhere else, rather than look at the woman who wanted her but didn't know she even existed. JJ suddenly feels like her legs are made of jelly.
"Ooh, looks like you have yourself a little girl Jayje, congratulations!" Penelope breaks the awkward silence with excited clapping. There's going to be another member of their makeshift ragtag family. "I can sort of see the family resemblance, minus the red hair, but that's your best feature so don't be ashamed of it Shortcake. You have your mom's eyes, aww you do the raised eyebrow thing that she does. That's adorable." Charlie rubs at her eyebrows as though punishing them for behaving in a way that resembles JJ.
"I uh okay," Charlie finds her voice again. This time, it's much softer than before. She reaches into her backpack and pulls out the crumpled piece of paper. "Here," JJ opens her mouth too stunned to speak. "You said you'd sign it when we found out you were my mom."
JJ hesitates, staring down at the paper. "I'm not signing that, kiddo."
"What?" The fourteen year olds eyes widen at the perceived injustice. "But you said you–"
"I know what I said, but that was before, when I thought there was no chance of you being my daughter but since you are then–"
"Then we have nothing to talk about." Charlie cuts her off. She has to do this or else Alma's going to get in trouble and be all alone. The red haired girl can't do that, not after Alma's been so nice to her these last three years. It'd be the ultimate slap in the face.
The blonde haired parent shares a look with Garcia who shrugs. "Of course we do. You're my kid."
Charlie objected. "No, no I'm not. You're my birth mother. That's it. I'm not your kid. Your kids are at your house with your husband. I'm nothing to you and you're nothing to me." Hurt forms across JJ's face and stays there while Garcia gasps at the girl's words. Charlie, having realized what she just said hangs her head guiltily. Jennifer didn't know she was alive. Neither one is at fault which for some reason annoys Charlie even more, because it feels like she should be mad at someone. "Sorry, I didn't mean it like…I didn't mean it to sound so bitchy okay? No offense, but I haven't had a mom in a long time, I don't need one now."
"At least let me give you a ride to wherever you're staying." JJ offered with the small hope that this will give her a chance to be with her daughter for longer. "You don't have any idea where you are. I'm not going to let you just wander around the streets, hoping to find a bus that'll take you home." Charlie makes a face, Jennifer has a point, but she sounds so...so mom-ish. The act alone confuses the teenager. "So, I'll give you two choices let me take you home or I ask Agent Garcia–"
"Auntie Pen," Garcia immediately corrects her best friend.
JJ rolls her eyes with a small smile creasing her cheeks. "Auntie Pen to take you home, either way I'm not letting you go off by yourself when it's getting dark out."
Charlie glances from JJ to Garcia, gauging her options. The techie is giving her a very firm look to choose her mother so the teenager sighs, deciding to throw JJ a bone. "You can take me to Ben's house." She glances at JJ who smiles slightly. "I told Alma I was gonna sleep there anyway."
"You have sleepovers at boy's houses?" JJ can't keep the maternal worry at bay. In hind sight, she doesn't even know if her daughter likes boys, but the thought of her fourteen year old in bed with a boy isn't sitting well.
"Yep and I go potty all by myself too." Charlie sassed causing Penelope to snicker. The look she gets from JJ could cut through glass. The teenager swallows and offers an innocent look. "Relax, I sleep on the couch." That's technically true because Charlie starts out sleeping there, but more often than not; she crawls into bed beside Ben. It isn't for anything sexual, she just finds comfort in him being there.
JJ nods accepting that answer, it isn't like she has much of a say in things anyway. "Good." She shoots her Pen a glare only to get a shrug in return. The techie can't help it; Charlie has that same Jareau sass Garcia only sees when JJ's being flirted with someone gross or if she's got a buzz on. Hearing JJ's daughter quick-witted retort is amusing. "Let's go now before traffic is bad." JJ points to the door as Charlie shrugs waving goodbye to Garcia who waves goodbye back. The mother turns to her best friend. "Seriously?"
"Sorry, I can't help it; she's funny." Garcia snickered.
