Chapter 3

Emma knew that she was scaring the shit out of Jay, but she couldn't bring herself to say more than a few words at a time, for fear of breaking down. It had been three long days since Donaldson had unknowingly brought her world crashing down upon her. Three days of pain and imagining every worst-case scenario of how this encounter was sure to go. She would gladly go back to that cave, where she had endured the most terrifying pain of her life, rather than attend the mandatory meet and greet with their new commander tomorrow morning. Her squad mates also noticed the change in her demeanor, and while they didn't know any specifics on why their new commander had their girl all stressed out, they all decided that they didn't like the guy. It didn't matter that they had never met him. Anyone who upset their doc, who was known for liking everyone, had to be absolute trash in their book. Jay had spoken to all of them, and without giving too many details, had asked them all to keep an extra close eye on her. Specifically, making sure she was eating, and not disappearing for long periods of time by herself.

At first, Emma was pissed at Jay for bringing them into this, and for treating her like this fragile damsel in distress who needed others to take care of her. But she decided to let it go. She knew he was being overprotective because he loved her, and did not like to see her hurt, or in pain. He had done the same thing after they found her in that cave, bleeding and barely breathing. It took over a month before he would let her out of his sight, bathroom trips included, much to Emma's chagrin. She knew what she had to do. She had too many people who depended on her stability, and calm demeanor to let some guy from back when she was just a kid, cause her to lose the respect and trust she had fought so hard to earn. With a reformed iron will, she went to bed, hoping that tomorrow, she would be as tough as she was telling herself she was.

Jay tossed and turned all damn night. Between his own anxiety and Emma's loud nightmares, he felt didn't get any rest. At 4 am, Jay decided to go for a run to try and get rid of his restlessness. He almost made to wake up Emma and see if she wanted to join him but decided against it. She seemed to be dreaming about their last mission, and he couldn't stand to talk to her about that. Not this morning, when he was already feeling raw with emotion about the coming event of the morning. Jay felt terrible about how much he was mothering and hovering as of late, but he couldn't seem to help it. He knew how strong and tough she was, but he also knew that when it came to Cameron, he appeared to be the person capable of slicing through all of her defenses and striking her directly at her core. He still remembered the day that Bam Bam had entirely destroyed her. It had been a few months after Sean had left for Wasaga, and Jay and Emma were working on mending themselves, and building their friendship.

Emma was having a hard time at school since the chlamydia rumor hit. Emma never could understand why Jay had taken to fall for that one, as they had never done anything together. She supposed it was better for them to all think it was him, and not let her other activities at the ravine become common knowledge. One night as they were sitting on a picnic table at the ravine, commiserating on their situations, that Jay had the idea. Why not go surprise Sean in Wasaga. He knew Emma missed him and wanted closure after the way he had said goodbye to everyone else, and just kind of left her standing there. And Jay definitely could use some honest advice from the only real friend he ever had. As he was thinking about all of this, Jay got pulled into the memory so deeply that he felt as if he was there, reliving it once again.

*Flashback*

The ride to Wasaga was a quiet one. The pair had decided to skip school, and make the drive down. This way it wouldn't be too late when they got there, and it would give them time to get in a good visit before they had to head back home. Neither one had heard from Sean since they had left him up there, and both were anxious to see him. Emma was hoping that seeing him would help her come to terms with where her life was, and give her some perspective on what to do. Sean always had a way of making Emma feel capable of anything, and she could definitely use that kind of help right now. She was practically a pariah at school, didn't care about her grades or any of the things that she used to care about, and her home life was getting more and more hopeless by the day. It seemed that Snake's cancer wasn't as gone as they had originally hoped, and with Jack now more of a handful than ever, things were looking rough. Snake isn't responding to the chemo this time as much as they were hoping, and it seemed the side effects were hitting him even harder. He has lost a lot of weight, and was looking paler and frailer than Emma could ever remember him looking. He left his teaching position about a month ago, under the guise of wanting to spend more time at home with his small son, but Emma knew the real reason. He seems to think that he isn't going to get better this time. He has lost that spark that made him the fun and goofy guy he once was. As close as she had been getting with Jay, who she now considered to be her best friend, she didn't want to burden him with this. She remembered the toll that Snake's cancer had on her relationships the last time, and did not want to go through that again. Besides, Jay had his own stuff going on, and she didn't want to make his load any heavier. She knew him and Alex were still having problems, and while he did his best to hide it, she saw how much is was affecting him. She only prayed that seeing Sean, would somehow lighten the load, and be the solution she was looking for. Jay really wanted to just relax. While he would never admit it to anyone out loud, he really missed the relationship he had with Cameron. Jay had many acquaintances, but other than Alex, and now Emma, Sean was the only real friend he had ever had. And he could definitely use some male company. It wasn't that he was getting tired of Emma, but between her, and arguing with Alex 24/7, there was just a little too much estrogen in his life at the moment. He also needed advice on what to do about Emma. Despite his best efforts, he was really starting to care about the girl, and he was worried about the path she seemed determined to stay on.

While he found her more relaxed ways refreshing, he actually somewhat missed her save the world attitude and goody two shoes side. Jay had accepted from an early age the type of life he was sure to have, but seeing Emma follow him down that path put a lead weight in his gut. She was meant for more than trouble, partying, and more trouble. He didn't want her to completely lose her newfound wild side, he hoped to see the return of some of her more respectable qualities. Even if that meant he might lose her as a friend. Jay was hoping that Cameron would help him figure out how to get her back on that path. Cause lord knows, that girl was too damn stubborn to admit that she needed any help.

It wasn't until they were about 10 mins out, that Jay finally broke the silence. "So, " Jay started with his signature smirk on his face, " I'll consent to you getting the first hug if we can agree to keep the girly squealing and crying to a minimum." Emma met his smirk with one of her own. " Deal, as long as you keep your little bromance moments to a minimum as well," she said jokingly. As they pulled into his parent's driveway, their matching smiles grew even bigger. Neither one could anticipate precisely what this visit was to have in store.

Jay was pulled back into the present by the sound of reveille going off on the loud outdoor speakers surrounding the track. He hadn't anticipated running for as long as he did, and as soon as the last note finished, he made a mad dash back to the dorms, to get showered and check on Em. As he pushed to door to their room open, his stomach dropped at the sight of an empty room. Foregoing his much-needed shower, he made his way out, in search of the missing girl.