03 Jan 1999

Stepping out of the Floo in McGonagall's office, Hermione greeted her favourite professor and made her way back to Gryffindor tower to put her things away and get settled back into school mode. She was grateful the Ministry wasn't making university students take the train to school anymore. Even with the anxiety that had seemed to plague her over the holiday, she'd had a wonderful time. The Malfoys really were the nicest of hosts and she had been allowed to read as many books as she wanted, was never alone if she didn't want to be, and was able to soak in the large tub for hours without being interrupted. It was going to be hard to be back in a shared dorm.

Especially if she had to deal with more 'Ron and I have moved to below the shirt but above the bra touching' from Lavender. She didn't know how Ron dealt with a girlfriend who was so intent on snogging for hours but didn't want to go further than that. She wasn't even in the relationship and her balls were blue.

Not that she and Ron were talking yet. After she had sent the birds after him, he'd been angry with her and she was too annoyed with how obnoxious he and Lavender were that she wanted nothing to do with either of them.

The Dark Lord had told her and Draco they would not be summoned before the Easter holiday and to make sure they focused on their tasks. He'd winked at her and told her he was pleased that she was enjoying Severus so much before dismissing them.

Knowing from McGonagall that she still had a few hours until Harry and Ginny would return, she bundled up in her warmest clothes and decided to go say hi to Hagrid and Buckbeak. It had been ages since she'd visited them and she had missed them. After Fudge had left office, Hagrid no longer worried for the life of his favourite Hippogriff — even if he still called the beautiful beast Witherwings.

She didn't see anyone on her way to the Entrance Hall, and she made her way onto the grounds, breathing in the fresh air. The snow on the grounds was deep and she used her wand to clear the path to the gamekeeper's hut. As soon as she knocked on the door, Fang began barking like mad and she smiled at his greeting. Nothing made you feel better about yourself than a dog being happy to see you.

Hagrid gave her a big hug then made her a large cup of tea and they sat around his table talking, petting Buckbeak, and scratching Fang behind the ears. One day she would remember the Hippogriff's name had been changed to Witherwings, but that day wasn't happening soon. Hagrid had looked at her funny when Fang wouldn't stop smelling her left forearm, but she waved his concerns off, telling him she probably dropped food on her sleeve. She listened as Hagrid told her all about the latest letter he had received from Madame Maxime before she helped him write a letter back to her in French. He had blushed when she suggested he add a racier sentence or two but acquiesced in the end.

A bell rang by his door, letting him know a student was waiting at the gates. As she was about to leave, he pulled out a missive from Dumbledore for Harry and asked if she would give it to him. Agreeing, she waved goodbye to him, let Buckbeak nuzzle in her hair, and gave Fang a few kisses before heading back to the castle.

As soon as she walked to the entrance to Gryffindor Tower, she ran into Harry, Ginny, and Ron. She gave Harry his letter and they made their way into the common room. Within seconds of crawling through the hole, Lavender began screeching like a Banshee, setting Hermione's anxiety off. Bad mood firmly established, she snapped at Harry and told him to share the big news he had.

She listened to Harry tell her all about how Draco was a Death Eater and Snape was trying to help him do something for Voldemort. She flinched as he said the Dark Lord's name, a shiver running from her Dark Mark to her stomach. She tried to stay as neutral as possible with her friend and his far-fetched, albeit correct, assumptions about Snape and Draco.

She was having an internal battle about telling Harry everything. Him knowing about Snape and Draco wouldn't change anything, so why shouldn't she tell him? A little voice that sounded a lot like Bellatrix reminded her that she had made a promise to their Lord not to tell Harry anything. She was to act as if nothing had changed. She may be Harry's friend, but she was a spy and nothing mattered more than winning the war. And since telling Harry the truth wouldn't help the Dark Lord win, she needed to keep her mouth shut.

Deciding her bad mood wasn't going to improve, she bid Harry goodnight and made her way to her dorm. Maybe a good night's sleep surrounded by the magic of Hogwarts was all she would need to feel better by the morning.

04 Jan 1999

A Horcrux.

The Dark Lord had created a Horcrux and Dumbledore knew it. She'd read all about the Darkest of magics whilst staying at Malfoy Manor over the Christmas holidays. If Dumbledore wanted Harry to find out more about the memory, she had to assume that he knew everything she did, and probably more. Even with as much violence she had done and seen herself, she couldn't imagine creating something so evil. There were some things that were too unnatural and should not be messed with.

They were in the snowy courtyard and Harry was telling her about his latest lessons with Dumbledore. The Headmaster wanted him to get the full memory from Slughorn. Hermione had been dealing with low-level anxiety all morning, even her normal chocolate from Bellatrix hadn't helped like it normally did. She'd thought about going to Madam Pomfrey about a calming draught, but she could live with the feeling of being unsettled for now.