"She is, but I'm not going to tell her that." JJ chuckles in agreement, half wondering if she should be scolding Charlie for being so rude. The tiny mom part of her is lecturing her for letting Charlie talk to her that way, but her better judgment says she should wait until they're more comfortable with each other. "Can you keep this between us Pen? I kind of don't want anyone knowing right now."
Penelope vowed. "My lips are sealed." JJ raises her eyebrows, not quite believing her. Garcia huffs before pouting slightly as she takes into account her track record. "I'll try to keep them sealed."
"Thank you, that's all I ask." JJ knows her best friend is an amazing person, but she also recalls from experience just how terrible Garcia is at keeping secrets. This way by Monday, JJ likely won't have to re-explain to anyone about having a mysterious teenager pop into her life. With that, the mother walks away to make sure her kid hasn't wandered off or gotten twitchy and just left.
Garcia sits back down, giggling as she begins to pack up her things. She mused. "This is going to be so much fun."
JJ turns onto the highway, trying to come to terms with the information she's just been told and also attempting to get a solid read off Charie. The girl seems to be in her own world. Her eyes are so distant, like she has the weight of the world on her shoulders. JJ wants to reach out and pull the girl into a hug, but she doesn't think Charlie would react very well and also, she's driving…where the mother doesn't know. The only time Charlie has spoken since Penelope's was to tell her, her friend Ben's address which JJ plugged into her phone for directions. After Google Maps started spewing off instructions was the moment the fourteen year old stapled her lips shut.
This isn't going to be an easy conversation for either of them. But, JJ's decided since she's the adult, she has to act like it. Taking a deep breath, JJ turns the music down. "Charlie–" She began.
"Who's my father?" The girl questioned completely cutting her mother off. For most of her life, Charlie assumed her dad was akin to a sperm donor. Actually, when she was younger, she didn't even consider him in the mix; she simply wanted a mother. Having a father didn't seem to equate to feelings of jealously Charlie had whenever she saw kids in her class with their mothers. However, now that she's older, Charlie's wondered about his identity and now that she knows he wasn't a one night stand, she's genuinely curious.
"What?" JJ is thrown off by the demand. She hoped she'd have more time until Charlie quizzed her on the identity of her father. Dean is a sore subject for JJ. He was her first real heartbreak and also the first guy she told she loved.
Charlie finally looks up from her hands as JJ takes the fourth exit. "My father, you said he wasn't some random."
"He wasn't."
"Well, who is he then?"
The blonde profiler stops at a red light to appraise her confused child. She wishes she could take all of Charlie's pain. Regardless of how much pain these memories bubbling to the surface bring, JJ ignores it and soldiers on. "His name's Dean Akins." Her voice is soft and normally Charlie would've noticed the agony in Jennifer's tone, but right now, her more childish side wants answers.
"Why didn't you put his name on the birth certificate?" The strawberry blonde asked curling her toes in her shoes and finding the crackle that occurs thereafter satisfying.
JJ takes a deep breath. "I was selfish." She's honest. That's the easiest way she knows how to do this without anything coming back to bite her in the butt. "Dean and I got together the summer before my first year of grad school." She was twenty-two and thought they'd be together forever despite what his parents thought of her and what her parents, Danny, and Tess felt either. To be frank, Danny didn't like Dean from the get go. He thought Dean was pompous and entitled, Tess had similar sentiments especially when Dean refused to help entertain a two year old Nic while newborn Lulu along with her weary parents rested. "We were together until Christmastime. Then he broke up with me and I never heard from him again." Charlie stays quiet, listening as her biological mother explains what happened through her eyes. "I found out I was pregnant on New Year's Eve and every time I tried to reach out, he ignored me. I guess in the end, I decided we were better off."
"Do you think we would've been, better off I mean." Charlie's question is fair and straight to the point, traits JJ is certain she picked up from both sides of the family.
