Thanks for the reviews and your patience. I appreciate it. College has been an interesting time right now and I also have to help my siblings because two (my fifteen year old brother and twelve year old stepsister) are doing hybrid school and two (my nine year old stepbrother and five year old half-brother) are doing remote. So, my dad and stepmom have their hands full. Also, my mom and stepdad have decided to send their kids (my eight year old step-brother and three year old half-sister) to school/daycare every day which has caused drama with my brother who just graduated college and lives there to save money works remotely. (Yes, I come from a blended family – also have an older sister in her late-twenties who lives down South with a family of her own).

Hope everyone else has less drama in their lives with their families, but right now, mine is a little hectic with all of the 'adults' trying to figure out what to do. I'd love to hear what you guys have planned for yourself if you're in school like me or your kids if you have any.

This is also the last chapter before season 12 begins. Also I promise to have quicker updates with school being solely online now it should be easier for me to upload.

Chapter 8- What Can I Say

"So, what's the plan here? I mean the truth ain't exactly pretty."

"Neither is a lie. We promised not to lie to her about the outcome, no matter what." JJ unbuckles her seat-belt all while knowing deep down they can't lie to her. Charlie's fourteen, young but not little enough where they can sugarcoat this. She's also perceptive and can cut through bullshit faster than any farmer JJ's ever known. "I don't like this either, Will, but lying to her…" she pauses to find the right words, "Charlie trusts us." From what Tanya's disclosed to them, trust and Charlie don't come very easily. "If we lie to her, she'll shut us out." JJ unconsciously profiles her kids; it's a habit of the trade but comes in handy, like when Henry fibs about homework and in trying to understand Charlie. She stares up the driveway halfway wishing they could lie to the fourteen year old. "Look, we don't have to tell her the details; we can just say Dean isn't interested in a relationship."

Will's expression is thoughtful. It sounds like they're offering someone else a job or like they're on some dating site and has decided not to go on a second date. He rubs his brow wearily. "Let's get this over with." The couple leaves their suitcases in the car opting to grab them later and heads up the front steps. With his hand around the doorknob, Will takes a deep breath, bracing himself for whatever emotions Charlie may feel.

Henry sees them first. He runs over to the door. "Momma, daddy, you're home!" His excitement is contagious and soon JJ finds herself grinning down at him. There will be a day when their biggest boy won't scamper over to them like this; he's already starting to get to the state of feeling embarrassed when they're in public. Hell, his cheeks turn pink whenever she sings in the car and that's when they're alone. Then again, Charlie gets embarrassed about the same thing too.

"How were they?" JJ asked as Garcia bounces over to them with Michael on her hip. The one year old makes grabby hands for his mother, kicking his legs in anticipation.

Penelope passes the toddler over. "Amazing little angels as always," she coos at the sight of Michael cuddling into his mother and resting his head on her shoulder.

"I'm sure," the blonde profiler chuckled. "And why is my baby covered in syrup?" She cringes as she runs her hand through his baby hair and feels a clump of stickiness. Neither she nor Will is very keen on their children's first haircut; they both like to wait as long as they can but it's looking like Mikey will need one soon. They also rarely feed their kids sugar, but it's an unspoken rule that their kids are allowed to have as much as they want whenever their relatives are in charge.

Henry supplied. "We had pancakes for breakfast." He bounces up and down feeling jittery while his father watches him with mildly amused eyes. "Auntie Pen let us pour the syrup. I made a Pompeii pancake volcano and the syrup was the lava and the chocolate chips and blueberries were the town people." The eight year old pushes his glasses closer to his eyes as they slip down his face. "Did you know Pompeii was a real place?"

"It still is, Henry, it's now an archaeological site in Italy's southern area." Spencer added, stepping into the living room from the kitchen. He just finished with the dishes and cleaning up the majority of the kitchen but Mount Pancake Vesuvius was a feat in itself.

"Yeah and Mount Veliseraptor killed lots of people." Henry informed them seriously.

From the couch, Charlie shakes her head. She called, "Mount Vesuvius." JJ nods vaguely with a squint as she focuses on the teenager; she has hesitation in her eyes. The profiler sighs, she wishes her daughter felt comfortable enough to greet them at the door, but she likely still feels unsure of her place in the family. Just the thought of that crushes JJ; she does notice Charlie move slightly as though she's itching to stand but holds herself back.

