Chapter 5
Emma and Regina sat in silence for a while before Emma sighed and stood. "I should get going and give you privacy."
Regina stood as well. "I came here to talk to you, Ems. Let me give you a ride to the B&B."
After opening the door and seeing the pouring rain, Emma gave a nod. "That would be appreciated."
"Good thing I have leather seats." Regina chuckled as the two dripped inside the car.
"I forgot how much rain you get here."
Regina gave a nod as she drove, wipers on full blast. "It can get bad, but it doesn't usually last too long." She slowed down as the rain poured harder.
"Regina, just pull over. I don't think this is safe, even if it is just a few miles away."
Regina bit at her lip and then nodded, pulling to the side of the road and turning her hazard lights on. Emma took her seatbelt off and sat back in the seat and Regina was about to do the same when there was a loud crash, and her airbag went off. The truck that hit them hadn't even seen them and when the driver got out, he was already calling 9-1-1. "I didn't see the car." He said over the rain as he looked in the driver's side window. "Ma'am? Are you okay?" He asked, knocking at the window.
Regina jumped, not sure what the hell was going on. One minute she and Emma were sitting there, and the next, her airbag was out, her body hurt like hell and Emma…Emma was… "Emma! Emma where are you?" Regina saw broken glass and one of Emma's boots but couldn't see her. After closing her eyes for a moment, she looked again and noticed the hole in her window screen. "EMMA!" Fear gripped her as she fumbled to open her door.
"Ma'am, you should stay…oh shit." The man said, finally seeing the body of the blonde on the road about ten feet in front of them. "You need to get an ambulance here now." He called before running over to the blonde.
Regina felt sick as she limped over to Emma, the rain slowing to a drizzle. "Is she breathing?" She asked the man, trying to ignore the pain in her leg.
"It's shallow, but yes." He said, holding his hand up. "They said not to move her." Finally, he looked at her and stood. "Ma'am, you need to sit. Your leg is bleeding."
"What the hell happened? I was far on the shoulder, not in the road at all with my hazards on."
"I know I…I know I should have pulled over, but I have to get the delivery made before the ferry leaves."
"Yeah? Well, there it goes! You missed it and you possibly killed my best friend! Was it worth it?" Regina knelt down by Emma. Carefully she felt for a pulse and was glad when there was one, however weak it was. "Emma, you can't leave us now. Please. Please don't leave us."
Zelena, Mal, Ruby, Granny, Graham, Kathryn and her husband were all in the waiting room at the hospital when Regina was wheeled out. "Gina." Graham said, going to her.
"I'm fine. I just needed a few stitches. I hadn't taken my seat belt off yet." Regina said and then explained what happened. "Have you heard anything about Emma?" She asked, tears in her eyes.
"Not a damn thing." Mal growled, looking towards the desk.
The woman behind it felt bad. "I'm sorry, Ma'am, but they're working on her and taking time away from her to talk to you could be bad for her."
Mal let out a breath, deflating. "I know. I'm sorry." Mal sat down, wiping her eyes. "She's all I have."
Ruby reached over and took Mal's hand, her other arm going around the older woman. "I know I haven't been around her for years, but just from her story alone, she's still the strong fighter she always was. She'll make it through this."
Regina got out of the wheelchair and sat between Mal and Zelena. "Guys, Ruby's right. Emma's a fighter."
Zelena shook her head. "She has had to fight, Regina, she's had no other choice. Now…she has a choice. She could just give up, get tired of being strong. Gods know I wouldn't blame her, but I…" She swallowed around the lump in her throat. "I don't want to lose her."
Regina sighed. "I should have kept going. I thought I was…"
"Regina, this is not your fault." Kathryn said firmly. "Look, we've talked to Thomas, and you were completely out of the road and exactly where you should have been. You had your hazard lights and regular lights on; it was not your fault."
Mal stood as a doctor came out. "I'm Mal; please tell me how Emma is."
"Is it okay to talk in front of everyone? You're her medical emergency person, so it's up to you."
"Yes." Mal said, her heart pounding. "Is she alive?"
"Yes. Come sit." Once everyone was sitting, he looked at his notes. "That is one fighter in there, I can tell you that. She will recover." The group let out a sigh of relief. "She's obviously hit her head badly and is in a medicated coma until some swelling goes down. It doesn't appear that there will be any permanent damage to her brain which is honestly amazing. She has a dislocated right shoulder, a broken left elbow and arm, so she's got a cast from her hand all the way up her arm. She had two cracked ribs that will heal, her hip was out of place, but we were able to pop that back in. The main concern is obviously the head injury, but she also has extremely deep cuts and one missed a major artery but a millimeter. Honestly, she had someone watching over her. The main parts of her recovery will be the head and the cuts. I know she's visiting, but I honestly think she'll be in here at least a week, and I want her in town at least two more weeks after that."