"Yeah, I do." The mother responded without question. JJ has a feeling the Adkins family would've bullied her into getting an abortion or threatened to take her baby. "Dean isn't a bad guy. I mean I don't know if he is or isn't anymore because it's been fourteen years and we've grown up, but at the time, we would've been better off."
Charlie nods, accepting that answer. She also makes a mental note to do a Google search on Dean Adkins, from how Jennifer talks about him; he must have a Wikipedia page. The fourteen year old plays with the hem of her shirt before asking, "Do I look like him?"
The car slows to a halt at a Stop sign. JJ takes a good look at the kid squirming beside her. She has the same blue eyes as Henry, Michael's button nose, her chin, and most of her facial features. The only thing that JJ knows differs from their family is the hair – and honestly, that's her favorite part about Charlie. Her hair is unique, which makes her even more special in the mother's eyes. JJ guesses Charlie got it from Dean's mom, Nancy Adkins, has a similar color except Nancy's in an eccentric burnt orange. Charlie's chin, curls, and ears remind JJ of Dean. "A little, you have his chin and curls. His hair used to get so wavy, especially after it was wet." She commented with the slight hint of a smile. "From the beach, because we used to spend so much time there swimming."
"Okay, sure." Charlie answered her cheeks turning a familiar red color. She tilts her head to the side wearing the signature Jareau raised eyebrow. "So does your husband know about me?"
"Will, yes he knows I had a child that died fourteen years ago yes. He doesn't know that child is you or that you didn't die. I have to figure out how to tell him though." JJ mused aloud, she doesn't even understand this dilemma herself, explaining it to someone else is going to give her a headache. "My boys don't know I had another baby fourteen years ago, so I'll have to tell them too." She added as they turn onto Ben's street. "I also have to figure out how to tell the rest of my team and my family and go to family court to–"
Charlie interrupted. "You can't take me."
"What? Charlie, you're my daughter." JJ's response is a step above conversational nearing maternal, but not quite there yet. She pulls up beside Ben's mailbox causing Charlie to attempt to make a break for it. "Uh-uh, we're going to talk about this." Charlie slumps in her seat. She can't explain why without revealing how bad Alma has gotten as of the last few weeks. JJ adjusts her seat-belt. "Would it really be so terrible to live with me?"
"No…I don't know." The girl shrugs; this is all happening so fast. It feels like she went from thinking she was going to get emancipated to now being demoted to a child, something she hasn't felt like she was in a long time. "I just can't right now, Jennifer."
JJ asked, more like demanded. "Why?"
"I can't tell you!" Charlie exasperated loudly. Tears prick the walls of her eyes as she glances over at JJ pleading with her to understand. The mother recoils at the broken look. "Please, just…I can't ma'am. I just can't."
"Okay," the profiler squints understanding something else, something bigger is going on, she takes the child locks off with mild reluctance. "Okay, Charlotte, we don't have to talk about it now." The girl nods relieved, however it's short-lived because JJ adds. "But, we are going to talk about it in the future. Right now, you're too tired, hungry, and upset to think straight and so am I so tomorrow we're going to have a real talk about what's going on because I know something is."
Charlie squints trying to hide her emotions. "How do you know that?"
"Call it mother's intuition and it's also my job to study people. I spend a lot of my day looking at how people think and right now, sweets," she reaches over to brush a loose auburn curl behind the girl's ear, "you don't have on much of a poker face. Get some rest, I'll see you later."
JJ barely has enough time to lock the door behind her before Michael and Henry race over to her. She gives them both big hugs and kisses, before setting Henry up with Toy Story. She and Will made a pact last week to wean him from the movie and screens in general, but right now she needs a second to get her husband up to speed. Lugging Michael onto her hip, JJ goes into the kitchen to talk to the man of the hour. He happens to be wiping down the kitchen table.
"So it's a girl?" Will smirked as JJ adjusts Michael higher onto her hip.
"Did Garcia tell you everything?"
"Kinda, she emailed me articles on Dr. Willis and strongly hinted he did it to you too." He explained watching as his wife nods looking slightly grateful for that news. He reckons JJ was struggling with just how she was going to be able to tell him. "So that little girl that came by the house, she's your little girl? I'm so sorry, Cher, I know yah must not be thinkin' straight right now."