"That's what I meant." The younger brother answered in a huff. A brief flicker of annoyance forms across his face at his big sister's correction. Will opens his mouth to inquire further, but Henry cuts him off. "Can Uncle Spencer and Auntie Penelope make breakfast every day?"

"You don't like my pancakes Bubba?" Will tries to hide his hurt. He's well-known in the family for making the best pancakes and it kind of stings that his son prefers someone else's.

The third grader responded. "Yours are real good, but we made a volcano daddy. We should make a volcano sometime too. Ooh can we make a pasta volcano? We can use lots of sauce, you make the best sauce daddy." And just like that, Will is his son's hero again or at least it feels that way. "Daddy guess what? Uncle Spencer helped me make an ocean in a water bottle. I put glitter in it to make it shiny. I'm gonna show you!" With that, Henry races upstairs stumbling halfway up but managing to catch himself and continue on his trek.

About two seconds after the little boy is securely upstairs, JJ turns accusing eyes onto the bemused albeit blushing pair. "Why am I not surprised he's hyper at eleven in the morning?"

"There have been multiple studies that show sugar doesn't result in hyperactivity, but the idea that it does may subconsciously result in someone to behave as such." Reid supplied as Penelope nods pointing at Spencer in agreement. "His excitement may also be linked to the fact that you two are home and he can't wait to show you all the interesting things we did this weekend."

Garcia's head bobs up and down as she shrugs impulsively. "Also, I can't help spoiling them, they're too adorable. This is your fault." She points to an incredulous Will and an amused JJ. "You should've made uglier looking kids."

"Of course it is," the mother rolls her eyes with a lighthearted laugh. Charlie watches the exchange from her seat on the couch looking equal parts entertained and pensive. JJ gives Penelope a quick hug before handing their youngest to Will and going over to the teen. Penelope, sensing they want a moment alone, begins to go upstairs only to pause to watch the mother-daughter interaction. "Hi sweets, your hair looks pretty." She touches the purple wave with such gentleness that Penelope coos outright. Charlie leans into the touch which causes the techie to coo at the adorable scene and also causes the girl's cheeks to flame up.

"Thanks, Auntie Pen got them at Claire's." Charlie lets her mother to keep her hand there a second before turning her face towards the blonde. "She did some make-up on me too." Garcia catches JJ's eye as well as the unspoken hint and wanders up the staircase.

If JJ is surprised by Charlie's sudden use of 'Auntie Pen' she doesn't show it. Instead, she grins at her teenager and pushes back the wild strawberry mixed with a few purple streaks. JJ could tell the minute she caught a second glance at her kid that she was wearing make-up. It doesn't exactly suit her babyish features, but she still looks beautiful. Her eyebrows knit together. "I can see that."

"Yeah, she says evergreen and bronze are some of my eye shadow colors." The teenager chews on her lower lip not quite sure if her mother is upset or not.

"Huh, well I like your eyes how they are." The mother begins to wipe some of the excess make-up off with the pad of her thumb. She doesn't mind if Charlotte wears a little make-up, but she has a lot caked on, more than Garcia should've allowed but the techie does struggle to be stern with kids.

Charlie's face turns into one of disgust. "Ugh JJ, that's your spit." Penelope smiles recalling a time when her own mother did that to her and she make a similar face about it.

JJ ignores the aggravated huff and continues wiping it off. "I just want to see my kid's naturally pretty face. Oh there it is, so pretty." She feels her daughter's cheeks heat up. "You're old enough that you can wear some make-up sweets, but not a lot okay?" JJ personally isn't ready to see her daughter in tons of make-up and knows Will feels the same, but most teenagers like to experiment with it.

"Yeah whatever," Charlie shrugs not quite used to the attention. She let's JJ continue dabbing her face with a now wet napkin. Luckily though, her mother dipped it in water rather than spit. Tilting her head to the side with a suspicious squint, the teenager asks outright. "Why're you're being so nice?"

"Excuse me, young lady I'm always nice." JJ squints at the girl's words looking annoyed at the notion that she isn't a nice person. Charlie's eyebrows shoot up doubtfully and she squints causing Will to chuckle, that's such a Jennifer Jareau face. "I'm always nice." The mother reiterated with her arms crossed. "Don't give me that face, I am."