"That's no problem. I'm her boss and she will stay as long as you want her to." Mal said. "She…she's going to be okay?"
"Yes. Now, with the head injury, there's always a risk of temporary memory loss, but honestly I don't think that will even be an issue."
"How long will she be in the coma?" Zelena asked.
"The hope is the swelling will be down in the morning and we can bring her back to us. You can each go see her for a few minutes and then go home. Go rest and come back around nine tomorrow morning. Mal, we will contact you if anything happens throughout the night."
"Thank you." Mal stated. "What room?"
"For now, she's in room 2 and you can each go in, but one at a time because it's a small emergency room. In an hour or so, we'll get her to a real hospital room and a nurse will call you with that information."
"Thank you, Doctor Chase." Graham said, shaking his hand.
"Mal, you go first." Zelena said, wanting to go last.
One by one, they each went in to see Emma and give her their support. When Ruby was in, Granny, Mal, Zelena, and Regina were all talking. "Mal, I'm not charging you for the room after today. I don't feel right when Emma will be here, and you'll spend most of your days here."
"Actually, Mal, I was wondering if you'd want to stay at our place." Regina stated. "You'd obviously be free to come and go as you want, but then we can at least be here for you and hopefully when you get updates, you can tell us."
"Regina, I'd be calling you or Zelena as soon as I'm off the phone with the hospital anyway. But…I mean, you're closer and if you don't mind, I'd love to stay with you. Granny, your offer is amazing, but Regina's only a block away."
"I understand. Please don't forget that I'm here for all of you." The woman said as Ruby came out. Zelena was the last one and she stood. "Zelena? Take your time." Mal told her.
Zelena nodded and headed back to the room. When she saw Emma wrapped in bandages, casts, wires, tubes, she couldn't help but let out a cry. "Oh, Emma." She sniffed and sat next to her, holding her hand. "We're supposed to be having dinner right now, love." She said softly, kissing Emma's hand. "Ems, you've spent too much time in your life having to be strong and I feel bad asking you to do it once again, but please fight. Please come back to me, Ems. I'm going to be here as much as they let me, but if you wake up when I'm gone, please don't think I don't love you."
The nurse who was quietly jotting down numbers couldn't stop herself. "Zelena, we'll tell her if she wakes up." She said softly.
"Thanks." She said quietly before kissing Emma's cheek. "I love you, Ems. I never stopped and never will."
White. Ringing. Weightlessness. Those were what Emma could sense. She had been sitting back and now she had no idea where she was. Opening her eyes, she let them adjust and looked around. Nothing. Empty space. "Hello?" She asked quietly, her voice rough. "Where am I?"
"You're where you're not supposed to be yet." A voice Emma would never forget told her.
"C…Cora?" She asked, her eyes wide.
"I'm here. Emma, it's not time for you yet. You need to go back."
"How?"
"Close your eyes and go to sleep. It's going to hurt, it's not going to be easy, but you do not belong here."
"Where is here? You're dead; am I dead?"
Cora shook her head, keeping her distance. "Not yet, but the longer you stay here, the harder it will be to go back. Emma, you're in the in-between right now. Please, close your eyes and go back."
"Why?"
"Because it's not…"
"No, not that. Why did you do it, Cora? Why did you hate me so much?"
Cora looked at Emma with such sad eyes. "Because I could. Emma, you did nothing wrong; you didn't deserve what I did. I…it went way too far. I was jealous of you, Emma, just like Regina said. You worked hard and bettered yourself by yourself. Instead of taking you in and being happy for your success, I worried you'd surpass Zelena, and I wanted her to be successful. I don't know why I made it a competition, but I did and once I started, I was addicted. Emma, I didn't even think of you as a person and I'm so ashamed. It was an addiction, and you were innocent. I know that's not the answer you want, but it's all I can give." She sat by the blonde and took her hand. "Go back, fight through the pain, and survive. Be with Zelena, Emma…be happy." She cupped Emma's cheek. "I love you, sweetheart, and that never stopped. I know it sounds crazy, but it's the truth. Please, go live your life and be happy."
"I loved you, Cora. I looked at you like a mother. You…you broke me."
"I know and I'm so sorry, but Emma, I didn't break you completely. Go back, get better, and show me that you're not broken."