Michael squirms, slightly bored by this conversation. His ears perk up at the sound of a familiar song being played and he wriggles to get down. JJ obliges, kissing the top of his head and watching as he toddles off to watch the movie with his brother. The mother finally let's herself be upset. "Yeah and she won't even talk to me. There's something going on with her and my own kid won't tell me. She needs me, but she won't let me be there."
"Wonder where she gets that from," the Metro cop retorted earning a withering glare. He holds up his hands. "Sorry Cherie, just sounds like someone else I know." JJ sits down at a stool to put her face in her hands, oddly enough, the cool island countertop feels good on her forehead right now.
"She hates me."
"Did she say that?"
JJ shakes her head, suddenly feeling dramatic. "No, she said she hadn't had a mother in a long time and she didn't need one now."
"Well, she ain't wrong. She hadn't had a momma in a long time." The man plays both sides of the goalpost. He can see where both ladies are coming from and in his life, Will's learned in order to stay safe; he should always be Switzerland when it comes to women fighting. He offers his wife a warm look. "She's a confused kid Cher, and hurtin' like no kid should, but she don't hate you." Will promised leaning against the counter to study his wife's face. He can see an array of emotions reflecting off one another sadness, grief, worry, exhaustion, there's a lot going on there right now.
"She came here to get emancipated." JJ reiterated in exasperation. "A signature is all she wanted from me. Can you believe it?"
The man shakes his head in disbelief. "Considering she looks about Jack's age, I can't." That pint-sized carrot top still looks young enough to get a kid menu. He sucks in his cheeks. "To be fair, Cherie, it makes sense, she's been on her own for as long as she can remember, wanting to get emancipated makes sense. – at least in her mind. I'm sure you can see where she's comin' from, can't yah?"
"Yes, I can, but I just…this whole thing is such a mess." JJ collapses onto the counter wearily and also hungrily too, she hasn't eaten since breakfast. "How could I not know? Why wasn't I informed when Dr. Willis got put away or even charged? I feel like I should've been notified."
"You're right, lookit, we'll figure this all out later okay?" Will promised as he gives her hand a squeeze. He stands up straight and goes over to the fridge to take the pizza out. "The natives got restless aboutan hour ago, so we ordered Antonio's. I reckon it's still kinda warm, but if yah want me to heat it up for yah just lemme know."
JJ smiles at her husband gratefully. "No, this is great." She takes a slice out, "amazing actually. I've been starving all day and this is just Heaven." The woman nearly devours the pizza in four hasty bites. She studies Will, how she got a man this amazing, she'll never know. "Are you sure you're okay with this? I mean, how come you aren't freaking out? I kind of expected you to be more freaked out."
"Oh trust me, darlin' I am, it's all on the inside." Will flashes her a grin. He props himself up against the kitchen island once again. From this vantage point, he can hear the TV and more importantly, his sons, Henry is likely watching Toy Story again and Michael is bopping around. He'll need a bath soon though. "But that little girl is family and it don't matter where family comes from, once you find em' yah hold on tight. I know she ain't mine, but that little girl is my family." A sudden thought occurs to him and he chuckles. "Yah know, I'm kinda surprised yah didn't drag her here."
"Kidnapping is illegal, Will, and she wouldn't have agreed."
"Ah, there it is." He points with a bemused expression.
"What's that look for?" JJ accused almost daring him to disagree. He's definitely got on a look, similar to the one, Penelope wore when Charlie got a little too sassy earlier.
"Nothin," the brown haired man shrugs before getting daggers thrown his way and relents. "I'm just thinkin' about how crazy she's driving you from afar, can't imagine what she'll do when we're all together." For his trouble and comment, JJ throws a pepperoni at him. "Ooh I like it when yah get feisty." He teased as his gaze wanders towards the living room. "How do you think we should tell Henry? The girl is his sister, he's got a right to know and come to terms with a new kid on the block. He ain't little like Michael."