Her mind had been a swirling mess lately and she couldn't understand why. That ritual she'd done on Yule was supposed to have strengthened her, not made her weaker. And that's how she felt. She couldn't focus, her mind was like a tornado, and she didn't know what to do about it. There were moments where she felt normal but then the chaos would come again.

The dreams weren't helping either. If she wasn't dreaming about Bellatrix telling her to listen and follow her commands, she was visited by her grand-mère telling her it was almost over and the answers were in the lab. Whatever that was supposed to mean.

And now she had to figure out if she should keep Harry's confidence or send an owl to Voldemort right away with the information she had just found out. Normally, she wouldn't have hesitated to send the owl, but something was holding her back.

Harry was telling her about Ron's suggestion to hang back after Potions and ask Slughorn for the memory and anger filled her. Why couldn't Harry stop asking what she or Ron thought and make his own decision? Didn't she have enough on her mind already? He was eighteen, a man, and it was time he started making his own decisions.

She snapped at him and stormed out of the courtyard.

She'd think things over for the next few days and then decide what to do. She knew she wouldn't make the right choice if she tried to make it now. She just needed to get a good night's sleep and maybe visit Severus. Her mind was always clearer after a long fuck session with her wizard.

08 Jan 1999

Severus was torn. He knew he should tell Dumbledore what he had seen at Malfoy Manor. The headmaster needed to know that Hermione was a Marked Death Eater and living in the same dorm as Harry Potter. He could only assume the Brat-Who-Lived was still alive because the Dark Lord wanted to wait until the end of the school year to attack him.

How that man could kill people without hesitation, but always seemed to wait until Potter took his exams was beyond him.

In the end, he had decided to wait to talk to Albus until he talked to Hermione. He loved her, and he owed it to her to let her explain herself first. Maybe there was a good reason for why she'd been there. Maybe Dumbledore had asked her to go undercover and not told him.

It was highly unlikely, but the curse on his hand was starting to affect his brain. Plus it didn't make sense that the Dark Lord would Mark her without vetting her for at least a year. His heart clenched when he realised that the specialised ageing potion he had given to Voldemort must have been used on her. She was already an adult in their world and the Muggle world but, like Draco, she would have needed to have her magical core forcibly matured by a couple of years.

Unfortunately, the entire week went by before he could approach her. They'd had a class together, but it had been a practical lesson and he'd been unable to find a reason to hold her back after class. Her spell work and behaviour had been perfect. He was determined to talk to her after the lesson now that it was almost the weekend and Defence was her last class.

The class filed in and he was relieved to see Hermione in her usual Defence attire once she sat down; a see-through shirt, short skirt, and no undergarments of any kind. That meant he'd have no problem keeping her after class. And even though he was torn about what he had seen the week prior, he had missed his witch over the Christmas hols and had been looking forward to being with her again.

And tanning her hide after she explained herself.

He had never been more thankful for his robes than he was today. Hermione had spent the entire lecture rubbing her sweet little cunt and coming over and over again. He didn't know what charms she had cast, but none of her classmates noticed her at all. Or the puddle that he could see on her seat. She was lucky he had iron-clad self-control or he would have bent her over her desk and fucked her right there, the rest of the class be damned.

As soon as the bell rang, she waved her hand, fixing her clothes and cleaning up the mess she had made. She waved Potter out the door, claiming she had a question on the homework assignment.

The door had hardly closed when she warded it and jumped into his arms, wrapping her legs around his waist. Her pussy was dripping and he could feel it seeping into his clothes.

"Take me to your rooms, Severus," she begged. "I need you. Now. I've missed you and your cock."

"Very well," he said, causing her to laugh. He was still torn about his little witch, but he wasn't going to turn her down. Plus, it would be easier to talk to her in the privacy of his rooms.

He led them through the door that connected to his chambers and placed her on his bed. Before he could even begin to remove his boots, her magic washed over him and he was standing there naked. She smirked when he looked at her and all thoughts about talking to her almost left his mind. He wanted to bury himself between her thighs and forget about everything else in the world.

But this was important and he needed to know. Needed her to tell him what was happening.

Crawling onto the bed, he covered her body with his and almost lost his resolve when she began wiggling under him. His cock pressed against her wet core but he didn't push in.

"Wait," he said and she stopped moving, a pout on her face.

"I don't want to wait," she whined. "It's been ages since we were together."

"I know, but we need to talk for a minute."

"About?"

"About the fact that you're a Death Eater. You think I wouldn't recognise this body when you were displayed on the Dark Lord's lap, Hermione?"

"Yes, I'm a Death Eater." She whispered a spell and the glamour fell from her arm, displaying her Dark Mark. "I was Marked in July and I've been spying on Harry since. I don't have much information to give the Dark Lord, but he seems happy with my results."

