Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach and RWBY. Bleach is owned by Tite Kubo. RWBY is owned by Rooster Teeth and the late Monty Oum (rest in peace you saint of a man).

A question one would ask why type this up? Simple – why not?

Chapter 34: Unhappy Parties

In frustration, Yang took hold of the bars and shook them to somehow magically tear them off without consequence. The pair of guards, if some could call them that by the funny hats they wore that made them more like a light comedy duo, were undeterred. Either they were well disciplined or maybe they needed more convincing through her red eyes.

"Our orders are clear." said the left guard, "The Mistral-Atlas border is closed."

The right one spoke. "Please-"

"-have a good day."

"But-" Yang tried to say something at least.

"A good day!" the guards declared.

"What world is weirder, yours or mine?" Ichigo asked Ruby.

"At this point, I can't even be surprised." Ruby answered. When someone meets Hollows that rip apart dimensions, a universe made from a single tree, and a maniac capable of shrugging off impalation like it turns him on, rarely anything is surprising. Meeting two guards who are very eccentric is a nice dose of sanity that Ruby and Ichigo may or may have lost.

"Hey, if you don't believe that I'm friends with Ironwood," said Qrow.

"General Ironwood." corrected the guards.

"Yeah whatever." Qrow shrugged it off, "But look we have Weiss Schnee with us and were trying to get her back home safely."

The guards took long glances at themselves and switching to Weiss. The stares felt they were lasting hours with how they slowly leaned to study Weiss despite the iron bars that separated them. After the weird staring, the guards stood straight and marched to the back of the base.

"That was weird." Blake noted.

"No crap." Ruby agreed.

"Hmm..." Maria mused.

"What's wrong?" Oscar asked.

"It's just," said Maria reluctantly, "I may know the commanding officer here."

"That's good, right?" said Senna, "If she is your friend, maybe she can help us."

"Not friends." Maria said.

"Let me guess." Ichigo said, "You and this officer are enemies so to speak."

"Yep, that's it." Maria perked up. "Ah yes, I come through here once every ten years to get my eyes checked up in Atlas. You bring outside cashews on one flight and suddenly you're placed on the additional screening list for life!"

Ichigo groaned while lightly banging his forehead on the pommel of Zangetsu. "Why can't things be simple in my life?"

Ruby grinded her teeth in shared pain with Ichigo, her wolf ears twitching a storm. Of course, everything in her life being the center of all of the world's problems just has to make her life difficult on each and every step. She just wants one day from this shit.

"Now, now, let's not give up hope yet." Maria encouraged, "... Maybe she's dead."

"I will gladly make that possible if it makes everything easier." Ruby proposed, her hand resting on the handle of her zanpakuto and her fury etching a grin of Cristina's make. Suddenly, everyone had a vision of a pale, red-eyed clone of Ruby standing beside her with a grin splitting her face, only to disappear for a second.

"I'll hold you to that." said Maria.

The gates of the base snapped open and the guards stood there yet again.

"Introducing," spoke the pair of guards in sync, "Special Operative Caroline Cordovin."

Much to the praise and respect from the soldiers, their superior was none other than a dwarf of a woman with grey hair and an expression that screamed, 'I am better than you'. Ichigo was a bit surprised that the Cordovin was even shorter than Rukia. Senna was wondering just how such a small person could command those guards like pups. Cordovin and Maria stared down at each other for a few tense seconds.

"Witch." said Cordovin.

"She-Devil." Maria retorted.

"How about bitch?" Ruby added.

"Really Ruby?" Yang said.

"Sorry, couldn't help myself at the shrimp for a commander." Ruby snickered, her grin only widening at the fuming dwarf, "Tell me, is the stick through your ass taller than you?"

Cordovin chose to take a deep breath instead of snapping at the Huntress. Weiss pulled Ruby aside to her teammates clearly a very tense at Ruby's attitude.

"What are you doing?" Weiss hissed.

"Trust me, I already know this isn't going to work." Ruby said, "I just need to get her down a few pegs."

"For once, I really think this is a bad idea." said Yang.

"I said the same to the my master who taught me all I knew, and she proved me wrong." Ruby said, "If it doesn't work, I have other... fun methods to try, so enjoy the show."

"You civilians cannot comprehend the importance of our mission here in Argus." said Cordovin, "So let me say this slowly. This base, that relay tower, the very safety of Argus are all gifts from the great Kingdom of Atlas. And it is my duty to uphold them as they see fit for only I have the wit and tenacity for such a task."

"Such wit."

"Such tenacity."

"Such suck ups." Senna called, "If this is what you have for soldiers, then Argus doesn't need their so-called protection with all these clowns."