The blonde takes another slice out of the box. "Oh, I don't know, but the sooner we confront this as a family the better. I've sworn Garcia to secrecy so everyone will probably know by Monday which is a good thing ause I don't even know how I'd explain this to everyone." She responded lightheartedly, Penelope is notorious for not being able to keep a secret which this time, could work in their favor. "No one, except you, Danny, Tess, and my parents knew about her." Just like that, a newfound sense of grief envelops JJ as she comes to realize her little girl has gone through life without anyone looking out for her.
"Everything's gonna be all right. Things ain't gonna be perfect, but we got this." Will comes over, wrapping his arms around her in an attempt to take some of her grief. JJ looks up at him with warmth in her eyes as she wraps her arms around his neck kissing him. By the time they pull apart, Will's tasting pizza and has to catch his breath before he speaks again. He takes a sip of her water. "What was that for?"
"For everything," JJ decided taking his hand in hers.
"That's a lot to put into one kiss." Will chuckled as his wife smirks devilishly. Using his leg, he drags her stool closer to him to land another one and then they hear a crash. They groan as their moment has been ruined, no doubt. "I guess that's my cue, huh?"
JJ snags a third slice of pizza before shaking her head. "Uh-uh, you've been on kid duty all week, relax. I'll deal with this." She stands to go investigate what the hell just broke.
Charlie watches as JJ sits in her car for a minute before seeing resigned defeat slouch the woman's silhouette and she reluctantly drives away. The fourteen year old half thought Jennifer was going to come barreling after her when she leapt out of the car and dashed into Ben's house. She sighs tiredly as her best friend plops down on the couch with two bowls of ice cream. Ben's caramel tinted brown skin has a slight pink hew to it from his time at the beach yesterday.
"Your mom's in town." Charlie remarked thoughtfully mid-chew through some lo mein. She'd recognize Anna Ellis's beat up old station wagon anyway.
"Yeah, we went to the beach." Ben shrugged. Every so often, his mother blows into town and takes him on a day trip. He used to enjoy them more when he was little, but as he's gotten older, he recognizes them for what they really are; an attempt to make his momma feel better about herself. But, the boy tries to have a good time even still. "Who was that who drove you here?" He asked the big brother coming out in him as it often does whenever Charlie's around.
The girl takes a long sip of her chocolate milk. "My birth mother, Jennifer, I tried to get her to sign the emancipation form."
"Yeah I kinda seriously doubt Tanya's gonna just let you emancipate yourself." The nearly fifteen year old still can't believe Charlie's gotten this far without Tanya knowing. He gets why she wants to do it to help Alma not get in trouble and usually Tanya is usually more on her game when it comes to stunts like this. He guesses since all four of her kids are sick that things, like Charlie's latest escapade, has fallen under the radar. "You know I ain't wrong." He opens up a box of double-stuffed Oreos. "So your real mom wants you then?" Charlie nods as her former foster brother studies her seriously. "Is she nice? Like do you think she's okay?"
"She's nice, kinda weird like she wouldn't let me go inside until I talked to her about why I couldn't live with her, like she was worried or something. It was weird." Charlie said with a confused shrug. Ben stares up at the ceiling praying for patience as well as a new pair of shoes when his mother and aunt return home from their shopping trip. A part of him understands Charlie's wonder since she's never been someplace where she was expected to talk things out. "I didn't tell her cause then she'd probably tell Tanya, but I can't live with her…Alma needs me."
Ben decides right then and there that Charlie's real mom is a decent person. If she has his surrogate sister worried that she'll protect her, even though Charlie wouldn't see it that way, then Ben thinks this Jennifer lady ain't too bad. "Want to know what I think?" The former foster siblings have a pact that involves never lying to one another.
"No but you're gonna tell me so…" Charlie trailed off, rolling her eyes.