Emma closed her eyes, pain radiating in her head. "It hurts."
Cora wiped a tear. "I know, baby girl, but please fight through it. They're waiting for you, Emma."
"Cora, I mean my heart hurts. You hurt me so badly after a lifetime of being hurt by those meant to take care of me. Cora, I know you keep saying you're sorry and that you don't have an exact reason, but that doesn't heal the pain you've caused." She opened her teary eyes. "I have to drink just to get your voice out of my head at night. I have to drink to dull the pain that is still fucking with me. Even after therapy, even after everything, I can't not hear you saying those terrible things to me." She sniffed. "I dreamed of marrying Zelena, being your daughter in law, adopting your grandkids, being a part of a real family. You took all that from me, from us, even from yourself."
Cora sighed and sat next to Emma. "I know. Emma, I know you don't believe me, but you can't hate me more than I hate me."
"That's just it though; I don't hate you. I want to hate you. It would be so much easier if I did hate you because then I wouldn't care." She closed her eyes again. "Why are you here? You've been dead longer than me."
"Yes, but I have unfinished business, and you're not dead yet, Emma, you still have time." She cupped Emma's cheek. "I deserve where I'm going and have accepted it as my punishment, but Emma, I will not allow you to give up. You kept going all through the complete hell I put you though, do not give up now. You can do this, sweet girl, and you will do this. Go marry Zelena, adopt kids, have the family you deserve and know that you did it on your own." She wiped the blonde's tears. "If I could take it all back, I would. If I could heal your pain, I would. Emma, I can't make up for what I did and I'm so sorry for that. Please try your best to let that be enough."
Regina, Zelena, and Mal were in the room with the doctor as they tried waking Emma. Zelena held her hand, watching for any sign. "Emma, please come back to me."
"Emma, please come back to me."
Emma looked around. "Lena?"
"Go to her. Close your eyes in this world and open them in the next." Cora stated, watching as Emma's eyes flitted shut. She held her hand until her body was no longer there.
"Lena?" Emma whispered, her voice dry and cracked. "It hurts."
Zelena let out a breath and smiled. "Oh Emma. I know baby, but I'm so glad you're here."
"What is it that hurts, Miss Swan." Dr. Chase asked softly.
"Mostly my head, but also I can't move my arm."
"It's in a cast, sweetheart." Mal said gently.
"I'll adjust the pain medicine, but I think once you rest a bit, you'll feel better. You're just waking up." He looked at the rest of them. "You can all stay, but please remember, she needs rest." He looked back at Emma. "I'll come back later because you probably won't remember a word I say right now. If you need anything, use your nurse call."
Once he was gone, Emma focused more. "What day is it?"
"Monday. You were out for a bit, but they needed to make sure you were healing." Mal stated.
"Emma, I'm so sorry." Regina started, but Emma raised her good hand.
"Regina, I don't remember much, but I know this wasn't your fault. You pulled over and I took my seatbelt off. If anything, it was my fault."
"No, baby. It was the drivers fault." Zelena said and explained what happened along with Emma's injuries.
Emma listened and then sighed. "I guess we should see if we can stay at the B&B longer."
"You can, but I was hoping you'd stay with me." Regina said. "Mal already moved your stuff over."
"Emma? Don't worry about any of that right now." Zelena said, kissing her hand. "Please, just rest and recover. I was so scared I wouldn't see you again."
Emma closed her eyes as she relaxed more on the bed. "Your mom told me how to get back." She said sleepily.
The three looked at each other and then back at Emma. "Honey, my mom is dead."
"I know. She was in the in-between with me. She said she had unfinished business and kept telling me to come back, marry Zelena, adopt kids, and live the life I deserve. She also said she loves me."
Mal smiled softly. "Emma, you get some rest. We can talk later."
"Mmmkay." Emma said, already half asleep.
They were all quiet for a while when Regina sat back. "What do you guys think about that?"
"I don't know. They say things like that happen." Zelena said shrugging. "If it made her come back to me, that's all I care about."
Over the next week, Emma made progress with her recovery, wanting to get the heck out of the hospital. On Friday, she finally got to go 'home' to Regina's.
"I didn't know if you wanted your own room or to share with Zelena, so your things are in an empty guest room for now."
Emma gave a smile, her faded bruises making it a little painful. "Thank you. Once I take my pain pills, I won't even care if I sleep on the floor." She bit at her lip. "Can I have some cider?"
Regina looked at Mal who sighed. "Emma, you know you can't with your medicine." She said gently.