"How dare you!" Cordovin snapped, "You are just like all those Argus ingrates. This city wouldn't even be here if it weren't for the mercy of Atlesian ancestors, and we do we get in return?! The entire world is ready to put a knife to our throats."

"Maybe they should." Ichigo interrupted, accosting to Cordovin while producing a heavy Aura, "So far, these 'ingrates' as you call them have all the sense to complain about you because what I see is some bully with more power than they should throwing them around like they own them. Perhaps the city would be better without you if this is what the might of Atlas gives to people."

Cordovin's suck-ups were quivering under the oppressive aura Ichigo was producing. To the dwarf's credit, Cordovin kept her face from revealing her fear despite her cold sweating.

"You insufferable civilian." Cordovin exclaimed, "Atlas is strong. If all the kingdoms plan to make us their enemy then so be it. Atlas will prevail!"

Cordovin froze at the dark chuckle coming from Ruby. As the Huntress approached, Ruby allowed a bit of Hollow reiatsu in the air to give off dread. Her presence felt cold yet furious at the same time.

"Such arrogance." Ruby said in fake applaud, "I wonder if that's a speech they drill in your head at the academy. You claim to be the best in the world when you could do nothing at Beacon. Your so-called mighty machines fell, not by Grimm hordes or an army. All that technology was made useless by a simple Scroll and a virus not only taking them offline but turning against all the people. You want to make an enemy of everyone?"

The world stood still when not even a millisecond, Ruby was behind Cordovin and her lips were several inches away from the officer's ear. Her very presence sent horrible chill through Cordovin like she was at the mercy of the devil. She had no hold on her life, and her fate rested in Ruby's hands instead.

"Try me!" Ruby hissed.

None of the Atlesians moved as Ruby casually walked back to the party, who had bulging eyes at Ruby of her... disturbing display. The Remnanties just stared at her wiping the floor with their jaws.

"We'll think about our next course of action." said Ruby without turning around, "I suggest you... be more cooperative until then. Ja ne."

The bit with Ichigo's language was a bit of the icing on the cake. The Atlesians were left gaping like fish and still as statues. SIR followed Ruby, and the rest came reluctantly. Halfway down the water bridge Weiss scowled and accosted up to Ruby.

"What the heck were you doing, Ruby?" Weiss exclaimed, "Your... antagonizing just lost us our chance to get to Atlas. And it certainly doesn't help with the image of Faunas."

Ruby shrugged off Weiss' rant. "From the moment we got there, I knew she was never going to allow any of us to go Atlas. Heck, I believe she would've kicked anyone who was a Faunas, with or without the embargo."

"Then why were you doing - whatever you were doing?!" said Blake.

"Call it a way to be more persuasive." Ruby answered with a grin. "Maybe she'll allow us to talk tomorrow."

"Are you sure it isn't because you're a sadist?" said Yang. There was no agitation in her voice. In hindsight, Yang had a feeling Ruby had a darker side to her. How could she construct Crescent Rose without such a vivid imagination?

Ichigo spoke before Ruby could retort. "You were enjoying way too much there, Ruby. I am not going to leave you alone with Yoruichi. Ever."

"Okay." Ruby admitted with a pout, "So maybe I was just a little intense there. At least I didn't decide to blow down a tower. Or two."

"It is more believable you would just blast a crater in the middle of the base." Ren spoke.

"Traitor!" Ruby accused.

"Can't be a traitor if he's back on his team." Nora said. Unfortunately, she was right. "Besides, we got Ozpin."

RWBY, Qrow, Oscar, Ren, and the shinigami cringed at that moment.

"Uh, we'll talk about that at the house." said Senna.

There was only silence as the party returned to Saph's home. JNR, Oscar, and Qrow entered first. RWBY was soon to follow, but Ruby was stopped by Ichigo.

"Hey Ruby." said Ichigo, "When was the last time you slept?"

The odd question caught confused looks from RWBY.

"What do you mean?" said Ruby.

Ichigo narrowed his eyes. "As I recall, you were sparring with Senna all night yesterday, the same day that we arrived back. So that would mean..."

"Uh... I sleep fight?" Ruby answered sheepishly.

Ichigo sighed. "You've been awake for over 24 hours since we got here."

Ruby pouted. "I can still go on. I have tons of-"

Ruby didn't get to answer as Ichigo's tail wrapped around her figure and the group proceeded into the house. No one came to Ruby's rescue even as she protested.

"Being raised in a clinic, you learn some important stuff, especially if your dad is the doctor there." said Ichigo, carefully lowering his tail so Ruby didn't bump into the ceiling, "Like the symptoms of lack of sleep, such as irritation, hallucinations, loss of energy, etc."

"Real cute, Ichi-kun." Ruby bantered, "It was only one night, alright."