"I think you're scared. I think you're worried about what'll happen if you move in with your real mom and you like her and her family too. I think you're so scared about losing people that you think not even trying is the best thing to do, but it won't. You telling her to 'fuck off' is weak, Chuck, and you know it." Ben said keeping his gaze locked on hers. He's partially projecting because his Aunt Jules told him last week that she's moving to Paris with her girlfriend, Colette, so he's going to live with his dad, Jack Hodgins, now – a man he's never met. Ben thinks that's why Jules called Anna, to tell her in person and/or see if she wants to take him.
"What about you?" The girl feels herself getting worked up. Today has been a day and she's not in the mood to fight, but since Ben is throwing stones; she might as well pick up a few too.
Ben asked. "What about me?"
"You let everyone decide things for you." She answered with just as much matter-of-fact. "Like, your mom and Jules, they've decided you're going to live with your dad even though you've never met the guy and don't even know what kinda person he is." Although, Charlie doubts Jules would go anywhere without having the guy properly vetted. Jules Ellis has been more of a parent to Ben than his own mother and she's only thirteen year older than him. The only reason she didn't take Ben from the get-go was because when he first entered the system at eight, she was still in college barely able to support herself. When she did have an adequate income, one year later, she got Ben the first chance she had. But, Charlie's in a fighting mood and doesn't want to admit he's right and vice-versa. "You just agree with whatever people want so you don't hurt anyone's feelings. That's weak too."
The boy's face twists into one of hot aggravation. "Where else am I supposed to go, Chuck? Foster care? I'm sure lots of fosters are just praying to get a gay teenager." Ben has known for as long as he can remember that he likes boys. However, through the advice of Bug, he kept that quiet until moving in with Jules at nine when he told her. She laughed saying it must run in the genes. "I don't have any other choice, it's not like Anna's gonna suddenly wanna be my mom." His grayish green eyes become pointed as Charlie looks down feeling guilty. "She's fucked up, you know that and so does everyone else…do you think I want this? To move in with some guy I don't even fucking know, well I don't."
"Why can't you just tell Jules that?"
"Because, she's given up everything for me, Chuck and I love her." Ben's voice takes on a somber less frustrated note. He closes his eyes for a second. "She's had her life on pause for me for like six years…I want her to press play again, and shit yeah I'll miss her, but I love her too much to ask her to give up another five years."
Charlie puts down the fork. "I'm sorry." She whispered quietly. "I didn't mean what I said before. I don't think you're weak Benny."
"I don't think you are either." The half-black teenager flashes back to when he'd sneak Charlie food after she got in trouble. Charlie had, still has, a big mouth. Whenever something sounded off at Sunday School, she'd say so which resulted in Charlie not getting dinner as punishment because Linda, despite being a church fanatic, never so much as raised a hand to them. She preferred to leave that to Rick, but since Charlie was too quick for him and he was lazy; Linda resorted to sending them to bed without dinner. It very rarely worked because more often than not, one or all of them would sneak each other food. Ben smiles at the strange, fucked up memory. "You know you're gonna be okay right? If you move in with your real mom, you'll be okay."
"It's not me I'm worried about. If I leave, who'll take care of Alma?" The girl rambled, Ben starts cleaning up the boxes of Chinese food. "And what happens if I move in with Jennifer and don't like it?" He puts their plates in the sink letting Charlie babble. Much like when they were kids, every time Charlie babbled the real cause as to why she was so upset usually came at the end. "Or what if she doesn't like me? What happens them?" Her voice gets quiet as the truth to it all comes to light.
Ben gives her a look. "With that Shirley Temple face, doubtful," he teased causing Charlie to look away still wearing her anxiously defeated pout. "Hey," the surrogate brother nudges her. "That won't happen." He vowed sending positive thoughts into the future. Charlie nods, not quite believing him, but feeling done talking about such intense topics for one day. Ben bites his lips before adding just as seriously. "If by some insane chance that does happen then you can move in with me and I'll hide you in my closet. Ooh that's kinda funny the gay guy hiding a girl in his closet. Talk about irony. I should write a play on it." She tries not to smile at his joke.
"You're such a dork."