Snape stared at her, his mind racing. He didn't understand why Voldemort needed her as a spy when he was already spying on the Order. Unless Hermione was only spying on Harry. Which would make sense. Who had more access to Potter than his best friend? But why Hermione? And how? She was Muggleborn. Why would she ever willingly join the Death Eaters? Their entire goal was to bring Muggles under their rule, and Muggleborns would be treated as little more than house-elves in the new regime. What could they have possibly said to her to convince her to join their side?

Questions raced through his mind and he couldn't figure out which one to ask first. Finally settling on one, he touched her face.

"Hermione, what made you join?" he asked. He needed to tread carefully so she would open up to him.

"I started writing to Bella before school ended last year," she explained. "It is clear the Order won't win. Joining the Dark Lord now, helping him win, will secure my spot by his side once we take over."

None of what she was saying made sense to him. Well, it made sense. It was an absolutely Slytherin way to think. Pick the winning side, regardless of how you feel, and you'll come out on top. But Hermione wasn't a Slytherin. Sure, she was ambitious, resourceful, a natural leader, but she wasn't the kind of cunning she was talking about. He didn't even think she had it in her. His witch was all about Good vs Evil, justice and rules.

But he was a Slytherin. He knew to use all of his skills to get what he wanted and to find out what he needed to know. And whilst he wasn't a fan of tricking his witch, sometimes you had to do things you didn't like to get what you needed.

"Hermione," his voice was deep and smooth as he said her name and he ground his cock against her centre, making her moan. "I want to possess you. Do you want that, love?"

"Yes! Take me, Severus."

"I want to enter your mind. I want you to show me your memories of how you became a Death Eater. Can you be a good girl and show me?"

She hesitated for a moment before nodding. "I want to give all of myself to you."

His heart broke at her words. How long had he wished a woman would say that to him? And now the woman he wanted was saying it, but he didn't know if he could have her anymore. He loved her, but could he stay with someone who was willingly serving the Dark Lord when he no longer believed in that purpose? When he was fighting to bring the monster and his followers down?

Either way, he had to see her memories.

It was a violation of her trust, but he needed to get as much information from her as possible so he could take it to Dumbledore. The Order would need to decide what to do with Hermione. It was out of his hands now.

Knowing this might be the last time he would be with her, he shifted, pushing his cock into her as he entered her mind.

His mind and body were pulled in different directions as her warmth surrounded his body, her moans filling his ears, but her mind was trying to bring him in and push him out at the same time.

He'd been in hundreds of minds before, but they were nothing like this.

Her memories were swirling, some trying to be seen, like the night she was Marked, but others were locked away. It all looked so foreign and yet so familiar to him at the same time. He walked down the stone corridors of her mind, his hips moving in and out of her, and tried to figure out where he was.

He turned a corner and stopped dead. He'd been here before. During the darkest time of his life. When Lily had died and the Ministry had held him for questioning for a week.

Hermione called out to him, begging him to go faster, to fuck her harder, and her voice echoed down the empty halls of Azkaban prison. He knew she'd never been there before so how had she created such a realistic replication in her mind? Nothing was making sense. And where was she? Normally when he entered someone's mind he could hear their thoughts but nothing was coming from her.

As he felt her start to tighten around him, the cackling voice of Bellatrix Lestrange filled his ears and he took off running towards the cell in the back. His hips stuttered and Hermione cried out in frustration and suddenly Bellatrix was gone. Hoping he was right, he moved his hand between their bodies and began to circle her clit.

As soon as he touched her, the cell next to him lit up and Bella came back into view. He entered and watched what was happening in confusion. The scene behind him made no sense. The crazy bint was standing in a Muggle neighbourhood and pointing her wand at Hermione. The scene changed and they were in Malfoy Manor and Hermione was struggling as Bellatrix forced her to drink a potion.

Snape felt sick as he recognised the brew. He had created it specifically to make a person weak, malleable. To break down all their walls and bring them over your control. Hermione was tightening around him again, her body thrusting up into his and he got an idea. He'd created the potion and he thought he knew how to break it's control over her. Hoping it would work, he began to increase his movements.

"I want you to bite me, love," he spoke directly into her mind. "Mark me. I want the world to know I'm yours."

Her mind lit up at his words and he could hear the bars of the cells begin to rattle.

"Come on, little witch."

"Mine?" her voice asked him, timid and unsure. "Yours?"

"I belong to you. And you... You are mine. My love. My little witch. Now bite me. As hard as you can."

Her teeth sunk into his throat as her cunt clamped down around his dick. He used all his strength not to come but cried out in pain as her teeth tore through his flesh. Her mind began to change as his blood touched her tongue.