"JJ, I was in foster care, I know when a grown-up is trying to make things seem okay." The mother sighs wondering not for the first time, if her kid learned to read people as a means of survival. She sits down beside her so they're making eye contact. JJ's found speaking to her kids on their own level helps when delivering bad news.

The stepfather turns to their friends who are standing at the foot of the staircase. He licks his lips tensely. "Could ya'll give us a minute?" Will asked as he readjusts Michael in his arms. Their son is going through a clingy phase at the moment so he's not likely going to go back to Penelope quietly. Sighing heavily, he glances at the baby who pats his father's chest and then giggles hysterically. "Hey little man, where's Bubba?" Michael looks around suddenly worried about the bigger boy. "Can you go find him for him?" The little boy wriggles to get down and climbs the staircase to set about finding his Henry. Penelope and Spencer follow after the toddler who seems intent on locating the eight year old.

Charlie meanwhile makes a face. "Oh crap, am I in trouble? I haven't done anything." At least the teen doesn't think she's done anything and she wracks her brain to think so.

"No, why would you think you're in trouble?" JJ squints at her in mild confusion.

"Cause you guys wanna talk to me alone." The strawberry blonde stated sounding thoroughly exasperated at this conversation. Her thoughts are going a mile a minute. Due to Uncle Spencer's statement, Charlie now knows having a sugar rush isn't a thing, but she still feels bouncy. There's a lingering question she wants to ask her parents except she's slightly anxious about the answer. "Parents only do that when kids are in trouble."

Will's tone is soft. "You aren't in trouble, Trouble."

"Oh," the dots seem to connect in Charlie's head and her final guess is the right one. "He doesn't wanna meet me, does he?"

Taking a disheartened breath, JJ shakes her head. "No, baby he doesn't. He isn't ready to right now." She gauges her daughter's face trying to scrutinize her every detail. It really is harder to read Charlie especially because she has her hair in her eyes and is looking down. Gently guiding the girl's chin up, JJ tucks any stray red curls behind her ears. "Look, it has nothing to do with you and everything to do with him? It's his loss."

"Your momma's right." The stepparent reaffirmed causing Charlie's gaze to fall on him. "Lookit as long as the sky's blue, you have people in your life that care about you. You're not alone." He sits down on the coffee table.

"Are you okay, sweets?"

Charlie blinks and sits up a little straighter. "Yeah sure I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?" She doesn't want to express how she feels right now. It sucks cause she knows the Jareau-LaMontange team probably want her to, but Charlie doesn't want to. She didn't think she'd be hurt by Dean's rejection, but a part of her is, a larger part than she thought too. The teen usually takes on a more realistic approach to things; it helps in protecting herself. But, this still stings. Charlie thought she wouldn't care if he didn't want her, but she does and that frustrates her. A series of emotions dances across her face leaving both parents unsure about what's going on with the girl.

JJ gives her a look. "Can you talk me through what's going on in your head?"

"I'm fine I don't even know the guy." She shrugs trying to push away her feelings of anger. "Why should I care if he doesn't want me? This isn't some Disney movie, if he doesn't wanna know me; it's no biggie. What do I care anyway?" Charlie leaps up from the couch and attempts to walk off.

"It's okay to be hurt, Trouble. Oh no, don't take off on us yet." The father answered only to wrap a hand around Charlie's, not firmly but strong enough to hold her in place and not let the girl scamper off. "C'mon let's sit down a minute and breathe. You don't gotta say nothing and I promise yah neither of us are gonna say boo either, but we're all just gonna sit and take this in."

Charlie whined tearfully. "I don't want to do this."

"I know yah don't, but it's important for you to let yourself feel this. Bottling whatever you're feeling up will only make it hurt worse when you finally uncap it."

The mom exchanges a meaningful glance with her husband. There's been a time when he's said similar sentiments to her. JJ takes Charlie's other hand, giving it a comforting squeeze. "Sweets, you can feel whatever you want or nothing at all; it's okay."

The teenager nods resolutely. Charlie declared. "Nothing at all, I choose that one." She wriggles out of their grasp, scampers into the kitchen, and out the back door. JJ and Will sigh, knowing they should go after her but also knowing Charlie needs a minute to let off some steam.