"You say that." said Ichigo, going up the stairs to one of the spare beds, "But my paranoia tells me that the last thing I want is you as cranky as I am when Goat-chin decides to attack every damn second. So sleep. Doctor's orders."

Ruby would have continued her protest if she wasn't dropped on a bed. Ichigo kept his tail wrapped around her waist while he pulled up the blankets to her neck. He pulled up a chair and took a seat next to the bed, retorting Ruby's glare with an emotionless face.

"C'mon, Ichigo." Ruby whined, "We stayed awake in Soul Society."

"Correction." Ichigo rebutted, "Half of the time we were unconscious from getting our asses kicked."

"...Fair point." Ruby admitted.

"Just relax and you'll be asleep sooner than you'll know." Ichigo said.

Ruby visibly released whatever tension she had in a long sigh. The effects were immediate; her eyelids started to droop and her movements were sluggish.

"You're annoying," said Ruby, pausing in a cute yawn, "but I still love you."

In the next ten seconds, Ruby surrendered to the bliss of sleep. Ichigo didn't realize the soft smile playing on his face, and his brown eyes were locked on peace he could only describe as overflowing off of her. Slowly, Ichigo withdrew his tail and quietly exited the room to leave the Huntress to her dreams. Dreams that he wished he could join.

His thoughts were cut off when standing right outside the door was Yang. Ichigo stiffened from the analyzing gaze of the blonde while in constant fear of those eyes flashing red. After what felt like hours, Yang smiled fondly and walked away like nothing happened at all. The hybrid let out a breath that could've been his last.

Ichigo went to his own borrowed room, and settled his mind to clear.

'Zangetsu, any word on the old man?' Ichigo asked.

'Nada.' Zangetsu answered, 'He's been here as long as I have, but he sure knows how to hide. Cristina hasn't done any luck on her side too.'

Ichigo sighed and left the connection to Zangetsu. Sometimes he wished Kisuke was here give something. Anything right now.

(Karkura Town, Kisuke's Shop)

Kisuke Urahara, former Captain of Squad 12 and Head of Research and Development, and self-titled greatest genius in all of Soul Society was having the worse day in his existence. It all started when Team SIRR completely disappeared off the grid. As in nowhere to follow. Not Soul Society, Hueco Mundo, or even his secret smut stash.

Yoruichi immediately came to him for answers where her favorite prude and her, as quote, cute Rose-chan were. Kisuke, wisely or not depending on one's perspective, chose to initially keep quiet. Unfortunately, silence didn't satisfy the Flash Goddess as her smile turned too sweet to be good and the aura that men fear pushed down upon him. He squeaked that Ruby and Ichigo turned into Vasto Lordes and as far as he knew disappeared into a Garganta with Ren and Senna. He hoped his honest answer would bring him mercy.

It did not. No sir, it did not. There was no smile and Kisuke could only fathom was pain before blacking out from head trauma. Mind you when he woke up, there was a lot of blood and last time he checked the little hand of the clock wasn't supposed to be that far across. Yoruichi demanded that he bring them back, with emphasis on "now".

Kisuke was sure nothing was worse than Yoruichi's wrath, but nooo he had to be wrong again. Before that day even ended, the Vizards were at the shop with their demands for Ruby and Ichigo's return for two reasons. One, they were Vizards and considered family, and two because Kisuke put those two up to the ordeal of becoming Vizards in the first place. He was thankful they didn't hit him, but their glares would pierce heaven and their hands were a bit itchy on the hilt of their zanpakuto. Even sweet Mashiro was giving him the cold shoulder.

In short terms, Kisuke was being carried off in a ferocious shit storm.

Currently, he was situated with a frame of a Senkaimon, this one oval in shape and made of metallic materials. Cables and wiring were littered around his feet and somehow all connecting to a pedestal at his feet where lay the bubble of Ren's spiritual energy. Under his bucket hat, his blonde hair was trapped in bandages from the beating from Yoruichi and his right leg was in a cast when moments ago it was bending the other way. Fortunately, Yoruichi managed to reign herself in and leave his trusted friends of inventing that are his arms intact.

Now this new gate that Kisuke was making was going to break a lot of the Soul King's rules, which he enjoys doing. He found out that Remnant was situated in a fluid path along the Dangai compared to Soul Society, Earth, and Hueco Mundo are in their close proximity. A gate into the Dangai itself was out of the question. Instead, Kisuke was giddy in the idea of creating a true portal that would literally rip a tear from this dimension to Remnant. The idea came from the incident from the Valley of Screams. So damn the Soul King's rules because to the semi-sane scientists this was too fun to pass up to flip off the lazy bastard and also was an added incentive to not die horribly by Yoruichi.

"C'mon, I'm so close." Kisuke mumbled as he was currently screwing something in the pedestel, "If I can just track the signal... reiryoku is still intact... give me this chance to get one up on you, Kami."