"I just need half a glass. Please, I'm starting to shake."
Zelena looked with concern. "You're sweating, baby, are you okay?"
"Yeah, I just need a sip. Please guys, just a sip."
"Emma, you've gone all week without drinking." Regina said and then raised a brow as Emma looked down. "Haven't you?"
Mal shook her head and reached into Emma's jacket pocket pulling out three empty mini bottles of alcohol. "Emma Swan. I cannot believe you have been drinking while on medication."
"I need it, Mal. I need it to stop the shaking, the sweating, the pain."
"No, you just think you do." Zelena stated. "I understand why, Emma, but this can't continue. When did you last have a drink?"
"I had a sip around seven this morning. It was all I had left."
"Okay, so you've gone four hours and you're already like that? Ems, that's not good." Zelena took Emma's good hand and walked to the couch, sitting with her. "I know you're going through a lot, but Emma, this is the time to stop drinking and get better."
"I'm scared." Emma said quietly. "I've used alcohol for so long and Lena, it's going to make things hurt worse. I'm shaking so bad; I can feel it all up and down my bad arm."
"Okay, I get that baby, so let's go lay down for a bit."
"Emma, did you tell the doctor about your drinking?" Mal asked.
"No."
"Then I'm calling him to see how we safely do this, because Emma, we're doing this. I have back up now, and we all love you so much."
Emma gave a nod. "Okay."
Regina sighed. "Emma, it won't work unless you actually want to do this."
"I do." Emma admitted. "I'm scared, but I do want to do this. I want to get better but…I mean, I still want to socially drink."
"Emma, let's get through detox and retouch on this, okay?"
"I understand what you're all saying, and I know I need help. It's just…you guys, my ribs hurt just from shaking and I'm starting to feel sick and if I get sick, that's going to hurt as well."
Mal came back in and hung her phone up as she sat down. "You can't detox completely right now. He said you're not physically healed enough to deal with the shaking and other things, but Emma, he only wants you to drink enough to get by and try to ween yourself off."
Emma thought a bit and shook her head. "I finally am at the point where I want and can do this."
"Yes, but we don't want to undo your other recovery." Mal said. "I want you to quit, I've been wanting you to quit, but I want you to be safe when you do." She took a breath. "So, once you're healed, I'm taking you to a rehab."
"No, Mal please. I don't want to go to rehab. I'll detox at my apartment and go to AA, but I don't want to go to rehab."
"Can I ask why not?" Zelena asked quietly.
Emma looked at her and wiped her eyes, her hands still shaking. "I don't like being sent away. Also, ever since…I know you guys think it was a dream, but ever since I talked to your mother in the in-between, the only reason I drink at all is to keep these shakes away. I don't hear her voice anymore and I really want to do this."
Zelena looked at Mal. "You know her better so I'll let you decide."
Mal sighed. "Okay, Ems. But I swear, if things go bad, I'm checking you into one. I won't 'send you away', but I will send you to get help. I love you, Emma." Mal said, taking the blonde's hand. "You are my best friend; my sister and I just want to see you happy and healthy. When you were in that accident, I was so scared to lose you and now that you survived, I just want you to be okay."
Emma hugged Mal. "I love you, Mal. I promise I can and will do this."
Regina came in with a small glass of cider. "This is it for four hours. Every four hours you can have a small drink."
"Once I'm in bed, I'll be fine." Emma said, sinking into the sofa. "I'm so sorry you guys." She said to Regina and Zelena. "I show up here and now you have to deal with all this."
"Ems stop it." Regina stated, handing her the glass. "If I could keep you here forever, I would."
"Let us help you, Emma." Zelena stated.
Emma nodded. "I will. Thank you so much." She downed the sip or two in the glass. "I promise I'm going to get through this."
"We know." Mal said with a smile as her phone went off.
Regina, Zelena, and Emma talked while Mal took the call and when she came in, she sighed. "Emma? There's a huge bail jumper just twenty minutes away. Do you mind if I go?"
"You know I don't. I'm sorry I can't help you."
"It's no problem, sweetheart. I'll probably stay in town tonight and come back here tomorrow. I have to go though, the ferry leaves soon."
"Take my car." Zelena said, handing her the keys.
"Wow, thank you so much."
That night, after Emma had another small glass of cider, she lay in bed next to Zelena. "Emma? I believe you about mom, you know."
Emma smiled softly. "I have to believe, or things go back, and I don't want that."
"I'm so glad you're here. I was so scared."
"I'm here, Lena and I'm not going anywhere." She carefully shifted to kiss Zelena.