Being part of the Adkins family carries weight; the name alone holds enough clout to cause well-known legislators to quiver in their boots, even still. With the name comes a sense of respect, an older kind of esteem that was had once been regarded as near royalty…at least in the Midwest to Southern regions. Up North is anyone's ballgame, but then again, Northerners are a bit backwards.

Dean was raised to value his family name, to know and acknowledge the weight it wields. Long ago before he tied his first tie, Dean toyed with the concept of being a mechanic. Growing up, he loved spending time with his Uncle Pete; working on whatever vehicle the latter found on the side of the road. Pete was his father's much younger brother and because he owned a garage, had been considered the black sheep of the family. Of course, Dean often recalls his father, Maxwell Adkins, acting more paternal towards his brother than anything else. As it was, Maxwell had to take on a more fatherly role towards his little brother following the death of their father, Neal, when Max was near eighteen and Pete was just eight.

His thoughts shift to the present. Dean's eyes wanders over to the framed photos of his family, forced grins on school pictures and a stoic smile from his wife now meet his somber gaze. Scrubbing a hand over his face, Dean leans back in his chair; it never used to be this hard, life that is. He closes his eyes briefly before opening them to find his children, Olivia and Evan, staring back at him. The guilt gnaws at his core, by refusing to acknowledge his daughter with JJ; he's essentially turning his back on everything the Adkins family stands for.

Due to the current state of the world, Dean fishes around his desk, in search of the burner cell phone his mother gave him for emergencies. Picking up the scrap piece of paper the family body guard, Gerard, left, Dean takes a deep breath before dialing the unfamiliar number. "J…Jennifer," he amends softly. "I-I know you…I'm probably the last person you want to hear from right now, but shit I was never good at this, admitting when I was…look if the offer is still good; I-I'd like to meet her, my ah our daughter. Please call me back." He pinches the bridge of his nose as he hangs up only to jump, startled, as a voice crackles around his study.

"Your what?" His sister demanded.

"I believe dear," another voice, as thick as velvet and as strong as an ox remarks tersely, "your brother is speaking about his lovechild with Jennifer Jareau." The Adkins matriarch, Nancy's declaration hangs heavily in the air like a foul smell soaking up the goodness and leaving behind a sense of putrid waste. Neither adult child notices their mother shutting the door behind her which propels a bemused Donna to stumble deeper inside.

Charlie has wandered into the woods. Usually, the fourteen year old prefers hiding in closets but right now she doesn't want to be found. That only began after she watched Narnia as a kid…the idea of escaping to a secret world enticed her. Bug and Tasha would often find her in one, especially after a fight with Mr. Rick. He could never find her, then again he was a lazy guy and Charlie secretly enjoyed being able to be invisible. Gently running her fingers over the dirt, Charlie feels tears form against the walls of her eyes. Not being wanted isn't a completely foreign area for the teenager, but living with JJ has allowed Charlie to feel like anything is possible.

"Your parents are looking for you."

Charlie jumps, startled at the sound of a voice. She scowls up at the perpetrator being none other than her uncle. "Yeah well, tell them you didn't find me."

He offers her a sympathetic smile. "I think you know I can't do that." Based on his limited experience with kids, Reid has learned that leaving them alone isn't the brightest decision. He examines the girl who has become a surrogate niece to him. "I believe they want to make sure you're okay."

"But I'm not okay. I'm not okay and I know they want me to be normal but I don't know how." The girl explained with her voice trembling and her fingers shaking.

Spencer's gaze becomes sympathetic. He knows his friends worry about Charlie and sometimes their desire for her to feel welcome may come across as overly concerned. Growing up with a parent who chose to not be part of raising you is a difficult pill to swallow; it's taken Reid years to come to terms with that. "It's okay to not be normal, I'm not normal." He stated as Charlie wrinkles her brow at him in an amused way that Reid swears JJ has done before. The genius chuckles, he'll have to read up on genetics again because some of Charlotte's expressions are uncanny. "Being normal isn't even a real concept because the idea of normalcy is constantly evolving. It was once common practice to drill a hole in a person's head to release their demons and cure them from illness."

"That's messed up." Charlie tilts her head to the side studying her surrogate uncle, wanting a distraction from the harsh realities that just so happen to be her life. "Do you know other cool stuff like that?"

Dean is the first to get his jaw off the floor and regain some composure. "You knew?"