A click sounded and the machine was whirring to life. Quickly, he stationed his zanpakuto to drive in a slot of the pedestal so the blade could create a key seal of sorts used in the same way as the Senkaimon when traveling from Soul Society and back. That way, anyone with a zanpakuto could make a few slashes to travel between realms. A smirk grew to a length that would've split his face as a light grew within the oval structure. A tear in space itself opened, its sides shimmering like shattered glass. His eyes widened in joy seeing the image of an entirely new world. It was only as small as a fingernail but he could see it so clearly.

Kisuke cheered. "YE-"

Before the light collapsed and a massive shockwave blew Kisuke off his feet and skidding against the ground till face met rock. Kisuke spoke muffled curses as he forced himself up. His eyes shot up to the sky burning with rage.

"DAMN YOU!" Kisuke cursed, "THINK YOU CAN STOP ME?! BRING IT. I DON'T CARE AS LONG AS I BREAK ONE OF YOUR PRECIOUS RULES, KAMI. THE IMPOSSIBLE WILL BE POSSIBLE!"

"KISUKE!" A shrill screech stopped Kisuke from his made rant and replaced it with fear, "IF YOU'RE CHEERING, THAT MEANS IT IS FINISHED. RIGHT!?"

Sweating bullets, Kisuke managed to shout back in a whimpered tone. "Uh no - but it is a cheer of how... close we are."

There was no response. And no response meant she was either sneaking up on him to kick his ass or reluctantly accepted his excused. Frowning, Kisuke settled back at his latest and most ambitious project, resting his chin on his hand.

'I have to thank you Ren.' Kisuke thought, looking at the spiritual orb filled with green reishi, 'Because of you, I have a goal to discover an entire different universe and as well keep Yoruichi from killing me since you gave me the means to bring you guys back. Just hope no trouble comes to you or your friends on the other side.'

(Outskirts of Argus)

High in the sky, the air rippled. A tear in the very space-time opened up to a black abyss. Nothing happened after a few seconds before a foot plated in bone like a boot stepped out. Arms followed, also plated with black spiral marks on the hand and shoulder, and the elbows had a sharp jut like a horn curving back to the shoulders. His knees were capped with the same sharp appendage, but all that was left was black skin extending from the mid-thigh to the belly. The upper torso was slightly rigid in bone plates decorated with jagged black stripes. There was nothing in the sternum but a hole. Up to his face was the visage of an oni: a mouth lined with sharp teeth with four fangs protruding out, burning orange pupils peering out of eyes of a mask with gray liner, grey hair reaching below his shoulders in a mangled mess, and two horns curving from his forehead to the back of his head. On his back were four short, but noticeable spines.

This entity gave off malice and terror unlike any this world should experience. For he was a Hollow, a very ancient Hollow that has lived for over 1,500 years. Yet he has never ventured so far into the Dangai and land himself in such an unfamiliar world. His reason was on the trail of two powerful presences. They were also Hollow in nature, but the power they each gave of was grand as he could describe. He only felt such unbridled power from one being only, one he knew all too well when he was an inkling of himself. The terrifying flames that still haunt him, yet still fueled his own wrath of shinigami. Genryusai Yammamoto was his name, and his very presence irked him so much that years later he returned to his realm of heaven to kill consume a few of his precious captains just to spit him.

But these two were different, but he wouldn't run. No, he would hunt them down and consume them, thus giving him the power to not only topple Soul Society but every realm in existence. Yammamoto will fall, and his rival Barragan will beg him for mercy..

Turning away from those thoughts, the Hollow sniffed the air for that reiatsu. There wasn't a strong trail but it was still there. But two other scents put a scowl on his face. He could never forget that scent, not since he bathed and drank the very blood of it.

"Shinigami Captains." said the Hollow in a surprisingly even voice, but the hiss was still present. A smile stretched behind his mask to match the grin it displayed. He walked on the air, taking the scent of such wonderful and delicious reiatsu saturated in the air. This world was a goldmine. A whole world of humans with even higher reiatsu and there were only a few shinigami present. Not enough to defeat him, and not very difficult to dispose of quickly.

"Time to feast on shinigami once again." the Hollow hissed before disappearing in a buzz of static.

It was the warning that a Vasto Lorde has come to Remnant.

Yay, I finally got this chapter done. Yoruichi isn't happy that Kisuke lost her favorite students and is giving him the right motivation for such a task of bringing them back. Now, an unknown Vasto Lorde has entered Remnant as well, attracted by the scent of reiatsu from the Vasto Lordes of Ichigo and Ruby. Remnant, ready or not, has just gotten itself beyond in mortal affairs.

Up next is Chapter 35.

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