"That's it, love," he encouraged her. "Keep biting. Suck my neck. I want you to taste my blood. Take me into you."

He felt the mixture of repulsion and arousal as she followed his directions. With each suck, her mind changed more and more. The walls were changing from stone to bookshelves and the cells to study nooks. They still had doors on them, but he could help her with that.

Slowly he removed himself from her mind.

His hips were still moving and her pussy was massaging him. He was so close to coming and wanted to fill her. Her lips were still red with his blood. He met her gaze and her eyes were wide, full of fear and also lust. He'd never seen anyone look so vulnerable and the knowledge that he was currently fucking a woman that hadn't been in her right mind for months caught up to him.

Without thinking about it, he pulled out of her, ran to his bathroom and stepped into the shower, letting the orgasm he couldn't hold back splash onto the tile floor as the water started automatically. He placed his hand to his bleeding neck and healed the bite mark she'd left.

He was shaking and doing everything in his power to stay upright when he felt her behind him and her arms wrapped around his back.

"Get out!" he cried.

"No," she said firmly, tightening her grip on him.

"Miss Granger, you need–"

"Severus Snape, you will not call me Miss Granger, and I will not leave. I need you."

"Need me to rape you again? The last few months haven't been enough for you?" he spat.

He felt her sigh behind him but her arms didn't move from his body. "My mind is hazy, I'm not sure what's happening, but I know one thing. I pursued you, not the other way around. And, I need you to help me."

"Hermione, I… I…" his voice caught and he couldn't talk.

"We're going to shower, I'm going to steal pyjamas from you, have an elf bring us tea, and we're going to talk. Okay?"

"Okay."

He could do that. He could follow her commands. He didn't know how long it would take until Hermione was back to who she was before Bellatrix had compromised her, but he was going to be there with her as long as she wanted him to be there. He'd brewed the potion she was given and luckily her consuming some of his blood had weakened the bond, the failsafe he'd added helping her a bit.

They'd drink their tea, then he'd take her into his lab and they'd brew the antidote to the potion. Once she was clear from its effects, he'd help her by sorting through her memories, talking to her, staying away from her; whatever she needed to heal.

Even though it had all been fake, a result of a potion for her, it was real for him. He loved her and he would do what needed to be done to make her whole once more. Even if that meant he couldn't have her again.

Hermione curled under Severus' arm as he brewed the antidote to the potion she had been given by Bellatrix. From what she could tell from her hazy memories, she'd been given it at the beginning of July, just days after she'd graduated from Hogwarts. Snape's blood had weakened the locks on her memories, but she wasn't trying to break them. She wasn't sure what she would find when she did.

She was in a strange kind of in-between space. She felt like her old, non-potioned self to an extent, but only if she focused on it. She could remember everything she'd done in the service of the Dark Lord, but if she didn't think about it, it didn't bother her at all. But she knew if she really looked at her memories, she would be horrified. It was easier to not think about them and just focus on being in Severus' arms. There would be time to examine what she'd done, but she wasn't ready yet.

As scared as she was, as worried as she was, she knew she was safe in Severus' embrace.

Bellatrix had been right when she said that she didn't trust him, that Severus was loyal to the Order and not to Voldemort. There was no way he would be working so hard to reverse what had been done to her if he was on the Dark Lord's side. He had given in to her advances, but he wasn't a monster, he wasn't evil.

She didn't know how she felt about him, but she needed him. She knew she had feelings, but she didn't trust herself to know if they were her feelings or manufactured by Bellatrix. Her instinct was to believe that her feelings were real. Bellatrix hadn't been there when he kissed her, when he'd held her.

Severus was the best thing in her life right now. Him and her daily chocolates.

She froze.

The chocolates.

The ones Bellatrix sent her every week. The chocolates she ate every single morning without fail. The ones she ate even though she didn't really like chocolate. She'd always been into savoury snacks instead of sweets. How had she not noticed that she'd been eating chocolate every morning since July?

"Severus," she said, her voice breaking the silence of his personal potions lab.

"Hmm?" he murmured, not taking his eyes off the antidote he was making.

"I think I've been taking the potion every day."

His head snapped towards her, but he never stopped stirring. "Explain."

She told him all about the chocolates and how they had been delivered weekly since she left Malfoy manor over the summer. She told him all about how she didn't like the sweet but ate it anyway, almost without thought.

"Fuck. I only designed the potion to be taken once and then monthly as needed. It might take longer than I thought to get that potion out of your body, Hermione. But we will. I promise. You were probably compelled to take it daily. Where are they?"

"In my bag. A new box of them will arrive on Sunday.."

He nodded and had her summon them. "I will analyse these and make sure no changes were made to the original potion I invented. If it was modified, I can still create an antidote. We'll get you through this."

"I know you will, Severus." She hugged him around the waist with one arm. "I trust you."