Nancy rolls her eyes. Her children clearly think she's either stupid or incompetent. "Of course I knew I'm your mother." She shakes her head as Dean works his way around the room in an attempt to calm himself down. He used to behave similarly as a boy, whenever he got worked up he'd walk around the room until he either calmed himself down or wore himself out. "I learned that Jareau girl was pregnant and knew it was yours because even she couldn't work that fast."

"How did you find out?"

"You children like to think just because I was married to the great Maxwell Adkins that all I'm good for is organizing parties, but who do you think crafted his empire? He was just the face, dears, I was the brains." Nancy commented dryly and sounding slightly annoyed. In his prime, Max had an incredible mind, but after Daphne…something broke inside of him that never quite got repaired. People often regard that his untimely death just two years later was from a broken heart, which isn't quite wrong given his medical history with hypertrophic cardiomyopathy. "Your father as magnificent as he was, only thought with one brain and it wasn't the one in his head."

"Mother, please." Dean objected holding out a hand. He eyes the woman he admired and feared growing up; there is still some leftover terror from his youth. Hell, in his twenties he was desperate to seek her approval especially after his father passed. He takes a deep controlling breath. "You knew JJ had a baby and didn't tell me?"

Something flickers across Nancy's eyes so fast that Dean misses it; however, his older, often mistakenly regarded as not being as intelligent sister, catches it. "The baby died during delivery, Dean, there was no point." His mother's answer earns a bemused look from her daughter and a look of outrage from her son.

Dean insisted. "But, she didn't die. My little girl survived!"

Nancy doesn't react; instead she casts her eyes towards the door and then turns to her middle child with a stern, admonishing glare. "You must calm yourself, Dean; this is no way an Adkins should behave." She scolded in that severe way she does when one of her children behaves in an uncouth way. During the summer of 2001 and well into the winter of that year as well, Nancy adopted that tone whenever Dean was concerned. Schooling her features, the mother studies her son curiously. "Where is the child now?"

"She's in JJ's custody." The brown haired man assured her, although not for the reason his mother is thinking and she knows that. Donna watches her fuming brother, Dean values his kids above all else. They are his true joys in life because Heaven knows he detests politics much in the way she tolerates these ridiculous family dinners they have once a month. Dean's forest green eyes flash. "Don't worry mother, JJ never wrote the father's name on the birth certificate and the way I treated her the other day; I doubt she'll let Charlotte near me."

Donna makes a mental note of the name, Charlotte. That's pretty enough. She and her husband, Grant, briefly had the name on their list until they stumbled across Scarlett. Nevertheless, the surgeon decides to keep the name Charlotte…most likely Charlotte Jareau in mind as she plans on looking in on her newfound niece.

"Very well," Nancy nods satisfied. If there was one thing Jennifer Jareau was good for, it was being stubborn which was proven in spades throughout her entire pregnancy. The young woman never once reached out for financial assistance from them despite Nancy having discovered she was pregnant in the first trimester. The gray haired woman chances a glance at the clock and sighs wearily. If they stay in here any longer then her children's spouses are likely to grow curious and barge in. Nancy addresses her son first. "You should return to Lillian, Dean. This is, after all, a family party." The man studies his mother intently before nodding reluctantly and leaving. He feels more spent right now than he has the last few days.

Donna waits until her little brother has left before turning her gaze onto the Adkins matriarch. "Mother," she said tersely. "You didn't know the Jareau baby survived right?" The auburn haired woman's mouth falls open in shock and she puts her hand over her mouth to keep from gasping outright. Donna's gaze becomes forlorn and full of anguish as she shakes her head. "Tell me you didn't…please tell me you didn't."

"Someone had to ensure Dean's life was on the right path. He obviously didn't care and your father," Nancy shakes her head, "if it was up to your father; Dean would've been an auto mechanic." There's near disgust regarding the noble profession. "And you, he would've let you be a teacher. Look at you, you're a surgeon and Dean is a Congressman." The mother exasperated as she pours herself a brandy. Taking a sip, the older woman levels her eldest with a severe frown. "We wouldn't have made it this far in life without some things being sacrificed." Donna feels her face become conflicted.

"You sacrificed the life of a child." The woman remarked in a mix of shock and fear now that she thinks on it. Their mother tossed Dean's baby aside seemingly without a second thought. Donna wonders how Nancy Adkins would react if she discovered some hidden truths about her children like Chase plans on applying for AmeriCorps after he graduates from high school, Scarlett is dating a Democrat, and little Beau sometimes likes to wear dresses. "Your granddaughter," her words are full of ill-concealed disgust.

Nancy's face remains stoic as she nods. "And I have to live with that." She lifts her gaze finally digesting her child's look of disgust. "My dear you shouldn't throw stones at glass houses, especially when yours has enough cracks that a strong wind would shatter the windows."

"Or a wolf," Donna clipped harshly earning a raised eyebrow from her mother. Turning on her heels, the woman makes her way to the door, stopping with her back still turned. "I have made mistakes in my life, mother, more than I'd care to admit but I never put the life of an innocent child above my own."

"You don't know what you'd do to ensure your child has a successful future." Nancy confirmed just as evenly, letting Donna digest these words before watching her eldest walk towards the door.

"No, mother, I guess I don't." She pauses with her hand curled around the doorknob. "But if Dean ever finds out you gave up his child to save face; he'll never forgive you." It's no secret that Dean is his mother's favorite; possibly because he's her own boy, but more likely due to the fact that he resembles their grandfather. Letting that sentence take up residence in the office, Donna leaves feeling a numb ache churn in her stomach. She simply cannot let go of the fact that her mother tossed Dean's baby aside without even a glance back. The thought makes her sick because if Nancy could do that to Dean's child then…Donna shudders not wanting to finish that idea and decides instead to find her husband and feign an illness of some kind.

Nancy often wishes she could be the type of mother who was demonstrative with her love, but it wasn't how she was raised. Her parents, Deanna and Donald Watson, weren't affectionate either, in fact they were aloof. She met Maxwell at a fraternity party in her freshman year of college and his sophomore; they fell in love and married upon her graduation. Had it not been for an accidental pregnancy about a month or so after they wed, Nancy doubts she would've wanted children at all. Through Maxwell's pleas, they had Donna then Dean three years later and much to their surprise twelve years after that they had Daphne.

Over the course of her children's youths, Nancy attempted to be the ever-affectionate mother she didn't have as a tyke. However, her attempts often felt rehearsed and futile. Maxwell was better at fulfilling the role of doting and loving parent better than she, her role consisted more of the austere parent that felt more comfortable correcting than coddling. This was especially the case after Daphne passed; Maxwell blamed himself, of course. He blamed his side's poor genetics for the death of their beloved little Ducky. He fell into a darkness so deep no lifeline could pull him out. Daphne was the light of their family, the glue that humanized them all, even Nancy. Daphne's birth gave everyone a new lease on life and her demise caused the darkness to overwhelm them.

Moreover, due to Maxwell losing himself, it became up to Nancy to fake normalcy too. She had to become the quiet, oftentimes hidden face of her husband's company due to the fact that he stopped bothering to show up to meetings. She had to move on, never breathing a moment or else the grief would consume her too. From then on, Nancy did all she could to steer her other children on the right paths, doing acts like paying off cops for pulling an underage drunk Donna over and preventing Jennifer Jareau from contacting Dean.

These were things she did to ensure their futures remained intact. Sacrifices had to be made.

Nancy looks around before taking out her phone and clicking on a familiar name. "Dean is aware of Charlotte, no I don't want him to know. Yes continue setting money aside, but you'll need to be more discreet about it and change the name. Am I meant to think of everything?" It'll be the day when any man comes up with a thought of his own, Nancy thought. "Change it to…" she pauses to think for a moment, her children used to love reading Peter Pan. "The Lost Boys Foundation, yes, upon my demise or her twenty-fifth birthday she'll receive it. I have my reasons none I feel like sharing with you." She rolls her eyes at Silas's insistence and stares at the ceiling, praying for patience. "As I'm sure you have your reasons for sleeping with your secretary, how cliché, or rather I suppose it isn't quite cliché considering Eduardo is not the one your wife would first suspect." The matriarch hangs up and reaches into her purse, taking out the most recent photograph that Gerard sent her of Charlotte. Nancy bites her lip; the girl looks so like Daphne, none of her other grandchildren got the Watson red locks; the rest have brown or black hair. "May God forgive me," she finishes off the brandy before reluctantly rejoining her family.